
Untoxicated Podcast
428 episodes — Page 5 of 9
Ep229 – Roundtable: Navigating Custody of the Kids
***Trigger Warning: Death from alcohol abuse is discussed. Julie, Rachel, Becky and Melanie join the conversation and help Sheri and Matt break down the issues surrounding custody agreements and co-parenting arrangements. From the impact these decisions have on the, “should I stay or should I go,” decision, to communicating with the kids, this roundtable episode covers a lot of ground with some very insightful perspectives. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep228 – Loneliness Leads to Drinking, Drinking Leads to Loneliness
We would never blame one person’s alcoholism on the attitude or actions of their partner. But it is also naive to ignore that loneliness in a relationship is an underlying issue that leads to self-medication. And that self-medication creates more distance. Guess what that distance leads to? (If you guessed, “more drinking,” you are picking up what we are laying down on this nuanced and complex episode.) Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep227 – Recovery Rumble: Amber vs. Matt
In this corner, making her third appearance on the Untoxicated Podcast, is Master Addiction Counselor, star and host of the Put the Shovel Down YouTube channel, the one, the only, the fabulous Amber Hollingsworth. And in this corner, is an old drunk who seems to now be addicted to asking questions and forming opinion about addiction, Sheri’s husband Matt. Sheri referees as these two go toe to toe about the role of the family in the recovery of someone suffering from addiction. It is a seven-round battle about support and detachment. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep226 – Enthusiastic Consent
The more Sheri and Matt learn, the more undeniable the connection is between emotional intimacy, physical intimacy, sexual satisfaction and trust. Understanding the connection requires understanding the ways in which alcoholism does damage to intimacy in romantic partnerships. Sheri laughs and cries hard in this emotional episode. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep225 – D!@k Olympics: Size Isn’t Everything, but You Are a Big One
Early sobriety from high-functioning alcoholism is plagued with dopamine depletion and identity crisis resulting in mood swings, tension, sadness, thin skin and meanness. As a three-time gold medalist in the 2017 D!@k Olympics, Matt leads a roundtable discussion about what is takes to qualify for, and succeed in, this gruelling competition. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep224 – Remembering Why We Fell in Love
There is conflict inherent in alcoholic relationships. And conflict brings guilt. Regardless of the outcome of the relationship, the conflict and guilt deserves relief. Sheri and Matt talk about the benefits of taking the time to remember why we fell in love. Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep223 – Reconciling the Role of Family
Merry Christmas! During the holiday season, strained family relations manifest in challenging ways. There is perhaps no better time for Sheri and Matt to talk about the role of family in support of recovery – for the alcoholic or the loved one. Are we expecting too much? Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep222 – Scary Ghost Stories of Christmases Not Long Ago
It’s the most wonderful time of the year. At least that’s how it is hyped. If you are living through the holiday season with active alcoholism or early sobriety, the trauma and nervous system dysregulation can make this time of the year terrifying. On this episode, Sheri and Matt relive some relatable memories, give you a completely unnecessary education about the whole grain bakery business, and share some hope for your not-to-distant future. Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep221 – Be Careful What You Wish For with Traci and Andy
Traci is back on the podcast! And this time, she brought her husband, Andy, along for the conversation. It has been over three years since Traci laid some wisdom on us in Ep61 when she lamented that when Andy got sober, it turned out that he had opinions. Five years into Andy’s sobriety, they both continue to grow and recover, and Traci is here to tell us all to be careful what we wish for. This is a powerful story of the self-discovery that often hides behind relationship recovery. And to clarify the confusion surrounding Sheri’s and Matt’s spontaneous duet, it was Neil singing with Barbara, and Sheri was right as usual: it is bring, not buy.
Ep220 – The Pain Concoction
There are a lot of universalisms in alcoholism and recovery, for the drinkers and the loved ones. One thing that sets each of us apart is the pain concoction that leads to sobriety and recovery. The pain concoction is the opposite of the reason for Sheri’s new-found love of Dr. Pepper. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep219 – Barbara’s Grief, Guilt and Growth
*** Warning: suicide and death are discussed Barbara first appeared on the podcast almost three years ago on Ep70 when she shared the story of her husband’s alcoholism that led to her becoming a living organ donor before their eventual divorce. Barbara’s story has progressed significantly, and so has her understanding of the impact of alcohol on her and the man she loved. The emotional twists and turns, drenched in guilt and grief, might surprise you. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep218 – Holiday Triggers and the Healing Power of Time
Traditions and triggers go hand in hand, and at no time is that more prevalent than during the holiday season. Sheri and Matt discuss how triggers and traditions have changed for them over time. They also brag about their credentials, and the talents derived from long toes, in a cringey sort of way. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep217 – Separation Roundtable: The Critical Mindset Shift
We did not set out to record three episodes on the topic of relationship separation, but the response to parts one and two has been overwhelming, so we are proud to bring you this third installment in our unintentional series. Listen for the unmistakable balance of pride, humility, vulnerability and commitment in the voices of our three panelists who all credit the separation demanded by their spouses as being foundational in their sobriety and relationship recovery progress. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you are a drinker seeking sobriety, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.
Ep216 – Lowered Standards and Disappointing Outcomes
***Trigger Warning – Talk of Self Harm and Suicide It is common knowledge that alcoholism is a progressive disease in relation to the volume and frequency of consumption. What is rarely considered is that the loved ones of alcoholics lower their own standards in a progressive way as well. In this episode, Sheri and Matt talk about the origins of our baseline standards, progressive deterioration, and how important it is to return to baseline in recovery. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep215 – Expectations
When is recovery over? When can we call declare success? Sheri and Matt discuss the baseline expectations that everyone deserves to have met in a thriving, loving relationship. They also discuss the expectations that lead to disappointment, and how those unmet expectations are often misdiagnosed as an indication that the person or the relationship isn’t successful in recovery. (And the Chris is Chris Wallace…son of Mike Wallace. (listen and find out)) Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep214 – The Healing Power of Separation Roundtable
Sheri and Matt welcome Nicole, Lisa, Sarah, Shannon and Kelly to the podcast to share their real-life experiences with separation from their alcoholic spouses. Some of the separations led to divorce. Some of the separations led to sobriety and reconciliation. Some of the separations are new, and some have transpired over years. The two things all of our panelists have in common is that they have experienced the healing power of separation, and they are brave enough to share their stories for the benefit of our Untoxicated listeners. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep213 – Detachment and Separation
Sheri and Matt deal with Matt’s hypocrisy about supporting detachment in alcoholic relationships. up to and including physical separation, when the couple never got separated themselves during his active addiction or recovery. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep212 – Curiosity in Relationship Recovery
No transition was more important to Sheri’s and Matt’s relationship recovery than when Matt stopped telling Sheri what she was doing wrong and started trying to understand why she felt the way she did. It was a major shift that saved their marriage, and they talk all about it on this episode. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep211 – The Recovery Revolution with Cory Martin
Comedian and Recovery Coach, Cory Martin, joins Sheri and Matt for this insightful and deep episode That’s right, she’s not just about laughs. Cory pairs humor with some unconventional and well thought out ideas and perspectives including her 7 Active Principles of Conscious Recovery. She challenges some of Sheri’s and Matt’s thinking, and shares stories of how her experiences have informed her innovative ideas. If you like what you hear, check out Cory’s programs for the loved ones of alcoholics at The Recovery Revolution website, and follow @therecoveryrevolution on Instagram. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep210 – Is My Husband’s Alcoholism My Fault?
No. That’s the short version of the title question’s answer. An emphatic, “no,” in fact. But as with most of the world’s hard-to-solve problems, there is much more to the story. On this episode, Sheri and Matt breakdown what happens in a alcoholic relationship breakdown, the roles of the partners, and how the relationship can be repaired. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep209 – A Fit for Everyone: Recovery Program Roundtable
Our six panelist share their experiences and perceptions with a wide variety of alcohol addiction recovery programs. Some common themes emerge, like the healing power of finding your tribe, and that when it comes to recovery programs, there is no one size that fits all. Our roundtable discusses the role of science, the role of spirituality, traditional methods, new ideas, large formats, small groups, free resources and programs that are more of an investment in your recovery. If you are not sure what program might be right for you or your loved one, this discussion is for you. And if you decide to check out our own SHOUT Sobriety program, please click this link.
Ep208 – The Developing Story Writing Workshop for Teens
Sheri and Matt welcome the most special of guests, their daughter, Cathryn, for a return visit to the podcast. This time, instead of working through the heart wrenching experiences of Cathryn’s childhood, like they did on Ep200, they talk through all the details about their newest program: The Developing Story Writing Workshop for teens who have been impacted by alcohol abuse in the family. Cathryn shares how writing her story has helped her process the trauma, they discuss possible writing prompts, and Sheri reveals how stuffing down her father’s alcoholism has caused her lingering challenges in adulthood. If you are considering The Developing Story as part of your family’s healing process, tune in for all the details and check it out at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri, Matt and Cathryn start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask them something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].
Ep207 – Happily in the Middle
Sheri and Matt discuss the personality type that often underlies high-functioning alcoholism. Removing the alcohol doesn’t change the personality, and for Matt, and millions of others, the work of recovery is understanding their discomfort with contentment. Confused much? Give this one a listen. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep206 – Surviving and Thriving with Kim Augustus
Kim’s nervous system, her mental health and her marriage were all suffering from the trauma of addiction. A happy ending seemed woefully unlikely. But with persistence, fortunate timing and openness to consider different alternatives, Kim’s husband has found lasting sobriety, and theirs is a story of redemption and hope – a story Kim thrives from telling. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep205 – The Addiction Triangle
Addiction sucks so much of the air from any relationship. Then in early sobriety, recovery work replaces alcohol taking priority over the alcoholic’s family. As recovery continues, that third energy intruding on the relationship morphs into replacement addiction and other family issues. Having something there, the third side of the triangle, becomes a compulsive need in and of itself. In this episode, Sheri and Matt talk about how this has manifested in their marriage, and what they are doing about it. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep204 – Love, Loss & Forgiveness with Bhavini
It’s the story of a romantic courtship and the rekindling of a spark felt when they were in their youth. Bhavini loved him and wanted so badly for it to work that she ignored the red flags that she recognizes only now in hindsight. As she processes her whirlwind experience as the spouse of an alcoholic, she pays tribute to love, learning and a deep thoughtfulness woven through her emotionally moving story. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep203 – Bravery
Bravery is not just about what you do or say or refuse to tolerate. There is another component. Bravery is also about what you are up against. In this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss his relentlessness as a tyrannical protector of their family secret, and what bravery was in Sheri’s circumstances. Sometimes, often really, survival is a remarkable display of tremendous bravery. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep202 – LIVE from the Echoes of Recovery Retreat
Who has the right to tell the story and seek support? When you are involved in an alcoholic marriage, your stories are woven together, and opening up means shame and anger. But it also means relief and healing. How do you find balance? That’s the topic that ten very experienced loved ones explore LIVE from our Echoes of Recovery retreat in the Colorado Rocky Mountains. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep201 – Alcoholic Parenting: Teaching Dishonesty, Fear & Hatred
Ep200 was Cathryn’s story. Sheri’s and Matt’s insightful and intelligent daughter shared her experiences of growing up with high-functioning alcoholism, and she revealed things on that episode that shocked Matt and confirmed Sheri’s sadness. On this episode, Sheri and Matt react. This is not about defensiveness. This is about the very start of coming to grips with the destruction. Alcohol has no respect for what we want for our children. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep200 – Our Daughter, Cathryn
What better way to honor our bicentennial episode than with the most special guest in the history of the podcast, Sheri’s and Matt’s daughter. Cathryn describes in painful detail what it is like to grow up in a house with a high-functioning-alcoholic parent. It is amazing how many similarities they discuss between the defense mechanisms of the children and the defense mechanism of the spouses. It is equally eye opening how and why Cathryn kept her truth hidden from Matt for so many years. If you think you have done a good job of protecting your kids from the ravages of alcoholism, you should listen. If you have a teen who could benefit from exploring our newest program, a writing workshop, led by Cathryn, for teenagers who have been impacted by the drinking of someone close to them, we encourage you to check out The Developing Story.
Ep199 – Relapse
There are short-term relapses that last a day or a weekend or a week, and there are long-term relapses that last weeks or months. Can you guess which type of relapse Sheri and Matt have come to believe is more dangerous? Like everything else related to addiction and recovery, the answer is counterintuitive (and worth a listen). Also, Matt guesses right. Kelly Miller’s awesome new podcast is called The Addiction Nutritionist Podcast. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep198 – Roundtable Q&A with Amber Hollingsworth
She is back with her signature combination of charm, empathy and brutal honesty that many of our listeners recognize from her engaging and informative YouTube channel, Put the Shovel Down. Addiction Counselor Amber Hollingsworth makes a return appearance on the podcast – this time answering questions from lots of our listeners and participants in our Echoes of Recovery group. In addition to her YouTube channel, check out all the resources on her Hope for Families website. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep197 – The Shame and Hiding Continues after Alcohol
This episode quickly devolves into an hour long therapy session for Matt. He and Sheri talk about judgement, shame and hiding, with a healthy dose of religion and spirituality in reaction to a listener question. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep196 – Guilt
Guilt can be a motivator. Guilt can be a moral compass. Guilt is not all bad. But the guilt that builds and festers in a family that is dealing with alcoholism is anything but helpful. On this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the distinction, and offer suggestions for how we can manage the overwhelming guilt experienced in an alcoholic partnership. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep195 – Back Home Again in Alcohol(ism?)
Back home Again in Indiana, and Sheri and Matt were thrust unexpectedly into the deep end of alcohol impact. If you think addiction is required in order for alcohol to leave painful, traumatic memories, give this episode a listen. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep194 – Vacation Anxiety and Trauma
The bathing suits, blue ocean waves and smiling faces posted to social media don’t tell the true story of vacations for families experiencing alcohol addiction or early sobriety. The truth behind the strained smiles is nothing short of trauma. And the anxiety caused by past vacation implosions can haunt the loved ones for years to come. On this episode, Sheri and Matt are thrilled to host a panel of guests who share their alcohol-impacted vacation experiences. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep193 – Recovery Timeline
Sheri and Matt talk about the individual pieces of recovery all the time: resentment processing, nervous system stabilization, trust building, intimacy, etc. But until now, they have never put the pieces together on a timeline. In this episode, they lay out what might be expected as you move through the stages of recovery from alcoholism – as individuals, and as a couple. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep192 – The Power of Choice
Seven women who have made the impossibly difficult choice to move on from alcoholism through divorce talk about the challenges and the triumphs of their own personal recoveries. Some had small children, some had grown children and some had no children at the time of divorce. In come cases, their ex-husbands are now sober. In some cases, their ex-husbands are still drinking. Tragically, one of the ex-husbands lost his life to this disease. And while their stories have many differences, all seven of these alcoholism warriors have one thing in common: they fought hard to find the power to choose a better outcome. As Barbara says early in the episode, “Sometimes the happy ending is the divorce.” That statement turns our societal messaging on its head. That statement is also very true, and these seven stories prove it. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep191 – Accountability, Envy, Fear, Anger & Blaming the Alcohol
Many of the people finding success in the alcoholism recovery community embrace some form of assigning the blame to the alcohol. And yet, so many people who are trying to recover, both the alcoholics and the loved ones, struggle with this concept. On this episode, Sheri and Matt break it down and try to identify the obstacles that keep people stuck: accountability, envy, fear and anger. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep190 – Demand what You Deserve
If you are the spouse of an alcoholic, you deserve sobriety. But even once your relationship enters sobriety, you deserve more. You deserve a partner who carries his own weight, and is tough enough to hear the hard stuff. It is not enough to expect what you deserve. You have to be strong enough to demand it. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep189 – Will I Ever Trust Again?
Sheri and Matt break trust down into three components: safety, intimacy and honesty. Trust is the last thing to come back in a marriage that has suffered through alcoholism, and understanding how to work on this tripod of relationship recovery is critical. Don’t underestimate how much harder repair is versus starting over fresh. Also, Matt shows how old he is by sharing lots of stupid sayings that need generational translation (while Sheri rolls her eyes). Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep188 – Relapse Threat after Rehab
The threat of relapse after an inpatient rehab is real, but the threat is coming from more directions than we might understand. Sheri and Matt talk about threats posed by loss of identity, a lack of emotional expression, and the trading of self-care for stress. Be cautious when those 30 days are up. No matter what the calendar or the insurance company says, growth and discovery are never over. Unless, of course, you aren’t opposed to relapse. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep187 – What is Fun?
