
The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle
601 episodes — Page 5 of 13

Is He the One Who Can’t Do Intimacy? Or Are YOU?
Being avoidant in relationships isn’t just the obvious stuff – they won’t commit, they blow hot and cold, they ghost you when you try to talk about commitment. You might not realize this, but if you have a PATTERN of falling for people like this, YOU are avoiding intimacy just as much, but in your own way. In this video I respond to a letter from a woman who is navigating a relationship where two people who can't get close fall madly in love! Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What to Do When Compulsive Lying is Destroying Your Life
Nothing good can come from relationships built on lies. You can tell yourself that you lie because you don’t want to hurt the other person. You can tell yourself you lie because something bad happened to you when you were a kid. And you can put all kinds of psychological jargon on it. But if you keep doing it, it will wreck everything in your life, and seriously harm others around you. So the question is, how far are you willing to go to STOP the lies? My letter today is from a man I’ll call Artie, and he writes. 16 CPTSD Behaviors That Sabotage Your Success: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3mmvYdA 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Here's How to Tell If Your Nervous System is Dysregulated
The core symptom of early trauma is neurological dysregulation, and it drives almost every other CPTSD symptom (or makes it worse). In this video, I explain what dysregulation is, what it feels like, and how you can support trauma healing powerfully by learning to re-regulate quickly, and stay regulated more of the time. Doing this can help you feel calmer and more focused, and increase your success in healing. Learn Quick Measures to Get Re-Regulated: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3YBrIVg 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Strategies for People With Trauma to Succeed
Work and career are important to success and happiness. But trauma from your childhood can trigger behaviors that block your advancement and ruin opportunities. In this 4-video compilation, I teach how common trauma-driven behaviors can hurt your work life, and how you can stop the self-sabotage, manage your symptoms and thrive in your career. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to Escape Emotional Manipulation Before It’s Too Late
People who were traumatized in the past can be easy targets for people seeking CONTROL. Has this happened to you? If your sense of self is not yet strong, it's easy to fall under the spell of someone who will TELL you who you are. They’ll what you should do and if you push back, they will punish you. This is narcissistic abuse. It’s emotional manipulation. And it's how people can be "brainwashed" to believe anything. In this video, I reply to a letter from a woman with a controlling boyfriend, who is desperate for advice. But can she hear it? 10 Things Romantic Manipulators Say: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3ZcUnkm 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to Set Boundaries with a Sibling with CPTSD
When someone is wounded by trauma in childhood, it can SEEM to them that other people should be able to make them feel better. They may believe that if only you cared enough, or validated their feelings enough, their loneliness and hurt would go away. This is a lot of pressure, and a projection that you can't actually fix for them. It's hard to be compassionate with someone who is hurting, and yet say NO to their demands that you keep listening, keep giving, and keep taking responsibility for their healing. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is fed up with a sibling's venting and emotional hounding. Hear my advice for how to set boundaries with a sibling with CPTSD. Difficult People in Your Life? Try These NINJA BOUNDARIES: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3YCnpZJ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Signs That Early Trauma Affects You Now
Complex PTSD (CPTSD) is a cluster of symptoms that can result from chronic, intense, ongoing trauma, usually during childhood. The symptoms include poor mental focus and procrastination, emotional dysregulation, chronic health problems and a haunting sense of disconnection from other people. It can be a huge relief to discover these symptoms have a name. And once you know the signs, you can get to work on healing. In this video, I teach 12 signs that early trauma may be affecting you now. Share in the comments which ones you've noticed in yourself. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Recognizing and Escaping Toxic Friendships (4-Video Compilation)
Most people won't tolerate mistreatment from friends. But if you grew up with abusive or neglectful parents, you may have been conditioned to hang on for life to toxic friends, no matter what. In this four-video compilation of some of my most popular videos, I respond to letters from people whose connection wounds are keeping them trapped in toxic friendships. Instead of leaving, they are giving in to the trauma-driven tendency to blame themselves for their friend's bad behavior. Hear my advice about when to leave, and how to heal afterward. 16 CPTSD Behaviors That Sabotage Your Success: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3mmvYdA 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Why You Second-Guess Yourself in When Their Bad Behavior Is Obvious
If you were betrayed in childhood by the adults you trusted, your self-esteem and boundaries can be so wounded, that you become “betrayal blind.” You can SEE you’re getting SO much LESS than you need and deserve in a relationship, but because you can’t face ending things, you UNSEE it. This is self-deception, and we are motivated to disbelieve what we see because the need for love is SO strong, and facing the truth, means the crumbs of love you’re getting will be lost – and that feels impossible. So what can you do? in this video, I respond to a woman who is RIGHT on the verge of facing the truth about her boyfriend – but she’s tempted to believe she’s just being paranoid. Is she tripping? See what YOU think. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How Dismissive Parenting Creates Lifelong Problems in Relationships (and How to Heal)
When you were a child you needed the attention of parents – not just for food and shelter, but for your emotions. You need them to recognize and see when you were struggling, and help you navigate relationships, stand up for yourself, and set boundaries. That's what parenting IS. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who was raised by dismissive parents, who invalidated her needs and prioritized their own activities and preferences. Now she is with a dismissive partner, and worse, she has grown to be dismissive of HERSELF. Hear her letter and my response. Difficult People in Your Life? Try These NINJA BOUNDARIES: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3YCnpZJ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Why You’re Hiding Your True Self (and 40 Ways to Break Free)
Being around people, especially if you grew up with trauma, can feel stressful, trigger-y, and dysregulating. People can be mean, they judge you and they make you feel left out, like you don’t belong. For many of us, this started when we were in our own families when we were small. Did this happen to you? The coping mechanism you might have used was Self-Suppression -- playing small and trying to protect yourself by not being really YOU. Learn 40 ways YOU might be doing this. These behaviors are incredibly common and they will hold you back. Get something to write on, because in this video I'm going to tell you how to get free. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What to Do When Social Interactions Overwhelm You (4-Video Compilation)
There’s an almost universal symptom that people who grew up with trauma will tend to exhibit - and it’s a sense of disconnection. And even though you crave social connection, trauma often comes with "people triggers" that make interactions stressful and dysregulating for you. When you're feeling triggered by people, shutting them out feels like it's the right, best, most self-caring thing you can do. But when you do it long term it can bring unhappiness to every area of your life. In this 4-video compilation, I teach why people with early find socializing so disabling, and what you can do to feel more ease and comfort in social situations. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Why You Can’t Stop Craving Love From People You Can’t Have
There is a huge connection between abuse and neglect – especially emotional neglect in childhood – and a painful pattern in adulthood of pouring all the love in your heart into the IDEA of someone you can’t have. The word for this is limerence. And as much as this is a painful and lonely maladaptation of our very human need for love – there’s something tender and beautiful about this too. I used to think limerence was something shameful and crazy, until I received this extraordinary letter from a woman a few years ago called Sofia, which I wanted to share with you in this video that was much beloved by my viewers at the time. Tell me in the comments what YOU think. Ten Signs Your Trauma Is Healing: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3raZghI 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to Detach When Your Feelings Go TOO FAR
Not every obsessive relationship is a romance. Sometimes it’s a friendship that gets through the cracks of the neglect you grew up with in childhood, and it becomes HUGE In your mind. You think about them, you want them to approve of you, you want them to unconditionally love and support you in all circumstances, all the time – (which is a clue, by the way, this is an unmet need from your childhood that’s leaked out onto an unsuspecting friend. Things come to a head when reality hits, and either you’ll see how your attachment wounds have been running the show and course correct – or fall deeper into helplessness and obsession. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is jeopardizing a friendship by expecting too much. 16 CPTSD Behaviors That Sabotage Your Success: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3mmvYdA 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

10 Emotional Regulation Strategies for Everyday Life
For those of us with childhood trauma, this is what can hurt relationships the most: We get overwhelmed and emotionally dysregulated, and with anger growing more and more intense, we explode. That’s lashing out. There’s another way to release the intensity, without abandoning your true feelings. In this video, I teach you what's going on when that happens, along with strategies you can use *in the moment* to maintain your calm and express yourself in a better way. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

These Red Flags Mean Walk Away! (4-Video Compilation)
One way you can get deeply hurt in a relationship is when you SEE the red flags in your partner's behavior, but instead of confronting them, you gaslight yourself: This means going into denial, justifying your partner's mistreatment of you, or distorting the truth of the situation. Why do we do this In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos from people I've called-out for the red flags in their relationships, and their self-gaslighting. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What to Do When You Think Your Partner is Lying
There are SOME people, some situations, that shut down your common sense. You can be going along doing pretty well, you’re seeing life clearly, you’re moving forward, your judgment is good. And then that ONE person comes along and it’s like they cast a spell on you. They make you crazy with weird signs that something’s not right. And instead of thinking clearly, your mind stops working, and you go into denial. Now I’m not a therapist, but I’m someone who’s recovered from getting into relationships with someone who was lying to me, and I help other people get clear and get OUT too. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Evangeline, and she writes. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Childhood Neglect & The Urge to Abandon Yourself Around Bad People
When you grew up neglected, abandoned, and with none of your needs met – you may be likely to fall in love with people who are unable to provide the solid, caring love that you need and crave. And at the same time, the wounds of neglect drive you to cling to them, even after it's clear they're unstable, emotionally unavailable, or not safe to be near you. This is the critical juncture where trauma in one generation, can HOP over into the next – when your own trauma BINDS you to people who make you FEEL like something is happening, but who will bring nothing but grief into your life. Now as you know, I’m not a therapist. I’m someone who healed from my own destructive relationship patterns, and here to help you when magical thinking has convinced you that the terrible pain you’re in because of someone you’ve dated is a SIGN that they are the one for you. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Kristin. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Pretending to Be "Nice" is Manipulation (And It Won't Work)
A “People Pleaser” is someone who abandons their authentic response to other people during their interactions – who abandons their own choices of what to do, what to say, and what to BE, opting instead to try to guess what other people want. It's a leftover symptom of early trauma, but can block your healing. Do you know someone like this, or do you find yourself people-pleasing others? In this video, I unpack why people-pleasers end up broke, alone and resentful, and what you can do to break the cycle. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Healing From The Scapegoat Experience (4-Video Compilation)
To avoid responsibility for their own actions, abusive parents sometimes make one child into a scapegoat, and siblings follow suit. The person scapegoated suffers horribly, but getting pushed out of the family sometimes means they demonstrate more strength and success in life than those who we kept in the family fold. In this 4-video compilation, I respond to letters from people working to heal the wounds of this terrible form of emotional abuse. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What To Do When Someone Makes You Feel Creeped Out
Participating in a recovery program is a powerful way to get support and change your life. In any group -- in person or online -- there's always some risk that someone will be inappropriate or cross boundaries, especially when everyone in the group is there *because* they struggle. It's not uncommon in meetings that one person takes a romantic interest in someone they meet there, and sometimes the feelings are not mutual. In this video, I respond to a letter who feels stalked by a fellow member who won't take “no thank you" for an answer, and now is hiding his identity and lurking in online meetings where she attends. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How To Heal Hypervigilance From Parents’ Creepy S*x Behaviors
Some people are deeply confused about what’s appropriate to say and do around their kids. When parents are unboundaried like that, walking around undressed, raging, getting emotional, talking about exploits, it makes kids feel scared again and again, putting them at risk to develop Complex PTSD, and robbing them of a sense of safety in the world. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman whose "ick" triggers from her parents' behaviors are blocking her ability to love. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

20 Signs You’re In a Codependent Relationship
If your life energy is strongly concentrated on another person and their dysfunctional behavior... and you believe you'd be happy if you could just make them change...and they haven't changed... and you fight about it -- *you* have a problem. Maybe they have a problem too, but *your* problem is that you’ve surrendered all your power to a person who is actually not acceptable to you. That is what codependency is. And If you don’t know the signs, I’ve got 20 of them to teach in this video. Signs You Are in a Codependent Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3pwt5c6 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Break Free from Childhood Trauma Faster (4-Video Compilation)
Many people affected by early trauma work HARD to heal, but don't get results. If you're ready to move forward and you're prepared to make changes that make healing easier, you'll want to hear this 4-video compilation where I share my best trauma healing tips. Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JrPdvx 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Get Out of Romantic Obsession And Open Your Life to Real Love
Limerence is an addiction-level romantic obsession with someone you can’t have. It can get so bad that you're checking out of reality, isolating and fantasizing that the person you love loves you back. It’s common in people who were emotionally neglected as kids, and it can rob you of any chance of truly loving someone and being loved in your life, because limerence takes up that space where anyone real, could really be with you. In this video, I respond to a follow-up letter from a man who wrote to me last year, immobilized with limerence. Now, his life is healing, and he shares how he did it. The first letter from Daniel, "How Shame Drives You to Obsess on Someone You Can't Have": https://youtu.be/9XjJFLThpRw Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What to Do When You Feel Like Running Away
Hardly anyone understands this, but when you spend your life pursuing people who aren’t into you and won’t commit to you – guess who’s the avoidant? You are. Even though you’re devastated when they reject you and you pine away for them after it’s over, there’s something about the way you *know* it can never work out that sets you free to love without reservation. You can love deeply, but keep your options open, and never feel trapped. But you'll always feel grief, which may be wearing like a cozy blanket that keeps the cold wind of actual *choices* in your life away from you. *That* is avoidance. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who has done this for years, but now, the possibility of real love has appeared in her life. How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to Spot and Heal Covert Avoidance
So many people are walking through life WANTING to solve problems of connection, and purpose and productivity and TRYING to do it. And they don’t even realize they’re doing this! But they’re holding their lives – and especially the PEOPLE in their lives – at arm's length. This is what I call “covert avoidance.” You LOOK like you’re engaged deeply with your life, but really? You’re distracted, you’re making plans and then canceling them, you’re setting goals and then wiping them from your mind, and you’re not being present for the people who are in your life – so everything stays shallow… Nothing goes anywhere. And you probably don’t even realize you’re doing it. In this video, I describe this common but hidden trauma symptom and teach you strategies to gently get free and connect once again with people and your life. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

A Few Crumbs of Love Will Never Be Enough
If you want a loving, committed relationship, you may be undermining that by having no-love, no-commitment FWB relationships. You may have been conditioned to believe that filling your time with meaningless s*x was OK, until magically, the love of your life comes along -- that you could just ditch the empty relationship at that time, and happiness would follow. In this 4-video compilation, I share some of my most popular videos about the ways past trauma (and especially neglect in childhood) can leave you feeling ashamed and exhausted when it comes to needing love. Learn how to stop accepting crumbs and discover the powerful change that can take place immediately, making it possible for real love to find you at last. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How You Can Reduce the Emotional Intensity, and Protect Yourself From Abuse
It doesn’t matter what your avoidant partner tells you: If they are giving you the silent treatment – storming out, going AWOL for days or weeks at a time with no explanation, they are emotionally abusing you. And if you’re left feeling obsessed and frantic for little crumbs of communicaiton, I’m sending you a lifeline, to tell you – your trauma wounds have been activated, and from here on out, it’s going to be VERY hard to find any peace or happiness, unless the whole dynamic of your relationship changes. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who wants advice on how she can convince her partner. 10 Things Romantic Manipulators Say: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3ZcUnkm 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to Stop Falling for Partners Who Idealize You (and Then Discard You)
A pathological narcissist makes you feel like the most special person in the world, and then the next day, will discard you for the tiniest of reasons – and then they blame you. If you grew up with parents who sometimes cared for you and sometimes forgot about you – or blamed you, you may be especially vulnerable to this dizzy cycle with partners who idealize you, become emotionally abusive, and then throw you away. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who wants help understanding what happened, and how she can stop repeating this trauma-driven behavior. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

You May Not Realize This Has Already Happened (Until It's Too Late)
People talk a lot about being "trauma bonded" but most don't know what it means. They mistakenly think it’s when two traumatized people form a bond because they have that shared experience of trauma. And that happens, but that’s not what it means to be “trauma bonded.” In fact, the truth is much worse. Is this happening to you? In this video, I explain how trauma bonds develop, what the signs are that it's happening, and how to break free. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What to Do When You Feel Abandoned
Here’s the hard truth about trauma: Some of the things you didn’t get as a child, can’t be fixed directly. We can’t go back in time. We can’t be children again to receive the proper love and care we needed then. And we can’t save people we lost. But those of us with CPTSD CAN learn to fill our lives with love and support NOW, and start working on the triggers, and the distorted thinking, and the self-defeating behaviors that are the natural byproduct of trauma in your childhood. When you do, it changes your thinking, your relationships, and your capacity to recognize red-flag people (vs people who can truly love you back). In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about abandonment -- how it can control your life, and what to do to heal. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Childhood Trauma and the Fear of Speaking in Public
You’ve probably heard this: The most common phobia in the world is public speaking. An estimated 75% of people experience anxiety when they have to speak in front of people. When you add a history of trauma into the mix, well – if you watch this channel, you’ve probably experienced it yourself. Speaking in front of groups can be paralyzing. My letter today is from a woman whose fear of public speaking is a huge block to her career and her sense of confidence. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

When You Reach Out to An Ex, Be Careful You're Not Doing THIS
Getting closure after a breakup is a real thing. But too often, people in the grips of heartbreak use the word to justify attempts to reconnect, so they can get another chance to try again to be loved. But the reason they won't just say "I want another chance" is they want “plausible deniability" – they need cover for the fact that they are so obsessed they will tolerate rejection or worse, just to get that second chance. So how do you know when your desire for closure is genuine, and when you’re kidding yourself, so that you can get another shot at love? In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who struggles to accept that the man she loves has left her. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

It's Time! Here's How to Get Your Sh** Together
Of all the red flags I’ve learned to detect, there’s one that really makes my “danger” radar go off, and that’s when a grown man or woman says they NEVER want to grow up. What does that mean? In the people I’ve known, it means they don’t have their shit together – and they’re pretending that there’s this FUN reason why. In this video, I teach the signs that childhood trauma has kept aspects of your life stuck -- allowing the child in you to control the adult in you -- and what to do to get your sh** together and live the life that makes you happy and strong. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3X9MZ7J 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Stand Up For What Your Soul Knows You Need (4-Video Compilation)
Your Childhood PTSD symptoms have likely created a lifetime of problems in relationships choosing unavailable people, clinging to bad relationships or avoiding intimacy altogether. But the reason you long for real love -- a "great love" even -- is because you were born to love and be loved. How does a person move past the hurts of the past and learn, at last, to love? How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How Shame Drives You to Obsess on Someone You Can't Have
Limerence is a weapons-grade obsession with other people you can’t actually be with. It blocks you from real love, and holds onto you like an addiction. People say limerence is a projection of who YOU really are, or a projection of the divine – but sometimes I think that toxic cloud of limerence might be generated by the ABSENCE left by your parents’ failure to truly see or love you. In this video I respond to a letter from a man who grew up in a family paralyzed by shame; now he's struggling to form a romantic relationship. The Signs of Limerence: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3PbqblT 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Quick Technique to Instantly Change How You See the World
Many of you have been telling me you’re struggling with a feeling of emptiness right now, especially during the holidays. One person described it as a mix of sadness and "What's the point?" Maybe you're feeling depressed or lost, or as if things have gotten so bad that there just isn't any good in the world anymore. But there is good. It's all around us, even in the darkest moments, and I'll show you a ten-minute guided relaxation exercise that will allow you to connect that spirit of good, and instantly change how you see the world... 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

When Friends Push You Away, This Might Be Why
This is one of the WORST aspects of living with the effects of early trauma: You keep losing friends, but you don’t know why. If you were abused or neglected in childhood, I can almost guarantee you’ve had more than your share of ruined friendships. That’s what trauma in childhood so often does to us, long term it injures our ability to connect with other people -- for several reasons. You’ve probably been aware for a long time that connection is hard for you sometimes. And this is a terrible way to go through life, robbed of the most important things that make life happy -- love, belonging, people being there for you – a tribe. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

How to NOT Let Negative People Drag You Down
Abuse and neglect in childhood can leave you with the conviction that everywhere you go, YOU are responsible for everyone’s feelings. If your family is miserable, you spend all YOUR energy trying to make them happy. If they’re angry, you try to help them see the bright side of things. If they start fighting with each other, you ruin your own peace by trying to be a peacemaker for people who don't want peace. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who needs a way out of tense and draining family gatherings. Are You Dysregulated? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JwTn5r 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Why Long Distance, Unavailable People Feel Like Your True Love
Almost everyone who writes to me here at Crappy Childhood Fairy was not SEEN or UNDERSTOOD by the people who raised them. Whether it was neglect or addiction or mental illness or death, that loss of the attention you needed, in order to have a center, to know who you even are – can create years and even decades of empty relationships and a painful quest for real love – even as you block that from happening by attaching to people who CAN’T love you. In this relationship, it’s for one reason. In the next one, it’s for some other reason. But you still long for love. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who's getting up the courage to face the truth about her relationship pattern. How To Prepare For a Great Relationship: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/43SH8aV 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

What To Do When They Keep Ignoring What You Want
You can SET boundaries. But You can't make people respect them. Shocking, right? We’ve all tried to make other people be who we want them to be but if the other person is not inclined, it’s exhausting to try to make them comply. Some people are aligned with us and they’re going to cooperate with us anyway. It’s the ones who are not aligned with us, where everything gets jammed up. Because these people are not interested in our boundaries. In this video, I'll teach you what a boundary is, and what to do if people don't respect them. Do You Struggle to Connect with People?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3LcjDD8 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Why People Neglected in Childhood Don't Get Loved (4-video compilation)
Neglect by a parent (or the loss of them) can leave an emotional wound on a child that affects them all their lives. How many times have you fallen for someone, only to find that you weren’t valued, your existence was kept secret from someone's "real" partner, relegating you to the status of "side chick?" The consequences of this pattern don’t just draw you to the wrong person; the pattern leads to behaviors that drive away good people who would otherwise seek a relationship with you. In this four-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about childhood trauma and the attraction to unavailable people. Learn how it happens, and what you can do to heal. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Look For These Signs and Then Don’t Compromise
The first months of a romantic relationship can feel like there’s a sweetness that moves through everything in your life.. like all your problems have been solved -- especially when you’ve been alone a long time. But soon, things aren't so perfect, and each person's flaws are revealed. This is when you need to know the signs of whether someone is truly a good match, and if both of you are ready for actual love. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who sees signs of trouble, and needs to know if this means the end. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

A Partner Needs to Know About Your Past -- But What If You're Just Dating?
Past trauma is almost always a factor among people who find themselves in the s*x industry; in recovery, many people leave this line of work and start their lives fresh. But what happens when it's time to date? In this video, I respond to a letter from a former stripper who would like to form a relationship with a good man, but worries that telling him too early -- or not at all -- could end up sabotaging their future. Ten Signs Your Trauma Is Healing: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3raZghI 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Trauma Is a Portal Where Evil Gets In, Unless You Fight It
Most experts don't talk about this, but there's a very real phenomenon in the world that is commonly known as Evil. And while it's not scientific, it's recognized in all peoples, all countries, across history. It's metaphysical, but shows up tangibly in the form of abuse and neglect of children. We don't want to risk passing on the evil that was done to us: In this video, I share with you one of my most powerful videos, about the evil nature of abuse, and why healing is necessary on multiple levels. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Neglect in Childhood and Self-Sabotage (4-Video Compilation)
It’s common in our culture for people to sleep together almost as soon as they meet. And people act like that’s fun and easy, and only foolish people can’t handle it, or think it should be avoided, in favor of something better. So for people who grew up neglected and abused, there’s a contradiction – their attachment wound is crying for someone to love them and STAY and not leave, but the culture of casual sex tells them this is too much to expect. In this video, I share four of my most popular videos, where I respond to letters from people who were neglected in childhood. Learn the common signs that neglect is driving self-sabotaging relationship choices, and steps you can take to heal. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your Dating Life? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3EUy8Yh 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Stop Rationalizing the Way You Get Mistreated in Relationships
Children are brilliant at rationalizing how a parent could simultaneously LOVE them, but also hurt, punish and abandon them. As children we had to make it all fit in our minds but if you’re STILL doing this as an adult – and a lot of us get stuck in that pattern – you may have gotten stuck in "cognitive dissonance. "That’s the psychology term for the mental disturbance and stress you feel when you vaguely realize that what you’re experiencing – and the story you TELL yourself about what you’re experiencing -- don’t line up at all. Like someone is treating you horribly and making your life miserable, and YOU keep finding ways to believe it’s the best relationship ever. But when you’re IN cognitive dissonance, it can be hard to think clearly, or take sane action to protect yourself. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is describing a horrible relationship, and struggling to see that it's a horrible relationship. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

Could THIS Be Why SO Many People Treat You Badly?
A huge problem for many of us with CPTSD (definitely for me) is that we end up with too many MEAN people in our lives. These can be friends, relatives, co-workers, relatives, neighbors, bosses and partners. They criticize you, they ridicule you, they ostracize you, underestimate you and they say terrible things about you that turn people against you. It may feel like you have no control over how you get treated. And while you might complain about their terrible treatment of you, you may need to do more to change your pattern. In this video, I talk about the reasons people who had abuse and neglect in childhood may be surrounded by mean people today -- and what you can do to heal. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF

You Can’t Shake the Feeling That Everything is TEMPORARY
There’s this trauma-driven behavior where you go through life without ever quite investing in permanent or even long-term things -- relationships, jobs, groups you belong to and even your own home may all feel like a stepping stone, a rest stop – a temporary thing. And a lot of us who lived through abuse and neglect in childhood have been walking around like this, thinking it was a personal failure of some kind. My letter today is from a woman I’ll call Marti, and she's trying to break through this weird but common trauma symptom. Ten Signs Your Trauma Is Healing: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3raZghI 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership: https://bit.ly/3HP5qcf Send your questions & comments to: [email protected] NEED ONLINE THERAPY? *BetterHelp* can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/CCF