Sol Movement & Ritual

I am finally back. It has been a long year full of learning and I am excited to share it with you.To kick us off, as promised and promised, I finally gather the courage to express my feelings about plastic surgery and my sub fascial breast augmentation.I hope that what I learned can guide you if you are making a similar choice or battling some of the same questions in your head.I dive into my journey from perky boobs of my youth through nursing, losing volume, and wanting to feel more at home in my body again. The decision to get implants. The consults.And what happened after.The physical sensations. The complications. The exhaustion of holding something in your body that doesn’t feel right. The emotional weight of navigating that while raising kids, working, and moving through a divorce.About what happens when women make intimate decisions about their bodies inside systems that don’t always slow down, listen, or account for the full reality of our experience.And what it costs to override your own knowing. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

​​This episode is a balm to stress and overwhelm. If you are feeling trapped in the storm of life this episode is for you. Felica shares her favorite quick tips for regulating her nervous system when things are just too much!If you liked this episode don't forget to share it and leave a review! We appreciate you so much.Review of the week*nicole0304h*, 10/03/2023Can I be friends with them?I LOVE this podcast. As a mom, and a former therapist—they speak to my heart from such a real, empowering and practical perspective. I glean so many tips and tidbits from what they share and appreciate their honesty and ability to respect different points of views on topics. They truly do their research and have conversations that make me think, laugh and secretly want to be friends with them!Related Episodes Tips for Overcoming Distraction This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Our favorite sex therapist is back and this time we are challenging the assumption that sexual desire dies with long term relationships. Felica interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife and they dive into the challenges we face to "keep the fire alive".Esther Perel said " Eroticism is the antithesis to everything a healthy family life needs, ritual, routine and knowing. Safety and security. Eroticism is adventure" , in this episode we tease out the nuance in this and discover what eroticism TRULY means. Hint ** it isn't all about sex/ desire.We also touch on the fact that families are more child centered than ever with higher expectations for couples. All responsibility often falls on parents, not community, institutions or society. We set up play dates and take pictures of and talk about and invest in our kids yet our personal and couple relationships are left to shrivel up. How can we do better?We tackle all this and more! Don't miss this chance to bring more erotic energy into your life. Links We Mentioned https://www.goodinside.com/podcast/4759/sex-after-kids-tell-me-more-esther-perel/Related EpisodesHow to Own Your Own Desires with Dr.Finlayson Fife Discovering Self within Our Sexuality & Overcoming Betrayal Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much! Each week we choose a winner to receive a FREE JOURNAL for leaving a review! Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

In this mini episode Felica helps us think about how we take on our role as mother. It is a blessing for all the women we have been and a challenge to shed our over identification with our labels. ENJOY! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

So often in parenting, we find ourselves...losing our cool, to put it nicely. We respond with anger; we use bribing or coercion to make our kids behave, and we hurt our relationship with our kids and ourselves in the process. In this episode, we take a deep dive into individual steps we can take anytime we find ourselves triggered by our kids’ behavior. We start with ourselves, pause, attune to our child, and then respond, not react, by setting limits and allowing logical consequences by looking at the need being expressed by our child’s behavior. This conversation will help you reframe difficult parenting situations and allow you to focus on the priority of your relationship. Take a pause to connect to your intuition when making decisions. Pay attention to what you fear and ask yourself why? Parenting helps us see ourselves more clearly. Don’t parent from a place of lack. The Pause - Give your self time and space with your children Use breath to bring yourself into the present moment and pause Sometimes bad behavior is a cry for connection.Time Stamps 8:00- How do we live from a place of authenticity when parenting 12:31 - Take a pause to connect to your intuition when making decisions 18:15 - Parenting from a place of lack vs. wholeness 21:00 - Meditation practice to give your child self love and acceptance 24:33 - Journal out your fears with your kids to process them 29:00 - The Pause - Give your self time and space with your children 37:30 - Zone of zero reactivity 46:50 - Come to each situation with a response vs. a reaction 52:31 - Natural consequences vs. Cultivating consequencesYou can listen to this episode on most other platforms here :)Are you feeling lost, unanchored or listless in your days? We use our daily planner and journal to align our core values with the tasks we do each day! You can learn more about it HERERelated EpisodesAuthoritative Parenting / Arguably the most EFFECTIVE Parenting Style Holding Boundaries / Discipline Pt. 1Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family ConnectionsParenting with Unconditional Love How to Embrace Childhood Books and links we mentioned;The Awakened Family // Shefali TsabaryThe Conscious Parent // Shefali Tsabary This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Original Post date 10/25/22Fear is a powerful emotion. All of us face it at some point of another, and often, it really puts a damper on the way we live our lives. It can interfere with us loving wholeheartedly and doing things that inspire (and scare) us. In this episode, Taralyn dives deep into the concept of facing and processing our fears so they don’t hold us back in life. She addresses 3 different kinds of fear, and walks you through steps to free yourself from the fears that don’t serve you.Books Taralyn Mentioned:Gift of Fear // Gavin De BeckerFear: Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm // Thich Nhat HanhRelated Episodes:Escaping the Trance of Unworthiness and Finding Self Acceptance WithinStaying Open to the Present Tapping Into the Abundance Inside Us This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

The holiday season can feel overwhelming because we feel the need to do everything to make them exciting and special. However, the beauty of having our own families is that we can intentionally choose the holiday activities that serve us and let go of the ones that don’t. The magic of family traditions is that they help our children feel a sense of belonging and gives them roots, which helps them identify with the connection of the family instead of peer groups and can help with their behavior.In this episode, we share the traditions that serve us with simplicity and joy and give you many options to try with your own family. We talk about how sometimes all it takes is to recognize the traditions we already have and capitalize on naming them and making them reoccurring and special. From Halloween fun, ways to be grateful in November and loads of Christmas and winter traditions we hope that this episode inspires you to create new memories with your family and recognize your current traditions to turn them into magical ones that repeat every year! You can listen to this episode on iTunes here and many other platforms here.Books we mentioned:Hold on to Your Kids // Gabor MateThe Entitlement Trap // Linda and Richard Eyre Food Nanny Rescues Dinner // Liz Edmunds Related Episodes:Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connections This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

There is nothing quite like parenting--it’s something we want to desperately do well at, and it is simultaneously one of the most difficult things that many of us will ever do. We face fears, failure, triggers of our own emotions, often while experiencing physical and emotional fatigue. However, because of this, children have the capacity to be our greatest teachers. They allow us the opportunity to truly look inside of ourselves when we are triggered, and wake up to our own nature. In this episode, Felica had the incredible opportunity of discussing this topic with parenting expert and author, Susan Stiffelman, MFT. She explains how we can use the practice of being present to truly use this journey we have as parents to truly evolve ourselves as we face the daunting task of raising humans to do the same. Her books and her words are unbelievably inspiring and will help you as you navigate your own parenting experience. You can learn more about Susan Stiffelman and her work and sign up for her newsletter on her website: https://susanstiffelman.com. She is offering a webinar you can join her in about coparenting with a narcissist here.You can listen to this episode on iTunes here or on many other platforms here. Books we mentioned:Parenting with Presence // Susan Stiffelman Parenting without Power Struggles // Susan Stiffelman Loving What Is // Byron Katie Playful Parenting // Lawrence Cohen Related Episodes:Finding Joy and Enthusiasm in Every DayThe Martyr Effect. HOW TO Stop Offering Ourselves at the Altar of ParentingStaying Open to the Present Tapping Into the Abundance Inside UsJanet Lansbury’s episode: The Best Way to Deal With Intense Tantrums This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

It can appear like people who are successful at achieving their goals simply possess an incredible amount of self control. That kind of belief lets us off the hook from creating the life we really want--we simply lack the self discipline, right? Well, it turns out that as we create habits that add value to our lives, we actually require LESS self control, not more. As we change our environment and our cues and rewards, we have the power to eliminate negative habits and build positive ones that can transform our life. Habits are the key to making our goals a reality. We discuss the science behind habits and explore the work of experts on the subject. We break down the steps for creating a good habit (or ridding yourself of a bad one), and give you applicable tips that you can use right away in your life. We share what has really worked in our own lives as we have experimented with habits and unlocked the magic of things like habit stacking.Books that inspired us:Atomic Habits // James ClearDeep Work // Cal NewportEssentialism // Greg McKeownGetting Things Done // David AllenThe Power of Habit // Charles DuhiggOur Related Episodes:Habits for High PerformanceSystems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family ConnectionMake Your Morning Routine Happen!We would love for you to share our episode with your friends and family. Also, thank you so much for your kind reviews! We are so honored to have such wonderful listeners.How to leave a review on iTunes:* Open podcast app* Search for Find the Magic* Click on episodes* Scroll to the bottom of the page* Click on write a review* Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)* Hit SENDThank you! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

We often receive the message that we can have it all; we can do it all. Social media messages, societal expectations, and our own self talk often feeds the lie that we can do EVERYTHING. When we don’t live up to the unrealistic expectation that we can do everything and succeed at everything, there is a cost to our mental health. In this episode, we discuss this topic with New York Times best selling author, Greg McKeown. He helps identify the lie that we can do everything, and instead offers a path of wisdom, balance, and priorities instead of the wild racing that we often indulge in when we are trying to say yes to everything. He gives us very applicable steps on how to make doing what truly matters to us easy. BOOKS AND LINKS:Greg’s Website: https://gregmckeown.comEffortless: Make It Easier to Do What Matters Most // Greg McKeown Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less // Greg McKeownRELATED EPISODES Essentialism / How to Do Less But BetterDiscovering YOUR Life Essentials This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Research indicates that preschoolers, on average, make three demands/requests per minute! Wow. It’s no wonder we feel overwhelmed. “Watch me!” “Get that!” “Where’s my dinosaur?!” In this episode we talk about practical ideas and tools that have helped us navigate the barrage of daily requests, questions, and demands in a way that allows you to maintain calm and respect for your kids and yourself. Books & Links we mentionRaising an Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting // John Gottman with Joan DeClaireHunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans // Michaeleen Doucleff Mom Watch Compilation by Johnson FilesRelated Episodes230 // Pt 1: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans // Michaeleen DoucleffSystems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connections (Entitlement Trap by Linda Eyre and Richard Eyre)How To: Create Pockets of PeaceTime Stamps10:00 How many requests our kids make per minute13:15 Why we future focus and how inputs from our kids overwhelm us 14:15 Are our kids self centered?23:18 Using body language and social cues25:55 Mom watch this watch this!!29:00 Do you have a hard time tuning out noise/ kids?32:18 Good parenting does not mean responding to everything request 40:01 Ask, is my child seeking connection?Sponsor:GABB WIRELESSWe LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Having a secure relationship with our partner is the foundation for a long, happy life. Building on this relationship we create meaningful and lasting lives that support our psychological development as well as provide a strong foundation for our children, careers and physical health. We loved reading Relationship RX by Stan Tatkin and we had to distill this one for you! In this episode we discuss how knowing your attachment style can guide you to a self awareness that enhances your ability to connect, repair and forgive. We also share our favorite tactics from the book for putting your relationship first, healing past wounds and supporting each other in parenting. Related Episodes Putting Connection With Our Spouse FirstHow to own your desires with Jennifer Finlayson-FifeTime Stamps12:00 - Attachment styles14:05 - Anchors16:30 - Waves20:01 - Islands32:33 - The relationship as an entity should be the highest priority35:35 - Conflicts within a relationship44:30 - Am I putting my role as a parent, or my hobby over my primary attachment?46:17 - Supporting your spouse in parenting51:40 - Secret password for stressful parenting moments57:50 - Bring issues up preventativelySponsor:GABB WIRELESSWe LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

There are lots of decisions that we make as parents that are made out of guilt or a sense of obligation. In this episode we talk about how to navigate parenting questions from a place of wholeness in order to figure out what will be best for parent AND child. We talk about whether or not to do preschool and *spoiler alert* there is no one perfect decision. :)Related Episodes228 // Making Friendships, Creating Community, and How to Know When You’re Done Having KidsPatience with Aggressive Behavior, Friendships in Motherhood and Making Peace with Your Inner LandscapeGuidance for the Changing seasons of MotherhoodTime Stamps1:44 - To preschool or not to preschool?3:00 - Taralyn’s experience with kids going or not going to preschool10:30 - Felica’s experience14:15 - the questioning of our choices because it’s the worth the wrestle16:09 - What will be the best for you and your child?18:55 - Eliminating the guiltSponsor:GABB WIRELESSWe LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)Review of the week from mamaErinESo much wisdom and humilityYou women are amazing, thank you This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Healing your body and spirit postpartum is a topic that is both under talked about and misunderstood. In this episode Katelin interviews Arielle Martone, doctor of physical therapy, yoga teacher and postnatal coach turned postpartum wellness coach after having 2 kids and overcoming postpartum depression and pelvic pain herself. She has 12+ years of experience and utilizes her knowledge and background to help new moms reconnect to mind/body and actually heal postpartum so they can feel strong and confident not only in their bodies but who they are becoming.You can learn from Arielle at the following links:www.findyourwaymama.comwww.instagram.com/ariellemartoneFree ResourcesPelvic Floor Recovery Guide Exhausted to Energized without Sleep Training Related EpisodesHOW TO Prepare Children for a New Sibling: a Conversation with UpbringingPrepping Kids for New Babies, Earning vs. Rewarding, Quiet Time Tips, & Our Favorite Life HacksTime Stamps1:42 - Intro to Arielle and the importance of postpartum care11:40 - The signs to be aware of with Postpartum mood disorders13:50 - Normalize seeking help vs. normalizing the struggle16:30 - Feeling like something is “off” is a signal20:20 - Trust yourself26:50 - Tips to recover if you feel like you have no time31:27 - Pay attention to when you’re saying “should”39:50 - Prioritize your sleep and give yourself grace41:25 - How “bounce back culture” can be a detriment to our overall health47:09 - Don’t rush back into physical exercise51:05 - Trust your body57:15 - Pelvic Floor Therapy exercises1:03:00 - Exhausted to energized1:05:16 - How to get back to our true selves after having kids This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

The beginning of the school year is filled with many conflicting emotions for both our kids and us as parents. In this episode we share favorite tips, ideas and traditions that will help you start the year off right and from a place of wholeness. Related Episodes207 // We Are All Good Inside: Parenting Without Using Shame and Repairing When We Do, with Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 1 210 // Navigating Tricky Transitions With Kids Ahead of Time and What to Do When Whining Feels Unbearable: Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 2 108 // Using Play to Diffuse Power Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Larence J. Cohen)118 // Become a Child Whisperer / Parenting Your Kids True to Their Nature (based on the work of Carol Tuttle)Links MentionedWeekly Clothes Organizer Fave Books back to schoolKissing hand by Audrey PenI Love You All Day Long by Francesca RusackasSuper Manny Stands up by Kelly DiPucchio Oh the Places You’ll Go by Dr. SeussTime Stamps12:25 - How to navigate the logistics of going back to school with systems15:35 - Weekly Clothes Organizer20:17 - Special back to school dinner with notes of encouragement from family22:21 - Helping your kids emotionally return to school by addressing your own anxieties25:21 - Emotional vaccination with your kids27:24 - Visualizing mediation the night before27:55 - Review the child whisperer to help your kids deal with the upcoming31:42 - Reading a back to school book34:19 - Making love bracelets35:00 - First day special events This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Fall is the perfect time to reset our rituals, intentions and systems. In this magic moment Felica shares 2 rituals that are resetting her emotional wellness. The first centers on grieving our losses; the small day to day things we try to push past. The second is a ritual for visualizing our intentions and future goals around parenting and reframing our day to day tasks. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Centering our minds and finding a place of peace in our days is crucial in modern parenting. Our phones are filled with demands that pull us away from ourselves, our desires and our families. On top of that the demands of our lives from appointments to chores call us away from creating connection and relationships. In this episode we refresh our determination to keep saying yes to connection and no to superficial distraction. We share why and our favorite tips and tricks for cultivating a present life. Related EpisodesHow to Enhance Your Ability to Be Present227 // Magic Moment: Recommitting to Your Phone Detox⁠204 // Daily Life As a Spiritual Practice⁠⁠Solitude Through Digital MinimalismTime Stamps11:04 - How can we curb distraction?12:15 - Delete your apps15:00 - Set aside time for phone time16:30 - Turn off notifications17:33 - A box for your phone19:23 - A key to having self control - change your environment22:46 - How to be present when our minds are preoccupied24:41 - Maybe lower your standards for what needs to be done27:20 - Magical mind will serve a magical body29:00 - Practice being stillThank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)REVIEW OF THE WEEK:Kimberly Br0ssiI’ve enjoyed this podcast since 2019 and it helped me get through several hard moments. The mini magics are always awesome. All 3 hosts are so great and share how we can care of ourselves so we can better take care of others. Each are at different points in life and motherhood so there’s something for everyone. There are so many episodes that I re-listen to when I need the reminders!Great for any woman, young or old, new mom or veteran. Thank you!real and refreshing This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Have you ever tried to teach your kid a value? Or help them stop taking toys? Or handle a conflict within a friendship or with a sibling? As parents we have a (sometimes) underutilized tool that can help us in these situations: play. In this episode Katelin walks through how to use role playing specifically to help work through these situations with our children of all ages. Related EpisodesUsing Play to Diffuse Power Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen)Books & Articles Mentioned6 Steps To Do A Role PlayPlayful Parenting // Lawrence CohenThank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)This podcast is my happy placeI am SO grateful for the time and effort that goes into this podcast. Every episode is packed with gold. There is so much education and real conversations about life and motherhood. It helps to calm my soul, reassure me, motivate me and so much more. THANK YOU! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe

Summer is half over and with all the fun comes exhaustion and overwhelm. In this episode, we address the concept of summer burnout, which can be applied to really any season of life. This episode was inspired by a voice message we received from one of our fabulous listeners. If you’d like to send us a question in the form of a voice message, just click ⁠here⁠.Related Episodes Authoritative Parenting / Arguably the MOST Effective Parenting Style230 // Pt. 1 What Ancient Cultures Can Teach us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans // Michaeleen DoucleffDiscovering YOUR Life EssentialsSolitude Through Digital MinimalismThank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)REVIEW OF THE WEEK:-Mandy SchuhI have listened to this podcast for years, it is hands down my favorite podcast! It is insightful, fun and full of great ideas. I feel like I have made a friend in Felica. I appreciate the realness from these ladies and within Find The Magic. Thank you for being a breath of fresh air!Still My Favorite! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit hermothertongue.substack.com/subscribe