The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

For those of us with childhood trauma, this is what can hurt relationships the most: We get overwhelmed and emotionally dysregulated, and with anger growing more and more intense, we explode. That’s lashing out. There’s another way to release the intensity, without abandoning your true feelings. In this video, I teach you what's going on when that happens, along with strategies you can use *in the moment* to maintain your calm and express yourself in a better way. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

One way you can get deeply hurt in a relationship is when you SEE the red flags in your partner's behavior, but instead of confronting them, you gaslight yourself: This means going into denial, justifying your partner's mistreatment of you, or distorting the truth of the situation. Why do we do this In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos from people I've called-out for the red flags in their relationships, and their self-gaslighting. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

There are SOME people, some situations, that shut down your common sense. You can be going along doing pretty well, you’re seeing life clearly, you’re moving forward, your judgment is good. And then that ONE person comes along and it’s like they cast a spell on you. They make you crazy with weird signs that something’s not right. And instead of thinking clearly, your mind stops working, and you go into denial. Now I’m not a therapist, but I’m someone who’s recovered from getting into relationships with someone who was lying to me, and I help other people get clear and get OUT too. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Evangeline, and she writes. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

When you grew up neglected, abandoned, and with none of your needs met – you may be likely to fall in love with people who are unable to provide the solid, caring love that you need and crave. And at the same time, the wounds of neglect drive you to cling to them, even after it's clear they're unstable, emotionally unavailable, or not safe to be near you. This is the critical juncture where trauma in one generation, can HOP over into the next – when your own trauma BINDS you to people who make you FEEL like something is happening, but who will bring nothing but grief into your life. Now as you know, I’m not a therapist. I’m someone who healed from my own destructive relationship patterns, and here to help you when magical thinking has convinced you that the terrible pain you’re in because of someone you’ve dated is a SIGN that they are the one for you. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Kristin. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

A “People Pleaser” is someone who abandons their authentic response to other people during their interactions – who abandons their own choices of what to do, what to say, and what to BE, opting instead to try to guess what other people want. It's a leftover symptom of early trauma, but can block your healing. Do you know someone like this, or do you find yourself people-pleasing others? In this video, I unpack why people-pleasers end up broke, alone and resentful, and what you can do to break the cycle. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

To avoid responsibility for their own actions, abusive parents sometimes make one child into a scapegoat, and siblings follow suit. The person scapegoated suffers horribly, but getting pushed out of the family sometimes means they demonstrate more strength and success in life than those who we kept in the family fold. In this 4-video compilation, I respond to letters from people working to heal the wounds of this terrible form of emotional abuse. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Participating in a recovery program is a powerful way to get support and change your life. In any group -- in person or online -- there's always some risk that someone will be inappropriate or cross boundaries, especially when everyone in the group is there *because* they struggle. It's not uncommon in meetings that one person takes a romantic interest in someone they meet there, and sometimes the feelings are not mutual. In this video, I respond to a letter who feels stalked by a fellow member who won't take “no thank you" for an answer, and now is hiding his identity and lurking in online meetings where she attends. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Some people are deeply confused about what’s appropriate to say and do around their kids. When parents are unboundaried like that, walking around undressed, raging, getting emotional, talking about exploits, it makes kids feel scared again and again, putting them at risk to develop Complex PTSD, and robbing them of a sense of safety in the world. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman whose "ick" triggers from her parents' behaviors are blocking her ability to love. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

If your life energy is strongly concentrated on another person and their dysfunctional behavior... and you believe you'd be happy if you could just make them change...and they haven't changed... and you fight about it -- *you* have a problem. Maybe they have a problem too, but *your* problem is that you’ve surrendered all your power to a person who is actually not acceptable to you. That is what codependency is. And If you don’t know the signs, I’ve got 20 of them to teach in this video. Signs You Are in a Codependent Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3pwt5c6 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Many people affected by early trauma work HARD to heal, but don't get results. If you're ready to move forward and you're prepared to make changes that make healing easier, you'll want to hear this 4-video compilation where I share my best trauma healing tips. Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JrPdvx 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Limerence is an addiction-level romantic obsession with someone you can’t have. It can get so bad that you're checking out of reality, isolating and fantasizing that the person you love loves you back. It’s common in people who were emotionally neglected as kids, and it can rob you of any chance of truly loving someone and being loved in your life, because limerence takes up that space where anyone real, could really be with you. In this video, I respond to a follow-up letter from a man who wrote to me last year, immobilized with limerence. Now, his life is healing, and he shares how he did it. The first letter from Daniel, "How Shame Drives You to Obsess on Someone You Can't Have": https://youtu.be/9XjJFLThpRw Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Hardly anyone understands this, but when you spend your life pursuing people who aren’t into you and won’t commit to you – guess who’s the avoidant? You are. Even though you’re devastated when they reject you and you pine away for them after it’s over, there’s something about the way you *know* it can never work out that sets you free to love without reservation. You can love deeply, but keep your options open, and never feel trapped. But you'll always feel grief, which may be wearing like a cozy blanket that keeps the cold wind of actual *choices* in your life away from you. *That* is avoidance. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who has done this for years, but now, the possibility of real love has appeared in her life. How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

So many people are walking through life WANTING to solve problems of connection, and purpose and productivity and TRYING to do it. And they don’t even realize they’re doing this! But they’re holding their lives – and especially the PEOPLE in their lives – at arm's length. This is what I call “covert avoidance.” You LOOK like you’re engaged deeply with your life, but really? You’re distracted, you’re making plans and then canceling them, you’re setting goals and then wiping them from your mind, and you’re not being present for the people who are in your life – so everything stays shallow… Nothing goes anywhere. And you probably don’t even realize you’re doing it. In this video, I describe this common but hidden trauma symptom and teach you strategies to gently get free and connect once again with people and your life. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

If you want a loving, committed relationship, you may be undermining that by having no-love, no-commitment FWB relationships. You may have been conditioned to believe that filling your time with meaningless s*x was OK, until magically, the love of your life comes along -- that you could just ditch the empty relationship at that time, and happiness would follow. In this 4-video compilation, I share some of my most popular videos about the ways past trauma (and especially neglect in childhood) can leave you feeling ashamed and exhausted when it comes to needing love. Learn how to stop accepting crumbs and discover the powerful change that can take place immediately, making it possible for real love to find you at last. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

It doesn’t matter what your avoidant partner tells you: If they are giving you the silent treatment – storming out, going AWOL for days or weeks at a time with no explanation, they are emotionally abusing you. And if you’re left feeling obsessed and frantic for little crumbs of communicaiton, I’m sending you a lifeline, to tell you – your trauma wounds have been activated, and from here on out, it’s going to be VERY hard to find any peace or happiness, unless the whole dynamic of your relationship changes. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who wants advice on how she can convince her partner. 10 Things Romantic Manipulators Say: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3ZcUnkm 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

A pathological narcissist makes you feel like the most special person in the world, and then the next day, will discard you for the tiniest of reasons – and then they blame you. If you grew up with parents who sometimes cared for you and sometimes forgot about you – or blamed you, you may be especially vulnerable to this dizzy cycle with partners who idealize you, become emotionally abusive, and then throw you away. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who wants help understanding what happened, and how she can stop repeating this trauma-driven behavior. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

People talk a lot about being "trauma bonded" but most don't know what it means. They mistakenly think it’s when two traumatized people form a bond because they have that shared experience of trauma. And that happens, but that’s not what it means to be “trauma bonded.” In fact, the truth is much worse. Is this happening to you? In this video, I explain how trauma bonds develop, what the signs are that it's happening, and how to break free. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Here’s the hard truth about trauma: Some of the things you didn’t get as a child, can’t be fixed directly. We can’t go back in time. We can’t be children again to receive the proper love and care we needed then. And we can’t save people we lost. But those of us with CPTSD CAN learn to fill our lives with love and support NOW, and start working on the triggers, and the distorted thinking, and the self-defeating behaviors that are the natural byproduct of trauma in your childhood. When you do, it changes your thinking, your relationships, and your capacity to recognize red-flag people (vs people who can truly love you back). In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about abandonment -- how it can control your life, and what to do to heal. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

You’ve probably heard this: The most common phobia in the world is public speaking. An estimated 75% of people experience anxiety when they have to speak in front of people. When you add a history of trauma into the mix, well – if you watch this channel, you’ve probably experienced it yourself. Speaking in front of groups can be paralyzing. My letter today is from a woman whose fear of public speaking is a huge block to her career and her sense of confidence. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Getting closure after a breakup is a real thing. But too often, people in the grips of heartbreak use the word to justify attempts to reconnect, so they can get another chance to try again to be loved. But the reason they won't just say "I want another chance" is they want “plausible deniability" – they need cover for the fact that they are so obsessed they will tolerate rejection or worse, just to get that second chance. So how do you know when your desire for closure is genuine, and when you’re kidding yourself, so that you can get another shot at love? In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who struggles to accept that the man she loves has left her. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Of all the red flags I’ve learned to detect, there’s one that really makes my “danger” radar go off, and that’s when a grown man or woman says they NEVER want to grow up. What does that mean? In the people I’ve known, it means they don’t have their shit together – and they’re pretending that there’s this FUN reason why. In this video, I teach the signs that childhood trauma has kept aspects of your life stuck -- allowing the child in you to control the adult in you -- and what to do to get your sh** together and live the life that makes you happy and strong. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Your Childhood PTSD symptoms have likely created a lifetime of problems in relationships choosing unavailable people, clinging to bad relationships or avoiding intimacy altogether. But the reason you long for real love -- a "great love" even -- is because you were born to love and be loved. How does a person move past the hurts of the past and learn, at last, to love? How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Limerence is a weapons-grade obsession with other people you can’t actually be with. It blocks you from real love, and holds onto you like an addiction. People say limerence is a projection of who YOU really are, or a projection of the divine – but sometimes I think that toxic cloud of limerence might be generated by the ABSENCE left by your parents’ failure to truly see or love you. In this video I respond to a letter from a man who grew up in a family paralyzed by shame; now he's struggling to form a romantic relationship. The Signs of Limerence: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3PbqblT 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Many of you have been telling me you’re struggling with a feeling of emptiness right now, especially during the holidays. One person described it as a mix of sadness and "What's the point?" Maybe you're feeling depressed or lost, or as if things have gotten so bad that there just isn't any good in the world anymore. But there is good. It's all around us, even in the darkest moments, and I'll show you a ten-minute guided relaxation exercise that will allow you to connect that spirit of good, and instantly change how you see the world... 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

This is one of the WORST aspects of living with the effects of early trauma: You keep losing friends, but you don’t know why. If you were abused or neglected in childhood, I can almost guarantee you’ve had more than your share of ruined friendships. That’s what trauma in childhood so often does to us, long term it injures our ability to connect with other people -- for several reasons. You’ve probably been aware for a long time that connection is hard for you sometimes. And this is a terrible way to go through life, robbed of the most important things that make life happy -- love, belonging, people being there for you – a tribe. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Abuse and neglect in childhood can leave you with the conviction that everywhere you go, YOU are responsible for everyone’s feelings. If your family is miserable, you spend all YOUR energy trying to make them happy. If they’re angry, you try to help them see the bright side of things. If they start fighting with each other, you ruin your own peace by trying to be a peacemaker for people who don't want peace. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who needs a way out of tense and draining family gatherings. Are You Dysregulated? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JwTn5r 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Almost everyone who writes to me here at Crappy Childhood Fairy was not SEEN or UNDERSTOOD by the people who raised them. Whether it was neglect or addiction or mental illness or death, that loss of the attention you needed, in order to have a center, to know who you even are – can create years and even decades of empty relationships and a painful quest for real love – even as you block that from happening by attaching to people who CAN’T love you. In this relationship, it’s for one reason. In the next one, it’s for some other reason. But you still long for love. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who's getting up the courage to face the truth about her relationship pattern. How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

You can SET boundaries. But You can't make people respect them. Shocking, right? We’ve all tried to make other people be who we want them to be but if the other person is not inclined, it’s exhausting to try to make them comply. Some people are aligned with us and they’re going to cooperate with us anyway. It’s the ones who are not aligned with us, where everything gets jammed up. Because these people are not interested in our boundaries. In this video, I'll teach you what a boundary is, and what to do if people don't respect them. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Neglect by a parent (or the loss of them) can leave an emotional wound on a child that affects them all their lives. How many times have you fallen for someone, only to find that you weren’t valued, your existence was kept secret from someone's "real" partner, relegating you to the status of "side chick?" The consequences of this pattern don’t just draw you to the wrong person; the pattern leads to behaviors that drive away good people who would otherwise seek a relationship with you. In this four-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about childhood trauma and the attraction to unavailable people. Learn how it happens, and what you can do to heal. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

The first months of a romantic relationship can feel like there’s a sweetness that moves through everything in your life.. like all your problems have been solved -- especially when you’ve been alone a long time. But soon, things aren't so perfect, and each person's flaws are revealed. This is when you need to know the signs of whether someone is truly a good match, and if both of you are ready for actual love. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who sees signs of trouble, and needs to know if this means the end. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Past trauma is almost always a factor among people who find themselves in the s*x industry; in recovery, many people leave this line of work and start their lives fresh. But what happens when it's time to date? In this video, I respond to a letter from a former stripper who would like to form a relationship with a good man, but worries that telling him too early -- or not at all -- could end up sabotaging their future. Ten Signs Your Trauma Is Healing: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3raZghI 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Most experts don't talk about this, but there's a very real phenomenon in the world that is commonly known as Evil. And while it's not scientific, it's recognized in all peoples, all countries, across history. It's metaphysical, but shows up tangibly in the form of abuse and neglect of children. We don't want to risk passing on the evil that was done to us: In this video, I share with you one of my most powerful videos, about the evil nature of abuse, and why healing is necessary on multiple levels. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

It’s common in our culture for people to sleep together almost as soon as they meet. And people act like that’s fun and easy, and only foolish people can’t handle it, or think it should be avoided, in favor of something better. So for people who grew up neglected and abused, there’s a contradiction – their attachment wound is crying for someone to love them and STAY and not leave, but the culture of casual sex tells them this is too much to expect. In this video, I share four of my most popular videos, where I respond to letters from people who were neglected in childhood. Learn the common signs that neglect is driving self-sabotaging relationship choices, and steps you can take to heal. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Children are brilliant at rationalizing how a parent could simultaneously LOVE them, but also hurt, punish and abandon them. As children we had to make it all fit in our minds but if you’re STILL doing this as an adult – and a lot of us get stuck in that pattern – you may have gotten stuck in "cognitive dissonance. "That’s the psychology term for the mental disturbance and stress you feel when you vaguely realize that what you’re experiencing – and the story you TELL yourself about what you’re experiencing -- don’t line up at all. Like someone is treating you horribly and making your life miserable, and YOU keep finding ways to believe it’s the best relationship ever. But when you’re IN cognitive dissonance, it can be hard to think clearly, or take sane action to protect yourself. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is describing a horrible relationship, and struggling to see that it's a horrible relationship. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

A huge problem for many of us with CPTSD (definitely for me) is that we end up with too many MEAN people in our lives. These can be friends, relatives, co-workers, relatives, neighbors, bosses and partners. They criticize you, they ridicule you, they ostracize you, underestimate you and they say terrible things about you that turn people against you. It may feel like you have no control over how you get treated. And while you might complain about their terrible treatment of you, you may need to do more to change your pattern. In this video, I talk about the reasons people who had abuse and neglect in childhood may be surrounded by mean people today -- and what you can do to heal. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

There’s this trauma-driven behavior where you go through life without ever quite investing in permanent or even long-term things -- relationships, jobs, groups you belong to and even your own home may all feel like a stepping stone, a rest stop – a temporary thing. And a lot of us who lived through abuse and neglect in childhood have been walking around like this, thinking it was a personal failure of some kind. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Marti, and she's trying to break through this weird but common trauma symptom. Ten Signs Your Trauma Is Healing: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3raZghI 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Growing up in a chaotic and dysfunctional family can leave you with a wounded ability to connect. And while some traumatized people respond to things that trigger connection wounds by clinging to relationships, you might respond by running away. This is AVOIDANCE. And If you've ever fled from a partner, or a friend or family member who cared about you, you know how painful this is -- how intense the need is in the moment, and how terrible it feels later. In this 4-video compilation, I share some of my most popular videos on avoidance, and the signs that it may be blocking your ability to have relationships. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

It’s a no brainer to stay away from people who have betrayed you and drained you of the love you used to feel. But sometimes, there are reasons why you might think twice about returning to someone who’s decidedly NOT the love of your life. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who thinks it may be time to settle down with an ex who mistreated her. 16 CPTSD Behaviors That Sabotage Your Success: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3mmvYdA 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

You might THINK you are ready for real love but if you’re pouring ALL your emotional and romantic energy into someone who is stringing you along, not available, and has been clear they DON’T want a relationship, it’s time to wake up. My letter today is from a woman who is aputting a giant wall between herself and the possibility of love. How to Tell if Someone is Partner Material?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3YBwKkj 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

“Productivity Crash” is a term I made up for a phenomenon I see over and over again, where those of us who lived through trauma as children demonstrate a capacity for huge accomplishments -- but then they're followed by collapses in our ability to focus, be on time, or get anything done. It feels like someone took our batteries out! What is that? I’m bringing back here one of my most popular videos about why our productivity goes up, and then goes DOWN - and what you can do to get off the roller coaster, and function well every day. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

If you grew up with trauma, there's a high probability that you've become emotionally attached to people who bring trouble into your life. Either they are unavailable, not into you, inappropriate, or abusive. But the trouble with childhood PTSD is that it can leave you with a broken "red flag detector." Nervous system changes caused by early abuse and neglect can leave you with difficulty reading the intentions of people you meet, or whether they are safe. In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about the relationship between past trauma and the difficulty many of us experience seeing red flags before we get attached to others -- and what you can do to heal. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Living with your own self-defeating behaviors goes on so long sometimes, that when you even THINK of changing your life, you feel panicked. Many of us see what we need to change before we feel ready to take action. But be careful you don't stay frozen and stuck, waiting until you feel "ready." Soon your future starts to pull on you, drawing you forward, showing you what you must face, whether you feel ready to see it or not. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who grew up with trauma, and now, filled with a mix of hope and anger, is preparing to transform her life. Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JrPdvx 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

It’s a terrible thing when parents ignore and neglect a child for whom attention, love and security are just as important as food and water and oxygen. If you grew up starved for comfort, you may find yourself now, as an adult, trying to make do in relationships where you get almost nothing back. And the hardest part is, you can’t let go. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman whose parents physically and emotionally abandoned her, and now she pines for a man who doesn't care for her at all. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

When you’ve lived through abuse, neglect, bullying, hardship and getting ostracized, it becomes hard to think. Your life gets chaotic. Your feelings overwhelm you. It’s hard to keep track of time or take proper care of yourself. And your space gets cluttered. What your wounded self is craving is *order,* where all the elements of your life can fall into place, into a flow that helps you to mentally and emotionally, function and to physically re-regulate. I’ll show you a simple exercise to get started with gently introducing order in your day, but first, I want to talk about the concept of order, and what it looks like when it’s not working.  Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Your mind plays tricks on you when you fall in love with someone who says flat out they don’t want a relationship. This absent character, present only as an electronic voice or a digital image but never as a real person at your side who loves you -- can be the perfect blank canvas for lament fantasies. “If only we could be together…” that’s what the limerent thinks, never doing the math to understand that the person clearly, openly strongly tells you that will never happen. In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos where I answer letters from people struggling with obsessive love and limerence. The Signs of Limerence: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3PbqblT 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

It’s easy to think that when a period of intense trauma in your life is over, you should be fine. But the trouble is, AFTER traumatic experiences you can be extremely vulnerable, not just to people who want to manipulate you, but to your own, trauma-driven pattern of self-deception. Healing takes time, and sometimes the gravity of your mistakes becomes real to you later. In this video, I respond to a woman searching for ways to overcome the guilt she feels in the aftermath of an affair. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Everybody loves transformation stories where someone has a horrible life of struggle and addiction and trauma – and then ONE good thing happens and EVERYTHING is happy ever after. It sounds good on social media but does not help those of us who are trying to FREE ourselves from the trauma-driven problems of the past. In reality, the wounds of trauma are still there even after you begin changing your life. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who has worked hard to heal but feels lonely, hopeless, sad and angry. You might benefit from hearing my advice. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

Trauma during childhood can teach you to "give away your power" through self-destructive tendencies, people pleasing, and an urge to flee conflict, responsibility, and intimacy. To heal trauma, you need your POWER. Here, I share a hugely popular video from my archives on the steps to take to build the stamina, resilience and insight needed to sustain the work of healing Childhood PTSD. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

When we're talking about trauma, a "trigger" is a stimulus that sets off Childhood PTSD symptoms -- in particular, dysregulation. In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos about common - but often overlooked -- triggers that YOU may be experiencing now. When you learn to calm your triggers, your life gets freer and more choices are open to you. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF  

If your heart's desire is to marry a man and have children but you keep dating men who don't want quite the same thing, it helps to get VERY clear about what you want and to change the way you date. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who has been sabotaging what she really wants in long-term relationships that can't bring her the future she seeks. Hear my clear advice for how to change the pattern and date in a way that supports the creation of the lasting, committed love and family want. Heal trauma-driven patterns and find real love at last: http://bit.ly/3IBbrv7 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF