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The Angry Therapist Podcast

The Angry Therapist Podcast

1,103 episodes — Page 3 of 23

Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy | The Map for Messy Honesty

Rapid-fire answers to your biggest honesty hurdles: settling vs. standards, dating vs. marriage mindset, online dating that respects your time, inviting more sex without pressure, and handling rejection like a grown-up. Short, practical, and therapist-backed. Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up ⁠HERE⁠ 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nov 6, 202518 min

Attachment Trauma Series PART 3: Healing Shame: Why Safe Love Feels Scary with Rebecca Prolman

In this part 3 of our Attachment series, therapist Rebecca Prolman joins John Kim to unpack how childhood misattunement wires shame, why anger isn’t the enemy, and how “emotional completion” helps you reclaim the parts you exiled to survive. They explore corrective relationships (why real safety can feel scary), co-regulation for kids, and practical steps to move from fawning to sovereignty. Key topics & takeaways: Shame as a survival strategy that blocks primary emotions (grief/anger) Emotional completion: feeling what shame protected so it can release Co-regulation vs. punishment/time-outs for children’s anger Corrective relationships: safety, grief, and why “boring” can be secure Depth sustains attraction; chemistry alone burns out Naming early ruptures without making caregivers “villains” Methods mentioned: NARM — Neuro-Affective Relational Model (Dr. Laurence Heller ). Resources (as mentioned by Rebecca): Try Rebecca’s mini course if you’re new to this work; consider the 5-module course for deeper practice HERE Parts 1 HERE & Part 2 of this series HERE 🔗 Follow Rebecca Prolman Instagram | TikTok | YouTube → @rebeccaprolman Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nov 5, 202550 min

Attachment Trauma Series PART 2 - Connection, Attunement & the Love/Sex Split with Rebecca Prolman

John Kim and Rebecca Prolman unpack how childhood attachment wounds and the shame-based adaptations they create - shape adult relationships. They trace core capacities (connection, attunement, trust, autonomy, love/sexuality) and show how co-regulation and healthy boundaries restore intimacy and desire. Resources mentioned: NARM (NeuroAffective Relational Model) framework and a 5-module course by Rebecca you can find HERE Part 1 of this series HERE 🔗 Follow Rebecca Prolman Instagram | TikTok | YouTube → @rebeccaprolman Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nov 3, 202546 min

How to Heal From Your Attachment Trauma Series with Rebecca Prolman PART 1

In Part 1 of this 3-episode series, John Kim and licensed therapist Rebecca Prolman break down attachment trauma in clear, human terms. They unpack emotional neglect, nervous-system dysregulation, the NARM approach (NeuroAffective Relational Model), and why so many of us carry shame that isn’t ours. You’ll learn the core dilemma children face (“stay connected to myself or stay safe in the bond?”), how that shapes adult relationships, and why agency + self-compassion are non-negotiables for healing. What you’ll learn: Attachment trauma vs “big-T” trauma Emotional neglect and why it’s so slippery to see The core dilemma and how shame gets internalized NARM, survival strategies, and nervous-system regulation Why we numb (food, sex, alcohol, scrolling) Agency: choosing with awareness instead of self-shame 🔗 Follow Rebecca Prolman Instagram | TikTok | YouTube → @rebeccaprolman Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 29, 202540 min

Falling for Your Therapist: Why It Happens & What It Means

What happens when therapy becomes personal? In this raw and honest conversation, John Kim talks with licensed therapist Rebecca Prolman about her real-life experience of falling for her therapist — and what it taught her about attachment, shame, and healing. Together they explore the taboo topic of client-therapist attraction, transference and counter-transference, and how therapy can mirror our deepest childhood wounds. 💬 Topics include: Why we develop crushes on therapists (and what it really means) The difference between a crush and being in love How to talk about attraction safely in therapy When boundaries blur and healing turns into heartbreak Why honesty is the path to repair ✨ Connect with Rebecca Prolman: Instagram | TikTok | YouTube: @rebeccaprolman Website: rebeccaprolman.com Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 27, 202542 min

Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy | Are You Loving the Wrong Way?

In this episode, John dives into some of the most honest, relatable, and raw relationship questions we all face — from managing triggers and attachment styles to knowing when it’s time to let go. If you’ve ever asked yourself “Am I loving the wrong way?” or “How do I know if this relationship is worth it?” — this one’s for you. It’s not about perfect love — it’s about real, healthy connection. Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 23, 202523 min

Why Losing Everything Can Lead to Your Most Authentic Self

In this special episode, John Kim brings together five brilliant voices - Amy Chan, Terri Cole, Dene Logan, Vanessa Bennett, and Daniel Stewart - for a raw and honest conversation about love, grief, codependency, and what it really means to grow. They unpack: Turning loss into a wake-up call 🌿 The biology of heartbreak and trauma bonds ❤️‍🔥 How to tell if growth is healthy or self-abandonment What a “midlife crisis” is really trying to teach us Redefining partnership, independence, and self-love It’s messy, heartfelt, and deeply human - a quilt of wisdom and laughter about what it means to be alive and love in 2025. Guests: Amy Chan – Author of “Breakup Bootcamp” @missamychan Terri Cole – Author of “The Boundary Boss” & “Too Much” @terricole Dene Logan – Author of “Sovereign Love” @dene.logan Vanessa Bennett – Author of “The Motherhood Myth” @vanessabennetttherapy Daniel Stewart – Psychotherapist, teacher & musician @minstrelion Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 22, 20251h 18m

Living in Flow: Escaping the Fight-or-Flight Loop

In this week’s episode, John Kim shares a real story about risk, fear, and transformation. What started as a property deal in Costa Rica turned into a profound reminder about the power of mindset. When we shift from fear to growth, everything changes - from how we love to how we live. ✨ Episode Highlights: How a 25-year-old inspired a new way to think about challenges Why growth mindset leads to freedom Turning your environment into a therapeutic tool Living in flow, not fear Connect with Luis Perez — Costa Rica Real Estate Agent Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luisperezrealestate/ Website: https://perezrealestategroupcr.com/ Whatsapp: wa.me/50683199154 🌴 John’s first Costa Rica Retreat runs Dec 1–5 - built around play, connection, and somatic wellness. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You → The Angry Therapist on SubStack Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 20, 202517 min

The Power of Not Giving a F*ck After 40

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There’s a freedom that comes in your 40s that no one warns you about - because it doesn’t come from achievement or success. It comes from shedding. In this episode, John and Vanessa talk about what it really means to stop giving a f*ck - not in the cynical sense, but in the self-loving one.It’s about choosing your energy wisely, letting go of people and stories that no longer fit, and returning to who you were before the world told you to shrink. This is the power of midlife clarity. It’s not burnout - it’s rebirth. In this episode: What “not giving a f*ck” really means (hint: it’s not apathy) How turning 40 rewires your priorities Knowing what’s yours to own - and what’s not The end of proving yourself and chasing validation Returning to your core self The quiet strength of keeping promises to yourself Mentioned in this episode: Vanessa’s Inter Compass Academy - coaching through the lens of depth psychology. Join the next cohort HERE⁠ or learn more about Vanessa HERE Follow Vanessa on Instagram: @vanessaabennett Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 15, 202521 min

The Pressure to Make Them Proud: Letting Go of Conditional Love

What happens when love feels like pressure - when “I’m proud of you” never came? In this honest conversation, John Kim and John Wang, author of Big Asian Energy, talk about growing up with parents who equated love with achievement, and what it takes to finally feel enough on your own terms. In this episode, you’ll hear about: The invisible weight of trying to make your parents proud Why love often sounds like pressure in achievement-driven families The difference between being accepted and truly belonging Healing generational patterns of sacrifice and self-doubt Redefining success to include joy, rest, and self-worth 📘 John Wang’s book, Big Asian Energy, is available HERE and wherever books are sold. 👉 Follow John Wang on Instagram @johnwangofficial John Wang's Website HERE Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 13, 202542 min

Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy | Love is Better. Not Harder.

