Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

Today we're answering some more listener questions! We'll be tackling some questions about moving too fast in relationships, relationship hierarchy, and primary versus non-primary relationships. Want your question answered on a future Q&A episode? Become on of our Supercast subscribers at multiamory.com/join on a sliding scale!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about metamour relationships with Alex Alberto. Alex is a queer author, publisher, and filmmaker. Last year, Alex published their memoir, “Entwined: Essays on Polyamory and Creating Home” through Quilted Press, a collective of independent authors they co-founded. This year, Alex is producing a short film called “Coming Out Polyamorous for Thanksgiving,” which is based on an essay from Entwined. Alex also leads writers' retreats and courses at Scrappy Literary, and some of their classes focus on helping writers of all levels write about non-monogamy and unconventional relationships. Alex is originally from Montreal but lives in Upstate New York with their partner, metamour, and kids.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're excited to welcome Diana Adams and Brett Chamberlin back to the show to discuss advocacy, relationship rights, and more. Diana Adams (they/them) is an international legal leader in advocacy for queer family forms beyond the romantic dyad. Diana is the Executive Director of Chosen Family Law Center, a nonprofit advocating for diverse family structures, & runs a boutique law firm providing mediation services nationwide for those hoping to negotiate intentional or polyamorous families. Diana’s TED talk ‘Why US Laws Must Expand Beyond the Nuclear Family’ explains their expansive vision of family. Find them on all socials @DianaAdamsEsq. Brett Chamberlin (he/him) is a social impact organizer with over a decade of leadership experience building a more just and joyous future. He is the founder and Executive Director of OPEN, the Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy. Prior to launching OPEN, Brett worked in the environmental movement as the Director of Community Engagement at The Story of Stuff Project and the co-founder of the Post Landfill Action Network. Check out the legislative toolkit from OPEN for ways to help further local legislation in your area: harvard.turtl.co/story/polyamory-legislative-toolkit.Download the 5 calls app to contact your representatives and hold them accountable: https://5calls.org/.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're back with another Q&A episode! Today we're answering some questions from our Supercast subscribers about organizing local polyamory meetups, how to handle guilt you feel even when a partner is telling you not to feel guilty, and strategies to deal with missing a partner you don't live with. If you want to have your question answered on a future Q&A episode, visit multiamory.com/join to become one of our Supercast subscribers!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our audiobook is out now at all major audiobook retailers! Learn more at multiamory.com/book>Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're tackling a heavy topic: denial. Most of us have dealt with this at one point or another, especially when it comes to relationships, whether it's denial that that relationship is over or whether or not someone is attracted to you. We'll be doing a deep dive into why we often fall into denial, whether or not denial can be a helpful force in our lives, and how to know if you're in denial. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about equity, equality, and fairness in all relationships, but particularly non-monogamous ones. We'll discuss the differences between equity and equality, perceived fairness, equity among multiple partners, and more! As always, we'll have some practical takeaways at the end of the episode to help you be more aware of equity and fairness in your relationships and how to communicate about it better. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're chatting about romantic relationships, friendships, and the ways we often treat the two differently. Why do we think of our romantic partners as our most intimate and important connections, and yet sometimes don't treat them with the same respect and kindness we do our friends? We'll be talking about why we tend to do this and how we can foster more understanding in romantic relationships. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about attention and attentiveness as a relationship resource. It's natural for us to want to feel loved, important, and listened to, especially by our partners and family. But distraction happens, particularly nowadays in a digital age, and if your partner is distracted by work, their phone, other partners, or just other life priorities, it can be really distressing to feel like there’s a lack of attention. We're going to be discussing why this can be so upsetting, the most important things to know about attentiveness, and how to cope if you’re feeling that lack of attention. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're answering some more listener questions, and we're also being joined by Abbey and Liam from the Evolving Love Project to get their perspectives on non-monogamy and parenting. We'll be discussing some questions about parenting, meeting like-minded people, guilt, and missing non-nesting partners.Abbey and Liam have been together for over twelve years and non-monogamous for over a decade. Together they started the Evolving Love Project which hosts monthly conversation nights for non-monogamous or curious folk in Canberra and Sydney, Australia and co-host the acclaimed podcast Evolving Love. Abbey also publishes weekly on Substack with her musings on non-monogamy, parenthood & sexuality. They believe that by removing the stigma from these topics, collectively we can push the culture in a positive, caring and more loving direction.If you want one of your questions answered on a future Q&A episode, consider joining our exclusive community!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about the need for approval many of us feel every day and the impact it can have on our relationships. We're discussing what approval-seeking and people-pleasing are, whether seeking approval is always harmful in a relationship, pros and cons of seeking approval, and more. As always, we'll also share some actionable tools at the end of the episode to increase self-esteem, reduce anxiety, and keep relationships healthy and happy. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we're focusing on solo polyamory! We'll be covering what solo polyamory is, its variations and the different forms it can take, and why you might want to be solo polyamorous. We'll also go into detail about criticism of solo polyamory and what its implications might be on your romantic relationships. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about romanticization and its role in our relationships, our lives, and more. We all idealize something, whether it's a place, a person, or a choice, but what happens when our idealized version clashes with reality? We'll be discussing whether romanticization is helpful for us and our life choices or if it ultimately hurts us in the long run. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're back with another Q&A from our lovely subscribers! Today, we're discussing mono-normativity, metamour relationships, and polysaturation as we answer some questions posed by our listeners. Visit multiamory.com/join to become part of our excellent community!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're bringing back a special conversation between Dedeker and Orit Krug! Orit is an award-winning Board-Certified Dance/Movement Therapist and Licensed Creative Arts Therapist. Orit helps individuals & couples expand their capacity for self-love and intimacy in relationships by processing past trauma stored in the body. Orit is polyamorous, partnered, and a parent to a toddler.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're going back to some polyamory 101 basics and talking about opening up previously monogamous relationships. We'll be talking about some helpful things to consider before opening up your relationship, what to do during the critical period where things are shifting, and how to maintain your partnership(s) after the initial opening up. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Happy New Year! We're starting back up again this year talking about negativity bias, how it affects our media landscape, and in turn, how it affects our wellbeing and relationships as well. We'll go over some research about how consuming negative or fearful news can bleed over into your relationships, and share some ways to combat the effects so you can stay informed but also have happier partnerships.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about the green-eyed monster...envy! We've talked a lot about jealousy in the past, but this time we're focusing on envy, which is often conflated with jealousy. Sometimes we feel inadequate or resentful in our relationships, but it doesn't quite feel like jealousy. You might be dealing with envy! For today's episode we're going to talk about the difference between envy and jealousy in non-traditional relationships, why you might be feeling envious, and as always, and as always, we'll discuss some practical tools for transforming envy into personal growth and stronger connections.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're welcoming back writer, director, actor, and producer Frank Arthur Smith to talk about non-monogamy in queer media.Frank is a queer writer/director/actor/producer originally from Boston. He was most recently staffed on children's comedy OCEAN EXPLORERS on YouTube. Previously, he wrote on Disney Channel’s RAVEN’S HOME. He also starred in Episode 5 of Emmy Award-nominated TIDYING UP WITH MARIE KONDO on Netflix.His LGBTQIA+ comedy series, OPEN TO IT, in which he stars, writes, directs, and Executive Produces, debuted at Outfest, the largest queer film festival in the world, and received over 1 million views online, before being acquired by OUTtv, a Canadian cable channel available in over 15 million homes, and US streaming service with over 1 million subscribers. The show can be seen worldwide at opentoitseries.com and features RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE stars Manila Luzon, Laganja Estranja, Honey Davenport, and Pandora Boxx, as well as Deaf drag queen influencers, Deafies in Drag.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're discussing conflict spirals, or what happens when you're arguing with a partner and it's no longer productive, you're exhausted, and you just want things to be over with. We're talking about how to stop that spiraling conflict, soothe yourself, and get back to a place where you can co-regulate with your partner instead of getting trapped in the same spiral again and again. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're joined by Jaime Gama of the popular Instagram account Gotitas de Poliamor. We'll be discussing non-monogamy, identity, community, and much more with him. Jaime is a psychologist with a master's in Gestalt psychotherapy who specializes in ethical relationships, both monogamous and non-monogamous. He uses his account to share his experience and journey deconstructing the ways he connects with his partners. At the moment he offers webinars, on-line sessions and is working on writing his first book. Find more about Jaime at www.gotitasdepoliamor.com, or follow him on Instagram @gotitasdepoliamor. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're back with a Q&A episode! We're answering some questions from our listeners and talking about balancing relationships and a burgeoning career, asking a partner to be more visible in their life, and how to reconcile with decisions others make that affect you. If you want a question of yours answered on one of our future Q&A episodes, consider becoming a member of our community!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're revisiting the topic of marriage and non-monogamy, talking about why you might want to get married, why you might NOT want to get married, and some considerations you might want to discuss with a partner if you're non-monogamous. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For today's episode, we're joined by Millie and Nick from Decolonizing Love for a spectacular conversation about polyamory, intersectionality, colonialism, hierarchy, and much, much more. Millie Boella (she/they) and Nick (he/him) are a polyamorous couple from Toronto, Canada, who have been together for 14 years. Millie, of mixed Kenyan and diverse heritage, has always embraced polyamory, influenced by her Maasai background. She founded the Toronto Non-Monogamous BIPOC group in 2017 and is a professional writer. Nick, of Italian and Greek descent, is a healthcare consultant. He works on various community causes, including projects that help men unlearn toxic masculinity. In 2021, they co-founded Decolonizing Love, advocating for polyamory through a decolonial lens. Their work aims to make polyamory accessible and intersectional.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For this week's episode, the Multiamory crew is taking a much-needed break, and featuring episode 308 of Normalizing Non-Monogamy: Bru + Mark! Hosts Emma and Fin talk with Bru and Mark about their guests' relatively recent journey of opening up their long partnership. For Emma and Fin, life is all about seeking out adventure, embracing the chaos, and meeting amazing people along the way. They are in their mid thirties, met in seventh grade, and have been together since their freshman year of college. A year or so into their relationship it was obvious that exploring everything life had to offer was part of who they were as individuals, and as a team. They were very young at the time and neither had really experienced the world of dating, so they created a way to explore aspects of the dating world without ending their relationship, through non-monogamy. Fast forward about 11 years and they decided to start a weekly podcast called Normalizing Non-Monogamy in 2018. They absolutely love meeting new people and hearing their stories and through this podcast they get to interview people from all over the world who are exploring non-monogamy on their own terms. The hope is that if they can get enough of those stories out into the world that it will provide a resource for anyone who is considering non-monogamy. They also want to show that non-monogamy is more common than most people think and that it can be done in an ethical and consensual way. Overall, the mission is to inspire people to embrace their true selves so that, together, we can open minds and live authentically without shame.Find more about them and Normalizing Non-Monogamy at https://www.normalizingnonmonogamy.com/!Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices