Fully Functional Parents

David is a recess monitor during a Category 4 hurricane! And Katie’s there too!

Catching puke, relationship coaching, the Lottery: we’ve got room to improve!

Female prison guards fall in love too easily! And once again, Billy Joel impresses!! First season?!

Let me tell you how it went!

And no complaining about my complaining: wife version!

And that time David’s parents wore Nix the Shiks shirts!

Using Jergens liberally! And no Xmas decor until AFTER Thanksgiving!!

Watch Nobody Wants This on Netflix! It’s good! And we know the number one stupid human sign! And David’s incredible mathematical theory!!

Why are people always abandoning their shoes?!

A double episode of morning talk!

And she’s going to work!

A trip to NYC and pickle sucking!

And please rate our podcast 5 stars!! WTF!!

The best clothes are in your face!! Rerun Sunday!

And Is It Real?! Do you lie to your spouse?!

Kids and their comments about hair! And did you know that David hates BNL?! Well, he does!

Sneaking stuff in and pretending you’re not a slob!

Rescue takes on a whole new meaning! What does Denis Leary think of how we abuse firefighters? And is your house crawling with ghosts? Maybe! maybe Not!

Join us! Bring your kids!!

A classic conundrum! What do you do? And Lyric Lowdown! You’re welcome!! *Play It Again Saturday!*

Morning talk! We tell you things about these three men that are not facts!

And dating adults in high school?! Gross!!

A little Mystery Science Theater!

And sweaty backs?! And bad super powers!

Cause he’s straight out of a bodice ripper! And the last time Lunch Lad will report?!

From our FIRST season! You can hear the fireplace crackling! Enjoy!!

And the great saw acquisition of 2024! David’s finds on Facebook Marketplace!

And my delicate hands! And David’s parents’ fear of the… rain!!

She really did very little… and David has photo albums made!!

And renaming our house: Red Oaks! And bumper stickers!!

A bunch of stupid stuff! And some really really deep stuff too.

Rerun Saturday! Is our future capri pants and golf shirts? And what do you think about time travel, High Grant and Colin Firth? And accidentally thinking about Rollergirl’s kid sister!

He bops to the music and he ain’t nuts! And a gross story from David’s youth! And Chinese Fire Drills: offensively named but fascinating?!

And AI is our future! Let me teach you all about it! (Psych!)!

And Adam Sandler’s voice!

Memories that I thought were meh were good!

And I AM Phoebe!

Rerun Sunday! Marketing geniuses have convinced you to eat crap and to feed your kids crap!! Way to go, marketing geniuses!!

If Kamala is doing it, I’m doing it!!

And has a kid ever stared through you?!

The best worst game show ever! And changes to the u-scan?!

Brand names all the way for FFP! And our kids are nice to each other!

Remember when I was diagnosed with cancer? remember that thing growing on our kid’s neck? Remember when our kid had a seizure? What a year!! Oh and David’s too helpful! Stop helping, David!!

A-A-Ron!! Learn all about an issue David is facing! And how spray deodorant just can’t cut it! And the Zanket! It’s patented, don’t steal our ideas, Uncommon Goods!!

And I was a townie!!

And wine people! And discount beverages! And AI assistants suck!

And where did Aunt Susan’s casserole go?!

Reason #976 why David is incredible! And where did that sock come from?!

Another double episode! Cause I went to a conference!

Another double episode! Cause I went to a conference!