In this Q&A, John Kim answers your raw, unfiltered questions about love, attachment, and what it actually takes to build a healthy relationship. From anxious-avoidant dynamics to retroactive jealousy and emotional unavailability — this one gets real. Whether you’re questioning if love should be easy, wondering why your partner won’t commit, or struggling to let go of the past, this episode dives straight into the messy middle — and ends with clarity, honesty, and hope. Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 9, 202517 min

I Knew on My Wedding Day He Wasn’t the One

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What happens when your dream wedding hides a truth your body already knows? In this powerful conversation, writer and author Amber Rae opens up to John Kim about walking down the aisle knowing she was marrying the wrong man - and the courage it took to leave, fall in love again, and finally meet herself. In this episode, you’ll hear about: Knowing when you’re in the wrong relationship The fear of leaving when everyone’s watching How unmet childhood wounds shape our choices The difference between safety and true connection Why telling the truth can set everyone free Whether you’re stuck in a “safe” love, afraid to start over, or trying to trust your gut again, this story will remind you that it’s never too late to choose yourself. Amber Rae’s new book Lovable is out now and available HERE Follow Amber at @heyamberrae Visit amberrae.com for more of her work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 8, 202552 min

How I Traded Hollywood Dreams for a Real Life

What happens when the blueprint you’ve been chasing - cars, houses, status - no longer fits who you’ve become? In this powerful episode, John Kim shares how he traded Hollywood dreams for a meaningful life in Costa Rica, and how redefining his blueprint transformed everything. In this conversation, you’ll hear about: Why chasing cars, houses, and status leaves you empty The shift from living “outside-in” to “inside-out” How unconscious definitions shape love, work, and happiness The moment John redefined his blueprint as a parent Steps to rewrite your blueprint and live with meaning This isn’t about rejecting success - it’s about creating new definitions that actually serve who you are today. Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 6, 202520 min

Building A Life That Fills You

What do you do when life forces you to start over? John Kim shares how he rebuilt his life in Costa Rica - through community, facing fears, daily rituals, and love check-ins. A raw, honest guide to rebuilding with intention. In this episode, you’ll hear about: How community can ground and heal you Facing fears to unlock flow states Shifting fitness and diet in new ways Why relationships get exposed during big transitions Anchors, daily rituals, and what it means to “spin plates” Whether you’re recovering from loss, moving somewhere new, or just craving change, this episode is a roadmap for rebuilding with intention. 🌴 Plus: John announces his upcoming Costa Rica retreat, December 1–5, with an optional two-day medicine journey add-on. Designed as a hybrid of adventure and wellness, this retreat is about connection, creativity, and starting fresh in one of the most beautiful places on earth. Sign up HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oct 1, 202519 min

No Regrets: The Power of Honest Choices

What if there were no “wrong” choices - only honest ones? In this episode, John Kim unpacks how to stop second-guessing yourself and start trusting the decisions that truly align with who you are. Instead of chasing the “right” path or playing it safe, John shares how honest choices open doors you never expected, build real self-trust, and help you live without regrets. In this conversation, you’ll discover: Why “safe” decisions often keep you stuck The surprising difference between right vs. honest choices How to use your body and intuition as a compass Two simple questions that cut through fear and doubtWhy the real risk isn’t failure - it’s never really living If you’ve been paralyzed by indecision, this is the episode that will help you choose courage over fear and step fully into your own life. John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 29, 202518 min

Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy | Hard Truths on the Couch

In this Q&A episode, we dive into your unfiltered questions about heartbreak, dating, relationships, and therapy. From moving on after betrayal to navigating compatibility and attachment, we explore the messy, honest realities of love - and the ways we can grow through them. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 25, 202520 min

Can Trauma Become Your Superpower? | Sheree’s Story of Healing & Resilience

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Can trauma become your superpower? In this powerful conversation, John Kim sits down with author and ghostwriter Sheree Medeiros to explore how the deepest wounds can lead to resilience, healing, and even purpose. Sheree shares her journey - growing up with an absent father, surviving sexual assault, battling illness, and ultimately discovering that her pain could be transformed into service, connection, and strength. In this episode, you’ll hear: How father wounds shape identity and relationships Sheree’s story of survival, forgiveness, and resilience The hidden connection between trauma and physical illness Why hyper-independence can be a false strength The power of vulnerability, community, and rewriting your story 📘 About Sheree Medeiros (Trask): Sheree is the author of Surviving Silence (October 2022), a seasoned ghostwriter, and a nonfiction book writing coach. She supports coaches, healers, and leaders in writing their transformational books to make a bigger impact, build authority, and gain recognition in their fields. Sheree has ghostwritten for some of the most influential names in personal development and holistic health, with her work published by Hay House, Inc. and HarperCollins. She is on a mission to help transform the hearts and minds of humanity through courageous storytelling, aiming to raise the collective consciousness and truly be free to live unapologetically out loud. 📕 Get her book: Surviving Silence HERE John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 24, 202538 min

Unscripting Your Limiting Beliefs: Rewrite Your Narrative

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Do you ever feel like an invisible script is controlling your life, dictating what you can and can't achieve? What if I told you that script was written by *you*, and you have the power to rewrite every single line? In this episode, licensed therapist - John Kim will reveal how to identify those hidden limiting beliefs and transform your narrative for good. John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 22, 202519 min

Two Therapists in Bed: Can You Really Make a Marriage Bulletproof?

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In this episode, John and Vanessa dive into one of their most personal conversations yet: Can you make a marriage bulletproof? What starts with a casual coffee shop chat about Costa Rica being a place where marriages “come to die” spirals into a raw, honest discussion about trust, romance, fear, and what truly keeps a relationship alive. They debate: Why moving to “paradise” can magnify relationship cracks. The difference between trusting the container of marriage vs. trusting the love itself. Realist vs. romantic mindsets in marriage and how they collide. Vulnerability, attachment styles, and what it means to truly choose someone. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship could survive the hardest tests or if bulletproof love even exists - this episode is for you. John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 17, 202540 min

3 Hidden Signs Your Therapist Is Taking Sides

Ever felt ganged up on in therapy? We explore how bias “leaks,” how to ask for fairness, and three tools you can also use when giving relationship advice to a friend - so you support without picking sides. Learn to hold space (not control outcomes) and keep growth honest - even when it’s messy. What you’ll learn: How “leaking bias” erodes trust - and how to name it constructively. The difference between helping and imposing (holding space vs. fixing). 3 neutrality tools you can use with friends. Why therapy is messy (and human), not math and how to keep growth on track. John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 15, 202522 min

Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | Love Is Messy. Here’s The Truth.

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In today’s episode, John Kim answers your most vulnerable questions about relationships - from surviving infidelity and messy breakups, to knowing when it’s time to try again (or walk away), to managing jealousy, triggers, and control. Raw, honest, and unfiltered — this is the conversation we all need about love, loss, and everything in between. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 11, 202521 min

Fasting Without Fasting: The Shortcut That Changes Everything

In this episode, John Kim sits down with Dr. Chris Rhodes, a nutritional biochemist and biohacking pioneer, to uncover the truth about fasting—and a revolutionary shortcut that could change everything. From the myths of intermittent fasting to the hidden benefits of extended fasts, Dr. Rhodes shares his research, self-experiments, and the breakthrough supplement MIMIO that mimics the body’s fasting state without the struggle. Whether you’re fasting-curious, already skipping meals, or simply want better energy, less bloating, and a path to longevity, this conversation is packed with science, storytelling, and real solutions. What You’ll Learn: Why most people are “fasting wrong” The real benefits that kick in after 24–36 hours without food How fasting impacts inflammation, bloating, and cellular health The science behind MIMIO: fasting without fasting Practical tips for making fasting sustainable in real life Learn more about MIMIO, HERE Follow Dr. Rhodes on TikTok, HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 10, 202540 min

Do You Ever Carry Someone You Couldn't Save?

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In today’s deeply moving episode, John shares a story most therapists would never dare reveal - the client who still haunts him years later. This isn’t about clinical textbooks or success stories. It’s about the raw, unfiltered truth of what happens when therapy collides with real life, addiction, and the weight of responsibility no one prepares you for. What you’ll learn: Why peace matters more than ever in today’s noisy world The hidden trauma therapists experience alongside their clients What it feels like when a client disappears under your care Why not every therapist is “the one” who changes a client’s life How to protect your peace and boundaries, even in chaos Where do you find peace - and how do you protect it? Drop your answer in the comments. Read more chapters from John’s upcoming book HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 8, 202522 min

Two Therapists in Bed Talk: Can Men Say No to Casual Sex? (And Other Big Questions We Avoid)

