Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Before the age of two, children seek unconditional love, but not a lot of parents are able to provide it, resulting in unmet needs, fear of rejection, and fear of dying. These childhood experiences can now manifest as fears and sabotage your current relationships. That's what Tracy Crossley realized after a series of dysfunctional relationships. In this episode, Tracy talks about insecure attachment, how it can interfere with your relationships, and most importantly, how to break free from this vicious cycle and have a happy and empowered relationship. Tracy Crossley is a Behavioral Relationship Expert, author, and podcast host who specializes in treating individuals with unhealthy life and relationship patterns. Tracy helps clients transform impostor syndrome, insecure attachment, and negative belief systems, breaking the cycle of narcissistic damage, destructive self-talk, and more. With a background in psychology and an innate emotional intuition, which draws from her own personal experience, Tracy shows her clients how to permanently change the repetition of unhealthy, unhappy, and unfulfilled cycles, both personally and professionally. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:19 Tracy's lightbulb moment following a series of failed relationships. 11:13 Getting out of the insecure attachment loop. 17:42 How your emotional armor is limiting you. 21:01 What to do when you're in an uncomfortable or anxious situation. 30:48 Ways to overcome your fears. 46:53 Learn more about Tracy's work and programs to help you overcome your fears. Mentioned The Method Mastery Overcoming Insecure Attachment! 8 Proven Steps to Recognizing Anxious and Avoidant Attachment Styles and Building Healthier, Happier Relationships (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Connect with Tracy Crossley Websites: tracycrossley.com Facebook: facebook.com/TransformativeCoach YouTube: youtube.com/c/TracyCrossley/videos Instagram: instagram.com/tracylcrossley/?hl=en TikTok: tiktok.com/@tracylcrossley?lang=en Podcast: Freedom from Attachment Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

We all know that disagreements are an inevitable part of every relationship, but would you agree that they are not personal? According to Drs. Michael and Barbara Grossman, conflicts between partners are not personal but rather part of a healthy development process. In this episode, they share their own experiences, struggles, and attempts to figure out how to keep their relationship thriving as well as the skills they learned from different mentors that ultimately inspired them to support couples going through these transitions in their relationships. For over twenty-five years, Drs. Michael and Barbara Grossman have taught thousands of couples practical skills to create a fulfilling romantic partnership. They have made TV appearances on CBS, NBC, Fox, and CW. They share powerful secrets to having a fulfilling long-term romantic partnership with a genuine love that lasts forever through all the phases of life. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:04 What Dr. Michael and Barbara learned in their 50 years of marriage. 11:32 Understanding why our developmental paths are not on the same timeline and how that relates to the power struggle stage. 23:59 The foundation of a healthy and long-lasting romantic relationship. 30:39 How marriage has evolved over the last 150 years, as well as some important relationship skills you can learn through ballroom dancing. 38:55 Final golden nuggets of advice. Mentioned The Marriage Map: The Road to Transforming Your Marriage From Ordeal to Adventure (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) The Magic of Stem Cells: Activating Your Own Healing Power: How to Avoid Surgery and Rejuvenate Your Body (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) AGELESS LOVE: The Sexy Science of Falling in Love Forever - Prescriptions for Mind, Body and Spirit (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love Connect with Dr. Michael and Dr. Barbara Grossman Website: fallinginloveforever.com Facebook: facebook.com/themarriagemap YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCv5BQU8rcraNzjzsA4LxzKA Affiliate Link: fallinginloveforever.idevaffiliate.com/signup.php Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Frequencies such as WiFi and radio are all around us. Although our brains are not equipped to see or hear these, we know that they exist. In the same way, frequency, also known as lifeforce energy, runs through our bodies at all times. In this episode, Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver discuss how to work consciously with the lifeforce of sexual energy as a transformational vehicle to make deeper and more meaningful connections not only in romantic relationships but also in other aspects of life. Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver have assisted thousands of couples and singles create lasting intimacy and fulfillment in their life and relationships. They are featured on Showtime's documentary series Sexual Healing and the Emmy Award-winning NBC show Starting Over, best-selling authors of Sexual Enlightenment endorsed by world-renowned Spiritual Pioneer Dr. Michael Beckwith and the co-founders of TantraNova Institute in Chicago. Elsbeth and Freddy Zental are beloveds, husband & wife as well as business partners residing in Chicago. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:18 How Elsbeth and Freddy came to share their intimacy and love message. 12:38 Elsbeth's quest for fulfillment led her to the Tantric intimacy journey. 20:39 How sexual enlightenment benefit individuals and couples, and how it manifests in various areas of one's life. 25:21 Understanding how energy flows in our bodies. 50:08 Workshops and products to assist individuals and couples on their journey. 51:31 Final words of wisdom. Mentioned Sexual Enlightenment: How to Create Lasting Fulfillment in Life, Love, and Intimacy (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Sustaining Masculine Pleasure Awaken to Your Feminine Essence Secrets to Lasting Intimacy Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love Connect with Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver Websites: tantranova.com Facebook: facebook.com/TantraNova Twitter: twitter.com/TantraNova YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCKincrF-VHfsabcIvsbQEhQ Instagram: instagram.com/tantranova_institute LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/elsbethmeuth Pinterest: pinterest.com/elsbethfreddy/tantranova Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

People who care for loved ones suffering from addiction or mental health issues are frequently labeled and even pathologized as part of the problematic and addictive cycle. Dr. Robert Weiss would like to honor, validate, and acknowledge the love and effort of these people who choose to stick around and help their loved ones get better, whether or not they are doing it correctly, because the truth is that most of us are not trained to assist someone who is dealing with these issues. In this episode, Dr. Weiss gives context for codependency and its significance around addiction, as well as the new concept of Prodependence, a less stigmatizing way of looking at and treating addicts' loved ones that is rapidly replacing this model. Robert Weiss Ph.D., LCSW is Chief Clinical Officer of Seeking Integrity LLC, working with sex, porn, and substance/sex addicted men. He is the author of 10 books, including Prodependence, Sex Addiction 101, and Out of the Doghouse. His Psychology Today blog, Love and Sex in the Digital Age, has over 20 million readers to date, and his podcast, Sex, Love, & Addiction, has more than 600,000 downloads since its inception in 2019. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 12:17 Dr. Robert Weiss and his incredible passion for educating people. 14:13 Why Dr. Weiss disagrees with the codependency model. 23:15 Codependency versus Prodependency, particularly in intimate relationships. 29:37 Recognizing people's love and effort in caring for loved ones with addiction and mental health issues. 39:30 Understanding why some people become addicted to alcohol, drugs, or whatever substance they prefer. 46:48 Why is it vital to change one's perspective when working with loved ones? 53:45 How to connect with Dr. Weiss. Mentioned Prodependence: Beyond the Myth of Codependency, Revised Edition (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Shifting Criticism For Connected Communication Connect with Dr. Weiss Websites: seekingintegrity.com — sexandrelationshiphealing.com Facebook: facebook.com/SexandHealing Twitter: twitter.com/robweissmsw — twitter.com/SexandHealing LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/sexaddictionspecialist Podcast: Sex, Love, and Addiction Blog: Love and Sex in the Digital Age (*Psychology Today) Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Different factors, such as social, political, and cultural, influence parenting styles. While one parent may be more concerned with their child's sense of agency, whereas the other might be more attentive to their child's sense of feeling supported. These differences can pose conflicts that not only confuse children about how to behave and what to expect in response but can also destroy a marriage and a family. In this episode, Nellie Harden discusses these differences further, as well as how parents can align their parenting styles to strengthen not only their marriage but also to equip their children with the confidence, respect, and wisdom they need to go out into the world as their unique and amazing selves. Nellie is a Family Life & Leadership Coach who focuses on helping parents eliminate power struggles with their daughters and help them grow into confident, wise, and respectful young women that are actually ready for the world! She is a wife and mom to four daughters, an author, speaker, podcaster, a homeschooling parent, and an adventure chaser and believes in a life of intention and making dreams and goals realities. She knows that the best way to help the world is through one living room at a time! Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 6:20 Two significant events that awakened Nellie's sense of purpose. 13:37 The egocentric nature of children and how parents can help them have positive confidence and self-esteem. 20:23 Conflicts over parenting styles and decisions and how to deal with them. 31:47 Honoring and respecting both parents' core beliefs and getting the right balance. 38:13 How to identify and choose the right path towards growth. 42:04 Tips for strengthening family bonds. Mentioned Ignite Her Joy Workshop: 5 Steps to Grow Your Daughter's Self-Esteem During the Tween and Teen Years Map to Maturity Connect with Nellie Harden Websites: nellieharden.com Facebook: facebook.com/groups/the6570project Instagram: instagram.com/nellieharden Podcast: The 6570 Family Project Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

It's amazing how couples can function as two distinct individuals in a relationship. Maintaining your own identity while encouraging your partner's interests and personal goals is gold. On the other hand, individual independence can be toxic too. It can make you feel like you're competing with your spouse, getting into a power struggle, and everything else that comes from these two individual perspectives. In this episode, Terry Real encourages us to consider the consequences of approaching a relationship from a toxic individualism perspective and how critical it is to shift to a relational mindset as he shares some actionable steps from his new book, Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. Terry Real is an internationally recognized family therapist, speaker, and author. He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents, along with a professional training program for clinicians to learn his Relational Life Therapy methodology. He is the bestselling author of I Don't Want to Talk About It, How Can I Get Through to You?, and The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Work. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 9:18 The inspiration behind the book, Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. 12:42 What is toxic individualism and how does it affect relationships? 20:14 How to make the transition from automatic response to conscious communication? 23:52 How to empower your relationship. 46:00 Key takeaways. Mentioned Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) How Can I Get Through to You? Closing the Intimacy Gap Between Men and Women (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Work (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Connect with Terry Real Websites: terryreal.com — relationallife.com Facebook: facebook.com/TerryRealRLI YouTube: youtube.com/user/TerryRealRLI/feed Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

There are a lot of moving parts in relationships, such as your background, having children, career, previous relationships, and so on. So, how can you cultivate a more secure and intimate relationship with your partner? Should you lower your standards and expectations in order to avoid disappointment? Linda Bloom strongly disagrees with this notion. In this episode, Linda talks about how she and her husband took their relationship to the next level after a five-year irreconcilable difference gridlock and how they are now helping other couples cultivate an empowered relationship. Linda Bloom, L.C.S.W., is a psychotherapist and marriage counselor who teaches relationship workshops. She is the co-author of four books including the best-selling 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married (over 100,000 copies sold). She is a regular teacher at Esalen Institute and Kripalu, with over 600 blogs on Psychology Today with over 10 million hits, and over 100 videos on her YouTube channel. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 6:45 Linda and her husband's journey to becoming an empowered couple that inspires other couples. 10:01 What true empowerment entails. 13:42 Limiting beliefs that keep people from gently and consistently co-creating a highly romantic relationship. 18:52 Lowering expectations versus encouraging one another to become their best selves. 22:37 Traits and characteristics of couples who have empowered relationships. 33:16 How to manage differences: the growth mindset. 40:45 Finding psychosocial support. Mentioned Link to 3 free e-books: An End to Arguing, The Ten Biggest Things We've Learned Since We Got Married, and Your Guide to Great Sex. 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Secrets of Great Marriages: Real Truth from Real Couples about Lasting Love (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Happily Ever After... and 39 Other Myths about Love: Breaking Through to the Relationship of Your Dreams (book) ERP 013: Balancing Intimacy and Autonomy in Relationship ERP 297: How to Enhance Emotional Intimacy in Your Relationship in Your Relationship – An Interview with Amber Dalsin ERP 300: How to Set Your Relationship Up for Success ERP 100: Three Building Blocks For A Conscious Intimate Relationship Shifting Criticism for Connected Communication Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love Connect with Linda Bloom Website: bloomwork.com Facebook: facebook.com/lindaandcharliebloom Twitter: twitter.com/bloomwork YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCV3lPZs0gRNYCTQ6vgz4Q6Q Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Conflicts are opportunities to learn more about your partner, and depending on how you handle them, they can either bring you closer together or lead to a toxic dynamic, or worse, an abusive relationship. If it's the latter, how do you determine whether to stay or leave the relationship? While some people recognize that they should leave an unhealthy relationship early on, others choose to stay. Dr. Amelia Kelley shed some light on why these people aren't making the same decision. She also discusses warning signs of abuse or potential abuse, as well as how to empower someone in an abusive relationship to stop this dynamic, find support, and heal from trauma. Dr. Amelia Kelley is a trauma-informed therapist who has conducted research on the effects of exercise on ADHD symptoms as well as the effects of resiliency on PTSD. She is a trained Hypnotherapist, Art therapist, HSP Therapist, EMDR-informed therapist, and meditation and yoga teacher. She is a presenter and writer in the "science-help" field focusing on relationships, Highly Sensitive Persons, trauma, motivation, healthy living, and adult ADHD. She is a guest podcast presenter focusing on women's issues and coping with the trauma of unhealthy relationships, as well as a coach and trainer for SAS's Work/Life Program in Cary, NC, and a resident trainer for the NC Art Therapy Institute. Her practice is also currently part of the Traumatic Stress Research Consortium at the Kinsey Institute. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:00 The increased domestic violence during the pandemic. 7:02 Dr. Kelley's "aha!" moment that got her interested in helping people who have experienced trauma. 9:49 Why do people react differently to trauma? 14:38 Signs of a potentially abusive person. 28:50 Significant reasons why people are unable to confront or exit this situation. 38:52 Why highly sensitive people struggle more with decision making. 42:41 How to discern whether or not you should end the relationship and where someone in an abusive relationship can find support. Mentioned What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Internal Family Systems Model (*Wikipedia) Connect with Amelia Kelley Websites: ameliakelley.com — insighttimer.com/kelleycounseling Facebook: facebook.com/DrAmeliaKelley/ Twitter: twitter.com/DrAmeliaKelley Instagram: instagram.com/drameliakelley/ Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

One of the benefits of knowing your family history is that it can help develop a strong sense of who you are, but did you know that it can also reveal some dysfunctional patterns that may be affecting your relationships? If you're having difficulties and/or feel stuck, ask yourself the following questions: What was the pattern? Who else in the family system was stuck? Am I borrowing that pattern from them? Is it costing me or serving me? What is my destiny with this pattern when I take it on? It's worth noting that if you notice patterns that you tend to replicate over and over again, it's possible that your mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, or other family members did as well. The good news is that revealing these patterns could help you stop these particular problematic patterns that have been repeated in the family for generations. In this episode, Judy Wilkins-Smith discusses Family Constellation work, a therapeutic intervention used by therapists to gain insight into a client's family history, dynamics, and potentially dysfunctional patterns, as well as some resources to help you get started on your own journey. Judy Wilkins-Smith is a highly regarded organizational, individual, and family patterns expert. A systemic executive coach, trainer, facilitator, thought partner, and motivational speaker, she has 18 years of expertise in assisting high-performance individuals, Fortune 500 executives, and legacy families to end limiting cycles and reframe challenges into lasting breakthroughs and peak performance. Passionate about visionary leadership and positive, accelerated, global change, Judy uses her ability to understand systems and patterns to create growth and success. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 10:23 Understanding what the Family Constellation is and how they affect you. 22:07 A real-life example of someone in a relationship who is repeating a similar pattern. 33:00 Discover the wow version of yourself in a practical and logical manner that you can apply and use on a daily basis. 43:48 Developing a purpose and staying on track. Mentioned Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint: A Powerful Guide to Transformation Through Disentangling Multigenerational Patterns (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Capability & Resilience DNA (Upcoming Event) Emotional DNA (Upcoming Event) Connect with Judy Wilkins-Smith Websites: judywilkins-smith.com Facebook: facebook.com/judywilkinssmith Instagram: instagram.com/judywilkinssmith/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/judywilkinssmith Youtube:youtube.com/channel/UC2deofVCmw7Fxdq866SpJbQ Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Many professionals believe that fantasy is perfectly normal and harmless. They can be a reliable source of comfort, stimulation, escape, or relief. It can also be used to address long-standing relational needs and activate unconscious feelings of loss and emptiness. Unfortunately, people who utilize sexual fantasy as a primary coping mechanism may become disconnected from reality. Fantasies can be so addictive and compelling that they impair one's ability to be present in a relationship. And that's exactly what one of our listeners has been going through. In this episode, we look at how fantasies can reveal unmet needs and how to break the cycle, increasing your chances of experiencing supportive connections that cultivate the experience of intimacy and togetherness. Here's listener B's question: "My partner and I have been in a relationship for 10+ years - he was severely depressed at the beginning of COVID lockdowns due to job loss and medical issues. Because of this, our already minor codependency habits became incredibly magnified. Taking care of him and trying to 'fix' him became my entire life, while that only resulted in him feeling more worthless. This lasted for 2 years. During that time, I would often fantasize about another life, about being with someone else (unfortunately a friend of ours took that form in my thoughts), or just being single in general. It was an escape to feel somewhat good for a moment. In the past few months, however, things have changed quite dramatically (new medications for us both, new job offers) and it's all for the better! He's made significant improvements mentally and in his commitment to our relationship as well. ...So why doesn't it feel better? I still have the fantasy thoughts even though I don't want to, and on off days when I feel anxious or depressed, I convince myself that I shouldn't keep trying and it would be kinder to him to end it (which I have tried to do twice now) I do deal with some obsessive thinking and am medicated for ADHD - but how do I break this hurtful cycle? How do I get myself to realize we're in a good spot again, and that I don't need to rely on the coping mechanisms I developed when they weren't?" Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 6:18 When does a normal fantasy become unhealthy? 13:29 How fantasies can affect your relationship. 21:17 What do your fantasies reveal about you. Mentioned Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship (book) Healthy Lust vs. Unhealthy Lust ERP 316: How to Recognize & Deal with Emotional Immaturity — An Interview with Dr. Eddie Capparucci ERP 286: How to Know If You Experience Limerence & What to Do About It – An Interview with Dr. L ERP 105: How to Deal With Limerence in Relationship Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Most of us hope to find that one true love that would stand the test of time but that is not the case for everyone. Some people jump from one relationship to the next without fully understanding why the previous ones failed in the first place. If the majority of the people you've dated turned out to be cheaters or abusers, you may be wondering what is wrong with you? Most importantly, how do you break free from these negative relational patterns? In this episode, we'll dive into understanding why you keep attracting the same type of people in your life and how you can use your past experiences as teachable moments in finding the love that you truly deserve. Natasha is the Founder of Love CEO Institute, a personal development company for women. As a recovered love addict, Natasha has seen and experienced self-doubting, a negative mindset, and an imbalance in work and life that keeps women from reaching their greatest potential. Through the development of her one-woman show, "Evolution of a Love Addict," several years of counseling, and serial entrepreneurship, Natasha turned her life around and elevated herself from love addict to Love CEO. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:10 How she became the person she wished she had 15 years ago. 14:55 A painful moment in her life that turned her into a love addict. 19:55 A new perspective on love and dating. 30:35 What exactly is love addiction, and how do you show yourself love? 36:09 What she discovered in her research that she is now applying to her new relationship. 45:42 Key pieces of advice for women who are going through the same difficulties. Mentioned Evolution of a Love Addict: A Love Affair Between the Pages Free 5-Day Self-Care Workshop Evolution of a Love Addict Connect with Natasha McCrea Websites: natashaMcCrea.com ⁠— loveceocommunity.mn.co Facebook: facebook.com/TheRealNatashaMcCrea Twitter: twitter.com/natashamccrea Instagram: instagram.com/natashamccrea Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Every relationship goes through five developmental stages. The first stage is typically the romance stage, also known as the honeymoon stage. However, as you become more acquainted with your significant other, you will begin to notice some differences between you and your partner. Then, as either of you attempts to return to the early ideal phase or pushes forward into some imagined future that neither you nor your partner agreed to, a power struggle may occur. In this episode, we'll look at each developmental stage, as well as some skills you can learn to cultivate a long-lasting relationship. Dr. Chelsea Wakefield is a couples therapist and Associate Professor at the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences where she is the Director of the Couples Center. She is a popular keynote speaker and workshop leader, trains practitioners worldwide, and offers online programs in her unique approach to relationship transformation. Dr. Wakefield is the author of three books, her recent release is entitled The Labyrinth of Love – the Path to a Soulful Relationship. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 4:53 What she learned from her parents' challenges, which resulted in their 30-year marriage ending in divorce. 8:53 Understanding the road map of intimate relationships, from enchantment to disenchantment. 14:20 Six crucial love capacities that partners must cultivate. 20:50 Recommendations for when you feel a surge of reactivity. 30:13 Communication techniques that can help people slow down. 42:35 Learn more about how Dr. Chelsea Wakefield can assist you. Mentioned The Labyrinth Of Love: The Path to a Soulful Relationship (Amazon affiliate link*) (book) Negotiating the Inner Peace Treaty: Becoming the Person You Were Born to Be (Amazon affiliate link*) (book) Ineffective Behaviors Partners Use To Cope Ellyn Bader (pdf file) Negotiating the Inner Peace Treaty: Becoming the Person You Were Born to Be The Roadmap of Intimate Relationships Challenging Choice Points for Using the Initiator-Inquirer Process What is Imago Relationship Therapy? The Dialogue Therapy Connect with Dr. Chelsea Wakefield Websites: chelseawakefield.com Facebook: facebook.com/ChelseaWakefieldPhD Podcast: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/love-in-the-time-of-covid/id1507998764 Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Growing up, men are taught, either directly or indirectly, that showing emotion is a sign of weakness, and that if they do, they will be mocked. Vulnerable is almost a derogatory term for men. As a result, the vast majority of men have low emotional IQ, which correlates with low relational IQ because we need that emotional component to make the relationship more vibrant and exciting. In this episode, Dr. Eddie Capparucci will elaborate the root cause of the problem behind the behaviour and how he exclusively assists men in identifying and addressing these issues. Dr. Eddie Capparucci is a licensed counselor and coach, certified in treating Problematic Sexual Behaviors, and is the creator of the Inner Child Model for the treatment of sex/porn addiction. Eddie has worked with professional athletes and television personalities. He is the author of several books including Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction and Why Men Struggle to Love: Overcoming Relational Blind Spots. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:24 Dr. Eddie Capparucci's inspiration in helping men with problematic sexual behaviors. 11:24 The correlation between low emotional IQ and low relational IQ. 12:52 The root of all addiction. 15:55 Encouraging men to identify and express their emotions. 17:49 What causes character defects and how to deal with them. 28:41 The blind spots that prevent men from bonding emotionally. 33:51 How he is helping men explore their unresolved childhood pain points. 41:50 Hide and Lie. 44:56 Resources and tools to help men. Mentioned Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction: The Road to Recovery Goes Through Your Childhood Paperback (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Why Men Struggle to Love: Overcoming Relational Blind Spots *Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Connect with Dr. Eddie Capparucci Websites: innerchild-sexaddiction.com, strugglingmen.org LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/capparucci Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Sexual infidelity is one of the biggest issues in long-term relationships and failing to address it will only make the problem worse. Most people find sexual communication difficult. It's easy to believe that we can't do it because we just don't have the necessary resources to do so. We understand the importance of communication, but how do we become more comfortable with it? In this episode, Dr. Tara teaches us how to boost sexual communication comfort as she shares her personal journey from several monogamous relationships and unfulfilling sex to being a sexually powerful woman. Dr. Tara is a tenured professor of relational and sexual communication at California State University Fullerton, an award-winning researcher, a relationship coach at luvbites.co, and a podcast host at Luvbites by Dr. Tara. She recently gave a TEDx Talk titled Become Sexually Powerful that highlights her 5,000-participant study examining factors that predict sexual satisfaction, and her journey from a sexually anxious girl from Thailand to a sexually confident woman. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:02 Her transition from being a sexually anxious girl into a sexually powerful woman. 13:16 The two sides of sexual communication. 18:08 Why do people engage in affairs rather than fix their sexual undesirable issues and how important is sexual communication. 24:28 Dr. Tara's top five favorite sexual communication practices. 35:09 Our need for affectionate touch explained. Mentioned Become Sexually Powerful ERP 314: How To Work Through The Complexities Of Sexual Desire In Relationship — An Interview Martha Kauppi Luvbites by Dr. Tara (*podcast) The Outlander Series Connect with Dr. Tara Websites: luvbites.co TikTok: tiktok.com/@luvbites.co LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/tarasuwin YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCrbW6PCKjgcxkq3dTvjjeyQ Instagram: instagram.com/luvbites.co Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Most of us know something about reproductive health yet almost nobody knows anything about pleasure. Pleasure is frequently associated with sex and like sex, it's an uncomfortable subject to discuss for a lot of people. But it is so much more than that. In this episode, we cover some of the reasons why we don't experience pleasure in our lives and how to work through these complexities of sexual desire in your relationships as Martha Kauppi creates a safe learning environment for this delicate subject. Martha Kauppi is a marriage and family therapist, educator, author, speaker, and AASECT-certified sex therapist and supervisor. She has a lifelong career in health and sexuality and is a senior trainer of the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy. Martha trains therapists all over the world to work more effectively with relational intimacy challenges and sex issues. She is the author of the groundbreaking new book Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients). (Self-help manual for Strong emotional intimacy.) Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:04 Martha's desire to educate therapists about sex issues. 14:13 How to enter a space where desire could flourish without feeling stuck in it. 17:17 How multiple systems work together and align in order for desire to happen and thrive. 23:01 Creating a safe haven for creative curiosity, flexibility, and connection. 35:35 Scheduled sex versus goal-oriented sex. 37:49 Some helpful resources to learn more about sexual desires. Mentioned Handling Sexual Challenges Like A Rockstar Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients) (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) ERP 287: How To Engage in the Art of Giving and Receiving: Using the Wheel of Consent — An Interview with Dr. Betty Martin Connect with Martha Kauppi Websites: instituteforrelationalintimacy.com Facebook: facebook.com/martha.kauppi LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/institute-for-relational-intimacy YouTube: youtube.com/c/MarthaKauppiLMFTIRI Instagram: instagram.com/martha_kauppi Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Are you one of the three Americans who have a step relationship today? Demographers expect that one out of every two Americans will be in a step relationship at some point in their lives. It's not easy being a part of a blended family. There are way too many factors to take into account. In fact, external step-family-related variables generate a high divorce rate in the US. It might be a lengthy and difficult process, but it is not impossible to succeed with the right mindset, guidance, and resources. And that's exactly what Ron Deal discusses in this episode. We'll go over what to expect, what activities you can do, resources, and advice for raising a healthy blended family. Ron L. Deal is one of the most widely read and viewed experts on blended families in the country. He is Director of FamilyLife Blended® for FamilyLife®, founder of Smart Stepfamilies™, and the author and Consulting Editor of the Smart Stepfamily Series of books including the bestselling Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages® and Becoming Stepfamily Smart (with Dr. Gary Chapman), The Smart Stepfamily: 7 Steps to a Healthy Family, and Preparing to Blend. Ron is a licensed marriage and family therapist, popular conference speaker, and host of the FamilyLife Blended podcast. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:38 Ron's motivation for a career in marriage and family therapy. 13:00 What you need to know about blended families. 19:55 A visual map to help you navigate the blended family territory. 36:06 Some growth activities that you can try. 45:04 How to get smart and guide your family forward in the right direction. Mentioned Preparing to Blend: The Couple's Guide to Becoming a Smart Stepfamily (*Amazon affiliate link) (book) Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart (*Amazon affiliate link) (book) FamilyLife Blended® Podcast Connect with Ron Deal Website: familylife.com/familylifeblended/blended-families Facebook: facebook.com/familylifeministry Twitter: twitter.com/familylifetoday YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UC7WmdqnETL3gCmWruBF0tpQ Instagram: instagram.com/familylifeinsta Pinterest: pinterest.com/familylifeministry Website: smartstepfamilies.com Facebook: facebook.com/SmartStepfamilies Twitter: twitter.com/RonLDeal YouTube: youtube.com/user/FamilyLifeBlended Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Sex is an expression of our love and passion with our significant other but over time our desire for it tends to fade away. According to Esther Perel, what makes sex really hot is the mystery. However, when we enter long-term partnerships, we lose that mystery. We understand the importance of maintaining sex in a long-term relationship, yet it's frequently a taboo subject to discuss. So, in this episode, Emily Pereira will share her story, knowledge, and effective practices that foster openness and transformation that can lead to a more intimate relationship. Emily Pereira is an International retreat leader, yoga teacher, and women's coach —coined by her clients as the "Relationship Whisperer". After 13 years of intensive and extensive spiritual training and exploration, she has amassed a treasure trove of astonishing wisdom + powerful practices. She's used these to heal her own love story and transform her life. Over the years, she's had the honor of helping hundreds of women ignite their intimate, heart-thumping, passionate, I got-your-back-no-matter-what love, and build the family and lifestyle of their dreams. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 4:48 The inspiration behind Emily's desire for helping couples rekindle their intimate relationships. 9:47 The importance of creating a new version of yourself that you can bring back to the relationship. 17:21 How to overcome the fear of trying something new. 19:50 Advice for people who don't even know what they want sexually. 38:20 About the programs that Emily offers to help couples ignite their intimate relationships with their partners. Mentioned The Quest (*Amazon affiliate link) (book) Legendary Lovership The Quest for Love Academy 7 Day Goddess Cleanse Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel (*Amazon affiliate link) (book) Connect with Emily Pereira Websites: emilypereira.com/about Facebook: facebook.com/bethebeginner Instagram: instagram.com/emily_begins Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Many people have this fairy tale view of love in which there is always passion, a lot of sex and everything feels wonderful. It may appear that way at the start of the relationship but once the infatuation stage wears off, the reality sets in. You'll then realize your partner isn't as perfect as you thought. So, what comes next? In this episode, Kimberly Holmes gives an in-depth explanation of the three components of love and the four stages of the love path, as well as some actionable steps you can take to keep the fire burning in your relationship. Kimberly Beam Holmes has applied her master's degree in psychology for over 10 years, acting as the CEO of Marriage Helper & CEO and Host of her own podcast, It Starts with Attraction, being a wife and mother herself, and researching the ways that attraction affects people personally and the relationships that they hold dear. She is currently working on her Ph.D. in psychology. Kimberly lives in Franklin, Tennessee with her husband, Rob, and two beautiful children from India. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 4:13 Kimberly defines love and talks about a framework to falling in love. 6:04 The three components of love. 10:00 What happens when infatuation or limerence wears off? 17:47 How to overcome the power struggle stage. 25:27 How do you build commitment in a relationship. 30:05 What you should intentionally focus on as a couple when life tries to pull you apart. 34:00 How to cultivate strong attachment? 44:14 How they're helping couples save their struggling relationships at Marriage Helper. Mentioned Triangular theory of love by Robert Sternberg (*Wikipedia) It Starts With Attraction (*Apple Podcast) Couples Turnaround Workshop mini-course Connect with Kimberly Holmes Websites: marriagehelper.com/kimberly-holmes Twitter: twitter.com/marriagehelper (7.4k followers) YouTube: youtube.com/c/MarriageHelper/videos (170k subscribers) Instagram: instagram.com/marriagehelper (11.4k followers) Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Falling in love is human nature. The moment you are born and see your mother, you form a bond, and that is love. But if falling in love is that easy, why are there so many failed relationships? In this episode, we'll look into unhealthy relationship experiences, things that we have learned in the past that we tend to repeat in our relationships over and over again. Although these are part of who we are, the good news is that there is something we can do about it. Dr. Thomas Jordan discusses how we can unlearn these unhealthy habits and stop these vicious cycles. Dr. Thomas Jordan has helped thousands of individuals and couples enjoy more fulfilling relationships and experience more satisfying, longer-lasting love lives as a psychotherapist for the past 33 years. He is the author of a breakthrough book Learn To Love: Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life. Dr. Jordan specializes in the treatment of chronic love life problems and founded the educational resource Love Life Learning Center in 2012. In 2017 he launched the Healthy Love Life Seminar, leading love life educational seminars with his wife, a psychotherapist, Victoria Jordan, LCSW. He resides and practices in the Upper West Side of New York City. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 3:49 Three reasons that got Dr. Jordan interested in helping couples and individuals in their love lives. 17:27 Unhealthy relationship experiences that people tend to replicate in their relationships. 22:41 How our experiences and the after-effects influence our love life. 25:51 An overview of the 3-step unlearning method. 40:13 Dr. Jordan defines what a psychological love life is. Mentioned Learn to Love: Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) ERP 238: How to Find Your Emotional Balance in Relationship Take Him To Court For Child Support? How To Live Without Love In Your Life? Connect with Dr. Thomas Jordan Websites: lovelifelearningcenter.com Facebook: facebook.com/Dr.ThomasJordan/?ref=tn_tnmn Twitter: twitter.com/LLLearningCtr Instagram: instagram.com/lovelifelearningcenter LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drthomasjordan Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

We are all shaped and informed by our childhood experiences, and these experiences undoubtedly influence how we show up in our relationships. And, while our childhood is a part of who we are, it does not bind us to these limiting beliefs and relational models. In this episode, we discuss how we can manage our thoughts and change the stories that we tell ourselves. We'll look at Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) and how it can help you communicate more effectively and ultimately help us create newfound habits. Passionate about empowering others to succeed, as a Breakthrough Impostor Syndrome Coach, Linda Bonnar works with high-performing executives to ignite their self-confidence, maximize their potential and be the leaders they were born to be. Combining her fourteen years of experience in education with her wealth of professional coach accreditations, Linda provides business executives and organizations with an outstanding personalized coaching service that educates, empowers, and encourages powerful, successful change through action. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:14 How childhood and growing up experiences impact your communication style. 14:54 What helped Linda change her narrative about her husband and previous beliefs. 24:33 The huge difference between being assertive and being aggressive. 27:19 How Linda is helping people with her coaching. 34:36 Things to be aware of and skills you need to learn. Mentioned Just Three Things: Bite-size ways to transform your life (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) ERP 248: How to Negotiate Skillfully to Reach a Win-Win in Relationship – An Interview with Juliet Grayson ERP 238: How to Find Your Emotional Balance in Relationship ERP 036: How to Offer the Gift of Listening Shift Criticism Into Connected Communication Course by Dr. Jessica Higgins Connect with Linda Bonnar Website: lindabonnar.com Facebook: facebook.com/groups/1395615284019836 Instagram: instagram.com/lindabonnar_lifecoaching LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/linda-bonnar-pcc-coach-87374689 Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Do you have to keep reminding your partner to take out the trash or put away the laundry? Well, you are not alone and it can be frustrating when you expect them to do something but they don't. As a result, you'd react negatively, and they'd respond negatively, resulting in a downward spiral that leads to a power struggle. In this episode, Christal Allen brings to light how decoding expectations can empower you in creating ease and fulfillment in your relationship by changing how you show up in the relationship rather than waiting for the other person to change. Christal Allen is an accomplished businesswoman, certified coach, and has a relatable down-to-earth vibe that makes you feel safe and cared for. Christal believes that women can change their relationships, household, and environments by how they carry themselves, believe in themselves and care for themselves mentally. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 4:32 An overview of Christal's work. 7:20 The human tendency to focus on what is negatively affecting and how this manifests itself in a relationship. 15:58 The downward spiral that leads to power struggles. 29:01 How Christal is helping couples shift their paradigm. 42:09 A few examples of how this process helped couples in their relationships. Mentioned Free 2-minute Quiz to find out "What Kind of Wife or Girlfriend You Are" Shift Criticism Into Connected Communication Course by Dr. Jessica Higgins Connect with Christal Allen Website: christalallen.com/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/christal-allen-harrahill-0982b296/?trk=pulse-article_main-author-card Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lifecoachchristal/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LifeCoachChristal YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/christalallen Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Everyone learns about money differently and these differences shape our perspective on it. And because it's closely linked to our safety and security, it makes it difficult to discuss. However, despite how awkward it may feel, financial conversations are extremely important in relationships. In this episode, we'll talk about starting a safe conversation with our partner about our finances and how it affects our relationships. We'll delve into understanding the deeper psychological processes to minimize arguments over money and level up the love in your relationship. Ed Coambs, MBA, CFP, CFT, is an internationally recognized thought leader in financial therapy, who has been cited by the Wall Street Journal, the Associated Press, and Time. He leads couples from financial despair and frustration into financial intimacy and connection using the latest in love and brain science. He earned master's degrees in business, counseling, and financial planning. He is a licensed marriage and family therapist, certified financial planner, and certified financial therapist. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:03 How the guys from his workplace and his relationship with his wife inspired Ed to explore financial intimacy. 13:31 How to prepare for a safe conversation about money with your partner. 21:10 Understanding attachment styles and multi-generation attachment and developing a new internal representation of safety and security. Mentioned The Healthy Love & Money Way: How the Four Attachment Styles Impact Your Financial Well-Being (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) The Couples Guide To Financial Intimacy Connect with Ed Coambs Websites: healthyloveandmoney.com/home LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/healthyloveandmoney Facebook: facebook.com/healthyloveandmoney Instagram: instagram.com/healthyloveandmoney TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@healthyloveandmoney Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Fewer and fewer people are opting to get married as time passes by. Is marriage outdated? According to Marcia Naomi Berger, absolutely not. However, marriage has changed. In this episode, we'll talk about how marriage has changed over the years and why so many marriages fail. We'll discuss some myths and expectations around finding the right partner and we'll delve deeper into understanding the benefits of being marriage-minded and some tips in creating this wonderful connection with you and your partner and so much more. Marcia Naomi Berger, MSW, LCSW, leads dynamic marriage and communication workshops, is a popular speaker at conferences, a clinical social worker with a private psychotherapy practice, and has taught continuing education classes for therapists at the University of California Berkeley Extension, Alliant International University, and various professional associations. She's the author of Marriage Minded: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love and Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You've Always Wanted. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:08 The crying need for people to learn how to have good relationships skills and create good marriages. 8:05 How has marriage changed over the years. 11:02 What makes a good marriage? 13:55 Myths and expectations that get in the way of a good marriage 16:48 What men think about marriage and what keeps some women from finding the right person to marry. 18:52 The benefits of being marriage-minded. 20:50 Marcia's advice to those who have lost their passion in marriage. 26:11 Tips for keeping the fun alive when there are so many demands. 29:29 How can people recognize and overcome what's getting in the way of a good marriage. 36:13 The Marriage Meeting framework. Mentioned Marriage Minded: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love (book) (*Amazon affiliate link) The Marriage Meeting Program: A Strengths-Based Approach for Successful Relationships Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You've Always Wanted (book) (*Amazon affiliate link) Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love (book) (*Amazon affiliate link) ERP 252: How to Deal with Sexual Performance Anxieties - An Interview with Dr. Ian Kerner Connect with Marcia Naomi Berger Website marcianaomiberger.com Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Our brains are hardwired to seek pleasure and avoid pain and that's what's been keeping us alive. However, that's a problem in this day and age where we have an overabundance of highly potent and reinforcing drugs at the tip of a finger. As a result, there's been a significant increase in the percentage of anxiety, depression, and other psychiatric problems as we are constantly seeking pleasure. In this episode, we'll learn what's happening in our neurobiology as we seek comfort in a dopamine-rewarding behavior as well as what happens when we learn to tolerate some discomfort. Understanding how our brains work will be extremely beneficial as we consider our personal development and relationships. Anna Lembke, MD, is a professor of psychiatry at Stanford University School of Medicine and chief of the Stanford Addiction Medicine Dual Diagnosis Clinic. A clinician scholar, she has published more than a hundred peer-reviewed papers and she sits on the board of several state and national addiction-focused organizations. Her new book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence explores how to moderate compulsive overconsumption in a dopamine overloaded world. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:04 Understanding how we develop tendencies for seeking pleasure and overconsumption. 16:06 How social media, other technology, and even food contribute to these tendencies. 18:48 Our propensity to notice the behavior. 24:34 How to start a healthy balance between pain and pleasure. 30:15 Some real-life examples of tolerating the discomfort and its benefits. Mentioned Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence (book) (*Amazon affiliate link) Stanford marshmallow experiment Connect with Dr. Anna Lembke Website annalembke.com Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

When we talk about mothers, qualities like nurturing, caring, and compassion always come to mind. Mothers are also known for putting everybody else's needs first and theirs last. And for many years, there's been a notion that mothering is a woman's natural role but as it turns out, we all mother regardless of gender and whether or not we have kids. In this episode, we discuss mothering with emphasis on the concept of self-mothering and how this can support us internally, which can essentially result in having better relationships with our partners. Dr. Gertrude Lyons is a professional life coach who is focused on exploring, demystifying, and democratizing the maternal power that lies within all women. She believes that motherhood is a transformational journey that all women can take with or without children and together, we can start a new conversation around modern motherhood. Dr. Lyons is the Lead Faculty member, Senior Life Coach and Director of Family Programs for The Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential. Through her work, she inspires people to take control of their own personal transformations. She has made it her mission to challenge traditional notions of mothering by facilitating raw, open conversations around mothering, womanhood, and parenthood that no one else is having. She has spent the last 19 years empowering individuals, couples, parents, and families to bring out their best selves through helping them realize meaningful, successful lives, with the aim of bringing new perspectives on personal transformation to as many people as possible. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 6:25 What is self-mothering? 11:31 How she rediscovered herself which ultimately got her interested in diving deeper into self-mothering. 16:27 The purpose of self-mothering. 23:59 How self-mothering looks like in men. 33:19 The deeper inner work: self-validated intimacy. 41:51 Some ways to start self-mothering. Mentioned Society of Femininity in Action Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships (book) Still Face Experiment: Dr. Edward Tronick (YouTube video) Dr. Jessica Higgins, Psychologist, Relationship & Transformational Coach (Google Review) Connect with Dr. Gertrude Lyons Website drgertrudelyons.com Facebook facebook.com/gertrude.lyons.3 Instagram instagram.com/drgertrudelyon LinkedIn linkedin.com/in/gertrudelyons/ Podcast mot(HER) with Dr. Gertrude Lyons Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

In this episode, we'll discuss an often overlooked skill that is so simple yet has a significant impact on how we negotiate relationships. We'll also talk about some tools and practices that can help us turn our disagreements into meaningful connections with our partners. Dr. Harville Hendricks and Dr. Helen Hunt are co-creators of Imago Relationship Therapy, and a social movement called Safe Conversations. Internationally respected as couple's therapist, educators, speakers, activist, and New York Times bestselling authors. Their 10 books, including the timeless classic Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, have sold more than 4 million copies. Harville appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show 17 times! Helen has been installed in the Women's Hall of Fame and the Smithsonian Institute. The list goes on and on. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 3:56 What safe conversation is and why it's important in building a healthy relationship. 12:58 How these safe conversations in the Imago Dialogue process help the relational culture. 28:19 Simple practices to remind us to value our partners, that they matter, and that we adore them. 39:13 The structure of the Imago Dialogue process: mirroring, validating, and empathizing. 42:54 What the on-duty, off-duty days are and how Helen and Harville use this method to make sure that they are connected when they go to bed. Mentioned Imago Relationship Therapy Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples Helen LaKelly Hunt - National Women's Hall of Fame Meet a Philanthropist - A Conversation With Helen LaKelly Hunt | National Museum of American History The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-regulation (Norton Series on Interpersonal Neurobiology) Still Face Experiment: Dr. Edward Tronick Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between: A Clinician's Guide Connect with Harville and Helen Websites: Harville and Helen and Safe Conversations Facebook: facebook.com/harvilleandhelen Twitter: twitter.com/HarvilleHelen YouTube: Harville Hendrix & Helen LaKelly Hunt Instagram: instagram.com/harvilleandhelen/ Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Just like Roy, some people jump from one relationship to another because they believe that the right person is going to fix their relationship challenges. What they don't realize is that they are just avoiding the pain. Eventually, they get hurt all over again and look for another relationship to fill the void. In this episode, Roy talks about self-sabotage in relationships, how that happens, and some tips to overcome them. Roy Biancalana is a certified relationship coach and a nationally recognized expert in the field of attraction and conscious relationships and is the host of the Attracting Lasting Love Podcast. Along with being a frequent TV analyst, Roy is the author of three number one best-selling books, the latest of which is Relationship Bootcamp: Hard-Core Training for Life, Love & the Pursuit of Intimacy. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 3:46 Roy's takeaways from failed relationships and limiting beliefs about love. 24:04 An illustration of self-sabotage and how a coach can help you become more self-aware. 27:42 Roy's seven relationship muscles for a healthy and sustainable connection. 34:12 A few pointers on how to change your mindset and overcome self-sabotage. 43:21 A relationship fitness test to evaluate yourself and how Roy can further assist you to get in great relationship shape. Mentioned The Attracting Lasting Love Podcast RELATIONSHIP BOOTCAMP: Hard-Core Training for Life, Love & the Pursuit of Intimacy book The Relationship Fitness Test Connect with Roy Biancalana Website: coachingwithroy.com Twitter: https://twitter.com/coachingwithroy YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/coachingwithroy/ Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

How do couples draw the line between business and romantic relationships? Managing a business is a powerful force that can take over the family in so many ways and have a significant impact on the marriage. It's a lot to take in and simply unavoidable. Unlike couples who are not negotiating business, it is critical to provide additional support to couples who are doing business and building a relationship under the same roof. In this episode, we'll talk about entrepreneur couples and what they're up against. Dr. Ellyn Bader shares some real-life examples as well as some tools to help navigate these challenges. Dr. Ellyn Bader is a psychotherapist and one of the early founders of couples therapy, as well as a recognized thought leader and trailblazer in relationship therapy worldwide. Through her informal research and thousands of sessions, Ellyn co-created the Developmental Model, a revolutionary approach to couples therapy that is highly adaptable to the complex needs of two people growing, changing, and staying connected in a relationship. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 5:37 Ellyn talks about the first-hand experiences that inspired her to help couples negotiate business and couplehood. 8:09 How to manage couple-time that is off-limits for business talk. 13:14 Six skills for living, loving, and working together: 14:46 Commitment. 19:38 Appreciation. 25:17 Negotiation. 32:34 Decision Making. 44:06 Where to find more information on Ownership and Roles with authority. Mentioned Peter Pearson, Ph.D., Emeritus The Daily Double 30-Day Challenge The CANDOR Solution: The Entrepreneur's Marriage Blueprint Couples as a Team The Developmental Model Entrepreneurs Marriage Intensive Connect with Dr. Ellyn Bader The Couples Institute website Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

To commemorate the 300th episode of the Empowered Relationship Podcast here's a special episode for you all! Since the premiere episode in 2015, our goal has been to help people feel more prepared and, as a result, set their relationships up for success by encouraging them to invest in the strength of their connection rather than second-guessing their partner choice. Learn how couples can shift into safer, more positive, and more connected patterns of relating as she discusses key findings out of a landmark relationship science study that was published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, which was first-authored by Samantha Joel. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 08:08 What constitutes a successful relationship, and why do some relationships thrive more than others? 16:06 Top relationship characteristics that most accurately predict a person's happiness. 30:00 Five personal attributes that can help predict a person's happiness. Mentioned A landmark study shows what makes a successful relationship Machine learning uncovers the most robust self-report predictors of relationship quality across 43 longitudinal couples studies Dr. Susan Johnson's website Gottman Institute Julie Gottman's wikipedia page Samantha Joel's citations on Google Scholar Podcast Rocket's website ERP 297: How to Enhance Emotional Intimacy in Your Relationship – An Interview with Amber Dalsin ERP 274: How Increasing Relationship Love & Health Can Impact Borderline Personality Disorder – An Interview with Gabrielle Usatynski ERP 169: What to Do When Depression Takes Hold in Your Relationship, with Dr. Susan Heitler ERP 166: How Perfectionism And Depression Affect You And Your Relationship – with Dr. Margaret Rutherford ERP 015: Do You Have a "Unity" or "Journey" Mindset In Relationship? Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

When confronted with situations that make us feel distressed, it's so easy to project those feelings onto others, and sometimes we don't even realize why we are feeling that way. This can be caused by deeply ingrained childhood beliefs that we might not be aware of. If left unaddressed, these can interfere with our ability to show our authentic selves to our partners. In this episode, Beth Miller shares how she overcame extreme anxiety and depression and how that transformed her personal and marital life. She explains how understanding your inner child leads to a deeper understanding of your relationship conflicts and so much more. Beth Miller is the founder of Soulify Wellness, a marriage coach, a teacher of psychology, and consulting hypnotist. She has coached many women who are on the verge of divorce and helped them transform their marriages into relationships filled with mutual love, connection, and support. One of her secret weapons is Hypno-journeying, a deep meditation that's rooted in psychology, and neuroscience. It helps women release beliefs that are keeping them stuck in relationship struggles. And while Beth focuses a lot of her work on supporting women, I do believe these principles are very applicable to however you identify in your gender. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 3:35 How Beth's brain bleed affected her marriage and what she did to save it that ultimately led to her journey of helping other wives with their relationships, too. 10:11 Using hypnosis to recognize triggers and how accessing your subconscious helps you heal from deep-rooted issues inside you. 17:16 How understanding your inner child can help solidify your marriage. 21:38 The beautiful transformation that can happen once you start addressing the root causes of your problems. Mentioned 3 Ways to Save Your Marriage True You Connect with Beth Miller Website Soulify Wellness Facebook facebook.com/soulifywellness Instagram instagram.com/soulifywellness Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Most of us are familiar with non-verbal communication being upwards of 80% of all communication and part of that is facial expressions. In this episode, Dan Hill talks about his journey and 20 years of experience in facial decoding. Learn about the seven core emotions and how facial decoding can be a useful tool in navigating intimate relationships. Dan Hill is an internationally recognized expert on the role of emotions and business, politics, sports, popular culture, and one's personal relationships. Among his 9 books, is Famous Faces Decoded: A Guidebook for Reading Others, which uses celebrities' examples to promote emotional literacy and the 23 facial expressions that reveal seven core emotions. Dan's TV appearances have included ABC's "Good Morning, America," NBC's "The Today Show," CNN, Fox, MSNBC, and front-page coverage and the New York Times. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 4:18 How Dan Hill's fascination with brain science led him to pioneering facial decoding in market research 20 years ago. 14:54 The 7 core emotions. 19:25 How facial decoding helps navigate intimate relationships. 30:11 Identifying contempt through facial expressions. 32:27 The upside and downside of anger. 39:25 About surprise and how this can be helpful in a relationship? 43:07 How fear or sadness can be fatal when it comes to communication. 46:38 What to do if you feel threatened. Mentioned Famous Faces Decoded: A Guidebook for Reading Others (*Amazon Link) Dan Hill's EQ Spotlight Gottman Love Lab Charles Darwin's Theory of Evolution Plutchik's Color Wheel of Emotions Tell all the truth but tell it to slant by Emily Dickinson ERP 261: How to Strengthen Your Relationship from a Polyvagal Perspective, an Interview with Stephen Porges Connect with Dan Hill Website Sensory Logic Facebook facebook.com/Emotionswizard/ Instagram instagram.com/emotionswizard/ LinkedIn linkedin.com/in/dan-hill-emotionswizard/ Twitter twitter.com/EmotionsWizard Youtube channel Sensory Logic Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

According to research, women are the primary initiators of divorce, with emotional intimacy being the most significant factor. In the early stages of a relationship, you may feel that intense sense of connection even without emotional intimacy because of the dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and pheromones making everything seem to be in perfect harmony. However, as time passes by, these neurotransmitters diminish. In this episode, we'll dive into understanding what emotional intimacy is as Amber Dalsin talks about her personal journey — from someone who craves connection into a love that she never thought was possible. Learn about the 7 key components of emotional intimacy and the different ways of cultivating this beautiful connection that can stand the test of time. Amber Dalsin is a licensed psychologist and couples therapist. She has delivered over 10,000 hours of One-on-One therapy services and has given professional talks to over 28,000 participants. Her mission is to help couples create intimate, loving, peaceful, and long-lasting relationships. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:43 What sparked Amber's interest in helping individuals with Couplehood. 11:33 The 7 pillars of emotional intimacy. 21:33 What stands in the way of helping people create emotional intimacy. 31:04 How to identify emotional intimacy problems and assess whether or not they are fixable. 34:25 Simple things you could do to spice up your relationship. 42:31 Gender stereotypes and how these might relate to emotional intimacy. Mentioned The Gottman Institute 5 Love Languages The 6-second kiss & the 20-second hug Mini-Course: Emotional Intimacy Blueprint Connect with Amber DalsinWebsite Ember Relationship Psychology Facebook Ember Relationship Psychology Instagram Ember Relationship Psychology Pinterest Ember Relationship Psychology | Couples Therapy Podcast Relationship Psych | Love | Marriage | Conflict | Psychology Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

In the spur of the moment, a simple argument can go out of hand if we focus on proving that we are right rather than seeking to understand our partner's emotional needs. We basically just listen so we can rebut. Whilst it does seem to be clever, it is not the same as understanding. So, what can we do to change that? Shari Foos dives into what Relational Mindfulness is and how we can apply it to create meaningful connections in both romantic and non-romantic relationships. Shari Foos is a licensed marriage and family therapist and creator of The Narrative Method. She holds an MA in clinical psychology from Antioch University, Los Angeles, and a Master's in Science in Narrative Medicine from Columbia University. A sought-after expert on the subject of relationship and meaningful connection, Foos' writing and commentary have appeared in a range of online and print publications including Real Simple, Huffington Post, Women's Health, KBLA, Fatherly, LA Weekly, and Bustle. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 04:53 Shari explains what Relational Mindfulness means. 09:06 Steps that you can do to regulate your nervous system enough to suspend and to engage in this practice. 26:17 Shari elaborates on The Narrative Method. 41:16 How to connect with Shari. Mentioned 10 Tactics for Finding Happiness During Times of Isolation and Loneliness On Becoming and Being a Mother by Shari Foos Connect with Shari Foos Website: The Narrative Method Facebook: facebook.com/thenarrativemethod Instagram: instagram.com/thenarrativemethod LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/thenarrativemethod Twitter: twitter.com/NarrativeMethod Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Research shows that practicing mindfulness helps reduce stress, anxiety, lowers blood pressure and improves sleep. If we make it a habit, aside from our mental and physical health, it can also improve every aspect of our lives. Can mindfulness improve our relationships, too? The answer is yes and in this episode, Caroline Welch talks about its benefits, some tips in incorporating it into our daily lives and so much more. Caroline Welch is the CEO and co-founder, with Dr. Dan Siegel, of the Mindsight Institute in Santa Monica, California. She began her mindfulness practice forty years ago while working in Japan as an English teacher. Welch's book "The Gift of Presence: A Mindfulness Guide for Women" has been widely acclaimed. Caroline offers lectures and workshops on the power of mindfulness to enhance well-being in our personal and professional lives including its role in supporting racial and gender equity. Stay tuned and learn how mindfulness can play a big role in bringing you and your partner closer! Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 5:14 Caroline's definition of mindfulness and how it started for her. 7:19 Some real-life examples of mindfulness. 12:54 Why is mindfulness important. 16:24 Features of mindfulness. 26:52 Understanding the 3 Ps: Purpose, Pivoting, Pacing. Mentioned Mindsight Institute website The Gift of Presence: A Mindfulness Guide for Women book (*Amazon Link) Guided Mindfulness Meditation Practices with Jon Kabat Zinn website The Telomere Effect: A Revolutionary Approach to Living Younger, Healthier, Longer book (*Amazon Link) What Kind of Woman: Poems by Kate Baer book (*Amazon Link) John O'Donohue's website Life on Purpose by Victor J. Strecher: How Living for What Matters Most Changes Everything book (*Amazon Link) Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff book (*Amazon Link) The Guest House poem by Jalaluddin Rumi Connect with Caroline Welch Website: carolinewelch.com Facebook: facebook.com/carolinewelchauthor Instagram: instagram.com/carolinewelchauthor Twitter: twitter.com/CarolineWauthor Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Friction and differences are breeding grounds for real conflicts, especially for couples. Because of one's environment, upbringing, situation, and other factors, we develop different personalities which can all contribute to our reactive patterns and biases. Personality is such a complex psychological concept but what if we can bring understanding to what's going on? See where these perspectives are coming from? That would be a real game-changer! Beatrice Chestnut, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist coach and business consultant based in San Francisco, and Uranio Paes, MBA is a world-renowned Enneagram teacher and business consultant. They are the founders of Chestnut Paes Enneagram Academy and the hosts of the Enneagram 2.0 Podcast. They are also the authors of the forthcoming book, The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up: Find Your Path, Face Your Shadow, Discover Your True Self. In their work around the world, Beatrice and Urano focus on using the Enneagram as a tool for personal and professional transformation. In this episode, they briefly talk about the nine personality types in the Enneagram, the habitual patterns around these types, and essentially how this can be a powerful tool in improving relationships. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 5:59 What's the Enneagram and what makes it so powerful 9:28 How the Enneagram can help with our relationships and how we interact with other personality types 10:37 Why it's recommended to get explicit and talk about it in couplehood 14:19 An overview of the nine types 33:35 Finding your type 42:25 About Enneagram Academy and other professional workshops they offer Mentioned The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up: Find Your Path, Face Your Shadow, Discover Your True Self (*Amazon Link) Enneagram 2.0 with Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes The Enneagram Academy Connect with Beatrice Chestnut Website: beatricechestnut.com Facebook: facebook.com/beatricechestnutphd Instagram: instagram.com/beatrice.chestnut LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/beatrice-chestnut-0493602/ Connect with Uranio Paes Facebook: facebook.com/uranio.paes Instagram: instagram.com/uraniopaes/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/ur%C3%A2nio-paes-624129 Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

The overarching reason couples seek help in relationships is to rejuvenate their connection and learn the skills to ensure the spark doesn't go out in the long term. Alicia and Erwan join me today to share their road map to creating and sustaining a thriving relationship life. They share the three key relationship stages and dive into why couples in long-term relationships should understand the benefits of maintaining early-stage skills, such as flirting, in the later stages of a committed relationship so it can thrive. Erwan and Alicia Davon have 25+ years of experience teaching singles and couples how to have exceptional romantic relationships while growing personally and spiritually. Their unique approach to relationship coaching combines their educational backgrounds in psychology with aspects of Zen Buddhism, providing a holistic method, improving connections with the self and others. They help singles have passionate and successful intimate relationships and guide couples to take their relationships to new heights of passion and intimacy. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 09:21 Alicia and Erwan discuss how they developed their relationship stages and how they identified and grew through them in their relationship 14:30 How to get back the juicy passionate chemistry of earlier relationship stages and why micro gestures are gold 16:06 What a relationship blueprint is, why it is carried throughout life, and how you can discover what your blueprint is 20:43 Relationships don't happen to us, rather they happen through us — why being intentional about how we design our relationship allows us to show up and be committed to our relationship 21:35 Alicia and Erwan's names for the stages in a long term relationship and how to make progress through those natural stages mindful 30:20 The skills that we need to acquire before moving to the next relationship stage, and Erwan's tips for managing the challenges of each stage 36:00 Four practices that Alicia and Erwan recommend people do every day, including spiritual and sensual practice Mentioned Schedule your free love life consultation with Alicia here The Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love Connect with Alicia & Erwan Davon Website: erwandavon.com Facebook: facebook.com/erwandavonteachings Instagram: instagram.com/erwandavonteachings/ Youtube: youtube.com/user/ErwanDavonTeachings Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Cultural patriarchy and heteronormativity often negatively impact sexual and relational development — but they can be difficult to recognize and challenge. On this episode of the Empowered Relationship podcast, we're talking about gender and its construction as we examine our society's cultural backdrop of hetero-normativity. Joe Winn joins me today to explore the principles to consider as we question ideas, notions, and messages that we receive around gender. Joe Winn is a licensed clinical social worker, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, and supervisor of Sex Therapy whose practice is outside of the Boston and Cambridge area. Joe has also lectured nationally and internationally on consensual non-monogamy, BDSM & kink, gender, and relationships. Joe is also a faculty member of The South Shore Sexual Health Center, an AASECT-approved training program for clinicians working towards certification in sex therapy. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 05:01 Why gender is such a problematic construct in our culture 07:45 Gender as viewed from a heteronormative perspective, and why people often perceive an LGBTQ+ alternative as an attack on their beliefs. 11:43 Joe's thoughts on whether patriarchy is at the foundation of the gender construct and the ways the discomfort and fear feed into homophobia 19:55 Why we need to allow ourselves to step into the transformative process of understanding our needs to better develop authentic relationships 23:50 How to start engaging with people interested in alternative concepts of sex and gender and seek out meaningful dialogue. 31:05 The importance of self-care, tuning into ourselves and putting ourselves at the center of our experience so that we can also support our partner 35:26 How to recognize moments of discomfort around gender and why we should turn towards them 40:00 Strategies we can use to learn and reset if we have been indoctrinated by society with rigid beliefs Mentioned South Shore Sexual Health Center website Connect with Dr. Joseph Winn Website: josephwinnlicsw.net LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/joewinnlicsw Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Understanding why love is not enough in an empowered relationship can be a challenge. So in this episode, Dr. Stan Tatkin helps us recognize some of the most common biological and human factors that take us off track when creating intentionality in a relationship. Having a scientific framework that allows us to understand why we need more than love helps us create a shared vision for our relationships. By unpacking common causes of relationship challenges, we can learn how to commit fully to a loving partnership and ensure it remains a beautiful and fulfilling experience. Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, is a clinician, author, researcher, PACT developer, and co-founder of the PACT Institute. Dr. Tatkin is an assistant clinical professor at UCLA, David Geffen School of Medicine. He maintains a private practice in Southern California and leads PACT programs in the US and internationally. He is the author of We Do, Wired for Love, Your Brain on Love, Relationship RX, Wired for Dating, and co-author of Love and War in Intimate Relationships. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 09:35 Why the basic human being is not built for long term relationships 12:25 Going passively into a relationship assuming that love is the key to success is not the best approach to take 14:05 The inner development that we have to commit to can sometimes be challenging 19:03 Stan shares his practical tips on how to create a shared purpose and vision as a couple 33:29 The importance of being cognizant of that we continue to evolve as individuals while developing our purpose, vision, governance, and ethics as a couple 33:48 Why we should intentionally create form-fitting principles to ground our relationship 40:32 How PACT can help couples improve their relationships Mentioned We Do: Saying Yes to a Relationship of Depth, True Connection, and Enduring Love, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Your Brain on Love: The Neurobiology of Healthy Relationships, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Relationship Rx, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Wired for Dating: How Understanding Neurobiology and Attachment Style Can Help You Find Your Ideal Mate, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Love and War in Intimate Relationships: Connection, Disconnection, and Mutual Regulation in Couple Therapy, by Stan Tatkin (*Amazon Link) Relationship Road Map Connect with Dr. Stan Tatkin Website: thepactinstitute.com Facebook: facebook.com/drstantatkin Instagram: instagram.com/drstantatkin/ Twitter: @DrStanTatkin Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Leveraging higher-level communication skills rooted in emotional intelligence helps drive connection, growth, and performance in professional and personal relationships alike. In this episode, leadership language expert Krister Ungerbock describes his TalkSHIFT™ System and explores how it elevates communication, morale, performance, and growth. Krister shares how you can hone your emotional intelligence to boost personal relationships and business growth. Learning how to communicate more effectively allows us to become better family members, spouses, and friends. When you pay closer attention to your words as well as your actions, you can avoid a communication crisis that could damage your relationships with others. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 5:24 We recognize how many of the principles of leadership communication also apply to partnerships and romantic relationships 14:40 How Krister found transformation personally and professionally and how his experience helps others in their relationships 20:08 A deeper understanding of the whole person increases the level of communication and gives insight into discovering where we are in our lives and what matters to us 25:28 Krister's most effective tools for improving communication in our relationships 31:56 The importance of asking direct questions about what someone needs from you at that moment and how that can help shift perspective in a conversation 38:28 The difference between being seen and unseen, and the challenge of seeing someone for who they are rather than who they were Mentioned TalkSHIFT Website Connect with Krister Ungerbock Website: krister.com Facebook: facebook.com/meetkrister Instagram: instagram.com/iamkrister/ Youtube: youtube.com/c/kristeru LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kristeru/ Twitter: @meetkrister Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

On today's episode of The Empowered Relationship Podcast, we are going through a laser coaching session. I speak to Vanessa and support her to refocus regarding her connection with her partner. One of the things that she is challenged with is getting stuck in the logical, analytical space where she weighs the pros and the cons in examining her relationship. Although this can be helpful occasionally, it can also get us in a holding pattern, where we go back and forth and don't get clear on the right path to take. In this laser coaching session with Vanessa, I help her access her emotions and recognize the parts of her relationship where she feels discontent and pain. When we have a void in our lives it can lead to a holding pattern in a relationship, but equally when we overanalyze our feeling it often keeps us from really being vulnerable and accessing the emotional deeper longing and discontent. One of the aspects that I'm intentionally trying to focus on in my coaching capacity is to help people access parts in themselves that they often don't slow down enough to connect with. We want to find the space to access the parts of ourselves that we might deny, repress or ignore so that we can explore them. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 04:50 How we can work together with our partner to resolve the differences in the relationship 07:07 Vanessa describes why she feels she and her boyfriend are in a holding pattern 08:53 We discuss Vanessa's internal list of pros and cons of her relationship and she shares the big-ticket items that she has discontent around 12:25 Lack of a depth of connection where Vanessa and her partner feel together, and why she feels like she can't currently lean on him 16:03 Why keeping busy masks issues and can prevent us from discussing significant issues in our relationships 18:44 The problem of feeling lonely in your relationship and Vanessa's reflections on how to resolve the issue 22:43 We discuss why planning for the future is a problem in Vanessa's relationship and why she is stuck in the analytic phase 26:05 I connect with the pain that Vanessa is feeling that is prompting her to question her relationship 27:00 Why it can be so hard to get clear when we're trying to figure our relationship out from an intellectual place 29:53 We don't get enough support or emphasis around how much this means to us on a nervous system level on a human survival level, to feel that responsiveness from our partner, to feel that engagement, to feel their availability 32:56 Finding someone who aligns with the things that are important to her is what Vanessa values in a relationship 42:58 Why I would strongly encourage working with the principles around Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) when you are feeling at a standstill in a relationship 50:39 The importance of getting outside our heads when evaluating our relationships Mentioned ERP 273: How To Handle The Concern Of Vulnerability Not Working In Relationship ERP 262: How Do I Know When My Relationship Has Reached An End ERP 112: What Makes Being Vulnerable So Hard? ERP 114: How To Develop The Strength Of Vulnerability ERP 115: How To Develop The Strength Of Vulnerability – Part Two ICEEFT Find A Therapist Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

On today's episode of The Empowered Relationship Podcast, Dr. Ian Kerner and I discuss what a 'sex script' is and why it can help couples achieve intimacy by rewriting our sex script. He shares his insights into why these sex scripts are not only based on physical behaviors and describes how he helps couples understand that psychological arousal begins with our minds. We dive into the details of why Dr. Kerner has been a longtime advocate for a new paradigm of sexual pleasure for heterosexual couples, focused around clitoral stimulation rather than the previous procreative model of sex. Dr. Kerner explores why the core of the orgasm gap between men and women is down to the differences in how men and women experience the plateau phase in the process of sexual response. We also discuss how getting into a state of 'neutral entrainment,' when you're relaxed and in the moment and feeling the erotic heat being generated, helps foster a sensual connection. Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT, is the co-leader of the sex therapy program at the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy and contributes regularly on the topic of sex for CNN. He is the New York Times best-selling author of She Comes First (Harper Collins), which has been translated into more than a dozen languages, and he maintains a private practice in NYC dedicated to honoring the centrality of sexuality in his patients' lives. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 07:32 How psychological arousal relates to sexual intimacy 08:28 Why couples in long term relationships often develop a 'sex script' over time 12:51 Recognition that psychological arousal is a key component of sexual satisfaction 14:06 Why anticipation is an integral part of psychological excitement and how tapping into our erotic imaginations and fantasies helps get us going 18:42 Reciprocity is elemental for our sense of bonding, particularly when we're talking about intimacy and the vulnerability around reaching that authentic sexual place 26:06 The element of play and being able to express sexual fantasy in recreating your sexual script 32:37 How to move from the shallow end in these conversations about sexual fantasy and drift further in so that we don't get fearful and anxious about the process of connecting sexually 35:57 Dr. Kerner's tips to help someone safely explore to open up more capacity and let go of their sexual rigidity 37:44 Introducing the idea of sexual exploration without pressure 41:50 Shifting from intercourse to outercourse and creating a sex script that adds and rearranges the right elements for us as a couple 43:15 How to find out more about Dr. Ian Kerner and get ahold of his latest book So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare and Learning to Repair Our Love Lives Mentioned So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare and Learning to Repair Our Love Lives (*Amazon Link) She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman (*Amazon Link) Connect with Dr. Ian Kerner Website: iankerner.com Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

On today's episode of The Empowered Relationship Podcast, you'll hear Dr. Betty Martin really inviting the practice of slowing down and exploring not only our partner's needs, but equally as importantly, our own needs. We discuss how her work as a sex educator and her exploration of somatic-based therapy inspired her to create her Wheel of Consent framework, which illustrates that when we're sexual, we move between four different zones. Dr. Betty will step us through the four zones of the wheel and gives examples to illustrate the practice of taking turns giving and receiving pleasure. She shares her insights into negotiating boundaries and sets the stage for having a productive conversation about your needs with your partner. Dr. Betty also explores why we start your experience outside the bedroom fully clothed rather than with genital touch and describes where to find additional resources that will help us open the gateway to emotional and spiritual fluency. Dr. Betty Martin has been working with people professionally for over 40 years. She was a Chiropractor for 30 years and upon retiring from that practice, became a certified Surrogate Partner, Sacred Intimate, and Somatic Sex Educator. Her explorations in somatic-based therapy and practices informed her creation of the framework, The Wheel of Consent®. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 08:16 The framework of the Wheel of Consent and what got Dr. Betty interested in creating it 13:45 The practice of taking turns and respecting boundaries and how that helps you understand your own physical needs 16:22 Why it's so uncommon for couples to be connected into different roles and often forget to be explicit about wanting to make love 18:00 Tips on using the Wheel of Consent and laying the groundwork for giving your partner the gift of touch with a full heart 20:58 Unlike your regular sexual play, you should take time to negotiate what you need and incorporate pauses to ensure everyone is comfortable 22:16 This is a practice that you keep coming back to it over and over, but you start on the couch and don't include genital touch until you played it 20 or 30 times, or you'll get right back into the same habits that produced the same results before 24:06 Why saying no allows you to say yes 33:41 Dr. Betty explains things that see people typically work through that gives them some insight into current challenges 37:25 The model allows people to come in contact with their guilt and fear of rejection — Dr. Betty describes what she recommends for people as they confront their somatic pain 39:29 What you expect as an outcome of fully engaging with the Wheel of Consent process Mentioned Dr. Betty Martin Website Dr. Betty Martin Instagram The Wheel of Consent Instagram Body Electric School The 3-Minute Game by Harry Faddis The Art of Receiving and Giving: The Wheel of Consent by Dr. Betty Martin, with Robyn Dalzen * Amazon Link Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

On today's episode of The Empowered Relationship Podcast, my guest, a neuroscientist known only as Dr. L, joins the show to support us in understanding limerence, what it is and how to negotiate the experience. He describes how his motivation for starting his blog and online community was rooted in his own unexpected experience of limerence after a long period of contented life as a husband. Dr. L shares his fascination with the underlying neuroscience behind limerence and his hopes that he can support other people to make sense of their experience of limerence from that perspective. Dr. L gives us his one-sentence working definition of what exactly limerence is and how it differs from a crush. Limerence is linked with big swings in mood, where an individual moves rapidly between a sense of euphoria and deep lows, depending on how they currently perceive their relationship with the other person. We also dive into what type of person may be more prone to unrequited love and the three elements that have to be present to go from being attracted to another person to being limerent for them. This week's guest expert, Dr. L, blogs on his site Living with Limerence under a pseudonym so he can be fearlessly frank. In his everyday life, Dr. L is a neuroscientist passionate about helping people understand what's going on in their traitor brains and reprogram themselves into leading more purposeful lives. He wants to explain what limerence is, how it affects us psychologically and emotionally, and how to devise practical ways to master it and integrate it into life in a healthier way. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 05:16 Dr. L's personal experience of limerance and why he was inspired to start his blog 08:04 A working definition of limerance 14:40 The difference between a crush or the beginning of a romantic relationship and limerence 17:44 Why a distinguishing factor of limerance is the ability to function, socialize, or really engage in all the activities of a thriving life 19:29 The three elements that must be present to go from being attracted to another person to being limerent for them 23:31 The glimmer and hope, and then the uncertainty — and why that intermittent reinforcement makes you feel as if you're addicted to someone 28:32 The characteristics of people who are a little bit more susceptible to limerance and the extra insight provided by the Myers Briggs type indicator 35:17 Why the relationship between limerence and attachment is so complex 42:53 The benign neglect that often happens in a marriage and why limerence can be the result of an unconscious feeling that something is missing in your marriage or partnership 45:58 Dr. L's recommendations for people in limerence and how you can give yourself the empowerment of converting your rich inner world to something healthy and beneficial Mentioned Love and Limerence: The Experience Of Being In Love book by Dorothy Tennov *Amazon Link Living with Limerence: A Guide for the Smitten book by Dr L *Amazon Link NeuroSparkle blog Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

On today's episode of The Empowered Relationship Podcast, I welcome Dr. Jeanne Michele, who gives her valuable insights into strengthening a relationship after an affair. We discuss the landscape of long-term intimacy, why the challenges we face can help us discover opportunities for personal and relational growth, and how we engage and co-create with our significant other in that relationship growth. Dr. Jeanne shares her experience of where disconnect can occur in relationships when we withhold our feelings and how we can avoid getting to that stage with our partner. We dive into what kind of changes people can make in their relationships to rebuild trust after infidelity and how to initiate courageous conversations to create positive impact. Opening ourselves up emotionally can make us feel vulnerable, but it is vital to move past hurt and pain into a connected future. Dr. Jeanne Michele designs and delivers personalized programs to men, women, and couples to help them create lives, relationships, and business partnerships that thrive. She is passionate about helping people create extraordinary relationships and lives. Her work immediately addresses crises, such as infidelity, grief, and lack of life direction, as well as the day-to-day challenges faced by couples and individuals seeking love, recovering from heartache, and those seeking greater clarity in their home and business lives. Individuals and couples experiencing a love or identity crisis find that working with Dr. Jeanne provides immediate relief and gives them the tools to create lasting change. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 06:52 What made Dr. Jeanne turn towards the issue and challenge of infidelity in relationships 09:52 What rebuilding trust and forging new connections can look like after infidelity — and how having those courageous conversations can be challenging after deal-breaker situations 12:11 Shining a light on a deficiency or discontent in a relationship can expose issues that need to be addressed and explored. 14:45 The three fundamental needs that should be fulfilled in a relationship 18:03 Why it's helpful to highlight the masculine dynamic and historical development when discussing the underlying causes of emotional connections or affairs outside the primary bond 31:07 Understanding the feminine need to be seen and to be validated and the inner conflict that comes when boundaries are crossed 34:39 Dr. Jeannie gives her tips on specific language to use when starting a courageous conversation about potential infidelity with a partner and why having those conversations can have a long term beneficial impact 37:46 Why baring yourself honestly and authentically helps you to connect with your spouse 41:15 Why courageous conversations and even relational-emotional hygiene help build trust in a relationship 44:43 How Dr. Jeanne supports couples to do the repair work and navigate the journey of recovering from an injury like infidelity 48:45 How to connect with Dr. Jeanne Michele and download her free ebook Mentioned Helping Couples Heal Website Helping Couples Heal Podcast Living & Loving Courageously Website Dr Dan Siegel's Website Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

As a practitioner, Varvara originally trained in psychotherapy and spiritual development. Because of her personal journey, she later found out that our fear of relating doesn't necessarily come from our brain, but from our body and the lack of safety we experienced as an infant. This is where her passion for somatic teaching comes from. Varvara joins us in today's episode to explain how developmental trauma can limit intimacy and connection in adult partnership, how our implicit memories can create conflict in our relationships, and how healing can help us take responsibility for our experience and reach out to our partner for support. Varvara Erochina is a somatic teacher and coach dedicated to personal and collective healing. She offers a multi-disciplinary approach to healing, informed by trauma resolution, Gestalt psychotherapy, spirituality, and life coaching. Her popular course 'How to Feel' offers practical education and embodied practice for feeling your feelings. She is the creator of Cards for Self-Care and offers 1-1 and group coaching, workshops, retreats, classes, and more. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 04:35 The lived experience of each individual comes from the very first relationships we form with ourselves and our caregivers when we were born. It also goes back to how that relationship is built upon memories that form in the body as we grow. 13:51 Talking about trauma can scare and put so many of us into defense. However, it's essential to recognize trauma as a chronic experience of not having our needs met as an infant. 15:44 The habits of blaming our partners or shutting ourselves off emotionally are the wise survival mechanisms we unconsciously developed as infants. Reclaiming those habits as such will help us move into greater self-connectedness. 21:03 Implicit memories, which is a formal term for feeling memories, are the thought patterns developed in response to a feeling we couldn't process as an infant. 23:18 Corrective experience happens when a new neural pathway gets created. This neural pathway gets deepened when we're being honest about how we feel, and when we experience appropriate co-regulation and safe attachment. 27:02 Corrective experience is also one of the best ways to experience a newfound safety, freedom, and possibility in our relationships. In order to access this, we must start by acknowledging our feeling of shame, understanding why it has developed in our younger years, and naming its impact by knowing whether it works in our relational life. 33:20 Whether or not our partner is ready to work with the process, we should always start with ourselves; then we go on and take that as far as we want in our relationship. 37:26 Babies experience chronic stress responses when parents appear frightened or frightening to them. If we have this kind of parenting, our infant implicit memory gets activated when we experience ourselves or our partners being frightened or frightening. Therefore, it's incredibly important to use our sensation and non-verbal clues at that moment to notice and differentiate between our adult selves and that very young response. 42:31 How to get in touch with Varvara Mentioned Be With website Varvara Erochina Instagram Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

A narcissistic personality operates in a way that drains its partner's emotional, mental, or financial health. During the course of this toxic and abusive relationship, the victim would voluntarily give up their sense of self and boundaries. They would've even gone into the state of cognitive dissonance by not actively recognizing their own values in the hopes of pleasing somebody else. After 16 years of living as a victim of narcissistic abuse, Triptta realized only she could change her situation. She went on doing recovery work to regain that sense of self and rediscover her personal boundaries. Although it's difficult to go through the healing process, she believes that doing so opens opportunities for a better, healthier partnership and parenthood. Triptta Neb Butkovich is the founder of DesignYou, a company that helps you discover how to take back your power and learn to love yourself again. Her mission is to provide a safe and open environment for victims of narcissistic and emotional abuse, to help them learn to value themselves and begin to enjoy healthy relationships again. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 08:32 Unlike those with narcissistic personality disorder, people with narcissistic tendencies can connect with others emotionally. 11:56 A narcissist's survival lies in their way of being. They use their relationships as "supplies" to feel better about themselves. 16:49 Narcissists typically don't change. While it's possible to empathize and sympathize with them, the partner should look into building their own sense of self and setting boundaries in their relationship. 21:14 How Triptta goes about building her sense of self after being abused for so long 24:59 The need to dissolve the relationship depends on whether or not someone has the disorder. Although this doesn't apply to those with narcissistic tendencies, their partner has yet to do some inner processing by reflecting on the following questions: Who am I today? What are my values today? What are the boundaries that I've given up for myself? 29:54 The healing journey using a multi-layered, three-pronged approach on the body, mind, and soul 33:33 How practicing your personal boundaries and decision making aligns with your values and legacy statement 36:24 How to get in touch with Triptta 39:15 Self-healing or doing the recovery work gives an ability to co-create healing with a partner and creates a ripple effect by being an inspiration to children or the community Mentioned DesignYou website ERP 226: How To Understand and Deal With a Narcissist – An Interview With Wendy Behary ERP 180: What If I Think My Partner Has a Personality Disorder? An Interview With Gabrielle Usatynski ERP 162: How To Know If You Are With a Narcissist and What To Do About It – Dr. Lisa Firestone Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Contrary to the other five, the love language of personal space isn't expressed in an active manner, but rather it's being intentional, supportive, and respectful with one another. It gives someone permission to spend time reflecting, contemplating, and doing other inner processes. While it's romantic to have connection and engagement in a relationship, it's also true that couples who are deeply committed in their relationship need space and time apart. However, putting this idea into practice brings up fear and insecurity sometimes. Today's episode is the continuation of How to Use the 6th Love Language in Your Relationship, discussing what hinders a couple's ability to give and/or receive space and solitude, what expectations to consider in order to devise a compromise acceptable to both sides, how to assess our need for space, and finally, how to practice the 6th love language in your relationship in conscious and proactive ways. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 07:40 The gift of personal space and solitude is presumed by many as the 6th love language. This act of love and care is particularly helpful to introverts, highly-sensitive, and artistic people. 09:48 Practicing this love language helps empaths achieve clarity on things they've been contemplating about. This is supported by a research study on liminal space where some of the best inventions, equations, and ideas are said to be coming from. 13:55 Modern living as well as changes in our relationship norms and stereotypical roles make it difficult for us to get a true sense of space. This could especially be true for people who are living in close quarters, people sheltered in place during the time of the pandemic, and individuals who can hardly differentiate time for self-care, romance, work, and domestic responsibility. 18:26 Inquiring about your partner's expectations is a helpful starting place to begin the conversation. From here, you can start to work together to achieve a win-win solution. One method is to take into account our family background, what we're used to, and how our sense of culture was negotiating time and space. 20:06 Reflecting on the following areas can also help inform your expectations in partnership: Do you depend on your partner to fulfill many of your needs? How are you with self-care? Are you honest about your needs? Do you take comfort in being alone? 24:22 When inquiring about your partner's expectations, you may also want to consider the levels of attention, engagement, and communication that each of you is willing to give and/or receive. 28:28 A guide to knowing our need for space 32:10 The gift of space and distance are shown in various forms, for example: being supportive of your partner's endeavor, allowing your partner to enjoy their moments with friends, encouraging them to pursue their commitments, and being respectful with their hobbies 38:20 How to honor the 6th love language in your relationship Mentioned Life on Purpose: How Living for What Matters Most Changes Everything by Victor J Strecher (*Amazon Link) A Guide to Speaking the 6th Love Language article by Pedram Shojai ERP 281: How To Use The 6th Love Language In Your Relationship – Part 1 ERP 110: How To Manage Two Majorly Conflicting Needs In Relationship ERP 238: How To Find Your Emotional Balance In Relationship Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Knowing your partner's love language can offer positive outcomes in your relationship. The five love languages describe the different ways that romantic partners express and experience love. Oftentimes, the act of love that we're willing to give is connected with our dominant language. Although it's strenuous to match your partner's especially in the early stages of your relationship, it can be achieved with practice and commitment to the process. The practice of the 6th love language in your relationship is also pivotal to you and your partner's optimal living and real functioning. Taking time for one's self or self-care should not be viewed as a partial or total absence of engagement in the relationship. Here's why. Today's episode discusses how you can apply and cultivate the benefits of the 6th love language in your relationship to be more present, more available, and have more opportunities to engage in an authentic relationship with your partner. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 04:19 Gary Chapman's five love languages — words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, gifts — neatly package an individual's preferred care style. Everyone has a primary love language that's related to what they hope to receive from their partner. 11:03 The 6th love language — space — is an act of deep love and care where you give/ask your partner for space. This sense of space or solitude may come in the forms of physical or relational distance where a person takes time to contemplate, process, and feel one's own truth. 12:47 Introverts and highly sensitive people value this love language more than others due to their absorbing nature. This allows them time to reflect, process, and be comfortable in their own company. 18:18 Emotional disconnect in relationships occurs when someone has mistakenly picked up on their partner's non-verbal cues. To counteract this, revealing conversations that aim to articulate or educate both sides' wants are necessary. 23:41 In times of conflict, men may benefit more from the 6th love language as they need a moment to breathe and process things before actively engaging with their partner. However, the difference in gender lies in the ability to name and articulate the concern. 28:53 On Jessica's personal relationship: How the practice of revealing conversations and the 6th love language have sustained their healthy marriage Mentioned The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman (*Amazon Link) The "Are You A Highly Sensitive Person" Test by Elaine Aron 17 Traits of Highly Sensitivity People Article ERP 134: Sensitivity and Intimacy with Candy Crawford ERP 273: How to Handle the Concern of Vulnerability Not Working in Relationship Grief Refuge app Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

The natural fear we feel when showing vulnerability is tied to our survival instinct. However, this fear can affect intimacy in our relationships. Working through the specific moments in our past which triggered this fear is a painful but rewarding process, and can allow us to grow and foster more intimate relationships. The causes of our fears account for many factors including cultural and intergenerational trauma. Therefore, the most important elements to foster healing are open communication and creating a safe space to be vulnerable. Mitchell Smolkin is a certified emotionally-focused couples therapist (EFT), Jungian psychoanalyst, published author, experienced public speaker, and the host of "The Dignity of Suffering Podcast." He explains what we should expect around vulnerability in relationships & why it matters. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 03:56 Introduction to Mitchell and EFT 07:24 Vulnerability in relationship is a particular skill that is practiced over a lifetime. 11:11 Cultural and intergenerational history are important contexts in the process of healing. 18:42 Vulnerability as a relational phenomena. Notice your first reactions to disconnection, name them, to track where the upset originates. 25:28 Hiding what you are feeling can't overwrite the nervous system. We have mirror neurons that actually anticipate partner's responses. 29:07 Just allowing another person can establish safety. However, being anti-social is tied to survival but this is terrible for intimacy. 35:26 How to discern between vulnerability and being afraid. Just talking about it with a professional creates the safety to get out of your cycles of fear. 44:01 Meaningful conversations need to happen in the right environments, as well as the right frames of mind. Partners are continuously learning how to make each other safe. 48:12 Connect with Mitchell Mentioned Mitchell Smolkin Website Mitchell Smolkin Instagram The Dignity of Suffering Podcast Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Every single person needs secure relationships. While this is true for everyone, finding it is not always the simplest process—and here is where extended family comes in. Tracy McMillan, a television writer, relationship expert, and author joins the show to discuss how relationship problems almost always have roots in the family. Tracy's own show called "Family or Fiance" fosters the healing of relationships by addressing generational trauma. She finds that partners in relationship come out of the show feeling liberated when they experience breakthroughs with their families. Tracy is an accomplished author whose works include Mad Men, Good Girls Revolt, Marvel's Runaways, and United States of Tara. She has written three books including a relationship book called Why You're Not Married… Yet and a memoir called I Love You and I'm Leaving You Anyway. Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode: 03:47 Introduction to Tracy and her unique voice as a relationship expert 12:33 Spirituality helps create secure attachment. This is a human need regardless of sex or gender. 14:07 Relationships as needs: Now less about survival and more about self-actualization. 19:25 Healing a relationship is healing generational trauma. Breakthroughs can happen in an instant and all it takes is honesty to oneself. 25:15 Creating visibility and normalizing therapy is the main goal of Family or Fiance. It helps change the narrative in communities that do not believe in therapy. 29:10 Families find unity and common ground with their experience on Family or Fiance. 32:49 How to connect with Tracy Mentioned I Love You and I'm Leaving You Anyway: A Memoir Why You're Not Married . . . Yet: The Straight Talk You Need to Get the Relationship You Deserve Tracy McMillan Facebook Tracy McMillan Twitter Tracy McMillan Instagram Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins Twitter: @DrJessHiggins Website: drjessicahiggins.com Email: [email protected] If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.