Life Coaching with Christine Hassler

This coaching call is about breaking the cycle of being in unhealthy relationships, specifically with emotionally unavailable or narcissistic people. Today's caller, Behnaz, feels guilty, exhausted, and angry when dealing with her family and longs for deeper connections. She asks Christine for guidance on how to break the cycle and release her anger. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode429]. We all have encountered someone with either narcissism or at least narcissistic tendencies, emotional unavailability, and gaslighting. It can be a frustrating and maddening place to be. It almost makes us feel crazy because we feel we are not being heard, we are not being seen, and it is frustrating. Why empaths are so attracted to narcissists is because, on a subconscious level, we see that they don't have access to love. We can feel it. We think our love will somehow awaken the love in them but it just doesn't work that way. We just end up giving away our power, and our heart, and we end up collapsing our boundaries. It can be hard when we are a loving person, and we have a pattern of engaging with people who are not in touch with the love inside themselves. It's exhausting. If you know you have been gaslit before, be aware that you may either shut down completely and not talk at all or go into over-talking and over-explaining. It's not bad or wrong. It's just a natural reaction to being gaslit. Part of healing from being gaslit is finding our authentic self-expression, not coming from justification or defending, knowing exactly what we need to say and how much we need to say. On some level, some of us do sign up to be generational pattern breakers. It's the only way the consciousness of the planet evolves. Spring 2024 will bring a new 10-week, Live, Inner Child Program from Christine and Stefanos. More information is coming soon. Christine wants to hear from you! She is considering making some changes to the show, and she wants your feedback. Go to ChristineHassler.com/survey to answer a few questions about the podcast, and if you include your name and email, you will be entered into a raffle to win a 30-minute coaching session with Christine. Behnaz's Question: Behnaz's self-esteem is not where she wants it to be and she struggles to find her voice around narcissists. She wants guidance on how to release her anger and break the pattern. Behnaz's Key Insights and Ahas: Adults gaslit her when she was a child. She holds back her thoughts around narcissists. She feels she has boundaries. She has internalized anger she is unable to express. She is exhausted. She speaks up for herself but is resentful when nothing changes. She tries to connect with emotionally unavailable people. She wanted a deeper connection with her parents. She yearns to love and connect with people. Her soul signed up to be a generational pattern breaker. She feels guilty about cutting off a relationship with her aunt. She is a joyful person. She is creating a family of friends. She feels alone. How to Get Over It and On With It: Grieve the relationship she didn't have with her family. Accept that she chose her family to learn through contrast. Get in touch with her anger. Accept that she cannot change anyone. Know it is OK to step away from unhealthy relationships. Honor who she is and come into alignment with it. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. The new stainless steel cookware set is a must-have. To take advantage of a limited-time offer for listeners of this podcast, go to CarawayHome.com/Overit. Get a 20% discount on a stylish gift for your home or friends and family for the holidays. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

This is the perfect episode to listen to as the holidays are upon us - my guest, Talia Fox, and I talk about how to have healthier, more conscious relationships with ourselves and others. Talia Fox is the CEO of KUSI Global, Inc. She holds an M.Ed. in counseling psychology from Howard University and she is a Harvard University Fellow. An inspirational leader in every sense of the word, Talia is often referred to as the Jedi of Inspiration by her clients. With over two decades of experience in transforming thousands of executives from all sectors, she has become a visionary for leadership and legacy building. Her extensive background in psychology and education has given her the tools she needs to assist leaders in developing successful strategies for complex missions, ranging from defense systems to healthcare initiatives. As CEO of KUSI Global, Inc., Talia helps organizations like the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, Harvard University, Transunion, the National Institutes of Health, Howard University, and the U.S. Departments of Defense and Veterans Affairs maximize human potential by leveraging strategic intelligence and helps individuals and organizations foster connected cultures and promote conscious equity.

This coaching call is about getting out of the loop of needing reassurance. Today's caller, Michele, does not feel safe in relationships and asks her partner for constant reassurance. If you have jealousy, worry, or anxiety in relationships or situations, you will find value in today's episode. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode428]. There are times when we have insecurity or concerns in relationships. During those times, it is reasonable to go to our partner and ask for reassurance. That is within the range of a healthy relationship. But when we find ourselves in a perpetual loop of needing reassurance constantly in order to feel relief and love, it is because we don't feel safe. When we really feel love, it is beautiful and amazing and it is also terrifying. We have to acknowledge that it is risky and there will be things about it that will scare us. But when we recognize the risk and fear, if we greet the scared part of us with compassion and love, we can stop the fear from running the show. When we see the loop for what it is and take self-honoring actions, we take ourselves off the hamster wheel and stop abandoning ourselves. Breaking the loop is a huge act of self-love and self-care. It's never our partner's job to heal us, but they can have an active role in understanding our wounding and being compassionate and patient with us as we heal. Christine wants to hear from you! She is considering making some changes to the show, and she wants your feedback. Go to ChristineHassler.com/survey to answer a few questions about the podcast, and if you include your name and email, you will be entered into a raffle to win a 30-minute coaching session with Christine. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you in a safe situation, relationship, or career but you're afraid you're going to lose it? As a child, were marriage and relationships not modeled to you in a great way? Do you need constant reassurance or otherwise, you feel unsettled? Do you judge that part of you that needs constant reassurance? Michele's Question: Michele asks for guidance on how to stop needing reassurance in her new relationship. Michele's Key Insights and Ahas: She has a compulsive need for reassurance. She doesn't feel safe in relationships. She fears abandonment. She was blindsided by her ex's infidelity. She's been jealous in her relationships. As a child, she didn't have good models of relationship. Her brother left home at a young age. She feels a deep connection with her new partner. Her partner reassures her often. She gets frustrated with herself about her need for reassurance. She fears she will manifest the ending of a relationship. She believes she should have outgrown her fear by now. How to Get Over It and On With It: Have compassion when the part of her that needs control comes up. Ask herself if her fear is substantiated. Recognizing when she is in a loop will help break the cycle. Draw a diagram of her cycle of fear with exit routes. Be gentle with the scared parts of herself. Enjoy her relationship. Takeaway: Draw out a diagram of what perpetuates your cycle of fear and give yourself exit routes. Sponsor: Air Doctor — is an air filter and air purifier that creates the healthiest environment in your home. It filters out dangerous contaminants and allergens with an ultra HEPA filter that removes 99.99% of tested bacteria and viruses. To get peace of mind, order an Air Doctor today with a 30-day money-back guarantee, go to AirDoctorPro.com, and use promo code "Overit23" and get up to 20% off filters and $350 off on selected models. This Black Friday special also includes a free 3-year warranty on any unit. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

I talk quite a bit on the show about how important it is to release our anger in a healthy way. In today's episode I walk you through how to do one of my favorite and most empowering exercises - an anger burn! If you aren't quite ready for an anger burn, then starting by writing f*** you letters is a great way to process anger. You can listen to the episode I did about that here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/over-it-and-on-with-it/id1050321415?i=1000620283017

This coaching call is about giving ourselves the time to be where we are, even if we don't like it. Today's caller, Maria, has suffered recent losses. It is causing past grief to surface. She asks Christine for guidance on how to tone down her hyper-vigilance and move through the grief she is experiencing. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode427]. Many of us get our idea of what a mother is based on our mother, the media, or other things that are so far off from what a mother actually is. A mother is not a martyr, not someone who sacrifices everything, has no life, or no sense of herself. It is also not abandoning a child, either physically or emotionally, because she's so caught up in her own trauma. A mother is being a loving, nurturing model of what a healthy nervous system looks like, what nurturing looks like, what unconditional love looks like, what acceptance looks like, what boundaries look like, and what soothing looks like. When we are in a phase in life where we are still working out subconscious patterns and wounding, it is impossible to see red flags. If you are beating yourself up for red flags you didn't see in situations, especially partnerships, please forgive yourself. You had to be in those relationships to wake up! Remember, we are naturally attracted to our dysfunction. We are naturally attracted to people who remind us of the parents who didn't give us what we wanted. Please forgive yourself. You can see the red flags now because you have done work. You couldn't see them before. Give yourself a break. Self-beat has no place in healing. Give yourself that mothering or parental nurturing love that you so deserve. Sometimes it is not time to do the "work." The work is nurturing, regulating, and resourcing ourselves. Christine wants to hear from you! She is considering making some changes to the show, and she wants your feedback. Go to ChristineHassler.com/survey to answer a few questions about the podcast, and if you include your name and email, you will be entered into a raffle to win a 30-minute coaching session with Christine. Consider/Ask Yourself: Have you recently gone through loss and grief that have triggered other loss or grief? Are you in a phase of overwhelm by how much you feel you have to process? Did you not have the childhood or the parent you deeply desired? Have you ignored red flags in relationships only now, in hindsight, they are clear as day? Maria's Question: Maria has experienced a lot of loss recently and is looking for guidance on how to move through the grief. Maria's Key Insights and Ahas: She feels emotionally malnourished. Her recent pregnancy and relationship losses are bringing up past grief. She feels unsafe and hyper-vigilant. She feels challenged to express herself or to be joyful. Her mother passed away three years ago. Her mother was emotionally unavailable and detached. She feels overwhelmed, and her sense of self is out of balance. Memories of her childhood feelings are surfacing and mixing with her grief. She wanted intimacy from her mother and her relationships. She longs for connection. She did not have the ability to discern red flags. She is consciously single now. She is a doula who has a deep connection to motherhood. How to Get Over It and On With It: Have compassion and awareness for the season of life she is in now. Know that her soul baby is holding space for her to be ready for a beautiful, healthy relationship. Give herself the love and the nurturing she wanted from her parents. Allow herself to be resourced. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. The new stainless steel cookware set is a must-have. To take advantage of a limited-time offer for listeners of this podcast, go to CarawayHome.com/Overit or use the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Get a discount on a stylish gift for your home or friends and family for the holidays. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Known as The Enlightened Entrepreneur, Elizabeth Canon champions a new approach to entrepreneurship for women—out of the pressure cooker and onto a path that is more sustainable, life-giving and prosperous. Many years ago, Elizabeth became an entrepreneur for freedom, but a few years into running her company realized she felt trapped in the business she had created. On the outside, she was successful, but inside she was lacking a sense of deeper satisfaction. This launched her on a self-directed journey where she invested the equivalent of a Harvard MBA in her own growth and personal discovery. Along the way she learned how to apply what she was finding to her business. Now, as a Master Coach, Elizabeth helps other women step onto their own paths of enlightened entrepreneurship, so they can grow their businesses without sacrificing what matters most in their lives. Because when you do this, you create a level of success, a business—and a life, that is all your own.

This coaching call is about breaking the childhood patterns that show up in relationships. Today's caller, Oliver, struggles to embody his power and set boundaries when he is triggered in relationships. He asks for guidance on how to break and grow beyond survival patterns. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode426]. Many of us can relate to being our current age but in certain situations, we act in a way that is sabotaging, embarrassing, or doesn't get us what we want. Why do we act like this? Because there is often inner child wounding and programming at play. Survival patterns are tricky to change and they can hang on for a long time because a large portion of them are subconscious. Often, we have to duplicate our parental family of origin situation to wake up and transform our survival patterns. It is a necessary part of evolution. It doesn't matter how much awareness we have, we have to walk through a situation to heal it. It is hard work and often thankless work when we are the pattern breakers in our family. If we don't have role models at home, we have to add in new programming. Watching movies, reading books, writing it out, or spending time with others to gain examples of what healthy relationships look like is important. There are things we heal, and then there are some things that take a bit more time. The evolution, the moving out of fear, judgment, beliefs, and pain into love, is ongoing. The next time you feel that you have dealt with something before, or have awareness about something, get more curious about it. The work is never done. We are always learning and growing. Christine wants to hear from you! She is considering making some changes to the show, and she wants your feedback. Go to ChristineHassler.com/survey to answer a few questions about the podcast, and if you include your name and email you will be entered in a raffle to win a 30 min. coaching session with Christine. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you notice you have patterns in relationships that you don't like and want to change? When you were growing up, did you have healthy relationships modeled for you? When you were growing up, did you have healthy parents or a healthy parent that raised you? Are you someone that has done a lot of work and you know a lot of things, but you wish things were changing a little more? Oliver's Question: Oliver struggles with a recurring pattern of sabotaging his relationships. Oliver's Key Insights and Ahas: He is a recently divorced, single parent of two small children. He is aware his pattern came from his mother. His ex triggers his pattern and he freezes when confronted. He gives his power away when confronted. A portion of his development was stunted. His mother was diagnosed as borderline and unpredictable. He has done some inner child work but still has blind spots. He is a therapist. His feelings and emotions have been surfacing since his divorce. He feels he holds power and has clear boundaries in other areas of his life. His father is a public figure in his home country. His mother physically beat the children. He wanted his father to protect him against his mother. It is difficult for him to show anger. He can get stuck in self-analysis. He is a generational pattern breaker. How to Get Over It and On With It: Drop any expectation that this pattern is simple to change. Center himself and reassure his inner child that he has matured and can take care of himself now. Discover and write out what masculinity means to him and what healthy masculinity looks like in a relationship. Get between his inner child and women with tendencies like his mother and separate himself from his inner child. Tap into his protective "papa bear" energy and unleash his anger. Listen to the Coaches Corner: Internal Family Systems podcast with Dr. Richard Schwartz. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. The new stainless steel cookware set is a must-have. To take advantage of a limited-time offer for listeners of this podcast, go to CarawayHome.com/Overit or use the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Get a discount on a stylish gift for your home or friends and family for the holidays. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

We are all leaders, no matter what our job is. And we all have leadership styles that may or may not be the most aligned or effective. Dr. Kirstin Ferguson joins to discuss how we can lead others and ourselves from a place of love. She is a prominent leadership expert and a highly experienced business leader in her own right. Beginning her career as an officer in the Royal Australian Air Force, Kirstin has held roles that have included CEO of an International consulting firm and was appointed acting chair and deputy chair of the Australia Broadcasting Corporation by the Australian Prime Minister. She holds a PhD in Leadership and is an adjunct professor at QUT business school.

This coaching call is about understanding the reason we may be doubting a relationship. Today's caller, Sammie, has doubts about her relationship and is wondering if she should stay in it. Christine guides her to change her perception and look at the situation differently. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode425]. There are many people who would be better off by leaving relationships or situations, but they decide to stay. They only stick around because the devil they know is often better than the devil they don't. They feel there is no risk in staying in the relationship because it is familiar. Then, there are those who probably "should" hang in there a while longer, or stick it out to see what happens, but they run sooner. We need to work on switching those things around so that when we know something is toxic or not for us, we can make a conscious decision to leave. Or, when we are not totally sure, we see some great things about a relationship, but there is also a part of us that wants to run because the intimacy feels scary. But that is the point in a relationship when it could offer us great learning and healing if we could just stick it out. Is your pattern to stick it out too long or to run too soon? If you are sticking it out too long, maybe it is time to go. If you are running too soon, maybe it is time to stay. Be honest with yourself when you are looking for a reason to get out of a relationship. Christine is considering making some changes to the show and she wants your feedback. Go to christinehassler.com/survey to answer questions about the podcast and if you include your name and email you will be entered in a raffle to win a 30 min. coaching session with Christine! Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you in a situation, relationship, or friendship, and you are questioning whether you are in it for the "right" reasons? Are you in a friendship or relationship and think you should end it because you don't want to lead the person on or you don't want to hurt feelings? Do you relate to having an avoidant attachment style? Are you the person in a relationship that when it gets too intimate or too close, you start to pull back? Do you have a deep insecurity about something in your life and think you have to settle because of it? Sammie's Question: Sammie questions if her current relationship is right for her based on her boyfriend's physical disability. Sammie's Key Insights and Ahas: She feels safe in her current relationship and believes it is a healthy one. She questions how her boyfriend's spinal cord injury will impact their future together. She is unsure if the relationship will lead her into a caretaker role. She does not have prior experience to guide her through her uncertainty. She is hopeful about the future of the relationship. She admires the relationship her boyfriend has with his ex. She joined a support group for people in relationships with people who have spinal cord injuries. She is asking legitimate questions. She becomes critical in relationships. She has never had a relationship with this level of stability. She doesn't believe she could have attracted someone so healthy. She has a fearful-avoidant attachment style. She is insecure about where she is in her life. How to Get Over It and On With It: Be 100% honest with her boyfriend. Practice self-acceptance. Lean into the invitation to love and intimacy. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Sarah Jenks is an ordained Priestess in the 13 Moon Mystery School. Sarah thought she was destined to have an "in the box" life after going to a top college, working in advertising, and then creating a successful emotional eating company. One day she walked into her therapist's office where the remnants of a sacred circle from the night before were strewn on the living room floor. She had a full body "Remembering" of being in ceremony. Since that day she's been devoted to her own sacred practice and Temple skills and has devoted her life to creating spaces for women to have their own remembering. Sarah's work is centered around integrating Sacred Feminine wisdom and ceremony into our everyday lives, so that we can create the most rich, sexy, fun and meaningful existence. She offers mentorship programs and sacred council around the body, marriage, motherhood, and work, and runs an incredible monthly membership community where women and non-binary people come together for moonly ceremonies, astrology oracles, and lessons on the nuts and bolts of what it means to have a Sacred Feminine life. Links discussed in this episode: Three day re-birth event: www.christinehassler.com/Sarah Holy Woman: https://sarahjenks.com/holywoman?orid=169926&opid=46 Sacred Start guide Marriage Reset Priestess Presence- https://priestesspresence.com/trainings/?oprid=13245&ref=13531

This coaching call is about reframing a situation to help make a change. Today's caller, Lori, is settling and staying in a situation that isn't what she wants, deserves, or values, out of fear of making a change. Christine offers guidance about how she can raise the bar, work through old patterns, and have the life she deserves. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode424]. Part of breaking a pattern and stepping into worthiness is not perceiving something as uprooting, or upheaval but as raising the bar of what we will tolerate in life. As children, we didn't have the choice to choose for ourselves. So, trauma sits in our nervous system because we were never allowed to feel our feelings in a safe and compassionate way. The trauma is never expressed so it gets locked in and begins to form a pattern. We can't heal something till it's in our face and we can give ourselves the love, compassion, patience, and support that we didn't have as a child. Breaking a pattern isn't just about making a change, it is about how we are with ourselves while we are making the change. The best way to learn and change a pattern is when we are smack dab in the middle of it but with a coach, or someone to help us break the pattern. If you are in a situation where you are settling and you want to make a change and it seems daunting, reframe how you are looking at the situation. If you see the situation as Mt. Everest, it will seem like it is hard to overcome. But, look at the issue as a way to increase your life satisfaction, rather than settling for a life that is based on your patterning. It may be difficult to make the change, but perceptions and beliefs about anything dramatically influence how we experience it. Are you ready to be coached by Christine? If you are, there are three one-on-one coaching opportunities available now. Go to ChristineHassler.com and click on the coaching tab or email [email protected] for more information. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you in a situation that isn't ideal, maybe even unhealthy, but the devil you know is worse than the one you don't? When it comes to relationships, do you have trouble speaking your voice? When it comes to making a change do you generally feel that it's going to be hard and have trouble getting motivated or inspired to make the change? Do you see yourself as a failure and shame yourself because things haven't worked out and you compare yourself to other people who you deem or judge as successful? Lori's Question: Lori recently discovered her partner was sending flirty messages to another woman and is unsure what to do about it. Lori's Key Insights and Ahas: She recently bought a house with her partner of two years. She found flirty text messages on her partner's phone to another woman. Her intuition is sending her messages. She has trouble finding her voice to confront him about the texts. Her partner was defensive and didn't really acknowledge her pain. It drains her to think about dismantling the relationship. She feels like a failure. She compares herself to others. She doesn't want to be in the relationship any longer. She fears uprooting her life. She doesn't feel safe communicating in her relationship. She doesn't have compassion for her inner child when she sees herself as a failure. She has an abandonment wound. How to Get Over It and On With It: Know she doesn't have to do it alone. Speak with a coach or therapist. Be gentle and compassionate with herself while she goes through the process of changing her patterns. Recognize she is healing a deep father wound. Raise the bar on what she is able to accept for herself. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. The new stainless steel cookware set is a must-have. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on your next purchase or by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

My longtime friend and the #1 resource I recommend when it comes to shifting your relationship with money, Kate Northrup, joins me today for an insightful and inspiring conversation about money. As an entrepreneur, bestselling author, and mother, Kate Northrup has built a multimedia digital platform called The Origin Company that reaches hundreds of thousands globally. She's committed to supporting ambitious women to light up the world without burning themselves out. Kate teaches data and soul-driven time and energy management practices that result in saving time, making more money, and experiencing less stress. She's the author of Money: A Love Story and Do Less and the creator of the Do Less Planner System. Kate's work has been featured by Oprah Daily, The Today Show, Yahoo! Finance, Women's Health, Glamour, The NY Times, Harvard Business Review, and more. She lives with her husband and their daughters in Miami. You can access her FREE workshop "Plenty" which will help you Clear Your Money Blocks and Discover True Prosperity While Positively Impacting the World here: Christinehassler.com/relaxedmoney

This coaching call is about old triggers in new situations. Today's caller, Manpreet, is dating someone new and would like guidance on how to keep old triggers out of her new relationship. She has done healing work and is drawing what she wants into her life, but is frustrated when old patterns reemerge. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode423]. When women suffer abuse at the hands of, for this example, men, we can project on all men that they're scary. Women can feel scared to trust men because one man or several men hurt them. So, we want to separate the behavior from the gender, from the person, from the way they look, and know that it was someone else's behavior and not all men behave like that. Because there has to be a disconnection, or disassociation from our sexuality in order for us to survive abuse, we often open up physically or emotionally to people before we are ready as a way to get power over the situation. As adults, we have the gift of being able to ask ourselves what we couldn't do or say when we were little that we can do or say now. We can speak up. We can get out of a situation, we can fight back. We can take our power back. Also, when we share vulnerability too soon we may get hurt and it might not be received in the way that we want because there hasn't been enough rapport, trust, or time there. So in new relationships, or friendships especially intimate relationships, a lot can be triggered. That's why it is so helpful to have a professional or trusted friend to bounce things off of and get some perspective. Then we can come into new relationships with honesty and the knowing that vulnerability comes later. It gives a relationship more of a chance. Consider/Ask Yourself: When something new comes into your life, do you sabotage it because old stuff comes up? Did you grow up not feeling safe, specifically if you are female do you not feel safe around men? Have you done the vulnerability vomit thing too early in a friendship or romantic relationship and it has backfired? Do you feel that you can truly ask for what you need and that you are lovable? Manpreet's Question: Manpreet would like to be more in her goddess energy and learn to be more open to receiving more in relationships. Manpreet's Key Insights and Ahas: Men often show physical interest in her immediately. She has drawn in someone who treats her with respect. She overshares her insecurities with new people quickly. The man she is interested in says he will walk away if she continues to worry about where the relationship is headed. She panics in fear when thinking about whether he will accept her. She finds it easier to use physical manipulation to get what she wants. She attended the Be the Queen program. She feels that masculine, or men have the power and she has no control over situations. She was abused by male family members. She projects her abusive uncle's behavior onto other men. She can speak up for what she wants now. Deep down her fear is about whether she is lovable. She is scared because someone wants to see her for who she really is. She wonders if she is good enough. The healing work she is doing is drawing in things she wants for herself. She wants to have conversations from an empowered place, not a wounded place. She knows her worth isn't tied to anyone but herself. How to Get Over It and On With It: Bring herself into the present moment to separate behaviors from gender. Ask herself what she couldn't say, be, or do when she was a little girl that she can be, say, or do now. Talk with her coach about her feelings and how to process them. Send voicemails or texts to herself, or a trusted friend first to get some perspective. Sponsor: Air Doctor — is an air filter and air purifier that creates the healthiest environment in your home. It filters out dangerous contaminants and allergens with an ultra HEPA filter that removes 99.99% of tested bacteria and viruses. If you want to order an Air Doctor today with a 30-day money-back guarantee, go to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code "Overit" and get up to 39% or $300 off on selected models. My podcast listeners get a free 3-year warranty on any unit. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Shawn Stevenson is the author of the USA Today National bestseller Eat Smarter and the international bestselling book Sleep Smarter. He's also creator of The Model Health Show, featured as the number #1 health podcast in the U.S. with millions of listener downloads each month. A graduate of the University of Missouri–St. Louis, Shawn studied business, biology, and nutritional science and became the cofounder of Advanced Integrative Health Alliance. Shawn has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, The New York Times, Muscle & Fitness, ABC News, ESPN, and many other major media outlets.

This coaching call is about making sense of our intuition. Today's caller, Michaela, wants to drop fully into what she is feeling but is unsure whether her intuition is just a fear-based response to her past. She asks Christine for guidance on how to decipher her feelings and how to trust her intuition. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode422]. We all have the gift of intuition to varying degrees. Some people, who have more gifts, we might refer to as psychics or mediums. But we all have the gift and the ability to connect to our intuition. And often, when we open up our connection to our intuition, it can be confusing. We may get intuitive messages and not know exactly what to do with them. The beautiful thing about surrender or letting go is that it does allow for what actually needs to come forward to happen. Surrendering and receiving can feel scary because we have to be still. When we're not in motion, either mentally or physically, and stillness comes, it often can trigger a fear response. Because if you grew up with any kind of abuse or chaos you know that when things got quiet, or still it wasn't always a good sign; the calm before the storm. So, we keep ourselves moving to both avoid chaos and to avoid the feelings. Many of us have wounds and trauma that we've been carrying around for decades and if we keep ourselves busy and distracted enough then we don't have to feel the pain. If we do surrender and allow ourselves to receive, then there's an invitation to feel. And, often it isn't the party we want to attend. The beautiful thing about inner child work is that we have all these beautiful parts of us that come alive again and they become a great source of love. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you feel like your intuition is telling you something and you're not exactly sure what it means or what to do with it? Have you had a life of lots of doing and you feel this huge desire to just be, but at the same time it terrifies you? Are you someone that is good at receiving or are you better at giving? Are you willing to carve the time out for yourself and change behaviors to connect more deeply with your inner child so that you can feel safe in your body? Michaela's Question: Michaela is being pulled to listen to her intuition but is confused about whether the message is coming from her intuition or is a fear-based response. Michaela's Key Insights and Ahas: She is an imposter syndrome and transformational coach. She left the corporate world after 25 years. She is feeling pulled to stop doing and to listen to her intuition. She is strongly spiritual. She has a global network of people as clients. She invests money in personal development work. She suffered from imposter syndrome in the past. Her family pretended everything was okay, no matter what was happening. She feels coaching is her calling. She's been married for 25 years. She has a hidden life and doesn't feel safe. She had traumatic experiences in her childhood. She sometimes wants to disappear. She recently uncoupled from an intimate connection. She is searching for parental safety. She wants to feel supported and loved. She finds it difficult to receive. She doesn't understand how people love her. How to Get Over It and On With It: Delve deeply into healing inner child work. Let go of her distractions to integrate the fragmented pieces of herself. Trust her intuition and be curious about the messages. Be curious and allow people's love for her to model how to love her inner child. Take action in response to her internal messaging rather than taking action to avoid her feelings. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on your next purchase or by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Kimberlee's book and podcast, THE FISCAL FEMINIST, is a financial wake-up call for women in which she shares her personal and professional expertise to help women improve their financial health, money-proof their relationships and learn how to be intentional and strategic with their finances and careers. Kimberlee has more than 25 years of finance, legal and corporate experience. She is currently a managing director and partner at the private wealth management firm The Bahnsen Group and a certified divorce financial analyst. But Kimberlee hasn't always been so confident with money. After a long and contentious divorce that completely upended her life, Kimberlee found herself in the trenches where many of her clients and listeners currently are today. She wasn't prepared financially and was afraid for her and her children's future. Her mission is to ensure no other woman has to feel afraid like she did. While many women feel overwhelmed today in a post-pandemic world, juggling careers, motherhood and a looming recession, Kimberlee believes every woman can improve her financial health no matter her age, economic or marital status.

This coaching call is about overcoming the fear of stepping out of our comfort zones. Today's caller, Alana, has always played it safe by never stepping out of her comfort zone. She asks Christine for guidance about how to overcome the fear of taking the risks necessary to move into the life she wants. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode421]. It can be scary to move out of what is familiar. Our risk tolerance in our early 20s is much different than when we are older. When we have lived a little more life, we have seen enough to know that regret is far worse than risk. We can't get time back and regret is very painful to live with. We can recover from most risks, especially social media posts, going after clients, and putting ourselves "out there." Some people may judge, or some people may not like it but we can recover from that. To be coming to the end of life and wondering why we didn't go after what we wanted is far more painful than taking a risk and maybe having a few people say something not so nice. We're not living our lives if we're only doing things that we think will not be judged by other people. When we move into a different career, especially the personal growth industry, there may be people who judge us. Let them. It's okay. When we start looking at our own stuff, start speaking our truth, and start healing generational trauma, a lot of people judge us because their subconscious doesn't want to look at their stuff. Instead of them taking personal responsibility and dealing with their stuff they choose to judge others. It is their defense strategy. The biggest thing to remember is not to take it personally. Allow your inner voice and the voices of the people who love and support you to be the voices you pay attention to. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you a coach who wants to start a coaching practice but you're playing it safe despite your training, skills, and passion? Have you had challenges in life that reinforce your desire to stay in your safety zone? Are you willing to start making some bigger changes and start taking some risks? Do you deal with imposter syndrome and would you like to let it go for good? Alana's Question: Alana fears uncharted territory and would like guidance on how to transition from a structured career path into a less structured entrepreneurial coaching business. Alana's Key Insights and Ahas: She has worked in a structured career. She is a certified life coach. She finds it difficult to put herself out there. She suffers from imposter syndrome. She fears asking for payment for her services. She believes she can get clients. She fears she will change as a person. Her mother passed away unexpectedly. She lost a pregnancy. She is comfortable with playing it safe. She is hesitant to move forward into unfamiliar territory. She has relied on external validation. She wants to move into curiosity. She is committed to reaching out to clients. How to Get Over It and On With It: Shift the way she looks at safety. Reassure herself that safety is internally resourced. Honor her inner voice. Remind herself that just because something is unfamiliar doesn't mean it is unsafe. Takeaway: Stop letting the fear of what other people think stop you from going after what you want. Push out of what is safe. If you only live in what is safe, you will never really live. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

This is a conversation I loved having because it is SO relevant for me right now as a new mom. We cover mom guilt, parenting shaming, attachment theory, forgiving ourselves orver what what we "should have done" and SO much more. My guest, Ellen Boeder, MA, LPC has been a licensed psychotherapist since 2003. After getting married and becoming a mother to two children (now 12 and 14 years old), Ellen began to focus primarily on couples in her private psychotherapy and coaching practice. Ellen is now a certified practitioner of PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy)., Ellen enjoys teaching and consulting on relationship topics, writing her blog on motherhood and relationships, is fascinated by nature, spirituality, human development, and studies a range of topics from yoga and meditation to evolutionary sociobiology. Ellen is also on faculty for the Relationship School—a business founded by her husband, Jayson Gaddis, that provides in depth relationship education and coaching training. www.ellenboeder.com

This coaching call is about being in a similar pattern when it comes to dating and relationships. Today's caller, Trish, longs for a committed relationship but doesn't understand why she has a pattern of choosing emotionally unavailable people. She asks for guidance on how to choose the right person. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode420]. So many of our relationship challenges come from our parental issues from our childhood. Not all of them, but a lot of them. As children, we want to be loved, feel safe, and validated by our parents. When we have a parent whom we don't get everything we want, or need from, we settle for the best they can do, even though it's not fully what we want. We often end up not being empowered in relationships. Because there's still that little inner child part of us who believes that we should just take what we can get. But, every soul seeks to evolve. Evolution is moving away from judgment, away from limiting beliefs, and into love. The only way we can move away from judgment and limiting beliefs is to have them right in our face so that they're painful enough for us to look at. Isn't life wonderful the way it works? So often the relationships we draw in are triggers and activators to look at the stuff from our childhood that we haven't fully healed. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you someone who maybe has been married or has been in many relationships and you find yourself with the same outcome? Did you grow up feeling like you wanted more from both or one of your parents and you never really got everything you wanted? Are you grieving a recent breakup and blaming yourself or wondering what you did wrong? Are you constantly working on yourself to try to attract a better relationship? Trish's Question: Trish is frustrated that she chooses men who are emotionally unavailable or incapable of choosing or loving her. Trish's Key Insights and Ahas: She's done personal development work. Her parents divorced when she was one year old. She didn't feel her father's love. She didn't spend time with her father. She knows she has a lot to offer a partner. The men she chooses don't recognize her value. She can be guarded in relationships. She longs for a committed relationship. She doesn't date a lot. She doesn't want to be alone. She doesn't show up empowered in the early stages of intimate relationships. She doesn't want to get hurt. She ignores red or yellow flags early in relationships. In her last relationship, she believed their core values were aligned. She knows it is not her job to be a man's savior. How to Get Over It and On With It: Drop the belief that she has a bad picker. Have clear conversations about what she wants early in a relationship. Empower herself by not being a victim of her circumstances. Give herself the time and space to heal. Takeaway: What choices and what states of being can you embody to step into empowerment? Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on your next purchase or by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

This coaching call is about the motherhood transition and finding your identity. Today's caller, Julia, has children leaving the nest. She is unsure what comes next for her. She asks Christine for guidance about what she can do to discover who she is. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode419]. The earlier in life we have children the less time we have to work on our own inner child. Part of why we hang on to moments with our kids is because our inner child may not have had it. The more we have a connection to our own inner child and our sense of play and magic the less we need children around us to give us that. So much of what mothers miss from children is the sense of unconditional love and joy. One of the things our culture is not great with is grief and letting it be okay that we are grieving. And, when we don't complete a cycle with ritual and intention it still lingers. A part of us is always in the past. We always have nostalgia and it makes it harder to step into our next phase. Often, we try to redo our childhood through parenthood. We're trying to give our children the life that we didn't have and it is beautiful that we want to do better. But what can happen is we become so involved in our child's life and become so immersed in parenthood, particularly motherhood, that we neglect our own inner child. It's a delicate balance to mother others while mothering ourselves. Remember not to neglect your inner child by putting everything you have into your children. It is important we parent our inner child as well. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you at an age in life where you are trying to get excited about the next chapter but are having a hard time doing it? Are you going through any kind of transition and you find it bittersweet? Have you questioned your identity, not just from moving from motherhood to being an empty-nester? Have you avoided dealing with your childhood by being a great parent or having a great life as an adult and you know it's time to deal with your childhood? Julia's Question: Julia feels she is in a phase in life where she doesn't know what comes next for her. She asks for guidance about how to rediscover herself. Julia's Key Insights and Ahas: She just sent her oldest off to college. She has one child still at home. She doesn't want this motherhood phase to be over. She worked and traveled before she had children. She may not know herself as an adult woman. She feels that possibly her best years have passed. She is considering joining the Signature Retreat. She wishes more people spoke about this motherhood transition. She teaches Pilates. She feels like she needs to get busy doing something. She is grieving her childhood. Her childhood was chaotic. How to Get Over It and On With It: Recognize the things about motherhood that she won't miss. Find ways to enjoy today. Join the Signature Retreat. Take the opportunity to relax into her feminine energy. Consider who she wants to be and what she wants to leave behind. Take the space to nurture and heal her inner child. Sponsor: Aquatru — purifies water using a four-stage reverse osmosis process. The countertop purifiers remove 15 times more contaminants than ordinary pitcher filters plus the water tastes fantastic. Their long-lasting and affordable filters are independently tested and certified to NSF standards to remove over 80% of the most harmful contaminants. Go to Aquatru.com and enter OVERIT at checkout to get 20% off any water purifier. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

For the past 20 years, Lindsey Meehleis has worked in healthcare but found herself often in the shadows. In the shadows of the night helping women discover their own strength through psychedelic, transcendent experiences while they birth their babies in power at home. As well in the shadows of death as a Midwife who helps people cross the rainbow bridge. Her hands have touched the lives of many as they take their first and last breath. She has woven the stories of thousands of births throughout these 20 years. Trained traditionally and licensed through the Medical Board, she quickly learned that what is needed in the magic and mystery of birth and death can't be found in a book. She serves families from womb to tomb, like many medicine women have done throughout time, with a deep remembering that many of these witches were burned at the stake for their threat to the standard industrialized medical complex. She has witnessed a drastic shift in healthcare since 2020 and looks forward to co- creating a new future of what true medicine always was. She gets down to the nitty-gritty of LIFE and everything it brings and illustrates the power that we have within, showing that birth, life and death are pivotal rites of passage that deserve to be held in sacred deep reverence.

The essence of this coaching call is about healing a relationship with adult children. Today's caller, Gail, is dealing with estrangement by her children since her marriage to their father broke up and her ex-husband passed away. She asks for guidance on how to find joy during a new chapter in her life and how she can reconnect with her children. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode418]. If you walk on eggshells, tiptoe around, or try to protect everyone else's feelings, ask yourself if that is the most loving thing to do. Sometimes love can be messy and truth can be messy but walking on eggshells, pretending, and being a chameleon is not love. Children need to know that their parents will fight for them and risk them being mad or pushing them away to have a relationship with them. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you have any children that you're estranged from or that you have a rocky relationship with and would like to repair it? "Should" you be excited about things in your life but you're having a hard time accessing joy? Do you ever feel like you want to tell the truth about something but you can't because you're protecting someone else? Gail's Question: Gail asks for guidance in getting back to joy while suffering from grief. Gail's Key Insights and Ahas: Her husband died after three months of them separating. It's been five years since her husband's death. She believes her adult children are suffering. She feels numb. She completed the Over It and On With It online course. She is engaged to be married. She is slowly rebuilding her relationship with her four children. She fears her new relationship could jeopardize her relationship with her children. She wants to respect her children's wants but it feels unjust to her. There is a religious component to the family disruption. She takes intentional steps to rekindle her family relationship. She has an internal dilemma about being a mother and a woman. She doesn't trust her intuition. How to Get Over It and On With It: Write each of her children a letter sharing her feelings. Become the leader of her family and tell her children the truth. Get guidance from a family therapist. She deserves joy and happiness. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on your next purchase or by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Ryan Mayer, certified ADDCA and ICF coach, is on a mission to empower others with ADHD toward their greatness. He has coached clients from 19 different countries and has nearly half a million followers on social media. His Performance and Mindset Coaching helps others navigate through the storms in their lives caused by ADHD, making measurable progress on their most important goals. Having ADHD himself, Ryan calls on personal experience to equip his clients - who may feel like they are constantly falling short at work and at home - with the strategies to step into the happier life that they deserve. Ryan is happily married to his (amazing neurotypical) wife Andrea. They have three adorable children and live in Cleveland, OH (USA). To get Ryan's 10 day course that is all text message based for 30% off go to https://market.authoritive.com/workthatworksforyouradhdand use "OnWithIt30" at checkout

The essence of this coaching call is about our protective patterns manifesting as nervous habits. Today's caller, Jessica, picks her skin. She would like guidance about understanding her nervous habit and how to stop it. Christine sheds some light on why these kinds of habits exist and why wanting to get rid of them or making them wrong is exactly what not to do. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode417]. The origin of our nervous habits is a tender, scared, powerless part of us. When pain is inflicted upon us, either emotional, physical, sexual, or mental pain, and everything feels out of control, our ability to cause ourselves pain and being the one controlling the pain gives us a sense of power. When we are in overwhelm of any kind, we can use our nervous habit as a soothing strategy. It sort of shuts down everything else and brings our focus to the habit so we don't have to feel other things. We use it as a sense of control, as well as a soothing strategy. It is a useful strategy our subconscious creates to help us manage our pain. Remember, our inner protector is protecting a very scared child who felt powerless and had pain inflicted on them. When we feel the urge to apply our protective strategies, AKA act out our nervous habits, the last thing we want to do is try to force them to go away because they will just try to do their job even stronger. We need to make a conscious effort to be aware of our habits and not judge or shame ourselves for them. My upcoming Signature Retreat is almost upon us. To get a unique sneak peek of what to expect during the retreat, I am having a Grad Panel on September 6th. To attend or for a recording of the panel go to Christine.Hassler.com/panel or [email protected]. For a nurturing self-care experience, join like-minded women from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. And, to apply for a partial scholarship go to ChristineHassler.com/scholarship. The course is almost full. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you have any nervous habits like skin-picking, nail-biting, pulling apart split ends, etc.? Did you have pain inflicted upon you as a child and you felt you had no control? Do you notice nervous habits emerge even in situations where you should feel safe? Do you try to stop a habit by shaming yourself or making it wrong and you aren't getting anywhere? Jessica's Question: Jessica asks for guidance on how to break her nervous habit of skin-picking. Jessica's Key Insights and Ahas: Her skin picking interferes with her being fully present. She feels anxious when she picks her skin. She is a high achiever. She finds it difficult to break her habit. Her habit soothes her. Pain was inflicted upon her which left her feeling powerless. She is in the early stages of pregnancy. She wished she had an emotionally present, nurturing mother. Her grandfather caused her distress as a child. She feels she has to put everyone else first. How to Get Over It and On With It: Let go of the shame and judgment she has about her nervous habit. Have compassion for herself. Sign up for the Inner Child Workshop. Get herself into the present moment as much as possible. If she has the urge to pick, go ahead and pick but do it consciously. Take care not to go into the martyr-mother role. Takeaways: If you have a nervous habit let go of your shame and judgment around it. Be patient and gentle with yourself and nourish your inner child. Sponsor: Air Doctor — is an air filter and air purifier that creates the healthiest environment in your home. It filters out dangerous contaminants and allergens with an ultra HEPA filter that removes 99.99% of tested bacteria and viruses. If you want to order an Air Doctor today with a 30-day money-back guarantee, go to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code "Overit" and get up to 39% or $300 off on selected models. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

If you want a simple, effective way to increase the quality of your life don't miss this episode. I've upgraded my 40 day stop-start-modify plan to support you in implementing new habits to create more calm, health, joy and prosperity in your life.

The essence of this coaching call is what causes inspirational blocks and the unhealthy ways we try to motivate ourselves. Today's caller, Jo, is asking for guidance about how to tap into her inspiration. The pandemic impacted her nervous system and left her lacking the motivation to live into her purpose. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode416]. Often, what inspires us is the stuff that makes us mad. It doesn't mean we need to come out with anger at people. We need to move through the anger to find the fire and the passion that lies underneath. Then, we can step into the feminine power of discernment and discover our Warrior Woman. Which is a beautiful place to be. When we do this we allow ourselves to be pulled forward by a calling and a mission, versus looking for something external to motivate us. Women, in general, are not great with our anger. It leaks out in certain ways but we are not great at tapping into our rage and anger and letting it out in a healthy way. This blocks us from our passion. And if we keep suppressing our emotions, rage, and anger we will feel depressed. Plus, we tend to motivate ourselves by being hard on ourselves and looking at what we think is wrong and the changes we need to make. We believe if we make ourselves miserable enough then maybe we will be motivated to make a change. That is a strategy that doesn't work or only works for the short term. It allows our inner critic to run the show and we burn ourselves out. When we realize we are not doing anything wrong and that we are living our purpose because we are learning, growing, healing, and raising our consciousness, it releases the feeling of failure. If you resonate with this podcast and Christine's style of coaching, Elementum Coaching Institute is the coaching certification program for you. Even if you are not a coach, and want a personal transformation program to give you coaching skills you can use with your employees or peers, in relationships, or with children, you are encouraged to apply at ElementumCoachingInstitute.com. Enrollment closes September 1, 2023, and the course begins September 14th. This is the final course for 2023‒2024. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you feeling a lack of inspiration? Do you feel you had a setback during the pandemic and you haven't been able to come back from it? Do you want to feel like you're making an impact, that you matter, and what you're doing in the world matters? Are you someone who benefits from connection with other people? Are you an extrovert who isn't connecting with people enough? Jo's Question: Jo is asking about how to find inspiration and motivation for herself and her business in the here and now. Jo's Key Insights and Ahas: She gave up her teaching job to write a novel and build a coaching business. She moved in with her parents. The pandemic impacted her nervous system. She has difficulty spending a lot of time by herself. She wants to do something meaningful. She gets overwhelmed with business tasks. She is trying to motivate herself by being hard on herself. She wants to be inspired by life. She has finished her novel. She signed a lease on an office. She is an extrovert. She lived with depression for a long time. She longs for freedom, transparency, and truth. She sees her anger as a negative. She started her business after she found self-compassion. She is joining Elementum Coaching. How to Get Over It and On With It: When she feels trapped in the moment, consider what choices are available to her. Put herself out there to get connection and support. Tap into the fire beneath her anger and be motivated by her deep desire. Start using her voice again. Join the upcoming Signature Retreat, read Expectation Hangover, or visit ChristineHassler.com/angerrelease. Takeaways: Consider — Is there a part of you that wants to be free and believes that if you do what you want bad things will happen? Get to know your anger, feel it, and understand it. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Elisha Tichelle is an alchemist of the nervous system for visionary leaders and heart-centered entrepreneurs. Following a 20-year career as a somatic researcher and professor, Elisha now supports her clients to expand their nervous systems so their work can make a greater impact in the world - without burning out. Elisha's facilitation guides an expansion of nervous system regulation, moving people out of operating from positions of stress and overwhelm into embodied states of flow, connection, and mastery. Elisha is the 'behind the scenes' priestess to some of the world's most successful and well-known coaches. Through her training program 'Evolution,' she guides space holders, facilitators, and coaches into integrating nervous system work in their business and life.

This coaching call is about the difference between masculine energy and hypervigilance. Today's caller, Jo, has been caring for her husband after a debilitating accident. She believes she is functioning only in her masculine energy and would like some balance, but her actions may be coming from a response to trauma she hasn't fully processed. Christine offers guidance. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode415]. There is an unconscious, and sometimes conscious, expectation that masculine energy is supposed to be strong and be able to hold us. But, what masculine energy truly is, is taking initiative, moving in a linear way, being present, and holding for things. It is making quick decisions about things and being productive in certain ways. Healthy masculine energy is NOT about being so busy and doing everything for everyone that we are depleted completely — That's being hyper-vigilant. Hypervigilance is a response to trauma that makes us feel out of control. Because no one chooses trauma. It is completely out of our control. When we are hypervigilant, we are looking for a way to feel in control again. We think if we do and control everything, we can prevent expectation hangovers or more trauma. If you're trying to shift more into your feminine energy when you're in hypervigilance, good luck because in order for you to shift into your feminine energy, you have to feel safe and if you are in hypervigilance, you do not feel safe. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who are ready to let go of their limiting beliefs. For a nurturing self-care experience, join like-minded women from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply for a partial scholarship go to ChristineHassler.com/scholarship. Consider/Ask Yourself: Has there been a drastic change in your life you haven't had time to process because you have had to go right into action? Do you often think you're in your masculine when you are truly in hypervigilance? Are you someone that is so used to doing, you often don't even know how to be? When it comes to surrender and accepting things, how are you with it? Can you let go or do you like to fight with reality? Jo's Question: Jo is asking for guidance on how to prolong being in her feminine energy and relinquish her feelings of needing to be in control. Jo's Key Insights and Ahas: Her husband was in a debilitating accident. She feels she shifted into her masculine after her husband's accident. She likes being in her feminine but feels pulled out of it too often. She wants to relieve her husband's pain. She does inner child work and meditation. She has a tendency to be a people pleaser. She has been a control freak in the past but wants to let go of it. She hasn't done trauma-release work. Her father was strict and unpredictable. She does everything for others. She questions her self-worth. She wants to cure her husband's pain. Her husband has accepted his physical condition. She is grieving and hasn't fully processed the incident. How to Get Over It and On With It: Realize she is being hypervigilant, not in her masculine. Find a somatic and trauma-release-work therapist. Have compassion for herself. Release her anger and trauma. Recalibrate her nervous system. Have conversations with her husband about creating polarity in their relationship. Accept where her husband is in his healing process. Takeaways: Are you in your masculine energy or being hypervigilant? Sponsor: Milkify.me — is a concierge breast milk freeze-drying service for mothers who are breastfeeding or planning to breastfeed that transforms frozen milk into convenient pouches of powder that last for 3 years. To get $40 off your first order message @Milkify.me on Instagram or at Milkify.me and mention the code Christine. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

In your personal development journey, you may be asking "what's the point?" You are doing all this "work" and you are not seeing the changes in your life that you desire. In this CC I answer this question and give you reassurance to keep going.

This coaching call is about how patience and compassion without clarity can lead to resentment. Today's caller, Lucy, doesn't feel like a priority in her partner's life. She asks for guidance on whether the relationship is right for her or if there are too many red flags. Christine shares some skills that can help Lucy get what she wants from her relationship. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode414]. Consciousness isn't just about talking about our wounding or holding space for someone when they cry. It's about taking action that's in integrity and alignment with who we say we are. When we have a lot of emotional vulnerability or sexual intimacy and vulnerability with a man, we can mistake it for being in a conscious relationship. If you are in a dynamic where you're having a lot of emotional intimacy, but you don't have the consistency or the feeling of safety, it's not as conscious as you may think. What do you need to do to make a relationship more conscious? Bring accountability, responsibility, and agreements into it. Consciousness is an aspect of sacred union, and in sacred union, there's a masculine and feminine. There is the being and the doing. We can't just swim around in the feminine being of vulnerability, processing, and emotional intimacy without the masculine of doing, showing up, and having structure. We need both, otherwise, our inner child doesn't feel safe. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who are ready to let go of their limiting beliefs. For a nurturing self-care experience, join like-minded women from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply for a partial scholarship go to ChristineHassler.com/scholarship. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you in a relationship, whether it will be romantic or otherwise, that you're doubting or you don't have clarity about? Are you someone who has trouble asking for what you need so you ask for it in a vague, safe way? Do you not feel like a priority in a relationship, or as a child? Are you doubting yourself? Are you feeling some nudges and doubts about something but you're doubting your doubts? Lucy's Question: Lucy feels stuck when trying to discern the difference between what is a red flag and what is her intuition in a new relationship. Lucy's Key Insights and Ahas: She feels that this new relationship is her first adult relationship. She has a hard time trusting herself. Her mother didn't trust her. She and her partner are in the process of defining their relationship. She wants to know if the relationship is right for her. She doesn't feel like a priority to her partner. She appreciates certainty and consistency. Her partner has full custody of his two children. Her partner doesn't make plans with her but asks for dates with little notice. As a child, she longed for her mother's attention. She is still learning about herself and her patterns in relationship. How to Get Over It and On With It: Propose a schedule to her partner and re-negotiate if needed. Get specific about what she needs from the relationship. Takeaways: Where do you need to have more masculine energy in your relationships? Where do you need to make clear agreements so you can feel safe? Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Philippa Murphy is an Infant Gut Health and Postnatal Practitioner, a Lactation Consultant, Certified Nutritional Health Coach, and an accepted trainer of Health Visitors and Feeding Specialists in the UK. As a five-time Author, with her bestselling book BabyCues Prevent and Remedy Colic, Reflux,Lactose and Dairy Overload Naturally, Philippa is also the Founder of the revolutionary BabyCues Postnatal Evolution, which encompasses Four Global Health Campaigns that are remarkably evolving postnatal education and preventative intervention. These campaigns all come from the child's perspective with the two main pathways focusing on "cue-led communication and response," and "digestive understanding and balance." Get 15% off all Philippa's books and masterclasses at christinehassler.com/baby and use promo code ChristineAndBabyCues

This coaching call is about surrender and keeping hope. Today's caller, Eva, is ready to give up hope and accept that she may never get pregnant. But her intuition is telling her that one day she will be a mother. She asks Christine for guidance and clarity about how to shift into acceptance and let go of her desire to have a baby. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode413]. Our drive and yearning to have a child can be due to our wanting to make our own childhood different. It is a reason why the desire to have a child can be so strong. There is an attachment to wanting to have a biological child that causes a degree of stress inside our system and it can make it harder for the body to get pregnant. The body will relax when we surrender. But how do we surrender but not give up hope? Resignation is giving up and feeling that you don't care about what happens. Surrender is more of a letting-go energy. Just handing it over to a higher power, handing it over to a source, handing it over to God, and keeping that longing and desire in your heart. Oftentimes, our "soul babies" want a certain kind of clearing of generational patterns before they come in. And, our bodies strive to be healthy before they carry a baby. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who are ready to let go of their limiting beliefs. For a nurturing self-care experience join like-minded women from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply for a partial scholarship go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat. Consider/Ask Yourself: Have you been wanting something for a long time and you keep trying but it's not happening? Have you decided to surrender, but still have some hope and it leads to an expectation hangover? Were you able to fully relax and surrender as a child? As a coping strategy, are you a planner? Does controlling and planning everything help you to feel safe? Eva's Question: Eva has been trying to have a child and has not yet gotten pregnant. Her intuition tells her she will one day have a child. She is looking for guidance about how to reduce her monthly expectation hangovers. Eva's Key Insights and Ahas: She used fertility drugs to try to get pregnant. She grieved the idea of being childless. Her gut tells her that one day she will become pregnant and be a mother. She doesn't want to have an expectation hangover every month when she menstruates. Her planning and control is a trauma response. She believes she needs to mother herself better. Her mother was emotionally volatile. Her mood as a child was based on the mood of her mother. Her nervous system is dysregulated. Her inner child wants to be held. How to Get Over It and On With It: Surrender and let go of the attachment to having a biological child but stay open to the idea. Rediscover her true essence. Know that it is not her fault for not getting pregnant. Give herself the childhood, and love she deserves, but never had. Begin the Inner Child Workshop. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a naturally slick ceramic surface. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on your next purchase by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Ladies, do you lean more toward being a bitch or a doormat? I know that's not a very nice question to ask, but it's an important one! We all have the capacity to have bitchy moments when we are impatient, snappy, cold or just a bit rude. And we all have the capacity to have moments where we people please or let someone else walk over our boundaries. In this episode I talk about why we act this way and what we can do to change it. Also, here is a link to the article I reference in the show: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/doormat-diva-alpha-female-bitch-from-hell-which-one-jodie-salt

This coaching call is about embracing our mother energy. Today's caller, Davina, is a life coach struggling to attract her ideal clients. She was told that she may fear being seen, but it didn't entirely resonate with her. During the session, she discovers that it is an inner-child wound impacting her efforts. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode412]. When we have blocks, when imposter syndrome comes up, or we are not attracting what we want, we can believe it is a fear of being seen. And while that may be true in many ways — many of us do have a fear of being seen and being vulnerable, but that is not always what it is. There may be something deeper that is more accurate. There are inner-child, super-subconscious wounds and operating systems we develop when we are young impact our lives in various ways that we are not aware of. Whenever our reaction to something doesn't match the circumstance in terms of severity, our inner child is triggered. For anyone, especially coaches, sometimes we think we need to have great answers all the time, but if we can just hold a space of love and compassion for people in our life, that is often more powerful than any piece of advice or aha moment we can create. Often, someone feeling not-judged is the biggest aha moment they can possibly have. At Elementum Coaching Institute, we train epic coaches. If you resonate with this podcast and Christine's style of coaching, this is the coaching certification program for you. Even if you are not a coach, and want a personal transformation program to give you coaching skills you can use with your employees or peers, in relationships, or with children you are encouraged to apply at ElementumCoachingInstitute.com. Enrollment closes September 1, 2023, and the course begins September 14th. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you believe you have a fear of being seen or is it hard to put yourself out there? Are you a coach and you are having difficulty attracting the exact kind of clients you want? Do you have a childhood that involves some kind of abandonment or not a feeling really chosen by a parent? Do you get angry, frustrated, or annoyed when people copy you? Davina's Question: Davina is struggling to attract her ideal clients and is asking for guidance about her messaging efforts. Davina's Key Insights and Ahas: She is a life coach. She is annoyed by people who copy her. A coach told her she is afraid of being seen. Her mother abandoned her and started a different family. She had to share her mother's attention. She felt she has always had to do things on her own. She feels sad and angry. She grieves the loss of the relationship she had with her mother. Being vulnerable is uncomfortable for her. Her father wasn't emotionally available. She is vulnerable when she feels safe and supported. She takes a long time to open up to people. How to Get Over It and On With It: Know that her anger and sadness are valid and that it needs to be expressed. Work with her inner child about her mother's leaving. Take the opportunity to be open and honest. Give herself as much time as she needs. Write down how she would coach others in a similar situation. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

This coaching call is about honoring yourself and another person by completing an unhealthy dynamic. Jade & Matthew both join this couple's session to ask Christine for guidance about where to go in their current relationship. If you are going through a relationship breakup or if it is time to end a relationship, this episode is valuable especially if there is wounding playing out in your relationship. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode411]. One of the ways that we suffer most in relationship is thinking that our love will change someone. But, the opportunity to truly heal and step into their greatest potential is up to that person. Oftentimes, coming together in relationship does help someone step into their fullest potential, but there's a caveat: they have to do it. They have to want it and it has to happen quickly. If you're in a relationship where it has been years of the other person going back to their old patterns, then you are in the cycle of them apologizing and feeling awful and you taking them back thinking things will be different. They are going to do their work and then something else happens but you see their little boy or little girl, and you love them, and this time was different and they're really doing the work, and they're seeing the counselor, but then they do it again. It's just a loop. I encourage you to choose you, to love you. They need to do their healing on their own. Making the choice to end, or complete, an unhealthy dynamic to heal individually is a gift we give to the other person. When we trust love and truth it always gets us to where we want to go. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you an enabler or are you addicted to someone else enabling you? Do you tend to be a little codependent or a lot codependent in relationships? Do you know that you love someone so much but no matter how much you love them it's up to them to change? Are you feeling that it is time for a conscious uncoupling in your relationship? Jade & Matthew's Question: Jade & Matthew ask for guidance about how best to heal themselves. Jade & Matthew's Key Insights and Ahas: Matthew feels relieved. They separated after he returned from his travels. Matthew shared his shadows with Jade. Matthew became aware that he seeks validation from other women. Matthew will do inner child work via therapy. Jade believes it is best for them to not have contact while they are healing. Jade needs to see Matthew needs to love himself. Matthew wants Jade to be in his life because he feels a soul-level connection to her. How to Get Over It and On With It: Have no contact with each other for one year so they can heal themselves. Use the sentence starters Christine gave them to journal about their feelings. Jade needs time alone and for Matthew to respect that. Take the opportunity to learn what healthy, mature love is. Sponsor: Sensate — is an infrared resonance, calming device that when synchronized with sessions in the companion app works towards reducing stress, and improving well-being. It provides deep relaxation in 10‒30 minute sessions to tone the vagus nerve. For $30 off your purchase, go to GetSensate.com and use the promo code OVERIT. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

I'm answering another question from a listener this week! She asked me to expand upon a phrase I've used in the show: leaky sexual energy. In this episode I'll describe what leaky sexual energy is, where it comes from, how to recognize it, how it impacts

This coaching call is about when our childhood wounding is triggered by a child. Lorena feels she has a parenting blind spot when it comes to her relationship with one of her stepchildren. She would like guidance on how to be a better stepmom and how to respond rather than react when she is triggered. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode410] There are different blessings that go along with being a stepparent. But, in general, parenting can be hard. You can love a child so much but still get frustrated and triggered and then feel guilty about it. Understanding that we are human and we get triggered goes a long way. Parenting is a spiritual practice. For these little beings that choose us, either as parents or step-parents, we have a soul contract. And, relationships and parenting are some of the biggest ways we evolve as humans. With that said, we tend to reject people and behavior that reminds us of our wounded parts. We can have an ick factor towards it or them because we carry internal judgment and have self-protection mechanisms in place. It is much easier to love someone who doesn't share the same wounding. When we are triggered, pausing and taking the time to regulate our nervous system allows us to be in the moment and respond to children, not from the viewpoint of our inner child, but as the adults we've become. Consider/Ask Yourself: Did you ever feel rejected or neglected as a child? Did you want more nurturing and love? Do you have a child or a stepchild that you just don't connect to and it bothers you, and you feel guilty because you don't like being around that child as much as you do your other children? Are you committed to being a better parent both to yourself and your inner child and your child or children? Lorena's Question: Lorena feels she has a blind spot in her relationship with her stepchild and is asking for guidance about building a better relationship. Lorena's Key Insights and Ahas: She has been a stepmother since 2016. Her stepchild struggles with emotional regulation. She has a baby and two stepchildren. There may not have been an original mother/child bond in her stepchild's life. She doesn't want to be around her stepchild. She feels invaded and resents the extra effort it takes to nurture her stepchild. Her father was an alcoholic and made inappropriate requests of her. Her stepchildren are there 50% of the time. Her husband looks to her to be a mature stepparent. She beats herself up for her feelings toward her stepchild. She didn't get loving attention from her mother. How to Get Over It and On With It: Tell her inner child that her father's care wasn't her responsibility. Accept that her stepchild is a trigger for her. Try seeing herself in her stepchild. Pause, take a deep breath, and say — I love you, and I got you — when triggered to regulate her nervous system. Do not underestimate what a nine-year-old can talk about. Get in alignment with her husband about her stepparenting. Sponsor: Sensate — is an infrared resonance device that when synchronized with sessions in the companion app works towards reducing stress, and improving well-being. It provides deep relaxation in 10‒30 minute sessions to tone the vagus nerve. For $30 off your purchase, go to GetSensate.com and use the promo code OVERIT. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Let's talk about sex and shame and desire and pleasure! Emily Morse joins me to dive into why our sex life is so important and how to up our Sex IQ. Emily is the host of Sex with Emily, the #1 podcast on sex and relationships. She received a Doctorate in Human Sexuality from the Institutefor the Advancement of Human Sexuality. She is a regular guest on The Today Show and The Doctors and a go-tosource on sexuality for Cosmopolitan, Bustle, and Harper'sBazaar. She has been profiled in The New York Times, Forbes,and Men's Health. You can learn more here: https://sexwithemily.com/

This call is about deciding whether or not to rekindle a relationship after experiencing infidelity or betrayal. Today's call was originally intended to be a couples session with Jade and Matthew. But, Jade has decided to exclude Matthew from the call. She describes why she made the decision. Some people can work through infidelity and have it strengthen their relationship. Other people need a clean break. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode409] What can happen when we are working through trust issues and articulating our needs is that when we get to a point where we are triggered, we throw up a barrier rather than a boundary. When we are a person who hasn't been great at boundaries in life, what can happen when we're pushed to an edge is we can just throw up a wall. Anytime we cheat, there's a part of us that's scared of intimacy with the person that we're with. There are a lot of other reasons but it's like we're afraid to go deep with the person we're with. There can be a pattern of not being able to be fully intimate and fully vulnerable in relationships. Most things that happen to us that aren't necessarily what we want to happen are on some level due to our soul calling in a situation to help us heal something that isn't optimal inside of us. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you often not hold boundaries to the extent of when you're pushed to an edge a wall and barrier comes up? Have you tried to forgive someone and tried to heal through relationships but you just keep getting hurt? Do you have a hard time trusting? Do you beat yourself up when you've been hurt because you think you should have seen it coming? Jade's Key Insights and Ahas: She found it difficult to trust Matthew as he traveled. She felt like he was hiding information from her. She has decided that she can't be in the relationship any longer. She felt energetically that things were off. She wants a healthy relationship in the future. She has questioned her truth when it comes to Matthew. She needs transparency in her relationships. She has a pattern of not being fully vulnerable and intimate in relationships. She thought she would feel enough if someone changed for her. She felt this relationship will help her heal from her previous relationship. She wishes her mom was emotionally supportive and less reactive. How to Get Over It and On With It: Examine her trust issues and why she continues to be in relationships with people she doesn't trust. Forgive Matthew without continuing the relationship with him. Create emotional safety for herself. Don't waste her time thinking she "should" have known sooner. Trust herself and give herself time to grieve without beating herself up. Get clear about her boundaries in a relationship and write them out. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a naturally slick ceramic surface. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on their full suite of products by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Anger. We all feel it at some point or another. It's a natural human emotion and expression. However the way we deal with our anger often is very unnatural. We suppress it, numb it, try to escape it or let it consume us so much so that it can make us sick and/or ruin our relationships. In this episode I talk about how to release anger in a healthy way and walk you through the process of writing an f*** you letter.

This call is about deciding whether or not to rekindle a relationship after experiencing infidelity or betrayal. Today's caller, Matthew, has childhood trauma that is affecting his adult behaviors. He wants to continue his relationship with Jade but struggles with self-worth and trust. This is the second of three conversations. In next week's call, Christine speaks with Matthew and Jade during the couple's session. Listen to Part One with Jade. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode408] Most of the time people don't act out intentionally to hurt other people, they're acting out because they're asking for help, even if it doesn't seem like it. When we have chronic trauma it is very hard for us to be aware of how it is affecting our behavior. When we look at behavior, especially something like unfaithfulness or cheating, if we just look at the behavior we can get angry. Angry at ourselves and angry at the person. We may call it unforgivable, and maybe it is. But when we look at what is underneath the behavior, what's really driving the behavior, it can give us a different perspective and move us into compassion and ultimately forgiveness. Compassion and forgiveness offer hope that a relationship can be healed. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who are ready to let go of their limiting beliefs. For a nurturing self-care experience join like-minded women from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat. Apply by July 10th to get the early bird discount. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you struggle with self-worth issues? Have you ever been unfaithful or have you been in a relationship where someone has betrayed you, lied to you, or been unfaithful to you? Did you grow up in a home where there was abuse and chaos and you never really felt worthy or loved or safe? Are you on a personal discovery journey and you're clear that you're changing things but the people around you may not believe you and that can be frustrating? Matthew's Question: Matthew struggles with self-worth and trust issues. He would like guidance on how to find internal validation and create a safe space for Jade. Matthew's Key Insights and Ahas: He lied, manipulated, and cheated during the relationship but, that's not who he wants to be. He feels Jade is having trouble trusting him again. He has trouble trusting Jade. He wants to heal his past traumas. He wants to feel loved, cared for, trusted, and secure in his relationship. He feels his needs can be met. He is on a self-discovery journey. He has always felt he was insignificant and had to fight for love. He has witnessed infidelity and abuse in his life. He is working on forgiving himself. He seeks external validation, mostly from women. He is seeking out ways to bring joy into his life. He is becoming aware of the energy he shares with women. He has an anxious attachment style in his relationships. He is in awe of who Jade is and sees potential in their relationship. He loves Jade but he feels he is under attack. How to Get Over It and On With It: Find ways to feel expressed, worthy, and validated. Discover what being a man means to him. Talk to an outside resource about his childhood wounding. Breathe deeply to calm himself when he feels defensive. Have compassion for himself and the things he feels shame about. Assignment: Write out the agreements he needs to make in the new version of this relationship. Write down the needs he would like to have met in a relationship. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Dr. Will Cole, health advisor to Gwyneth Paltrow, top functional medicine practitioner, and New York Times bestselling author has dedicated his career to teaching people to apply skepticism to nutritional trends and instead, pay closer attention to their own intuition. His new book, GUT FEELINGS, demystifies the gut-brain connection and provides a framework to repair the relationship between what you eat and how you feel. After over a decade as a functional medicine expert, Dr. Cole discerned that shame can cause gut inflammation and sabotage wellness through what he's named "Shameflammation." When you send signals to your brain that you are overwhelmed, overworked, or overtired, your body reacts. Shameflammation can be the cause of chronic health conditions such as autoimmune disorders, depression, IBS, and more.

This call is about deciding whether or not to rekindle a relationship after experiencing infidelity or betrayal. Today's caller, Jade, has recently been brought back together with someone she loves but whom she left because he betrayed her. This session is the first of three conversations. In next week's call, Christine speaks with Jade's partner. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode407] When we are betrayed and we are cheated on, of course, we feel anger and hurt, it was an awful thing to have happened, and we get to be mad and angry at the other person. But if we hold on to those things for too long then we're the ones who continue to hurt ourselves. For many people, infidelity or any kind of betrayal is a deal breaker and sometimes it's not. Sometimes there are so many other things leading up to the betrayal or infidelity that, of course, do not excuse it, but also contribute to why there might be an opening for forgiveness and an opportunity to rebuild the relationship from a fresh start. When it comes to infidelity or betrayal, it's not a black-and-white topic. Forgiveness is a process; it doesn't happen overnight and it is not something we can do just with our mind. We need to do it with our hearts and our somatic body. We need to move through those emotions of anger, sadness, hurt, and shame to get to a place of — "How do I really feel about this situation, and is my heart open to repair?" Consider/Ask Yourself: Have you ever been unfaithful in a relationship or have you been cheated on? What do you define as betrayal? Have you gotten clear inside your mind, inside your heart, and with your partner on what is a betrayal and what the agreements are in your relationship? If you have let someone back into your life after betrayal, have you been able to trust again or have you always been looking over your shoulder? Have you always lived with a sense of really not getting your needs met? Jade's Question: Jade is having trouble navigating trust in a rekindled relationship that ended through betrayal and infidelity. She would like guidance on how to move past the betrayal to build a new relationship. Jade's Key Insights and Ahas: After one year, her relationship ended with betrayal. Both she and her partner are doing work to rekindle the relationship. She is doing inner work to recognize when she is triggered. She loves her partner and recognizes the humanness in the betrayal. She fears self-betrayal by letting him back into her life. She knows letting him back into her life will be challenging. She doesn't know if she can ever trust him again. There was dishonesty in her past relationships. She felt not enough in her childhood home and didn't feel safe. Her mother did not validate or reassure her. She hasn't felt safe in her relationships. She is hyper-vigilant. She is leaning into the discomfort of the situation. How to Get Over It and On With It: Put prevention plans and agreements in place to start with a blank slate to create safety for herself in the relationship. Know that whatever happens, she is going to be okay. Find a place to process her feelings with someone else besides her partner. Do not worry about other people's guilt and shame. Release her fear and regulate her nervous system. Assignment: Write about trust and what it means to her. Write out the agreements that need to be made to move forward in the relationship. Sponsor: Sensate — is an infrasound resonance device that when paired with sessions in the companion app works towards reducing stress, and improving well-being. It provides deep relaxation in 10‒30 minute sessions to tone the vagus nerve. For $30 off your purchase, go to GetSensate.com and use the promo code OVERIT. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Jenny Eversole is the founder of Stylespace.com a virtual styling platform to elevate your style with expert stylists. After nearly a decade running her own fashion label, she learned how personal style can make a big difference in one's confidence, happiness and overall success. Jenny founded Style Space for people to discover their best style and to look, feel, and BE their best.

This call is about setting boundaries and taking care of your own needs. Today's caller, Caitlyn, has an expectation hangover about her engagement planning process. She is excited about her wedding, but her family and friends don't seem to be. We cover a lot of ground and we go really deep in this episode. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode406] Being a caretaker can be a survival skill. Survival needs can be the need to feel loved, valued, and like we belong. When one of our patterns is tied to those needs, it can be hard to release. Consciously, we may know it's not healthy for us to be a caretaker and that we should set boundaries but unconsciously, there may be a part of us that wonders who will love us and how we will fit into your family if we stop caretaking others. When our bodies are working hard to hold all of our suppressed emotions together it needs another outlet for release. Our third chakra, our energy center, is tied to personal empowerment. If we don't have boundaries and allow other people to suck our energy, things will shift within the body to compensate. We can manifest a physical ailment when keeping emotional issues bottled up or by not feeling empowered. Join in for the live group coaching call on June 22, 2003, at 5 pm PST / 8 pm EST on self-love. It's only $20 and you will get live access or if you can't make it live, it will be recorded and mailed to you so you can listen at any time. Go to ChristineHassler.com/group to save your seat. Consider/Ask Yourself: Is there a current expectation hangover upsetting you and reminding you of something that happened in the past? Do you relate to being a caretaker in your life? Are you afraid to stop taking care of others because you fear losing love or validation? Is it challenging for you to set boundaries? Do you say yes to things when you really mean no? Do you over-compromise and sacrifice your own needs because it is easier than upsetting people? Is there a prolonged physical condition you are dealing with that cannot be resolved? Caitlyn's Question: Caitlyn wants to know why she is having so many expectation hangovers while she is planning her wedding. Caitlyn's Key Insights and Ahas: She wants more support from friends and family about her wedding. She is trying to get out of the caretaker role in her family. She has always been a planner. She feels tired, disappointed, and hurt during the wedding planning process. She stepped into the caretaker role in her family as a teenager. She was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at thirteen. She taught people how to treat her. She is manifesting her physical condition. She gives away her power by always taking care of others. She puts herself last. Emotions were not expressed in her family. Her sister is also planning a wedding. How to Get Over It and On With It: Put herself first and not worry about other people's upset. Allow herself to feel her emotions. Connect and talk to her younger self. Say thank you to her illness for sending her a message. Start writing from her heart with release writing. Have self-compassion and know it is okay to be seen. Talk to her sister about the things that matter to her. Forgive herself for buying into the understanding that being a caretaker is a way to get love. Takeaways: If you are dealing with any type of expectation hangover, go back in time and ask yourself, "What does this remind me of?" Do the "empty chair" process at home. Let things go through journaling and release writing. Set and stand by your boundaries with people and let them be upset. Sponsor: Aquatru — purifies water using a four-stage reverse osmosis process. The countertop purifiers remove 15 times more contaminants than ordinary pitcher filters plus the water tastes fantastic. Their long-lasting and affordable filters are independently tested and certified to NSF standards to remove over 80% of the most harmful contaminants. Go to Aquatru.com and enter OVERIT at checkout to get 20% off any purifier. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Meet Mark Groves: Human Connection Specialist, founder of Create the Love and Mine'd and host of the Mark Groves Podcast. In other words, he's a speaker, writer, motivator, creator and collaborator. Mark's work bridges the academic and the human, inviting people to explore the good, the bad, the downright ugly, and the beautiful sides of connection.His purpose? To empower individuals to step into their power, transform the way they relate to themselves and others, and create authentic change for a life + love they'll look back on with a resounding "f*ck yes! Learn more: https://createthelove.com/

This episode is about leaning into femininity and recognizing self-worth. Today's caller, Lana, has childhood wounding that makes her wish she looked a different way. She would like guidance on how to be more feminine, have a healthier body image, and stop feeling jealous. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode405] Many women have mothers who did not have a healthy body image. And, often as children, we take that on. But, there is so much more than how we look. If we focus on how we look and compare ourselves to other people, we miss out on the incredible gifts that we are here to enjoy in this lifetime. We are constantly being programmed with what is "beautiful." We all have different ways in which the feminine expresses through us. It is essential for us to change the way society frames beauty for the future, for women, and for little girls. It is changing, but we have a long way to go. And, jealousy is a waste of energy. It is often a positive projection. When we look at someone who is "attractive," what we are really seeing is their confidence or the way they feel comfortable in their body. The next time you feel jealous, think about how you would rather be using that valuable, precious energy. Because jealousy kills our self-worth, sense of spirit, femininity, and relationships. It is no one else's job to make us feel secure in a relationship. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who want to go deeper into their consciousness, expand their femininity, get clear about their purpose, and heal wounds. Get exquisite self-care from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat. There is still time to get the early bird discount. Listen to this Coaches Corner episode to find out what happens during the retreat ChristineHassler.com/2022/08/coaches-corner-346. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you deal with jealousy? Do you think that if you looked differently that your life would be better? Did you grow up with a mother or a parent who didn't have a good body image and they passed that on to you? Do you know what being in your feminine and femininity means? Lana's Question: Lana would like tools to boost her body image and overcome jealous feelings in her relationship. Lana's Key Insights and Ahas: She deals with extreme jealousy but trusts her boyfriend. She has been in her current relationship for five years. She has low self-confidence. She doesn't feel feminine. She compares herself with other people. She's been hurt by relationships from her youth. Her mother didn't have a healthy body image. She is focused on looking a certain way. She is creative, loving, and has a big heart. Her soul wants acceptance for who she is. She puts a lot of energy into thinking she should look different. She wants to enjoy her life. How to Get Over It and On With It: Be compassionate with her feelings when she is triggered. Begin studying what it means to be in her feminine power. Instead of using her energy on jealousy and comparison, use it to enhance her creativity and joy. Sponsor: Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are beautiful, easy to clean and use, and non-toxic. The cookware and bakeware sets have a naturally slick ceramic surface. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the limited-time offer of 10% off on their full suite of products by using the promo code OVERIT at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

My friend and co-founder of Elementum Coaching Institute Alexi Panos joins me to talk all about the coaching industry. We cover why it's a GREAT time to be a coach, how to get over imposter syndrome, what makes an impactful and profitable coach, the "dark side" of the coaching industry and so much more. We also dive into why we founded Elementum and what makes this program so unique. Learn more here: https://elementumcoachinginstitute.com/

This episode is about embracing our gifts and making a living. Today's caller, Janelle, has lost the motivation to make a living by expressing her gifts. She would like guidance on how to reignite her drive. Christine offers her practical tips about shifting her limiting beliefs about money, and separating her survival needs from what brings her joy. [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode404] Our gifts do not have to translate into a career. Our gifts are there for us to enjoy them. They don't necessarily have to be the thing that makes us money. It is completely possible to have a job you like that isn't your passion. We all have gifts and some of them translate into a lucrative career and sometimes they don't. Give yourself permission to explore your gifts without the pressure of needing to make money at it. Many people feel like a failure if they can not make a sustainable income doing what they love but as long as they are expressing what they love there is no failure. It's important not to marry gifts and purpose with survival. At some point in our lives, we are asked to look at what we have done to meet our survival needs and consider what we have to do to be more strategic. When we have a "Watch, I'll show you" energy, it can push us but it doesn't generate a lot of safety and abundance because we are constantly pulled back by our old beliefs. A caterpillar works hard to become a butterfly. It's a metamorphosis that needs to happen. It completely transforms and transmutes things. When we are in the chrysalis moments, we need to ask ourselves what needs to transform. My upcoming Signature Retreat is for women who want to go deeper into their consciousness, release layers that need to go, expand their femininity, get clear about their purpose, and heal wounds. Get exquisite self-care from October 13‒15 in San Diego, CA. To apply go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat. There is still time to get the early bird discount. Listen to this Coaches Corner episode to find out what happens during the retreat ChristineHassler.com/2022/08/coaches-corner-346. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you doing something you love but not making the kind of money you love? Do you think you can make money and have enough to live doing what you love? Were your creativity, expression, and natural gifts encouraged as a child? Or, were you told you could never make a living at it? Do you have a good relationship with money? Janelle's Question: Janelle has lost her motivation to continue her dancing career and is looking for guidance on how to make a living following her passion. Janelle's Key Insights and Ahas: She knows her spiritual purpose. She is at a crossroads. She no longer feels excited about her career or art form. She is a professional dancer and actor. She expected to be more financially secure by now. The pandemic shifted her momentum. She is adaptable and independent. She was told being an artist would be a struggle. She was driven to succeed to prove to others that she could. She has completed the personal mastery course. She feels called back to her passion and desire. She has the tools but doesn't know how to use them. How to Get Over It and On With It: Shift her limiting beliefs about money. Do the "temper tantrum" technique and give her little girl a voice. Strategically consider her next steps and where she wants to go. Takeaways: Check out these Coaches Corner episodes with Jade Luna & Kate Northrup. Consider where you are. Is it time to take some risks and share your gifts with the world? Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Get ready for a great conversation about where we have been and where we are headed collectively with Jade Luna. Jade is the first Westerner ever to reconstruct Jyotish (Hindu Astrology) into a Greco-Roman format. Jade has traveled extensively around the planet, lecturing and conducting workshops on Astrology and Ancient Roman-Greco mysticism. He has traveled to India more than 30 times and spent a great deal of time with various teachers, Saints and Sadhu's in Asia. Jade also consults with people privately. He usually presents a few seminars each year at various locations world wide. He is the author of Asterian Astrology and has been one of the most successful Astrologers in the world and has maintained a high level practice for over 18 years.