ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show

Each generation will reap what the former generation has sown. —Chinese Proverb | Learn how to break free of those negative parenting behaviors that have held you back from having the extraordinary marriage you desire. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Honor the space between no longer and not yet." —Nancy Levin When you are married, transitions don’t only affect you, they also affect your spouse. Transitions can impact the different intimacies in your marriage. Marriage is full of transitions: First house First baby Moves Job changes Job losses Taking care of kids Taking care of your parents One income Two incomes Kids becoming adults And the list goes on You can seemingly be going along thinking... "Ah, life is good, we’ve got everything figured out", then BAM transition comes. Or, you’re planning for a natural transition, kids growing up, buying a house, moving and yet, no matter how much you plan for it, there are still situations in that transition that catch you off guard. Everyone handles transitions differently. Some people jump right in, put their blinders on and power through whatever that change is. Some people can become paralyzed with all of the decisions that have to be made, they can feel helpless in those seasons, not knowing which way is the right way to go and so they withdraw from doing anything. For some, transitions feel very uncertain, and there is a high level of fear. For others, the transitions may be unwelcome or unplanned and there is a high level of anger or sadness. All of these reactions will impact you and your spouse. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about how you can navigate life, work and other transitions you will face together as a team. EPISODE SPONSOR | HelloFresh HelloFresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy, and convenient! Each week HelloFresh creates new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions designed to take around 30 minutes. For novices to seasoned home-cooks who are short on time HelloFresh sources the freshest ingredients, measured to the exact quantities needed so there’s no food waste. Take $30 off your first week of deliveries when you enter promo code OEM30. Other Resources: 140 - Scheduling Sex Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Never stop showing someone how much they mean to you." Over time you have lost the anticipation and excitement of your relationship. Your marriage has become something you have to tolerate, something you have to survive or make it through. For some it's like the song from the Righteous Brother’s “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling”. You may have lost that loving feeling and you're wondering on what to do next. Do you remember when the two of you were courting one another? There was anticipation and excitement when you would spend time together. During your courtship both of you invested in the relationship by getting to know one another, spending time together and being intentional about your time together. You prepared and thought about the other’s needs. You planned for dates, conversations, and everything else. It wasn’t just “anything goes” rather it was a season of “let me put my best foot forward. After the honeymoon and many years together your lives fall into routines. You have a comfort level with one another and if you are really truthful with yourselves you've become lazy in your marriage. Time together has not been important, you don’t do the little things anymore, you've stopped having conversations that meant so much when you were courting one another. You're beginning to hear these phrases more and more: This is too much work. You’re too needy. Why won’t you spend time with me? It's time to get those loving feelings back by courting your spouse like you did when you first meet. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about how you can have those loving feelings of affection and connection with your spouse once again. EPISODE SPONSOR | StoryWorth StoryWorth is an amazing way to preserve memories and to learn about your spouse, mom, dad or any relative or friend with their responses. Each week StoryWorth will send your loved one an email with a question to be answered (you can either choose from the questions provided or come up with your own). At the end of the year, the stories will be printed into a hardcover book. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to capture life’s most treasured moments. Grab your subscription to StoryWorth today! Other Resources: 3 Marriage Tips From A Pageant Coach Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Never be afraid to try something new BECAUSE life gets boring when you stay within the limits of what you already know." The first sex challenge we completed happened 9 years ago in the fall of 2008. We had been married 11 years and these years were not the best years. Two kids ages 2 and 5 years old had taken up much of our times We lived as roommates with little to no intimacy. It was at this time that we decided to take on the 60 Days of Sex Challenge. A bit crazy... Yes. Worth it... Absolutely. We had no idea at the time what would happen in our life when one question was asked and the one answer was given. The same thing is true in your marriage. There are so many pivot points in a relationship. So many times when you could go left or right, working with each other or working against each other. We made one decision, 9 years ago, to make sex a priority in our marriage, to go from living like roommates to living like lovers, to being open about our sexual needs and to being transparent in the bedroom, and out of it Your marriage can experience the same. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about what can happen in your marriage when the two of you take on a sex challenge. EPISODE SPONSOR | CanvasPeople.com CanvasPeople.com has a very easy to use Photo-to-Canvas service that takes your favorite photo memories and turns them into beautiful artwork for you to enjoy every day. Instead of snapping that beautiful photo and letting it rot on your cell phone – you can bring that photo to life on your walls at home, in your office, or to give as a great gift. Limited Time Offer: Order an 11x14 canvas for FREE. All you pay for is shipping. Use Promo Code: marriage at checkout. Grab your FREE canvas today! Other Resources: Intimacy Ignited 7 Days of Sex Challenge 19 Questions to Amazing Sex Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"She's not nagging. She's trying to tell you something. The only reason she's being persistent is because she cares. When she stops nagging, you should be worried because at that point she no longer cares." Nagging usually doesn’t start out as a problem in marriage. As time goes on though you begin to share things with your spouse that are bothering you. You don't see any change in behavior so you repeat yourself, over and over again. Then you get demanding. Sometimes you get mean and angry. Other times you get loud because you want to make sure they hear you. And still no results. You continue to nag and to you it seems that your spouse just ignores your requests. Why? Because nagging isn’t solving your communication problems. In fact it could be making your communication worse. When nagging is present in your marriage, it’s time for both of you to evaluate what’s going on. If you are repeatedly nagging your spouse you need to ask yourself... Why aren’t your requests being heard or acted upon? Are you treating your spouse like a partner or like a child? Do they hear encouragement from you or is it only criticism? If you are continuously feeling nagged you need to ask yourself... What is my spouse trying to tell me and what action(s) do I need to take? What is my spouse pointing out that I don’t want to change or acknowledge? Nagging is a symptom that there is disconnect in your marriage and when nagging is present it’s time to take action. Nagging over time is incredibly destructive as it literally chips away at the foundation of your marriage, one comment at a time. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the impact of nagging on your marriage and the strategies you can use to stop this style of communication. EPISODE SPONSOR | CanvasPeople.com CanvasPeople.com has a very easy to use Photo-to-Canvas service that takes your favorite photo memories and turns them into beautiful artwork for you to enjoy every day. Instead of snapping that beautiful photo and letting it rot on your cell phone – you can bring that photo to life on your walls at home, in your office, or to give as a great gift. Limited Time Offer: Order an 11x14 canvas for FREE. All you pay for is shipping. Use Promo Code: marriage at checkout. Grab your FREE canvas today! Other Resources: 295: The No Rejection Zone 334: The Emasculated Man 335: She’s Not Your Mother Feelings List Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Success isn’t a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire." —Arnold Glasgow For the most part your day-to-day activities are ruled by your calendars, by schedules, and by alerts popping up on your phone. It doesn’t matter how you stay organized, the fact is that you have ways to keep your time organized and keep you moving to the next thing. And then... It comes to your sex life. You desire spontaneity and yet your life is ruled by schedules. Or you are waiting for the perfect moment, the perfect energy level, the perfect number of chores, obligations and to-dos to be done. Waiting for all of these things to line up will cause you to miss out on opportunities to connect with your spouse. Instead begin to look for those opportunities to be spontaneous within the structure of your marriage. You desire a quick encounter and be a spontaneous lover but then you are not on the same wavelength with your spouse. There is a yearning to have sex outside of your bedroom and yet you don’t always know how to make that happen so it doesn't. Many of us often fight against structure or planning because we feel like it’s going to take away from our freedom. In actuality the opposite is true. Why? Because if you know the framework, the starting line, then anything is possible. For example, many of you have heard us talk about The Intimacy Lifestyle. We have structure only in the way that the days of the week have been split up. That’s our starting line. The creativity comes in when we choose our own ways to initiate. So let the fun begin as you become a spontaneous lover. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about how you can have fun and excitement in your bedroom by being a spontaneous lover. EPISODE SPONSOR | Called to Love: Experiencing Your Best Marriage Through the Words of Jesus Marriage doesn't have to be so complicated. There is a manual on how to do this thing called "happily ever after." In Called to Love you will be equipped to look at your spouse the way that Jesus does, take time to pray for your marriage instead of throwing up your hands and saying, "Heaven help me" and transform your relationship into what God intended for your marriage when the two of you became one. Grab your copy of Called to Love and the audio book bonus today. Other Resources: 21 Ways to Initiate Sex With Your Spouse 001: 60 Days of Sex Jinshi Bamboo Boxer Briefs Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness rather it is a sign of strength. It takes courage to let others into your world." —Anonymous As a couple you may be stuck. You may be stuck in the same routines. Maybe you're stuck in the same fights. Or you've noticed that your marriage is stuck in the same cycles. It’s as if every day is groundhog day. You wake up and the same day is repeated over and over again. This repetition in your marriage leads to feelings of boredom, discontentment and a lack of interest. Recently you’ve been asking yourself, "Is this is as good as it gets?" Well... If you are not willing to make a change it might be time. With a few tweaks you'd be amazed what could happen in your marriage. Here's the thing, to get something different you have to do something different. What are you willing to do in your marriage to experience a shift like never before? Where can you begin to change the environment in your marriage? How will stepping into a new habit impact what you do with your spouse? To get to extraordinary you need to stop waiting for your spouse to grow or change first and take the lead. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the importance of taking action to create change in your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | Called to Love: Experiencing Your Best Marriage Through the Words of Jesus Marriage doesn't have to be so complicated. There is a manual on how to do this thing called "happily ever after." In Called to Love you will be equipped to look at your spouse the way that Jesus does, take time to pray for your marriage instead of throwing up your hands and saying, "Heaven help me" and transform your relationship into what God intended for your marriage when the two of you became one. Grab your copy of Called to Love and the audio book bonus today. Other Resources: The Intimacy Wheel 15 Ways to Romance Your Spouse Over the Next 30 Days Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Men who trust other men will make fewer mistakes than he who distrusts them." —Camillo de Cavour When you think about your friendships as a kid and as an adult a few things stand out and the research is supporting this. During childhood both boys and girls have friends and often make deep friendships. From roughhousing on the playground to building with Legos, from competing on the sports field to running to winning the debate, there is a connection that boys have that as children often looks similar to girls. And then somewhere in those middle teenage years research says that the friendships boys have start to change. They don’t necessarily have that emotional connection, it’s not a place to be vulnerable and yet men need this as much as women. Think about the friends that each of you have. Maybe your friends are couple friends. You both share and hang out together on the weekends. Or the friends that you hang with are the husbands of your wives friends or the dads of your kids friends. Men need their own friends. Wives you can’t be everything for your husband. It’s not healthy for either of you. Husbands you need to hang out with men. Without deep, vulnerable friendships men live in a facade. They keep up the image at work, at home, everywhere and become more and more isolated. Truth is that men have the same emotional needs that women do, granted it looks different. Wives, you need to be encouraging your husband to grow strong, positive friendships with men who will encourage him to be a strong man and husband. Guys you need mentors and peers who will elevate who you are, who will provide you with that sounding board and understanding. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about why you as a man and husband need friends that will encourage, lift you up and support you through all seasons of life. EPISODE SPONSOR | Called to Love: Experiencing Your Best Marriage Through the Words of Jesus Transform your relationship into what God intended for your marriage when the two of you became one. Mark your calendars for April 4th because you’re not going to want to miss the release of Alisa's upcoming book, Called to Love. ONE Family sign up now as you will be receiving an extra special opportunity during the launch of the book. The finishing touches are happening to help you experience your best marriage. Get signed up today! Other Resources: Emerge Conference Maximized Manhood Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"We don’t grow when things are easy, we grow when we face challenges." —Anonymous You want to last longer and yet most of the time you ejaculate quicker than you'd like. When you orgasm within 1-3 minutes of penetration this is general considered premature ejaculation. 20-30% of men (and their partners) are impacted by what is considered the most common type of male sexual dysfunction. Here’s the thing... you are not alone. 60% of US men feel that this is embarrassing which equate to roughly 77 million men who are feeling challenged in this area of sexual intimacy. 37% of women say that they are disappointed with their partner finishes before they do. Due to media messages of what’s normal 40% of men are feeling self conscious about their performance. That’s a lot of stress around one of the most intimate areas of your relationship. All of that stress is not making things any easier for either of you as the impact on marriage can be devastating. In many marriages the husband feels less than or inadequate. The wife is frustrated that there is so much focus on lasting longer and not so much focus on growing the relationship. He doesn’t know what to say. She doesn’t know what to say. Over time having sex become awkward and the two of you feel more disconnected. Without conversation around the topic it can truly become a wait and see place of nothingness in your marriage. Which often leads to nothing in the bedroom, also known as a sexless marriage. It doesn’t have to be like this. You don’t have to stop talking when things aren’t going well. You also don’t have to feel helpless, like there’s nothing that you can do. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about what both you and your spouse can do in the moment to help you last longer in bed. EPISODE SPONSOR | Called to Love: Experiencing Your Best Marriage Through the Words of Jesus Transform your relationship into what God intended for your marriage when the two of you became one. Mark your calendars for April 4th because you’re not going to want to miss the release of Alisa's upcoming book, Called to Love. ONE Family sign up now as you will be receiving an extra special opportunity during the launch of the book. The finishing touches are happening to help you experience your best marriage. Get signed up today! Other Resources: Essential Oil Diffuser Promescent Prolonging Delay Spray Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"When you can’t talk about your sex life there’s a connection that the two of you are missing out on." —Anonymous The world that you live in is hypersexualized and yet couples struggle with talking about their sex life with each other. How-to talk about sex is everywhere... it's on TV, on magazine covers, right here on the internet, with your friends but, when couples are asked if they are talking about sex the answer more often than not is "no". As a spouse in a committed relationship you may experience these thoughts: I don’t even know what I want. I’m not comfortable asking for what I want. What if my spouse says no. Our marriage already has enough rejection. My parents never talked about sex why should we. I don’t know how to start the conversation. These thoughts are swirling around your head as you think about having a deeper sexual experience. The thing is there is no way for your spouse to meet your needs sexually if you won’t tell them. Just because you don’t know how to do something doesn’t mean that silence or avoiding it is the best remedy. These emotions of fear, frustration and rejection can, over time create a huge amount of distance or disconnect in your marriage. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about what you can do to overcome the challenge of not talking about your sex life so that you can try something new. EPISODE SPONSOR | HelloFresh HelloFresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy, and convenient! Each week HelloFresh creates new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions designed to take around 30 minutes. For novices to seasoned home-cooks who are short on time HelloFresh sources the freshest ingredients, measured to the exact quantities needed so there’s no food waste. Take $35 off your first week of deliveries when you enter promo code OEM. Other Resources: 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The moment when he rolls over, puts his arm around me and pulls me closer, in his sleep. I like that." —Country Thang Many marriages are suffering from some lack of connection. Often it’s due to our busy schedules and the commitments that keep us running around like crazy. Maybe it’s the kids or your parents who have you running around. Work, volunteering and keeping the house inside and out add a lot to your plate. Then the end of the day comes and all you want to do is veg out. Not just from the world but also from each other. And when couples stops going to bed with each other they miss out on that chance for connection. You miss out on: Cuddling before falling asleep. Conversations that happen in the quiet of your bedroom away from the kids. Random spooning in the middle of the night. Spontaneous sex because the two of you are in the same place at the same time and the door is already locked. Early morning snuggles when your hair is a mess and you have your sleepy face. You and your spouse are desperate for connection and yet you choosing to miss out on this time that you simply cannot get back. Being together in the same bed is all about non-verbal communication. It’s about being together. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the impact that going to bed together has on your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Total Package With so many couples struggling with how or when to make sexual intimacy happen it’s time to take the guess work out of wondering when you are going to get some. This package includes the 7 Days of Sex Challenge ebook, audiobook and kindle versions along with 4 bonuses. Get your 7 Days of Sex Challenge Total Package TODAY! Other Resources: 6 Benefits of Cuddling With Your Spouse Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Sex solves most problems including headaches." —Anonymous You have a crazy headache, while on vacation, with plans to have sex, on the only night you have away from your kids. You take a nice nap to see if that would take care of it and it didn’t. You still have a headache. You're still in the hotel room you booked. And... you still have a spouse with the expectation that this is your opportunity for sex. What if having sex during this time will help your headache go away? Most of the times it's used as an excuse, an obstacle or a form of rejection. The next time you are about to say, "Not tonight, I have a headache", what if you said, "Yes, tonight! I want to get rid of this headache." What if an orgasm could relieve the pain of your headache? What if when you're not feeling well you could turn to your spouse for comfort instead of pushing them away? What if sex became the treatment to embrace instead of the action to avoid? In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about changing your mindset from “I can't have sex because I have a headache to let's have sexual because I have a headache.” EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all — the bedroom! Use this list to take this show and the ideas in it to the next level as you build your toolbox with resources to make awake sex even more extraordinary. Get 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom NOW! Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"In life it’s not where you go, it’s who you travel with.” —Charlie Schultz There are times when your vacations don’t always go as planned. You have your expectations for everything. From how relaxing it’s going to be to how often the two of you are going to have sex. You think about the adventures you are going to go on, the shows you will see, the relaxing you are going to do and the money you will spend during your trip. And then, you have instances like we have had on our last couple of vacations where we have discussed the sex part but no expectations about anything else. When you go on vacation with expectations that you don’t share with your spouses or you don't have a plan for high stress situations on vacation then the wheels can fall off of a good vacation. Been there, done that! You find yourself remembering the drama instead of the good times. That’s not why you go on vacation. You're not looking for more drama, you want to have an amazing time with your spouse and enjoy this time together. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about communicating to each other those vacation expectations you have so you experience the best travel possible. EPISODE SPONSOR | Connect Like You Did When You First Met — Free Softcover Book Hidden inside this book you’ll discover how to have fun, deep and meaningful conversations so you can connect with you spouse again. Get started on your emotional intimacy journey with your own softcover copy of Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couple PLUS 4 digital bonuses. Limited quantities available so get yours today. Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa 178: Sexpectations 334: The Emasculated Man 335: She’s Not Your Mother Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Let’s cuddle so that I can steal your body heat.” —Anonymous There are different reasons and times of the year when your bedroom is cold. It could be winter time, the air conditioning is on to beat the summer heat or your bedroom is in a cool part of your home. On the other hand one of you may run colder than the other. (We live this in our marriage.) When you are cold it makes heating things up in the bedroom a challenge. Let's face it... It’s tough to be naked when you are cold. It's difficult to be adventurous when you are freezing. There can be a serious disconnect in the bedroom when it comes to temperature. But how are going to heat up the bedroom so you can heat things up under the sheets? What can you do to create an environment where you want to be naked with one another, a place where you are comfortable being naked because you aren’t freezing? It's time to find different ways to heat up your bedroom. When you do you will begin to eliminate the excuses so that you can heat up your physically and sexually intimacy during those cold nights. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the importance of heating things up in the bedroom when it’s cold outside for more enjoyment under the covers. EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! Use this list to take this show and the ideas in it to the next level as you build your toolbox with resources to make awake sex even more extraordinary. Get 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom NOW! Other Resources: Top 10 Ways To Initiate Sex With Your Spouse TONIGHT 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP Quilted Polyester Heated Mattress Pad Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Intimacy is not purely physical. It’s the act of connecting with someone so deeply, you feel like you can see into their soul.” —Anonymous Spiritual intimacy has a huge impact on you and your marriage. And yet it’s the one intimacy that often gets overlooked or minimized even though it’s just as important if not more so than the others. In our marriage there have been seasons when we are clicking in our spiritual intimacy and times when we experience a dryness. The same may happen in your marriage. It can be with your emotional intimacy, your physical intimacy as well as in your spiritual intimacy. At those times when there is a disconnect it's time to get on your knees in prayer. You gain a different perspective on your situation. The challenge of trying to figure everything out on your own gets unstuck. New ideas for growing spiritually begin to happen. Prayers that are seemingly unanswered are answered. Those questions about your faith get unlocked. Often it's the starting that keeps you from the spiritual intimacy you desire. You see other who are amazing prayer warriors so how could you be like them. This stops you dead in your tracks and yet you can become a prayer warrior. You and your spouse can experience the closeness that comes through prayer, but you have to put your knees on the floor. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about what can happen to you when you are on your knees praying for your marriage and your spouse. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle Sometimes it can be hard to think of what to get your love... chocolates, lingerie, a night out. Each of these are great choices and yet what about something truly unique this year? What about something that extends Valentine’s Day beyond one day? Get the 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle NOW! Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now C3 San Diego Emerge Conference Night Light: A Devotional for Couples Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Money is an opportunity to reach unity in marriage. When couples work together they can do anything." —Dave Ramsey You have probably heard the quote, "You should never talk about money, politics or religion." Now, this might be true if you are at a dinner party and yet... You are taking this stance when it comes to money in your marriage. There is no connection, discussion, or even a conversation about your money. If you are honest with yourselves there is no plan for your money. Without a plan or even conversations about money matters you feel stressed, have anxiety and live in a place of fear. No matter if you are: Newlyweds. New parents. Buying a house. In a job transition. College planning. Looking at retirement. Having to deal with medical needs. Your money matters and needs the two of you to have a plan for it. Right now you may be in crisis and need an immediate plan. Let's get started now so you can experience financial freedom. Maybe you are ready to go to the next level, now is the time for you to be thinking about those advisors and planners that you need to have in your life Hopefully you are doing great and are thinking about what's next? It's time to discuss how can we be a blessing to others with what we have received. At each level being intentional is a game changer. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the power that financial intimacy has to bring strength and unity to your marriage. Your money matters impact each area of intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle Sometimes it can be hard to think of what to get your love... chocolates, lingerie, a night out. Each of these are great choices and yet what about something truly unique this year? What about something that extends Valentine’s Day beyond one day? Get the 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle NOW! Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Oils and Intimacy Facebook Group Financial Peace University Our Family Emergency List Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"So many people hear the words physical intimacy and think about sex. There are so many layers to being physically intimate with your spouse, choosing just one aspect shortchanges both of you." —Anonymous Touch is so important and yet touch in any form may be absent or inconsequential in your marriage at this time. This absence of touch or in the quality of the touch, leads to a feeling of being unwanted, unseen, undesired. It’s interesting that touch is often one of the first ways that you begin to express your interest in your spouse when you first met. Then you start your lives together and before you know it touch is one of the first things to go. The most obvious absence of physical intimacy is a lack of sex. But it’s more than that. Right now you may be struggling with little to no physical intimacy of any form (hugs, kisses, cuddling, holding hands, etc). Without touch, without physical intimacy your marriage can feel like a relationship of roommates. It can feel like you are just sharing the same house and the same responsibilities but really have nothing that would differentiate yourselves as a married couple. The two of you need touch. Your bodies were designed for it. You were designed to fit together. You have to create opportunities to connect and you have to be intentional about doing so. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about why physical touch is an important area of connection for you and your spouse. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle Sometimes it can be hard to think of what to get your love... chocolates, lingerie, a night out. Each of these are great choices and yet what about something truly unique this year? What about something that extends Valentine’s Day beyond one day? Get the 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle NOW! Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"You define what is important to you by who you spend your time with." —Anonymous When you were dating there was no shortage of things to do or ways that you wanted to spend your time together. No matter where you were or what time of day it was you got creative. You would pick up on the smallest comments and run with it, turning that comment into an incredible adventure you would do together. And then... You begin living together, jobs, bills, volunteering and kids take up time you once had together. Date nights were the same every time and you both lost the excitement and anticipation of a fun time together. It's time for you to stop asking "What do you want to do?" when you are heading out on a date. Your marriage needs connection. As you plan out your dates this year: It’s about spending time together building memories. Learning what the other likes as interests change over time. It’s about getting out of your comfort zone. It’s about trying new things. Put yourself in your spouse’s world. Laugh. Overcoming fear. It's time to build a vibrant marriage instead of tolerating a stale one. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about how to answer that timeless question of what do we do together. EPISODE SPONSOR | Connect Like You Did When You First Met — Free Softcover Book Hidden inside this book you’ll discover how to have fun, deep and meaningful conversations so you can connect with you spouse again. Get started on your emotional intimacy journey with your own softcover copy of Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couple PLUS 4 digital bonuses. Limited quantities available so get yours today. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"When you forgive, you in no way change the past but you sure do change the future." —Bernard Meltzer The year started off with us discussing the importance of emotional intimacy in your marriage. This is how the two of you communicate and is the foundation for growth in the other five intimacies. How the two of you connect during both the good and tough times will make the difference. After last week's show we dealt with a tough time ourselves. There was a breakdown in emotional intimacy after the show that lead to distance and disconnect. What you do after the conflict can mean more than what happens during the conversation. Are you letting pride and ego stand in the way of you giving a sincere apology to your spouse? Is it an apology that you need to give? Or... Is it forgiveness that you need to ask for from your spouse. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the power an apology has on both of you when it comes to your emotional intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | HelloFresh HelloFresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy, and convenient! Each week HelloFresh creates new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions designed to take around 30 minutes. For novices to seasoned home-cooks who are short on time HelloFresh sources the freshest ingredients, measured to the exact quantities needed so there’s no food waste. Take $35 off your first week of deliveries when you enter promo code OEM. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Connect Like You Did When You First Met -- Free Paperback Book Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Communication must be HOT...Honest, Open and Two Way." —Dan Oswald Do the two of you have time each week when you can connect with your thoughts and feelings? We spent many years of our marriage, probably the first ten years with little to no emotional intimacy. We could talk about anything while we were dating and then after the ring and the wedding... crickets. It was easier to avoid confrontation. It was easier to stuff things inside. Why share your feeling to deal with deflection, tears and the silent treatment. Your emotional intimacy has become repetitive as you talk about the kids, groceries and sport schedules. You now look across the table at your spouse and wonder, what do we have in common? Why can’t we talk to each other? Why do we have to get in a fight over everything? The answer is that there is flat spot on your emotional wheel. If you have a flat tire on your car, you have to stop and take action. If you keep driving on a flat wheel you will destroy the tire and eventually ruin the alignment. The same thing is true of your marriage. If your emotional intimacy is running flat you are throwing the alignment of your marriage out of whack. It’s time to take action. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about taking the emotional intimacy in your marriage through honest, open and two way listening to the next level. EPISODE SPONSOR | Connect Like You Did When You First Met -- Free Softcover Book Hidden inside this book you'll discover how to have fun, deep and meaningful conversations so you can connect with you spouse again. Get started on your emotional intimacy journey with your own softcover copy of Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couple PLUS 4 digital bonuses. Limited quantities available so get yours today. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Think as BIG as you possibly can and base what you do, how you do it and who you do it with on succeeding at that level." —Gary Keller & Jay Papasan If the two of you don’t have a vision for 2017, it’s going to look a lot like 2016. As you look ahead you need to know what areas of your marriage you want to focus on? These areas include: Financial intimacy Physical intimacy Spiritual intimacy Recreational intimacy Emotional intimacy What would it take to take each of these intimacies to the next level? Extraordinary doesn’t happen overnight and yet with many baby steps put together you can get there. In the fall of 2008 we had a vision to do the 60 Days of Sex Challenge. The vision for our marriage was that something had to change. We needed a new direction and the first baby step was taken. Look at what has happened in your life because of this vision. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about taking your marriage to the next level in this new year. EPISODE SPONSOR | ONE Extraordinary Marriage’s Strategic Marriage Coaching It’s that time of year when you are thinking about getting physically fit. You're checking out gym memberships, making plans to eat healthy and drafting their new year’s resolutions to make this your fittest year ever. Make this the year that you work on getting relationally fit! Having a coach who will hold you accountable and help you work through your challenges will make all of the difference between repeating the cycles of the past and creating an extraordinary marriage. Learn more about coaching today. Other Resources: The ONE Thing Minter & Richter Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Traditions remind us to stop the busy cycle of life long enough to reconnect and build bonds." —Sabrina Beasley McDonald It’s important for the two of you to have your own night before Christmas or Christmas Day traditions. Something that you do together, a gift or an adventure that is about you as a couple. This is about the two of you as your own separate entity, separate from the kids and from your extended families. It’s that reminder that you and your spouse are a team. When you begin to think about starting a new tradition make sure it's something that you can do year after year. Traditions don't usually “just happen". The first year may and yet after that you have to be intentional about it. You're setting this up because traditions give a sense of continuity. Doing the same thing (or something similar) allows the two of you to anticipate that experience, to remember how you have done this in the past and how you might do it in the future. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the excitement you both can have the night before Christmas or on Christmas with some fun traditions. EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom With this FREE resource you can get creative with the gifts that you are going to put under the Christmas tree this year. No more wondering about what to get. Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! Grab your 11 Must Have Items Now. Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Right NOW is the most important moment in your life." —Gail Lynne Goodwin Another day comes to an end and you and your spouse are tired. Earlier in the day you both were romancing each other and had every intention to enjoy one another. But it's another night of you falling asleep even before you start foreplay and leaving you both frustrated with your sexual intimacy. There is much on your plates and yet it's time to prioritize your marriage so that you both enjoy your sexual intimacy. It means making choices about when you are going to be sexually intimate. There is no rule, no law, that states that sex is ONLY at the end of the day. It's time to change things up in your marriage and enjoy awake sex! Sex when you both are fully engaged and ready to experience the orgasms you desire for one another. Sex that is a bit loud, in a different position and a room brightened by the sun. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about how powerful it is to have sex when you are fully awake, not just going through the motions at the end of the day. EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom With this FREE resource you can get creative with the gifts that you are going to put under the Christmas tree this year. No more wondering about what to get. Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! Grab your 11 Must Have Items Now. Other Resources: 140 - Scheduling Sex 21 Ways to Initiate Sex with Your Spouse Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Sometimes all you do is smile. Move on with your day, hold back the tears and pretend everything is OK." —Anonymous The holiday season is a busy time of year. You are are pulled in many directions and feel overwhelmed with the responsibilities of job, family, kids, volunteering, Christmas parties, and everything else that is on your plate. It's a time when you may feel like there is too much going on and you’re holding on by a thread. And then your spouse asks you something like… What’s wrong with you? How are you doing? What's going on? Since everything is at the tipping point, you lock the true answer inside and simply say, “I’m Fine”. More often than not when you say, "I’m FINE", it’s usually a code word for I’m feeling broken in some area of my life. When you say "I’m Fine" you put a wall, an obstacle in your marriage. Then one of you checks out. Either you or your spouse. I’m FINE leads to disconnect because you aren’t sharing what’s going on with you I’m FINE leads to resentment because you won’t let this person, YOUR SPOUSE, into your world. It's time to eradicate I'm Fine from your vocabulary. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the impact two words, I’m Fine, have on your marriage and your intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path The ability to talk to each other is vital to all areas of your marriage. Here's the thing...if there is unease when talking, tension or bickering you know the stress that it places on you. You're drained. It’s time to take control of the communication in your marriage. There is so much that is happening in your life each and every day that if you do not take the time to learn how to best connect with your spouse you are going to struggle for years to come. Grab He Zigs, She Zags Now! Other Resources: Oils & Intimacy Facebook Group 287 - The Impact of Tone and Timing 332 - Releasing Resentment Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"What do brushing your teeth, taking a shower and making time to shave all have in common? They all improve your chances in the bedroom." —Alisa DiLorenzo Interestingly enough we have never tackled the topic of personal hygiene, even though it’s something that we frequently discuss in our marriage. Things like morning breath, unshaven legs, and manscaping is what we're talking about. When you are aware of what works for you and for your spouse it makes a difference in your sexual intimacy. We have experienced this in our own marriage and have recently made a change to our personal hygiene that has benefited our marriage. There are a number of personal hygiene options you have. Some of them are: Shaving Waxing Sugaring Facials Haircut Shower Bath Oils Taking time to care for yourself has a number of physical and mental benefits. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the mental and physical benefits of personal hygiene for you and your spouse, especially in the bedroom. EPISODE SPONSOR | Engaged Marriage Intimacy Reignited Reigniting the spark in the bedroom doesn’t have to be difficult. In fact, there are simple techniques that work incredibly fast. And will continue to work (no matter how long you’ve been married). Plus they're proven to work... even if you're extremely busy. Having an amazing sex life with your spouse. One that your friends would be totally jealous of.And wonder how you keep the spark alive.All because you know the “secrets” to a loving and intimate marriage. Grab Intimacy Reignited Now! Other Resources: 7 *Merry* Days of Sex Challenge 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life Mangroomer Ultimate Pro Body Groomer Fresh Balls Lotion Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Showing gratitude is one of the most simplest yet most powerful things that human beings can do for each other." —Randy Pausch Thanksgiving. It's a time dedicated to giving thanks and expressing gratitude to those you love. The act of expressing gratitude is important for your spouse who receives your gratitude as well as for you who is giving it. When you do this for and with each other it changes your perspective on your marriage. When you express your appreciation for what you have your world shifts. Your mind shifts. Life changes when you are thankful for things you have and can actually express that out loud. What you share doesn’t have to be anything earth shattering. It doesn’t have to be huge. But it has to be said. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why it’s important to express gratitude in your marriage and how you can incorporate this idea into the holidays. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"If her bra matches her panties when you take off her clothes, it wasn’t you who decided to have sex." —Anonymous When you are wearing sexy underwear it has a way of bringing you and your spouse together in a special way. A loose definition of sexy underwear is: underwear that has fun colors or patterns that hug you in all of the right places because they fit. Many folks dismiss the importance of underwear, seeing them as merely a functional piece of clothing and yet they have the potential to be so much more. Sexy underwear makes you feel sexy. It’s visually stimulating for both of you. You think about your partner throughout the day, knowing that they are going to be pleased with what they see. :) Your sexy underwear is another tool in your marriage tool box. Whatever constitutes sexy underwear for you the key is getting them and then wearing them often. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about your sexy underwear and why it’s not just a functional piece of clothing. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Sexy Lingerie Panties JINSHI Bamboo Underwear 051 - True Friendship 166 - Holey Underwear 7 Days of Sex Challenge Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Once you lie to me the first time, I’ll question everything else you say." —Anonymous When you lie to your spouse it's a cancer that multiplies over time. The lie starts off small and then grows with one lie after another. Eventually you have something so large and unrecognizable that the pain you are experiencing has to go. We are experiencing an epidemic in marriages, an epidemic of lying and it’s wreaking havoc on relationships. Lies can come in different forms such as... Not telling the truth. Leaving out bits and pieces. Not honoring your word. Little white lies. Big whopping lies. Research has shown that individuals will lie for different reasons. The most common are: Trying to protect yourself. Feeling shame over a decision. Wanting to avoid confrontation. The very things that you are trying to avoid are the things that you invite into the relationship by your lying. When you speak these lies you find yourself under attack as you constantly look over your shoulder wondering how or when your partner is going to find out about your secret. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about how lies become a cancer in your marriage and what you need to do to heal. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Snoring is a good indication that one person is asleep and no one else is." —Linda Poindexter It's been another long day as you prepare yourself for a good night sleep. You slide into bed, turn on your Sound+Sleep Machine as you enjoy a quiet house. Your eyelids begin to close and you are just about to fall asleep when… The snoring starts. Oh no! Another night of sleep is going to be a challenge. AGAIN. Marriages are struggling when one or both spouse's are snoring. According to the National Sleep Foundation, snoring affects some 90 million adults, 37 million on a “regular basis”. If this is you in your marriage... you are not alone. But this doesn’t make it any easier for you. Snoring can cause many problems in marriage. Such as: Frustration, more arguments, more disconnection. Sleeping in separate rooms. Arguments about whether or not it’s happening. Making your relationship a he said/she said. Your health. Now, the two of you don’t have to keep on suffering... In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about what happens in your marriage when one of you is snoring so loud that it interrupts a good night of sleep. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Sound+Sleep Machine Stripped Down: 13 Keys to Unlocking Intimacy in Your Marriage Sleeping Wedges Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Circumstances may cause interruptions and delays but never lose sight of your goal." —Mario Andretti Has there ever been a time in your marriage when you and your spouse were about to enjoy sex and then you hear a knocking at your door? Maybe you can relate to this scenario… All of the kids are in bed (or so you think) The house is quiet You’re locked in your room Your Sound+Sleep Machine is on as you begin to make romantic eyes at one another You start foreplay And there’s a knocking on the door. Who is it? It’s one of your kids, who you thought was asleep, needing some cuddle time. You head out of bed, help them get settled and then head back to your bedroom. Your spouse is waiting as you climb back into bed. You begin to get in the mood when again you hear... Knocking at your door. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about what happens when someone’s knocking on your bedroom door in the middle of your time together. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Sound+Sleep Machine 332 - Releasing Resentment Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that is has taken place." —George Bernard Shaw When you have certain expectations, your spouse has expectations and yet neither of you communicate them to each other there will be unmet expectations. Each of you will have a level of frustration that you are experiencing. You may even be say things like: I don’t understand why he/she doesn’t know this by now. Isn’t the way we do __________ obvious? Why do I have to spell it out every time? These questions indicate that there are unmet expectations in the marriage. There are areas of your life and marriage that you want your spouse to know or do. And often there is this game played… I’ll wait to see what he/she does. Will my spouse get it right this time. I've said it before. With this attitude you are setting yourself up for frustration. Because... you are constantly growing and changing. your moods are not the same from one day to the next. life experiences have impacted the way that you see things in the relationship. Often your expectations are not being shared in a way that is beneficial to your relationship. You hint at them, voice them after the fact and even said when you are highly emotional. It doesn’t have to be that way. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why your unmet expectations aren’t so obvious to your spouse. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proved Questions for Couples 287 - The Impact of Tone and Timing Men’s Bamboo Boxer Briefs Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Desire creates havoc between two people when it is the ONLY thing between them or when it’s what’s missing." —Mignon McLaughlin Have you ever experienced: Lack of sexual desire Low libido No libido A take it or leave it attitude No expression of desire No sexual connection. A sexual connection with your spouse is a primary need. Unfortunately, a lack of sexual desire is impacting your marriage and the reasons for it are varied. It could be from: Stress or anxiety Health issues Resentment Rejection Kids in the bedroom Being over committed Unresolved forgiveness. Whatever the reason may be lack of sexual desire has always been addressed as "his problem" or "her problem" and yet how often do you stop to think that it’s really OUR problem. When there is a lack of sexual desire in your marriage this creates a divide, it builds a wall, it separates the two of you. When this happens you can begin to have feelings of: Anger Loneliness Doubt Fear Negativity Resentment. Instead of the two of you becoming more unified as a married couple a lack of sexual desire can have the two of you feeling more divided than ever. It can have you questioning your marriage and your role in it. It doesn’t have to be this way. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the impact that a lack of sexual desire has on you, your spouse and your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: 328 - The Intimacy Lifestyle 332 - Releasing Resentment Extra Strength Horny Goat Weed for Natural Libido Boost 7 Days of Sex Challenge: How to Rock Your Sex Life and Your Marriage Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couples 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year." —Anonymous When this show is first released on October 4, 2016, we will be 24 hours away from celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. As with any milestone, we approached this anniversary with celebration. It also became a time to reflect on where we have been and where we are going. While 20 years married is a significant anniversary, it’s not the end of the road. We still have a lot of life left in this marriage and we want to keep doing what’s been working. So what have we learned in 20 years? What did we wish we knew at the beginning? For us it’s come down to 3 things that have played out time and again in our marriage and we’ve seen it in so many of the emails and voicemail messages from the ONE Family. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about 3 ways you can make sure that there is a celebration for your next anniversary and those to come. EPISODE SPONSOR | Christian Credit Counselors Christian Credit Counselors is a non-profit Credit Counseling and Debt Management organization. For the last 25+ years they have helped over 300 thousand clients, get out of debt. They lower high interest rates and consolidate payments into one affordable monthly payment. Average clients pay off their debt up to 80% faster on the Debt Management Program. Call them today at 1(800)557-1985 for a free no-obligation debt analysis or visit them at ChristianCreditCounselors.org today! Other Resources: Breaking Free: How to Improve Yourself to Improve Your Relationship 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP 193 - Divorce Is Off The Table Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Knowing is not enough we must apply. Willing is not enough we must do." —J W Von Goethe When you don’t know what works in the bedroom (or what doesn’t) you may be paralyzed wondering... Does my spouse like this? Is this position OK? Are they initiating? Is this a good time? Think about this for a minute. If you don’t know what your spouse likes, it’s hard to be fully present in the act of making love. If you don’t know how your spouse initiates or if they are initiating, there may be a lot of hurt feelings. Doubt creeps in and Doubt is NEVER a good thing in your marriage. When both of you don't know what works for the two of you this can create a disconnect. Disconnect leads to questions swirling in your head which then leads to a breakdown in your confidence. When you lose your confidence you wonder if you two even know each other anymore. At this point you may stop trying because of the uncertainty you are faced with each day. What does this mean? Less sex More frustration More arguments Unhappiness There are enough things in the world that can cause frustration in your life, let’s not have it be wondering what works for you and your spouse in the bedroom. This is something that the two of you can control and talk about. Now you may not always agree. But you will know your spouse. Because when you know what works you’re not just shooting blindly in your bedroom. You are making a conscious decision as to how you are going to approach your sexual intimacy. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why what you don’t know about your spouse in the bedroom can hurt you and your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | Breaking Free: How to Improve Yourself to Improve Your Relationship Many of you have said to us: "I know that there are areas that I need to work on." "My spouse is not ready to work on the marriage but I need to take action." "I want things to be different but I don’t know what to do." During this 4-week online group coaching workshop we will be covering sessions on how to overcome fear, creatively voice your expectations, lose the negative thoughts and how to be bold in your relationship. ONLY 20 men and 20 women will be accepted for this workshop which begins October 4. Don’t miss out on your chance to have your relationship transformed before the craziness of the holidays. Get all the details for Breaking Free NOW! 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP Strategic Coaching with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"In all things there is a law of cycles." —Tacitus (Roman Historian) It is absolutely critical that you understand the female menstrual cycle for your sex life and for your marriage. A woman’s body is absolutely amazing and it’s hard wired to ebb and flow as the hormones fluctuate each and every month. As a woman’s hormones change during the menstrual cycle so does her husband’s responsiveness to her. Pretty cool. Here's the thing though... You need to know what's going on. When hormonal forms of birth control are being used this may impact the menstrual cycles thus impacting your sex life. Men you need to understand your wife’s monthly rhythms as it will absolutely change your sex life. Choosing not to know about her menstrual cycle is choosing to not to be fully engaged in your marriage. Not knowing about the cycles of sex puts the two of you at a distinct disadvantage. Why you might ask... Because KNOWING will change how the two of you relate to one another. KNOWING allows the two of you to connect throughout the month in different ways based on biology as well as emotional connection. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why knowing her menstrual cycle is important to your sex life. EPISODE SPONSOR | Breaking Free: How to Improve Yourself to Improve Your Relationship Many of you have said to us: "I know that there are areas that I need to work on." "My spouse is not ready to work on the marriage but I need to take action." "I want things to be different but I don’t know what to do." During this 4-week online group coaching workshop we will be covering sessions on how to overcome fear, creatively voice your expectations, lose the negative thoughts and how to be bold in your relationship. ONLY 20 men and 20 women will be accepted for this workshop which begins October 4. Don’t miss out on your chance to have your relationship transformed before the craziness of the holidays. Get all the details for Breaking Free NOW! Taking Charge of Your Fertility 7 Days of Sex Challenge Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Marriage doesn’t have the power to bind-only the actions of two people can do that. Forever and happy endings aren’t a given." —Leah Mercer You can make changes to your marriage no matter how long you've been married. For us it was at the 11 year make that we got radical when we started and completed the 60 Days of Sex Challenge. What you'll began to realize is that it’s never too late to stop the ineffective patters and behaviors. Here's the thing though... ...you'll need to made a decision to get back to the basics in different areas of your marriage. Because if you don't: Life will get in the way and you fall into your old, comfortable and ineffective patterns. You don’t know how to do what you think you need to do so you don’t do it. Fear of the unknown will keep you from doing anything. Living in this place you experience an increased level of frustration for you and your spouse. You know things need to change. You know that you need to do something different. So let's do it! In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why it’s important to stop those old, comfortable and ineffective patterns and instead take action in order to create transformation in your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path He Zigs She Zags gives you the tools that you need to have the communication you desire. This is not just about looking into each other’s eyes and sharing your deepest feelings, this is about giving the two of you a map to better communication. Get He Zigs, She Zags today! Schedule a Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa 7 Days of Sex Challenge Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"When you start using senses you’ve neglected, your reward is to see the world [and your marriage] with completely fresh eyes." —Barbara Sher Your marriages may be experiencing some struggles due to the fact that you are loving each other with only one or two of the 5 senses you have. You may have fallen into what’s comfortable for you in your marriage and not necessarily what’s best for your marriages. Using each of your 5 senses can bring a heightened experience to your marriage that may have become dormant. The 5 Senses: Sight Hearing Touch Taste Smell Just as your marriage needs all 6 forms of intimacies firing, you marriage needs ALL of your 5 senses involved in the marriage. When you are only loving with one or two of the senses you BOTH are missing out on an incredible level of connection. It’s incomplete. It’s a fraction of what it could be. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about loving one another using each of your 5 senses to stimulate excitement in your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | Top 11 Must Haves Items for Your Bedroom Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve discovered in the last 19 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! From fun toys, to those fabulous little items that set the mood, this is a list that you are going to want to have. Get your copy today! 338 - Beautiful Wife 287 - The Impact of Tone and Timing 56 Simple (But Super Effective) Compliments To Encourage Your Spouse Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Never judge someone on their past because they are no longer in that stage of life." —Alisa DiLorenzo Sex before marriage can be a roadblock to deep sexual intimacy. If you had sex before marriage you may have feelings of guilt, shame, and resentment. On the other side your spouse may have had sex before marriage with other partners and now you question the level of their commitment, you compare yourself to theses previous partners or you grew up knowing you should not have had sex together, but you did. We get it. We’ve been there. We both had sex before marriage with other partners and each other. Because we had sex before marriage it impacted our relationship for many years. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about breaking free from the guilt and shame you may carry because you had sex before marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path He Zigs She Zags gives you the tools that you need to have the communication you desire. This is not just about looking into each other’s eyes and sharing your deepest feelings, this is about giving the two of you a map to better communication. Get He Zigs, She Zags today! Schedule a Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa 4 Cool Statistics About Abstinence in the USA 319 – ESP (Extrasensory Perception) The Bondage Breaker Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You've been sharing with your wife that she is beautiful to you inside and out. You see her as this amazing, incredible gift from God. A gift that honestly you cannot wait to unwrap. You want her to realize that it's not a sin to acknowledge her own beauty and sensuality without feeling dirty and yet your wife doesn't see herself as beautiful. Your wife doesn't feel the same way about herself as you see her. There is a struggle you both face with reconciling the expectations in the bedroom with the discouraging words that she has received through her life. Additionally when she looks in the mirror and at her life: she feels stuck unattractive no where near beautiful. Yet you see her as an amazing woman, wife and mother, but you know there is a disconnect that is hurting your marriage. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why your marriage needs the phrase my beautiful wife. You'll be challenged to use this with your spouse and yet it’s important. EPISODE SPONSOR | One Question To Instantly Kickstart Your Communication Did you know that one question can change the entire dynamic of your marriage? One question when asked in an environment of love, one question where the answer is listened to and acted upon can transform the way that the two of you relate to one another. Want to know what the question is? Of course you do... Grab your One Question now! Schedule a Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I want a boring sex life, said no one ever." —Alisa DiLorenzo What would happen to your marriage if you broke the sexual routine you've been in and brought back some fun into your bedroom? Many couples are experiencing a sex life that has become one more thing on the to-do list. Same sexual routine time and time again that leads both you and your spouse to wondering why you even have sex. Your sexual intimacy is the same way, at the same time and in the same position time after time. It’s great that you're having sex and yet you know there is more. The challenges your face is that there is nothing to look forward, no anticipation, no romance. Sex is routine and sometimes... Boring. You move this way. Your spouse moves that way. You both know exactly how long it takes and you move on to the next thing on your list of to-d0's. No excitement. You're in a sexual routine. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why your marriage needs some fun and games to break the sexual routine you've been in. EPISODE SPONSOR | Win Your Very Own Sex Stack... One lucky winner will win their very own Sex Stack. This item is on our must have list for the bedroom and we’ve been talking about it for years. This is a great way to break out of your sexual routine. To try new things and explore one another. Enter now to win the Sex Stack. Fun Board Games to Spice up Your Sex Life Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s not your husband or your wife that’s the problem. The problem is the problem. Do you remember the part in your vows where it was spoken that the “two become one”? That piece is talking about the two of you. The two of, now marriage, have became one. Newsflash: You are on the same team in your marriage and you need to start looking at life like you are on the same team not as rivals. You need to clearly identify your challenges / problems and know that these are not your spouse. Because when you are doing battle with each other, every interaction becomes another opportunity to win. Another chance to prove your point, to be right, to make your spouse see your point of view and take it. If your spouse is the problem then every challenge, argument, or interaction will have a winner and a loser. Someone who is right and someone who is wrong. Where is the love in that? There is no love and that’s why these conversations or arguments start to wear you out. You lose sight of what you're trying to accomplish in order to be right, to win. How many times have you been arguing (and it’s been going on for awhile) only to realize that you have no idea what the original problem was? Why is that? You are fighting each other instead of finding a solution to the problem. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why you need to recognize that the problem isn’t your spouse, the problem is the problem. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path He Zigs She Zags gives you the tools that you need to have the communication you desire. This is not just about looking into each other’s eyes and sharing your deepest feelings, this is about giving the two of you a map to better communication. Get He Zigs, She Zags today! 6 Forms of Intimacy to Build a Strong Marriage 128 - Playing on the Same TEAM Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 // Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Your wife does not want to be your mother! She is and desires to be your wife and your lover. Unfortunately, more often than not she is treat as your mother. She's the person in the house who picks up after you, makes sure your laundry is done for when you need it, and treated the same way you treated your mother when you were growing up. Here's the thing... She does not want to be your mothers. She doesn't want to consider you as another child in the house and yet when your behavior mirrors that of a child she is going to react and treat you as one. This is NOT good! Over the years we have had husbands share with us that they want their wife to be romantic, to be sexual, and to be interested in them. But they are not because there's a disconnect. You've been treating her as your mother and not as your lover and wife. If you want a wife and lover in your home it's time to show her. Do this by the words you use and the actions to show her that she is your wife and lover. You have to go beyond a quick grab of her breasts now and then? Yes, we did say a quick grab because that’s how kids treat their mothers. Kids for the most part have no respect or awareness of their mother's body only their own needs. The longer your marriage stays in this vicious circle of emasculated man and wife as your mother, the harder it is for the two of you to relate as husband and wife and more importantly as lovers. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about why it’s important for husbands to treat their wife as their lover and not their mother. EPISODE SPONSOR | 4 Simple Strategies to Rebuild Trust Trust can seem like such a tough mountain to climb when you are in the process of rebuilding. It can feel like you just don’t know what to do first, who to talk to or where to turn. Don’t stay in that place of feeling overwhelmed. Don’t get paralyzed and do nothing. Get started on rebuilding the trust in your marriage. Grab your free report. Strategic Coaching with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is there an emasculated man living in your home? For the purpose of this show emasculated means: Make a person weaker or less effective Deprive a man of his role or identity Wives, you have the opportunity to not have an emasculated man in your marriage by the thoughts and action you have toward your husband. Husband's are being emasculated every day in their marriage, even ours has experienced this, and it happens in little ways. It’s not giving his suggestions equal billing in your marriage. It's not understanding and / or seeking to understand his role and the pressures he faces. It's putting him farther down on the priority list and as a result putting his needs behind everyone else’s. It’s assuming that because he used to be one way that he can never change, improve and grow. The thing is that you don't want another "child" to care for. You want a husband who is there for you emotionally, spiritually, physically and financially. You don't need an emasculated man anymore. You need a strong husband who... understands his value. feels your love, who knows that their home is a safe place, who knows that they will be encouraged and built up in that environment. feels that they are important for more than just bringing home a paycheck knows that they are a priority and will always be a priority in your life. understands that change is possible and that who they used to be or what they have done in the past does not define who they are forever. As the famous write Ralph Waldo Emerson stated, "A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has." You have the power right now to purposefully impact your husband. Take a step of faith and go do it! In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the problem of the emasculated man in marriage and how you as his wife can either build him up or tear him down. EPISODE SPONSOR | I Love You But I Don't Trust You Webinar Join us for the “I Love You But I Don't Trust You: 4 Simple Strategies To Build, Maintain, and Regain Trust In Your Relationship” webinar on Thursday July 28th at 6 PM PST. DURING THIS FREE WEBINAR YOU WILL LEARN: A practical step-by-step process for rebuilding trust after porn, infidelity, suspicion and harmful mistakes (even if your partner is not on board). Register NOW! 332 - Releasing Resentment Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Intimacy Lifestyle was introduced to the ONE Family as a way for you and your spouse to not have to wonder if you were going to have sex or not. Unfortunately, over the years we have heard from couples who have started to only get derailed for one reason or another. Some of these reasons are... "We agreed to The Intimacy Lifestyle but it seems like I am always having to remind my spouse". "My spouse said that they were on board but it doesn’t really seem like they are into it". "We agreed to The Intimacy Lifestyle but it doesn’t seem to be working for us". A few weeks ago we did a podcast on The Intimacy Lifestyle and realized that there was a major piece missing from that show. A piece that might just change everything. We talked about what The Intimacy Lifestyle IS but we didn’t talk about what it is NOT. The Intimacy Lifestyle is NOT Something to half heartedly commit to. Something to just spring on your spouse. A band-aid for your marriage. Something to just pacify your spouse. Something you decide to do and then never talk about again. Something that is ONE size fits all. Something that is convenient, it’s truly a lifestyle choice. A sex tool, honestly it is a communication tool and a tool to enhance all areas of your marriage. A lifestyle choice is just that, it’s choosing a style of life. In this case The Intimacy Lifestyle is choosing a style of life that involves intimacy at all levels. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about why it’s important to know what the intimacy lifestyle is NOT so that you can fully embrace all that it has to offer. EPISODE SPONSOR | Strategic Relationship Coaching with Alisa Imagine waking up each morning next to the person you love more than anything in the world. Not just a “roommate” or a person you “get on with”. But having the fairy tale marriage you've always dreamed of. Because it really is possible if you’re willing to put in the time. Start coaching today with Alisa. 328 - The Intimacy Lifestyle Dominion Card Game Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Resentment is a poison that builds slowly as it snowballs into extreme disconnect. What starts out as one disappointment becomes a laundry list of all of the ways that your spouse has hurt you, disappointed you, not been there for you, etc. The resentment that you harbor toward your partner can be masked as: Anger Boredom Indifference Withdrawal Disconnect What started out as something manageable now has become overwhelming for you and your partner. Right now, it’s feels virtually impossible to bridge that gap to reconnect. Both men and women experience resentment in different areas in the marriage. Some of these areas of resentment are... Staying home/working outside of the house Having to take care of the household Having to be the provider Always being the one to initiate Upside down priorities (kids, work, extended family, other friends) You now know why you are holding onto this resentment and yet do you know where it comes from? Resentment comes from... Ineffective communication Unvoiced expectations No clear vision direction Fear of rejection In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the negative consequences when resentment builds up in your marriage and what you can do to change that path. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get You Communication on the Same Path Remember how you felt when you first met your partner? How close you were? Like you were soul mates? Why because you spent so much time connecting and communicating. Now imagine having that same level of connection and intimacy for the life of your marriage. Become one of those couples that celebrates your 20th, 30th or even 50th wedding anniversary while you both are still completely in love with each other. Grab He Zigs, She Zags today. 046 - Are You Keeping Score? Dear Couples, Rejection Is Crushing Your Spouse Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Married couples perform both sex and making love. Would you agree? Sometimes it is intentional and sometimes it's because of circumstances. Sex happens when you only have 10 minutes before dinner for a quickie. You only have 10 minutes so it’s not going to be a marathon love making session. But if you are on vacation by yourselves with no kids now there’s no need to just have sex. You plan on making love while away. Making love is probably the easier one of these to understand, the slow and go with the emotional connection. On the other hand issues can arise when you and your spouse are only having sex. Let's be clear before you start to think that this is only about husband's using their wive's... This goes both ways! You may have even experienced this in your own marriage. So, as we dive into what it means to have sex and making love there is a very unique question to be answered... What would selfish sex look or be like for a married couple? In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the difference between having sex and making love and why knowing the difference matters in your marriage. EPISODE SPONSOR | 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life ASAP 19 Quick Questions will allow you and your spouse to get the conversation started about all things related to your sex life. Using these 19 questions gives you an opportunity to have those conversations, to think about your sex life. Take just one or 2 questions a day and talk about them outside of your bedroom, then enjoy discovering each other. Cleaning Up After Sex 3 Reasons Why Sex Isn’t a Dirty Word Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Last week we returned from our 20th anniversary trip to Peru. Our travels took us from San Diego to Lima, Peru, Cusco and then on to Machu Picchu. The international trip involved two red eye flights through Dallas on the way there and then Miami on our way home. Once in country... 2 flights from Lima to Cusco and back. 5 van rides from various points of our travel 4 tour buses including one that was hugging the switchbacks up and back from Machu Picchu 2 trains rides And lots of walking We probably logged somewhere around 9,000 miles in just over 8 days. Lots of delays (weather, traffic, celebrations). A few detours due to that same weather, traffic and celebrations and a whole lot of time to think about marriage. We spent almost every moment together for just over a week and still came away smiling (there were some discouraging times during our trip and sad faces when we were leaving Peru.) There was excitement, exhaustion, and frustration. When you are spending so much time together and placed in so many different environments together you... CANNOT hide behind your busyness CANNOT ignore your challenges or your attitudes Everything comes to the surface, everything that looks easy really takes a lot of effort, everything that looks like it goes in a straight line isn’t always straight. Marriage is a lot like traveling... There are a lot of different ways to get to where you want to go. What you think will be the fast way can hold you up. What you think is the most direct way will have you going in circles and doubling back. In other words there will be detours on this adventure we call marriage. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the importance of detours and delays that can lead to success in your marriage journey. EPISODE SPONSOR | Summer of Love Ultimate Bundle Flash Sale (June 28 - 30, 2016) It’s summer and what better time to... Enjoy Great Sex, Enhance Your Communication, Rebuild Trust & Connect Again! The Summer of Love Ultimate Bundle includes our most popular programs so that you can have the extraordinary marriage you desire. Grab the Summer of Love Ultimate Bundle and get up to 75% off! Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's the risk reward in your marriage? There's a risk in any relationship between two people. You risk being vulnerable. You risk being rejected. You risk being misunderstood. You risk hurt feelings. You risk anger. You risk silence. You risk the distance growing in your marriage. You risk losing your marriage. In many marriage the idea of risk reward is a recurring theme. Here's the thing about risk reward... IT'S ALL ABOUT FEAR! Fear will stop you in your tracks as you ask yourself statements similar to these: I never had the conversations I wanted to have. I never asked for what I wanted. I never did what I should have. Why? The RISK seemed too large and yet... what about the reward? The reward is... Deeper emotional connection. Living out your lives fully. You're loved more for who you truly are. Open and honest conversations. Long lasting marriage. Sex like never before. You get to choose each day what the risk reward is in your marriage. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the risk reward that you face when making a change in your marriage and why you need to focus on the reward not the risk. EPISODE SPONSOR | Strategic Marriage Coaching with Alisa You get help for every other area of your life, why not your marriage. If you have been struggling with areas of your marriage and are tired of the struggle, tired of not knowing what to do or say, now is the time to take action. You’ve heard the results on the show of clients who have had transformation. What are you waiting for? Learn more about a Strategic Marriage Coaching with Alisa today! 3 Ways to Overcome Your Fears Bo's Cafe 7 Days of Sex Challenge Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What would your marriage look like if you and your spouse were having sex on a consistent basis? Maybe for the two of you it would be one, two or even 4 times a week and yet your not quite sure how to make this happen. For this to happen it takes planning and a clear understanding of how it will benefit your marriage. It doesn't just happen. You will need to be intentional as you invest your time and efforts into your marriage. It’s time to get radical in your marriage and make a change as you commit to your spouse and implement The Intimacy Lifestyle. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about how you can begin to implement The Intimacy Lifestyle into your marriage as you experience a new level of closeness both emotionally and sexually. EPISODE SPONSOR | Top 10 Ways to Initiate Sex Summertime is here! It’s time for relaxing and for fun. It’s so important that with all that you have going on this summer that initiating does NOT take a back seat to all of the other activities that the two of you have going on. Make sure that the two of you have a summer to remember. Grab you Top 10 Ways to Initiate Sex today! He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path Healthy Sex Drive, Healthy You: What Your Libido Reveals About Your Life by Diana Hoppe M.D. Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The truth is that every couple goes through cycles of good times and tough times. The bigger issue is when those cycles last indefinitely and no one takes action. I want out. I don’t want to do this anymore. It’s too hard. You may have said these to your spouse or vise versa. Either way it's time to shift the tide in your marriage before it is to late. According to couples therapist, Carrie Cole: The average couple waits six years from the time they recognize relationship problems until the time they try therapy. By then, it's often too late—the problems in the marriage can corrode it to the point where it may be unsalvageable. So play it safe and schedule a coaching session if you're struggling. Why? Because by the time you hear I want out... Your spouse has been dealing with the situation for years. They have checked out. They have often stopped caring and have begun making plans to do life on their own. If you marriage has disconnect in it If you are too busy to spend time together If you are not talking If you are not having sex Then it is time to be intentional and take action in your marriage so you will never hear the words I want out again. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about what to do when one of you says to the other -- I want out, I’m done! EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Steps to Save Your Marriage In this free report you will receive The 7 simple steps to salvage even the most damaged and beyond repair marriage (these are the same steps that brought our own marriage back from the brink of divorce). Grab 7 Steps to Save Your Marriage today! 7 Signs You're In a Loveless Marriage How I Saved My Marriage Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices