Superpowered Mind with Clare Dimond

Is there a time and a place when we don't need to go into the feeling. Is there a danger of becoming too hypervigilant around feelings

Can you say more about what you mean by 'pinning the mind down'?

There's an experience of 'head-funk' right now (an indication of separation/mind entanglement) so I'd appreciate some feedback..Responsibility. It comes up A LOT here and in coaching conversations. In the sense of a heaviness of personal responsibility for children/team at work (as a team leader) and others in general. It's a pervasive story about their wellbeing resting on me. That obviously can't be true but looks SO true. Especially with the blurred lines with children in the context of guiding/caring for and looking after their needs.In no-separation (dropping out of that self-story), it feels like it's about source accountability - ie. showing up moment-by-moment and responding in alignment with what makes sense (feeling the integrity of that intersection between 'all-that-we-are' and the gritty, humanness of life).So in sanity, it drops out of the loop of going via the 'story self/identity' and there's simply intimacy with the moment. That already feels lighter and clearer.I'd welcome your perspectives x

Dear Clare,For some time I wanted to ask you how you see quriosity in this process of inquiry of who we truly are?Looks like its energy brings openness and lightness. It carries little self identification and is true balsam in life in comparison with heaviness and devastation that shame brings.Thank you a lot :)All the bestUrska

Hello Clare,The last few times I felt shame, I got excited as the realisation hit me:“Oh… I’m feeling shame!” … like in ‘discovering a hint in a treasure hunt’Who knew shame could be exciting?? You make me curious of my ‘worst nightmare’. :)I then heard ‘Clare in my head’ saying:“What’s at stake here? What is being protected? Shame is where you are most identified. There’s a ‘you’ doing, a ‘you’ deciding…”Indeed! So much energy involved in trying to control the way people see ‘me’. So much energy that could be used to flourish. And, little by little, ‘I am’noticing some of that energy being diverted towards new endeavours. ‘I am’ noticing the doing of things I would not have dared trying in the past. And now, I’m hearing ‘Clare in my head’ again: “This is freedom!”Thank you, Clare. I’m so grateful for your teachings 💛Dear Clare,Thank you again for the powerful conversation we had yesterday. I felt safe with you and wasn't so scary to dig deep into one of my core wounds.Just wanted to share that yesterday awareness went a bit further and I noticed later on accompanied feeling of guilt with feeling of not being OK/ not being worth the way I am. Welcoming this feeling of guilt firstly revealed the feeling of guilty that I need so much love & approval. And staying present a bit longer I saw this feeling is actually shame in disguise. Feeling responsible with strong believing in a doer/chooser/decider that is behind this strong craving for attention and love and that he/she shouldn't be like that.Thank you again and lotz of love :)Urska

Firstly thank you, I feel so lucky to have found you & your teaching.I feel my grounding is accelerating & I am living in the home space so much more.Can we talk about hormones? This month I have been feeling a low grade depression, I feel it is hormone related as it happens after ovulation. This has been my pattern all my adult life but once I saw through it with the principles I saw that it was not two weeks low mood & I had good days and bad days in the 2nd half of my cycle. But this month I am not lifting & I am totally resisting this. Then I go to, I must be perimenopausaul , how can I fix this? or what do I need to feel & trying to manage my experience. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

hi Clare I loved your book it’s not me and it’s not you. Would you say that When we heal do we get what we want to have in our life?'

This course is blowing me away - quite literally 🤣 and I’m loving the journey. It is so powerful to confront the ego and feel into that contraction and inquire into the story from the position of neutral, curious awareness.I am wanting to get more experientially connected with the portal of powerful healing. Your book recommendation for this portal is Dr Nicole LePara How to Do the Work. So before buying, I listened to a podcast with Dr Nicole speaking about the book and what she teaches in it. She talked repeatedly about her ethos being about moving beyond the traditional teachings of psychology to embracing the holistic inter-connected whole mind-body system and its inter-connectedness to all life as a whole.. Then she emphasised about us being the chooser of our actions and I wondered if this was contradictory to the non-dual teaching of no chooser and doer. The latter is starting to really land for me - particularly the way that new choices/decisions occur sub-consciously through changes in what is understood by the mind-body system- and I don’t want to resurrect old beliefs by reading this book if one of its keystone premises is that there is a little me who has the power to makes choices. Please can you advise me on any caveat as to how I engage with the messages in the book in order to gain from it the things you had in mind when you recommended it.

I am on the Be the Change course and I love what you are saying. Is there a risk though that it might open the doors to victim blaming? How do we make sure that doesn’t happen.

What was your most intense spiritual experience this year?.

I don't understand a word of what you are saying. Can you tell me the basics?

I was on a retreat and the teacher and the participants laughed at the idea of non-dual therapy because all of it is an illusion anyway and yet your work seems to be going more and more in that direction. Can you say more?

Cycle of retraumatisation: example from social media My partner moved in at the beginning of the year, a month later we bought our first puppy. Neither of us has owned a dog before but were both super excited. I hate my life now. I was so happy with my partner moving in, it felt so natural and my 12 year DD adjusted well too. Home has always been my favourite place and now I absolutely hate being here. My partner is very active in caring for pup so it’s not like he’s not helping. We’ve just had a row over pup as he tried to come downstairs and take over because he thought I was getting too angry. This just felt so patronising and obviously hit a nerve because I do feel like the worlds shittest dog owner. He loves pup and they are best mates, I just feel like the evil puppy hater and I’m jealous of the bond they have. I’ve had 3 hours sleep tonight and I'm currently on the sofa next to pups crate just crying. Someone please tell me it gets better because I’m starting to feel very very dark.I’m just gobsmacked at the emotional toll it’s taking. I find the screech type barking really hard and I don’t have a huge amount of patience. My partner does though so I just feel so inferior. I wasn’t a great mum to my daughter when she was born and it’s triggering that exact same guilt. I knew it would be hard I just didn’t expect it to make me miserable and resentful

OMG, I just realised the “I can’t do xyz or I’ll die” (the basis of nearly all of our/my fears) doesn’t mean my body will die, it means the construct of ‘I’ will die!! It’s total bullshit, all of it, because I doesn’t even exist!

How can the mirror exercise not lead to self recrimination - something that I am very good at?

I would like to be "love", "hope", "freedom", "peace", "joy", and me. How? The "me" would love to wake up one day and be the definition of these words.

Does anyone have a story they can share with me of suffering = healing. It really doesn’t feel that way right now!

I listened to today’s podcast and found it really helpful, but I have a further question if that’s ok? Clare talked about going into the body being the way in which we come into reality, into the present moment and into true healing. But if we feel our thinking, then surely the sensations in the body are a result of our current thinking, in that moment, which is made up of the continual searching to find peace? I do find it helpful going into the body but it also revs up my mind, but perhaps that is because I have such a detached relationship with my body that going into it brings up fear. I hope the question makes sense!

This morning I went into the body instead of the narrative. Within a few minutes I experienced quiet and then got out of bed. 5:15 am which I often would go back to sleep but I thought I'd journal. There wasn't much there. I could have gone back into the narrative while journaling but I didn't. Okay so here I am SANE as you would say. My mind goes - Now what?

I spent years doing a method where I would question thoughts/beliefs. It served me to see that "I" was making a choice and that if I wanted to feel happier then I could choose to believe something else. It was powerful to discover that my thoughts created my reality. After 15 years of this approach, I entered the coaching world and found an infinite number of approaches to feeling happier, content, grounded including meditation, 3Ps, falling into the space of who/what I really am, etc.When I came across your work and had the mind-blowing realization that "I/ME" was an accumulation of thoughts, stories - a spinning mental narrative projecting an external world of childhood wounds, traumas, insecurities - I was excited because I knew it was true. "I" was a story. Even with that knowledge, every morning, I wake up into a fear-based, identified mind e.g. terror, low-level anxiety, worry, out-of-control imagination of bad things happening to me and my loved ones, etc and when I engage with those thoughts, I notice the same themes of lack, control, wrongness, trying to be safe, resistance, etc. This experience feels real, feels like ME, who I am. Intellectually, I know that isn't true but it's experienced as true, real. I've heard you say to question the mind's narrative, get curious, parent the child/survival mind. . .but I end up caught in the negative mental loop. And I've heard you say - get sane, present - go into the body. When I do the latter, I can feel the levels of fear, discomfort. I can get beneath them to feel sensations and often quiet is experienced. But nothing else. Isn't this a form of spiritual bypass? I know I'm not using spiritual superiority as a way to hide from insecurities but I'm "avoiding" the mental narrative by going into the body. I'm not experiencing the fear or anger or upset. I'm not "facing" the stories of lack, examining the childhood wounds, questioning them nor understanding them. Any more thoughts on this would be helpful.

I've been experimenting. I'm a new coach and a few days after listening to the abundance subliminal secured my first paying client, hehe!I am immersed in your youtube podcast ... and have read the Home and It's not You books ... so far!I hope you are feeling better ... and thank you for your work!

Dear Clare, Regarding The Mirror - is this what you mean? I am resentful of my badly behaving teenage daughter because SHE is limiting MY freedom. She won't do what I say. She's out of control. I can't control her. And I need her to behave differently as I cannot continue with this intolerable situation. As a result of her constant drama, my life is out of control and not as I want it.The Mirror: Where I am I doing what I am accusing her of?My daughter is appearing as she is because I am limiting HER freedom. I won't do what she says. I'm controlling her. And she needs me to behave differently as she cannot continue with this intolerable situation. As a result of my constant drama, her life is out of her control and not as she wants itI had not thought about it that way before, and I see that is totally true.Now what? Stop limiting her freedom so she can stop limiting mine? Not possible due to the catastrophe and actual danger that would create - such a resistance to even considering this. Plus my identify of 'parent' is also pulled into this. BUT there is still an obvious 'me' and 'her' in what I've just written.Thanks for the mirror, Clare - what do I DO with what I see? How do I 'unseparate' the 'separation' as is that even the aim of the game. Or what?

What does "heart not in it" or "going through the motions" mean if there is no self?"to do the base functions of an activity without much thought or interest or enthusiasm" also to do it without commitment or insincerely. If emotions are continuing to shift, is this just the system doing what makes sense without the emotions ending up as interested or pleasurable? I do dishes every day, I wouldn't describe it as going through the motions, and also wouldn't say it's interesting or that I do them enthusiastically.

I just found out that my daughter is self harming again or still. Also she thinks she can’t anything and so she just doesn’t care. About school in this case. She still cares a lot about animals. I have like a black out in an exam. I want to see my equivalent but I don’t know what to look for. Ok, the don’t care was quite a pattern but not so much anymore. But the self harming? Yes I used to smoke, and take drugs and binge eat, but I‘m not for decades/years. This can’t be it?

1. Can we revisit the "real world" bit as in where information about reality stops and imagination begins and vice versa. 2. I noticed in a recent call you said "isn't it interesting how reality can shift so dramatically from one moment to the next?"The speaker had been commenting about what I have noticed as well, that for example in the morning there will be "bad" feelings about a specific situation, and then in the afternoon it somehow looks different although nothing about the situation has changed. I have called this the perceptual lens changing. But you call it reality. Is that because there is no doer choosing to have one specific lens or another? Or is it because all reality is subjective? Or both? And this is also why non-dual teachers say everything is an illusion at the far end of this discussion?

I get confused around the notion of "privilege" that's more and more common these days.How do racism, sexism, classism, etc. all fit into our understanding?As a valid, white, heterosexual cis-woman I sometimes feel the social pressure to acknowledge my "privilege" or witness people confessing theirs, but it doesn't quite make sense on a deeper level. How can I be responsible or sorry for my race/gender/sexual orientation, etc?I was at an anti-racism workshop lately and the vocabulary appeared to reinforce duality: victim/villain, people of colour/white people, etc.How do you approach discrimination through a compassionate non-dual lens?Is there really such a thing as "privilege" ?

I've often heard you talk about the love that we find when all our believed thoughts and illusions are finally dropped. Obviously, I've never gotten anywhere near a million miles away from even first base in this respect, but I'm feeling a tad anxious and lacking that even in my most "oh, I think I just had a bit of a glimpse of what everyone's pointing at" moments, I never seem to have any kind of connection with anything like a love feeling. I can feel nice and peaceful and calm enough, yes, but it's a pleasantly nothingy kind of feeling at best. So I was wondering if one day you could talk a bit more about this love and joy and expansive freedom that is real Reality, and - oh, I don't know - I suppose I'm asking you to make me feel a bit better at not being able to feel it. Sorry. Told you I'm a real pain. But I truly am curious/puzzled as to what exactly you mean when you use the word "love" for what lies beyond.Still, I do know what I mean when I say all love to you,

Do things need to become conscious to change? What is the value of an experience being had at a conscious level

I am doing the Be the Change course. I understand the message that change happens from within us . but there are still terrible acts out there. People’s behaviour can be violent and dangerous. is there not a risk that we will let this go untacked while we are working on ourselves?

Since starting to learn about non duality and having some big shifts in realisation I am finding myself getting frustrated with my friends and the inconsequential things they discuss. I feel like saying to them that none of these things are real anyway but of course I don’t but I do end up withdrawing from the conversation and getting quieter. What should I do about this. Is it only possible now to have friends that are in this conversation?

The past - I can see why on the one hand it isn’t always true and can change but at the same time if I think about people with alzheimers or brain damage who’s memory is damaged we can’t argue that memories and a sense of time are crucial to live independently and interact with the world. It is dangerous to not have that - forgetting to turn off the gas or where we live.

What is healing? Listener question

A brief summary of this episode

Non-violent communication. Marshall Rosenberg. Sunday book

Great blog as always...It leaves me with the sense that I'm still not seeing something. There is a sense that what thoughts are 'paid attention to' and which aren't is somehow within 'my' control. What you're saying is that this is not true. There is no 'I' to direct awareness. So there's confusion. In your work I understood we were exploring and noticing the 'programme'. In the noticing and new learning, a new 'programme' is formed. But if there is 'no thing' directing awareness how does this even work?! My misunderstanding - I notice a belief that has unto this point been 'running the show'. In the noticing and being with the feelings, healing happens. A 'new pathway' is formed. But who is doing that? Who is noticing the 'old beliefs' and sitting with the feelings?

Seeing that we are the awareness watching this mind body system make choices, and there is no impact to make “out there”, I’m really watching my system go into “well what’s the point then”, in a way dissolving any of my past externally driven motivations. I also see how from here it’s just watching the system do the next thing there is to do, including doing nothing or sitting with this confusion. If there’s no world out there to make an impact in, then there’s really the freedom to experience what we’d like to experience next, in a non-attached way being ok if it doesn’t happen. So this observer now becoming creator of next thing this system will experience is what I’m curious about now. Going from “well what’s the point” to “wow there’s only freedom now” I’m sorta getting intellectually, and I’m excited to experience it in an embodied/integrated way! 🥴🤩🤓

With this understanding we attend so much more to all the things that are happening inside which can lead to very strong experiences and I wonder how to deal with this overwhelming state, especially in situations with other people?

Since we all have our separate realities. Words like Peace, Joy, Happiness, etc. are defined differently by each of us with our separate realities. Because our definitions will all be different, are any of the definitions of these thoughts and feelings True/Truthful?

I’m about to start the Be the Change course and I’m worried what it will do to me. There are so many things I want to change about the world and I feel as someone with values that this is important. I scroll through social media and I see the videos of violence and the confusion out there. It makes me feel sick and anxious and often I can’t sleep for worrying about the state of the world - especially if I have listened to the news late at night. I am worried that you are just going to say well stop scrolling social media, stop listening to the news. I know that will make me feel better but in a way I don’t want to feel better. Why should I feel peaceful when people are suffering? If I stop looking at these feeds then I worry I’ll end up just end up in some sort of removed bubble, not in touch with reality. So I guess my question is how can I stay in touch with what is going on but still stay in this conversation?

It always surprises me how some of my vegan friends are offensive towards me as someone who eats meat. Is being Vegan really about the love for animals? Well their offensives can go off the roof. Do they really fight for animal rights or just protect their values? This question came from the conclusion that even the most altruistic act is driven by selfishness to get something for the SELF. Like my own example of going volunteering to the dog shelters. At one point I saw how doing this is for me to get praise and admiration and has little to do with the stray dogs.

I have been incredibly emotional lately. I cry a lot, actually so much that I am wondering if that is still normal. Also I was very irritated in some situations at work and afterwards I felt like it was really unprofessional to lose my temper.I think I have always been a very emotional person and my feelings are always very intense. I only let myself have them at home and with very few people I trust a lot. In all the other situations it feels too dangerous and I kind of make sure to always keep my emotions out of everything because I don't want to scare people away or lose control over what I say. It feels like something did break open and that there is something very important and powerful in this, and I wonder where to go with this.Sometimes I feel like a child that hasn't learned yet how to regulate their emotions, and now that I am writing this I wonder if I actually really haven't learned this yet.Writing this E Mail also seems kind of inappropriate because I learned that I should't be like this, so I have many thoughts about what anyone reading this would think about me.As always I wonder if any of what I just wrote makes sense, and would be very happy if you could share your thoughts on this.

I’ve been doing some exercises around the ‘headless way’ which involves noticing that there isn’t really a person looking ‘out’ at experience, there is just an expansive nothingness. Through the exercises ‘I’ have seen this, but the nagging question keeps coming back…How can it be true that there isn’t a centre to experience when what ‘I’ experience is also unique to this body, these eyeballs etc.? If I was blind or deaf, I would experience the world entirely differently. Does this not imply that there is an ‘experiencer’ with unique qualities which then inform their experience? How can this be reconciled with the idea that there is only ‘pure’ awareness or experience?

Hi Clare I was brought up by a mum who was very anxious about what people thought of her. She would often over commit to helping others and end up exhausted. I can see the same tendency’s and lack of boundaries in myself and so I try to say no but then I hear you talking about unconditional love and I get confused. Does it mean always saying yes to people?

A relative of mine was recently sectioned and diagnosed with psychosis. I understand psychosis to be a condition in which contact is lost with external reality. I spoke to them just before they went into hospital and I could see that what they were saying did not relate to my understanding of reality. But aren’t we saying in the conversation that there is no external reality any way. If that is the case then aren’t we all psychotic if we believe there is? How come there can be degrees of reality?

I hear a lot in social media about gas lighting. I haven’t experienced it myself I don’t think but every time I hear it mentioned I wonder how can there be such a thing as gas lighting if there is as you say no objective reality. Can you help with this please?

I’m a member and fan of your subliminals. Great to see how the mind is kept out, and the body still reacts on the hidden messages. I used to be a hypnotherapist and would like to know your opinion on the use of plain Hypnosis (a different technique, as you know, from subliminals). With hypnosis, the brain is not kept out, you actually hear the spoken words. It works as a program on top of another program and I’ve seen with clients that sometimes the ‘old’ unwanted program returns. I wonder whether hypnosis could help people remember who they really are. That it is safe to allow every feeling, every sensation in the body. Even the unwanted ones and the resistance are welcome.” As I see how much your teachings and my training as a 3 Principles facilitator helped me, I would like to combine this with plain hypnosis to help other people who are desperate for relief. Since you are also a trained hypnotherapist, I would like to hear your opinion. Thank you so much Clare for your dedicated and loving teachings.

I just watched the mental health webinar und I heard something I never heard before. You said: 'All conscious experience is a healing place for us' and you also said that the physical is healed here, too. Can you say more about that? It's funny because it feels like I never heard this before AND I don't know what you mean, apart from seeing the conditioning, but is this healing? Doesn't feel like. I am sure you have spoken a milllion times about that.

Do you think identification squelches our unique desires? Example: if I am with a friend and they are talking with enthusiasm and excitement about going on a backpacking trip. Prior to this conversation I didn't have much desire to go on a backpacking trip. Or they want to watch musicals, or they want to try a dance class....etc. Now there's a sudden "I want to to do this!" impulse or urge showing up. Is that a genuine desire? A form of conditioned patterning of a desire that's a form of comparison (they're cool I want to be cool, or they're excited, I want that excitement - must be from the backpacking)? Is this a latent desire that emerges when someone else speaks it? It seems like identification hides desires or puts false ones in place in an attempt to obtain a specific emotional state,thank you!

“Relationships are not meant to be fun”What? Why?How can you say that so confidently?!?When I left my first marriage, I could have said exactly what the listener said in your podcast.I know I did not do my work then as it was all about him and why I couldn’t continue to be in the relationship because of how he was.However we have 3 children and so have stayed in touch and actually have a lovely relationship even though he has not changed in any way that I can see.So I can honestly say I love him, but would not consider living together again.So my question is….If relationships are not meant to be fun, why would one ever consider being in a committed one?Why not just do your ‘work’ with all the relationships in your life and then have a partner just for fun?As usual looking forward to and dreading your answer.

Book recommendations from Tia: The Body Remembers Volumes 1 and 2 by Babette Rothschild, these really helped me understand the power of adaptation and that even behaviors we judge as "bad" had some type of intelligence for survival, even if they are no longer useful. These are written for therapists/practitioners so some chapters people might skip, however I find the case studies relatable and helpful in understanding why therapists make some of the choices they do.Call of the Wild: How We Heal Trauma, Awaken Our Own Power and Use it For Good by Kimberly Ann Johnson - This gives a clear explanation of nervous system function, somatics and its varied applications. Bodyfulness: by Christine Caldwell - This gives an overview of core concepts with multiple practices to try at the end of each chapter. It's a bit more heady I have a bookshop affiliate page if that's helpful: https://bookshop.org/shop/findingmindfulnowSomatic organizations I recommend in the US:-Lumous Transforms-Strozzi Institute-Generative Somatics-The Embody Lab (they have students from across the globe) - people can look at the list of practitioners from the Integrative Somatic Trauma Therapy Certification for other directions.