From sex myths to second chances, safe choices to stuck seasons - John and Vanessa answer real listener questions from bed. You’ll hear why gendered scripts about sex don’t serve us, what really matters before getting back with an ex, how to choose the “risky” path without regret, and why feeling unmotivated can be a necessary pause - not a personal failure. What you’ll learn Can men say no to casual sex? (and why the answer matters) Exes & ego: new tracks vs. old dynamics Ditch “right vs. wrong” decisions; choose what’s honest now Motivation is overrated; integration time builds strength Links & mentions Vanessa’s book: The Motherhood Myth HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 3, 202526 min

Why Your World Feels Small (and How to Redefine Life Before It’s Too Late)

Sometimes life forces you to hit reset. For me, it was losing my house. For you, it might be a breakup, a career shift, or just that nagging feeling that life is smaller than it should be. In this walk-and-talk episode from Costa Rica, I share how I’ve been redefining everything: happiness, relationships, play, even what “success” means. The truth is - growth doesn’t come from routines. It comes from curiosity, from being willing to reimagine your definitions. You’ll hear stories of: My second rebirth at 52 How living abroad reshaped my creativity and sense of play Why redefining doesn’t require moving countries—it can start with friendships, hobbies, or daily joy The hidden power of changing your environment My challenge for you: What’s one thing you can redefine this week? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sep 1, 202515 min

Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | Heartbreak Hurts Here's Why

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In today’s episode, John Kim takes on your raw, unfiltered questions about love — from the heartbreak of seeing an ex with someone new, to the chaos of dating in your 40s, to navigating loneliness, trauma, and self-worth. It’s the real talk you’ve been craving: messy, honest, and maybe the perspective you need to keep moving forward. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 28, 202523 min

When You Shut the Door on Miracles

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What if it’s not the big traumas that hold us back, but the tiny cracks in how we think each day? In this episode, John Kim and Vanessa unpack how we unconsciously block miracles - through catastrophizing, over-stimulation, and self-protection - and how small shifts in mindset can open the door to flow, joy, and unexpected magic. If this helped, hit subscribe for practical, no-fluff relationship tools. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 27, 202520 min

Still Stuck on Your Ex | This is Why

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Closure isn’t a door you wait to have slammed shut - it’s a bridge you build. In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim breaks the biggest “closure” myths and shows you how to move forward without an apology, a perfect explanation, or one last text. If you’ve felt stuck in relationship residue, this is your map. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why “waiting for closure” keeps you stuck Acceptance over answers (and why that heals faster) How to generate closure without contact Turning an expired relationship into a stronger self Realism > idealism: healing as a process, not an event Community & service as fuel for resilience If this helped, follow the show on Spotify and share it with someone who needs it today. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 25, 202515 min

Stop Guessing Their Love: Say What Lands

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A 30-second, playful moment sparked this episode - and a reminder: love isn’t generic. We break down how to speak love so it lands without abandoning yourself, especially when partners differ. What you’ll learn (10 takeaways): Love isn’t generic - different emotional blueprints How to avoid the “I’m giving everything, it’s still not enough” trap Building emotional safety so defenses drop Reducing resentment & energy burnout Deepening intimacy beyond the physical Faster conflict repair by making the nervous system feel safe Future-proofing with regular “What makes you feel most loved?” check-ins Co-regulation: why the right love calms insecure attachment Turning micro-moments into daily bonding rituals Why guessing breaks trust (love is a skill) Try this today: Ask your partner, “What lands for you this week?” Then do one unexpected gesture in their way of receiving love (a short note, a quick chore, five phone-free minutes together, a gentle touch, a tiny gift). If this helped, hit subscribe for practical, no-fluff relationship tools.Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 20, 202526 min

From Nauseous Nights to Perfect Mornings | Life in Costa Rica

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In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim takes you inside his personal journey of building a new life in Costa Rica - the highs, the lows, and the unexpected lessons about presence, clarity, and decision-making. From nausea-inducing dirt roads to perfect mornings surfing in Costa Rica, John unpacks how life-changing decisions aren’t made in one big moment… but in a collection of small ones. You’ll learn: Why clarity about life, love, and career comes from moments, not constant certainty How to notice and “bank” the moments that matter when deciding whether to move abroad, who to love, or what path to take The challenges of living in Costa Rica - from unpaved roads to missing city comforts and the surprising joys that outweigh them How being present is the only way to truly capture moments (and how most of us miss them) Why life’s “yes” often comes from an accumulation of tiny affirmations rather than a single sign Join the conversation! What moments have shaped your biggest life decisions? Have you noticed when your “piggy bank” of yeses finally tipped the scale? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about expat life, self-discovery, and building a life that actually feels like yours. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 18, 202516 min

Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | The Truth About Breakups

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In today’s episode, John Kim answers raw, unfiltered listener questions on the theme of breakups and divorce — the things you’d never dare ask your therapist. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 14, 202518 min

Loving Without Losing Me: Healing the Mother Wound

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In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim gets personal about the mother wound - how it quietly shapes our self-worth, love life, and sense of safety. From a surprising MDMA journey insight to stories about his Korean-American upbringing, John unpacks what it’s like to grow up without emotional warmth from mom - and how this absence leaves lasting imprints on both men and women. You’ll learn: Why the mother wound isn’t just a “women’s issue” How emotional absence can be just as impactful as physical absence The different ways the mother wound shows up in men (approval seeking, caretaking confusion, fear of intimacy) and women (perfectionism, chronic self-doubt, boundary struggles) How it fuels unhealthy patterns like codependency, attachment insecurity, and emotional projection Practical steps for healing: naming the wound without blame, reparenting yourself, rewriting old relationship scripts, and doing inner child work Join the conversation! Have you noticed the mother wound in your own relationships or self-image? What has helped you start to heal? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about love, identity, and the work of healing yourself from the inside out. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 13, 202523 min

The Lie We Tell Men About Strength

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In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks the father wound - how it silently shapes our self-worth, relationships, and ideas of masculinity. Through raw personal stories and practical, street-level insights, he explores what it means to grow up with a “ghost father” and how both men and women can begin to heal. You’ll learn: Why the father wound exists even if your dad was “there” How it shows up differently for men and women Why emotional absence can leave deeper scars than physical absence How it becomes a blueprint for love, power, and identity Practical ways to reparent yourself and break the cycle Join the conversation! Do you think you have a father wound? How has it shown up in your relationships or self-image? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations on relationships, self-worth, and the work of healing. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 11, 202525 min

Two Therapists in Bed Talk Breakups, Healing, and OnlyFans

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In this episode, licensed therapists John Kim and Vanessa Bennett dive deep into healing, heartbreak, attachment styles, and codependency - all from the comfort of their bed. With real-life stories, practical insights, and the lens of depth psychology, they unpack what it really means to "heal" and why the journey is anything but linear. You’ll learn: Why “healed” is a myth - and what healing actually looks like How depth psychology helps us make meaning from pain Why breakups hurt even when you’re the one who ends it The difference between codependency and true connection How to stop chasing love and start living your own life Join the conversation! Have you struggled with anxious attachment or feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions? What does healing mean to you? Drop a comment and share your take. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations on relationships, soul work, and the human experience. Resources & Links: Learn more about Vanessa HERE Vanessa’s Inner Compass Academy HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 6, 202525 min

Love Doesn’t Kill Jealousy - It Listens to It

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In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks jealousy through raw personal stories and powerful insights. He dives into the emotional roots of jealousy, including insecurity, fear of abandonment, and core wounds — and offers real, practical tools to navigate it with compassion and clarity. You’ll learn: How jealousy actually protects us (until it doesn’t) The difference between healthy and toxic jealousy Why core wounds trigger jealousy more than reality does How to build trust and “jealousy-safe” relationships Join the conversation! Share your thoughts or experiences with jealousy in the comments below. How do you handle jealousy in your relationships? If you found value in this episode, follow the show and share it with someone who needs to hear this. For more insights on relationships, self-growth, and mental health, don’t miss upcoming episodes. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Aug 4, 202525 min

My F*cking Feelings: An "Unproductive" Day

Today, John shares a personal take on creativity, productivity, and the pressures they carry. He explores how AI is reshaping the creative process, the quiet power of everyday moments, and why it's worth challenging traditional ideas of success. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 30, 202520 min

You're Not Too Much — They Just Weren't Equipped

Today, John unpacks how childhood experiences shape our ability to express emotions and why traits often seen as flaws can actually be powerful strengths. He also highlights the importance of reframing our emotional narratives, building a strong support system, and embracing the messy—but meaningful—journey toward authenticity. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 28, 202524 min

Why We Keep Chasing the Same Kind of Love

Today, John unpacks the complex layers of attraction, emotional wiring, and how our childhood shapes the way we love as adults. He dives into the connection between self-worth and the partners we choose, and why so many of us find ourselves settling—in both relationships and careers. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 23, 202522 min

One Month in Costa Rica: The Good, the Bad, and Could This Be Our New Home?

Today, John reflects on his first month living in Costa Rica—what's surprised him, what’s challenged him, and what’s changed him. He opens up about the warmth of the people, unexpected joy of slowing down, highs, lows, and lessons of this major lifestyle shift. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 21, 202531 min

I Feel Lost. What's the First Step to Changing My Life?

Today, John explores the idea of rebirth and redefining happiness. He emphasizes the importance of pulling from personal truth, recognizing when you're in survival mode, and taking actionable steps towards authenticity and fulfillment. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 16, 202527 min

The Race Was Never Real: Notes on Slowing Down Without Falling Behind

Today, John discusses the importance of embracing change, practicing mindfulness through surfing, and the significance of detachment from societal pressures. He also reflects on redefining success, finding joy in simplicity, and experiencing life in vibrant color. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 14, 202521 min

Nightcap, Costa Rica Edition: Burning Down Old Blueprints & Redefining Happy

Today, John reflects on the rapid changes in his life, the cultural adjustments he faces, and the importance of community and authentic relationships. He discusses the shedding of old blueprints and the creation of a new life that feels more honest and fulfilling. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠⁠⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 9, 202532 min

Morning Coffee in the Jungle: Day in the Life & New Mindset Change

Today, John discusses the significance of family, the creative process of documenting life, and the concept of life as an act break. Throughout, he emphasizes the value of intentional living and how it shapes daily routines and interactions. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠⁠⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 7, 202539 min

How Life Transitions Impact Relationships.

Today, John and Vanessa discuss their experiences and challenges after moving to Costa Rica. They explore themes of cultural adjustment, language barriers, relationship dynamics, community connection, and the impact of motherhood on their lives. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠⁠⁠⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about Vanessa: HERE Order Vanessa's new book, The Motherhood Myth, HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ HERE⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠HERE⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠ HERE⁠ Find out more about John⁠ HERE⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 4, 202531 min

Costa Rica: Week One

Today, John discusses the challenges and joys of relocating, the importance of community, and the lifestyle changes that come with living in a new country. He reflects on the beauty of the beach life, the culinary delights of Costa Rican food, and the fears he faces about the future. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠⁠⁠⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ HERE⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠HERE⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠ HERE⁠ Find out more about John⁠ HERE⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jul 2, 202531 min

The Myth of ‘The One’: Why Soulmates Are Built, Not Found

Today, John unpacks the modern myth of the soulmate — and flips it on its head. Instead of chasing “the one,” he invites us to rethink soulmates as built, not found— and explores how true connection comes not from perfection, but from shared growth, challenges, and the courage to repair after rupture. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠⁠⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jun 30, 202522 min

RE-RELEASE: Resting B*tch Face

Today, John talks about the transformative power of honesty. Reflecting on past relationships and personal beliefs, he explores the courage it takes to confront self-deception and encourages listeners to examine where they may be out of alignment. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HEREFind out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jun 27, 202513 min

Night Cap. Ramblings and Revelations (First One Since the Fire)

Today, John opens up about letting go of his former life and embracing new possibilities, including a bold move to Costa Rica. He shares insights on personal evolution, the changing landscape of entertainment in the digital age, and redefines love as a state of being. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. ⁠SIGN UP HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jun 25, 202540 min

You Don’t Need a Perfect Life. You Just Need This

Today, John redefines happiness — not as a far-off destination, but as a daily practice rooted in intention. He unpacks the myth of “arrival,” urging us to stop waiting for external circumstances to shift and instead cultivate joy from within. Single On Purpose School starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself and build a life you love — on your terms. SIGN UP HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jun 23, 202530 min

What is Healthy & Unhealthy Love?

Today, John explores the difference between healthy and unhealthy love — what each looks like, how they show up, and why the distinction matters. He unpacks the power of repair in relationships and how conscious effort is key to cultivating connection. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HEREFind out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jun 20, 202515 min