Bananas - Funny news from around the world with Scotty Landes and Kurt Braunohler

Kurt and Scotty read your confessions about how John Mulaney made someone realize they are bi, hooking up with a friend’s ex-boyfriends, scratching a boss’s car, reporting a friend for copyright infringement and putting hot sauce in a roommates lotion! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from Minneapolis! Kurt and Scotty talk about a goat that loves punk rock, a woman charged $8k after rental car company claimed she drove 3x the circumference of the earth, an ice age bison and a man surviving at sea by holding on to soccer ball! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's another Bananas After Dark with Lauren Cook! Lauren joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a man who took 40,000 ecstasy pills over 9 years, a husband’s strange reaction to his sister in law’s pregnancy announcement, a man catfishing a police officer and convincing him to hand over his patrol car, a Mickey Mouse statue with lobster claws and man who had to have his testicles removed after they were making a hissing noise! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener confessions about making out with a guy with a short tongue, pretending to be a secret admirer to get back at a friend and breaking a friend’s ceramics projects in class! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Allison Miller (A Million Little Things) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a man who ate 40 chickens in 40 days, a Blockbuster themed bar, a school bus driver who took kids to Connecticut instead of Rhode Island, the young scientist award, a man who figured out how many cans of Spaghetti-o’s is needed to write Lord of the Rings! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Danielle Henderson returns to Bananas! She chats with Kurt and Scotty about a 33 mile road being stolen, armpit sex at BYU, a man driving into Japan’s oldest toilet and a bag-gate scandal in cornhole! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener confessions about making a friend sleep outside when there wasn’t enough room in car and buying a puzzle from charity shop that didn’t have enough pieces and still gifting it! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Atsuko Okatsuka returns to the Bananas podcast to talk with Kurt and Scotty about history’s original Florida man, a woman suing Velveeta, a man who was fired for not being fun at work and brothers running for mayor against each other! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about a lyrebird that mimics the evacuation sound at zoo, the Texas couple who thinks house is haunted by sexual ghosts, a water slide catching on fire, the first Filipino to visit every country in the world and an attorney who fought helmet laws dies in motorcycle crash while not wearing helmet! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener confessions about not knowing the Pacific Ocean has salt in it, copying a friend's art project and winning an award, throwing a dead turtle out the car window, scamming neighbors into giving money for Model UN and being a below average taster! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Chloe Radcliffe (comedian) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a man painting a beaver with his tongue, Wendy’s workers messing with railroad tracks to slow down business, scientists trying to teach robots to laugh at the right time and a person throwing a steak out the window at a dinner party! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Georgia Hardstark returns to the Bananas podcast! She joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about the fake Mr. Bean that caused a rift between Pakistan and Zimbabwe, a woman stopped in airport security while wearing a butt-plug containing her boyfriend’s ashes, a person who purchased a wild owl at a gas station and how Justin Bieber is afraid of Judge Judy! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener stories and confessions about protesting to allow smoking in the library in college and eating the top off a baguette at the store! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Cristen Conger (Unladylike podcast) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about bratwurst-gate, an online post to trade parrot for Vespa, Irish dance cheating allegations and a customer suing Barilla pasta! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about a babysitter who accidentally took two year old neighbor on vacation, a pregnant firefighter that helped car crash victim before giving birth, drama with fat bear week and cans of urine being sold outside Tate Museum! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your stories and confessions about a brother who was low on potassium, blaming bad farts on boyfriend, sharting while hiding and accidentally tagging yourself on someones social posts! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from Asbury Park! Kurt and Scotty talk about dolphins recognizing friends by tasting their piss, a naked couple having oral sex and crashed into a FedEx truck, the Japanese titles for the Fast and Furious movies and a Welsh man drinking in 56 pubs in 24 hours! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Steph Tolev joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about an orchestra audience waking up screaming, King Charles hiring a piper to wake him up everyday, a food delivery robot rolling through crime scene and baby puffins being thrown off cliffs in Iceland! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your stories and confessions about responding to free pearl necklace ad on Craigslist, a typo in a breakup past, getting revenge on cheating a boyfriend and being in a cab that hit a mystery substance! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Alison Rosen returns to the podcast to talk with Kurt and Scotty about how dudes only play heavy metal to impress other dudes, police being called for screaming only to find a man working out, a pumpkin spice engagement ring and snack chips that are supposed to help millennials get laid! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty tell stories about an alarm clock ringing inside a wall for 19 years, a woman having the last laugh at her own funeral, a table of restaurant patrons that made the waiter question reality and a runaway chimpanzee in Ukraine! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your confessions about throwing fake bachelorette parties and sneaking into friend's house with strict parents home! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Lili Trifilio of Beach Bunny joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about an 81 year old man selling his prairie dog vacuuming business, a wedding invitation that accidentally sent guests to a porn site and man who won a lying down competition! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kristen Meinzer (podcaster, author) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about officials asking people to stay away from horny manatees, a woman who swallowed an AirPod and recorded sound from inside her stomach, the attempted murder of the Tualatin chub shrub, a man who got trapped in hydrogen balloon while trying to collect pine nuts and the greatest footballer names of all time! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty ready your confessions about giving pizza to random guy on street for weeks and a hand job gone wrong! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Lizzy Cooperman (comedian, Lizzy Cooperman's In Your Hands podcast) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about when the Price is Right gave elephants as prizes, a nationwide competition to boost alcohol consumption in Japan, a pony mayor getting barred from local bar and a couple arrested for having sex on Cedar Point ferris wheel! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mo Welch (comedian, artist) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about AI writing news articles, strange name associations, a snake that bites a 2 year old girl who then bites the snake back and how people on average tell 4 lies a day! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your confessions about not using a gifted telescope out of fear of seeing an alien, lying to parents about summer school, lying to parents about sleeping at a friends house and being afraid of butterflies! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty tell stories about a Chilean man who is accidentally paid 286% his normal salary resigns and disappears, a man forced to use a British accident to navigate his rental car, the Domino’s Pizza wedding registry and a man waking up in sleeper train to find it never left station! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from LA! Cristela Alonzo joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about scientists milking mice, a man who hasn’t stopped farting since eating ham roll, a family fearing for their safety after being targeted by seagulls and a quarterback who eats bananas with peels on and drinks coffee with mayonnaise! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your stories and learning ASL and lying to parents about being hit by a car! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about why humans are the only animals with chins, calling a girlfriend Tony Pizza, the dog lawyer, making $100k to be candy taste tester and Tom Cruise’s stolen luggage! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jackie Fabulous (@jackiefabulous) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a skydiver that was saved by fire ants, a man who thought he was constipated but actually had water bottle up his butt, coconut water being needed for pig insemination and cannabis fed chickens! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about lying roommates and more! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from Brooklyn, NY! Kurt and Scotty talk about a man falling into Mount Vesuvius while trying to take a selfie, why Cheetos are banned in Germany, a message in bottle seeking a boyfriend, the medical reason you might have to put sugar on your butthole and a shirtless drunk man arrested while shoveling pasta into his mouth! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Marshall (You're Wrong About podcast) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about breathing through your butthole, a Japanese worker that lost a USB stick with the entire city’s data on it, a sentient AI that hired an attorney and a man who called the police to see if he was ripped off buying meth! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener confessions and stories about peeing in the ocean and algae starting to glow, having sex on ski gondola and locking eyes with a random person, a cat that ruins a carpet when owner has sex and pretending to be allergic to things! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about how balancing on one foot can tell you whether you will live or die, a woman who won every category at county fair but no one can find her and police pulling a python out of man’s pants after he was arrested for fighting! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

V Spehar (@underthedesknews) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about how people like other people who smell like them, a guy that spent over $8.5k a year on Pepsi, a man who is going to push peanut up a mountain with his nose and the world’s most expensive bath! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read confessions about Read matching with someone you already hooked up with and falling on a hike on a date! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about turning celebrities into lab grown salami, how drinking coffee before shopping can make you spend more money, an update on Jonathan the oldest tortoise to have ever lived, a family who’s roof was removed by contractor they didn’t hire and an update on the woman who sued Geico for getting STD while having sex in a car! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from Denver! Kurt and Scotty talk about a scientist that accidentally made a vicious mutant attack hamster, Disney ruining a proposal, the Arizona penis man and a fish that jumped into a man’s mouth and throat and lodged itself there! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read your stories and confessions about vets finding underwear in dogs stomachs that reveals affairs, hiding a burger from wife so she wouldn’t eat it and never paying taxes! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Courtney Pauroso joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a rodent that disintegrates from having too much sex, a stag party that got stranded in Amsterdam, a rabbit that climbs mountains and sexy talking trash cans in Sweden! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mitra Jouhari (Three Busy Debras, Big Mouth) joins Kurt and Scotty to talk about a woman who tried her first real meal after eating nothing but potato chips for 23 years, a bartender who found an ATM glitch and blew $1.6 million, an update on the people who changed their name to Salmon for free sushi and the story of Staff Sergeant Reckless! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read a listener about their mom's eventful trip to the zoo as a child! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas After Dark! Kurt and Scotty talks about a Korean kid's game called Poop Needle, a man who stole a lawn mover and cut the victim’s grass, nuking the moon and a woman who gave birth at a Metallica concert! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's Bananas live from Vancouver, Canada! Kurt and Scotty talk about a woman that brought a wild bobcat into her house, how a falling meatball caused a student to fail a test, a Spanish driver that ate hash cakes and a woman who had a drinking glass in her bladder for 4 years! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty read listener confessions about peeing in sibling's beds while they slept, hanging up the phone while dad was trying to book a hotel and a man that fell off a cruise ship. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kurt and Scotty talk about a toilet that turns human feces into crypto, the 13 most fascinating festivals, a senior citizen that stole a jacket from an art museum, a McDonalds customer that was fined for eating his food at Starbucks and how Walden Pond is being killed by urine! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.