As a drinker, alcohol was an major component of Matt’s identity. And alcohol also influenced how he had fun. Phrases like, “Work hard, play hard,” and, “You’ll get all the sleep you need when you’re dead,” were Matt’s mantras. So when alcohol is foundational to your identity, and play-hard partying is an emotional motivator, how the hell do you know who you are or how to have fun in sobriety? Sheri and Matt have some laughs, and a few tears, tackling this question. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep186 – Marriages in Recovery Need Sex
Did the definitive statement of this episode title get your attention? We know there are strong emotions when it comes to sex and intimacy in relationships impacted by alcoholism, and Sheri and Matt continue to try to navigate their own experiences, stirred together with what they are learning both formally and informally. Matt reveals the identity of his intimacy hero, and Sheri starts the episode with a bold statement about why healthy intimacy is important to her. If you are waiting to tackle sex and intimacy when things get better in your relationship, you might want to give this one a listen. Hint: You might be stuck waiting forever. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep185 – Simply Health Conscious with Graham Hawley
Get ready to get your nutrition, exercise and healthy habits on with Graham Hawley – certified health and wellness coach, Matt’s soccer buddy and the inspiration behind Sheri’s and Matt’s plan for resentment processing (if you are sick if hearing the couple talk about weekly meetings, this is the guy you can blame). Follow Graham’s excellent videos and other resources @simplyhealthconscious on Instagram or on the web. Now let’s get rolling with some healthy habits and some accountability, and let’s avoid those lifestyle diseases (like alcoholism). Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].
Ep184 – Danger from Within
What happens when the person you trust and most rely on for mutual protection becomes the most dangerous person in your life? Does this sound like a setup for Matt to exaggerate? Hear Sheri’s emotion, and decide for yourself. See if you can listen, and still downplay the impact. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep183 – The Truth Seeping Out with Mindy and Deb
Warning – Discussion includes talk of self harm. Living with alcoholism means trying to keep the truth a secret. But as alcoholism progresses, the truth seeps out. Sheri and Matt are joined by Mindy and Deb who have both lived with and loved alcoholics, and share traumatic stories of truth. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep182 – Navigating Positive, Neutral, Negative and Silent Reactions
Sheri and Matt react to Amber Hollingsworth’s advice from Ep181 about how the spouse of an alcoholic can respond to the behavior of the person suffering from addiction. Their discussion about their real-life experience demonstrates how challenging these relationships are to navigate, and how unprepared we all are for the impact of alcohol on our lives. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep181 – Put the Shovel Down with Amber Hollingsworth
She is an addiction counselor who values the role of the family in the addiction recovery process. She shares a wealth of resources on her Hope for Families website. But many of our listeners know her for her engaging and informative YouTube channel, Put the Shovel Down. She is the one and only Amber Hollingsworth, and to Sheri’s and Matt’s considerable delight, she is our guest on this episode. We cover a lot of ground from what it means to be addicted to someone, to the impact of the trauma of addiction, to dealing with resentment and restoring intimacy. Amber has a charming way of making the most difficult challenges feel doable. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
Ep180 – The Role of Intimacy in Relationship Recovery
Sheri and Matt review Come As You Are, the best-selling book by Dr. Emily Nagoski. They discuss sexual anatomy and how we all have the same parts just organized in different ways. Matt tells Sheri what a clitoris is, and it is worth tuning in for her reaction. They discuss Dr. Nagoski’s explanation of what hits the accelerator, and what hits the brakes, when it comes to desire, arousal, intimacy, and orgasm. And they discuss the incredibly important, and mostly ignored or misunderstood, role of circumstantial and mindset context. As if that isn’t enough, Sheri and Matt discuss how this all relates to recovering a relationship from alcoholism. If you blush when you hear the word, “penis,” you are going to want your earbuds for this one. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question (the book review starts at 23:55). Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.