Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

If you have ever worked with me one-on-one or listened to an audio of me working with a client, then you know I spend a lot of time asking different parts of your body for feedback. I regularly have my clients ask questions of the physical sensations they are feeling. That is not a metaphor for something else. I really have them ask questions of the physical sensations they are experiencing (like tightness in the chest that comes up with worry) as if the sensations can talk back. Moving the focus to bodily sensations helps clients to get out of their conscious minds. The conscious mind can be inaccurate when it is trying to understand why we are the way we are. It can make an educated guess, but sometimes that is inaccurate. Pretending that a physical sensation can talk back to us gives the subconscious mind an opportunity to share information it has about the issue we want to address with tapping. Based on the success of this type of work, I have a tool that you can use at the start of the day to set you up for a successful day. The tool combines this type of questioning within a framework of thinking of the body as a factory. I know this sounds odd, but it is a powerful tool that I use regularly. And I know that if you give it a try, you will be thrilled with the outcome. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When I am working with clients I pay particular attention to the words they use to describe what they are experiencing. That's because more often than not our emotional response is informed by how we describe what is going on, rather than what is actually going on. To that end I have created a number of resources to help you decode the language you (or your clients) are using. In this audio, you will hear me working with one of my clients as we discuss the difference between and "fix" and "transform" and how each of those words impacts the healing process. An audio transcript can be found below the player. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora Sue: Could you repeat that thought again? That was really profound…the difference between fix and transform. Gene: We so often say "I need to fix something" and for anything that we wish to "fix" we're implying a sense of brokenness. It becomes a state that we're in that can have a lot of negative charge around it. The first time the power of words in healing was pointed out to me was by my friend Dan Cleary. Something had come up when we were supposed to do an interview, so I had to reschedule. I sent him a note saying "I'm sorry". He replied saying "Don't say you're sorry! That's a really profound statement because it's not an apology. It's a statement of the type of thing that I am, "'Oh that poor, sorry Gene.'" Being able to recognize I apologize for what happened and it won't happen again is really different from saying "I'm sorry". When we look at the work we need to do in terms of fixing something about ourselves, or the environment, or the world, it automatically implies something's broken. Things aren't necessarily broken. They may not be functioning optimally and they might not be functioning in a way that's healthy and beneficial in the short and long term, but everything we do is functional even if it is not achieving the function that we desire. I have found it more useful in my own work to think in terms of transformation. I want to transform this from the way it's functioning now to a healthier way, both in the short and long term, so it makes it easier for me to approach the work I need to do. It helps me to shape my mind so I approach it with a better attitude to ensure that I'm doing better work for myself. Sue: It also sounds more open-ended. When you fix something it feels like you have a definite aim in mind, whereas transformation has a sense of allowing and expansiveness. Gene: Absolutely. Anytime we are thinking of fixing or broken, we immediately make problems binary. By binary I mean on or off, it's there or it's not. And many situations are more complex than that, they aren't just on or off. For example, it's not that I don't feel pain OR I do feel pain. There are gradations of pain and those gradations of pain impact the way I interact in the world. If I have a pain that's a 9 on a scale of 0-10, and I move the pain down to a 6 but my goal is to get rid of the pain, then I have failed. Even though I feel better, I am still hurt. Moving from a 9 to a 6 on the SUDs scale doesn't mean I have achieved a complete transformation. That is, my pain is not fixed, BUT that reduction might allow me to leave the house for two hours, which I couldn't do before because I have restored full mobility. That's a big difference and real success. Yes, I still feel pain but I'm able to do things I couldn't do before. I am moving away from this sense of one way or another, with no shades of grey. Transformation helps us to understand that there are grades of experience, rather than I have them or I don't. For many of the things I want to improve in my life I might not ever reach perfection, and if I'm only satisfied with perfect, then I'll never feel satisfied. Sue: Wow, that kind of goes along with your "is there something better to..." Gene: Absolutely yeah, the other part of it is when we make it binary we limit our possibilities and we could actually have something better than whatever we think "fixed" is.

Recently I was working with a client who was frustrated with the process of tapping. He felt angry. The process went like this: he felt angry he tapped for the anger he felt better some time would pass he felt angry again Dealing with the same issue over and over again had him feeling incredibly frustrated. As we did some work, it emerged that his anger was a symptom of a much deeper issue. The tapping for the anger was helpful in the short term, but since it wasn't the core issue, it kept coming back again and again. In my client's case, his anger was like a notification light on the dashboard of a car where the problem isn't the red light itself, but the light is pointing out the actual problem. For him, tapping for the anger was no different than turning off the red notification light. It wasn't responding to the problem. Identifying if what you are tapping on is the core issue or just a symptom can be tricky. Here are eight questions that you can ask while tapping to help you to go past the symptoms and reach the core issue. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

We know that the most effective way to tap is when we are able to be as specific as possible with the issue at hand. But a common misconception about this idea is that tapping is only useful if we are specific. But that is not what the statement above says. It says "as specific as possible". There are times when we can't be super specific because what we are feeling isn't super specific! Sometimes our experience is a collection of emotions and feelings that are much more general OR we are processing so much at once we can't be specific about any one issue or aspect. When that happens I use what I call the Container Process. It's a tool I regularly use with my clients. It is perfect for: when you are experiencing lots of emotions at once when you can't pin down exactly what you want to tap on letting go of everything at the end of the day Also, you will be able to master the process after hearing it just two or three times so you won't need the audio if you want to do it on your own. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify |

Working with clients has allowed me to understand a fundamental of human nature: All the choices we make are functional choices. In practical terms this means that all of the choices we make are the best choices that we can make in any given moment based on the information we have and our current resource state. This does not mean that we always make good choices, choices we are proud of, or choices that we would like to make again in the future. Instead it means that we are making choices for a reason. When we are able to recognize the emotional and intellectual reasons behind our choices, it highlights the areas we can address with tapping so that we can make better choices in the future. In this podcast I share how you can understand why on a subconscious level we are making "functional" choices AND how we can make better choices in the future. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Recently I was working with a client on using tapping to help him to go after some major goals in his life. He didn't need to address a particular issue, but instead he was looking for a good way to set himself up to pursue his goals. After we had done a few minutes of tapping, he felt at peace and was ready to pursue his goals for the day and in the long-term. He then said to me, "You need to share this as a podcast. Others will find it super helpful." So here it is! The audio is less than seven minutes long and I hope it also helps you to go after your goals today. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

We all know that New Year's Resolutions don't work. It would be nice to believe that making a statement at midnight on December 31st would be enough to create new ways of thinking and acting. It doesn't work that way. With that being said, the new year is a great time to reevaluate the lives we want to be living AND tapping is a great way to support these new goals. This week I have a simple tap-along audio that will help you to create lasting change, not just a fleeting thought at the beginning of the year which evaporates quickly. This will not only help you to take new action, but also help you with the emotional ups and downs of trying to live out a new goal. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It seems like every client I've worked with in the last ten days has asked me about using tapping to help them to sleep better. Daily stress is a common cause of sleep disruption because our systems can get caught up in trying to solve the problems of the previous day and consumed with the worries of tomorrow. In this simple tap-along audio we spend time on physical and mental fatigue, as well as emotional exhaustion, and work on preparing the system for a great night of rest and relaxation. Let me know in the comments section below if this helps you out. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! Even though we spend most of our time tapping to try to reduce emotions, emotions are not our enemy. Our emotional response is our internal guidance system trying to keep us safe and on track. Fear is an extremely helpful emotion in that it helps us to see danger BUT problems arise if our fear response is excessive and causes us to go into a state of flight, fight, freeze, or fog. When this happens, the fear moves from pointing out a problem, to crippling us. Even when we notice that we are feeling fearful, it can be difficult to leave that state because our system thinks this is the best way to keep us on guard. Today we are going to tap for neutralizing our fear and moving to a more useful state of focus and urgency. By having a proper sense of urgency we can stay on task without being crippled by fear. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

This is really embarrassing, but it's a true story. I live in New York City, a pedestrian city where most people don't drive. Even when you take mass transit you still need to walk a lot just to get around. The subway stop I use most is 3/4 of a mile walk from my apartment. As a result, people here tend to be healthier than the national average because of the daily walking they're required to do, so I see far fewer obese people in NYC than I do in other parts of the United States. Back in 2014 when this was originally recorded, I was in a rural part of the US. As we were entering a restaurant there was a group of people walking out. Two members of the group leaving the restaurant were obese; they were so big it was hard for them to walk. And this is the really embarrassing part…when I saw them my first thought and emotion was one of disgust. It washed over my whole body so intensely that I felt sick to my stomach for a second. The second emotion was of total shame for being disgusted. I was, and am, so disappointed in myself. When something like this happens, our emotional response is about us. It is about how we see ourselves, the world, and what we think is safe. My feelings of disgust had little to do with the people I saw and everything to do with how I see myself. In this recording you will hear me tap in real time for the feelings of disgust I experienced, the shame that soon followed, and all the issues that came up as I found my way to the root causes of those feelings. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

On a recent episode of the Judge John Hodgman podcast, one of the litigants (when talking about her husband) said "I want him to have what he wants. I just want him to want something different." That is such a relatable sentiment. Sometimes we believe we can see the best path for our loved ones, but at the exact same time we want them to be in control of their own lives and choices. This week we talk about and tap about how to come to terms with wanting the best for others when they are making choices that we might not love. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When we are wanting to take action, it is very easy for us to be stuck because of worry. Worry is nothing more than a part of us trying to keep us safe by keeping an eye out for everything that could possibly go wrong. The problem is that the part of us that worries, often worries way too much. The size of the concern for our safety doesn't match the size of any potential danger. This week I have a simple question you can ask when facing self-sabotage and resistance to taking action. If you ask this question and tap with the answer, you will clear resistance and be able to take action quickly. What are you waiting for?! Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

My clients tell me all the time: "This is so frustrating! I feel like I am dealing with the same issue over and over again. When am I going to get past this!?!" I can appreciate their frustration. We want to feel like the time we are spending on our transformation is fruitful. We want to move in a positive direction as we continue to do the work. In reality, we aren't dealing with the same issue over and over again but dealing with different issues that feel the same. This week I explore why it feels like you are repeatedly dealing with the same issue, why you aren't, and what is actually going on in the healing process. Understanding this framework will make it easier to keep moving forward. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

There is this interesting phenomenon where the more we hear something, the more likely we are to believe it. It has nothing to do with the validity of the claim. The simple repetition of a statement somehow lends it credibility in our minds. A perfect example of this is in the shape of a question I often receive from my readers. It goes something like this: I really love your tapping scripts, but I am worried because you use the word 'not' all the time. I know the subconscious mind doesn't hear the word not. When you have us tap on "I am not going to be anxious" you are really tapping on "I am going to be anxious." Aren't you worried that you are tapping in something negative? If you have ever worried about saying the word 'not' when tapping, then you need to listen to this podcast. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It is good that we are thankful for what we have in our lives. Expressing gratitude helps us to be appreciative, grounded, and there are even health benefits to being thankful. The problem is that on a subconscious level we may feel that wanting more means do not appreciate what we already have, and that can prevent us from moving forward. This week I have a short tap-along audio and script to help you to be thankful AND move forward at the same time. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Every time we make a choice we are limiting our future options. That is the simple reality of choice. If I choose to study literature at university, I am limiting my ability to become a medical doctor. If I choose to go to Norway on vacation, that limits my ability to go to Japan this year. I have time for one movie tonight, so if I choose "Rear Window" I can't watch "Strangers On A Train". Recognizing that one choice can limit our future choices can hold us back from taking action because we don't want to miss out. In the end we choose to do nothing, which is a choice in itself. In this short audio I share a few easy ways to approach making choices so that we don't get stuck by choosing to do nothing at all. There is also a short tap-along audio to help clear the resistance to making choices. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Many of my clients would identify as the 'black sheep' of their families or communities. Because they moved to the beat of their own drums, they were usually out of step with everyone else. This can be particularly difficult for youngsters to handle because it felt unsafe to express their true selves. In order to survive, it's human nature to develop tricks, tools, and techniques to get by. At the time they were the best (and often the only) way to get through those difficult times, but the tools that were helpful as children are not necessarily helpful as adults. The problem is that when we use certain tools and tactics for so long, they become ingrained and habitual. In this audio we talk about how to let go of these old tools in favour of new and better ways to manage our lives. In addition to the instruction in this podcast, there is a tap-along audio. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! One of my clients recently asked me, "What is the endgame to this tapping thing?" What he meant by the question is besides the constant improvement of our lives (which is no small thing), where does tapping lead us? What is the final goal? We usually think that we tap to feel better, and of course this is true, but there's more to it than just feeling better. In my mind, we tap for two main reasons. How we tap is impacted by these reasons and each has its own tapping approach. In this audio I explain the two reasons and how to best tap for them. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

There is no shortage of pain or struggle in the world. Because of this, at any given moment any number of our loved ones can be suffering in big and small ways. When our loved ones are in pain, we really want to ease their burden, but just because that is our intention doesn't mean that there are tangible actions we can take to be helpful. In this week's podcast I have a simple tap-along and script that you can use when your loved ones are struggling. I am not naive enough to believe that tapping for a struggling loved one will completely transform their world. I do know that if I take a few moments to tap for them, I will be more present to their difficulties, meaning I will be more thoughtful in the moment in how I respond. ALSO, I believe that spending a few moments thinking loving thoughts for a friend in pain is a good investment of my time. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

How we end a tapping session is sometimes more important than how we begin it. At the beginning it is most important that we simply start tapping. With each successive round of tapping, we gain clarity about the issue at hand and where we should focus our efforts. For me, there are two goals for the last little bit of tapping at the end of a session. First, I often feel a little groggy and fuzzy brained when I've been tapping for a while, which makes sense as tapping often releases a lot of stored emotion and memories. It is important that I'm able to return to my day feeling calm and grounded. Second, even though we have stopped tapping doesn't mean the process of healing and transformation has ended. The new thoughts and beliefs we've connected with are still integrating even after the tapping stops. At the end of the session, I find it useful to remind myself that the process of healing and transformation will continue after a session. This recognition encourages me to come back and tap again and again. By taking a few minutes to tap in this way, we can get the most out of our tapping sessions and also set ourselves up for success after the session. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

On October 20th I received the sad news that Dr. Pat Carrington had passed away the day before at the age of 95. In the tapping world Pat was best known for creating the Choices Method and was one of the Founding EFT Masters. On a personal level, she was an amazing champion of my work and I know I wouldn't have the career that I have today if it weren't for her public support. When someone we love and care about dies, it is emotionally hard. It is natural to feel grief and loss, but sometimes these emotions can be too much. This week I have for you a tap-along audio and tapping script to help in times of grief and loss. Learn more about Dr. Carrington's life and work You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! [player] Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Today it is commonly acknowledged that cultivating a sense of gratitude can be a powerful tool for helping us to live better and emotionally healthier lives. So much so that I even have clients who try to find their way to feeling a sense of gratitude when struggling with an emotional issue. My clients regularly tell me things like, "I spent some time this morning doing gratitude exercises to try to change my mindset." Unfortunately, simply saying that you feel thankful is not enough to turn around an emotional issue. In this week's podcast I share with you the difference between the feelings of gratitude and poverty. When I use the word "poverty" in this context I'm not talking specifically about a lack of money, but rather feeling like we don't have enough of anything. We can feel a poverty of support, opportunity, love, health, or just about anything else. When we understand the difference between the emotions of gratitude and poverty, we can use this understanding in our personal transformation work. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

On any given day there are more than a dozen stories in the news about what is happening to the Earth's environment. On one level it is good that we are better informed about what is going on in the world and how our choices impact our environment. But on another level it can feel overwhelming because the problem is so vast. When we don't see how we can make a difference, it is easy to become discouraged and hopeless. Even though the problem is big and the solutions are hard to come by, it doesn't mean it is hopeless. Here is the tapping I do to feel hopeful and encouraged to take whatever actions I can take. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

One of the most powerful tools in my own learning as a practitioner has been listening to other practitioners working with real clients on real issues. It is a great chance to see how a skilled practitioner takes concepts I understand intellectually and apply them in real world situations. In this unique audio you have the opportunity to hear me working one-on-one with a real client. As well as hearing me tap with my client, you'll hear my additional commentary explaining my choices and my thought process in the moment. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

For me, loneliness is one of the toughest emotions. The sense of disconnection that comes with feeling lonely almost feels like we are losing touch with our own humanity. That swirling black hole of emotion seems to keep pulling us in ever deeper. One of the hardest parts of loneliness is feeling it even when we are surrounded by others. Here is the tapping that I do when I feel lonely. You can find the full tapping script of this audio in pdf form over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It is no fun when we feel hurt by what someone else says or does. In many cases these hurtful words or actions are unintentional, and others may be completely unaware that they have hurt us. Even though it wasn't their intention to cause us pain, we feel hurt nonetheless. In this podcast we explore the best way to respond when we are hurt by the words or actions of others. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Sometimes it's hard to know where to start tapping on an issue. We know tapping will help. We know that we just need to start. But we don't quite know where to start. Our emotions feel like a knotty, tangled up necklace, with no obvious place to begin. In this week's audio I have the perfect way to start tapping for an issue when you don't know where to begin. It's particularly useful for helping us to tap when we are feeling stuck about taking action. I encourage you to listen to find out how to tap for: The nature of fear Not needing to be perfect Clearing the emotions around the situation so that you can work towards uncovering root causes The beautiful thing about this process is that after you listen to it just once, you will be able to use it any time you sit down to tap. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Tapping is a powerful tool that can be used to clear a huge range of issues, even those that have plagued us for years. Starting to make better choices feels great and allows positive change to seep into every part of our daily lives. At a certain point we almost forget about the issue because it seems like a distant memory. But then: WHAM! Out of nowhere we are right back in the middle of the old issue, emotions, or belief. We feel bad because of what we are experiencing AND we feel bad because we feel we've failed by falling back into our old behavior. That happened to me recently. Something I thought I had cleared snuck back up on me. In this audio I share how that can happen and what we can do to respond to backsliding on issues we thought we had cleared for good. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

I pride myself on being a thoughtful and helpful person. I like to believe that I am good at living up to my commitments. Most of the time this is true. BUT I am also human and I do make mistakes and unintentionally let people down. This week I have a very simple tap-along audio (and tapping script) to deal with those times in which we feel shame for letting others down. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

In my client sessions over the last few weeks I have found myself repeatedly saying that there are four reasons why we sabotage ourselves and stand in the way of taking the action we know we want to take. Without exception my clients respond with, "Wait! I want to write this down." So here are those four reasons written down for you: We don't have a clear vision. We don't know how to take the step. It is painful to take action. It is painful to be successful. There are practical and emotional reasons that can show up in each of these four areas. In this week's podcast I walk through all of these AND how you can start tapping for them. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

In my early years of tapping I was super eager to share tapping with everyone I possibly could. Over time I learned that it was best to share tapping (or anything for that matter) only with people who are actually open to learning something new. A number of years ago I was on a flight from Los Angeles to Chicago and ended up in a conversation with a fellow passenger that led to us doing a tapping session right there on the flight. Here are the twelve lessons I took away from the experience that might help you when you are tapping on your own, tapping with others, or are in a situation where you might be able to share tapping with others. You will find a written version of the twelve lessons below the player. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Note: If you find reading instructions more helpful than listening, you should check out the article version of the topic. When people unsubscribe from my mailing list they have the opportunity to leave a comment. I recently received a really interesting comment from someone who was unsubscribing from my list. She wrote: "I am very busy at the moment and I don't have time to practice, so I feel stressed out." I find that a fascinating comment. She is saying that her life feels so out of control that the thought of doing something that will make it better (like tapping) is too overwhelming! The reason she isn't willing to take the time to tap? It's not because she doesn't have the time or know how. The reason is because she isn't in enough pain. I'm serious. In the podcast I explain why being in pain can be a really positive thing AND how we can cultivate this pain to help us to take action. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

When I first started using Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) I thought the reason that we tapped was to feel better. My first two experiences with tapping reinforced this belief. My first memory of using EFT on my own was getting rid of one of the most profound headaches I had ever had in about 90 seconds. My second big moment was dealing with my social anxiety. It makes sense that this is what I thought EFT was all about because in both cases I felt SO much better. But there will be times when using tapping only as a way to feel better will do us a disservice because it impacts the action we take. This week I explore the two different types of outcomes that come from tapping and how to make sure we get the outcome that makes the most sense for the issue we are tapping on. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Trying again where we have failed in the past is one of the hardest things to do. I was recently faced with wanting to do something that didn't go well in the past. It wasn't that it went badly, but it was far from as successful as I would have liked, so I was hesitant about trying again. Here is an audio of me tapping in real time for this issue. You will hear me tapping for the issue and then processing each round of tapping to see what needs to be tapped on next. The tapping produces a useful tapping script and also shows you how I process through issues in real time. I would love your feedback on the tapping and to know if you find it helpful. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Theoretically we all want to be our authentic selves and show up in the world as we actually are. But for most of us it's just not that simple. From past experience we have learned that there are some situations where others don't understand us, or we have been judged harshly for being our authentic selves. That makes us reluctant to present ourselves in a way that will be judged by others. In truth, being our authentic selves is not an all-or-nothing proposition. We can choose how much of ourselves to share, with whom we share it, and when we share it. This will ensure we are doing in a way that is safe for us. This week I have a tap-along audio and tapping script that will help you to feel safe as you find the ways in which you want to share your authentic self. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

As many of you know, I also run the member site the Ruach Center. Every day members of the site receive an email from me with a link to a tap-along audio that is designed to conquer self-sabotaging behavior. Recently, as I was recording one of those audios, I personally experienced a huge emotional shift. This tap-along is about connecting to and appreciating all parts of our being and our experience. Even though the audio and script are short, it will make you feel more grounded right away. I thought it would be a great thing to share with everyone, not just the site members. I hope you find it as powerful as did. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Tapping is a tool that is both relatively simple to learn and implement, but deceptively complicated to master. The basics of tapping are easy to explain. So much so that I have given full instructions on the basics in under five minutes on the back of a bar napkin. At the same time, tapping effectively for a particular issue can require much subtlety and nuance and sometimes we need the help of an outside practitioner to be successful. That's why, despite being an experienced tapper and practitioner myself, I regularly work with a practitioner on my own issues. One of the biggest mistakes people make when tapping is choosing the wrong starting point for their issue. When this happens, progress is slow and relief is hard to find. Here is a simple process that I use to ensure that I am using the best starting point for my tapping. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The basics of tapping are so simple that they can be taught in mere minutes. But just because tapping is simple, doesn't mean that effective tapping is easy. There is so much more to it than knowing the tapping points. In this short audio I explain three simple ideas to keep in mind before you tap to help you to get the most out of your tapping sessions. Each of the three ideas comes with a short tap-along to help you execute them. I would love to hear how this works for you. Let me know your results down in the comment section. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It is great that we have people in our lives who want to be helpful. They are willing to offer their time, attention and advice to make our lives better. The problem is that just because someone wants to be helpful, doesn't mean that they are actually helpful – and sometimes they even make a situation worse! I call this type of help "well-meaning incompetence". Their heart is in the right place, but their advice or action doesn't actually do us any good. You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

It is difficult for us to see the people we love suffer but often we don't consider the consequences when we rush in to help. Our need to bring peace and comfort can override all other thoughts and considerations. This is not always the healthiest choice for us in the short and/or long term. Sometimes when we choose to help we do so by taking on the burdens of our loved ones. Many times we can carry these burdens for years without realizing, or we take on burdens when we are very young and do not remember choosing to do so. When the burdens of others have been a part of our lives for so long they feel like they are a part of us and we don't realize that they can be released. Taking on someone else's burden is an act of love motivated by wanting someone's life to be better. But there is an even higher act of love which is to release the burden we have taken on, bringing freedom to ourselves and to others. In this brief audio you will hear me leading a client through a demonstration of how we can use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)/tapping to let go of the burdens we are carrying for others. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

The idea of quitting comes with a lot of cultural baggage. Quitting is often seen as failure, or giving up, or as a sign of weakness. I'm sure you have heard the old chestnut, "Winners never quit and quitters never win." Don't get me wrong. It is a good thing to live up to commitments and take responsibility for the outcome of our choices, but at the same time, so is quitting the activities that are not producing positive outcomes. It is good for us to let go of the tasks, plans, relationships, and activities that no longer serve who we are and who we want to be. This week I have a tap-along audio that will help you to be comfortable with quitting the parts of your life that no longer serve you. This is one you might need to tap on more than once. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

This is a technique that I developed from some of the resources from Quantum Techniques. I use this with many of my clients at the end of sessions, especially when we have done powerful work. This is also a great way to relax at any time, but is particularly good for the end of the day or right before bedtime. The technique takes less than three minutes and it's so easy to master that you only need to listen to it once. The interesting thing is how effective this tool is and it doesn't even require you to tap at all. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

If you have been following me of any length of time online, then you know how much I love goal setting. I find that goals are useful in clarifying what we want, helping us to create an actionable plan, and give us the tools to evaluate our progress. At the same time, having a clear idea of what we want can actually become a problem when we turn success into an all-or-nothing proposition. When we make our goals all or nothing, anything less than perfection will feel like a failure. For example, let's consider a painful knee that hurts at the level of a 7 on a 0 to 10 scale. If my all-or-nothing goal is to be completely pain free, even a reduction in the pain to a 2 will leave me feeling dissatisfied. This causes two problems in the moment. First, we aren't able to appreciate the progress we have made. Second, we are much less likely to take action again in the future because we are unlikely to attempt tasks at which we "failed" in the past. This week I have a simple tap-along audio to help you celebrate the success you are having and to clear any resistance to keep taking action because you haven't yet reached your goal. You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

While on retreat a number years ago Russ Hudson said, "We must be in touch with the mind, body, and spirit in order to be candidates for transformation." Because of the nature of the modern world we have lost touch with our physical bodies. Most of us are not working the land, in tune with the seasons, or using our bodies for work. Just watch someone who is on-line. It looks as if they have left their bodies. It is very easy (and healthy) to reconnect with our physical bodies. This simple little tap-along will help you to reconnect to your body and feel more grounded inside your body. It takes less than 4 minutes to do and is the prefect tap-along to start your day. After you do it a few times you are going to be able to repeat the process without having to listen to the audio again. Support the podcast! Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! Human beings are social creatures. That means that in order to thrive, we need to do more than just interact with others, we need to work together, whether collaboratively in a professional context, or by sharing enjoyable activities in our social lives. Whenever we ask someone to do something with or for us, we risk being turned down. That may seem obvious, but there is a deeper issue at play because on a subconscious level, a rejection may be read as a rejection of us and who we are. Even though this isn't the case, if we are struggling with that emotion, we are unlikely to take the action that we want to take. When we don't ask to connect and work with others, we miss opportunities and our lives aren't as rich. This week I have for you a simple tap-along (tapping script below) to help you to know it is safe to ask others, even if they might say no. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! I am a huge proponent of goal setting. Having clearly defined goals is helpful in two ways. First, it helps to define the actions we need to take to achieve them. Second, it gives us a measuring stick with which to evaluate our efforts along the way and after the fact. Without having set goals I wouldn't be as happy and successful as I am. I love goal setting so much that I created an entire web site dedicated to working toward your goals. But there is a problem with goals: they create expectations. Expectations aren't the problem, but they can create a false dichotomy. On a subconscious level we may believe that either we achieve our goals as written OR we have failed, with nothing in between. Failing to recognize our progress can demotivate us. In this short audio and tap-along I talk about how you can avoid the feeling of all or nothing that setting goals can create. (As always, the full tapping script can be found below the audio player.) If you are interested in a systematic way of using tapping to achieve your goals and avoiding common pitfalls like the "all-or-nothing" disposition, I encourage you to check out The Ruach Center Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! With some issues measuring our success is a simple task. For example, after going to the gym four times a week for a few months I can measure how much stronger I am by how much weight I can now lift compared with when I started. But not all types of transformation are as easy to track, particularly for issues and responses that are incrementally changing over time. For example, how could you measure more confidence or less anger? In this conversation Mary Ayers and I talk about how we can measure our progress through the lenses of three different characteristics of the issue that are all measurable. If you are tapping on an issue over the course of multiple tapping sessions, then understanding this is a must. First, it will help you to understand what is working so that you can continue to do it. Second, it will identify the areas where you need to try a different approach. Finally, seeing the progress that is often missed will help you to gain momentum in your transformational work. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora Guest: Dr. Mary Ayers Contact: web @ TapIntoAction.com; web radio @ The Chickenshits Guide to Success; facebook @ Tap Into Action About Mary: Dr. Mary Ayers knows how to get people un-stuck! With her years of experience as a therapist and a coach, you won't find the typical or ordinary coaching techniques in her programs. When it comes to taking action, she pulls out all the stops – delving deep to find those hidden fears and limiting beliefs. Known for her UNconventional, often "off the wall" methods, she will get you moving towards your goals without bullying, shaming or "pushing through the fear". With over 27 years in the Human Development field, her accomplishments include 5 years as a coach with the Anthony Robbins Organization, EFT Expert on The Tapping World Summit, and Host of the radio show "The Chickenshit's Guide to Success".

Support the podcast! We often treat our bodies as if they are the enemy and the journey towards better health as a battle. We can feel betrayed by our bodies, and feel hopeless and frustrated by our slow or lack of progress. But our bodies are not our enemy. In reality, our bodies are doing what they can to be healthy and there are simply unseen obstacles to the healing process Once we recognize that we are not separate from our bodies, and that they are trying to function in an optimal way, it becomes easier to work towards better health and well being. Recently I was working with a client on returning to a healthier body after backsliding (again). After a great session he asked if we could spend some time on helping him to believe that progress was possible and to reconnect with his body. When we had finished the session he said, "You should write that down so others can use it." When I told him that I could share the recording if I had his permission, he insisted I did, so here it is. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! It is amazing how much stock we put in other people's opinion of who we are and how we are supposed to be in the world. Recently I was introduced to the quote "I'm not who I think I am. I not who you think I am. I am who I think you think I am." [Note: Unfortunately the source of this quote is not clear, or I would provide it. It is variously credited to Charles Horton Cooley, Thomas Cooley, and Dennis Cooley.] The gist of the quote is that we often find ourselves trying to live up to an imagined standard that we think other people have for us. This is a surefire recipe for self-sabotage! Either we will be trying to do what we want to do and trying to do what we think others want us to do. This has us taking action in multiple and often conflicting ways, which results in little to no progress. OR we take no action at all because we are caught between our own desires and the perceived desires of others. In this week's podcast I provide two ways to remedy this situation. First, I have a simple process for uncovering and tapping for the specific expectations we think others have for us. Second, I have more general tap-along to help you get moving even when you can't see the beliefs clearly. As always, I have included a text version of the tapping script below the audio player that you can print out. Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora

Support the podcast! The human experience can be full of complications and conflicts. My clients often say things like "I am of two minds" or "My head is telling me one thing but my heart is telling me something else." It's difficult to move forward if we feel we are being pulled in multiple directions! To help navigate this, I have created what I call the Grounding Process. It is designed to move you from feeling scattered to being fully grounded by connecting your mind, heart, and physical body to your higher self. This is one of my favorite processes and I teach it in my advanced classes as an example of both guided imagery and parts work. I do this process myself at least once a week. The first time I did it I was amazed at the information my system gave me. A number of years ago Jessica Ortner of the Tapping Insiders Club interviewed me about the process. We then did the process together, so that you can tap right along with it. [Note: In an effort to make the Tapping Q & A Podcast archive easier to navigate, the old bonus podcasts have been turned into full episodes. This episode was originally released December 24th, 2009.] Subscribe in: Apple | iPhone | Android | Google | Spotify | Pandora This is one of my favorite processes. I teach it in my advanced classes as an example of both guided imagery and parts work. I do this process myself at least once a week. The first time I did it I was amazed at the information my system gave me. In this version Jessica of the Tapping Insiders Club asks me a few questions about it and then you can follow the process and tap right along.