
Fully Functional Parents
419 episodes — Page 2 of 9
If This Table Could Talk! (It’s Frat Party Day!!
EWhat IS Your Shoe Size, Marco Rubio?
EPotpourri – lots of dumb things that we had to catch up on! Potholes, running in the rain, Trump buying shoes for people!!
Eliot Spitzer, Howard Dean! Come Back! What You Did Wasn’t That Bad!!
EAnd a soup of your own filth!
Captain Obvious in Corporate America
EAnd giving up things for lent!
Boobs and A Dickie!
EThe new business casual! And my mom doubts me!
What’s Going On, Paul Rudd? We Can Hang Out.
EAnd more things we didn’t know as kids. A double episode for your Saturday!
Couch Cracks!
EAnd music festivals and not being friends with people!
Who is the Prophet Here?
EAnd penises on the new Bills Stadium?!
Do Me A Solid! Don’t Say Crotch!
EAnd other things our parents said and did!
Hitting Roosters with Rocks!
ELike Emmanuel Clase?!
Movers! And Pockets! and Tingles!
EArchive: July 2024. Unedited because I don’t bother to edit anymore!
Flu Week!
EA classically boring episode about language and school break week!
Stop Whining! And Have a Dinner Party!
EAnd we’re going to invite Sandra Lee!!
Double Episode: Hot Old Men like Colin Firth!
ESo many things!
Sacrificing for Kids!
ENo more kid play places!
Call Your Parents! They Miss You!
ESkiing again!!
Lies Lies Lies!!
EAnd no kid fights!?
Have You Tried David’s Cookies?!
ECause you should!
Yo Yo Yo! It’s MTV Raps!
EMtv was everything!!
Idolizing Bad People!
EAnti heroes! And teaching our kids to love them too!
Virtual Learning! IS It Learning?!
EScrappers in the bathroom!
Jealous?! We’ve Got the Best Friends!!
EAnd we don’t care to keep up with the Joneses!!
Burial Plots?!
EObjectively, Our Best Episode! (Go Bills!)
ENo more talk radio!
Bowling is the Macadamia Nut of Sports.
EBut it’s so fun!
Tooths with Roots!
ERipping teeth out by hand!
Shame, Shame, Shame. (Shaming David for All the Wrongs!)
EAnd processed foods!
I Didn’t Want to See My Friend’s Mom Naked!
EAnd more skiing! More!’
Bravo. I went skiing.
EAnd New Year’s resolutions are for idiots
Skiing in … 2023?!
EArchival footage! Cause it’s vacation!!
DK Metcalf, Come On Now!!!
ESquandered potential!!
Holiday Gifts and Rick Moranis Giving Me the Tingles…
EWhat a pain in the ass!
We Went to College!
EAnd sometimes it was hard and lonely!
Stuffing Your Stocking!
EAnd be a Tom, not a Fredo!
Aaron’s Super Power: Seeing Farts!
EAnd midget mayhem?!
David’s Assessment of 4th Grade Girls: A Family Heirloom?!
EAnd living in a cold climate!! Tom and Jerry’s for all!!
The Pope-ener!!
EThe only thing worth saving?!
What’s Your Superpower?!
EAnd ?!
Doubling Up with an Ode to Montreal!!
EWe love you, you frozen icy tundra!!
Pickles on Trees!
EA Sunday special!
The Popomatic Bubble!
ELicense plates too!
Guess What I Just Did in the Shower!!
ETMI time too!!
A Showgirls Thanksgiving!
EWtf Elizabeth Berkeley?!9
FFP VP: 2026!
EWayne Newton! Buffets! Cabanas! Join us next year!
Hanging with Mr. Cooper!
EAnd the Weather Channel!
What’s for Dinner?!??
EAn empathy?
Why People Retire! and More Billy Joel!!
EAnd don’t see Materialists!!
Friendsgiving 2025! Feed Me!!
EToo bad you didn’t come, it was fantastic!
Is Our Dog Trying to Kill Us?
EAnd leaf blowing blows!!
No Complaining about My Complaining!
EUber! Waymo! And I learn how to read GPS!