The Porn Addict's Wife

How do you believe something you've never believed before? How do you change what you believe? And why bother? Why is it so important to do it? Today I am diving into a concept I am teaching at the in person retreat in October and it has changed my life. Want to believe you can trust your husband? Want to believe you can lose weight? Want to believe you are a good mom? Want to believe you are good enough? This is for you.

Do you ever have a gut feeling that something is off? Do you have intuition that he's hiding something or that he's relapsed and not telling you? Today I am diving into what intuition is, why we feel it, and what to do about it. This is a good one ladies! Come to my Free webinar next week! "How To Talk To Your Husband About His Pornography Problem" Free Webinar and Communication Workshop Monday, September 25-Wednesday, September 27 @ 11am est

In this episode I am so excited to be talking to my client Ghazal about her story! She is so powerful and one of the things I admire most about her is her willingness to look inward and her courage to take action even when it scares her. I know you will find inspiration from her story!

Do you ever feel like you don't love him like you used to? Like the things he's done have changed it so it's not possible to feel the way you used to feel about him? Today I'm diving into why this happens, how to change it if you want to, and what it means if you don't.

In this episode, my client Shawnie is talking about her story! She joined coaching about one year ago and she came to the in person retreat last year as the youngest client there :) She is being open and vulnerable and I hope y'all find hope in her strength and story! Thank you Shawnie!

Do you feel unsafe during physical intimacy with your spouse? Today I am going to talk about why that is and give you some ideas of what you can do to help you work through it. The main thing I want you to know is that however you feel is ok. It's normal. And you don't need to judge yourself for it.

First time ever my twin sister Kristi came on the podcast! She joined me today to talk about her experience going to the in person retreat in Nashville last year so listen in to hear what it was like from her perspective. Bonus-at the end you'll hear some of our answers to common "twin" questions we get! Ready to reserve your spot at this year's in person retreat? Sign up today!

That's right. I'm closing the doors to coaching. Listen in to find out why and what that means for you. Ready to join before the doors close? Click here to sign up now!

Rob joined me on the podcast today to talk about what we've been working through the last 9 months. And one of those is attraction. In this episode we are diving into what he learned about attraction to other women, how our society perpetuates beliefs that aren't true, and how to work through attraction in your marriage. I hope you find this episode helpful in moving forward!

Have you ever wondered this? When is enough, enough? How much of this should I take? When should I leave? Is there a certain time when we should separate? Today I am diving into this question and I hope that even if you've never thought this you take a listen. I'm bringing back Coach Week! Come try out coaching for free next week and get personal help from me with whatever you are going through. Details will be up on the website today so be sure to check it out and watch for emails letting you know when you can sign up!

How much should I know? What questions should I ask? Are there certain details I need to be made aware of? Today I am going to dive into this topic - and probably not in the way you expect! Win a spot at my retreat! I am giving away a spot at my retreat and you could win it! To be eligible make sure you sign up and secure your spot before August 20 and then I will be refunding the full price to one lucky sign up! Click here for details and to sign up today! My program is $1k off until August 20! Simply sign up for my lifetime coaching program and select the pay in full option at checkout! The discount is already applied so you can simply sign up and you're in! Click here to join today!

Our energy follows out attention. And where we put our energy is where change happens. So it begs the question, where are we putting our attention? Today I am going to take you through a process to figure out where you are putting your physical and emotional energy so that you can change it if you want to.

Do you want him to reassure you that you are moving forward? Or that he finds you attractive? or that he's working on his addiction? If you are seeking reassurance from him, this is for you. I'm going to teach you what reassurance is, why you want it, and how to get it for good. Enjoy!

External validation feels great. We all like to hear it, right? Today I am going to talk about what it really is and why we like it and how it can be a problem.

Coping mechanisms seem great, right? After all, they help us deal with stress. Today I'm going to dive into why coping mechanisms can be a problem and give you an alternative to that that's even better.

Do you feel like you're waiting for something bad to happen? Like you can never fully relax because you don't know if he'll relapse again? In this episode I'm discussing why our brains operate this way and how to start changing it! Join my next free coaching call! Come try out coaching on Wednesday, July 18 @ 11am est! Click here for details!

How do you stop being controlled by others or your life circumstance? How do you become emotionally independent rather than feeling like your emotional state is dependent on your husband's behavior or pornography problem? Today I'm going to give a few ideas from our Founding Fathers and the early American army to answer that question. Happy Independence Day everyone!

I had no idea what a life coach was when I signed up for life coach training. I just knew it helped me and I wanted more of it. Today I am going to tell you what a life coach does, what my job is and how it can help you. I hope this helps you decide if this is what you are looking for! If you want more information on how to work with me, head to my website!

This is for the hard days. The days you don't want to get out of bed or you feel like you'll burst into tears at a moment's notice. That's exactly where I am today. So I'm going to share a few tips or tools on what you can do on those days to help you through them. The last one is the most important. :) I love you ladies.

This is a great question! Today I am going to dive into whether or not it's a good idea to have your husband tell you when he messes up (and how that's different from an accountability partner). I'm also going to dive into why it can be so hard to have him tell you and what to do about it.

Are you worried about going to the beach with your husband? Or his work party? Or going out to dinner and running into an attractive waitress? Today I am going to talk about the biggest mistakes we make in triggering situations and my tips on what to do instead. Want more on triggers? Check out Episode 112: Triggers and Bonus: Conversations with Rob: Triggers and Temptations.

Are there areas in your relationship where you just want him to reassure you? Maybe it's that you can trust him? Or that he actually finds you attractive? Today I am going to talk about what it really means to want reassurance and why it's not actually possible the way we think it is. Come coach with me for free! Join me on Wednesday, May 31 at 11am for a free coaching call! It's like a "try it before you buy it" call for anyone who wants coaching! Click here for details! Want to coach with me one on one? I am opening up 5 private coaching spots this summer only and it won't be an offer I open up again! Want to chat about it to see if it's right for you? Email me at [email protected] and we will set it up!

I am so excited to announce that I am opening 5 private coaching spots this summer! If you want to work with me but want a personal coaching experience, this is for you! This is a limited time offer that expires on June 1 so sign up today by clicking here! Select the payment option for the Private Coaching plan that works best for you to secure your spot today. I cannot wait to work with you!

Today is a very special episode with guest host Rob! This is a solo episode where he is discussing how pornorgraphy affects your brain and ultimately affects your relationships and your life. If you like this one, go give him some love and support by leaving a podcast review on iTunes! He'd love to know you appreciate his honesty!

Did you just find out your husband is addicted to porn? Or maybe you just found out about a relapse or a detail you didn't know before. This episode is for you. Today I am going through my biggest tips on what to do next that will help you start healing right away. I'm also listing some additional podcast episodes that might help!

Want this to be the best Mother's Day yet? I have a few ideas on how to make that happen. Listen in as I give 4 tips on how to get what you want this Mother's Day (or for anything you want in life!)

Have you ever thought something like, "I want to know he's as invested in this relationship as I am", or "I just want to know that he loves me as much as I love him" or "It's not fair that I'm putting in more work than he is"? That's what this episode is all about. WHY our brain does that and what it's actually trying to avoid. Plus, what happens when we do it and why it's so important to stop. Sign up today for my next FREE class! May 22 at 11am est I am hosting a free call "Finding Peace When Your Husband Is Untrustworthy". Click here to save your spot and get access to the live call and the replay! Struggling with your body image as you get ready for summer? Yeah. Join the club. Literally. This month inside my coaching progam I am teaching a brand new Master Class called "How To Not Hate Your Body". I am going to be teaching you how to actually change the way you FEEL about your body, not just give you pretty mantras to recite to try to fake it til you make it. If you are ready to completely change how you feel about your body, you can get access to this class by joining my lifetime coaching program today by clicking here. I'll see you there.

Ever find yourself feeling pain on behalf of your past self? Maybe you found out about something that happened in the past that you didn't know before and now you find yourself rewriting the memory in order to put in that new information? Today I'm going to talk about why our brain likes to do this and why it's so important to stop. Also, how to do it ;) Come join my free class! On May 22 @ 11am est I am teaching a class called "Finding Peace When Your Husband is Untrustworthy" and I'd love for you to come! All you have to do is register and you'll get access to the live call and the replay! Click here to join for free!

I am so excited to bring you a conversation with one of my clients-Gina! She has such an incredible, sweet spirit and I am so inspired and in awe of her courage! I hope she inspires you and you resonate with her story!

Did you know there are 2 definitions of the word "compromise"? Today I'm going to talk about both definitions and how they often show up in our marriage. The second defition will blow your mind!

How do you deal with the moments of acute pain? Like when you first find out about your husband's pornography problem or when he relapses? There are a few ways we typically respond that unintentionally make our lives more difficult. Today I'm going over what those are and how to avoid them.

What is a boundary? How do I know if it's "healthy"? What if someone is violating my boundary? Am I supposed to be feeling anything negative if I set one? Is it ok to set one to avoid negative emotion? I am answering all these questions and going through examples in this episode so tune in! If you want more help with boundaries and want more clarity around them, go check out The Porn Addict's Wife podcast episode 17: boundaries v consequences Want more one on one help setting boundaries? Come to my "How To Set Boundaries Workshop" next week! Come join me live for 4 days of coaching from April 17-20 all around boundaries and I'll teach you what they are and how to set them. I'd love to give you the one on one help you need for your situation so come join me by clicking here!

I am honored to introduce you to Allyson! She is one of my clients who wanted to share her story with you on the podcast! She is sharing her personal story, her biggest struggles, and the things that have helped her the most. I hope this helps you in your journey forward! Thank you Allyson for sharing your story!

Have you ever felt humiliated by your husband's actions? I have. And it inspired this episode today. I am diving into the difference between shame and humiliation, explaining the shame cycle and the humiliation cycle, and giving you the key to getting out of both! See the video of this episode on youtube by clicking here! Join me for "How to Set Boundaries Workshop"! This will be a week of coaching to help you learn what healthy boundaries are, how to set them, and how to do so in a way that makes you feel safe even if your husband is still watching porn. Register today for just $19 and join us April 17-20 @ 12pm est. See all details here!

What is the relationship between forgiveness and peace? And where does God fit into all of this? After all, we are commanded to forgive in the scriptures and God tells us He forgives us if we come to Him...so how does that all fit in? Today I'm sharing a few thoughts on the relationship between forgiveness and God and what it looks like to me. I hope you enjoy. If you want to join the How To Forgive Master Class, click here.

This has been too long in coming :) The first part of Monica's story can be found in between episodes 72 & 73. Start with that part of her story and finish with this! A huge thank you to her for being the most incredible client and willing to share her journey with all of you!

A few weeks ago on Instagram, I asked you if you wanted to forgive your husband. And the vast majority of you said yes. Then I asked you why you haven't yet. Today I am going to read your responses and go through them with you and offer why they are keeping you stuck. If you truly want to forgive your husband, I can teach you how. Sign up today to join my How To Forgive Master Class and get instant access to my lifetime coaching program.

How do you forgive yourself for a pornography addiction? How do you forgive your spouse for one? How do you move on past something without carrying the shame and guilt with you even if you know it was wrong? Rob joined me today to discuss this and it's an episode you won't want to miss!

How do you know if you are stuck in resentment and pain? How do you know if you are holding onto it and haven't let it go yet? What does it look like and why do we do it? Plus, how do we stop? Covering all of that and sharing SO many personal examples because I have done this so much in my life! If you want to forgive your husband but don't know how, I want to invite you to join my How To Forgive Master Class. This class will be taught live inside my coaching program starting March 27 so join today for lifetime access so you don't miss it! Sign up here!

Are you waiting for him to say sorry? Do you feel like you're stuck without closure because he hasn't acknowledged what he's done to you? Or maybe he has said sorry and you don't know why you aren't feeling any better about it? This is for you. Today I'm diving into why we want an apology and what happens if we don't get it. Join me for my "How To Forgive" Master Class this March! From March 27-30 I am launching a brand new class inside my coaching program and I want to work with you. If you've been struggling with forgiveness but really want to move on, this is for you! Come join my program today and let's go forward!

Do you have to forgive your husband for his pornography addiction? For the lying and the hurt and the pain? First off, let's dive into what forgiveness is and then we will answer this question. Other episodes of the podcast on forgiveness: Episode 53: Forgiveness Bonus Episode: My Journey of Forgiveness (after episode 24) Want to learn how to move forward and forgive your husband? Come join my new Master Class "How To Forgive" on March 27. This class will be taught inside my coaching program so come join us today for lifetime access and for one on one help moving forward and forgiving. I can't wait to see you there!

What is commitment? How commited are you to your healing? How do you know? And what do you do if you aren't as commited as you thought? Today I am sharing a few thoughts on commitment that I learned this week in my business mastermind and how I am applying them to help me be more commited to your emotional healing. Come join me and let's go forward!

Join me today to learn what true confidence really is. Spoiler alert: it's not what you think! Plus, learn about the difference between confidence and false confidence and how pride is related to all of it. Plus, I tell you the exact formula to follow to start increasing your confidence! You are in luck!! I have turned my "Confident Sexuality Master Class" into an evergreen course that you can now access by clicking here! SImply sign up and you will automatically have access to all the replays from this last week! Plus, you can now check out other courses that I over by clicking here!

We all feel insecure about some things. But our brain often takes it one step further and turns it into shame. In this episode I am going to go into what insecurity is, what shame is, how they are different, and how our brains often make our insecurities worse. Let's go deep on this one ladies! It's good!

Sometimes we don't give ourselves permission to feel emotions. Today, I am going over why we do this, what happens when we do it, and why it's so important to stop doing it. Your feelings are allowed. :) For more episodes on this topic, check out the Episode titled "Your Feelings Are Valid" and "Thoughts About Feelings". Come coach with me! I am coaching next week for 4 days and I would love to see you there! This will be a master class called Confident Sexuality where I will be teaching you how to overcome your physical insecurities and emotional guards so that you can show up to your intimate relationship with confidence. Sign up here today!

Insecurities are not personality traits that are unchangeable. They are a combination of thoughts and feelings that we can change. In our sexual relationship, there are 3 main areas where insecurities rise: physical insecurities, sexual insecurities, and insecurities around pornography. Today I am going to discuss what insecurites are, when they come up, the difference in these 3 areas, and how to change them for good. Come join me for my Confident Sexuality Master Class. Just in time for Valentine's Day, I am going to teach you how to conquer your physical insecurities and vulnerabilities so that you can finally begin feeling confident in your sexual relationship. Check out the details today and register so you don't miss it.

I just got an email from a sweet follower and I want to share it with you. If your husband is addicted to sex and you are struggling with how it's affecting you and your sex life, this is for you. I can help you. Come join me.

How often should you have sex with your husband? Should he initiate or should you? Do you find yourself cringing at anything ultra feminine because it reminds you of pornography so instead you put on a baggy t shirt and pretend you're asleep? Today I am diving into the thoughts that we have about sexuality and why it's so important to become aware of them and how they are affecting your sexual relationship wtih your husband. If your sexual relationship with your husband is not where you want it to be, I want to invite you to come join me for a special Master Class I am hosting in February all about Confident Sexuality. This class is from February 13-16 just in time to make sure you have an unforgettable Valentine's Day. Get all the details and sign up today here!

How do you actually hit the goals you keep setting every year? How do you actually lose that same 10 lbs that has been on your list forever? In this episode I am walking you through the steps that you need to take in order to hit your tangible goals-whether that's going back to school, starting a business, losing weight, or writing a book. Whatever your goal is, today I am going to teach you how to hit it. Want help working through your goal and making a plan to hit it? I'd love to help you! Come join me for my Resolutions Master Class! This class is just $19 and it's 4 days of teaching and coaching to give you the one on one help you need in order to figure out what you want to achieve, what's in your way, and how to overcome each obstacle to ensure that you finally get the goal you want! Class is January 23-26! Click here for full details and to register today!

Y'all ever known anybody who hoards things? Trinkets? Knick knacks? Furniture? Broken cars? Just in case they might need them later? Today I am going to introduce you to something I call emotional hoarding. Join me as I discuss what emotional hoarding is, why we do it, why we should stop, and what it could look like if we did. Come join me for my brand new Master Class: Resolutions from January 23-26! If you have some new year goals that you don't know how to hit or have something that you feel called to do but aren't sure how to get it done, I want to invite you to join me. In this class we are going to work through what you want and I am going to help you figure out exactly what's in your way and how to overcome it. Register today by clicking here.