Sex With Emily

Casual sex gets a bad rap. We associate it with hookup culture, with disposability, with mindless Tinder swipes. But it doesn’t have to be that way: when approached with an intentional, conscious mindset, casual sex can be exactly what you need to feel erotic and energized again. The key? Knowing yourself – and knowing precisely what you want to get out of your casual sex experience. On today’s show, I parse out all the different types of casual sex out there, and offer some research that may surprise you. Next, I discuss how you know if casual sex is right for you, and when it’s best to say, “no thank you.” Finally, I coach you on how to make your casual sex encounters fulfilling, with maturity, self-awareness, and of course – an orgasm or two. Or ten. Show Notes: 7 Myths of Non Monogamy Friends With Benefits: A Guide Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What’s holding you back in bed? We’ve all got our pain points: body image, not being able to tell your partner what you want, feeling embarrassed to make noise or express yourself. But I asked you how you overcame sexual insecurities, and you came back with SOLID advice. So on today’s show, along with my advice, we’re spreading the sexual confidence gospel using tips from the Sex With Emily community. First, we get into body image: how to hack your brain to feel more comfortable in your skin. Next, I talk about my favorite subject: communicating with your partner, to create a culture of sex positivity. Finally, I’ve got a particularly juicy tip to help you let go in bed and express yourself without inhibition — to hear it, just take a listen to this episode. Show Notes: Ask Emily: My Partner Watches Porn a LIttle Too Enthusiastically Feeld Fet Life First Date, First Orgasm, First Threesome Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you build a sex room, they will come. That’s the idea behind the new Netflix show “How to Build a Sex Room,” and on today’s episode I’ve got designer Melanie Rose here with me to discuss her real-life erotic renovations. From a rock n’ roll dungeon to a high-end sex spa, Melanie has all kinds of decor ideas you can steal: spanking benches, wall-mounted handcuffs, soundproofing wall art. All of these are client-approved sex innovations, but the show has a touching side too. You get to see all kinds of clients, from suburbanites to polycules, parents to long-distance couples, discuss their fantasies and sexual desires – some of them for the very first time. And you know I’m all about that. Show Notes: For More Melanie Rose: Netflix show | Instagram | Website | Pinterest Where is The Clitoris? Liberator Throw Blanket Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s get sexually adventurous, people. On today’s hotline calls show, you’re bringing the novelty, and I am one hundred percent here for it. Jumping right in: can you use the same sex toy with multiple partners? Let’s find out. If you’re in your 20s and hooking up with a much older woman, is that ok? Or what if you’re all about female empowerment, except you ARE a female, and you DO want to be choked and spanked in bed? Finally: there’s a first time for everything, so should you tell a partner that you’ve never had penetration before? Or what if you’re married, and ready to experience your first open relationship – except your spouse isn’t on-board? All this and more on a particularly juicy hotline calls show. Show Notes: Shop Page Vesper Vibrator Necklace Bellesa Sex, Porn & (Erika) Lust No Shame, Just Sex w/ Erin Tillman Opening Up by Tristan Taormino The Ethical Slut Open Deeply It’s Open (Relationship) Season w/ Dr. Wednesday Martin Orgasms & Oral (No Penetration Required) First Date, First Orgasm, First Threesome Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gotta love relationship advice delivered in a thick New York accent. I’ve got Adam Ferrara on the show today, and we’re healing your emotional triggers so you can have thriving interpersonal connections. Capiche? Adam and I talk meditation and breathwork for anxiety, the difference between responding and reacting to your partner, how to cultivate a felt sense of your emotions, and the difference between worry and responsibility. As a self-described co-dependent, Catholic Italian, Adam is as real as it gets about getting vulnerable and doing self-work, so you can experience better love, sex, and communication. We also help a caller in her 20s get more selfish in the bedroom – because when it comes to sex, selfishness can be a real virtue. Show Notes: More Adam Ferrara: Youtube Comedy Special | Website | Instagram | Twitter | Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s talk about non-monogamy! In the nearly two decades since I’ve been doing the show, I’ve never gotten so much interest in this topic as I am right now. Which is why I’m joined today by cultural anthropologist Dr. Wednesday Martin, who in addition to researching non-monogamy for her books and articles, has first-hand experience opening up her own marriage. On today’s episode, Wednesday reveals what modern sex research shows about female sexuality and long-term, monogamous relationships: a woman’s desire typically wanes between year 1 to 4. In addition, Wednesday and I discuss the difference between non-monogamy, swinging and polyamory, how to go about finding a partner outside of your primary relationship, how to set rules, and the surprising ways opening up improved her own partnership. Show Notes: More Wednesday Martin: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Youtube Untrue by Wednesday Martin 7 Myths of Non-Monogamy Feeld Opening Up by Tristan Taormino Open Monogamy: A Guide to Co-Creating Your Ideal Relationship Agreement by Tammy Nelson The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships Crazy on the Inside: A Memoir of Nobody Special Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non Monogamy The Anxious Person’s Guide to Non-Monogamy: Your Guide to Open Relationships, Polyamory and Letting Go More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever tried anal play? Anal sex? Because if not, here’s my question to you…what’s holding you back? For most folks, the answer is fear. We’re scared it will hurt, scared that we don’t know what we’re doing, scared we’ll feel ashamed if we just so happen to love it. That’s why I’ve got two of the anal pleasure experts on the show today, to help demystify and destigmatize anal play, and help you open up yet another pathway to pleasure. Dr. Evan Goldstein and Alicia Sinclair talk to me about anal orgasms (not a myth), the importance of anal training, how to prepare hygienically, and how to strengthen the mind-booty connection for a successful, erotic anal experience. Show Notes: Anal Play: A Beginner's Guide OR Prostate Play 101 More Evan Goldstein: Website | Instagram | Bespoke Surgical | Future Method More B-vibe: Website | Instagram Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’ve never talked about your sex life with your partner before, there’s a good chance they’ll push back. Why? Because most of us go into fight or flight mode when talking about sex: it’s not normalized in our culture, we get defensive, we feel like we’re being criticized. But never fear – you can create a culture of sex communication in your relationship, one talk at a time. Be the change, is what I’m saying. On today’s hotline show, I take your calls about having a sex talk. Like: telling your wife you want her to massage your prostate. Or telling a partner you want your vanilla sex to be a little spicier. How to relax into oral and give your partner tips to make you scream, and how to tell your partner: “you know what? I need to be seduced a little before we jump into penetration.” If we can talk about sex like we talk about dinner, everyone wins! So take a listen to this episode, and see if your next sex talk isn’t a little bit easier. Show Notes: Embodied is The New Sexy: 5 Benefits of Living a Radically Embodied Life A+ Oral Sex for Vulvas Everybody Loves Oral Ask Emily: How Do I Better Enjoy Oral Sex? Mind-Blowing Oral Sex in Under 5 Minutes: The Kivin Method Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you always have sex on the the first date? Do you always swipe right on people who aren’t good for you? What are your bad dating habits – and how can you break them? I asked you to tell me what negative dating patterns you’re trying to change, and you all delivered! On today’s show, I’m addressing your top dating problems so we can solve them together. Having sex too soon, trying to “fix” less-than-ideal partners, fear of asserting yourself, having misaligned expectations, the tendency to audition people for the role of life partner – we’re covering it all, so you can feel empowered with new partners and have an amazing time with existing partners. Show Notes: Ask Emily: Tips for French Kissing Am I Dating a Narcissist? w/ Dr Ramani How to Not Die Alone w/ Logan Ury Orgasms and Oral (No Penetration Required) More About EMDR Therapy Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When it comes to sex, why was the world set up so that vulva owners are the ones in charge of preventing a pregnancy? That’s the central question of a Twitter thread that went viral in 2018, and on today’s show I’ve got Gabrielle Stanley Blair, the author of that thread – and a forthcoming book, Ejaculate Responsibly – here to talk about it. I’m also joined by anthropologist, author, and my dear friend Dr. Wednesday Martin, to unpack this fascinating topic. In a post-Roe world, Gabrielle is calling for a wholesale shift in the way we think about pregnancy prevention: namely, by inviting penis owners and their bodies into the conversation. On today’s show, we talk condoms and sexual pleasure, how society pressures vulva owners to become mothers, how to talk to young men about ejaculating responsibly, why MORE sex ed leads to LESS unwanted pregnancies, and why Gabrielle – mother of six and a Mormon – is passionate about arguing that women’s lives matter, and so does their pleasure. One more thing: Can pre-ejaculate, or pre-cum, cause unwanted pregnancy? Pre-ejaculate actually does NOT contain sperm. However, any sperm remaining in the urethra from a previous ejaculation may be carried out with pre-cum which would have a chance of causing a pregnancy. The solution? Urinate before having sex to flush out any leftover sperm, and, as always, wear a condom! For more information, visit Teen Health Source. Show Notes: More Gabrielle Blair: Instagram | Twitter | Website Gabrielle’s Viral Twitter Thread More information about her forthcoming book: Ejaculate Responsibly More Dr Wednesday Martin: Instagram | Twitter | Website The Secret to Better Sex? Talking About It Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Anxiety, depression and low self-worth all block our sexual pleasure. But on a more fundamental level, they block us from showing up in the world the way we’d like: as confident, happy, sexy people. That’s why I invited my own therapist, Dr. Anadel Barbour, to talk to us through healing those intrusive thoughts. If you’re ready, your internal work starts today. On this best-of episode, Dr. Barbour and I discuss EMDR therapy, the four foundations of mindfulness, how to physically move through trauma, healing shame, and how to know if you’re in constant fight or flight. We also touch on sex and pain, and mindfulness in and out of the bedroom. If you’ve ever considered therapy but are on the fence about it, I hope this episode gives you some encouragement – because healing emotional wounds can truly transform your sex life. Show Notes: More Dr Anadel Barbour: Website | Instagram | Twitter Sex In Sobriety by Dr Anadel Barbour More About EMDR Therapy Overcoming 4 Common Sex Fears Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ah, weddings. So ceremonial. So floral. After two years of postponements and cancellations, IRL weddings are back – but are all those newlyweds talking about their sex life? They probably should be! Married sex is full of tired, toxic cliches that I’m personally ready to bust. We don’t have to settle for absent or boring sex as we grow old together. So on today’s episode, I’m making the case for writing your sex vows before you walk down the aisle, helping you recreate honeymoon sex if you’ve been married for ages, and giving you a lay of the land culturally-speaking on how we’re thinking about sex and relationships now. Plus, I take your questions: how to navigate bisexuality in a straight marriage, what it means if you find yourself jealous at your friend’s weddings and how to bring back the spark…when the spark was a little dim in the first place. Show Notes: Ask Emily: Tips for French Kissing The Yes No Maybe List The Pleasure Planner Hinge Bumble Feeld #Open FetLife Skirt Club Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What cultural or religious programming do you have around sex? Even if you didn’t grow up in a church, sexual shame is – in so many ways – the air we breathe. But here’s the reality: you didn’t put those thoughts there. Someone else did. And on today’s show with guest Erin Tillman, we’re calling out those judgmental messages, and choosing the sex messaging that actually serves us. The result? A radically more authentic, more liberated sex life. As an inclusive dating coach, Erin is no stranger to shame – and she’s heard it all from her clients. Whether it was that one rude thing a partner said that haunted you for years, or a parent that told you masturbation was dirty, shame love to hide in the shadows…and hold you back in the bedroom. So on today’s show, Erin and I talk about how we healed our own sexual shame, dropped performative sex, and got comfortable with the word “no.” You’ll also learn the difference between “no” and “not yet” when it comes to dating, how to make good choices on dating apps, and how to flip your internal shame script. Show Notes: More Erin Tillman Website | Twitter | Instagram Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s a good time to expand our definition of sex. At the end of the day, sex is play for adults: it’s where we collaborate with another person, creating a momentary world of pleasure and eroticism with them. But so often, we assume that sex equals penetration, and here’s the problem with that: not everyone orgasms during penetration. Not everyone feels erotic during penetration! So let’s make sex more interesting and exploratory, shall we? On today’s show, I’m talking up all the different types of non-penetrative sex – like mutual masturbation, sensual massage, toys, hand stuff – to help you break out of a conventional sex script, and have sex that’s more tailored to your personality and desires. Because you never have to take penetration off the table entirely…but what would happen if you took it off the table for a little while? (Hint: probably more orgasms.) Show Notes: Prostate Play 101 Want to Try a Sex Cleanse? Penis Problems, Solved Shop with Emily 4 Ways to Close The Orgasm Gap First Date, First Orgasm, First Threesome Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How much do you know about your partner’s sexual language? Or your own sexual language? In this best of episode, sex educator, author and licensed therapist Jamye Waxman is here to talk about core erotic blueprints, sexual accelerators and brakes, and the sixth love language: space and freedom. Jamye and I talk through the communication skills you need to help your sexual connection thrive, because if resentment is the relationship killer…curiosity is the relationship healer. So in this show, you’ll learn how to turn your communication style from critical to curious, as you and your partner learn who you both are as erotic beings. Show Notes: For More Jamye Waxman: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook The Secrets to Better Sex? Talk About It More About Your Erotic Blueprint Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jenny Mollen is the author of City of Likes, a fictional comedy about mommy influencer culture and the intensity of female friendships – especially when one of them is a narcissist. Are they obsessed with each other? Do they want to have sex with each other? And what do you do when someone’s perfectly-curated facade finally cracks? Jenny and I met years ago, and I know you’ll love her just as much as I do. Besides being a bestselling author, she’s also an actor, host of the hilarious “Third Wheel with Jenny Mollen” podcast, a mom, and wife to actor Jason Biggs. On this episode, she talks about the personal experiences with social media that inspired her book, why she wants to see a sex therapist, and helps me answer your sex and relationship questions. For example, if you’re in a relationship, is it ok to comment on someone else’s Instagram telling them how attractive they are? Jenny and I give it to you straight. Show Notes: For More Jenny Mollen: Podcast | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | Website Her New Book: City of Likes Overcoming 4 Common Sex Fears Am I Dating a Narcissist? W/ Dr Ramani Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s my strong belief that pleasure is the antidote to fear, now and always. But when it comes to sex, we really can be our own worst enemies: what if my new partner sees me naked, and decides to jet? What if I try out some dirty talk, and my partner laughs at me? What if I approach someone cute…and they say ‘no thank you’? Fear can be crippling to our sex drive – but it can also be digested and processed. To do that, we can check the facts, we can remember that most things aren’t personal, and we can talk about our fears out loud. (Meditation helps too!) So on today’s best of episode, I’m talking to you all about YOUR sex fears: period sex, sharing a fetish with a new partner, old traumas, fear that you’ll never get over an ex, and much more to help you live YOUR most free, sexually healthy life. Show Notes: The Secret to Better Sex? Talking About It Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shaun T is host of the podcast “Trust and Believe,” a world renowned fitness trainer, and a professional dancer. Not to mention a wonderfully sex positive man, but it was a journey – I repeat, a JOURNEY – to get there. On today’s show, Shaun T gives me his genius sex and arousal hacks, how he and his partner keep things interesting after 12 years and two kids, plus…his favorite kink. He also opens up about surviving childhood sexual assault, how he came to understand and accept his sexuality, and the trauma work he did to get to where he is today. Trust me: if you need an instant pick-me-up around your sex, sexuality, or your body, this is *the* conversation for you. Show Notes: More Shaun T: Podcast | Instagram | Website | Twitter | Youtube What’s Your Arousal Type? These Are the Five Arousal Styles. Which One Are You? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Despite their reputation as magical, mysterious events, orgasms are way more accessible than most of us realize, once we understand the science behind them. (And OK yeah, I admit – they’re pretty magical.) As everyone’s favorite muscle spasm, the orgasm is a series of contractions from your pelvic floor muscles, which all of us have, and all of us can strengthen. But what else sets you up for orgasmic success? What if you can experience one alone, but not with a partner? What if you can orgasm in your sleep, but not in waking life? And what if you want to experience different kinds of orgasm (like anal) or, want multiples? I say: be greedy with your orgasm and listen to this best of episode, where we answer all these O questions and more. Show Notes: 6 Kink Styles (& How to Explore Them) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you need to get in the mood for sex? Have a lively conversation? Be touched in a suggestive way? Put on something sexy…or, have your partner get dressed up for you? Today’s episode is all about arousal styles, and today, I’ll be looking at five. The science of sexual arousal is ever-evolving, but on this show I’m looking at some of the most common ways people get turned on (through conversation, visuals, touch, play or physical adventure), helping you ID what your style is, and what behaviors you can do in the moment to get it going. Kind of like love languages, but for sex. I’m also talking about the difference between arousal and desire, and, taking your questions! How to have sex when you’re stressed, anti-depressants numbing out your vulva, and if it’s OK to be more excited for masturbation than partnered sex. Show Notes: There Are 5 Arousal Styles. Which One Are You? Sex Up Your Love Language Tell Me About The Last Time You Had Sex w/ Ian Kerner The Yes No Maybe List You’re Kinkier Than You Think, Part 1 You’re Kinkier Than You Think, Part 2 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s one of the most common questions I get: how do I initiate sex the right way? Listen: there’s no one “right” way to initiate sex. But I’ll be honest, it might take a little warm up period to get everyone ready and on the same page. That’s because sex is just as much a head game as a body one, so in this episode, we’re helping you calm your nerves before initiation, recover from failed initiations, and walk into each sexual encounter with more confidence. At the end of the day, we all crave intimacy, and we all want to please our partners – and by the end of this episode, I think you’ll feel much more clear on how to arouse your partner. Show Notes: 6 Ways to Upgrade Your 69 She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does it mean exactly, when someone says they’re a voyeur? A sub? A cuckhold or an exhibitionist? It’s part 2 of our “You’re Kinkier Than You Think” series…and folks, we are getting a kinky education. On today’s episode, I’m walking you through your sexual fantasies to see where you land on the kink spectrum. I’m talking submission and domination, exhibitionism and voyeurism, even a little humiliation, if that’s your preferred kink flavor. But because kink is play, I’m also giving you some specific ideas for how to explore these fantasies IRL – and, bonus, I’m taking all of your kinky questions. Show Notes: Ask Emily: Kink and BDSM Ideas 6 Kink Styles (& How to Explore Them) You’re Kinkier Than You Think, Part 1 Coming Together w/ Celeste & Danielle Emily’s Shop Page How to Dom with Your Text Messages Kink & Casual Sex Justin Lehmiller The Communication Guide Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What would the world be like if we didn’t have shame about sex? Can you imagine how different your life would be, if you were told that sexual pleasure was healthy? If you were given the memo early on that masturbation was legit self-care, and that sex itself was joyful and good for you, rather than a one-way ticket to STI’s and unwanted pregnancy? Today’s best-of show is all about being the change we want to see in the world: becoming people who are conversant and comfortable discussing sex, because this is how we evolve people. Plus, I take your calls! Why using toys during sex is the literal best, what the hell a “lube shooter” is, and how to lovingly - persuasively - ask your partner for more oral. Show Notes: 6 Hottest Masturbation Moves Relax, It’s Just Anal w/ Dr. Hernando Chaves Seducing The Booty w/ Alicia Sinclair Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When you hear the words “BDSM” and “kink,” what comes to mind? Leather? Whips? The truth is, all of us are a little kinky – you may just not have realized it yet. That’s why today’s episode is part 1 of a two-part BDSM and kink education series, where I help demystify this world and give you fun, safe options for exploring. Dungeons optional. First, we’re defining our terms and getting a grasp on kink and BDSM – including, what the hell “BDSM” actually means. Next, we’re taking a look at core desires to help you identify yours, and talking about the psychology of power and play. Finally, I’m giving you some entry-level ways to bring kink to the bedroom, whether you’re coupled or single…and, answering all of your kinky questions. Show Notes: 6 Kink Styles (& How to Explore Them) Ask Emily: Kink and BDSM Ideas Coming Together w/ Celeste and Danielle The Yes No Maybe List 5 Easy Steps to Start Exploring The Communication Guide Kink & Casual w/ Justin Lehmiller 5 BDSM Games to Spice Up Your Sex Life Tonight BDSM: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink You’re Kinkier Than You Think, Part 2 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Whether it’s erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation or a slight penis curve, it’s common to have penis questions – especially when they’re affecting your sex life. But where do you go for answers? You come right here, to this informative convo between me and urologist Dr. Edward Karpman, as well as Jeff Abraham of Promescent. On this best-of show, we’re talking to you all about penis shockwave therapy, what to do when you can get erect (but aren’t climaxing), what to do when you take ED meds (but aren’t getting hard), and much more. Plus, I take your intimacy questions! How to get out of your head during sex, how to reduce anxiety in the run-up to intercourse, and how to effectively work with your penis as you get older. Show Notes: Missionary Sex Position - New and Improved For more Dr. Karpman: Website | Instagram For more information about Promescent: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’re a parent or caregiver, should you talk to your child about masturbation? Yes. You absolutely should, even if it’s awkward, even if your own parents didn’t talk about it with you. (And let’s be real: they probably didn’t.) But I get it – finding the words can be hard, especially for such a touchy subject. That’s why today’s episode is devoted entirely to giving you tools, scripts and resources to help you. First, I give you the big why: Why should you talk to your children, and teens specifically, about masturbation? I’ll give you several science-backed reasons why it’s wise to do so. Next, we’ll do some masturbation myth-busting, to help alleviate any concerns, on their part or yours, that it’s harmful or unhealthy. Great news: it’s not! And finally, I’ll walk you through how to have this conversation, with specific verbiage you can use to help put yourself and your child at ease. Don’t worry caregivers: I got you, and in this episode I’ll also answer your questions about teens and sex. Should you talk to your teen about ethical porn? What should you do if a teen daughter starts asking about sex toys? All this and more on today’s show. Show Notes: Sex Positive Families: Website | Instagram Dr Lanae St John: Book | On Sex with Emily Shafia Zaloom: Book | On Sex with Emily Cory Silverberg: Website What should I teach my high school-aged teen about sex and sexuality? Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 1) Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 2) The Communication Guide Big Mouth Sex Education Good Vibrations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On any given day, how do you talk about sex? Do you bone? Screw? Make love? According to my guest Amanda Montell, author of Wordslut, Cultish, and host of the podcast “Sounds Like a Cult,” the words we use to discuss sex reveals our attitudes about sex as a whole – even shaping the way we show up in the bedroom. In this fascinating best of episode, Amanda and I talk about sex slang and body part euphemisms, like the fact that we frequently cute-ify female genitals to make them less threatening. But before you go, “oh this is thinky academic stuff,” know this: practically-speaking, your sex life WILL improve as your communication improves. Listen in, as Amanda and I play with language to get the sex we want. For More Amanda Montell: Wordslut: A Feminist Guide to Taking Back the English Language Sounds Like a Cult Podcast | Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism Website | Instagram | Twitter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How exactly does masturbation help a sexual partnership? Let me count the ways… It’s Part 2 of our Masturbation Pro Tips series, and in today’s episode, we’re talking solo sex in the context of a relationship. I’m addressing some of the most common questions I get on the subject, such as: “if I already have a partner, why masturbate?” and: “if I masturbate in private, is it cheating?” We also discuss whether or not you should tell your partner if you masturbate, and touch briefly on porn addiction: starting with, is it real? Plus, I take your questions! How to set up your own “masturbation zone” when you live with a partner, whether it’s possible to have fantasy-free masturbation sessions, what to do if you can orgasm on your own but not with a partner, and much more. Show Notes: How to Find the Best Lube for You Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 1) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Missionary gets a bad rap. I’ve seen it called the “comfy sweater” of sex – and can we talk about the name? Not sexy. Almost…anti-sexy. But despite its label, I don’t think that’s why missionary is considered vanilla or boring. It’s simply the default position, the one a lot of us fall into automatically – making it easier for us to tune out, phone it in, and miss out on any potential eroticism. So on today’s episode, we’re going to make missionary more exploratory, as I address some of your common complaints. Such as: how do we make it more exciting? I’ll tell you all the reasons I love missionary, and give you technique tips to make it more surprising and fun. Next, vulva owners: are you having a hard time reaching orgasm in missionary? Of course you are: it’s not the prime position for clitoral stimulation, so I’ll offer position hacks that make it more pleasurable. Finally, is it possible to be kinky during missionary? Oh yeah: from bondage to dirty talk, we can leverage all that eye contact to turn it into the hot experience you crave. Show Notes: Missionary Sex Position - New and Improved The “Bottom” Line On Anal w/ Dr Evan Goldstein Pillo by Dame Position Breakdown: Doggy Style Vs Cat Position Magic Wand Mini Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Housewife turned billion-dollar co-founder Lisa Bilyeu is the picture of confidence: she’s got a thriving business, a partner she adores, and basically, is a literal boss. But she also overcame illness, insecurity, and massive relationship challenges to get where she is today. In her new book Radical Confidence, Lisa shares the lessons that changed her life, and helped her become the hero of her own story. On today’s show, I ask her about keeping the sexual spark alive in a longterm relationship, the “purgatory of the mundane,” and how to have a growth mindset with your partner. Show Notes: More: Radical Confidence More Lisa: Instagram How to Find The Best Lube for You Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So listen: is sex addiction real? We’ve all heard stories of infidelity followed by explanations of sex addiction as the reason for the behavior. But the truth is, just because someone cheats doesn’t mean they’re a sex addict. According to therapist Marnie Breecker from the Center for Relational Healing, sex addiction is indeed real: it’s an intimacy disorder with both emotional and physiological symptoms. On this best of show, Marnie and I talk about the common and compulsive behaviors of sex addiction, the deep human need for love and connection, affordable treatment options, love addiction, a how-to on IMAGO therapy (a great tool for communication) and healing steps for couples. Show Notes: More Marnie: Website | Instagram Sex Addicts Anonymous Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you know that masturbation helps you sleep better? Tones your pelvic floor? And – surprise – boosts your immunity? But let’s be honest: these aren’t exactly the main reasons people masturbate. You masturbate because it’s pleasurable, but as the OG form of self-care, masturbation delivers all kinds of benefits, physically and psychologically. That’s why today’s show kicks off a two-part masturbation series, and later in the month, we’ll look at how masturbation benefits a partnership. On today’s episode however, it’s all about YOU: common masturbation fantasies, how to mix up a stale masturbation routine, how to make your solo sex more erotic, and how to practice mindful masturbation. Plus, I take your questions! Can a vibrator desensitize your clitoris? All this and more on Part 1 of our Masturbation Pro Tips Series. Show Notes: Squirting Secrets w/ Deborah Sundhal The Sex with Emily Shop page Our Edging Guide Our Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There’s a misconception out there, that once women become moms, their sexiest years are OVER. But as my guest Dana Myers explains, that’s nonsense – and as a mom, she can prove it. Dana is the founder of sex and beauty brand Booty Parlor, but she’s also a wife and mother to two children. On today’s throwback show, she shares secrets from her book “The Mommy Mojo Makeover” to help women rediscover their sensual self-confidence, fall back in love with their bodies, and masturbate for self-care. We also talk about resentment in a relationship (and how to fix it), and why mothers deserve a sense of sexual entitlement. Yes moms: you deserve sexual pleasure! If you want more of it – or know a mom who might – this is a can’t miss conversation. For More Dana B Myers: Booty Parlor | Website | Instagram | Twitter | Youtube | Facebook Try Dana’s pheromone fragrance & use code DANA15 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times: communication is a lubrication. But today I’ve got the receipts: previous callers who took my communication advice called back, to give us a status report! On today’s best of show, I’m letting you listen in on my callers’ sex lives after they took the brave but vulnerable step of talking to their partners. We’ve got a longtime married couple, with a husband who wants more kink in bed; a success story of treating vaginal pain; a newlywed who brought BACK the spark with his man after incorporating role play, and a mom who never had any sex guidance growing up…and is now doing things radically different with her teen daughter. All of them are living proof that better sex starts with communication, so listen now, get inspired, and let their sex-cess motivate you to have a sex talk of your own. Show Notes: Emily’s Shop Page The Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Audio porn is one of the most brilliant sex tech innovations of the past few years. It’s immersive, discreet, and super intimate – you literally feel like you’re in the room with people who are having sex. Plus…it’s a great way to ratchet up your own dirty talk or your masturbation routine. So on today’s best of episode, I’m sharing my conversation with Caroline Spiegel, creator of Quinn: an audio erotica app that was one of the first to market. We talk about audio porn and solo sex, how to use audio erotica with a partner, and a special bonus! Caroline and I listen to some audio erotica together, including a guided masturbation clip. Plus, we take your questions like, enjoying porn as a blind individual, how to embrace a naturally sexy voice, and – wild card – can you really be allergic to semen? Find out on today’s show. More Try Quinn: Website | Apple App Store | Android App Store | Instagram | Twitter Show Notes: How Do I Explore Bisexuality While In a Relationship? The Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Just like going to the gym improves your body, going to therapy improves your mind. And bonus: couple’s counseling can radically improve your relationship and your sex life. So why do some people absolutely refuse to go? On today’s show, I’m giving you the therapy low-down, so you can decide whether you should try it – or, if it’s the right call for you and your partner. I’m talking: signs it’s time to look for a therapist, pros and cons of solo therapy vs. couple’s counseling, whether sex therapy is right for you, what to expect from a typical therapy session, and how to find therapy that works for you – including budget-friendly options. Plus, I take your therapy-related questions on porn addiction, sexual trauma and what to do if you tried to improve your sex life with your partner…but they cheated anyway. Show Notes: Ask Emily: My Wife Cheated American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists Book: The Body Keeps The Score Book: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone Maximize Your Orgasm w/ Dolly Josette Ask Emily How Do You Get Your Partner to Go to Therapy Book: So Tell Me About The Last Time You Had Sex Book: She Comes First Therapy for Black Girls Therapy for LatinX EMDRIA Best of: Coming Together w/ Celeste and Danielle Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When you’re desperate to fix your sex life with your partner, what do you do? (You call me, of course.) Maybe the sex started hot, but got real boring. Or maybe you and your crush are finally hooking up…but the sex is meh, and it’s a huge letdown. What now? On today’s Best Of hotline show, I’m sharing some of my favorite listener questions and letting you listen in as we talk through solutions. We’ve got sex-stonewalling partners. Compersion vs. cuckholding. A self-described “lazy lover.” Bisexuality, plus a squirting tutorial. Trust me, if you’ve got the right communication skills, you can talk through anything: and on this episode, I help you make those sex talks way less gnarly. Show Notes: Our Yes No Maybe List Emily’s Shop Page The Magic Wand The Womanizer Boston Scientific New Low T Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When it comes to sex, a lot of us have a movie in our head about the way it “should” go down. I should look a certain way. They should kiss me a certain way. We should have epic orgasms. In other words, picture perfect... But here’s the real real: you’re going to orgasm way easier – and more intensely – if you can get out of your head, and into your body. So on today’s show, I’m helping you have fully embodied sex using your five senses. Together we can remove the mental blocks from orgasm. If you're not turned on or inspired to have sex, these are sensory tools you can use to seduce yourself or your partner…and feel all the electric sensations leading up to the big O. Plus, I take your questions: how to talk dirty without swearing, how to bring back an MIA orgasm, how to stop disassociating during sex and much more. Show Notes: Ask Emily: How Do I Partner I’ve Been Faking Orgasms The Fin by Dame Podcast: Where Did My Orgasm Go? Our Communication Guide Talk Dirty to Me w/ Joanna Angel Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

To create our hottest, most fulfilling sex life, there’s one critical thing we need – and no, it’s not flavored lube. We need boundaries, and the ability to express them to others. But what is a “boundary,” exactly? As a buzzword and an emerging concept, boundaries can improve every relationship, sexual or otherwise. So on today’s best-of show, sex therapist, author and my dear friend Dr. Jennifer Freed and I help you figure out what your boundaries are, how to set them with others (and follow through), and how to NOT let people steamroll over your values…especially when you’re a people pleaser. For more Dr Jennifer Freed: Website | Instagram | Twitter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you actually want to feel during sex? On today’s best-of episode, my friends Celeste Hirshman & Danielle Harel, co-authors of Coming Together: Embracing Your Core Desires for Sexual Fulfillment and Long-Term Compatibility, help reveal your core desires – your personal, psychological motivation for having sex, and how to get that feeling in the moment. Celeste, Danielle and I talk about how sex can be a medicine for old wounds we felt growing up: whether you want to feel powerful, special, even degraded in bed – it all goes back to our personal history, and what we’re looking for when we have sex. We also talk about creating your hottest sexual movie, how to perform sexual breathing, and why – if you want sex to last in a long-term relationship – you really have to do this core desire work. It’s a can’t miss episode of sexual wisdom, whether you’re single, partnered, or simply want to know what gets you hot. For more Celeste, Danielle & Somatica Institute: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Youtube | Facebook Join the Fall 2022 Somatica Sex & Relationship Coach Training To Find a Coach Near You Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Here’s something wild: nearly half of people in monogamous relationships report they’ve had affairs, according to recent research. Half! And that’s just the people who admitted it. We can all agree that getting cheated on feels awful – as in, the literal worst. So why is it so common? In this episode, we’re talking trust and infidelity as we break down the reasons why people cheat, what to do if an affair has happened, and deciding whether to rebuild or break up and move on. Plus, I take your questions on trust and infidelity: how to restore your confidence after an affair, what to do if you suspect or just caught your partner cheating, and how to come back from online infidelity. Show Notes: Ask Emily: How Do I Tell My Partner I Don’t Like Something? The Gottmans on Compatibility, Conflict & Conversation For More Information on EMDR Therapy Tips for Better Communication Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So you’re ready to date. Fantastic! But are you feeling a little rusty on flirting? Making the first move? And, real talk: how’s your dating app profile? Today’s show is your dating primer 101, so you can walk into every date knowing exactly what you want: whether it’s a long-term partner, or a just-for-the-night hookup. I’m talking how to meet people, how to make sexy conversations, how to take your best dating app pics, and what people are looking for when they’re on a date. Plus, I take your questions! How to feel more confident saying “yes” to dates, how to express your intentions around sex, when to bring sex toys into the bedroom and much more. Show Notes: 15 Types of Sexuality and Attraction to Help You Understand Your Desire Style Friends with Benefits: A Guide Esther Perel’s Game: So Where Should We Begin? We’re Not Really Strangers Game The Gottman Institute’s Game The Magic Wand Emily’s Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When it comes to relationships across the board – from sex, to work, to friendships – do you actually know what impression you’re having on others? Especially when you first meet someone? In this best of show, I’m throwing it back to my conversation with fellow podcaster Jordan Harbinger, who gets real on social behaviors and the power of body language. Jordan and I talk about the difference between authenticity and hustling, confidence while dating, and the shocking power of nonverbal communication. He coaches us on developing open, positive body postures, and helps all of us walk into a room with charisma and curiosity. For More Jordan Harbinger Website | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | Youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there a vulva owner in your life you’d love to treat? By giving them the best oral sex of their life? You’ve come to the right place. Whether or not you’re with someone currently, or simply want to brush up on your oral skills for the future, it’s never a bad time to sharpen your pleasure techniques. After the blow job episode I did earlier this month I promised that you’d get an oral sex show specifically for vulvas – and it’s here. In today’s episode, I’m talking you through everything you need to know to deliver A+ oral sex, specifically for vulvas. I’m teaching how to tease, how to use your tongue, how to perform the Kivin method, and how to stimulate the famous G-spot. Plus, I take your questions! What to do if you desperately want oral but your partner isn’t too keen on giving. How to let go of potential insecurities and truly enjoy receiving. What to do when your hygiene concerns are getting in the way of pleasure, How to reduce discomfort while giving. Plus, how to give your partner pointers on what you like and tips for a squirting experience. Show Notes: The Most Common Problems for Vulvas Mind-Blowing Oral Sex in Under 5 Minutes: The Kivin Method Emily’s Shop Page Ask Emily: How Do I Go Down On a Vulva? The Vulva Gallery Squirting Secrets w/ Deborah Sundahl Ask Emily: How Do I *Actually* Start Squirting? Tips for Better Communication Guide The Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Breakups completely, fundamentally suck – full stop. Especially if you’re still connected to the person: you still live together, you share friends, or…you can’t stop fantasizing about them sexually. And that’s because breakups function exactly like withdrawal: this other person was a drug of sorts, and now, you can’t get your hit. But breakups also teach us a lot about ourselves, especially if that person was annoyingly awesome in bed. So in this episode, we’re looking at the psychology of breakups, empowering ways to cope and move on, and most importantly, how to keep nurturing your sexuality while you heal. Plus, I take your questions! How to move on from a hookup partner who’s not ready for a relationship, what it means when you’re sexting with an ex, how to do the friendship custody battle after a breakup, and how to break up when you know it’s the right thing to do…but you’re terrified to do it. Show Notes: 7 Steps to Breakup Recovery Podcast More About EMDR Therapy The Yes No Maybe List Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you are someone who had substandard sex ed as a young person (all of us?), you are going to love this throwback episode with Gil Ozeri, comedian, actor, and writer for the very popular show “Big Mouth”. Growing up with adults who avoided the sex talk like the plague, Gil discusses the shame that can result...shame a lot of us still carry. That’s why “Big Mouth” (now in Season 5 on Netflix) takes the awkward experience of adolescence, demystifies it, and helps all of us get the answers we wish we’d gotten back then — while being super funny. If you’ve got a young person in your life, this episode is a must-listen. Gil and I take a dive into our own hormonal teen years, how to make sex ed more relatable, and tips for post-baby sex…because why not? I also take your questions: how to give a better blowjob, how to make FaceTime sex hot, and how to get your sexual connection back after the spark has died. For More Gil Ozeri: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Youtube | TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I am joined by Violet Benson, host of the new podcast Almost Adulting and creator of the wildly popular Instagram account @DaddyIssues_. Over the last couple of years, Violet has become well known for her irreverent relationship and dating advice. In this interview, Violet reveals why she has stopped dating (for now), what exactly a “pick me girl” is and how attraction is not always dependent on good looks. And because this is a sex show after all, Violet shared some tips for avoiding potentially embarrassing moments in the bedroom. This is a good one! For More Violet: Almost Adulting Podcast Meme Instagram | Personal Instagram | Podcast Instagram Twitter | Facebook | Youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re talking about blow jobs. It’s an oral sex masterclass, and you’re invited.On today’s episode, I’m sharing everything you need to know about oral sex on a penis. Also, I take your blow job questions: where to start as a beginner, how to enjoy receiving, what to know when pleasuring an uncircumcised penis and what to do if you’re struggling to swallow. Don’t blow off this episode. Together, we can bring your oral sex game to the next level. Show Notes: Everybody Loves Oral 6 Oral Sex Tips for Going Down On a Vulva Mind-Blowing Oral Sex in Under 5 Minutes: The Kivin Method How to Give A Better BJ Skyn Condoms Emily’s Shop Page Breathe App Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A great sext is all about anticipation…kind of like foreplay: And as the 21st century way to talk dirty, sexting — when executed well — can be super hot. Sexting is an art form, and in this show, I give you pro tips for perfecting yours. Because let’s face it: randomly sending a bunch of squirting emojis might not be as sexy as it is confusing, for the person on the other side. As with everything in life, good sexting comes down to emotional intelligence, so let’s talk shop. This episode is designed to help you send your best sext, and excite the person receiving your message. Plus, I take your questions! How to start flirting online, how to manage your devices so your messages don’t accidentally end up in the wrong place and how to have good phone sex in a long distance relationship. Finally, the Sex With Emily community has delivered, and I’m sharing YOUR hottest sexts. Show Notes: Talk Dirty To Me w/ Joanna Angel Signal Messenger What’s app Amorus App We-Vibe Toys Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let the pulsations begin, because today’s episode is a love letter to your orgasm – and all the ways we can dose your body with pleasure. First, we’re helping you understand, anatomically, just what the hell is going on with the big O. And for my never-had-an-orgasm friends we’re going to give you techniques to help you get there. Finally, we’re offering tricks to elevate your orgasm, with everything from easy hacks to long-term rituals, to achieve the deep pleasure you crave. Plus we take all your orgasm questions! What to do when you can’t orgasm with your partner, how to break the habit of faking orgasms, how to bring back an orgasm that’s suddenly disappeared, and how to achieve the holy grail of multiple O’s. Show Notes: Shop w/ Emily The Womanizer We-Vibe Toys Dame Products The Edging Guide Je Joue Kegel Ball Set Biohack Your Orgasm w/ Alisa Vitti Bellesa Try Quinn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices