Make Your Damn Bed

Consciousness is a beautiful gift, and if we learn to hone it, it can really become our superpower. We can learn to better trust ourselves, understand our intuition, and become more fulfilled and honest and peaceful humans. You are your own best resource. Don't be afraid to tap into it. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today, just practice coming back to your breath. As it is now. Coming back to your body, as it is now. Practice consciousness. If your mind starts to wander and get lost in the sauce of chaos… come back to the way your body and breath feels in that very moment. You always have you to return to. Stay grounded in that knowledge. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I encourage you to implement a few minutes of this mindfulness and meditation practice into your daily routines, as often as you can, so you can start to see the rewards and keep showing up for yourself. If it feels like work at first, that’s because it can be a bit of work, at first. We have to remember that meditation is an active form of brain training. We have been lead to believe it’s inactive. Sitting and doing nothing - but it’s actually an active process of choosing inactivity to increase awareness of your own thoughts and feelings to get more comfortable within your own body and mind so you can manage negative symptoms that naturally occur to our consciousness.  Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a process and the practice is meant to enhance your life over time by improving your relationship with yourself. Don’t rush it. Don’t get frustrated. Some days will be harder than others. Don’t worry about doing well or doing bad, don’t cling to any expectations. And don’t start looking forward to some grand explosion of enlightenment. If you have brilliant thoughts, dope. Write em down, then go back to breathing. If you feel strong emotions, dope. Feel them and then go back to breathing. Simply breathe, sit, and relax into whatever the hell comes up for you. No matter what. Good or bad, weird or comfortable, calm or busy, It’s all human, which is the point of this practice. To simply embrace what it is to be human. Article cited in episode:  https://webspace.ship.edu/cgboer/meditation.html A Guided Meditation on the Body, Space, and Awareness with Yongey Mingyur Rinpoch  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GSeWdjyr1cGuided Wim Hof Method Breathing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tybOi4hjZFQ Isha Kriya: A Guided Meditation For Health And Wellbeing | 15-Minutes  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwQkfoKxRvo REA EARTH: Self Love for Your Subconscious Mind https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVcur3OPNvg Taming Your Wandering Mind – TEDxCoconutGrove https:// www.youtube.com/watch?v=Df2JBnql8lc&feature=youtu.be Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Almost 50 studies have been done further confirming the benefits of global meditation and its direct impact on everything in the world, according to results published in the Journal of Crime and Justice in 1981. We shouldn’t be meditating for the perks. But being aware of them doesn’t hurt. Clinging to the outcomes or the changes or the enlightenment will only hurt your practice in the long run - so go in with only the expectation to disconnect from the outside world and reconnect to yourself, which will in turn allow you to better connect to the collective without having to try so damned hard. Meditation is about being human and connecting to your own human-ness, for better or for worse. It’s about sitting with yourself, without expectation, and just being. Of course, as a result, it can absolutely become a way to tap into the energetic resources that live within you and share them with the world, but only by practicing the release of the need to do or be anything at all. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Forbes Article: https://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2015/02/09/7-ways-meditation-can-actually-change-the-brain/?sh=76a285111465Official, scientific studies, as well as my own anecdotal experiential evidence supports the fact that meditation helps balance emotions, and increases memory, focus, and productivity. Studies show an increase on creativity, reasoning skills, and standardized test scores. It is also proven to decrease depression, stress, and anxiety while improving your pain tolerance. It’s not a cure-all, of course, nothing is but it’s an amazing resource for helping manage symptoms and improve your relationship with yourself and others.  Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So, although the history can be incredibly off-putting, it shouldn’t steer you away from the practice. Instead, it should empower you to embrace mindfulness with intentionality to honor those who came before us and made it possible for us to do so.In reality, we should all be practicing mindfulness but so we can better our lives, not optimize them. It’s meant to increase our awareness, not numb it. and we should be meditating so we can improve our relationships, not just with ourselves, but with the rest of humanity. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Youtube channel of Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche:  https://www.youtube.com/user/MingyurRinpocheThe article I referenced: https://www.zerotothree.org/resources/3715-perspectives-defunding-mindfulness-while-we-sit-on-our-cushions-systemic-racism-runs-rampant  I could spend a whole season talking about the value of establishing a conscious mindfulness and meditation practice. I’ll spare you the full season but for the next few days I am going to be doing a series on how to get started with a meditation practice, even if you’ve never considered doing it before. The history of mindfulness and meditation is incredibly important and often overlooked, so today we’re starting there because honoring roots is a critical piece in learning and respecting cultures without appropriating them. Plus, if we continue to choose to skip learning the real history of things, we will end up perpetuating negative cycles and losing sight of the meaning of these practices that are meant to do the opposite. So, today, I wanted to start with touching briefly on the history of meditation. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s officially time to get that thing you have been putting off done. Once and for all, today is the day. This week is the week. You know exactly the thing I am talking about, too. That damned thing that you’ve been putting off, doesn’t need to wait any longer. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

People have far less power when we act individually. Acting together as group is where real, substantial change is made. Unions are built on this reality. And while no union is perfect, they are the collective voice of the workers, which is incredibly important in a world determined to take advantage of individuals. Unions work to put power in the people to ensure the rights and wages are protected. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Our thoughts, feelings, and even experiences are not always rooted in reality. More so, they are rooted in survival. The fact that we can often take a step back from a real, tangible, valid feeling and realize that we no longer feel the same affects of those feelings, proves they are real but not trustworthy advisors in our behaviors. Deception and distortion is built into the natural human mind for our survival. It’s our job to recognize that and change our relationship with suffering so we can not fall victim to creating more suffering than necessary just as a means of basic survival. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If we are truly stuck with a choice, our best hope for happiness is to simply lean in. Our brains have this miraculous power to make us feel happy, as long as we don’t focus on the what could’ve beens of life. True suffering comes less from making a “wrong" choice, and more from regretting making it. Regardless of what happens in life, our minds will typically work to synthesize happiness once again, which is in no way less valuable than the happiness we may come to expect from making what seemed to be a better choice. So, keep leaning in, don’t worry so damn much, and enjoy the choices you did make because they lead you here, now, which is a truly beautiful place to be. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Watch the Ted Talk here: The Surprising Science of Happiness by Dan Gilbert - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q1dgn_C0AUSo, if we are stuck with things going one way or the other, we often overrate how much it will actually affect us, when in reality, being stuck with the less preferred choice not only will effect us less than we’d expect, we are pretty damned good at synthesizing happiness around our bad gets, anyway. This study shows that real suffering comes from the questioning of if we made the right choice, rather than the choice itself. The decision doesn’t really matter, but dwelling on that decision does. Proving, that overthinking can be our greatest enemy. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Be honest and up front with your people. If you feel the need to rain check and can foresee that change happening ahead of time, let them know as soon as you figure it out. You don’t have to over-explain your reasonings, but respecting other people’s time means giving them substantial time to make more plans. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I have often expressed how important it is to make others feel heard and seen, and that feeling we get when a stranger thinks you’re worthy of remembering your name immediately, is the most efficient way to make this happen. It’s hard to show someone you give a shit about them if you cant bother to remember their most basic identifier.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Practicing mindfulness is to make your life better, not to make you a better employee. Ideally, we can get to a place where we can choose our well-being over the well-being of our employers. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you want to get something done and cant stop getting distracted? Make it difficult to access your distractions. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you slow down consciously - you start to notice how much the world opens up. Oddly enough - when you intentionally choose less, you make room to experience more. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When we associate our decisions with a part of ourselves that we take pride in, we are less likely to question whether we should put in effort or not. It becomes the natural progression of events. If you care, you’ll be far more likely to put in effort. If you can create a way to care more - you can improve that effort dramatically without fighting yourself internally. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We should be striving to treat individuals as individuals. All humans, regardless of race, age, gender identity, sexuality, religion, preferences, or personal choices should b e treated as humans. Of course, we can protect our boundaries by addressing different behaviors that may affect us personally, but every single living being deserves to be treated with the same level of respect - as long as they aren’t violating your boundaries. Individuals should be treated as individuals. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In my experience there are two types of thinking when it comes to suffering. There are people who think, “I experienced something terrible and I don’t want anyone else to ever experience something like that.” And there are people who think, “I experienced something terrible, and everyone else should have to, too.” Ideally, we’re all in the first camp. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Unless something drastic happens, real change is hard to notice until consistent effort has been put in and enough time and has passed to show those results. If you see an old friend after 20 years, you will be far more likely to notice their signs of aging than if you saw them aging slowly and gradually every single day. Same with gaining or losing weight. You aren’t likely to notice a few pounds a year being added or lost on your body until you look back and realize you’ve gained or lost forty pounds without noticing the impact. Slow, gradual change is far less noticeable by the naked eye. You may feel like you blinked and everything changed, when in reality - it had been slowly and steadily changing for years and years. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Being open, honest and kind is a valuable asset in a closed off, dark, and often mean world. That said, being an honest, open, kind and vulnerable person can definitely put a target on your back when it comes to toxic people looking for prey. “Unspoken boundaries are invisible, and they often sound like “They should’ve known better” or “Common sense would say . . .” Common sense is based on our own life experiences, however, and it isn’t the same for everyone. That’s why it’s essential to communicate and not assume that people are aware of our expectations in relationships. We must inform others of our limits and take responsibility for upholding them.”― Nedra Glover Tawwab, Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming YourselfSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When we put good out in the world, we get an automatic target on our backs on how we could be doing more, better, or differently, but in my opinion - that energy should be put towards the people doing active harm. Those people haven’t slowed down and they slide by unnoticed because we’re all fighting with each other on the details. Remember who’s team you’re on - and fight accordingly! Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The reason that things resonate with you - is because of you. You see the magic in the world because you have the capacity for that magic.  You are a mirror. The magic you see around you is the magic that lives within you. If you get inspired by my words or anything else you come across during the day - your history, perspective, interpretation, and big beautiful brain brought you here. Give yourself credit for seeing and BEING the magic. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Set boundaries with the holidays. Don't burn through your savings trying to impress everyone. Focus on experiences and practicality rather than the top of the line junk. Your presence is present enough. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trade in your self deprecation for self aggrandizing and watch your confidence grow!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s not about fitting in with the crowd - it’s about doing the things that feel the best and create the best outcome as a result. There is nothing to be ashamed of if you’re the pioneer of an experience or a look or a choice. If it’s not actively putting anyone else in danger - you should be excited to stand out, you never know who may be watching that needed a bit of encouragement to stand with you. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Keeping yourself safe is the priority. And anger and resentment can be important feelings to have to signal if people are taking advantage of us. I encourage you to continue to hold people accountable as much as possible. Ideally, holding your boundaries firmly, without having to stoop to their level and feel disconnected from your authenticity. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The truth is brutal, but honesty doesn’t have to be. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Showing up can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people, and you will have agency over how you choose to show up - but to me, it’s important to pay attention to your people as individuals, and if you want to create a long lasting relationship that can withstand the test of time, you have to be willing to show up for them when you can. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Getting comfortable growing means getting comfortable being wrong. Your thoughts may feel like the truth, but they're not always rooted in reality. Often, in fact, they aren't. Practice questioning your own thoughts, without getting defensive. Take some time and space for your own wellbeing today. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's Thanksgiving in the US and instead of dreading the holiday altogether, I now look forward to the idea of having a specific day dedicated to gratitude and connection with family or friends over various starches and pie WHILE simultaneously having passionate conversations about important ideals. Donate to Native American Rights Fund: https://secure.narf.org/page/64457/donate/1 DECODED: A thanksgiving sketch - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFfREh7G3ck Podcast: We Are Still Here- A Message of Unity for Thanksgiving https://rights.culturalsurvival.org/we-are-still-here-message-unity-thanksgiving A Native American view on Thanksgiving - https://www.huffpost.com/entry/with-thanksgiving-a-native-american-view_b_5a0cca9ee4b023a796fed3b4 Toasted Sister's Podcast episode on Thanksgiving: https://toastedsisterpodcast.com/2020/11/23/e70-the-thanksgiving-episode/ Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When people misplace their anger onto you - it's not your responsibility to rectify it. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

People will typically match your energy. Your energy reflects your perceptions. This is why, if you work improve your perception, the reactions of others and your entire reality will follow.  Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The things that resonate for you reflect your past, your experiences, your interpretations, and even more so, your attitude about all of that shit. This is why some people can go through hell and back and have the best mindset and focus on gratitude and love and other people can be insanely privileged and still miserable about everything. Neither one is wrong. Both experiences and feelings are valid. But again, I can tell you which way sounds preferable. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When we put our attention and our full conscious minds behind the things we do, we give them more power than when we simply allow them to happen to us. It truly sounds like magic because it kind of is. The fact is, our visualizations are just as powerful as our physical experiences. Our imaginations can literally create the same neural pathways in our brain, which can impact our physical bodies and surroundings as a result. This is why the power of positive thinking is so crucial. We truly do bring energy to everything we do, whether we know it or not, so the more conscious and intentional we can be with that energy, the better our reality will become as a result. Attitude really does shape everything, why not shape it the way you want?Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Practice never goes bad. It’s not something that expires when you don’t use it. You can build on that information later. Hone the skill over time when it feels right for you - but recognize that consistent hard work shows results the fastest. 20 minutes of mindful practice will outweigh 2 hours of bullshit practice any day. So be mindful - be all in - and commit what you can when you can where you can. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 Learning to love yourself means showing up day after day with compassion, curiosity, and reverence for the person you are in this very moment. It means being kind and patient with yourself as you learn this process but it also means you may benefit from taking some notes.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Decluttering can feel very empowering and lighten some of the energetic ties you naturally create when residing in a space. It’s hard to feel free when you’re bogged down with shit around you, so let yourself feel a bit of freedom that comes with the occasional deep clean and purge. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you do this intentional releasing, I want you to focus on getting the shit out. When you change the oil in your car, you have to drain out the old shit for it to run properly in the future and that draining part is the most time consuming and expensive part of the process. Refilling the shit with the good stuff is very fast and fairly simple. The wait and the disposal of the old, heavy shit is where the labor comes in. But if you have the proper tools and expectations, it’s easier to do so. So let yourself lean in to the draining portion, even though it kinda sucks and recognize that you are going to feel better afterwards. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Water is insanely cleansing, effective, and a powerful energy resource and it’s not to be underestimated in our own personal healing and wellbeing. There is a reason health professionals and therapists alike are always advocating for your hydration. Drink your damn water, wash your damn face, and remember that you’re a powerful mother fucker made of powerful stuff! Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Aggression is a human emotion. You are allowed to feel aggressive. Anger is a human emotion. You are allowed to feel angry. Sadness, frustration, embarrassment, fear are all human emotions. You are allowed to feel all of them. The problem is, when we blindly react to those feelings out of fear they will last forever, or instinct, or whatever. I have said many times before that we are are responsible for the way we react to things - but I think it takes a very emotionally conscious and intelligent person to be able to feel these more quote unquote “ugly” feelings in a way that we don’t feel the need to outwardly react to. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If we create positive associations with movement - we will struggle less with guilt and that feeling of obligation. Build positive mindsets around movemetn. It’s not a punishment, it’s a form of self care, nourishment, and grounding. It’s a free way to connect with yourself in a way that can genuinely improve your longevity and day to day mental and physical health. It doesn’t have to be intense, you don’t always have to go so hard, as long as you’re doing something to show your body you care for it as much as it cares for you, don’t worry about the rest. Start small, don’t pressure yourself if you don’t want to, and remember that a little is better than nothing - as long as it feels good to you. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The only thing you can plan for is your behaviors, choices, and reactions. Stop writing the story for everyone's reactions to your choices and just lean in with honesty and kindness. Worrying won't change the outcome. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I found myself focusing on the negative opinions of others. Opinions I had no control over. So when I caught myself and refocused on the positive comments of the supportive people that really mattered, that's when I was able to escape the negative thought patterns that took my ass in. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I generally say steer clear of obsessing over problems and people. The only thing you should obsess over is your own wellbeing. Feel free to get caught up in a new hobby or joy, but when day in and day out your thinking is always coming back to the things that aren’t within your control - like ‘why didn’t she text me back?’ Or ‘what if I never make as much money as them’ you’ll miss out on a lot of time and energy that you could have been worrying about yourself or other things that are actually within your control and have the potential to solve the problems you’re hell bent on rehearsing in the first place. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When we build a barrier to protect us from feeling hard feelings, they become more challenging to approach in general. So, as a result, we end up completely avoiding things that could potentially trigger that fear and then before we know it, we miss out on an entire life because we didn’t make room for discomfort. Before we realize what we have done - instead of avoiding the fear, we have completely centered that fear as the main character in our story. We have made every choice in our life around avoiding the fear instead of simply facing it. We made it the star of the show instead of just another commercial break. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Think about when you do get distracted - throughout the day - even if it’s good thoughts or positive distractions, it can easily interrupt our flow. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Genuinely though - there are perks to many lifestyles you would hate to have - and cons to many lifestyles you would love to have. Focus less on what you’re missing out on - and focus in on what you actually have. And if there is something you’re genuinely feeling like you’re missing out on - go after that thing! And if it’s meant to be - it’ll happen for you. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.