Securely Attached

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 4:12 - The quick 101 on attachment theory - it's most simple definition. 7:29 - Understanding the difference between making bad choices and having unhealthy romantic relationships versus having an attachment disorder. 10:12 - If a person does have an avoidant insecure attachment style, what can they do not to pass down this attachment style? 11:39 - The importance of attunement in attachment. 13:40 - Being intentional in your approach to parenting can help anchor you and prevent you from being so reactive in the moment. 18:13 - There are many relationships that come together to form a child's attachment blueprint - so you don't need to put so much pressure on yourself! ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Using the end of the night to help a child unwind, make sense of the day, and prepare for what's to come tomorrow can be a valuable tool for shifting their brain and body into a state of rest. Joining me to talk about how parents can use the last 20 minutes of the day to promote social and emotional learning is the author of the children's book series, Conscious Stories, Andrew Newman. Helping our child to feel safe and connected to us just before it's time for them to drift off into sleep can have a huge impact on their ability to successfully fall asleep and stay asleep and on their overall mental wellbeing. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 1:49 - What should consequences for my child be when there are no natural or logical consequences that are easy to identify? 4:05 - Understanding the developmental difference between your child being able to intellectually comprehend something versus their ability to inhibit an impulse. 7:41 - Helping your child keep their autonomy while teaching them a new rule to maintain safety might mean you have to supervise them for a while. 10:37 - I told my child not to do something, they did it anyway, what should the consequence be? Should I punish them? 12:58 - Parents are often afraid of using consequences in a gentle parenting philosophy—but there is an appropriate time and use for consequences. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

>> Click here to watch for my FREE masterclass, From Battles to Bonding: Overcoming Power Struggles! And gain insights and tools that can lead to a more peaceful and enjoyable parenting experience, free of daily power struggles! Knowing what to do, when, and how is a challenge in parenting! If you're doing the right thing, but at the wrong time, you may be left questioning your methods and feeling like you're failing in parenting. Here to help moms and dads learn how to be most effective in their parenting is the founder of Curious Neuron, neuroscientist Dr. Cindy Hovington. Learning how to decipher the cues from your unique child, understand their temperament and nervous system, and be nimble in adapting your strategies for different situations and emotions are key elements in finding the ease in parenthood. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 6:22 - How to allow sensitive children to feel seen and understood, without making them shut down or feel uncomfortable with too much direct attention. 7:17 - Behavioral interventions to use with sensitive kids when they are fully dysregulated and as they start to cool down. 9:05 - Being intentional about using structures and systems preemptively so sensitive children understand expectations and can predict what will happen next. 15:56 - While this may sound like it take a lot of time and attention, in the end it's easier than managing the meltdown. 20:31 - Things will come up that you can't anticipate, and that's where theses strategies of recognizing, validating, redirecting, and recovering are helpful. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

>>> HEAD HERE TO GRAB THE FREEBIE FOR THIS EPISODE: Your Step-By-Step Guide for How to Change Your Child's Behavior in Just 3 Weeks! Want to learn how to change your child's behavior in just 3 weeks? In this episode, I am breaking down the 10 simple steps I teach to the families in my clinical practice to help them make small shifts to their own behavior that will result in some big changes in their child. Plus, download my interactive workbook for an easy-to-follow, customized game plan you can use to start seeing meaningful change leading to more cooperation and family harmony!

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:18 - You are not alone! Kids holding it together all day with other people and melting down with us is very common (and healthy, even!) 2:57 - How to make transitions smoother to help reduce dysregulation when children get home. 7:26 - Children do behave differently with different caregiver and parents respond differently to different children. This is typical and normal, but there are shifts we can make to interrupt these patterns if they're not working for the family. 11:55 - Reframing your interpretation of your child's big emotions as a necessary release, rather than a problem that needs to be fixed. 14:30 - The interpretation that your child is messiest with your because they feel safest with you may be true and validating, but it doesn't mean they feel unsafe with you if the inverse is the case. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Do you feel like you are constantly ping-ponging between two extremes—throwing around your authority and overpowering your child or feeling like they're running the show? Jen Lumanlan, the creator of Your Parenting Mojo and the author of the new book, Parenting Beyond Power: How to Use Connection and Collaboration to Transform Your Family—and the World, is helping parents learn how to embark on a journey towards harmonious family life and a better world! Say goodbye to time-outs, countdowns, and punishments that perpetuate power imbalances. Instead, embrace empathetic listening, understanding your child's needs, and collaborative problem-solving. The result? Parents no longer feel like martyrs and children's behavioral problems often start to decrease. If you're ready to transform your family life while shaping a brighter future for your children, then this episode is a must-listen! I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:24 - How this current generation is working to lessen the stigma of having learning difficulties or a neurodiverse brain by approaching it as a difference rather than a deficit. 4:20 - How parents can be collaborative with their child's school to help them feel comfortable getting support in the classroom. 7:26 - Understanding a child's genetic history can empower parents to make specific choices (proactively and in the moment) based on that unique knowledge. 9:02 - Teaching your child to use, "I'm the type of person who..." statements can help them approach the things that are challenging for them without judgment. 15:29 - How comparing an invisible disability (like ADHD, OCD, anxiety, etc.) with physical disabilities can help children feel comfortable accepting support. 18:45 - Modeling coping skills by talking about your unique brain, body, and your process in navigating mental or physical differences without infusing shame. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

We all want our children to succeed. But, the way they get there can feel counterintuitive to many parents and mainstream parenting approaches. We need to let our kids stumble, let them make mistakes, and allow them to struggle a bit. Here to help parents understand how to support their child's autonomy in a way that promotes family harmony is psychologist and author of Autonomy-Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent, Confident Children, Dr. Emily Edlynn. From allowing for boredom, teaching our children to find balance, tuning into their intrinsic motivation, and giving them space to learn their body's cues, this episode will help you harness the power of treating your child with respect. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:37 - What is a "spicy" kid and how is that a more positive term than "sensitive" or "highly emotional"? 4:05 - What is the difference between continuum and categorical and how does this apply to these highly reactive kids. 4:54 - Helping kids who easily go to feelings of shame while setting limits. 8:32 - Teaching our children the difference between shame and guilt and how this can be a beneficial parenting tool to use with the children that quickly go to a place of shame. 12:08 - Create opportunities for your child to feel a sense of mastery, in control, self-confident, and proud by inviting them to participate in tasks you know they can excel at. 19:31 - Try using the terms "safe" or "unsafe" rather than "good/bad" or "mean/nice" when describing your child's behaviors. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Addressing the root cause of our children's physical and mental health challenges, rather than just treating the symptoms, can allow the human body to function as it should and positively impact energy, mood, and overall feelings of wellness. Joining me to discuss the benefits of taking a holistic and integrative approach to pediatric medicine is Dr. Pejman Katiraei, a board-certified pediatrician and the co-founder of WholisticMinds. We'll explore how physiological and environmental factors like mold, Lyme, and other toxins can impact children's bodies leading to behavioral issues, and what this understanding means for the diagnosis and treatment in children of things like autism, ADHD, OCD, anxiety, depression, and more. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

>>> Download my FREE Mental Health Postpartum Checklist that walks you through creating a personalized mental health support system and allows you to feel more confident and relaxed, knowing you have a plan for whatever your unique postpartum experience may be. Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 1:44 - Setting yourself up with a postpartum support system (like a therapist, night nurse, postpartum doula, etc.) that is most aligned with your unique needs. 4:21 - Before you come home with your new baby ask yourself the questions: What are my vulnerabilities? What do I anticipate being challenging for me? 6:46 - Understanding the typical and appropriate biological changes that occur in pregnancy and postpartum. 8:09 - Be proactive—don't wait until you're in crisis to reach out to a therapist or your support system. 11:04 - Psychologists who specialize in postpartum care can serve as a hub for your full support team and collaborate with your primary therapist, psychiatrist, OB/GYN, etc. to provide you with comprehensive care. 13:44 - Holistic and non-therapeutic approaches you can take to support your anxiety levels in pregnancy and postpartum. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

As children grow, their friendships become increasingly more important to them and are an integral part of their developing sense of self, of relationships, and how they fit into this world. Helping them learn to understand, process, and manage the multitude of emotions that come with early peer relationships can have a major impact on their development and mental health. Here to talk about the way children make, maintain, and nurture friendships is Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore. Eileen is a psychologist, friendship expert, and co-author of Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids. From properly interpreting social cues, to managing conflict, and teasing and bullying, this episode will help parents gain a deeper understanding of what it means to be a kid today and how we can best support our children as they navigate social interactions. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 5:38 - How to determine what is driving your child's desire to quit an activity. 6:15 - Weighing the pros and cons between letting your child quit (and potentially not learning to persist, make a commitment, and tolerate struggle) versus not letting them quit and forcing them to do something that may no longer be serving them 7:05 - Determining the parameters around when and how you allow them to stop an activity. 9:38 - "The goal, and how we're going to respond to this, is to explore it rather than fix it." 15:18 - How to separate our own expectations and desires from what we project onto our children. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

The care we provide for mothers, helping them to feel seen and supported, not only changes the way they internalize their self worth, but the trajectory of the perceived value they internalize and pass along to their children. Joining me in this episode is Chanel Porchia-Albert, the founder and Chief Executive Director of Ancient Song Doula Services and activist in the fight for birth equality for all, regardless of race, location, or socio economic status. Together we'll help all expecting or soon-to-be expecting new parents know more about their options, learn what questions to ask of themselves and their doctors, and what exactly to consider to help them feel most cared for during their pregnancy and birth experience. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:15 - The perceptiveness of toddlers and why kids often know more than we realize. 5:26 - How to explain to a toddler in a simple, honest, and developmentally appropriate way that there is no longer a baby in Mommy's belly. 7:48 - The specific words and language that is best to use with toddlers (and what we want to try to avoid) when telling them about the loss of a baby. 13:06 - How to help ease a child's anxiety after a conversation about loss or death. 16:33 - Understanding behavioral changes that may occur when a child is processing grief and how these themes can emerge in their play. 20:02 - Recognizing why certain behavioral shifts may be happening and the benefit of acknowledging them directly with your child. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Navigating baby sleep advice? Neuroscientist Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum cuts through the noise on sleep training, bed sharing, and contact sleep. This episode uncovers the neuroscience of sleep for infants and toddlers, helping parents make informed decisions without judgment. Understand why night waking is normal, how responsiveness shapes your baby's brain, and the true impact of sleep interventions on child sleep development. Empower your postpartum parenting with science-backed insights for a more peaceful family sleep journey. Together we explore: Understanding Baby Sleep: Learn why infant sleep cycles differ from adult sleep, and that night waking in babies is a normal physiological and developmental process. Sleep Training Neuroscience: Discover how sleep training primarily alters a baby's signaling behavior rather than significantly increasing total sleep duration, based on recent video studies. Responsive Parenting & Brain Development: Explore how parental responsiveness to a baby's cues shapes their brain's threat circuitry, fostering a crucial association between sleep and safety. Navigating Sleep Training Methods: Understand the wide range of sleep training techniques, from "cry it out" to more "gentle" approaches like Ferber, and their implications for infant regulation. Safe Bed Sharing Practices: Get crucial information on how to safely practice bed sharing, a common but often unguided parental behavior, to avoid dangerous alternatives like sleeping on couches. Parental Anxiety & Sleep: Discuss how societal pressures around baby sleep can significantly contribute to maternal and postpartum anxiety, emphasizing the importance of individualized, shame-free choices. The Power of Connection in Sleep: Learn how contact sleep and close proximity can regulate both baby and parent, building strong bonds and optimizing brain architecture even during sleep. Repairing Past Sleep Choices: Gain compassionate guidance on how parents who have previously sleep-trained can still redouble down on nurturing and connection, knowing the brain continually benefits from secure attachment. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 👉🏻 https://www.nurture-neuroscience.com 📚 The Nurture Revolution: Grow Your Baby's Brain and Transform Their Mental Health through the Art of Nurtured Parenting 📷 Follow @nurture_neuroscience_parenting on Instagram CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 94. Toddler sleep: Why it's different than infant sleep and how to use the attachment relationship to help them fall asleep, with Eileen Henry 🎧 254. Back by popular demand: Attachment theory and fostering secure attachment relationships 🎧 244. Understanding parental dysregulation: How to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton Click here to read the full transcript Dr. Greer (00:00:00): In sleep, that's where their brain is building. That's where the circuits are building. They're consolidating all their information and while they have the safety signals of their caregivers during sleep, when they can smell, you touch you. All of these things, babies sleep longer because they're not experiencing this higher level of stress. Dr. Sarah (00:00:29): It is impossible to Google the words "baby sleep" without being completely inundated with a barrage of sleep training ads and methods, all claiming to do a gentlest fastest best. But what does the science and the research actually show about effective and healthy sleep training and how it impacts our children, our infants and parents? I am so thrilled to have neuroscientist, doula and the author of the book, The Nurture Revolution: Grow Your Baby's Brain and Transform Their Mental Health Through the Art of Nurtured Parenting, Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum back on the podcast to talk about the science of sleep. We are not, I repeat. We are not going to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Our goal in this episode is only to equip you with all the information that you need to have so that you are able to make informed decisions about what is best for you and your unique family with no shame, no judgment, no pressure, and no fear. I hope that that is helpful. (00:01:46): Hi, I'm Dr. Sarah Bren, a clinical psychologist and mom of two. In this podcast, I've taken all of my clinical experience, current research on brain science and child psychology and the insights I've gained on my own parenting journey and distilled everything down into easy to understand and actionable parenting insights so you can tune out the noise and tune into your own authentic parenting voice with confidence and calm. This is Securely Attached. (00:02:25): Hey everyone. You are going to recognize my guest. If you have listened to our previous episode, I am thrilled because Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum is back today to talk about the neuroscience of sleep and sleep learning and sleep training and all the things. And I'm so glad you're here. Thanks for coming. Dr. Greer (00:02:47): Thank you. Thank you so much. I always

>> Do you need support coparenting your child with your ex? Reach out to Upshur Bren Psychology Group to schedule a free consultation call to learn more about the individualized treatment options. Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:03 - The quality of the attachment in every relationship is different. Kids can have a secure attachment bond to you and a more insecure relationship with someone else and still internalize the positive benefits of secure attachment. 6:16 - Handling parenting with a partner or an ex who has a parenting style that is misaligned from your own. 9:25 - Assessing the varying degrees of animosity or amicability in deciphering how to communicate with an ex partner about your child's feelings. 9:49 - Bringing in a therapist can be helpful to have information coming from an objective party and can lead to less of an emotional response. 14:45 - How to be the safe place for your child when they are experiencing difficulty. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

How do you know whether your child has selective mutism or is just shy in certain situations? Joining me today to discuss selective mutism—an anxiety disorder that is characterized by the inability or refusal to speak in certain situations, despite being capable of speech in other settings—is Dr. Carmen Tumialan Lynas. Dr. Tumialan Lynas is a clinical psychologist and anxiety specialist and the founder of Advanced Therapeutic Solutions. Recognizing the symptoms of selective mutism (SM) is crucial in order to provide appropriate support. If you think your child may have SM, you won't want to miss this episode that covers what to look out for and how to help children so they can overcome their communication challenges and thrive! I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:30 - The importance of mindfulness and pausing long enough to notice and express when we are grateful. 6:21 - Setting realistic expectations - you can be teaching gratitude and not have grateful kids all the time, and that's okay. 7:50 - The difference between being spoiled or entitled and having desires. 12:26 - How to handle our own triggers when we feel like our child is being spoiled. 14:00 - What the availability bias is and how it impacts our kids. 20:45 - Proactive responsibilities are opportunities to teach appreciation, value, and perspective. 25:00 - Understanding privilege. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

How does the way we treat our children affect the makeup of their brains? And how can we use this knowledge to raise children in a style that optimizes their physical, emotional, and mental health? That is precisely what Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum shares in her new book, The Nurture Revolution. From exploring the neuroscience of nurturing to understanding how early caregiving experiences influence our relationships as adults, Dr. Kirshenbaum offers profound insights that can shape how we think about respectful parenting with children of any age. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:07 - Does playing with Barbies cause children to have an unrealistic body image? 8:01 - Do millennials carry a stigma around Barbies that is not accurate to the way they are being portrayed now? 8:58 - Is it beneficial to ban any toys, or is it better to use these toys as a conversation starter? 10:45 - How can you initiate a conversation with your child that can negate some of the negative effects of playing with thin dolls, unrealistic ideas of gender norms, and stereotypes. 18:40 - What other factors regarding self-esteem and body image are more important for parents to keep in mind rather than if they should or shouldn't let their child play with Barbies. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

When it comes to healthy eating habits, it's essential to focus on balance and trust rather than strict rules or restrictions - which for many of us, is the exact opposite of the way we were raised. Amelia Sherry, registered dietitian/nutritionist and the author of Diet-Proof Your Daughter, is joining me today to talk about ways parents can make this mindset shift in order to support and nurture their child's healthy relationship to food. Throughout today's episode, we'll explore the role parents play in shaping a child's body image and feelings toward food, and offer you some practical tips for fostering healthy eating habits and reducing mealtime power struggles with your own children. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 1:11 - What actually is the proper scientific definition of fight-or-flight? 3:30 - What is the difference between being mad and being in fight-or-flight? 6:13 - The first step: Simple physiological interventions you can take to decrease your stress levels. 12:58 - The power of slowing down. 16:35 - Reflecting on why you are being triggered so you can zoom out and shift some of the patterns. 22:37 - Even if you do lose your temper, you can always go back and repair. (Go to drsarahbren.com/lost-my-temper for a workbook that teaches you exactly how to reconnect, repair & rebuild trust after you lose your cool.) ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Having a baby in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) comes with a wide range of emotions and experiences that can be challenging for new parents to navigate. And many feel like they're facing this challenge alone. The founders of NICU Nook, Dr. Stephanie Simon and Amanda Neilan, are working to change that! This episode is filled with encouragement and support with expert advice and practical strategies to help you and your baby thrive. You'll learn strategies for navigating the NICU and cultivating a secure attachment bond that will endure beyond the hospital walls. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:38 - What is serve and return and how does it impact our baby's brain development? 6:02 - The human brain is hardwired to have dynamic interpersonal exchanges. 8:19 - It's not about the "stuff" it's about the relationships. 8:27 - Why "safety" is the first step for allowing your child to explore their world, develop cognitively, and shapes the structures of the brain. 12:31 - Are enrichment classes beneficial for brain development? 18:02 - What are the many possible functions of these enrichment classes? 20:54 - Giving kids the opportunity to solve problems in daily life is incredibly valuable - and free! ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

The constant pressure to do it all (and do it all perfectly, I might add) is just one of the reasons parents are finding themselves so burnt out. We are so go, go, go that we often forget to stop and assess what is working, what isn't working, and how we can be intentional about using the time we do have to raise our children with the values that we find most important. Here to help parents learn to manage and prioritize their time is the author of Thursday is the New Friday, Joe Sanok. If you're feeling overwhelmed and overworked, you won't want to miss this episode with brain hacks you can use to be more efficient with your time, tools for assessing where to put the time you do have, and strategies to help you decide what can be flexible and what needs firm boundaries to be set–whether in the home, at work, or within your relationships. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:05 - The guidelines we use and the questions we ask to determine whether or not we allow our own kids to have a sleepover with their friends. 5:11 - Why knowing the formal questions about body safety, firearm safety, etc. can keep your child safe, even if you don't choose to explicitly ask them. 10:57 - It's not about one thing, but all the things that together serve to help create a safer environment. 12:29 - What are the benefits of allowing your child to have a sleepover? 17:01 - Assessing your child's personal developmental readiness. 21:07 - At what age are most kids developmentally able to handle a sleepover? 24:44 - Addressing bullying (before and after) slumber parties. 31:23 - How one-on-one sleepovers can help children create connections and break into friend groups. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Secure and insecure attachment styles aren't good or bad, they simply are. It can be tempting to label these things, but with that can come shame, guilt, and anxiety. Here to help dispel some myths about attachment science and offer parents strategies for building their own ability to help their child feel understood and safe is Dr. Tanya Cotler. Together we'll help listeners learn to zoom out to identify patterns and offer suggestions for deepening the parent-child bond, while factoring in family history, the human brain and body, and the importance of reflective functioning. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:48 - What to think about and how to decide when it's time to start moving away from the pacifier. 7:11 - What age would we recommend parents stop letting their child use a pacifier to help them self-soothe. 9:30 - Should you slowly ween or should you take the pacifier away cold turkey? 17:23 - Practical strategies to use (and what not to do) when you decide it's time. 18:56 - How to prepare the environment to make this an easier transition. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Big kids can mean big problems. As tweens and teens start to find their independence and exert their autonomy, parents may feel a little lost as they face new challenges. One of the best ways to break through is to learn how to communicate with your growing child in a way that helps you both to feel seen, understood, respected, and appreciated. Joining me to offer parents tools to do just that is the author of the book Courageous Conversations: A guide for parents to understand and connect with their teen, Elizabeth Bennett. Whether your child is already at this stage, or you just want to lay the groundwork from the start, my conversation with Elizabeth will offer parents strategies for helping your child to feel safe being open and honest with you, no matter how old they are right now. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

New parenthood is full of challenges, twists, and turns. But particularly for men who were raised by single mothers, becoming a father can sometimes feel like they are forced to forge a new path without having a roadmap for how it's done. Joining me today to talk about his own experience of becoming a dad and the lessons he learned is the author of Rookie Father, Kendall Smith. So whether you're a dad who is feeling like you are still a "rookie" at this whole parenting thing, or a mom who could use a little peek into the inner mind of your partner, in honor of Father's Day this weekend, I hope you join us as we celebrate the profound, important, and fun contribution that father's have on their children's lives! I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Whether you are in a fully codependent relationship or not, there can be subtle things people do in romantic relationships, with friends, and within a parent-child relationship that can heighten aspects of codependency. Here to help parents spot the signs of codependency (whether in yourself or in your partner in parenting) and teach you strategies and behaviors to help you create a more healthy and secure relationship with your child is self-proclaimed "Codependent Perfectionist" and LMHC Alana Carvalho. In this episode we'll define what codependency is, the emotional burden it can place on our children, and practical steps we can take to break free of this pattern and foster healthier relationships. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Janet Lansbury was talking and blogging about respectful parenting long before it became a buzzword. Informed by her mentor and RIE creator Magda Gerber, Janet has spent decades encouraging parents and teaching them how to create loving and supportive environments for their children to help them grow into compassionate, confident, and resilient individuals. Whether you are a follower of the RIE (resources for infant educarers) parenting method and wondering how these principles centered on respect and trust can evolve as your child grows, or you are just looking to find a parenting approach that feels aligned with your values - this episode will empower you to view your child as a whole, capable being, with just as much to teach us as we have to teach them. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Becoming a grandparent is typically embraced by society as a joyous event filled with all the love and much less of the responsibility that comes with parenthood. However, in reality, the identity shifts that occur when parents become grandparents are complicated, with a mix of highs and lows. And with this so rarely discussed, new grandparents (and new parents) can feel blindsided and struggle to know how to navigate the complexities of this transition. Joining me today to have a full and honest conversation about what it means to become a grandparent, from both a personal and a clinical level, is Licensed Mental Health Counselor and grandmother of 2, Carol Merle- Fishman. This episode is an ideal listen for both parents and grandparents — tackling generational differences, how to understand each other's perspectives, and strategies for approaching complicated family dynamics with a deeper sense of compassion and empathy. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Does attachment security impact our perception of our appearance and whether or not we have a positive or negative body image? Are mothers, consciously or unconsciously, passing down their own internalized feelings about weight and worth to their daughters? And how is social media impacting the way teen girls view themselves? These important questions are what Dr. Miriam Steele is working to answer in her vast research in the field of attachment theory. Teens today are struggling. As parents, being conscious and aware of the scientific findings and strategies we can use to support our children—from childhood into adolescence—is vital for helping them get through tough times and learn to combat feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, and depression. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Understanding attachment theory can give parents an amazing insight into why things are happening in their relationship with their child. But simply knowing this information is one thing—learning the tools we can use to increase the likelihood of our child forming a secure attachment bond is entirely another. I am honored to be joined today by Dr. Miriam Steele, a pioneer in attachment research who is here to help parents move beyond the theory to understand exactly what to do to raise our children with a focus on emotional wellbeing and mental health. Dr. Steele will share her story, the basics of secure and insecure attachment styles, and how a term called "reflective functioning" is the key to breaking intergenerational cycles of insecure attachment patterns and of promoting healthy development in our children. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Getting proper sleep as a new parent can have a huge impact on your mental health and subsequently the health of your infant. But in order for you to get good stretches of sleep, you need your little one to get into a healthy rhythm. Joining me today to talk about establishing healthy sleep patterns based on our knowledge of child development and biology is Certified Infant and Child Sleep Consultant, founder of My Sleeping Baby, and mother of 3, Eva Klein. So whether you're already in your postpartum period or still pregnant and feeling anxiety anticipating those sleepless nights, this episode is one you won't want to miss. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

It's Securely Attached's 100th episode! To celebrate, this week's show is a deep dive into what this podcast is all about - how understanding the basics of attachment science and child development can make parenting easier and more enjoyable. I'll give you a crash course in attachment science, dispel the misinterpretations that can make parents feel anxious or guilty, and offer concrete tips for more accurately attuning to your child, which can help them to form a secure attachment bond and promote mental wellness within your child and yourself. Whether this is your first episode with me or you've been here for the full 100, I just want to share a heartfelt thank you. I could not have made it this far in this labor of love without you tuning in, sharing your questions and words of encouragement with me, and passing this resource on to fellow parents. It's been such a privilege to be in your ears every week for the past 100 weeks—here's to 100 more! ✨ I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

I am celebrating Earth Day by sitting down with stylist Liz Teich to talk fast fashion, sustainability, our excess of clutter, and how we can model living a more sustainable and green lifestyle for our children. With practical tips for making your wardrobe last longer, to suggestions for carefully curating the pieces and toys in your home, this episode will be the perfect way for you to kick off thinking about manageable shifts you can make to take care of the planet this Earth Day and beyond. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

If the brain is always growing and developing, how can we measure intelligence on a single test? And are there ways in which our intelligence is affected by our DNA, our genes, and our environment? Joining me today to talk about the genetics behind our intelligence and what the research says about what standardized testing is actually measuring is the author of Rethinking Intelligence, Dr. Rina Bliss. We'll discuss how and why we measure intelligence in our society and offer parents suggestions for what they can do to support their children as they navigate the education system today. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

In honor of World Autism Month I am speaking with an expert in the field of autism treatment and the author of the new book, Hidden Brilliance: Unlocking the Intelligence of Autism, Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel. Whether your child has Autism or not, her strength-based approach that uses a child's natural interests to drive their motivation and help them tap into their full potential will resonate with parents of children with both neurodiverse and neurotypical brains. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Eve Rodsky's Fair Play method has swept the nation and become a cultural phenomenon. By being intentional about how we definite our roles, rebalancing our to-do list, and feeling aligned with our partners, we are able to challenge societal norms to find a fair balance of the mental load of parenthood that works best for us. Joining me this week is certified Fair Play method facilitator and LMSW, Lauren A. Tetenbaum. This episode will help you catalog and understand your unique needs and offer you a framework for communicating them to your partner-in-parenting so that you can strengthen your bond and the feeling of equity and connection within your relationship. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Every postpartum is different! So whether this is your first time being pregnant or you have done this before, surrounding yourself with the proper support during this period of transition is key. Here to offer you tools for a smoother adjustment is the co-author of Not Your Mother's Postpartum Book and co-creator of @mamapsychologists, Chelsea Bodie. This episode covers a lot, because honestly, postpartum is a lot — from challenging what society claims it's supposed to look like, to going back to work, and parenting an infant along with your other kids, we're diving into it all and tackling what it means to be a modern mama today. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

When it comes to childhood development, sleep is not a linear process. It's normal for young children to have ups and downs, regressions, and growth spurts with their sleep. Here to talk about how you can help your toddler say goodnight without the struggle is sleep specialist and RIE associate Eileen Henry. Beyond just tips and tricks, this episode will allow you to truly understand how to use your secure attachment bond to help your child feel more at ease with going to bed, and help you feel confident that you are fostering healthy nap time and bedtime skills too. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

When we become parents, time management strategies become more important than ever! Juggling activities and social calendars for ourselves, with our spouse, and for our children can feel like a full time job. Here to talk about her approach to systemizing the lives of busy parents in order to help us feel more in control of our days with less stress, overwhelm, and burnout is Chelsi Jo. From the clutter in our homes to our need to always be busy, and the seemingly never-ending tasks on our to-do lists, this episode will tackle all the emotional and tangible strategies you need to create a routine that works best for you and your unique family. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

The General Social Survey's findings on Americans' happiness levels are troubling. Only 19% of those polled in 2022 said they were very happy, the lowest percentage since this survey began collecting data in 1972. So what can we do to feel more joy? One huge factor may involve how and how much time we devote to play. Here to discuss ways we can infuse more fun into parenthood is the author of the new book The Fun Habit, Dr. Mike Rucker. From being intentional about what we choose to focus on, finding ways to play with and without our children, and breaking down the difference between passive and active leisure, this episode will have you walking feeling a renewed sense of optimism, and a game plan for moving past burnout. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Do you feel the pressure to get everything "right"? We know the scientifically proven effects stress has on parents. And what's more, how this parental stress can negatively impact our children. And yet, we still lack proper support systems for caregivers and families. Joining me today is Dr. Sterling, a board-certified OB/GYN who has made it her mission to provide comprehensive support to people undergoing the physical and emotional challenges of pregnancy and postpartum. We'll talk about the mental load of pregnancy and parenthood, strategies moms and dads can use to combat burnout and stress, share stories of our own experiences with symptoms of postpartum anxiety, and offer tips for how you can lean into your own personal strengths to help you more fully enjoy your parenting journey. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources

Toddlers are often misunderstood. They're no longer babies, yet they still have very little knowledge of the world and the way things work—something that is easy to forget when we are constantly being blown away by their maturity and developmental leaps at this age. I am so excited to be joined this week by the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series, Carol Zeavin and Rhona Silverbush to talk all things toddlerhood. We'll help you learn and understand exactly how you can best support your kiddo through some common toddler situations (like potty training, sharing, becoming a big sibling, and separation anxiety) all of which will help you to walk away from this episode with a deeper understanding of just what life looks like through the eyes of your toddler. I want to hear from you! Send me a topic you want me to cover or a question you want answered on the show! ✨ DM me on Instagram at @securelyattachedpodcast or @drsarahbren ✨ Send an email to [email protected] ✨ And check out drsarahbren.com for more parenting resources