Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

Note: This podcast is a part of the Healing Fundamentals series. The topics covered in this series move beyond the basics of tapping to understanding the healing process. By understanding these fundamentals you will be able to get more out of your tapping faster. Make sure you check out the whole series. A significant amount of my time tapping with clients is spent looking into the past. We identify and examine the past experiences and beliefs that have shaped the way that the subconscious influences present action. Tapping and EFT excel at this task! Human beings are not usually good at seeing the past clearly. We end up judging our past choices based on current beliefs. You have experienced this if you have ever thought, "I should have known better!" It is particularly hard because we find it almost impossible to remember what it is like to not know something. Once we have learned a lesson, it feels as if we have always known it. When we judge ourselves harshly in this way, it slows the healing process. This week I have a simple tapping process to help you to be gentler with your past self and past choices, which will speed the healing process. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

New York City is a wacky place. One of the things that I have encountered firsthand is how amazingly different the dating scene is here compared with other cities. First, there are millions of people, many of whom are single, which vastly increases the pool of potential dates. Second, everyone is very busy so dates can be short (and feel a bit rushed) because everyone seems to have less time. Third, because of the first two points, people move on to the next prospective suitor more quickly than I have experienced other places. Because of this I have met some fascinating and wonderful women, I have consumed lots of really good food and drink on these dates, and I have been on more first dates in my short time in NYC than most people go on in their entire life. In this process I've learned two major lessons that have impacted my entire life: Say yes more. Making sure your yes means yes and your no means no. Embracing these two lessons in all parts of life, not just dating, has made my life richer and my relationships stronger. In this episode I have included a tap-along audio for each lesson. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Note: This podcast is a part of the Fundamental Disposition series. The topics covered in this series move beyond the basics of tapping to understanding the healing process. By understanding these fundamentals you will be able to get more out of your tapping faster. Make sure you check out the whole series. Last week a client asked me, "Why do you make me tap on that phrase all the time? Is it something you see in me that makes you think we need to tap on it?" I reassured her that it had nothing to do with her in particular, but something I tapped on with all of my clients. And then, right on cue, two other clients this week asked me about the same tapping phrase! The phrase is: "I give myself permission to be easy and gentle with myself." This is the phrase my clients tend to resist the most AND I believe it is one of the most important topics for us to address with tapping. This week's podcast explores why it is so hard for us (me included) to tap on the idea of being gentle with ourselves and why it is important for us to do so. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Just because we have a to-do list filled with useful tasks doesn't mean that we will actually have a productive day. Sometimes we waste our time on tasks that aren't even on our list, or we complete tasks on our list that are not the most valuable ones. Being busy is not necessarily the same thing as being productive. Here is a simple tapping tool I use every morning to ensure that I actually do the tasks on my to-do list AND I do the most valuable ones. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Recently I was working with a client on the grief she was feeling at missing so many experiences she loves during quarantine. As we were debriefing after a round of tapping she said: "While we were tapping on the grief I noticed all of these other pools of grief that were inside me from the past. As we tapped it was almost as if the wall between those pools of grief broke, the grief combined, and they all released together." Even though this was the first time I had heard this experience described in this particular way, with pools of emotions connecting, the experience itself is common. When we experience an emotion it reminds us of the other times we have experienced that same emotion. If those past emotions are not fully processed, it can feel like we're being hit by a wave of past emotions all at once. In the moment, we may feel worse because the emotions are getting stronger, but in reality it is a great opportunity to heal. We can clear not only what we are feeling in the moment, but also unprocessed emotions from the past. In this week's podcast learn a simple five-step process to clear past emotions that bubble up during a tapping session. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The world is a very big place and when we think of how we can make an impact on the world and everything going on in it, we can feel awfully small. In reality, our small gestures and ways of being in the world and how we interact with others can have a significant impact. Recognizing that our choices do make a difference make those helpful choices easier. This tap-along will help you to be a peacemaker in your world, which will ripple outwards and make a bigger impact. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Most choices aren't black and white, so being of two minds is a common experience. There are pros and cons to both outcomes. On the finale of this season's Project Runway (US version), one of the contestants, Victoria Cocieru, was struggling with which direction to take with her designs. She said, "In my brain I have a thousand little brains and they are fighting with each other." I find that a very evocative way of thinking about the problem. This week's podcast explores and taps for struggling with being of two (or more) minds when trying to make decisions. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! [player] Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Most of us spend at least half of our day at work. Because work consumes so much of our time and attention, stress from the working day can easily spill over into the rest of our lives. This week's podcast provides a tool that will help you to leave work at work. This tool applies to all types of work, no matter how many hours you work, and whether you travel to a workplace or work from home. It takes less than three minutes to do and will not only ensure you leave work stress at work, but will also make it easier to return to work the next day. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Family is complicated. Because they are family we want what is best for them. But at the same time we put up with more from them than we'd put up with from others because they are family. We will allow our family to say and do things that we would not tolerate from anyone else in our lives. This can cause an internal conflict. How can we be a loving family member whilst at the same time not want to be around the person? This week's podcast explores and taps for: family relationships how to want what is best for them how to claim the space we need for our safety and well-being Even if you have a great relationship with your family, there will be some parts of the relationship you find frustrating. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the most difficult parts of the healing process is being able to forgive ourselves. It's common to believe that if we forgive ourselves, we are letting ourselves off the hook and failing to take responsibility for our past choices. Self-forgiveness is actually the opposite of this. Being able to move to a place of forgiveness means we are taking responsibility for the past and making sure it stays in the past. When we don't forgive, we're just reliving the past over and over again. This tap-along audio is a recording of one of my client sessions where we were tapping on the idea of self-forgiveness. I was given permission by my client to use this recording and I have also removed his voice from the audio. This will allow you to tap along as if I were tapping with you. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

These uncertain times mean that our emotional guidance system is on overdrive. It is working nonstop to keep us safe because it's dealing with the unknown. That means we're expending energy all day long in the background as our emotional system tries to protect us. It's like we are starting off every day paying a 20% emotion tax, meaning that we only have 80% of our usual reserves and resilience. This podcast explores: the impact of the 20% emotion tax how to structure your work and to-do lists accordingly what are reasonable expectations at this time how to tap to manage this situation I also share the tapping I have been doing first thing in the morning to get the most out of each day. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the most common issues I uncover in my client sessions is the feeling of not being worthy to be here. It's seldom the main issue my clients present when we start working together, but as we work we find instances from their past where they felt dismissed or ignored by the people who were important to them. This creates a feeling of not believing you are worthy to be here at this moment. Here is a simple tap-along that will help you to recognize that you are worthy and valuable! You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The most primitive part of our emotional guidance system is our fear response. Fear's primary goal is to keep us from dying. I know that sounds like an overstatement, but this is exactly how it functions. Of course it's good that part of our internal guidance is on alert and doesn't want us to die, but in the modern word just because we fear something doesn't mean there are fatal consequences. Because of this, our fear can often get out of proportion. When we are acting out of fear we don't make the best choices. Sometimes we just freeze and don't do anything at all. At the same time, we don't want to be so casual that we become careless. When I am in a pressured situation my goal is to move from fear to urgency. When I am feeling a sense of urgency I understand that I need to act decisively. While fear makes us feel stuck, urgency gives us focused energy to take action. Here is a simple tap-along to help move you from a state of fear to one of urgency. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

While past choices may have contributed to your present, they do not mean that what comes next is predetermined. It is all too easy to feel trapped by both past choices and your current situation BUT they do not define who we are or who we can choose to be. In this short tapping audio we place ourselves at a fresh starting point. This audio is lifted directly from a client session, with my client's permission. I have also edited out my client's voice so that you can tap along as if you are working one-on-one with me. This is the perfect type of audio to use to start your day! Try using it daily for a week or two and see what shifts you notice. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Grief is a much more common emotion than we might think. It is obvious that we feel grief when a loved one dies, or when an important relationship or job ends. In reality, grief shows up any time we experience a loss. This could be for an opportunity, an ability, or even something as simple as a predictable daily routine. For the large changes it is easy to recognize grief. For smaller changes it is much harder. We often dismiss the feelings of grief as agitation, tiredness, or just being off kilter. As our daily lives have changed so radically with the COVID-19 pandemic, it's likely that we are feeling much more grief than we realize. Last year I interviewed Lynne Staley, an expert on grief, on how to identify grief and I think that now would be a great time to revisit that podcast. Use this week's simple tap-along audio and script to help you deal with the grief you are feeling right for your loss of normalcy. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When I was younger I had a hard time accepting the idea that God could love me unconditionally. I believed that I had to earn God's unconditional love. Meaning that I wasn't understanding that unconditional means unconditional, aka it doesn't have to be earned! Here's an audio from a client session where we tapped for accepting unconditional love. My client gave me permission to use this recording and I have removed his voice so you can tap along as if you were tapping one-on-one with me. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Sometimes we find inspiration in the strangest places. A few weeks ago I attended the On Air Fest, an event for podcast creators and podcast fans. One of my favorite presentations was given by Shima Oliaee who was one of the producers for Dolly Parton's America. During the presentation Shima shared a number of lessons she learned from interviewing Dolly and working on the project. Dolly is clearly a woman who feels deeply. When talking about how she deals with positive and negative emotions she said, "When I feel an emotion I am fully committed to it." This week's podcast explores what being "fully committed" to our emotions means and how we can use this idea to get more out of our tapping. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Our initial emotional response to a major crisis like the COVID-19 pandemic is with feelings of shock, worry, and overwhelm. At a certain point, the initial shock wears off and we move on to what I call second wave emotions that arise as we contemplate what is next and the future. Here are 7 tap-along audios for second wave emotions. They are: Going stir-crazy (4:42) Not having any personal space (7:44) Feeling isolated and alone (10:40) Mourning the loss of many activities we love (14:52) Not feeling motivated to do anything (18:24) Frustrated with all the extra steps we have added to our daily routine (23:06) Tired of everyone only wanting to talk about COVID-19 (26:33) If you'd like to jump to the tapping for one particular issue listed, you can go directly to that section by using the timestamp above. For example, if you wanted to tap for the second issue, not having any personal space, you would find it at 7 minutes and 44 seconds in the player below. Make sure you check out the full list of tapping resources from around the web, which is being updated all the time. Currently I am adding many resources for second wave emotions. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

After sharing 40 minutes of tapping on Friday I asked my listeners and readers what other topics would be useful for me to cover. In today's new audio we tap for the following topics: Fear of the unknown (4:13) Fear about how long this will last (7:24) Fear for our most vulnerable loved ones (10:24) Feeling like life is out of control (13:17) Sorrow over the loss of normalcy (17:04) The physical and emotional fatigue from the constant worry (21:35) Worry about not having enough supplies (25:43) Negative thoughts that are distracting us from our work and our creativity (29:37) If you'd like to jump to the tapping for one particular issue listed, you can go directly to that section by using the timestamp above. For example, if you wanted to tap for the second issue, fear about how long this will last, you would find it at 7 minutes and 24 seconds in the player below. Make sure you check out the full list of tapping resources from around the web. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

You might not know that I am the lead coach in a program called the Transformational BizClub (BizClub for short) which is a program run by my friend Pamela Bruner. The BizClub is setup to help business owners grow their business through strategic help and mindset work (lots of tapping). Friday morning in our Facebook group there were a number of members who were, rightly, sharing their concerns about what is going on in the world and with their businesses. I asked Pamela if it was okay if we did a bonus group call Friday afternoon to do some tapping. That is exactly what we did. AND I asked Pamela if it was alright if I shared the audio with you. She immediately said "Yes!" We tapped on: Worry about our personal health Worry about our loved ones health Being overwhelmed by the news Thinking about doing work is being insensitive to others Thinking that our work and day to day is unimportant in troubled times Not knowing what to do because our plans have had to change Trying to be thoughtful without making everything into a catastrophe Having to deal with the overwhelming fear of others It is close to 40 minutes of tapping. The audio is from a Zoom recording so it doesn't sound like the normal podcast, but it is still a great tool for you to tap along to. For more information about the BizClub visit http://coachwithpamela.com Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

At the time of the recording of this podcast the COVID-19 virus is starting to impact daily life around the world. The number of cases is spreading. Sporting events are being canceled. People are being encouraged not to travel. Because of the constant stream of news and information on our social media feeds, it is easy to feel panicked. This panic is rooted in two factors. The first is the fear about getting sick. The second is the fear caused by knowing we can't do anything about the big picture problem. It's as if it is something that is slowly creeping towards us and we are powerless to stop it. This week I have for you a simple tap-along audio and script to help you to feel calm in the face of a global problem that we don't feel like we can do anything about. [Note: Here is a tap-along audio and script to help you to stay healthy. If you are feeling sick, make sure you reach out to your primary care provider. Tapping is a great tool to augment and support your health, but should not be the only tool you use.] You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The most common question I hear about tapping is "Will tapping work for [insert issue]?" The second most common question is "What are the right tapping phrases to use for [insert issue]?" I understand why that question is so often asked. In most tapping trainings you are taught that your tapping phrases need to be as specific as possible to get the most out of tapping. This concern is compounded when you hear an experienced tapper effortlessly come up with what seem to be the perfect phrases. In reality, there is no such thing as the "exactly right words" to tap along to. The words themself aren't magic. In this short audio I explain how best to approach the words and phrases that you can tap to AND the most effective way to come up with the perfect phrases for you. The good news is that it's much easier than you would think. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Pride is on the list of the seven deadly sins and whether explicitly and implicitly, our culture discourages us from displaying pride or egotism. Instead, we are taught to do our work and keep our heads down. It is true that some people have outsized egos that cause them (and others) problems, but just because there are egomaniacs in the world doesn't mean that we shouldn't feel pride. Feeling a sense of pride in our work and our capabilities is healthy. It helps us to stay motivated and continue to do good work and it allows others to see what we can do, what is possible and how we can help them. Tap along with this week's podcast to cultivate a healthy sense of pride in who you are, what you can do, and what you have accomplished. [Note: Here is the youtube video for K-OS's song Crabbuckit which is referenced in the podcast] You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Multiple studies have shown that stating clear goals makes it more likely that we will be successful. They help us to stay on track and maintain our focus. But simply having goals is not enough. At one extreme it is easy to become disconnected from our goals because they are too abstract. At the other, we can find ourselves in a situation where we are so focused on our exact goals that we miss other opportunities. This week's podcast explores the one simple idea that you can add to any named goals that will increase your likelihood of success AND in many cases in a much easier way than planned. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the keys to effective tapping is having an emotion to tap for, but sometimes we aren't able to feel anything deeply. We may feel numb or ambivalent and even though these two experiences are not the same, they have much in common. This week's podcast will give you strategies for tapping when you find yourself in a state where you feel disconnected from your emotions. It includes two separate tap-alongs for each of these sensations. You can find both tapping scripts as downloadable pdfs over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the most difficult ideas that my clients wrestle with is that of forgiveness and I have found that they often lack a clear understanding of what forgiveness is and what it is not. When we forgive someone else it can feel like we are saying it is okay, that they don't have to take responsibility for their actions, or that they are allowed to hurt us again. This is NOT what forgiveness is! Instead forgiveness is the process of choosing no longer to be stuck in the past emotionally. In this episode I define what I understand forgiveness is and what it is not. This will help you to embrace forgiveness in a healthier way. I also demonstrate how I tap for this idea of forgiveness to make it even easier to integrate. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The tool that I use the most often from my hypnosis training while doing tapping and EFT is metaphor. The subconscious mind often works in imagery as a way of presenting struggle, trauma, and limiting beliefs. Since this is the language of the subconscious mind, it makes sense that when we are doing work on this level that we would use metaphor as well. In this episode I share with you: How I understand metaphor How our subconscious mind uses it How we can use metaphor to create faster transformation How to integrate it into tapping I have also included some of my favorite metaphors to use when doing inner child work. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The majority of the issues that I work on with my clients have something to do with the people in their lives. Sometimes the issue concerns someone we interact with now, and at other times it is about the limiting beliefs people have given us in the past. The struggle with issues that have to do with someone else is that we can't change another person and we can't take responsibility for their transformation. And even if someone else wanted us to take on their transformation and we were willing to do so, it can't be done. To that end I have created a tool called Talk About, Talk To, Talk As If. It is a framework for tapping that allows us to look at a relationship from three different vantage points, giving us the ability to tap on any issue from each of these points of view. Two important notes: First, I think this tool is so powerful and useful that it's the very first tool I teach people after I have taught them the basics of tapping. Second, this is also the tool I teach people when they ask about surrogate tapping. It is not surrogate tapping, but understanding this tool will help you to understand my approach to surrogate tapping. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When I am asking my clients why they have made certain past choices, they often say something like, "I don't know. I just had this gut feeling." OR "I just had this sense of intuition that it was the right thing to do." I know exactly what this sensation feels like because I experience it all the time when I am working with clients and also when I am making decisions about my life. But I don't believe in intuition – well, at least not in the way most people understand it. When we define our intuition as something mysterious or magical that's somehow beyond our understanding, I believe we undermine what is really happening and prevent ourselves from getting the most out of these feelings. This week I share with you: What I believe intuition actually is How to get the most out of it How to cultivate it so that is even more powerful I realize that I am flying in the face of convention on this one and I'd love to hear your thoughts on my interpretation of intuition in the comments below. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

[Note: This is part 10 of a 10-part series on using EFT/Tapping for weight release with a new article or podcast being added every 10 days. The complete series can be found @ weight release series.] Tapping can be used to help manage the functions and systems of our bodies where our systems can often be over- or under-functioning. Here is a great little tool I use to help tune into the body to gain a sense of how it is working and how we can tap to improve its function. It is called a scoreboard. In this audio I demonstrate the tool using the example of metabolic function, but the same technique can be used for any of the body's functions or systems. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

I have always found the law of attraction's teaching of "visualizing a positive outcome and somehow the universe will just magically make it happen" a little suspect. My doubt was a prompt for me to do some research and when looking into visualizing an outcome without action, this is what I found: During the course of four experiments, Kappes and Oettingen demonstrated that conjuring positive fantasies of success drains the energy out of ambition. When we imagine having reached what we want, our brains fall for the trick. Instead of mustering more energy to get "there", we inadvertently trigger a relaxation response that mimics how we would feel if we'd actually reached the goal. Physiologically, we slide into our comfy shoes; blood pressure lowers, heart rate decreases, all is well in the success world of our mind's making. The research also uncovers that the more pressing the need to succeed, the more deflating positive visualization becomes. via Forbes.com This is not to say that visualization doesn't have its place. It can be a useful tool that can become even more powerful when combined with tapping. This week I share four ways in which you can use visualization to supercharge your tapping (and vice versa). Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the great things about tapping is that we can jump right into doing work any time and anywhere. Even though we can start a tapping session without any preparation, I have found that if we give some thought to how we begin a session, then we will get more out of it. Here are five easy things to do at the beginning of a tapping session to make sure that you are grounded in your body and in the moment AND that you are fully present to the work you are going to do. You don't have to do all five, so you can mix and match to the ones that make the most sense to you. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When we sit down to tap we are doing it because we want to feel better. It is easy to fall into the trap of feeling like the only way our tapping will be successful is if we feel absolutely wonderful when we have finished. In truth, that isn't always possible but there are many times when we can gain relief without achieving total relief. If we set the standard for tapping that it is only successful if we gain total relief and we only have partial relief, then we will be disappointed with our tapping even though we feel better. In this podcast I talk about a simple four-step process that you can use to get the most out of your tapping and feel satisfied with your results. Using a process like this means you will get more out of an individual tapping sessions, have a better sense of your transformation, and feel encouraged to tap again in the future. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

There is an interesting phenomenon that crops up as we become more experienced tappers and more experienced with healing and change work. We start to recognize what is possible with healing! There are two sides to this. On one hand we can become excited about having such useful tools, while on the other hand it can feel daunting to recognize how much we actually have to do. Feeling daunted can prevent us from wanting to tap because it feels like we have too much to do and it's too big a task even to begin. The good news is we don't have to do all the work at once AND even only doing a small amount of work on a big issue can make a useful difference in how we feel. This week I share a simple tap-along to help you to start the healing process when it feels too big. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

If you have ever worked with me one-on-one or listened to an audio of me working with a client, then you know I spend a lot of time asking different parts of your body for feedback. I regularly have my clients ask questions of the physical sensations they are feeling. That is not a metaphor for something else. I really have them ask questions of the physical sensations they are experiencing (like tightness in the chest that comes up with worry) as if the sensations can talk back. Moving the focus to bodily sensations helps clients to get out of their conscious minds. The conscious mind can be inaccurate when it is trying to understand why we are the way we are. It can make an educated guess, but sometimes that is inaccurate. Pretending that a physical sensation can talk back to us gives the subconscious mind an opportunity to share information it has about the issue we want to address with tapping. Based on the success of this type of work, I have a tool that you can use at the start of the day to set you up for a successful day. The tool combines this type of questioning within a framework of thinking of the body as a factory. I know this sounds odd, but it is a powerful tool that I use regularly. And I know that if you give it a try, you will be thrilled with the outcome. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When I am working with clients I pay particular attention to the words they use to describe what they are experiencing. That's because more often than not our emotional response is informed by how we describe what is going on, rather than what is actually going on. To that end I have created a number of resources to help you decode the language you (or your clients) are using. In this audio, you will hear me working with one of my clients as we discuss the difference between and "fix" and "transform" and how each of those words impacts the healing process. An audio transcript can be found below the player. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora Sue: Could you repeat that thought again? That was really profound…the difference between fix and transform. Gene: We so often say "I need to fix something" and for anything that we wish to "fix" we're implying a sense of brokenness. It becomes a state that we're in that can have a lot of negative charge around it. The first time the power of words in healing was pointed out to me was by my friend Dan Cleary. Something had come up when we were supposed to do an interview, so I had to reschedule. I sent him a note saying "I'm sorry". He replied saying "Don't say you're sorry! That's a really profound statement because it's not an apology. It's a statement of the type of thing that I am, "'Oh that poor, sorry Gene.'" Being able to recognize I apologize for what happened and it won't happen again is really different from saying "I'm sorry". When we look at the work we need to do in terms of fixing something about ourselves, or the environment, or the world, it automatically implies something's broken. Things aren't necessarily broken. They may not be functioning optimally and they might not be functioning in a way that's healthy and beneficial in the short and long term, but everything we do is functional even if it is not achieving the function that we desire. I have found it more useful in my own work to think in terms of transformation. I want to transform this from the way it's functioning now to a healthier way, both in the short and long term, so it makes it easier for me to approach the work I need to do. It helps me to shape my mind so I approach it with a better attitude to ensure that I'm doing better work for myself. Sue: It also sounds more open-ended. When you fix something it feels like you have a definite aim in mind, whereas transformation has a sense of allowing and expansiveness. Gene: Absolutely. Anytime we are thinking of fixing or broken, we immediately make problems binary. By binary I mean on or off, it's there or it's not. And many situations are more complex than that, they aren't just on or off. For example, it's not that I don't feel pain OR I do feel pain. There are gradations of pain and those gradations of pain impact the way I interact in the world. If I have a pain that's a 9 on a scale of 0-10, and I move the pain down to a 6 but my goal is to get rid of the pain, then I have failed. Even though I feel better, I am still hurt. Moving from a 9 to a 6 on the SUDs scale doesn't mean I have achieved a complete transformation. That is, my pain is not fixed, BUT that reduction might allow me to leave the house for two hours, which I couldn't do before because I have restored full mobility. That's a big difference and real success. Yes, I still feel pain but I'm able to do things I couldn't do before. I am moving away from this sense of one way or another, with no shades of grey. Transformation helps us to understand that there are grades of experience, rather than I have them or I don't. For many of the things I want to improve in my life I might not ever reach perfection, and if I'm only satisfied with perfect, then I'll never feel satisfied. Sue: Wow, that kind of goes along with your "is there something better to..." Gene: Absolutely yeah, the other part of it is when we make it binary we limit our possibilities and we could actually have something better than whatever we think "fixed" is.

Recently I was working with a client who was frustrated with the process of tapping. He felt angry. The process went like this: he felt angry he tapped for the anger he felt better some time would pass he felt angry again Dealing with the same issue over and over again had him feeling incredibly frustrated. As we did some work, it emerged that his anger was a symptom of a much deeper issue. The tapping for the anger was helpful in the short term, but since it wasn't the core issue, it kept coming back again and again. In my client's case, his anger was like a notification light on the dashboard of a car where the problem isn't the red light itself, but the light is pointing out the actual problem. For him, tapping for the anger was no different than turning off the red notification light. It wasn't responding to the problem. Identifying if what you are tapping on is the core issue or just a symptom can be tricky. Here are eight questions that you can ask while tapping to help you to go past the symptoms and reach the core issue. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

We know that the most effective way to tap is when we are able to be as specific as possible with the issue at hand. But a common misconception about this idea is that tapping is only useful if we are specific. But that is not what the statement above says. It says "as specific as possible". There are times when we can't be super specific because what we are feeling isn't super specific! Sometimes our experience is a collection of emotions and feelings that are much more general OR we are processing so much at once we can't be specific about any one issue or aspect. When that happens I use what I call the Container Process. It's a tool I regularly use with my clients. It is perfect for: when you are experiencing lots of emotions at once when you can't pin down exactly what you want to tap on letting go of everything at the end of the day Also, you will be able to master the process after hearing it just two or three times so you won't need the audio if you want to do it on your own. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify |

Working with clients has allowed me to understand a fundamental of human nature: All the choices we make are functional choices. In practical terms this means that all of the choices we make are the best choices that we can make in any given moment based on the information we have and our current resource state. This does not mean that we always make good choices, choices we are proud of, or choices that we would like to make again in the future. Instead it means that we are making choices for a reason. When we are able to recognize the emotional and intellectual reasons behind our choices, it highlights the areas we can address with tapping so that we can make better choices in the future. In this podcast I share how you can understand why on a subconscious level we are making "functional" choices AND how we can make better choices in the future. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Recently I was working with a client on using tapping to help him to go after some major goals in his life. He didn't need to address a particular issue, but instead he was looking for a good way to set himself up to pursue his goals. After we had done a few minutes of tapping, he felt at peace and was ready to pursue his goals for the day and in the long-term. He then said to me, "You need to share this as a podcast. Others will find it super helpful." So here it is! The audio is less than seven minutes long and I hope it also helps you to go after your goals today. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

We all know that New Year's Resolutions don't work. It would be nice to believe that making a statement at midnight on December 31st would be enough to create new ways of thinking and acting. It doesn't work that way. With that being said, the new year is a great time to reevaluate the lives we want to be living AND tapping is a great way to support these new goals. This week I have a simple tap-along audio that will help you to create lasting change, not just a fleeting thought at the beginning of the year which evaporates quickly. This will not only help you to take new action, but also help you with the emotional ups and downs of trying to live out a new goal. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It seems like every client I've worked with in the last ten days has asked me about using tapping to help them to sleep better. Daily stress is a common cause of sleep disruption because our systems can get caught up in trying to solve the problems of the previous day and consumed with the worries of tomorrow. In this simple tap-along audio we spend time on physical and mental fatigue, as well as emotional exhaustion, and work on preparing the system for a great night of rest and relaxation. Let me know in the comments section below if this helps you out. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! Even though we spend most of our time tapping to try to reduce emotions, emotions are not our enemy. Our emotional response is our internal guidance system trying to keep us safe and on track. Fear is an extremely helpful emotion in that it helps us to see danger BUT problems arise if our fear response is excessive and causes us to go into a state of flight, fight, freeze, or fog. When this happens, the fear moves from pointing out a problem, to crippling us. Even when we notice that we are feeling fearful, it can be difficult to leave that state because our system thinks this is the best way to keep us on guard. Today we are going to tap for neutralizing our fear and moving to a more useful state of focus and urgency. By having a proper sense of urgency we can stay on task without being crippled by fear. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

This is really embarrassing, but it's a true story. I live in New York City, a pedestrian city where most people don't drive. Even when you take mass transit you still need to walk a lot just to get around. The subway stop I use most is 3/4 of a mile walk from my apartment. As a result, people here tend to be healthier than the national average because of the daily walking they're required to do, so I see far fewer obese people in NYC than I do in other parts of the United States. Back in 2014 when this was originally recorded, I was in a rural part of the US. As we were entering a restaurant there was a group of people walking out. Two members of the group leaving the restaurant were obese; they were so big it was hard for them to walk. And this is the really embarrassing part…when I saw them my first thought and emotion was one of disgust. It washed over my whole body so intensely that I felt sick to my stomach for a second. The second emotion was of total shame for being disgusted. I was, and am, so disappointed in myself. When something like this happens, our emotional response is about us. It is about how we see ourselves, the world, and what we think is safe. My feelings of disgust had little to do with the people I saw and everything to do with how I see myself. In this recording you will hear me tap in real time for the feelings of disgust I experienced, the shame that soon followed, and all the issues that came up as I found my way to the root causes of those feelings. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

On a recent episode of the Judge John Hodgman podcast, one of the litigants (when talking about her husband) said "I want him to have what he wants. I just want him to want something different." That is such a relatable sentiment. Sometimes we believe we can see the best path for our loved ones, but at the exact same time we want them to be in control of their own lives and choices. This week we talk about and tap about how to come to terms with wanting the best for others when they are making choices that we might not love. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When we are wanting to take action, it is very easy for us to be stuck because of worry. Worry is nothing more than a part of us trying to keep us safe by keeping an eye out for everything that could possibly go wrong. The problem is that the part of us that worries, often worries way too much. The size of the concern for our safety doesn't match the size of any potential danger. This week I have a simple question you can ask when facing self-sabotage and resistance to taking action. If you ask this question and tap with the answer, you will clear resistance and be able to take action quickly. What are you waiting for?! Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

My clients tell me all the time: "This is so frustrating! I feel like I am dealing with the same issue over and over again. When am I going to get past this!?!" I can appreciate their frustration. We want to feel like the time we are spending on our transformation is fruitful. We want to move in a positive direction as we continue to do the work. In reality, we aren't dealing with the same issue over and over again but dealing with different issues that feel the same. This week I explore why it feels like you are repeatedly dealing with the same issue, why you aren't, and what is actually going on in the healing process. Understanding this framework will make it easier to keep moving forward. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

There is this interesting phenomenon where the more we hear something, the more likely we are to believe it. It has nothing to do with the validity of the claim. The simple repetition of a statement somehow lends it credibility in our minds. A perfect example of this is in the shape of a question I often receive from my readers. It goes something like this: I really love your tapping scripts, but I am worried because you use the word 'not' all the time. I know the subconscious mind doesn't hear the word not. When you have us tap on "I am not going to be anxious" you are really tapping on "I am going to be anxious." Aren't you worried that you are tapping in something negative? If you have ever worried about saying the word 'not' when tapping, then you need to listen to this podcast. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It is good that we are thankful for what we have in our lives. Expressing gratitude helps us to be appreciative, grounded, and there are even health benefits to being thankful. The problem is that on a subconscious level we may feel that wanting more means do not appreciate what we already have, and that can prevent us from moving forward. This week I have a short tap-along audio and script to help you to be thankful AND move forward at the same time. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Every time we make a choice we are limiting our future options. That is the simple reality of choice. If I choose to study literature at university, I am limiting my ability to become a medical doctor. If I choose to go to Norway on vacation, that limits my ability to go to Japan this year. I have time for one movie tonight, so if I choose "Rear Window" I can't watch "Strangers On A Train". Recognizing that one choice can limit our future choices can hold us back from taking action because we don't want to miss out. In the end we choose to do nothing, which is a choice in itself. In this short audio I share a few easy ways to approach making choices so that we don't get stuck by choosing to do nothing at all. There is also a short tap-along audio to help clear the resistance to making choices. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora