PsycHacks

Time to talk about the red pill. For the purposes of this discussion, I'm defining the red pill as a set of knowledge and know-how that facilitates the construction of a worldview pertaining to men's place in society and intersexual dynamics, in particular. In many respects, the red pill can be likened to a spiritual transformation, in that -- having undergone it -- the person is no longer who he once was. In light of this, I'm going to offer two teachings that -- while originally rooted in spirituality -- are usefully applicable to the red pill. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #redpill #psychology #relationship

After a lot of consideration, I've come to the conclusion that humans are more or less tragically superficial with respect to their desire and attraction. This can be overridden with rationality and effort, but the default programming seems to be shallow. Both men and women are superficial when it comes to mating and dating -- albeit in different ways -- and complaining about this reality won't change a thing. It's a better idea to accept this situation and learn to play the game successfully. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #attraction #relationship #desire

Hardly a week goes by without me talking to a man about his jealousy with respect to his woman's sexual history. These men know that their reaction is "irrational" -- there is no current threat to the relationship, and the behavior in question usually occurred before they even knew the women -- but the feelings they experience are real and painful, nonetheless. In this episode, I explain why this phenomenon occurs, and where the threat actually lurks. Be sure to watch to the end. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #relationship #jealousy #women

One of my general orientations to communication is to never say anything about anyone that you wouldn't feel comfortable saying directly to his or her face. However, there is one exception to this orientation. It's a more advanced strategy, and it's what I'm going to discuss in this episode. Basically, you're allowed to say things about others behind their backs that you wouldn't say to their faces, if what you say is positive. This is such an underutilized social hack that most people won't know how to deal with it. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #gossip #relationship #social

Self-sabotage is a fascinating and complex behavior. In general, self-sabotage is a defense strategy that protects the ego's illusory self-regard from having a disconfirming experience with reality. It also provides a sense of safety by both creating limiters on action and offering self-saboteurs some degree of control. As painful as it is to fail, it is even more painful to do so on someone else's terms...potentially after trying your best. Self-sabotage allows people to maintain a certain self-image as compensation for an objective lack of success. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #growth #truth

In today's sponsored video, I tackle the question: "where have all the good men gone?" While you can make the argument that the decline in masculinity may be due in part to genetic influences, I make the case that cultural/social factors are more directly at play. A culture can disappear from the face of the Earth in three generations. If boys continue to be taught -- directly or indirectly -- that their masculinity is a toxic stain, then good men will continue to become scarcer. As a society, we should strive to raise good men, not nice boys. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #men #women #masculinity

If you want to avoid some of the major avoidable pitfalls of being alive, then "produce more than you consume" is a good general orientation to life. In this episode, I begin by applying this principle in some obvious domains (i.e., physical health and financial well-being) before moving on to the topic of content consumption and creative production. Many people are now consuming so much content that they no longer know which thoughts are their own -- or even how to think independently. This is not associated with a good life for several reasons. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #lifestyle #growth

Why is it that your best efforts are often repaid with indifference, rejection, and contempt? This is a complicated phenomenon, but we can view one possible explanation through the lens of the balance of attraction. In turns out that people have preferences with respect both to the position they would rather occupy, and to the size of the gap they would like to experience. Being nice to others puts the other in the place of the adored and increases the gap of attraction. Negativity in response to this behavior is an attempt to recalibrate the gap back to acceptable limits. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. GRE Bites: https://www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #attraction #relationship #dating

Serial monogamy is a dating strategy that so clearly favors women that I'm consistently surprised when men voluntarily assume it for themselves. The crux of the issue is that it is much easier for the average woman to enter into a new relationship after the end of the old one than it is for the average man. Over time, this leads to significant disparities in experience and opportunity that make it more likely that a woman will end up in a relationship that serves her needs than the other way around. I'll discuss the reasons for all of this in this episode. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #dating #women #relationship

There is an inherent asymmetry between wanting and giving: wanting is free, but giving is costly. This is why wanting is such a good interpersonal strategy, and why -- the more successful you become as a man -- the more you should expect more women to want more things from you. However, your time, energy, and money are limited quantities that cannot be doled out on request. So learning to reject women is a skill. In this episode, I discuss some of the beliefs that prevent men from doing this effectively. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #women #psychology #relationship

Many folks believe cannabis to be a relatively harmless drug: it's next to impossible to overdose on it, and it doesn't seem to create physiological dependence. It's not a "hard" drug, like some of the other "bad" ones. However, weed is much more dangerous than most people think. Among other things, it tricks people into thinking that they're using their time well, and it keeps people comfortable in situations they have no business being comfortable in. I discuss more in this episode. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #growth #recovery

Developing an emotional virtue (patience, compassion, forgiveness) is not much different from strengthening a physical muscle. You have to put in the reps with some degree of intentionality. The main difference between the two practices is -- while you go to the physical gym -- the emotional gym comes to you. You do not get to decide when you're in the emotional gym. You only get to choose whether to exercise while you're there. Through this lens, the frustrations, disappointments, and betrayals in your life become the weights you lift to build emotional strength and resilience. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode #growth #psychology #redpill

In today's sponsored episode, I respond to a viewer who is asking after the likelihood of successfully turning things around in his marriage after twelve years of "nice guy" behavior. This is a really common problem, and one that comes up again and again in my paid consultations. First, I explain how men tend to find themselves in this predicament to begin with, by discussing the most common male sexual strategy. Then I discuss what to expect if and when you decide to make a change to an established reinforcement protocol. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode #relationship #dating #redpill

The cheapest and fastest way to improve your motivation as a man is to stop masturbating. While masturbation may relieve men of the frustration they are likely to experience without an appropriate sexual outlet, this very frustration -- if sublimated -- is rocket fuel for success and achievement. This is because the sex drive is an attribute of the libido, or life force. Yoking the consistent intensity of the male sex drive to the prospect of long-term gain provides the focus and motivation to level up and excel. Highly recommended. Social Media Facebook: https://facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw/join Book a paid consultation: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode #motivation #success #redpill

In my model on the balance of attraction, I note that -- since it isn't possible for two people to like each other exactly the same amount -- one person (the adorer) must like the other person more, and one person (the adored) must like the other person less. While these two positions are gender neutral, I make the argument in this episode that it is actually better for women to be in the position of the adorer. This is due to the fact that adorers experience the lion's share of emotionality in a relationship, and women tend to mate and date up (suggesting that they actually want to look up to a man). Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #attraction #women #relationship

The most toxic relationship belief is also -- unfortunately -- one of the most prevalent. It's so simple that you may not even believe me when I reveal it to you. In so many words, it's the belief that, in your relationship, you are free to be yourself. This is not really true, but believing it is can corrode your relationships from the inside out. In reality, relationships are roles, and you jeopardize the privilege of a relationship to the extent that your behavior is at odds with the expectations associated with your role. I'll discuss more in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #toxic #relationship #psychology

What most people don't understand is that disrespect is a process. The best predictor of overt disrespect is covert disrespect. And this is why it is important to address disrespectful behavior while it is still in its nascent form. Failing to do so will jeopardize your relationship, primarily due to the fact that it is not possible for a woman to love a man she does not respect. I will discuss further in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #respect #women #relationship

Working though a betrayal is extremely difficult. It will likely take considerable time, energy, and expense, and there is no guarantee that it will work. Therefore, it is reasonable to expect at least a decent prognosis before setting out. In this episode, I will discuss the two things needed to heal a betrayal, such that -- if either one of these things is missing -- there's frankly little hope of a successful resolution. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #relationship #betrayal #trust

People need things from other people. And the medium through which value is exchanged is a relationship. When the value of the proposed exchange is strictly equal, no transaction occurs -- as this would actually be a net loss for both parties. No transaction, no relationship. This suggests that inequality is the basis of relationship, as it is the unequal exchange of value that motivates transaction. I will explain more in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #dating #relationship #economics

I'm 40 years-old, and I can count the number of apologies I've received from women over the course of my life on one hand. Surprisingly, this is not due to the fact that I have always interacted with virtuous, high-quality, well-behaving women. For whatever reason, women seem to find it particularly difficult to apologize to men -- and this is really too bad. In this episode, I'll discuss the nature of the difficulty, and why it would be in women's best interests to apologize more often. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #relationship #women #dating

This one took me a long time to figure out. You can't have any relationship with anyone. Or, to put it another way, you can't necessarily have the relationship you would like to have with the person you happen to be attracted to. You can only have certain types of relationships with certain types of people. Trying to fit the person to whom you are attracted into the relationship format you prefer is the path of pain. A better idea is to try to fit the relationship to the person. I talk more about how to do this in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #dating #relationship #attraction

People say that relationships take work, but this is only if you choose poorly. Select the right partner and sex, love, and affection will flow to you as effortlessly as water moves downhill. The key to this process is understanding the importance of being a woman's perceived best option. Almost all the issues that men are subject to experiencing in their relationships are rooted in their woman's belief that she could do better. I'll discuss more in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #relationship #dating #attraction

Popular culture has trained people to associate evil with darkness. However, evil rarely presents itself as something hideous, twisted, and dark, and darkness is actually an aspect of divine nature. This conceptualization throws people off track, and leaves them vulnerable to the ensnarements of the negative force. In this episode, I will discuss how this misunderstanding likely came to pass, and how to keep yourself safe through more accurate discernment. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #spirituality #spiritual #evil

Some of you might be wondering why I talk so much about sex and money on this channel. After all, isn't this a psychology podcast? And aren't these relatively superficial considerations? What do these topics have to do with mental health? Well, it turns out that they have a lot to do with well-being. In this episode, I provide two answers to these reasonable questions. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #sex #money #psychology

The world is full of people. If you can forge a genuine emotional connection with others, then that world will an exciting place full of potential friends, partners, and lovers. The key to making a connection with anyone is empathy. However, most people don't really understand what this means. In this episode, I will discuss what empathy really is using a concrete example, and how this principle might be applied in real world situations. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #relationship #connection #communication

Kindness is actually a fairly complicated construct. It is not synonymous with being nice. Being nice isn't always kind, and being kind isn't always nice. The issue is that there are two faces of kindness, and one without the other is pathological. In this episode, I use concrete examples to demonstrate how kindness without loving honesty is typically a form of enabling that does more harm than good. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #kindness #emotions #psychology

In turns out that both men and women are capable of loyalty, though each group tends to remain loyal to different things. Whereas men are typically loyal to their duties, women are typically loyal to their feelings. It is what it is. Accepting this reality can help men and women have more harmonious and rewarding relationships with each other. Each other holds out a growth opportunity for the other, which I will discuss at the end of the episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #loyalty #relationship #dating

In this episode, I discuss my simplified framework of human motivation: cats and cheese. Cheese is an anticipated reward associated with pleasure or fulfillment that we approach; cats are anticipated punishments associated with pain or loss that we avoid. If you understand the relative intensity and distribution of the cats and cheese in a person's perception, then you can actually predict their behavior fairly accurately at any given moment in time. Further consequences of this understanding are duly examined. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #motivation #success #psychology

From a woman's perspective, a man's emphasis on her sexual history may be somewhat baffling. After all: that was then, and this is now. What does what I did before we met have anything to do with our current relationship? A lot, it turns out. In this episode, I will help women understand why men tend to place so much importance on women's previous sexual behavior with other men. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: https://stellargre.com. Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California. Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others. See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations. Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com #dating #relationship #sex

Being the target of malicious gossip can be difficult. I've learned this the hard way. If it happens to you, it's important to not make things more difficult for yourself than they already are. In this episode, I'll discuss three tips to navigate this situation more effectively. They're not easy pills to swallow, but they can help you find some measure of peace in a difficult circumstance. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans. #gossip #aggressive #relationship

Contentment is the practice of turning toward the present moment and accepting it as sufficient. However, when I teach this to folks, the most common objection I hear is: "But, Orion, my present moment isn't sufficient. That's the problem! There are things that I want that I don't yet have." Fair enough. That said, I believe that the practice of contentment is perfectly compatible with goal-directed action. I'll explain how in this episode. Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans. #happy #psychology #mindfulness

Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans. In my previous episode, I discussed the importance of side hustles. In this episode, I'm going to tell the story of one of my businesses, a test prep company called StellarGRE. In the span of ten years, I went from living in public housing and putting up flyers to earning six-figures in my spare time. This was the first stage in reclaiming my life. With unwavering discipline and the right model for action, we are all capable of great things. #hustle #business #success

Most people give the best hours of most of the days of the best years of their lives to their jobs, and then content themselves with the crumbs left at their own tables. To reclaim your life, you must reclaim your time, and this ultimately depends on divorcing your time from your income. The first step in this process is developing multiple income streams, and you can start with a side hustle. In this episode, I give practical, actionable advice on how to get started. #hustle #money #success

Action is required because, if we do nothing, things fall apart. So goal-directed behavior is part and parcel of the human experience. However, in the near-infinite domain of human action, there are really only two goals, two avenues for all our efforts: we can either do something that we're not, or not do something that we are. Everything else is bluster, because (at heart) all goals are behavioral. #goals #success #psychology

"Cancer cures neurosis," is a quote from the great psychotherapist, Irvin Yalom, who (like me) got his start as a psychologist working with cancer patients. Among other things, he meant that a real problem tends to put things in perspective for folks. In this episode, I discuss how the core of neurosis is conflating a fake problem with a real problem, and how those who are actively dying tend to get very busy living. #cancer #psychology #health

In today's day and age, I still encounter women who lament the decline of chivalry. To some extent, I can appreciate their complaint as the end of certain social niceties. However, what these ladies don't seem to appreciate is the extent to which the unfreedom of women served as the rationale for chivalric action, and that a damsel must first be locked up in a tower in order to be saved. Otherwise, the whole chivalric effort becomes a ridiculous farce. #romantic #dating #relationship

Envy is one of the most destructive emotions we are subject to experiencing, and it its invisibility makes it particularly insidious. However, like any other emotion, it can be dismantled by understanding the necessary conditions from which it arises. My working definition of envy is that it is a perceived deficit relative to a self-relevant good relative to a perceived equal. This is somewhat complex, but I break down how this awareness can be used to neutralize the emotion. #psychology #emotions #envy

To celebrate Christmas, let's take a closer look at one of Jesus's teachings: the admonition to turn the other cheek. This teaching has been interpreted in many ways over the ages, and I'm going to offer another one. It's one that, I believe, accord very nicely with a nuanced understanding of human psychology. In this episode, I explain how turning the other cheek functionally places aggression on an extinction protocol by divesting aggression of its reinforcement mechanism. #jesus #peace #psychology

Self-esteem is the belief that, all things being equal, you're a worthwhile person. It's related to self-confidence, but it's technically a separate construct. Unfortunately, many folks out there struggle with low self-esteem, and don't think very highly of themselves (even if they're otherwise successful). Fortunately, there is a simple way to improve your self-esteem. It's a two-step process, and I'll outline both in this episode. #selflove #selfesteem #selfconfidence

The single best predictor of whether a person will benefit from psychotherapy is how miserable the person is when he first presents for treatment. And on some level, this makes sense. While life can always get worse, if you're going through a particularly difficult moment, it's actually more likely to improve if you make a change. This is called regression toward the mean. However, it works the other way as well. In this episode, I discuss the trap of a B- life. #success #blackjack #risk

Growing up, I often heard the saying: "if something is worth doing, it's worth doing well." And this certainly has some truth to it. Some activities shouldn't even be approached without a commitment to excellence at the outset. However, as I've gotten older, I've come to see this adage from a different perspective. I discuss what that is -- and its repercussions -- in this episode. #selfimprovement #success #achievement

The internet abounds with advice for men looking to become more dominant, more alpha. And almost all of this advice includes directives to get bigger, get stronger. While this is certainly a worthwhile goal, this direction can do men a disservice by equating physical presence with dominance. This is not the case. Dominance is psychological, not physical. And you already know this is true. The contest for dominance is fought on the psychological field in society. So do not neglect this important reality. #alpha #redpill #men

Without conscious intention, women are making society increasingly polygamous. This is a provocative statement, but some of the data bear it out. According to the General Social Survey, one in three men under 30 have not had sex in the previous year -- while only one in six women under 30 have done the same. This creates a ratio of 5 sexually active women to 4 sexually active men in this important age group. Put another way: about 20% of women under 30 are in a polygamous relationship -- whether they're aware of it or not. #dating #polygamy #women

I really dislike the phrase "my needs aren't being met." Not only does this obscure the truth, but it propagates a potentially dangerous lie in its place. A relationship in which a person's needs aren't being met is abusive; however, people in abusive relationship don't say that they're needs aren't being met. They say they are in an abusive relationship. So what does this phrase really mean? I'll discuss more in this episode. #needs #wants #relationship

Once someone passes through tragedy, they are no longer the same person, and their perception of reality has fundamentally changed. There is no going back. And this means that there are generally two classes of people: those who have passed through tragedy, and those who haven't passed through tragedy yet. These two groups basically live in two different worlds, in which many features of reality are invisible to those in the second category. I illustrate the psychological truth of this statement with an example from "Harry Potter." #harrypotter #loss #grief

Have you ever bought a car? If so, you had to do business with someone with whom your fundamental interests were misaligned. How did you go about doing this? Even if that car checked every one of your boxes, I doubt that you pursued the sale with unabashed enthusiasm, as this would be a stupid strategy. Dating isn't much different. The best way to negotiate a good deal for yourself is to approach the discussion from a place of indifference. I'll discuss more in this episode. #dating #attraction #game

Have you ever noticed that the people you're really interested in never seem to reciprocate your feelings? On the other hand, have you ever noticed that the people you can kinda take or leave seem to really want to have a relationship with you? Isn't that just the ironic tragedy of dating? However, it doesn't have to be this way. Almost certainly, you are making a fundamental mistake when it comes to how you are treating the people you are attracted to. I'll explain more in this episode. #attraction #dating #relationship

The holidays are upon us, my friends! For many, this is a wonderful time of year when folks get to spend precious time with loved ones. For others, it's a landmine of conflict and despair. This episode is for those in the latter category. Today I'll be talking about holiday safety planning -- a must when dealing with toxic family dynamics. Here are five concrete and actionable tips to stay sane this holiday season. #toxic #holidays #abuse

The younger man/older woman dynamic actually has a lot to speak for itself. Among other things, it generally occurs between two gendered classes that are roughly equivalent with respect to their normalized sexual marketplace values. What's more, both parties generally understand that the relationship is fairly short-term, making it one of the most sexually-charged matchups possible. Why this isn't done more often is beyond me. I discuss more in this episode. #olderwomen #cougars #relationship

After my episode, "Women treat men the way men treat jobs," I received a lot of requests asking for the same treatment from the other direction, namely: what are women to men? I've given it some thought, and this is what I came up with. Keep in mind that my intention here is to help women understand some otherwise bewildering male behavior so they can accept, heal, and ultimately have more rewarding relationships in the future. This is a longer treatment, so be sure to say until the end. #relationship #dating #men