The One You Feed | Personal Growth, Emotional Resilience & Purpose

Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. is the co-founder of the Center for Mindful Living in West Los Angeles and is the creator of the 6-month Coaching and Mentorship Program: A Course in Mindful Living. He's a psychologist and international speaker and mindfulness educator. He's written many books and in this episode, he and Eric discuss his book, Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self Compassion. There are so many practical approaches and new perspectives in this episode. We think you'll get a lot of useful information out of the conversation. Spiritual Habits connect you back to your deepest, truest self. Learn how to put personalized Spiritual Habits to work in your life in a special, one-time program with Eric and a small group of listeners. Learn more here: thespiritualhabit.com Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Elisha Goldstein and I Discuss… His book, Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self Compassion That what you practice and repeat is what you get Depression Triggers and Depression Cures Thoughts, Emotions, Sensations, and Behaviors The triangle of awareness Procedural memory The habit loop being like a traffic circle with 4 entry points The way our brain associates things The way our nervous system is overwhelmed when we’re experiencing depression Avoidance and depression How naming something gives us a little space and perspective How naming something actually changes the activity in our brain Perspective-making tools The way journaling objectifies your experiences Natural anti-depressants Mindfulness: a state of engaged curiosity Relating to your experience differently through mindfulness, self-compassion, play, compassion, purpose, and mastery The growth mindset and the fixed mindset Practicing being curious in your daily life to cultivate a growth mindset How a learning mindset is related to a growth mindset The importance of play How to discover what kind of play you might enjoy as an adult Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. Links: Mindful Living Collective Facebook Twitter YouTube Channel See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oren Jay Sofer leads retreats and workshops on mindful communication and meditation at retreat centers and educational facilities around the United States. He is the founder of Next Step Dharma and Mindful Healthcare and he holds a degree in Comparative Religion from Columbia University. In this episode, he and Eric discuss his new book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. In it, you’ll learn an updated model on how to skillfully communicate – especially in difficult situations. Practical strategies and helpful perspectives are what you’ll get in this episode. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. In This Interview, Oren Jay Sofer and I Discuss… His book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication That we’re not stuck, our minds can learn and it depends on the choices we make moment to moment The three steps to create effective conversation Lead with Presence Come from Curiosity and Care Focus on What Matters How most people live with fragmented attention and it takes training to be fully present with another person That you can feel whether a person is fully present with you or not Bringing awareness and attention to the body to come into the present moment (the body is always in the present moment) Bodily sensations happen in the present moment The power of pausing How our rate of speech is connected to our nervous system That when we are present, we have a lot more choices That our intention shapes our verbal and non-verbal communications The intention to understand The intention of kindness and care How you can practice kindness to someone you don’t like Kindness can be about protecting your own heart The phrase “Let me see if I’ve got it…” Listening for what matters to the other person – what do they need? The difference between needs and strategies The Nonviolent Communication Model Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests Communicating in the workplace Oren Jay Sofer Links OrenJaySofer.com Facebook Twitter Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Tererai Trent is an inspiring and dynamic scholar, educator, humanitarian, motivational speaker, author and the founder of Tererai International. Dr. Trent is one of the most internationally acclaimed voices for women's empowerment and quality education. Named by Oprah Winfrey as her all-time favorite guest, Dr. Trent's latest book is called The Awakened Woman: Remembering and Reigniting Our Sacred Dreams. She tells her incredible story in this episode and you will be so deeply moved, so deeply touched, and so deeply inspired by it. We'ver never heard anything like it and are honored that she would tell us about her astounding life. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait - there's more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It's that simple and we'll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Dr. Tererai Trent and I Discuss... Her book, The Awakened Woman: Remembering and Reigniting Our Sacred Dreams The two hungers in our life - the little hunger and the great hunger The hunger for a meaningful life Asking yourself, "what breaks my heart?" The rural community she grew up in The wisdom of her grandmother That her grandmother was defined by her wisdom Her answer to the question she was asked - what are your dreams? The moment she was told that her dreams were achievable When her mother said to write down her dreams and bury (i.e. plant) them in the ground. How she broke the cycle of poverty The baton of poverty, illiteracy, early marriage, and abuse that she redefined The baton of wisdom, that she received The four dreams she wrote down When her mother said, "your goals in life will be more achievable when connected to the greater good of your community" The difference between culture and customs The 8 years it took for her to graduate high school Getting into Oklahoma State University but not having enough money to fly to America Feeding the deep hunger that says - you can achieve your dreams When she reconnected with the woman who first believed in her When she finally earned her PhD She worked 3 jobs and took 18 hours of coursework and took care of 5 kids getting her food from trashcans How she is not a victim, she is part of the solution Where her kids are now "It is acheivable" How many girls her work has now impacted See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oliver Burkeman is an award-winning writer for The Guardian and his book, The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking explores the upsides of failure, difficulty, and imperfection – which we discussed in our first interview with Oliver several hundred episodes ago. Each week in his column in The Guardian, “This Column Will Change Your Life”, he writes about social psychology, self-help culture, productivity, and the science of happiness. In this interview, he discusses his take on time management in today’s world. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Oliver Burkeman and I Discuss… His take on the modern time management world That technologies of efficiency don’t seem to bring peace of mind How your to-do list is never going to go away That having emails in your inbox is not necessarily a problem Time management whispers of the possibility of true peace of mind Thinking of “a simpler time” How processing through your inbox is like climbing up an infinitely long ladder That tough choices have to be made when deciding what to do with your time – no matter how many productivity assists you have How it’s often easier to spend time on trivial stuff than the big projects David Allen’s book, Getting Things Done How no one beats them self up for not being able to jump a mile in the air because they never thought they could in the first place Similarly, accepting the real limitations in how much time you have and how much you can get done is incredibly liberating Productivity advice from Warren Buffet The role social media plays in our expectations about how productive we could or should be How digital distractions help us numb out Oliver Burkeman Links Homepage Facebook Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Eli Jaxon-Bear founded and currently teaches through The Leela Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to world peace and freedom through universal self-realization. Eli is also the author of many books, including the one we discuss in this episode, An Outlaw Makes it Home: The Awakening of a Spiritual Revolutionary. In this episode, he talks to Eric about accessing and experiencing your true self and things that get in the way of that. Also, he hits on a perspective of the Enneagram that we bet you’ve never considered before. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Eli Jaxon-Bear and I Discuss… His book, An Outlaw Makes it Home: The Awakening of a Spiritual Revolutionary Discovering who is feeding the wolves within That to know your true self you have to turn away from your false self – the self you construct in your mind NLP, the Enneagram and hypnosis integrated into his therapy His lasting enlightenment Knowing what you really want and staying true to it in each moment The journey from “me” to “I” Symptom cure and habit control His book, Sudden Awakening How your heart is already intelligent and alive That the Enneagram Personality Types is actually the Enneagram of Character Fixation Asking, does this bring me freedom, true love, happiness? Go deeper than the character fixation and find your character Waking up from the act, from the show, and stop taking it personally having to prove things The character fixation of an Enneagram type 9 The “Chief Feature” All of our experience has a Mental, Emotional and Physical component and the ego encapsulates all three of those The history of the origins of the Enneagram His book on the Enneagram Eli Jaxon-Bear Links Homepage Facebook Twitter The Great Courses Plus thousands of courses in virtually any topic and you can listen on demand anywhere get a full month for FREE thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Phlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there. Visit www.phlur.com promo code WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler set Robinhood is an investing app that allows you to buy and sell stocks, EFTs, Options and Cryptos all commission free at any level. All it takes to do so is 4 taps in the app on your smartphone so it makes investing easy for beginners and experienced people alike. For The One You Feed listeners, you can get a free stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio by going to youfeed.robinhood.com If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Belinda Gore Amoda Maa See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This mini episode is about the importance of taking small steps and how being consistent is not about being perfect. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Catherine Gray is a listener favorite guest on the show. She’s been on once before to talk about her book, The Unexpected Joy of being Sober and we received so many messages about how people loved the conversation Eric had with her. In this episode, she’s here to discuss her new book, The Unexpected Joy of being Single: Locating Happily Single Serenity. Are you single? Then obviously this episode is for you. Are you in a relationship? Then – unexpectedly – this episode is also for you! Too often, people stay in bad relationships because they’re afraid of being single, afraid of being alone. You don’t want to feel trapped where you are – you want to be empowered knowing that where you are is where you CHOOSE to be – not where you HAVE to be. So, re-framing what it means and what it’s like to be single opens up everyone’s world by bringing you to the point of choice about your relationship status, rather than the point of “panic settling” or “victim mentality” about your relationship status. Trust us, you’re going to like this one. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Catherine Gray and I Discuss… Her book,The Unexpected Joy of being Single: Locating Happily Single Serenity That being single is not terrible! How being single is a whole lot better than “panic settling” That being single can be nourishing and refreshing – it has everything to do with reframing the way you see it Enjoying where you are at the time That there are pros and cons to being in a relationship and there are also pros and cons to being single The “if-then” happiness loop that’s a moving target How you get used to what you have and then you shoot for the next thing Choosing your perspective on your life and counting up your gratitudes That being single is WAY BETTER than being in a bad relationship How people stay in bad relationships because they’re afraid of being single, afraid of being alone What being a “love addict” means How you need bonding with 5 people in your life – not just 1 – to be happy How essential it is to like yourself in order to be happy in a healthy relationship The three different attachment styles that are created in early childhood (but can be changed in adulthood): anxious attached, secure attached, avoidant attached How feminism – in other words, equality – has made it socially acceptable for women to be single now A thought doesn’t have to lead to an action Don’t let yourself get too “HALT” (Hungry Angry Lonely Tired) Catherine Gray Links Homepage Instagram Twitter Daily Harvest – they deliver absolutely delicious organic, carefully sourced, chef-created fruit and veggie smoothies, soups, overnight oats, bowls and more. To get 3 cups free in your first box, visit www.daily-harvest.com and enter promo code: feed Thirdlove – they have 70 sizes including their signature 1/2 cup sizes! Find your perfect fit online in 60 seconds with their no tape measure needed fit finder. Get 15% off our first order at www.thirdlove.com/wolf Quip has guiding features that are a built-in support system for better brushing and it’s an affordable $25. Visit www.getquip.com/wolf get your first refill pack for free If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Catherine Gray (First interview 2018) Mary O’Malley See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jonathan Rottenberg is an Associate Professor of Psychology at the University of South Florida where he’s the director of the mood and emotion laboratory. He’s also the author of the book, The Depths: The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic“, which he and Eric have discussed before. In this interview, they discuss some of the studies and research he’s involved with specific to those who go on to flourish after having depression. Why do they? What can we learn from them? There’s hope and practical wisdom in this episode for you. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Jonathan Rottenberg and I Discuss… His book, The Depths: The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic Thriving after depression The studies and research he’s involved with People who thrive after depression The destructive and recurring nature of depression The typical low expectation for those with depression about life moving forward and how it should be different What is mental “health”? Psychological well being Experiencing positive emotions Experiencing negative emotions to a lesser degree Feeling of balance in life Having meaningful relationships Feeling a sense of autonomy over your life How happy should we expect to be? Having elements of wellbeing amidst struggling with depression The 3 things that seed a low mood: events, temperaments, and routines Rumination Ways that people can work with depression more skillfully Having a different relationship with your negative thoughts Having connections with others Research on flourishing How much control do we have over our state of flourishing? That it’s never too late There is hope Our culture that idealizes euphoria The role of our basic temperament Factors of wellbeing other than emotion and mood The organization he helped found, Depression Army The interesting and transformative experience of depression That his depression has been defanged and it doesn’t break the skin anymore Jonathan Rottenberg, Ph.D. Links: Depression Army Facebook Twitter Instagram Blinkist – Do you have an ever-growing list of books to read? Blinkist can help! With thousands of non-fiction books distilled down to their most salient points that you can consume in 15 minutes or less, go to www.blinkist.com/wolf for a 7-day free trial Policy Genius helps you compare insurance plans and find the right policy for you at a price you can afford and then they handle everything – negotiating your rate and booking your appointment. Visit www.policygenius.com Robinhood is an investing app that allows you to buy and sell stocks, EFTs, Options and Cryptos all commission free at any level. All it takes to do so is 4 taps in the app on your smartphone so it makes investing easy for beginners and experienced people alike. For The One You Feed listeners, you can get a free stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio by going to youfeed.robinhood.com If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Johan Hari Lisa Feldman Barrett Therese Borchard See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Susan David is a psychologist on faculty at Harvard Medical School. She’s also the co-founder and co-director of The Institute of Coaching at McLean Hospital and is CEO of Evidence-Based Psychology. Her book is, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life. Have you ever gotten hooked by a difficult emotion? In other words, have you ever felt compelled to act on a strong feeling without having any space to think about your action first? If so, you will find really helpful wisdom in this episode that you can take, apply today and live a more skillful, open-hearted life. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Susan David and I Discuss… Her book, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life How emotions are a guidance system That emotions can help us adapt and thrive The thinking “unless I’m happy all the time, something is wrong” Emotional Agility Loosening up, calming down and living with more intention The space between stimulus and response Emotional rigidity Allowing the story in our head to drive our actions Being who we most want to be in this world Moving away from the idea of “I have a thought and the thought is fact and I have to act on it” Getting hooked – accepting thought as fact That we are not our emotions – our emotions are a data source The story that imprisons and keeps us from acting in an open-hearted way How to get unhooked Getting curious and compassionate about our emotions when we’re hooked I’m noticing that I’m feeling ____ Creating a safe psychological space for ourselves “Walking your why” Choice points: do I move towards my values or away from my values? Social contagion Keeping your values front of mind Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life That our difficult emotions (like anxiety, for example) don’t have to go away in order for us to live according to our values Under our difficult emotions are signposts for our values Premature cognitive commitment Stories help us to make sense of our world Naming our stories Susan David, Ph.D. Links: susandavid.com Ted Talk – Susan David, Ph.D. Facebook Twitter Instagram Daily Harvest delivers absolutely delicious, organic, carefully sourced, chef created fruit and veggie smoothies, soups, overnight oats, bowls and more! To get 3 cups free in your first box, visit www.daily-harvest.com and enter promo code: feed The Great Courses Plus offers thousands of courses in virtually any topic and you can listen on demand anywhere. To get a full month for FREE, visit thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Phlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there. Visit www.phlur.com and enter promo code: WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler set. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Parker Palmer is a writer, teacher, and activist whose work speaks deeply to many people in many different walks of life. He’s the founder and senior partner in The Center for Courage and Renewal. He’s the author of many books, including his newest one which we talk about on this episode: On The Brink of Everything: Grace, Gravity and Getting Old. Parker is one of our favorite guests of the show and after you listen to this episode, you’ll know why he’s back for a second conversation. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Parker Palmer and I Discuss… His book, On The Brink of Everything: Grace, Gravity and Getting Old His reflections looking back on his life The resilient fabric of his life How perfection is an illusion The role mistakes can play in one’s life The gift of age: Looking back on one’s life and saying “It all belongs” Another gift of age: Deep appreciation and gratitude for the present moment Feeling like you’re one of the lucky ones that you’re “old” Asking “What’s there for me to learn?” when facing problematic moments in life (like feeling down, or feeling self-pity) Moments of life that are burdened with ego The correlation between ego concerns and anxiety The importance and role of perspective The what and why of the things we’re doing The question (and trap!): Does my life have meaning? My legacy vs Our legacy How we’re all embedded in community “I planted some seeds and found some people I wanted to garden with…” How life and work are profoundly communal Reflecting on the question, “Have I been sufficiently open to and aware of the significant contributions others have made in my life – and in such a way to do a deep bow to them in the work that I do?” Turning attention outward vs inward Being one among many vs trying to be something or someone special The healing impact of getting out into the natural world His poem “Harrowing” To know when to say, “enough” because the rest of the world and the rest of my life is waiting Parker Palmer Links Homepage Facebook Twitter The Great Courses Plus – Thousands of courses in virtually any topic and you can listen on demand anywhere. Get a full month for FREE! thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Thirdlove – they have 70 sizes including their signature 1/2 cup sizes! Find your perfect fit online in 60 seconds with their no tape measure needed fit finder. Get 15% off our first order at www.thirdlove.com/wolf Robinhood is an investing app that allows you to buy and sell stocks, EFTs, Options, and Cryptos all commission free at any level. All it takes to do so is 4 taps in the app on your smartphone so it makes investing easy for beginners and experienced people alike. For The One You Feed listeners, get a free stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio by going to youfeed.robinhood.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In This Interview, Dean Sluyter and I Discuss… His book, Fear Less: Living Beyond Fear, Anxiety, Anger, and Addiction Right View and how it relates to having less fear in your life How right view is always liberating Asking, “does it help?” “One mustn’t assume burdens that God doesn’t lay upon us. The state of worry is not itself meritorious.” CS Lewis The problem with trying to control your mind Transcendental Meditation Hanging out in tasklessness The open space of awareness How thought doesn’t have to go away in order to meditate Relax your grip, and relax back into yourself It doesn’t grip you, it has no power to do that. You grip it. What it means to relax at the moment of contact Relax into it, stop the resistance of it Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional suffering = pain x resistance Dean Sluyter Links Homepage Meditation Youtube Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Megan Devine is a pioneer in the fields of grief support and emotional intelligence. Since 2009, she’s been writing and talking about grief and love, shaking up our culture’s ideas about both all along the way. In this episode we discuss these topics along with her newest book,It’s OK That You’re Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn’t Understand Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Megan Devine and I Discuss… Her book, It’s OK That You’re Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn’t Understand That the way we deal with grief in our culture is broken How grief is a no-win situation for everyone The fact that we don’t like to talk about grief How we carry losses with us The myth that happiness is the same as health and that if you’re not happy, you’re doing something wrong That some things cannot be fixed, they can only be carried How cruel it is to say everything happens for a reason and that you create your reality Our limited tools for going through difficulty Victim blaming How we can’t be 100% safe That we aren’t 100% in control of how we react to things If we think grief is a problem to be solved, all of our tools will fail us Sadness isn’t a problem either How you can’t “get over it and put it behind you” The importance of having pain Heard, Honored and Validated The power of listening and curiosity Thinking of pain as an experience to be tended The things we have to live through and endure, that we can’t escape Making these difficult things gentler on us Decreasing suffering inside of grief Wellness vs. worseness Paying attention to the cause and effect of things The hierarchy of grief Treating compassion as the abundant resource that it is Hope Meeting people where they are Asking: Do you want empathy or a problem solved right now? Asking: What do you need in this moment? What would feel useful right now? You can’t heal someone’s pain by trying to take it away from them The importance of showing yourself kindness Megan Devine Links Homepage Animation on Grief Instagram Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jonathan Rauch is a senior fellow at the Brookings Institute, the author of 6 books (and many, many articles) and is a contributing editor of The Atlantic. His latest book is The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50. See what you think about the trends of happiness in your life compared to the tendency he describes in his book and this interview. It may be that the emotional peak of life is different than when you’d expect. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Jonathan Rauch and I Discuss… His book, The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50 Connection to others Generosity The factors that most contribute to our happiness The U shape curve of happiness in life The emotional peak of life How our expectations change as life goes on That our values continue to change The fact that our brains change over the course of a lifetime How the effects of connectedness are cumulative and durable The hedonic treadmill What to do to be happier at the bottom of the curve The suffering that comes from social comparison Staying in the present moment Internal criticism Guilt vs Shame in mid-life The benefits of being other-directed, other-oriented How the voice of impulsiveness isn’t our friend Jonathan Rauch Links Homepage Twitter The Great Courses Plus gives in-depth knowledge on a variety of topics like psychology, science, philosophy, cooking, photography and more. Watch or listen to a course whenever, wherever for FREE. To start your free trial now go to www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Phlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there. Visit www.phlur.com and use promo code WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler set. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After a career as a designer in the tech industry, John Zeratsky became obsessed with the idea of re-designing time. He’s a writer who has written multiple books and his work has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Time, Harvard Business Review, Wired, Fast Company, and many others. In this episode, among other things, we discuss his newest book, Make Time: How to Focus on What Matters Every Day. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you !n This Interview, John Zeratsky and I Discuss… His book, Make Time: How to Focus on What Matters Every Day Understanding the limits on will-power Setting up our world around us so it’s easier to make the right decisions Creating more time in your day for the things you care about The two powerful forces that compete every day for our time “The Busy Bandwagon” The Infinity Pools Questioning the “defaults” in our schedule Creating a highlight for every day Living a “someday” life Finding more meaningful moments Urgency, Satisfaction, Joy Batch the little stuff Laser mode Taking back control of your time and energy Creating barriers to distraction Managing your energy Building your energy Focusing on the process not the outcome John Zeratsky Links Homepage Twitter The Great Sources Plus gives in-depth knowledge on a variety of topics like psychology, science, philosophy, cooking, photography and more. Watch or listen to a course whenever, wherever for FREE. To start your free trial now go to www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Calm- The number one app that helps you meditate, sleep and relax. For a limited time, get 25% off a Calm premium subscription – giving you access to ALL their content – at www.calm.com/wolf See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Marilyn Nelson on Her Beautiful, Powerful Poetry Marilyn Nelson is an American poet, translator and children’s book author. She’s a professor emeritus at The University of Connecticut and the former poet laureate of Connecticut. In this episode, Eric and Marilyn discuss several poems she’s written as well as the meaning behind them. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Marilyn Nelson and I Discuss… Her book, How I Discovered Poetry Her poem, Mississippi Her book, A Wreath for Emmett Till The poetry form of a heroic crown of sonnets Her poem, Rosemary for Remembrance Her poem, Let Me Gather Spring Flowers For a Wreath Her poem, Like His Gouged Eye How poetry comes out of silence and leads us back to silence The value of silence in a life well lived Silence, contemplation, and self-knowledge Our quiet center Her book, Carver Her poem, Professor Carver’s Bible Class Her book, Snook Alone Marilyn Nelson Links Homepage Facebook Netsuite by Oracle – the business software that handles every aspect of your business in an easy to use cloud platform. Get Netsweep’s free guide, Crushing the 5 Barriers to Growth, by going to www.netsuite.com/wolf Thirdlove – they have 70 sizes including their signature 1/2 cup sizes! Find your perfect fit online in 60 seconds with their no tape measure needed fit finder. Get 15% off our first order at www.thirdlove.com/wolf Blinkist – Do you have an ever-growing list of books to read? Blinkist can help! With thousands of non-fiction books distilled down to their most salient points that you can consume in 15 minutes or less go to www.blinkist.com/wolf for a 7 day free trial See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Roger Housden is a second time guest on the show – you might remember him from episode 152. He founded The Open Gate which is a conference and workshop center in England that introduced the work of Ram Dass and Thich Nhat Hanh and many others into Europe. You also might have seen his work featured in places like O Magazine, The New York Times and The Los Angeles Times. In this episode, Roger and Eric discuss his beautiful book, 10 Poems for Difficult Times. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Roger Housden and I Discuss… His book, 10 Poems for Difficult Times Saying “there is happiness happening” or “there is anger happening” rather than “I am angry” or “I am happy” How poetry helps us in difficult times That poetry gives voice to that which is unsayable The poet Ellen Bass How suffering can soften us if we bow down to it That you can’t fake surrender The opportunity in suffering is growth How poetry points us in the direction of possibility in suffering The poet Maggie Smith The poet Marie Howe Annunciation by Marie Howe The specific pointing to the universal in poetry Roger Housden Links Homepage Twitter Facebook Phlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there www.phlur.compromo code WOLF 20 off first custom sampler set Quip has guiding features that are a built-in support system for better brushing www.getquip.com/wolfand get your first refill pack for free See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Steven C Hayes is Nevada Foundation Professor at the Department of Psychology at the University of Nevada. He is an author of over 35 books and over 500 scientific articles. He is considered one of the founders of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. In 1992 he was listed by the Institute for Scientific Information as the 30th “highest impact” psychologist in the world. His work has been recognized by several awards including the Exemplary Contributions to Basic Behavioral Research and Its Applications from Division 25 of APA, the Impact of Science on Application award from the Society for the Advancement of Behavior Analysis, and the Lifetime Achievement Award from the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies. He is best known for his book Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Steven C Hayes and I Discuss… The One You Feed parable His book, Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life The ACT approach to therapy That you know if your thoughts are good or bad by the fruits that they bear The difference between pain and suffering The importance of putting the human mind on a leash That suffering comes from when we mishandle the present moment, and we amplify certain thoughts and feelings The meaning of Cognitive Fusion: when we can look only from our thoughts and not at our thoughts The importance of and various types of contemplative practice Various diffusion techniques (listed in a free episode download!) The concept and practice of experiential avoidance The full impact of acting for “short term gains with long term pains” The idea of creating larger behavioral patterns The role of values based action Steven C Hayes Links Homepage Facebook TED Talk See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Paul Hannam has started, owned and managed a number of successful businesses and he taught business and environmental management at Oxford University. His new book is The Wisdom of Groundhog Day: How to Improve Your Life One Day at a Time. Before you jump to thinking you know what he’s going to say about this – wait and listen to this episode. You’ll be surprised and intrigued by his insight and recommendations based on this movie. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Paul Hannam and I Discuss… His book, The Wisdom of Groundhog Day: How to Improve Your Life One Day at a Time The controlled experiment of Groundhog Day (the film) The life skill of experimentation Investigating our behavior Working on changing one variable at a time Keeping a journal Asking “what is my role in creating my mood?” Looking inward for the answer Making change 1 day at a time The action of our inner life Narrowing the spectrum of life through routine The inner monotony How you have everything you need to be happy now Slowing down with mindfulness Grounding yourself in your senses Connecting with nature The conditioned self The authentic self Conditioning, Circumstances and Our Mind How our brain doesn’t like change The 5 characteristics of our conditioned self Try looking at things in a new way Trying to control our inner state Letting go of outcomes Paul Hannam Links Homepage Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tim Pychyl is an Associate Professor of Psychology at Carlton University and hosts a podcast called I Procrastinate. His book that we discuss in this episode is on that very topic – it’s called Solving the Procrastination Puzzle: A Concise Guide to Strategies for Change But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Tim Pychyl and I Discuss… His book, Solving the Procrastination Puzzle: A Concise Guide to Strategies for Change How it’s in the getting on in life that makes a life That procrastination can be an existential matter What he tells his children: I didn’t ask what you want to do or how you feel, I told you it’s time to make your bed. When we procrastinate we delay getting on with our lives Being an active member or your own life The two ways procrastination compromises our health Stress Fewer wellness behaviors Treatment delay “I’ll look after that later” Procrastination being a problem of self-regulated behavior I won’t give in to feel good Goal Intentions and Implementation intentions When….then… Giving the monkey something to do What’s the next action? Keeping it small Hacks to work around our irrational thinking Motivation and then Action or Action and then Motivation The meaning behind our goals Meaning and Manageability Asking what will this cost me if I put it off? Prefer tomorrow over today Thinking “I’ll feel like doing it tomorrow” Affect forecasting Thinking of your future self as a stranger Developing empathy for future self Self-handicap to preserve self-esteem Tim Pychyl Links Homepage Twitter Tim’s Psychology Today Page Blinkist – Join the 5 million people already using Blinkist to read or listen to non-fiction books in 15 minutes or less! Free 7 day trial www.blinkist.com/wolf Quip Electric toothbrush – the perfect stocking stuffer that will be used every day and everyone needs! They’ll think of you every day when they use it. www.quip.com/wolf get your first refill pack free TalkSpace – the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. www.talkspace.com/wolf Promo Code WOLF to get $45 off your first month. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hilary Jacobs Hendel is a psychotherapist who switched from practicing traditional talk psychotherapy to accelerated experimental dynamic psychotherapy. She teaches us that our core emotions are automatic and grounded in universal physical experiences. Her new book is called, It’s Not Always Depression: Working The Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to your Authentic Self. In this episode, she goes into great instructional detail about how to identify and process your emotions in the moment. If you’ve ever felt a strong emotion (and who hasn’t), this episode will teach you how to move through it skillfully, rather than having your strong emotions wreak havoc in yourself and with others. RxBar & RxNut Butter wants to build delicious food the right way – with transparency on their simple, real ingredients. Get 25% off your first order of their best seller variety pack. Use URL http://www.rxbar.com/wolf and enter promo code WOLF at checkout (the US only) Ancestry DNA- unlock your family story – the perfect holiday gift. To get it for the special price of $59 use URL http://www.ancestry.com/wolf In This Interview, Hilary Jabobs Hendel and I Discuss… Her new book, It’s Not Always Depression: Working The Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to your Authentic Self The 7 C’s of our authentic self The science and biology of emotions The change triangle The Core Emotions: Fear, Anger, Sadness, Disgust, Joy, Excitement and Sexual Excitement The 3 Inhibitory Emotions: Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame How core emotions have energy and want to come up and out- to be expressed Inhibitory emotions dampening our core emotions The difference between defenses and inhibitory emotions How to work The Change Triangle Trauma vs trauma The power of naming your emotions Our open-hearted state When our emotions overwhelm us, it can be helpful to have someone else process them Grounding and breathing The role of core emotions is to ready us for action so they are first physical sensations, traveling from the brain down the vegus nerve All core emotions have impulses associated with them How harmful self-criticism and self-judgment can be Relating to ourselves as a small child Healthy shame vs toxic shame Hilary Jacobs Hendel Links Homepage Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Neil Pasricha is a New York Times bestselling author with books published in over a dozen languages. He’s spent 7 years (and counting!) on best-seller lists and his books have sold millions of copies. You may know his blog – 1000 Awesome Things – it’s won 2 Webby awards for the Best Blog in the World and has had over 50 million hits. His most recent book, The Happiness Equation: Want Nothing + Do Anything = Have Everything, is what we focus much of this interview on. You’ll learn really practical advice, grounded in research and science, on what you can do to be happier. Fin – Do you feel like you can never get everything on your to-do list done? Get a little extra help getting tasks crossed off with Fin, a digital personal assistant which can do things like book travel plans or find contractors to fix things around the house. Send Fin a couple of requests for free! Use the link www.fin.com/wolf Ancestry DNA – give the gift of finding out your family history www.ancestry.com/wolf $59 Quip – an electric toothbrush that makes brushing better at an affordable price $25 www.getquip.com/wolf get your first refill pack free In This Interview, Neil Pasricha and I Discuss… His book, The Happiness Equation: Want Nothing + Do Anything = Have Everything The 9 critical steps in achieving the happiness equation The 7 ways to be happy right now The benefits of 3 brisk 30-minute nature walks each week The power of random – or conscious – acts of kindness A complete unplug Why you should never retire Social, Stimulation, Story The importance of structure The bench test for all major life decisions His upcoming audible book on resilience The war between more and enough Neil Pasricha Links Homepage Instagram Twitter Neil’s New Audible Show See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Omid Safi on Radical Love See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ralph De La Rosa on the Mind as Your Teacher See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ruth King is an emotional wisdom author, coach, and consultant. She's a guiding teacher at Insight Meditation Community of Washington and she's on the teacher's council at Spirit Rock Meditation Center. In addition, she's the founder of Mindful Members Insight Meditation Community in Charlotte, NC. She has a Master's Degree in Clinical Psychology and is the author of several publications including her new book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism from the Inside Out. In this stirring, thoughtful and wise conversation, she touches on the heart of racism and teaches how we can move to heal this heart disease. Get Ad-Free Episodes and More Ancestry DNA - more detailed in the different regions globally- www.ancestry.com/wolf get your kit for $59 Casper - you spend 1/3 of your life sleeping so you need to be sleeping on the right mattress that's comfortable for you. Casper mimics the shape of your body. Affordable because it cuts out the middleman and sells direct to you www.casper.com/oneyoufeed promo code oneyoufeed get $50 towards select mattresses In This Interview, Ruth King and I Discuss... Her book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism From The Inside Out The value of being curious about the good and bad wolves inside of us Racism being a heart disease that is curable Her open heart surgery at the age of 27 Rage being an exit route Rage being energy moving through the body Habitual patterns of racism being a layer on top of the real issue that we can't tolerate - they are defense mechanisms Racial affinity groups 6 hindrances The structure of racism Racism vs Prejudice Racist vs Racism Understanding our own experience with racism and talking about it What it's like to be "membered" Individual vs group identity Diversity within the body of color Ruth King Links Homepage Facebook Please support the show with a donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Chances are, you've heard the name James Clear. Especially if you have done any research whatsoever about building habits. That's kinda his neck of the woods. His work has appeared in The New York Times, CBS This Morning, Time, Entrepreneur and he has taught in colleges around the world. In this episode, part 2 of a 2 part series, he talks more about his new book, Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones. You'll learn some really specific, easy and flat out "why didn't I think of that" genius methods to apply to your life and habits. Get Ad-Free Episodes and More Quip electric toothbrush fraction of the cost of other electric toothbrushes www.getquip.com/wolf and get first refill packet free Bombas INCREDIBLY comfortable socks which is reason enough to wear them but they ALSO donate a pair to a local homeless shelter for every pair that they sell get 20% off first purchase www.bombas.com/wolf offer code WOLF Blinkist- read or listen to thousands of nonfiction book summaries all on your phone in under 15 minutes www.blinkist.com/wolf to start your7-day free trial In This Interview, James Clear and I Discuss... His book, Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones Habits are a response to the physical cues in our environment Increasing the friction it takes to complete the task The more you increase the steps between you and the bad behavior or decrease the steps between you and the good behavior the better Habit stacking/Anchoring "After _____ I will _____" The more specific the better Social environment and habits You want to join groups where your desired behavior is the normal behavior Make it easy The two-minute rule A habit must be established before it can be improved Optimize for the starting line rather than the finish line Make it satisfying Feel successful at the end Bring the long-term consequences into the short term James Clear Links Homepage Instagram Twitter Please support the show with a donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

James Clear on the Compounding Nature of Habits Part 1 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we talk to Dr. Gabor Mate´ about addiction A renowned speaker, and bestselling author, Dr. Gabor Maté is highly sought after for his expertise on a range of topics including addiction, stress and childhood development. For twelve years Dr. Maté worked in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside with patients challenged by hard-core drug addiction, mental illness and HIV, including at Vancouver’s Supervised Injection Site. As an author, Dr. Maté has written several bestselling books including the award-winning In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction; When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress; and Scattered Minds: A New Look at the Origins and Healing of Attention Deficit Disorder, and co-authored Hold on to Your Kids. His works have been published internationally in twenty languages. Dr. Maté is the co-founder of Compassion for Addiction, a new non-profit that focusses on addiction. He is also an advisor of Drugs over Dinner. Dr. Maté has received the Hubert Evans Prize for Literary Non-Fiction; an Honorary Degree (Law) from the University of Northern British Columbia; an Outstanding Alumnus Award from Simon Fraser University; and the 2012 Martin Luther King Humanitarian Award from Mothers Against Teen Violence. He is an adjunct professor in the Faculty of Criminology, Simon Fraser University. In This Interview, Dr. Gabor Mate´ and I Discuss... The One You Feed parable The degree of choice we have in life What is the Realm of the Hungry Ghosts? What is addiction? The characteristics of addiction Recognizing what addicts get out of their addiction The fundamental question is not “Why the Addiction” but “Why the Pain” How all addiction comes out of some hurt or trauma The different types of trauma The role of neurotransmitters in addiction How drugs and alcohol destroy the parts of the brain that allow us to make sound decisions Whether or not genetics play a significant role in addiction Whether our culture breeds addiction How our children get most of their leadership from other children How the breakup of family, community and clan is contributing to addiction The critical role of the culture in our the development of our brains Recognizing our inherent value To what degree we have freedom over our choices Without consciousness, there is no freedom Paths to recovery How compassion can help with recovery Developing compassionate curiosity towards ourselves Dr. Gabor Mate´ Links Homepage TED Talk Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

249: Tara Brach- Re-Release See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dorothy Hunt on The Heart of Awareness See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Miguel Chen is a meditation practitioner, a yoga instructor, a yoga studio owner and the bass player for a punk rock band. He has also published a book called I Wanna Be Well: How a Punk Found Peace and You Can Too. In this compelling episode, Eric and Miguel explore the connection between punk rock and Buddhism and they dive into the experiences in his life - both traumatic and positive - that have shaped his spiritual path of awakening. Please support the show with a donation Bombas INCREDIBLY comfortable socks which is reason enough to wear them but they ALSO donate a pair to a local homeless shelter for every pair that they sell get 20% off first purchase www.bombas.com/wolf offer code WOLF LinkedIn Find talent whether they're looking for a job or not. Focus on finding the right people regardless of their employment status. www.linkedin.com/wolf $50 off your first job posting Phlur Expertly crafted sustainably produced perfumes without all the bad stuff sold at an honest price. Go to their website to view pictures, listen to sounds and connect with words...if you like those, chances are you'll like the scent associated with them and they'll send you a 3 sampler kit to see. www.phlur.com use the promo code WOLF to get 20% off your custom Phlur sampler set In This Interview, Miguel Chen and I Discuss... His book, I Wanna Be Well: How a Punk Found Peace and You Can Too How he owns a yoga studio and plays in a punk rock band The way he suppressed grief for dead family members Asking himself why he wasn't happy The connection between punk rock and Buddhism The other as self Forgetting who we are The importance of being mindful throughout life Not being present with stuff we like Not being present with stuff we don't like Eating mindfully How if you're used to disconnecting from things you don't like, it starts creeping into the things you do like How he stays in the present moment Training the mind His morning routine Non-attachment Being criticized for his spiritual practice His spiritual practice while on tour The danger of taking people in life for granted How grateful he is that he woke up early in his life Why some people get motivated to get sober and others don't Miguel Chen Links Homepage Instagram Twitter Please support the show with a donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Julie Simon on Emotional Eating See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Scott Edelstein on Discerning the Role of a Spiritual Teacher See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Brandi Lust on Growth via the Present Moment See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Chris Bailey on Focus, Productivity and Meditation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Terry Patten on Inner-Work and Outer-Work See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jillian Pransky is a Certified Yoga Therapist, a teacher and an author of the new book, Deep Listening: A Healing Practice to Calm Your Body, Clear Your Mind and Open Your Heart. In this interview, Jillian dives deep into the topic of somatic listening; what it is, why it's important, how to do it and the benefits you can expect. Restorative Yoga is an avenue for this type of work and it can be life changing to say the least. Do you experience tension in your body? Do you have unpleasant feelings? Do you feel exhausted? If your answer is yes or sometimes to any of these questions, you'll want to hear what Jillian Pransky has to say in this episode. Fin digital assistant knows your preferences, can pay bills, email on your behalf, on demand, only pay for what you use, integrate with your calendar and email try it for free at www.fin.com/wolf $60 of Fin's time/tasks to see if you like it Bombas socks Jacob a friend of the show has switched his entire sock drawer to Bombas! Donates a pair of socks for every pair sold save 20% www.bombas.com/wolf offer code wolf Simple Habit on the go to calm your nerves make mindfulness and meditation easy www.simplehabit.com/wolf to get a free 7 day trial of their premium library In This Interview, Jillian Pransky and I Discuss... Her book, Deep Listening: A Healing Practice to Calm Your Body, Clear Your Mind and Open Your Heart How she used to believe anxiety and depression was a choice Learning to be with the bad wolf Befriending her bad wolf That not everything can be fixed When surrender is needed Not being able to fix some way someone has treated us Restorative Yoga Paying attention to our body and mind so that we're aware of how we shut down and open up and to be with it with openness Deep listening to yourself can leave you more hard and cutoff or open and tender The tension in our body signifying the stress response Paying attention long enough that it softens and shifts Judging the tension we find in our bodies Getting curious about the tension we find, breathing into it Asking "How am I still guarding myself when I don't have to be?" during Restorative Yoga "Doing Less" How the busier we are the less we have to feel Listening is the act of allowing Love is the act of allowing Allowing yourself to be supported even when you're active That which is regular is way better than that which is a lot A little bit all the time re-wires us How exhausting it is to be somewhere we're not Our thoughts are like social media Forward thinking and past thinking after present moment being Letting go vs Letting be Analogy of salt in water: shot glass vs mason jar "The practice isn't about learning how to stay here but learning how to come back." Jillian Pransky Links Homepage Facebook Twitter Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Judson Brewer MD PhD is widely considered an expert in the areas of habit change, the "science of self-mastery" and mindfulness training for addiction. He has published a number of peer-reviewed articles and book chapters, he has trained US Olympic coaches, and his work has been featured on 60 Minutes, TEDMED, Time, Forbes, BBC, NPR, Businessweek and others. So - you get the idea...this guy knows what he's talking about and what he's talking about is fascinating. It's a very different approach to ridding yourself of addiction and it works. it works much better than even currently accepted "gold standard programs" and it's something you can learn how to do today. In fact, you can learn how to do it by listening to this episode. Please Support The Show with a Donation Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Sanebox Biggest time waster at work - automatically filters out the emails that don't need your focus. Get your email under control free 2 week trial and get a $25 credit www.sanebox.com/wolf The Great Courses Plus app streaming service where you can learn anything that interests you. iRest research based form of deep meditation 10 step meditation practice Feed your curiosity. Feed your good wolf. thousands of lectures and lessons on human behavior, history, science, cooking, photography, drawing Get a full month of unlimited access for free www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Want to feel like you're sleeping in a 5-star hotel? Try a Casper mattress at no hassle to you and get $50 off select mattresses Go to www.casper.com/oneyoufeed promo code oneyoufeed In This Interview, Judson Brewer and I Discuss... His book, The Craving Mind: From Cigarettes to Smartphones to Love - Why We Get Hooked and How We Can Break Bad Habits Trigger, Behavior, Result Rewards and Punishments Habit Loop Subjective Bias Addiction: Continued use despite adverse consequences Addiction: a way to avoid something Every time we give in to a craving, we reinforce that habit loop Cravings are like stray cats If you don't feed a craving it will burn itself out Surfing a craving The way cravings feel like they're going to crush us and last forever - cognitive distortion Craving Wave: come - crest - go away\ Awareness helps us surf these craving waves What does this feel like in my body right now? Paying attention to the craving rather than avoid it or make it go away RAIN This method had 5x quit rates than the gold standard smoking cessation program Substitute behavior In their quest for happiness, people mistake excitement of the mind for real happiness Investigate the craving and the reward Excitement brings contraction Get curious about your experiences - it helps you remain open Default mode network Conceptual vs Experiential Self The contraction of ego How we relate to our thoughts and feelings makes all the difference Jusdon Brewer Links Homepage Twitter Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm talking about the fears that come with leaving my job and how I'm working with that. And I'm sharing the thoughts about going from your full-time job to something else you might love. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Josh Korda is the guiding teacher of Dharma Punx in NYC and a fully empowered Buddhist teacher in the Against the Stream lineage. He has led numerous online and residential retreats and is also widely known for his podcast and as an author. His new book is called Unsubscribe: Opt Out of Delusion, Tune in to Truth. In this conversation with Eric, he talks about how to make changes in your life and he bases much of what he has to say on this topic on his Buddhist principals and own life experience. It's a comprehensive look at how we as humans can experience the impermanence of life. Since we all face this impermanence, it's a pretty important thing to grow more skillful in the way we interact with it. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Please Support The Show with a Donation The Great Courses Plus app streaming service where you can learn anything that interests you. Feed your curiosity. Feed your good wolf. thousands of lectures and lessons on human behavior, history, science, cooking, photography, drawing Get a full month of unlimited access for free www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf LinkedIn worlds largest professional network 70% of the workforce is already there - not just those looking for jobs. A new hire is made every 10 seconds using LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/wolf $50 off first job post Blinkist read or listen to thousands of nonfiction book summaries all on your phone in under 15 minutes www.blinkist.com/wolf to start your free trial or get 3 months off your yearly plan In This Interview, Josh Korda and I Discuss... His book, Unsubscribe: Opt Out of Delusion, Tune in to Truth How he deals with his depression Western mindfulness practice How it's not about always accepting or settling for toxic circumstances How it's not about always running away from healthy yet difficult circumstances The wisdom to know what to do with difficulty in the moment How to make significant life changes (based on his experience doing just that) Being willing to set boundaries Making change by talking harshly oneself only creates stress and you then associate the stress with the goal itself and you begin to procrastinate How our inner critic makes us want to avoid the very things we want to grow into Thought arrives after feeling and impulses Ways to change behavior without relying on thought "Corrective emotional response" The importance of an empathetic, safe therapist in effective therapy Josh Korda Links Homepage Twitter Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Anne Bogel is an author, podcast host, avid reader and personality assessment expert. That's what you'll see when you read her new book, How Seeing the World Through the Lens of Personality Changes Everything. In this interview, Eric and Anne cover a lot of ground; from book recommendations to the value and application of personality tests. If you are at all interested in personal growth, this episode will excite and inspire you to use valid personality tests as a tool to fuel that endeavor. If you've written off personality tests in the past, we encourage you to revisit the topic with an open mind as you listen to this episode. You may think differently 45 minutes from now. Please Support The Show with a Donation Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Bombas INCREDIBLY comfortable socks which is reason enough to wear them but they ALSO donate a pair to a local homeless shelter for every pair that they sell get 20% off first purchase www.bombas.com/wolf offer code WOLF In This Interview, Anne Bogel and I Discuss... Her book, Reading People: How Seeing the World Through the Lens of Personality Changes Everything Recent fiction books that she's read that she loved How we all have pain during the course of our lives The joy of reading literary fiction What is personality? The coping strategies we learn vs fundamental personality changes How our mind is inclined to work The way we see things Taking a personality test and answering questions based on how we want to be vs how we really are That if you don't know how you're really like, you can't move forward and grow as a person Common thoughts, feelings and behavior = our personality type Our character and our behavior are two things we can impact and change within ourselves with a lot of effort Personality tests not being a limiting thing Putting your strengths to work for you Putting effort towards things we can change vs things we can't change I'm the kind of person who _____ being a powerful phrase Fixed vs Growth mindset Highly sensitive people The emotional bank account Introverts vs Extroverts What you do consistently over time matters the 5:1 ratio when it comes to positive and negative experiences The Enneagram - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/ Anne Bogel Links Homepage Facebook Twitter Instagram Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Culadasa is a meditation master with over 4 decades of experience in the Tibetan and Theravadan Buddhist traditions. He taught classes in neuroscience and psychology at the Universities of Calgary and Brittish Columbia. He now lives in the Arizona wilderness and leads the Dharma Treasure Buddhist Sanga. His book on meditation, The Mind Illuminated, is the book Eric calls the best book on meditation he's ever read. This is a two-part interview. In this episode, part one, Eric and Culadasa talk about how the mind and brain works - knowledge that is essential to understand before one can successfully implement the meditation techniques that will be discussed in part two. These techniques have the very real potential of transforming your meditation experience. So listen up in this episode and get ready to radically re-understand this thing we call the mind. Please Support The Show with a Donation Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Sanebox helps organize your email inbox for a www.sanebox.com/wolf free trial for 2 weeks and a $25 credit Eric just replaced his entire sock drawer with all Bombas socks because of how much he loves them get 20% off first purchase www.bombas.com/wolf offer code WOLF In This Interview, Culadasa and I Discuss... His book, The Mind Illuminated The power of setting an intention for meditation Getting all of the mind on board for meditating Accepting whatever comes up Trying to enjoy your meditation, celebrating the times you come back to the present moment vs scolding yourself Roadmap of the stages of meditation over time How knowing the developmental nature of things over time can be problematic The difficulties of being a beginner at anything Looking for the pleasure and joy in wherever you are The 4 step process of settling in to meditate Feeling your breath at the nose The Mindful Review Being aware of the motivation behind your thoughts and speech What could I have done differently? Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Culadasa is a meditation master with over 4 decades of experience in the Tibetan and Theravadan Buddhist traditions. He taught classes in neuroscience and psychology at the Universities of Calgary and Brittish Columbia. He now lives in the Arizona wilderness and leads the Dharma Treasure Buddhist Sanga. His book on meditation, The Mind Illuminated, is the book Eric calls the best book on meditation he's ever read. This is a two-part interview. In this episode, part one, Eric and Culadasa talk about how the mind and brain works - knowledge that is essential to understand before one can successfully implement the meditation techniques that will be discussed in part two. These techniques have the very real potential of transforming your meditation experience. So listen up in this episode and get ready to radically re-understand this thing we call the mind. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. New science and research has changed the formula of improving hair and stopping hair loss 1st months supply with a subscription for $10 www.nutrafol.com promo code WOLF Read or listen to thousands of nonfiction book summaries all on your phone in under 15 minutes www.blinkist.com/wolf to start your free trial or get 3 months off your yearly plan In This Interview, Culadasa and I Discuss... His book, The Mind Illuminated How the mind and the brain works The basic distinction between attention and awareness How when we give labels to something we can know and understand it better The moments of consciousness model Non-perceiving moments of consciousness The dullness of meditation Sleepiness in meditation The goal of vipassana is to increase the total power of our cognitive abilities The mind system model (how the mind works) The conscious and unconscious mind Sensory sub-mind (taking in info through senses) Discriminating sub-mind (cognitive thinking/feeling) These sub-minds are competing for attention The conscious mind is a place that the sub-minds project into The power of setting intentions on the sub-minds The role of the narrating sub-mind We are a collection of the processes of the sub-minds Making intellectual sense of the experience of not-self See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Amoda Maa is a contemporary spiritual teacher and author. You may recognize the titles of some of her books: How to Find God in Everything, Change Your Life Change Your World and Radical Awakening. Her new book, Embodied Enlightenment: Living Your Awakening In Every Moment, is a powerful look at what awakening means, looks like and feels in your everyday life. She stresses that you can't think your way into awakening but that rather you feel your way into it. During this interview she talks about what that means and how to do it. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Casper mattress 4th of July offer July 9th www.casper.com/savings up to $225 off your order Quip electric toothbrush fraction of the cost of other electric toothbrushes www.getquip.com/wolf and get first refill packet free In This Interview, Amoda Maa and I Discuss... Her new book, Embodied Enlightenment: Living Your Awakening In Every Moment Awakening Waking up out of the dream of separation Waking up out of the dream of thinking that we are our thoughts and feelings Awakening not dependant on or a precursor to one's psychological health Surrendering the need to uphold oneself Surrendering the psychological self The need for psychological safety giving rise to egoic tendencies The defense and attack found in righteousness The verticality of being Not having an agenda of the outcome when opening ourselves to our experience and meeting it as it is How to be free from suffering The strength of life's intelligence The ripening that happens within oneself when you've finally had enough of running away from pain No real relief from pain and no final freedom from pain when all you're doing is running away from it Am I willing to meet this exactly as it is? Trying not to try True fulfillment is the emptying of the spiritual shopping basket The paradox of trying not to try Accumulating agendas = committing to a particular spiritual path and expecting that you'll feel worthy and good enough Love is seeking to know itself Silence is ever present in everything Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Johann Hari is an author and a journalist. His previous book was a New York Times Best Seller and his newest, Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression and the Unexpected Solutions, is no doubt on its way to share the same status. It proposes a more holistic, societal look at the causes and treatment of depression - more than the singular chemical imbalance explanation we traditionally consider. The core principal of getting our needs met is a thread that runs throughout this discussion and the deep dive that Johann Hari does on the subject will fascinate you and cause you to stop and think very differently than you have before on this topic that affects so many people in this world. Please Support The Show with a Donation Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Madison Reed - affordable, salon quality at home hair color kit get color matched www.madison-reed.com 10% off plus free shipping on first kit promo code WOLF In This Interview, Johann Hari and I Discuss... His new book, Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression and the Unexpected Solutions The two kinds of human connection Intrinsic (internal) and extrinsic (external) motivations "Junk" values The more you're driven by extrinsic values, the more likely you'll suffer from anxiety and depression in your life Our society drives us to live in this extrinsic way The whole point of advertising is to make us feel inadequate and our problems can be solved by buying Extrinsic motives can crowd out the more fulfilling intrinsic motives The 9 causes of depression and anxiety The need to look more holistically at anxiety and depression than just a chemical imbalance That the book is NOT saying not to take medications that help with anxiety and depression The loneliest culture that has ever been The importance of addressing the deep environmental factors/reasons why we're so depressed and anxious Our sense of home and sense of belonging The problems manifested by being isolated and alone The benefit of being part of a "tribe" Realizing that you're not the only one who struggles and feels the way you do Grief and the diagnosis of depression Just having a chemical imbalance means your pain doesn't have meaning Depression and not having your needs met Following the pain to its source Pathologizing Depression Johann Hari Links Lost Connections Homepage Twitter Facebook Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on The One You Feed we have Andrew Solomon. Andrew Solomon is a writer and lecturer on politics, culture and psychology. Solomon’s recent book, Far From the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity, published on November 13, 2012, won the National Book Critics Circle award for nonfiction among many other awards. The New York Times hailed the book, writing, “It’s a book everyone should read… there’s no one who wouldn’t be a more imaginative and understanding parent — or human being — for having done so… a wise and beautiful book.” People described it as “a brave, beautiful book that will expand your humanity.” Solomon’s previous book, The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression (Scribner, 2001), won the 2001 National Book Award for Nonfiction, was a finalist for the 2002 Pulitzer Prize, and was included in The Times of London‘s list of one hundred best books of the decade. A New York Times bestseller in both hardcover and paperback editions, The Noonday Demon has also been a bestseller in seven foreign countries, and has been published in twenty-four languages. The New York Times described it as “All-encompassing, brave, deeply humane… a book of remarkable depth, breadth and vitality… open-minded, critically informed and poetic all at the same time… fearless, and full of compassion.” In This Interview Andrew and I Discuss… The One You Feed parable. Using work to make the world a better place. The urgent business of living a moral life. How to decide what we should change and what we should accept. How hope can become the cornerstone of misery. The challenges and joys of parenting disabled children. The perfectionism of privilege. The importance of the choice to celebrate what is versus wishing it to be different. How we can grow through difficult circumstances. The poison of comparison. The idea of the “psychological supermodel”. Layering feelings of failure onto depression and how damaging that is. Learning to celebrate our difficulties and differences. A beautiful and hopeful reading on depression. How critical humor is in dealing with depression New approaches to treating depression. His ongoing challenges with depression and anxiety. The shame of mental illness. If you banish the dragons, you banish the heroes. A life that is only luxury and pleasure tends to feel rather hollow and empty. How sparing our children from all adversity is a bad idea. The choices we face. How encounters with darkness give us the energy to feed our good wolf. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Susan Piver is a New York Times bestselling author of 9 books and a renowned Buddhist teacher. This is Susan's second time on the show because we love her and her work so much. Her new book, The Four Noble Truths of Love: Buddhist Wisdom for Modern Relationships walks us through the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism as they apply to relationships. You don't have to be a Buddhist or study Buddhism to get a lot out of this conversation and her new book. She teaches universal pieces of wisdom that, when applied, will grow and deepen and enrich your relationships to a whole new level. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Please Support The Show with a Donation Quip toothbrush "brush better" on Oprah's list of good things, new brush heads every 3 months (dentist recommended) for $5 including free shipping worldwide! First replacement brush heads free www.getquip.com/wolf LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/wolf $50 credit towards your first job post - a better way to find talent for your organization In This Interview, Susan Piver and I Discuss... Her book, The Four Noble Truths of Love: Buddhist Wisdom for Modern Relationships The emotions underneath fear, hatred and greed Depression being a calcified sadness Turning towards sadness The four noble truths of love: Relationships are uncomfortable, Thinking that they should be comfortable contributes to that uncomfortableness, Meeting the discomfort and instability together IS love, There's a threefold path to do all of this Feeling your feelings without the story - what does it feel like in your body? In the environment? The difference between anger and irritation in the body The enormous space that opens up when we drop the expectation that when we solve "this" problem, the relationship will stabilize and we'll be happy Look at the problem itself as a team in relationships rather than blaming one another The threefold path: Precision, Openness, Going beyond The role and importance of good manners and honesty in relationships Good manners = thinking of the other person and making some accommodation, some space for them in your actions and your words Opening to the other person as they are in a relationship Intimacy has no end, it can always go deeper. You can always reveal more and you can always discover more In a relationship, commit to intimacy over love Addiction and abuse not included in this picture of relationship! How you can't think your way into intimacy or inspiration - they come when you make the space Passion between two people will constantly arise, abide and dissolve and though difficult, this is not a problem Wishing you were in a different part of the cycle is a problem, however Relax with what is and a space will open up Her take on suffering Her beautiful explanation of the concept of non-attachment/detachment A spiritual practice frees people up to feel everything in the moment, as it is Your life IS the spiritual path In meditation we're not trying to get anywhere, we're trying to BE somewhere Meditating in't about focusing on something but rather, bringing the brain down from some dreamworld into reality in the moment Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Michael Pollan is a writer whose books have topped the New York Times bestseller list time and time again. He teaches writing at Harvard and The University of California Berkley. In 2010, Time magazine name Michael Pollan one of the most influential people in the world. His books and essays have historically focused on our interaction with nature and this new book takes that theme to a whole other level. Its title gives you a great idea of what it's about: How to Change your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence. No matter how many interviews you've heard of Michael Pollan talking about his new book, our interview will offer you a fresh perspective, things he has not previously discussed and things that you may not have previously considered. The very last concept discussed in Eric's conversation with Michael Pollan will for sure leave you thinking anew. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. Our sponsor this week is Casper Mattress visit www.casper.com/oneyoufeed and use the promo code theoneyoufeed for $50 off your purchase In This Interview, Michael Pollan and I Discuss... His book, How to Change your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence How fear is a big motivator in people's action and inaction That your obstacles are all between your ears How consciousness is a big mystery What the newest science tells us about psychedelics The way psychedelics affect us by allowing us to look at normal, everyday consciousness in new ways The default mode network going quiet during a psychedelic trip The ego, idea of self in the brain and our life Psychedelics impact on the sense of self The experience of the dissolution of the ego The mind-expanding power of mystical experience The theory of the entropic brain How the brain works to reduce uncertainty and surprise The narrowing of consciousness by rigid thinking The stories our brains tell us Insufficient entropy in the brain perhaps leading to mental illnesses Psychedelics disordering the brain The similarities between a tripping brain on psychedelics and a meditative brain An ego-free state of consciousness through the use of psychedelics The mistake of seeing spirituality as the opposite of materialism The opposite of spiritual being egotistical The ego keeps us from having a deep connection with everything around us How psychedelics are "wasted on the young" That those in the 2nd half of their lives may benefit most from the use of psychedelics The importance of breaking the rigidity that growing older brings How psychedelics can help us make peace with our death Psilocybin benefiting those facing imminent death with great fear How psychedelics and a psychodynamic approach are not opposites "Psychedelic assisted psychotherapy" Positive trauma in the brain Administering an experience rather than a drug The importance of set and setting when taking a psychedelic How a spiritual experience alone doesn't make a spiritual life That ego is nothing but a contraction Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Austin Channing Brown is a writer, speaker, and practitioner who helps schools, nonprofits, and religious organizations practice genuine inclusion. She is passionate about the advancement of racial justice and reconciliation and her words will most certainly move you to action. In her work, she shares her experiences as a black woman who "navigates whiteness on a regular basis". After listening to this interview and reading her book, your mind and heart will be broadened towards understanding and inclusion - regardless of where you are on that spectrum today. Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program. In This Interview, Austin Channing Brown and I Discuss... Her book, I'm Still Here: Black Dignity in A World Made for Whiteness The importance and value of anger How we can fight the monsters without becoming the monsters That anger reveals something is wrong White fragility - sadness and anger Naming the things that can come in the way of a discussion, before the discussion happens Realising racial bias Transformation comes after a moment of realization The idea of "whiteness being normal" Books to read to gain an understanding of racial injustice Disunity in Christ Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?: And Other Conversations About Race How to look for opportunities to talk with others about topics of racial injustice Check out "Be the Bridge" The white confessional being a shortcut to true reconciliation Skipping the confessional story and moving straight to the action step you'll take next What reconciliation means to her Racial justice and reconciliation Radical Reconciliation How reconciliation should revolutionize the relationships we have with each other The celebration of blackness that is throughout the book Cultural misappropriation Please Support The Show with a Donation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on The One You Feed we have Frank Turner. In honor of Frank's new record we are re-releasing one of Eric's favorite interviews. This was the 22nd interview of all time for The One You Feed. We will be back with a new episode next week. Frank was a singer in a hardcore band, Million Dead. When they broke up he started out on his own with an acoustic guitar. He has released five solo albums, two rarities compilation albums, one split album and five EPs. His seventh studio album Be More Kind was recently released In This Interview Frank and I Discuss… The One You Feed parable. The feeling that there is never enough time. The importance of friendship in feeding your good wolf. His role as a CALM Ambassador. Building a community around music. What punk rock meant to him as a kid. Staying connected to his values of openness and community as he gets more famous Music as a refuge for those that don’t fit in. Music that he turns to to feed his good wolf. Writing the press release for John K Samson’s latest record. The challenges of alcohol and drugs. Getting older and the changes in identity that come with that. His love of dogs and his amazing “dog policy” at shows His forthcoming record. Frank Turner Links Frank Turner Homepage Buy Frank Turner music on Amazon Frank Turner on Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices