The Angry Therapist Podcast

In this episode, John and Vanessa host a workshop for couples, and read off a list of twelve principles every healthy relationship must have. They talk about the importance of protecting the safety and security of the relationship, transparency and communication, supporting each other in distress, never threatening the existence of the relationship, protecting each other from harmful behaviors, and so much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the importance of investing in someone who has a life and the ability to rebuild it. He emphasizes that when two people have their own lives and passions, it creates a healthy boundary and stabilizes the relationship. He also highlights the significance of resilience, growth mindset, personal development in building a fulfilling life, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the importance of finding someone with a fire in their belly when investing in a relationship. He emphasizes the need to know where you're going before asking who's going with you, and shares his personal journey of self-discovery and finding purpose. He also highlights the significance of having a passion, but to be cautious about dating someone who is solely focused on work and lacks balance in other areas of their life. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the importance of taking ownership in relationships. He explains that someone who takes ownership is willing to accept responsibility for their actions and behaviors, rather than being defensive or blaming others. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the process of turning a breakup into a breakthrough. He emphasizes the importance of reframing the story of a breakup, swimming past the breakers, healing emotional triggers, breaking up with oneself, letting go of attachments, and embracing rebirth. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John brings on Shaun (The Love Drive) to talk about how hurtful ghosting can be, what "mommy issues" look like in relationships, whether long distance relationships can work or not, the inability to say "I love you," why you keep attracting unavailable partners, if watching pornography is cheating, and more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John reflects things he's currently struggling with. He shares insights on finding joy in simple moments, the importance of self-awareness and self-acceptance, challenges of parenting and the need for self-compassion, exploring and expanding sexuality later in life, the need for patience and trust in the process, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the four pillars of a healthy relationship, embracing the realities of a relationship, and the beauty in the struggle. He emphasizes the importance of chemistry, maintaining separate identities, aligning on a common vision, and building a connection in a relationship. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John reads a story, "My P*ssy Knows Things," that explores the impact of past relationships on present behavior and emotional well-being. He also dives into the concept of grieving the loss of a relationship, the importance of accepting and processing associated emotions, being resistant to therapy, the transformation that occurs when individuals confront their past, and more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks to Shaun Galanos (The Love Drive) about various topics including fear of missing out (FOMO), polyamory, dating rejection, and attachment styles. They also highlight the importance of communication, emotional regulation, coping with dating rejection, and redefining what rejection means. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John debriefs with Sarah and Meredith about the most recent TAT retreat on the drive home. They all talk about what their role is, their revelations running the retreats, the lessons they've learned in each retreat, the importance of breath work, how therapeutic cooking is, how to calm down your nervous system, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about love. He defines what his definition of love used to be, and what it is now. He also talks about ways to know if you love someone, feelings to look for, how real love is about embracing conflict - not jumping ship the second things start to feel hard, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John interviews Todd Baratz, a male sex therapist, about love and intimacy. They discuss the concept of 'losing your mind' when falling in love and the challenges that arise in relationships. Todd also shares his personal journey about how he became a therapist, talks about the changing attitudes towards sex and the stigma that still exists, emphasizes the importance of understanding one's own trauma and how it can impact relationships, and promotes his book 'How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind.' Todd Baratz is a renowned psychotherapist and sex therapist whose innovative approach to mental health and relationships has established him as a leading figure in his field. In addition to his clinical practice, Baratz is a prolific writer and speaker. His insights are regularly featured in various media outlets, where he discusses topics ranging from romantic relationships to individual mental wellness. He lives in New York City and Los Angeles. Learn more on Instagram under his handle YourDiagnonsense. Follow Todd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourdiagnonsense/?hl=en Check out his website: https://www.toddsbaratz.com/ Buy Todd's book: 'How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind.' https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/723331/how-to-love-someone-without-losing-your-mind-by-todd-baratz-lmhc/ Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this bonus episode, John has an encouraging message for those going through a break up. He opens up about break ups he's been through, lessons he's learned from each, and gives tips on how to break through your break up if you're currently going through one. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John starts with a list of "Johnisms" before answering listener's questions. John gives advice on what to do if you have feelings for a friend, how to rebuild trust in a marriage after it's been broken, and how to handle finding your significant other's secret Tinder account. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about poor habits, how we all have them, and how taking small steps towards breaking the habits is more successful than stopping the habits cold turkey. He also talks about being depressed when life feels "boring," and how to that leads to feelings of wanting to escape. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how doing a life audit on yourself will help strengthen the relationship you have with your partner and others. He explains how the more you focus on yourself, the more you'll be able to bring to the table with others, and walks through the process of what giving yourself a life audit looks like. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John brings on Dr. MC McDonald to discuss the concept of awe and the science behind joy. They explore the importance of finding joy in small moments, activating the hope circuit in the brain, and also debunk some misconceptions about what brings joy, such as affirmations. The conversation also touches on topics like trauma, imagination, flow states, the power of finding beauty in contrast, and accepting people for who they are. You can buy MC's book, Unbroken, HERE Follow MC on Instagram HERE or TikTok HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John answers a listener's question after they've emailed him for advice about their current relationship. He dives into avoidant attachment styles, and gives advice on how to know if you're attachment style is to blame for feeling "suffocated" in the relationship, or if you're only feeling this way because deep down you know that your partner isn't right for you. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John Kim and Luci Lampe discuss the concept of conscious self-pleasure and its impact on personal growth and relationships. They also explore how shame and societal conditioning can hinder sexual expression and the importance of approaching self-pleasure with presence and mindfulness. Luci Lampe is a mom of 4, trauma-informed sex & relationship coach, award-winning singer and songwriter, commercial actress & print model, and 3X author. Her writing has been featured on the Huffington Post, Forbes, Entrepreneur.com, CBS, and Fox. You can find out more about Luci HERE or follow her on Instagram HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John explores the importance of redefining our definitions of love as we grow and change. He also highlights how our definitions of love are always changing, the challenges and beauty of love, and the importance of aligning definitions with our partners. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how to express your needs, and show up in your relationship when you're fighting. He discusses the importance of knowing what is healthy vs unhealthy ways of showing up during conflict, and gives examples of what each looks like. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John records a live podcast in his TAT Circle community where he answers listeners' questions, and does a deep dive on attachment styles. He talks about the honeymoon phase of a relationship, what's really happening when you feel like your attachment is being activated, and how to tell if it's your attachment style that's being triggered, or the relationship isn't right for you. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about thought patterns, and why we find ourselves stuck in negative thought patterns more than positive ones. He dives into different steps to take when you find yourself spiraling, and how to practice wanting things loosely. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John and Vanessa talk about recovering from codependency. They talk about the steps you need to take, such as having awareness and setting boundaries, what recovering from codependency really looks like in your life and relationships, and how recovery doesn't happen overnight. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John focuses on cheating and infidelity. He discusses common reasons why people cheat, including anger or revenge, falling out of love, feeling unappreciated, lack of commitment, sexual desire, and situational opportunity. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John does a deep dive on three different ways you can elevate your partner and relationship by being curious about your partner and their experiences, championing their story, and asking them how you can work on fulfilling their needs. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In the final episode of the Red & Green Flags in Dating series, John talks about how important having capacity for yourself and others is in your relationships. He defines what capacity is, gives examples and what it looks like in action, and explains the difference between having a healthy vs an unhealthy amount of capacity in dating and relationships. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John does a deep dive on the second C of Red & Green Flags in Dating, communication. John discusses what healthy and unhealthy communication looks like in relationships, and what red flags you should look for that shows someone does not communicate well in the early stages of dating. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In the first episode of a three part series, Red & Green Flags in Dating, John breaks down the three most important C's in dating: connection, communication, and capacity. He defines what connection is, gives examples of what healthy and unhealthy forms of connection are, and discusses red and green flags to look for in connection when you're first dating someone. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how to be open to love after your heart has been broken. He dives into how practicing opening your heart up in your relationships is an exercise you need to practice daily in order to create the opportunity to heal and grow from your break up. He also talks about forgiveness, treating yourself, closure, finding people who understand you, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John reflects on his 51st birthday and shares his revelations and insights about life. He discusses the importance of self-reflection, accepting oneself as a 'B-side', the value of movement and fitness, the power of asking for what you want, the significance of friendships, the importance of finding peace, the process of closure, the cumulative nature of life, and the need to let go of what no longer serves us. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John answers a listener's question, and discusses the reasons why people cheat, including emotional disconnection, curiosity, and unhappiness within oneself. He also addresses the issue of ghosting, the fear of having difficult conversations, the importance of exploring patterns in relationships and understanding one's contribution to them, and provides insights on creating a safe space for partners to work through infidelity and rebuilding trust. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John explores the different dimensions of intimacy, including emotional, spiritual, mental, passionate, physical, and energy intimacy. He emphasizes the importance of creating a safe space for emotional vulnerability, engaging in meaningful conversations, and practicing empathy and compassion. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John brings on Mark Groves to discuss his book 'Liberated Love' and the journey of relationships. Mark shares his personal experience of going through Relationship 1.0 and 2.0 with his partner. They also touch on the considerations in deciding whether to stay or go in a relationship, the hierarchy of ideal relationship structures, the importance of being well-resourced in relationships, the significance of freedom in relationships, and much more. Mark Groves is a Human Connection Specialist, founder of Create the Love, host of the Mark Groves Podcast and co-author of Liberated Love. Mark's work bridges the academic and the human, inviting people to explore the good, the bad, the downright ugly, and the beautiful sides of connection. Preorder Liberated Love here! Mark's Website: createthelove.com + markgroves.com Mark's Podcast: markgrovespodcast.com Mark's Instagram: @createthelove Follow John on Instagram @theangrytherapist or click HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John gives us a list of unhealthy behaviors we mistake for love in dating and our relationships. He talks about why we're attracted to unhealthy behavior, and does a deep dive on how we might exhibit some of these behaviors in current or past relationships without realizing it. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about the challenges people face when they stay in a relationship after infidelity. He encourages people who are in this situation to ask themselves a very important question: why are you staying in this relationship? Especially when there hasn't been any growth, or change on the other person's end. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks to James Rhee about his journey as a Korean American and experiences in leadership. James explains his philosophy of kindness in math, how he designs systems that reward true agency, the importance of joy and finding contentment in everyday moments, the significance of championing Asian-Americans in media, and the positive changes happening in representation. James Rhee is a high school teacher turned private equity investor and CEO. James’ leadership story first grabbed global attention during his unlikely seven-year tenure as Chairman and first-time CEO at fashion retailer Ashley Stewart. After his radical approach fueled a transcendent comeback story for the company, James concretized his leadership philosophy—kindness plus a little math—in the form of red helicopter, his media-education platform. A graduate of Harvard Law School, he is now a Senior Lecturer at Duke Law School and MIT Sloan School of Management and the Johnson Chair of Entrepreneurship at Howard University—the first joint appointment of its kind in history. His TED Talk and Dare to Lead interview with Brené Brown have captured the imagination of millions. He is the author of red helicopter (HarperOne; April 9, 2024). Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this exciting episode, John hosts a panel with the speakers for the upcoming In Bloom: A Love and Relationships Summit. They talk about everything love and relationships including artificial intimacy, sex as a cultural and relational issue, emotional availability, and the practice of interdependence. The conversation also touches on communication in relationships, the challenges of navigating different attachment styles, the importance of understanding and empathy in relationships, rather than labeling and blaming, and much more. In Bloom: A Love and Relationships Summit April 12-14, 2024 Fairmont Waterfront Hotel, Vancouver BC (virtual attendance is also available) Featuring Dr. Gabor Maté, Rae Maté, Logan Ury, Dené Logan, Shaun Galanos, Dr. Jess O'Reilly, Dr. Jody Carrington, John Kim, Vanessa Bennett, Todd Baratz, and Sophie Grégoire Trudeau. Take your relational skills to the next level. Real Love Ready is putting you in the room with your favourite relationship experts—and the most trusted names in love—for a weekend of learning, growth, and community. Use the discount code INBLOOM25 for 25% off in person and virtual. SIGN UP HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John shares his thoughts on the twenty things every man should have or have done by age forty. He covers a wide range of topics including: finding purpose, developing personal style, maintaining good credit, experiencing heartbreak, expressing love for other men, setting boundaries with parents, saving and investing, practicing forgiveness, experiencing rebirth, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks with Keila and Joe about their relationship history, communication issues, and recent conflicts. They also talk about the baggage from past relationships, the challenges of feeling safe and secure, external stressors, different social lives, and the pressure to be everything for each other. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how complicated the aftermath of cheating is. He talks about the importance of not taking things personally, forgiveness if you want to repair the relationship, why people cheat, how to heal if you've been cheated on, and more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John reflects on his personal growth journey through social media and the power of documenting one's story. He shares how he found his voice and embodied his potential through podcasting. He also emphasizes the significance of dreaming and staying curious throughout life. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks to Annie Undone about monogamous vs non-monogamous relationships. They talks about what non-monogamy is, what is looks like in a romantic relationship, what judgements surround non-monogamy, debunk myths about non-monogamy, how to be in a healthy non-monogamous relationships, and more. Annie is an artist and writer working to normalize diverse relationship styles and varied sexual experiences. She is a queer, kinky, relationship anarchist on a mission to incite individuals to experience personal revolutions. Annie has explored a variety of relationship styles, and is currently continuing her journey of self discovery. She has wide experiential knowledge in non-monogamy, kink, and exploring healthy relationship dynamics. You can learn more about Annie and her services HERE or follow her on Instagram HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John answers all of Vanity Fair's Proust questions, and does a deep with each answer. He shares vulnerable moments of his life by talking about his childhood, happiness and fears, his current state of mind and struggles, occasional lies he's told, and more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John brings back the hosts of "Guys We Fucked," Corinne Fisher and Christina Hutchinson, to discuss the lasting influence of childhood on adult life, emotional vampires, the necessity of solitude for creativity, and their positive outlook on aging. They also delve into how childhood experiences shape self-worth and emotional health, with personal anecdotes about family dynamics, and more. You can find out more about Guys We F*cked HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this emotional episode, John and his retreat members get vulnerable and share their experience attending March's Miserable F*cks Retreat. They dive into why they decided to attend this month's retreat, what fears they have going through with experience with strangers, what feelings were brought up that they had to work through, and much more. Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John talks with Zach Watson to discuss the topic of mental load and domestic labor distribution. They explore the challenges and controversies surrounding this topic, particularly in relation to men's responses. They also touch upon the influence of a capitalist society on the perception of value, and conclude with a discussion on the role of humor and playfulness in changing the conversation among men and the struggle with ego and humility in personal growth. You can book a call with Zachary HERE or follow him on Instagram HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John does a live podcast with Nicole LePera (The Holistic Psychologist) where they talk about breaking old patterns and generational cycles, how to open your heart to yourself and others, what manifestation really is, getting in touch with our nervous systems, finding peace within ourselves, having empathy for our parents, masculine and feminine energy, Nicole's new book "How To Be The Love You Seek," and more. You can purchase Nicole's book here: https://howtobetheloveyouseek.com/ Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being. Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John discusses the importance of embracing singleness as a time for personal growth and self-discovery. He challenges the notion that everything in life needs to be figured out and emphasizes the value of exploring oneself during periods of singleness. He also highlights the misconception that happiness is dependent on being in a relationship and encourages individuals to redefine their concepts of singlehood. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being. Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices