Baconsale

JEEEEEEEAN! Three years have passed since Baconsale reviewed X-Men: Apocalypse. During that time, many had forgotten that this rebooted series was still making movies. But Dark Phoenix has arisen in theaters, causing many to wonder if this will be the resurgence of mutant film greatness, or if it will leave the franchise in a pile of burning ashes. And, as always, the first part of our BaconBit review is spoiler free. Press play to hear if Kent's and Joel's reviews are in cosmic harmony.

When the weather's fine, we've got summer blockbusters on our mind. We've created sixteen categories, such as Best Soundtrack, Surprise Hit, Biggest Letdown, Most Mind-Blowing Visual Effects, Best Lead Actress and, yes, Greatest of All Time. Kent and Joel probably stressed about their answers more than they should have, and they're worried about giving too many "primary answers," but we hope you enjoy this episode all about some of the biggest movies in cinematic history. Pop some popcorn, shut off your brain a little and press play to hear this explosion-fueled, CGI-laden episode of Baconsale!

Hail to the king, baby! On this BaconBit, Jacob and Kent are reviewing Godzilla: King of the Monsters. Joel didn't see it, but he's never been wowed by a Godzilla movie anyway. And, as per usual, we tend to get sidetracked as we talk about the history of Godzilla and monster movies in general. Will Kent and Jacob let the child inside of them enjoy a film about giant monsters fighting each other? Or will their cynicism get in the way? Press play! And don't fear, the first 15 minutes are spoiler free.

Valar morghulis! On this episode of Baconsale, we're discussing a small, hipster TV series you probably haven't heard of: Game of Thrones. Kent is a big fan of the show, Joel watched the entire thing once (edited) and Jacob gave up after the first season. However, this episode is NOT a scene-by-scene breakdown of the story. In fact, it's pretty spoiler-free (and family friendly). Instead, we're talking to those people who HAVEN'T watched this cultural phenomenon, and we're asking the question, "why not?" We hope you enjoy this introduction to the world of Westeros. Press play to finally understand what people mean when they say, "Winter is coming."

Make way for Fresh Prince Ali! We're ready to review one of the latest cash-grabs, er, we mean live-action remakes of a Disney animated classic. This time, however, it was Jacob and Kent who saw the new movie, while Joel didn't. Will Naomi Scott's performance as Jasmine charm the guys? Or will Will Smith's blue CGI face get in the way? And, if for some reason, you're worried about spoilers, don't worry—the first 10 minutes are spoiler-free. Press play, because you ain't never heard a BaconBit like this!

It's finally time for the episode the listener has been waiting for: Baconsale is tiering pets! Please. Contain your excitement. We're taking 22 domesticated animals (Wait! 23! We totally forgot about monkeys!) and ranking them as a Tier 1, Tier 2 or Tier 3 pet. We also share some stories about our history with pets. Jacob feels rodents are useless, Joel thinks horses are a little creepy, and somehow every discussion ends up relating to Kent's dating life. Press play to hear us argue like cats and dogs!

Again, we have no idea how this actually happened, but people actually showed up to meet us at our From Scratch event this past Saturday. Actually, most of the people came for the free Baconsale Burger, but we were still happy to see them. And on this BaconBit, we'll discuss behind-the-scenes thoughts, our experiences meeting the listener, and possible events in the future. Oh, and we recorded your shout-outs and will be playing them at the end of the show. Press play to hear how Kent, Joel and Jacob feel it all went.

Now what Baconsale is about to say may sound a little crazy, but today we're talking about conspiracy theories with our guest, Scott Sprague. And the truths we're exposing in this episode cover everything from Home Alone to royal vampires to celebrity clones to child abductions. It's all connected! WARNING! This subject matter gets pretty heavy at times, especially when we're discussing true crimes like the case of JonBenét Ramsey. It's not explicit, but it's definitely intense, and Joel feels obligated to try and lighten the mood with dad jokes. So put on your tinfoil hats and press play!

Now that the Endgame has ended, it's time for Baconsale to talk about the other movies coming out this summer. Kent wants you to appreciate his hipster film picks, Joel seems to have a grudge against Disney, and Jacob audibly judges both of them. Also, for the sake of the children, whenever potentially questionable words are brought up, the guys try S-P-E-L-ling them out. However, sometimes that makes the word sound even less family friendly. Whoops. Press play and allow us to cinematically guide you through May to August of 2019.

The Infinity Saga has reached its conclusion, therefore it's time for Baconsale to rank all 22 films in the Marvel Cinematic Universe from worst to best. Kent, Joel and Jacob have combined their individual rankings into one Baconsale-approved list and now they have to live with the consequences. Joel will try his best to keep Kent and Jacob from being too negative, but it's an uphill battle. And while there are spoilers for some of the older movies, don't worry, we banished all the spoilers for Avengers: Endgame to our BaconBit review of that film. Press play and play along as we take a stroll down Marvel memory lane.

Since Avengers: Endgame is over three hours long, we decided that we could make this BaconBit a little longer than normal. The first 15 minutes are spoiler-free, but then we get into what happens in this film, who lives, who dies and which plot points don't make a lot of sense (wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff). Will this finally be the Marvel movie that wins Kent over? Or will it simply confirm what he's always felt about this franchise? Avenge the fallen. Press play.

We've talked about the lovely and talented Ms. Kate Beckinsale many times on Baconsale, but we've never really discussed her movies...until now! Join Kent, Joel and Jacob as they tell her story in their thick and sultry voices, and then rank her top five and bottom five films. We even got up on our tiptoes to find a film that Ms. Beckinsale would probably like to forget about. *insert creepy laugh here* Press play to hear Kate Beckinsale introduce a Baconsale episode about Kate Beckinsale.

We have no idea how this actually happened, but we invented a hamburger that they're actually going to serve at an actual restaurant in Salt Lake called From Scratch. And you'll be able to get your actual hands on The Baconsale Burger for FREE during our event on May 11, 2019—all you have to do is download the GrubPass app and show it to an employee when you order that day. Plus, Kent, Joel and Jacob will be hanging out at From Scratch from 4 - 6 p.m. (MDT), so come join us for some free food and quasi-enjoyable conversation. Now press play to hear all the juicy details, including a live taste test of vegan pasta. Wait, what?

We couldn't let our contestants leave the Baconcave without taking on the UNDEFEATED Team JK in a pop culture trivia battle. Newly crowned Listener Spencer leads the pack, with Jonathan and Listener Emeritus Adrienne by his side. But will Team JK be able to churn out another win? Or will Jacob's buzzers and oddly paced reading get in their way? Find out by pressing play!

Wow! Baconsale has done 200 episodes? That's insane! And speaking of insanity, we're letting Jacob run the show today as Adrienne, Spencer and Jonathan battle it out to see who will become The Listener for the next year. He's got around 86 rounds of "fun" ready for our contestants, including a fast-food taste test, musical lyric trivia and guessing what's in Kent's & Joel's hearts. We'd like to give special thanks to the Reverse Listener for helping with the questions, and to you, the listener, for joining us for the past 200 episodes. We wouldn't have been able to do it without you. Now stop reading this episode blurb and press play already!

Ding! Imagine you're on an elevator with a movie studio executive and you want to pitch them an idea in the limited amount of time you have on the ride up. That's the premise for today's episode of Baconsale. Kent and Joel have picked some of the fake film titles you submitted, and they must create an original pitch for each one. And then it's up to Jacob to decide which pitches are greenlit, which he does seemingly at random. Join us as we cross genres, mix actors, select directors and generally have fun making up strange stories based on your suggestions. Press the button for the top floor and then press play.

SHAZAM! Kent and Joel left Jacob behind to see the latest DC film starring Zachary Levi as Captain Marvel, er, we mean Shazam. Kent even saw the movie twice, but does that mean that he liked it? Or is he just a glutton for punishment? Listen to hear if the cheesy jokes and lighthearted tone worked for us here at Baconsale. And don't worry if you haven't seen the movie yet, you can still listen to the first half of this episode, which is spoiler-free. Now press play so that our powers may flow through you.

ようこそ! Today on Baconsale we're discussing anime! No, not the weird kind you're thinking of right now, but rather the very accessible (yet still somewhat unusual) movies of Studio Ghibli—one of the most successful animation studios in the world. Our guest, Kris Anderson, challenged Joel and Kent to watch all 21 of their feature films, which they've done, and we're ready to tier them and talk about Japanese folklore, Hayao Miyazaki, aviation, Totoro, fantasy stories and shape-shifting raccoons. Please honor our podcast by pressing the play button.

It feels like we've been making you wait for-e-ver, but Baconsale is gonna fly now and finally declare the winner of our sports movie tournament. We've also brought on the KSL Newsradio sports director, Alex Kirry, to help us go the distance. He'll have you at "Hello." And if we don't pick your favorite, don't cry, because there's no crying in brackets! Wax on. Wax off. Then press play. And you can print off your own advanced bracket at Baconsale.com and play along.

Fast food is soooo 2015. Fast-casual restaurants are the new hotness. Therefore, it's up to Baconsale to rank dining establishments such as Panda Express, Chipotle, Jimmy John's, Zaxby's, Five Guys, Café Rio, Zupas and more as Tier 1, Tier 2 or Tier 3. And while Jacob seems to have an unlimited amount of Tier 2's, Kent's diet is ruining his ratings and Joel seems more focused on birthday freebies. To confirm your order of this Baconsale episode, please press play.

Who's up for a little March Madness? Today Baconsale is bringing our A-game and beginning our sports movie tournament. We're tackling baseball, football and basketball films, along with a few draft picks from such arenas as golf, hockey, racing and boxing. However, since we got hardly a speck of athletic ability, we decided to bring on Alex Kirry, the KSL Newsradio sports director and host of KSL's Unrivaled, as our guest to help us get through this first round of the bracket. Press play! You can do it! It's all in the hips. Print your own bracket at Baconsale.com and play along at home!

Welcome to Baconsale 2.5! Based on your feedback and some wild ideas from Jacob, we've updated our Patreon account (patreon.com/Baconsale). You'll still get exclusive perks, like patron-only episodes, behind-the-scenes access and free merch, but we've added some new incentives and an entirely new tier! We're thankful for all of your support so far, patrons, and we look forward to continuing to grow our podcast with your support! Press play to hear all the details or visit www.patreon.com/Baconsale.

My name is Baconsale! And have we ever told you that you look just like Buddy Holly? Because today we're discussing one of greatest alternative albums ever made, the Blue Album by Weezer. And as we record in the garage, we're going to discuss each song as the music is playing. It's an idea that has been only in dreams until now. Plus, (say it ain't so!) we're going to rank each track on Weezer's debut self-titled album. If you want to support our podcast, hear our words as we talk away (so please press play).

Who needs a host? This year's Academy Awards may have been the most disappointing yet for film-lovers, but those who won our Oscar predictions contest are definitely going to be happy with the results. Congratulations! Also, we reveal which member of Baconsale owes the others a pizza, as well as what happens to Jacob's score when we keep him from cheating. Press play to hear how green our book is!

This year's Academy Awards were kind of disappointing, weren't they? Well, Baconsale has your back. We've created our own Bacademy Podwards™ to honor those films of 2018 that were truly deserving of praise. We've come up with our own nominees and even some new categories and we're ready to present them to you just like the Oscars, except much shorter and with less politics. We do have an In Memoriam section, though. Press play to hear who is going to bring home the Bacon™ this year!

Baconsale is doing things a little differently this time. We're doing our Oscar predictions show as a BaconBit. A really long BaconBit…. We're selecting winners for each category of the 91st Academy Awards—which is heavily influenced by the BAFTAs, according to Joel. This time we made Jacob choose first so he couldn't cheat. And with pizza delivery on the line, the stakes have never been higher. Plus, we're doing a GIVEAWAY this episode! Submit your Oscar predictions on our official ballot, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter and at Baconsale.com before 4 p.m. MST on Sunday, February 24, 2019 for a chance to win a fabulous film-related prize! Press play to hear Jacob try and pronounce the names of each nominee!

That awkward moment when Baconsale does another etiquette show. 85% of people aren't brave enough to read this episode blurb, but for those who do, you'll find out that today Kent, Joel and Jacob are going to break the internet as they lay out some ground rules for Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. We'll take on such topics as posting frequency, fake profiles, taking pictures of food, trolls, vaguebooking and more. Plus, we're sharing social media pet peeves that we got from you, the listener! Hit play and share this post, because Bill Gates has promised to divide his fortune with everyone that does.

Once upon a time there was light in our lives, and that time was last February when Baconsale talked about love songs, so we decided to once again discuss romantic tunes that are always on our mind. Say "Hello" to Kent, Joel and Jacob's picks for such categories as Best Bitter Song, Reminds You of a Childhood Crush, Strangest Lyrics and Best Love Song from a Musical. And if we don't choose your song, let us un-break your heart as we introduce you to some new ones. All I ask of you is to press play and have a wonderful tonight! Go to Baconsale.com to find the Spotify playlist of all the songs we talked about on this episode.

We've switched things up in this episode of Baconsale and let Kent & Jacob take on the main discussion while Joel is the moderator. Why? Because we're giving an **EXXXXTREME HIZZTORY LESSON** on the PlayStation console and modern gaming. And as we offer fun facts, game suggestions and quiz questions, we'll try to keep it interesting for gamers and non-gamers alike. PS, we want you to press play!

*sniff* We promised ourselves we wouldn’t do this! *sniff* Today on Baconsale we're discussing films from our past and present that made us get emotional. To no one's surprise, Joel basically cries at everything (including talking about sad movie moments) and Kent barely cries at anything, but we even get some insight as to what makes Jacob cry. Join us as we open up, wear our hearts on our sleeves and show off our sensitive sides. *sob* Grab a box of tissues and press play!

FACT: This is an episode of Baconsale. FACT: Kent and Joel will offer predictions for the upcoming year, such as which celebrity couples will break up, which fashion trends will make a comeback and which films will flop in 2019. FACT: Due to his illness, Jacob will repeatedly try to fact-check Kent and Joel's facts, only to find that their facts are, in fact, facts. FACT: Some of our facts are merely strongly worded opinions. FACT: You should press play and listen to this episode of Baconsale.

It all comes down to this. After years in the dog house, M. Night Shyamalan is finishing his unique trilogy with an unusual movie that could make or break his comeback streak. But will Glass live up to the hype? Jacob hasn't seen it yet, so we sent him to an institution that will take good care of him, but Kent, Joel, Patricia, Dennis and The Beast are here to discuss a sequel that has been in the making for 19 years. And if you're feeling a little fragile, don't worry, the first part of our Glass review is spoiler-free. I mean, we may spoil Unbreakable and Split a little in our opening discussion, but we'll warn you before we start spoiling Glass.

Season five is alive! And Baconsale is back to tell you about the best & worst movies that we watched last season. As per usual, Kent only chooses movies that were released in 2018, Joel picks films that he watched for the first time last year, and Jacob agrees with whatever Kent says. 2018 wasn't a great year for cinema, but we're here to inform you about the hidden gems and help you avoid the landmines. Press play to hear how to correctly pronounce "Gotti"!

Surprise! Yes, we know we already did our season finale of Baconsale, and yes, we're all trapped in rubble after the cave-in, but we couldn't let the year pass without talking about Jason Momoa's abs -er, I mean Aquaman! After all, this film is a culmination of Joel's challenge to Kent back in February during our "Too Many Spoilers" BaconBit. It's also a chance to see if Kent will maintain his DC bias, even though they're becoming more Marvel-like with each movie. And just in case you haven't seen the film yet, don't worry, the first 21 minutes are spoiler-free! Press play to hear what we think about Glub, Glub, Punch, Punch!

As season four of Baconsale draws to a close, we're taking a look back at all we did this year. We're giving out finger boops like candy as we discuss our favorite moments (Mom show!), the best episode art (did someone say teleportation fumes?), our biggest regrets (veggie burgers), how many babies were born (SPOILER ALERT: Kent is pregnant), behind-the-scenes stories (binge-watching Hitchcock) and goals for the next season (sibling show?). And as we wrap up another season of this podcast, you can rest assured that everything will end normally and nothing crazy will happen, right? Press play to hear our final episode of 2018!

Baconsale is counting down to Christmas with an episode dedicated to Hallmark original films and other made-for-TV holiday rom-coms. Kent, Joel and Jacob left the big city and traveled to a quaint town where we watched some of your suggestions and we're now ready to review them. And after a musical montage where we decorate a tree and go ice skating, we take a Hallmark channel quiz and guess storylines based only on the title. Look! It's snowing! Tell your quirky best friend it's time to press play!

'Twas the first Baconsale of this Christmas season. And Kent, Joel and Jacob will soon commit treason. For they have decided to rank and to tier The holiday movies you watch every year. From stop-motion Rudolph in the year '64 To CGI remakes of films done before. We hope you enjoy this judgmental journey But if you're enraged, please don't call your attorney. Press play to see where we place your Christmas favorites!

Jacob has been talking to Baconsale about The Last Kingdom (Kingdom of Heaven?) for some time now in private, and we finally agreed to let him talk about The Last Kingdom (Fallen Kingdom?) on this BaconBit. He has watched the whole thing on Netflix and he's excited to pitch it to you, the listener. So excited, in fact, that he's willing to let Kent and Joel eat candy while on the air so they will shut up and let him speak. Press play to see if your interest will be piqued by The Last Kingdom (Kingdom Hearts?).

Don't Worry, Be Happy, because Baconsale is finally going to Whip It and finish our 80s one-hit wonder tournament! At times We're Walking on Sunshine when we agree, but other choices will make Joel call Kent a Maniac. Nevertheless, we put our Heart and Soul into this Funkytown of new wave, pop and rock music from 1980s and The Promise is we'll declare an ultimate winner and finally end this NeverEnding Story. Come On Eileen, don't be Too Shy. Press play! Print the advanced 80s bracket at Baconsale.com.

Hey fellas! Since we did a Man Crush show earlier this year, we felt it was only fair to give the ladies equal time. So, on this episode Baconsale, we're going to talk about our favorite females. We also brought back Lindsay, a real-live woman, onto the show to keep us in check and make sure we don't cross any lines, such as Kent saying one of his picks has a "broken rodent face." Listen as we crown such categories as Girl Next Door, Classically Beautiful, Best Smile, Most Attractive Musician and Hottest Hero. Press play to hear us try our best to not have Kate Beckinsale win almost every single category.

Join Kent, Joel and Jacob as we talk about Newt, Tina, other Jacob, Queenie, Credence, Leta, Theseus, Nagini, Yusuf, Abernathy, McGonagall, Bunty, Dumbledore, Grindelwald and every other character and storyline they crammed into this sequel to the spin-off of the Harry Potter franchise. Joel didn't feel the last Fantastic Beasts movie deserved to be part of the Wizarding World, but will this one change his mind? And were Kent and Jacob able to stay awake during the screening? Press play to hear our review of this movie. The first 13 minutes are spoiler free!

Ohhhhh yeeeeeah! Believe It or Not, Baconsale is Puttin' on the Ritz and doing an 80s one-hit wonder tournament. We've created a bracket of new wave, rock and pop tunes that'll make you want to Party All the Time, even if you don't remember who the artist is. It Takes Two votes to make a song Breakout to the next round. The tournaments may be our Obsession, but we're only advancing one round on this episode. We'll take a Buffalo Stance and declare an ultimate winner next time. Relax. All I Need is for you to press play! Print your own 80s one-hit wonder bracket and find our Spotify playlist at Baconsale.com.

Casey Smith had an idea. He wanted to know if Kent and Joel could guess what movie he was thinking of through a simple game of 20 questions, so we invited him to join us on this episode to give it a shot. What we found out is that Jacob likes to pick obscure movies, Joel doesn't have a good poker face and Kent is fiercely competitive when his film cred is on the line. Press play to see if our patron can stump Baconsale!

We couldn't let this Halloween season pass without discussing one of the most talked about Netflix series of the year, The Haunting of Hill House. If you haven't heard about it, all you need to know is that it stars Carla Gugino and that kid from E.T., and apparently it's so scary that it makes people pass out. Kent, Joel and Jacob watched it, regained consciousness and now they're ready to talk about what they thought about this ghostly family drama. And if you haven't seen it, don't worry, the first 16 minutes are spoiler free. Don't look now, but The Bent-Neck Lady is standing right behind you and she wants you to press play.

As we're wrapping up the Halloween season, Baconsale decided to take a journey into one of the most disturbing places of all: Jacob's mind. Jacob has written another Choose-Your-Own-Adventure-style game and is placing Joel and Kent in the middle of the horrifying action. Listen as they make dangerous decisions with each roll of the die and battle iconic movie monsters and a demented fast food mascot in a parallel reality. My dear demon, be my listener now, I plead. Press play!

As soon as Burger King announced their Nightmare King—a green hamburger that is reported to cause bad dreams—we knew we had to try it. We also threw in the Frozen Fanta Scary Black Cherry slushie, just for good measure. But will these creepy fast food concoctions invade our peaceful slumber? Or is the only scary thing how many calories they have in them? Press play to hear everything (and we mean everything) about what happened after we ate this Halloween-themed burger.

WARNING! If this episode gets out of hand, it's not our fault. We asked you, the listener, to send in horror movie pitches and the results were…interesting. We got everything from horrifying tales of skinwalkers to strange stories about singing CPR dummies. And after reading (and sometimes mocking) each pitch, Kent, Joel and Jacob are going to decide if the project gets green-lit or not. Press play to join us in your descent into madness!

It was a dark and stormy night in the Baconcave, so we decided to share some of our favorite selections from Alvin Schwartz's notorious children's book series, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Kent and Joel take turns reading such classic tales as "The Hook," "The Babysitter," "The Haunted House" and "The Ghost with the Bloody Fingers," all while trying their best to not be freaked out by Stephen Gammell's horrific illustrations and Jacob's indifferent attitude. Dim the lights, gather 'round the campfire, and press play to enjoy some fantastically freaky Halloween folklore!

5….4….3....2….1….Blast off! Kent and Joel saw First Man, the Neil Armstrong biopic, and they're ready to let you know what they think about it. Will Ryan Gosling's good looks and Damien Chazelle's directing win Kent over? Does Joel feel like the film is unpatriotic? Can there be any spoilers for a historically-based movie about the first man to walk on the moon? Press play and find out! And, for some reason, the first part is spoiler-free.

Don't be frightened, children of the night. Ve vant to tell you about vampires! Baconsale has done a lot of research about blood-sucking demons, and we're bringing a lot of new facts and folklore into the light of day. We'll discuss what causes vampirism, how to tell if you're a vampire, and how to kill undead coffin-dwellers. We're also ready to share with you our Baconsale-approved vampire movies, including everything from Nosferatu to Dracula Untold. Babe! I need you to press play on our latest Halloween episode!