Sol Movement & Ritual

This AMAZING time we live in offers so many opportunities for us and for our children. However, it also presents many unique challenges as well. Girls growing up now face specific difficulties, and boys do too. In this episode, we address some of the issues that accompany raising boys, and what we have seen in our sons’ lives. We also bring in a lot of great info from authors who have done far more research on the subject of boys.We address issues like how to cultivate respectful, strong, and kind boy by channeling his natural strengths (as opposed to simply suppressing all of their tendencies and making them feel like they are terrible all the time). We explore some fascinating psychology and hopefully help all of us raise boys who become men who are whole, respectful, humans who make this world a better place:).Books that inspired us:Calmer, Easier, Happier Boys // Noel Janis-NortonBoys Adrift // Leonard SaxWild Things // Stephen James and David ThomasThe planner that was Felica’s high five: High Performance Planner // Brendon BuchardOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this mini episode, Taralyn guides us through the meditation we do every day. She was originally inspired by several different meditation teachers, and has adapted their techniques using other practices that people have used for thousands of years to what works well for her. After listening to this audio every day for a couple weeks, you’ll find that you can do the sequence on your own without any guidance. Anywhere you find yourself, you can do this practice. Here is the sequence for reference: Breathing (where your exhale is twice as a long as your inhale) -2 deep breaths with your fingertips pressing 2 inches below your belly button -2 deep breaths with your fingertips pressing over your heart -2 deep breaths with your fingertips pressing in the center of your forehead just above your eye Body mindfulness: Tap into what you are feeling, hearing, tasting, and smelling, and seeing Mantra Meditation: Focus on the word one, and come back to it when thoughts come Gratitude/manifestation: Think of something you’re grateful for, then feel gratitude for something you are hoping to manifest, and then detach from the outcome and be open to inspired action you can take to make it happen. (I like to connect them—for example: if you want flat abs, 1) Feel gratitude about the core strength you have already, 2) feel the feeling of gratitude and whatever emotion you would feel with amazing flat abs, and then 3) detach from the outcome (realize your happiness isn’t dependent on it), and be open to whatever inspired action you can take).Love/Metta Meditation: focus on imagining someone or something you love in front of you, then you gradually expand that love This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We all know that setting aside time to feed our souls is important, and it’s no secret that one of our core habits that we use to get this time is our morning routine. This habit has literally been the biggest game changer in our own fulfillment and wholeness, and so we really can’t say enough good about it.This subject remains one of our most frequently asked listener questions, so in this episode, we delve deep into some tricks to really help cement this routine into a long term, non-negotiable habit. We also introduce you to a really accessible form of meditation, and will give you tools to get you started on this life changing habit, or give you ideas to improve what you already have going.Books that inspired us:Stress Less, Accomplish More // Emily FletcherThe Miracle Morning // Hal ElrodOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Is it possible to be mindful and present while still not doing everything your child wants? What about multitasking with an audiobook in your ear? Are you sacrificing present awareness for that? And lastly, when you have a baby and a toddler and are facing the daunting task of establishing a bedtime routine by yourself as a parent, how can you stay present without relying on technology as your second pair of hands? After receiving so many wonderful questions from all of you amazing listeners, we address a few common issues that apply to so many parents. Our Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books): https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram: Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

This time of year, so many people are getting their book list goals going, and so we, along with some awesome guest co-hosts, give you our current favorite books from several different genres (gasp—not just self-help!). As you consider what you are going to read this year, this episode will give you ideas about which ones to add. It’s like we’re all a part of a great big book club. If you read them, let us know what you think!If you’d like to see all of the books we mentioned in this episode, check out our website: www.findthemagic.co/episodes/ep-55-book-club-recommendations-for-2020 This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we recap our 2019 year with all of our favorite life hacks and tips that have improved our lives. Below we have links to all our favorite items we mentioned, along with our favorite green smoothie recipes. Enjoy! You can see all the details on Episode 54 at findthemagic.coBooks we mention: Meditations for Soul Realization // Master Choa Kok Sui // https://amzn.to/2QrCAoO Stress Less, Accomplish More // Emily Fletcher // https://amzn.to/2FqlqBv The Art of Living // Thich Nhat Han // https://amzn.to/36tvYvL Our Current Favorite Green Smoothie: Flavor Base: *1-2 TBS Raw Cacao *1-3 TBS Peanut Butter *1 Frozen Banana (or not frozen—it doesn’t matter much) Super add-ons: *A handful of leafy greens (We just freeze Kale or Spinach or whatever blend we are in the mood for and then take out a handful at a time) A splash of Brain Octane Oil 2 droppers of Phytoplankton 1 heaping teaspoon Barley Grass Juice Powder 1 scoop Collagen Protein A few Probiotic capsules Raw Honey if you need more sweetness (or sweetener of your choice—I used to always add honey but now my tastebuds are used to it without-T) A few cubes of ice *Milk of your choice to fill up the rest—maybe like 1.5 cups? (we use coconut and almond the most but try other ones for fun sometimes too) Other Flavor Bases options we love: -Any tropical frozen fruit with half orange juice and half milk for the liquid and vanilla -Frozen peaches and wild blueberries with any juice (apple, orange, grape juice, or coconut water work nicely) *We choose organic where availability and budget make it a good option Other links to things we mentioned: Meditation on Twin Hearts by Master Choa Kok Sui: Full version on iTunes that Taralyn likes: https://music.apple.com/us/album/meditation-on-twin-hearts-with-self-pranic-healing/1078568154 The abridged version that Felica likes: https://youtu.be/N884jNJJpGc Tara Brach’s meditation we love: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tara-brach/id265264862#episodeGuid=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tarabrach.com%2Faudio%2F2011-03-23-Part-1-Healing-Power-of-Self-Compassion.mp3 Ziva Meditation: https://zivameditation.com // Emily Fletcher’s Meditation Website where she has some great courses and info Mindvalley: https://www.mindvalley.com // Where Taralyn took Emily Fletcher’s Meditation Course (and other awesome courses) Our Website has even more info::) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Over the years, we have learned so many parenting tips from the books as we have studied and we have tried out many of them. In this episode, we tell you our very very favorites. From philosophies that have transformed our parenting to hacks that have simply made our lives easier, we hope you’ll find these tips as helpful as we did!Our Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

The winter holidays can be a time of many opposites: joy and grief, magic and rushing, spirituality and materialism. Many of us put very high expectations on ourselves to somehow manage perfectly the practical aspects of this time of year (think gift planning and food making), create magical, cozy experiences for our children, while still cultivating room for an appreciation for the spiritual side for this season. All of these expectations can be...a lot. Add onto this the fact that many people have personal griefs that they are mourning this time of year, and it’s no wonder that for many, this time of year is less a season of joy and hope, and more a season of simply “getting through” and surviving.During this episode, we discuss tips to hopefully help you make this season a lot more enjoyable by looking at your own authentic values and creating a season of presence, awareness, and yes, lots and lots of joy (and maybe even a little magic).Our Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

There is so much effort that goes into running family life. There are seemingly endless housekeeping tasks, time planning, relationship maintenance, spiritual, academic, and physical teaching of children, budgeting, providing for the family’s needs, etc. You get the picture—it’s a long list. Sometimes, because of a lack of communication between partners, it is easy to build resentment when one person feels like he or she is carrying most of the load. In this episode, we lay out a specific program created by Eve Rodsky in her book Fair Play that we have used in our homes to help increase communication about task breakdown and cut down on resentment.This method is nice because it values both partners roles, takes into consideration the many different parenting/providing setups like 2 income households, one full time provider and one stay-at-home parent, and everything in between. It’s all about just finding what works for your family, and it is creates a framework for some really powerful dialogue between partners.The book that inspired us for this episode:Fair Play // Eve Rodsky // https://amzn.to/2M00mpfThe cards to start playing!: https://www.fairplaylife.com/downloadable-cardsOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Being present is one of our core philosophies, and so today, we dig deep into Chapter 1 of Eckhart Tolle’s book, A New Earth, and discuss how we have used the principles he writes about to uncover our own sense of presence.In our experience, the ability to be truly aware and present in any given situation, is the key to actually experiencing this life. When you are present, you feel awake, able to give and receive love more fully, and truly find access to a higher level of living.Book we mention:A New Earth // Eckhart Tolle // https://amzn.to/2P3gcBbOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! The holidays can be a busy time, so in the episode, we take our own advice and are simply doing a gratitude episode from home. We discuss some awesome research on the benefits of being thankful, share our individual gratitude lists, and give you some specific tips to help you cultivate a grateful heart during this holiday season. Here is the article we refer to on the benefits of cultivating gratitude:https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/giving-thanks-can-make-you-happierOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books): https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram: Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

This topic is near and dear to our hearts because we know, from personal experience and from hearing from many of you, how easy it is to lose our identity while pouring our heart and soul into the parenting of our children. How can we give selflessly like we want to while not forgetting our own wholeness?In this episode, we share with you our own raw experiences of our journey into motherhood, and times when we have lost our wholeness and how we found our way back to ourselves. Sometimes it’s easy to forget that we are more than the roles we fill. If you or someone you know is struggling with staying intact personally while parenting, we hope the discussion in this episode will help you navigate your own personal journey and find what works best for you and your family.Here is the article about postpartum support we mentioned: https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2017/06/26/534021439/secrets-of-breast-feeding-from-global-moms-in-the-knowOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Throughout our lives, we often find ourselves being triggered emotionally by other people’s actions. Maybe a store clerk says something that really sets us off, or a co-worker makes a comment that triggers anger or shame in us. These experiences every day give us the chance to really learn about ourselves. There are few situations that force us to really face this reality than in parenting because we are often pushed to our emotional limits (and we are often short on sleep for it as well!).That’s one of the beautiful things about parenting—it is truly a soul revealing journey. Our kids give us so many opportunities to observe what is triggers us (some days, it might feel like there is a bit too much triggering:). In this episode, we give you lots of concrete examples from parenting to allow you to first identify your own triggers and take back the power in the way you connect with others:)The book we referenced wasThe Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind // Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson // https://amzn.to/33ZSFWTOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Carol Dweck’s groundbreaking work on mindset has influenced so much of the way we talk about growth and success. In fact, our children’s school district is currently restructuring their teaching program to incorporate the concept of growth mindset! In this episode, we share our personal journey towards growth mindset and share tips on how to develop it in your own life. The focus here is how to truly internalize it and model it (not perfectly though—there is always room for growth!:).It is liberating as adults to realize that with a growth mindset, we are never stuck. The world is often far more open to us than we realize if we are willing to let go of our fixed mindset and look at the malleability of growth. This approach has the power to lessen the damages of perfectionism and allows for a less anxious view of life.The book we referenced was Mindset: The New Psychology of Success // Carol S. Dweck // https://amzn.to/2p9GBDxOur Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Every parent experiences their kids getting sick. In this episode, we explore how we can engage in wholehearted parenting even on those days when they aren’t feeling well. We also discuss some questions from listeners about what to do when toddlers seem to become so difficult that parenting feels unbearable.Things we mention:Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting // Dr. Laura Markham // https://amzn.to/327XmwgFelica’s favorite story meditation for her kids to listen to on sick days: https://music.apple.com/gb/album/your-secret-treehouse-guided-meditation/1256088681?i=1256088683Our Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We live in a time when there are SOO many fantastic options for educating our kids (and ourselves!) formally and informally. We have had many parents ask us about our take on how to enhance the process of learning in our families. There seems to be a lot of parent guilt about not doing enough to teach their young children structured academics, and some worry that they are making learning a drudgery by pushing it too much.In this episode, we address these concerns and offer our own personal approach, which focuses on a combination of guided and self directed learning, with a heavy dose of wonder, a touch of positive challenge, and a relaxed attempt at moderation. We have experience with several kinds of schooling, including homeschooling, and we give our take on the benefits of the different options.Books we mention:The Well Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at home // Susan Wise Bauer // https://amzn.to/31RFmGqTeaching from Rest: A Homeschooler’s Guide to Unshakable Peace // Sarah Mackenzie // https://amzn.to/32We2rUTaralyn’s current favorite homeschool curriculum options:Math: Primary Mathematics (aka Singapore Math) https://amzn.to/2NkVaMlLanguage Arts, Handwriting, and Science: The Good and the Beautiful from Jennyphillips.comHistory: A Well Trained Mind (they start with ancient and have all the eras). I started their Story of the World: History for the Classical Child: Volume 1: https://amzn.to/31TMT7iSpanish: Rosetta StoneKeyboarding: The Typing App from the Apple StoreAlso, here is a great podcast about the concept of free range learning if you are interested: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/respectful-parenting-janet-lansbury-unruffled/id1030050704?i=1000415099608Here is our favorite fall caramel recipe that Taralyn mentions in her high five:Taralyn and Felica’s Favorite Dipping CaramelAdapted from Jeanie Allen’s Caramel Corn recipefindthemagic.coThis caramel is the best we have ever had for dipping fall apples in. The texture is so creamy:)1 cube butter1 cup light corn syrup1⁄2 teaspoon salt1 box brown sugar (16 oz or 3 1⁄2 cups) (sometimes I just eyeball this - T)1 can Eagle brand sweetened condensed milk1/2 cup heavy whipping cream (optional)Combine all of these ingredients together and heat on medium low for a long time—at least a half hour, stirring often once it starts getting bubbly. The key is to do it slowly so it doesn’t burn, and it just barely boils. Do this until all the sugar is dissolved.Then, remove from heat and stir in the secret ingredient:1 Cup Sour Cream (I’ve added anywhere from a half cup to 1 pint, and it always turns out AMAZING - T).Our Website (You can find all show notes here, along with book recommendations and links to all past books):https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/p.s. Our secret to reading so many books is this little baby, a magical wireless earbud:) https://amzn.to/36d89Zj This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

As the weather outside gets colder, it becomes easier and easier to stay inside. Even when it is warm outside, the comforts of our homes and offices sometimes keep us in. However, going outside into the wild offers us soooo many benefits, from improved attention spans, increased physical wellness, and mood enhancement. In this episode, we explore what author Richard Louv has called Nature Deficit Disorder. This can show up as increased mood behaviors in children and physical affects such as cardiac risk factors and obesity. What happened to free playing outside!? We discuss how being out in nature helps our bodies and minds so much, and we give all kinds of tips on how to get yourself (and your kids) outside more. Books: Last Child in the Woods // Richard Louv - https://amzn.to/35Tamcc The Nature Fix // Florence Williams - https://amzn.to/2Bx5YSk Our Website (You can find all show notes here! Along with book recommendations and links to all past books): https://www.findthemagic.co Find us on instagram: Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/ Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we indulge in talking about one of our favorite subjects—birth. Many of our listeners have asked us about our birth stories and for advice on how to approach the birthing process with joy instead of fear. We share our own personal stories, and what we found helpful in preparing for the birth of each of our children.Books we mention:Hypnobirthing// Marie Mongan // https://amzn.to/33xoSnMIna May’s Guide to Childbirth// Ina May Gaskin // https://amzn.to/33v5cB0 Links: This is the organization both of us took our classes from: https://www.hypnobabies.comThis is a preview for an awesome show about birth (there will be actual births in this); https://vimeo.com/47116003Our Website:https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Grit has become a buzzword in the self-help world thanks to some amazing research that has linked it to success. Grit is connected to courage, resolve, and strength of character. We believe grit is worth cultivating in our society as everything gets easier and our perseverance and commitment to go deeper in tasks can easily wane with our attention span. Angela Duckworth's book, Grit: The Power of Passion ad Perseverance, explores what makes someone "gritty,” why it is important, and how we can cultivate it. We are breaking down her theories in this episode and going specifically into how we can help encourage grit in ourselves and our kids!In this episode, we explore the research in Angela Duckworth’s book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance.Books we mention:Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance // Angela Duckworth https://amzn.to/2nqT70zHow to Raise Successful People: Simple Lessons for Radical Results // Esther Wojcicki https://amzn.to/2nqT70zOur Website:https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

As parents, many of us feel guilty that we aren’t engaging in play enough with our kids. Or, we feel guilty that our kids aren’t playing enough on their own to develop their imagination and instead spend lots of time in front of screens. Either way, there is lot of guilt to choose from. There is a reason mom guilt is such a popular term! We are here to suggest there is a better way:).In this episode, we address a few individual listener questions and explore how we can, by focusing first on connection and meeting their attention needs, create a secure setting or them to explore their own world of independent play. We also discuss how we can successfully let go of that parent guilt so you can actually enjoy that time you get to yourself while your kids are developing their imagination on their own.Books we mention:Magda Gerber // Your Self-Confident Baby // https://amzn.to/2ozGIY9Janet Lansbury // Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting // https://amzn.to/2n7IkrUOur Website:https://www.findthemagic.coFind us on instagram:Felica: https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/Taralyn: https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Have you ever been in the rut of the everyday? It can feel like a slog at times moving from one mundane task to the next. This shows up magnified in parenting when we are stuck on the treadmill of cleaning up spills, changing diapers, driving carpool, planning meals only to fall asleep exhausted and enter the next day that way! We easily catch ourselves living for our next date night, weekend away or perhaps even that day when “life will be easier, our kids will be older, we will have more money” etc.This episode we want to challenge that status quo. We want to share a concept with you that can awaken you to each of these moments and help you find the acceptance, joy and perhaps even enthusiasm in all of the parts of this life, small and big.We also chat about this weeks high fives including Taralyn being on Instagram! here- https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ and Felica confirming one of our truths, letting kids discover their passions and removing your ego from your kids education and extracurricular drive! BOOKS WE TALK ABOUT IN THIS EPISODEThe concept of these three modalities is from Eckhart Tolle’s book A New Earth. - https://amzn.to/2LDI2CoOprah’s feature on Elkhart- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/oprah-and-eckhart-tolle-a-new-earth/id1458654443Find Felica on Instagram here- https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We are so excited to review Essentialism by Greg Mckeown on this episode! We thought this book and giving our take on how to live true to your essentials would be a perfect follow up to the digital detox / finding solitude episode as creating that white space is really the first step in having mental clarity and presence with what you truly want for your life!Essentialism is the art of designing your life to include what is truly important to you. It is the discipline of separating the vital few from the trivial many. In this episode we chat about how we find mental clarity to do just that and what tools you can use to create space for your essentials. THINGS / BOOKS WE MENTIONEssentialism, The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown https://amzn.to/2O16IXfDigital Minimalism by Cal Newport https://amzn.to/2ZNWMHMPresent Over Perfect by Shauna Niequist https://amzn.to/2LwD0YvOUR WEBSITE FIND US ON INSTAGRAM - @felicaallen and @taralyngriffin This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Sweet sweet SWEET solitude. Sometimes I classify solitude as going to the bathroom alone or hiding in my closet for a couple extra minutes! As people of this social connected, news blasted time in history we rarely find quiet moments of PEACE to ourselves and our minds are craving them. On the flip side we also struggle to make deep meaningful connections with those around us resulting in anxiety and depression. How can we counterbalance this teeter totter? SOLITUDE. Time for our minds to rest, relax and reboot. In this episode we are discussing our experiment with a digital detox inspired by the book Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. Did we find more solitude and rest by simplifying how we use screens and technology? CAN YOU? THINGS / BOOKS WE MENTIONDigital Minimalism by Cal Newport https://amzn.to/2ZNWMHMNote to Self Podcast Collin Kartchner on Instagram OUR WEBSITE FIND US ON INSTAGRAM - @felicaallen and @taralyngriffinTaralyn’s High Five: her fave yoga studio, Root to Rise This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Today we answer questions from our awesome listeners! We address how to stay present and wholehearted while in the midst of parental sleep deprived exhaustion, how to survive with toddlers at the park while trying to feed a newborn, and how to help cultivate imaginary play in children who have become accustomed to screen time.Links to books we mentioned:Your Self Confident Baby // Magda GerberElevating Childcare // Janet LansburySimplicity Parenting // Kim John PayneHere are the podcast episodes we referred to:The Pause (this is our best advice on sleep:)Tantrums, screen time, and breaking out of a funkCurbing Our Own Screen Attachment This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We can get lost in parenting. One more diaper, another meal to clean up, another practice to run to. How can we connect with our spouse while parenting? Today we talk about both emotional and physical intimacy and give a few tips on how to cultivate it.Here are the professionals we refer to (as well as a hilarious YouTube video we laugh about:):Esther Perel’s Website and one of her books“What Turns You On” from the Goop podcast:Love Warrior // Glennon DoyleThis is the hilarious parenting video about how sometimes bedtime can be a reverse hostage negotiation by Michael McIntyre. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We all know connection is important, but sometimes we have a hard time knowing what we are doing to either foster of break our connections with the ones we love most. Today we explore what connection looks like, and how our ability to nurture connection is what gives us meaning. As with most things, it starts by looking inward. In this episode, you’ll find tips on how to set limits while still maintaining your relationships and how to give from a place of wholeness instead of resentment.The books that inspired this episode:Peaceful Parenting, Happy Kids // Dr. Laura MarkhamSoul of Discipline // Kim John Payne This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Today we are posting at the beach at the Oregon Coast! We have two special guests, and we talk about the best parenting advice we have ever received. Enjoy! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Eating is part of everyone’s life, and yet so many people struggle with having a healthy relationship with food. Before we can hope of helping our children grow into adults who are at peace with food, it is so important to model it ourselves. In this episode, we discuss our own personal relationship with food, which centers on mindfulness. We share insights from authors who have plenty of research to back up this mindful method. The goal with this approach is a life that is at peace with food and a body that is healthy and balanced.We hope you find it helpful! Books we refer to: Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works // Evelyn Tribole and Elyse ReschLove Warrior: A Memoir // Glennon DoyleAlso, here is the wireless ear bud that both Taralyn and Felica are obsessed with and that Taralyn was so sad to lose:) It is a GAME CHANGER! It’s really the key to how we listen to so many books. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Do your kids have trouble sitting for meals? Trying new foods? Are they constantly snacking and refusing to eat at meal times and do you find yourself cooking extra meals just for them? Sometimes food power struggles run our home and created unwanted anxiety and tension in our relationship with our kids. This episode we are breaking down one of our favorite parenting books "French Kids Eat Everything". It is on our list of recommendations to every new parent or caregiver. We are reviewing the French Food Rules that are applicable from the early days of infant eating all the way through childhood. And if you already have habits in your home that you are hoping to break this episode is for you as well! We have practical mutually respectful tips to create peaceful mealtimes in your home! Books we refer to:French Kids Eat Everything: How Our Family Moved to France, Cured Picky Eating, Banned Snacking, and Discovered 10 Simple Rules for Raising Happy, Healthy Eaters // Karen Le BillonHappiness Project: Or, Why I spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have Mor Fun // Gretchin RubinWe also mentioned Kodiak Cakes as one of Taralyn’s family’s favorite breakfasts. Her favorite flavor is the buttermilk and chia superfood packed one:). This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Do ever just wish for a simple breakdown of how to be the most effective parent? Parenting is so tricky and unique to each family situation but there are some tried and true rules that can help guide you. This episode we are breaking down the four basic parenting categories that most of us fall into. We loved seeing each laid out in this way to really simplify how we can approach parenting. Each style hinges on DEMAND and RESPONSE and the level at which we show both to our children. We know you will find some useful insight into how you are currently parenting and how you may be able to sweet your expectation (that tricky word!) and warm responsiveness to create an environment of growth and respect in your home!Books we mention in this episode are- How To Raise an Adult - https://amzn.to/2K0sJ4G This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we talk about how to approach our life from a place of abundance instead of scarcity by tapping into the emotions we all have access to. What is it that we feel like we truly want? A certain amount of money? A better marriage? And organized house? Kids who don’t sass?;) This episode is about tapping into the reserve of what we already have inside of us. By asking yourself some important questions about why you want any particular thing, you discover your true WHY. This discovery is a game changer because then, you can tap into that why at any time! It is LIBERATING to realize that you have the capacity to feel anything you want. It’s like you are stoking up a fire—it is awesome! Then, you come at your goal without the desperation and scarcity that you might have had before. You come at it from a place of confidence.We share details of how to use this technique, and share examples of how we have used it in our own lives. Thanks for listening!We mention the book Thrive by Arianna Huffington. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Summer is here! This beautiful season can be exhausting. In today’s episode we are talking about simplifying in this season as well as some tips to find peace in less that ideal circumstances. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Is praise a springboard or a trap?Everybody loves praise, right? But not all praise is created equally. Some praise encourages our children to develop grit, confidence, and resilience, while other kinds of praise can hinder our children and discourage their ability to keep trying when things get hard. In this episode, we share some fascinating research about both kinds of praise and discuss the best forms of praise for the overall wholeness for our kids. We also discuss the benefits of chores and give some tips about how to successfully cultivate hard work and responsibility in your kidlets. You can find the book that inspired us here: How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250093635/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_u-meDbES0W78HPraise advice from the American Psycological Association: https://www.apa.org/education/k12/using-praiseAn awesome article about how doing chores makes kids more successful:https://www.inc.com/bill-murphy-jr/kids-who-do-chores-are-more-successful-adults-according-to-science.html This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Do you ever feel like you are caught in the trap of overparenting? Today we talk about fostering independence in our kids using inspiration from the book How to Raise and Adult by Julie Lythcott-Hainsworth. As the Dean of Freshman at Stanford University, she spent a lot of time interacting with young adults. She found that despite the best of intentions, many parents are robbing their children of the chance to be their own independent person, and that this epidemic of child-like adults has been on the rise in recent years. In this episode, we discuss possible antidotes to this issue as our children grow. We focus on independence, wholeness, and emotional resilience. For a list of age appropriate tasks most kids can complete independently, check out:https://www.familyeducation.com/life/individuality/guide-to-teach-your-child-life-skills-by-ageYou can find the book that inspired us here: How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250093635/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_u-meDbES0W78H This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

On this episode, Felica offers advice on a few of our common listener questions. She addresses sharing (do we have the teach our kids to ALWAYS share? We don’t as adults...), the lovely bedtime boundaries that we all navigate, and what to do when you have a baby who seems extra “needy”. Find Felica here - https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We are all trying to do our best as parents, but as we adopt the wholehearted parenting philosophy, we might encounter resistance from people around us. Many of those people are well meaning, and some are not. It can be difficult because parenting is, well, a sensitive subject! And what about those people in our life who spend a lot of time with our kids and use differing parenting styles on them?Today we are going to give some tips to help you through those situations. (Hint: It has less to do other people than you think:). Books we refer to: I Can’t Wait to Go to the Dentist! By Jeanie U. Allen:Amazon.com: I Can't Wait to Go to the Dentist! (9781098890858): Jeanie U. Allen: Books This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We all know that kids need healthy boundaries around screen time, but what about us adults? There are fewer statistics on what it does to our health and brains, but wow—the research that has been done is...alarming. Technology is AWESOME, but it turns out that we adults also need time for intentional connection away from our devices. And whatever boundaries we set for ourselves impacts our own physical and mental health, and our relationships with the people we care about the most. We have an amazing chance to model what living a balanced, wholehearted life can look like with the convenience of smart technology in it while not letting it supersede the more important parts of our life. In today’s episode, we walk you through the stats to help give you some motivation to find screen time balance for yourself, and then give you some super helpful tips on how to do it.Books and articles we refer to:The Big Disconnect: Protecting Childhood and Family Relationships in the Digital Age https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062082434/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_uPq9CbYGF1G1FThe Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains https://www.amazon.com/dp/0393339750/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_dQq9Cb3ZE75DDhttps://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/dnpao/multimedia/infographics/getmoving.html?CDC_AA_refVal=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cdc.gov%2Fnccdphp%2Fdch%2Fmultimedia%2Finfographics%2Fgetmoving.htmhttps://www.yourmodernfamily.com/scary-truth-whats-hurting-kids/https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2014/08/06/parents-are-the-ones-who-need-limits-on-screen-time/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.2c2718935e0dhttps://www.bustle.com/articles/117838-5-things-too-much-screen-time-does-to-your-body This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We all know morning routines are important. This time of self care and energy management has the capacity to improve how we feel about our lives and how we show up for the people we love every day. Then why is it so hard sometimes to actually do? Today we are going to give you wake up strategies that you can do within the first 5 minutes of waking that will help you set the habit. We will also tell you is working for us right now in our morning routines that we are loving.We also answer a listener question about a toddler who won’t take no for answer, screaming, crying and hitting to get his way. Trust us...this is a game changer.Hal Elrod’s bedtime affirmations you can say to yourself before bed:https://m.box.com/shared_item/https%3A%2F%2Fwww.box.net%2Fs%2F6sr22rq0mbBooks and other items we mention in this episode:The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0979019710/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_W996CbV1T27NABlue light blocking glasses for evening TV watching: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B072JFMFPG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_u896CbPR21YR4One of Taralyn’s current fave morning herbal tea: Organic Mint tea: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E19WCTS/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_R496CbX9XJY0EWith Bulletproof Brain Octane oil mixed in: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00P8E0QQG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_4596CbYVN9YNMYou’ve Got Dragons by Kathryn Cave and Nick Maland (not on Amazon)For more parenting and life tips, tricks & inspiration find us on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/ https://www.instagram.com/taralyngriffin/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Nobody likes it when their toddlers misbehave. But what about older children, tweens and teens? Acting out happens at every age. Misbehavior is often a way kids “ping” to figure out where they stand with you. Most kids are simply disoriented. This reframing of their behavior is liberating for parents!In this episode, we give you examples of how to use connection and rhythms as the antidote to the disorientation that creates misbehaviors at any age and erodes your relationship with your kids.These tips apply to all parenting, but there are a few special tips that will help you as your kids are in the tween and teenager stages.Books we mention: The Soul of Discipline by Kim John PayneThe Entitlement Trap by Linda and Richard Eyre This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Do you find yourself repeating everything a million times or getting into endless arguments with your kids before they will (or won’t) do what you say?! We hope this episode helps! We are going to break down why most kids aren’t responding to their parents requests (key word!) and give you actionable tips to apply when you are giving firm direction. Books we talk about - The Soul of Discipline by Kim John Payne This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We cling to good experiences in our lives, and we attempt to close ourselves to bad ones. What’s wrong with that? This doesn’t allow either one to flow through us, and we often times end up losing the gift of the present moment when we do that. Have you ever been having a beautiful moment watching someone you love, when along comes a fearful thought about the future of that person to squash that joy? We will explore in this episode how you can stay open to the present moment, and lean into whatever feeling arises, positive or negative. This leads to so much present moment freedom. Books we mentioned: The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer, and Radical Acceptance by Tara Branch This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We get more questions about sibling conflict than any other topic! We know that how our kids get along can make or break our days. As parents we are the source of all our kids need, it is natural for them to feel resentment towards their siblings. In this episode we break down our favorite tips for guiding sibling conflict without interfering with their process. Here are the links of books related to this topic: Siblings without rivalry Janet Lansbury Unruffled Podcast This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we delve deeper into how disciplining from a place of true acceptance is far more powerful than from a place based on expectation and control. Acceptance does not mean parenting from a passive stat of allowance of indulgence. In fact, it is quite the opposite. We can still hold our boundaries with strength, but our children will feel at their core that our love for them is not on the line. Today we zoom in on specific, concrete examples to help us as parents be able to release control and really connect with our kids in the present moment. This is where the magic happens.Here are the links of books related to this topic:The Awakened Family: How to Raise Empowered, Resilient, and Conscious Children https://www.amazon.com/dp/0399563970/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_NkCVCbTXCH9RM This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Children are wonderful teachers. We learn so much about ourselves during the journey of parenting. When our kids do something that drives us crazy, it is an opportunity for us to look inside of us. Kids don’t trigger us, we trigger ourselves. This concept is mind blowing once you unlock the theory.Today we explore the concept of how this process of self discovery can free us from expectations. The word expectation often has a positive connotation, but today we will explore how some expectations might be more damaging than we think. As parents, most of us want our kids to be independent thinkers and strong, confident trailblazers. But at the same time, we don’t want them to develop those traits while in our own home, because that might conflict with our own agenda. This mindset creates trouble because we can’t expect our children to become independent the instant they leave the house at 18 years old. Many children get the unintentional message as children: be yourself, as long as that self is the one that we have chosen for you as parents. Our expectations for you are the only ones you are safe to meet. Today we explore the paradox that as we release our children from our rigid expectations (while still setting healthy boundaries and limits of course), we can truly engage with them in the present moment by using powerful intention.These two words, intention and engagement are the antidote for relationship damaging expectation. The books/authors we mention in this episode are:The Awakened Family by Dr. Shefali TsabaryElevating Childcare by Janet Lansbury This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Today we introduce the concept of The Pause. It is the idea that really first turned Felica on to the concept of wholehearted parenting. It is a quite magical technique that helps make so many parenting situations not only easier but more filled with peace and respect. We cover how it applies to babies, toddlers, and older kids in common parenting pain areas such as fussy babies, toy squabbles, hitting, and tattling. We hope it helps you:). INSTAGRAM https://www.instagram.com/felicaallen/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

This is the first episode in our series on discipline! We are so excited to guide you through this respectful parenting journey. Even in the moments that seem so simple you can parent with love and respect without compromising your connection to your children. Today we are talking about how to set & hold limits, lovingly! Boundaries are so important as our relationships with our children progress and we will talk about a few ways to set them with babies, toddlers and into childhood. This is a core discipline principle, we can’t wait for you to try it! No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame – https://amzn.to/2OuPW0E Simplicity Parenting – https://amzn.to/2Fv2Zv8 This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

As parents, days sometimes feel like they will never end, and yet as we look back at our child’s life, it seems to have flown by. Within 5 minutes, we can go from feeling like we are going to pull our hair out, to feeling like our hearts are going to burst with joy and love for our kids. How can we balance the ideas of living in the present moment and cherishing our children with just surviving the difficult, patience testing storms?A lot of well meaning people give parents of young kids the advice to just “enjoy every second of parenting”, which often makes us feel guilty that we didn’t enjoy the morning full of screaming and soggy cereal on the floor. Enjoying EVERY second seems like a tall order. Today we will give you concrete tips on how to both reframe your perspective and also increase your parenting tools which will make finding moments to enjoy a bit easier. There is a way to maintain balance and contentment while experiencing the entire messy spectrum that is parenting, and we hope to help you discover it. Affiliate Links - High Performance Habits by Brendan Buchard - https://amzn.to/2Fd7V7G Elevating Childcare by Janet Lansbury - https://amzn.to/2Ugh8WF This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In our reviews we’ve had many questions from listeners struggling to break out of a rut! Whether you’ve had a loss, are in the grind of parenting little children everyday or have simply plateaued this episode is for you! If we can find peace within our own hearts we will be able to make it through hard things and come out better for them. Getting to a place where you can TRULY accept the worst outcome is true inner peace. If we can teach this to our kids imagine the endless life they will have!Eckhart Tolle // The Power of NowBrendan Buchard // High Performance HabitsListen in iTunes here, or for androids, listen here. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

None of us get through this life without dealing with loss of some kind or another. We lose loved ones, experience the grief associated with loss of expectations, and many experience betrayal and our own regret. In a family, we not only have our own grief to process, but we also watch our partners and children grieve. Today we are going to delve into our own personal experiences with grief and some things we have found helpful while processing our own as well as guiding our families through the waters of loss. Here are the books we mention:When Children Grieve by John W. JamesA New Earth by Eckhart TolleListen here on iTunes:https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/find-the-magic/id1448424341?i=1000431537535For androids, listen here:https://anchor.fm/findthemagic/episodes/Wholehearted-Loss--Grief-e3e6hu This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

It’s our 10th episode! We have had so much amazing feedback so we decided to answer a few of our most asked questions on limiting screen time, dealing with BIG emotions and toddler tantrums and how to break out of a funk when you’re stuck!Books we mention:Simplicity Parenting by Kim John PayneThe Gifts of Imperfect Parenting by Brene Brown This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe