Baconsale

Fast food is soooo 2015. Fast-casual restaurants are the new hotness. Therefore, it's up to Baconsale to rank dining establishments such as Panda Express, Chipotle, Jimmy John's, Zaxby's, Five Guys, Café Rio, Zupas and more as Tier 1, Tier 2 or Tier 3. And while Jacob seems to have an unlimited amount of Tier 2's, Kent's diet is ruining his ratings and Joel seems more focused on birthday freebies. To confirm your order of this Baconsale episode, please press play.

Who's up for a little March Madness? Today Baconsale is bringing our A-game and beginning our sports movie tournament. We're tackling baseball, football and basketball films, along with a few draft picks from such arenas as golf, hockey, racing and boxing. However, since we got hardly a speck of athletic ability, we decided to bring on Alex Kirry, the KSL Newsradio sports director and host of KSL's Unrivaled, as our guest to help us get through this first round of the bracket. Press play! You can do it! It's all in the hips. Print your own bracket at Baconsale.com and play along at home!

Welcome to Baconsale 2.5! Based on your feedback and some wild ideas from Jacob, we've updated our Patreon account (patreon.com/Baconsale). You'll still get exclusive perks, like patron-only episodes, behind-the-scenes access and free merch, but we've added some new incentives and an entirely new tier! We're thankful for all of your support so far, patrons, and we look forward to continuing to grow our podcast with your support! Press play to hear all the details or visit www.patreon.com/Baconsale.

My name is Baconsale! And have we ever told you that you look just like Buddy Holly? Because today we're discussing one of greatest alternative albums ever made, the Blue Album by Weezer. And as we record in the garage, we're going to discuss each song as the music is playing. It's an idea that has been only in dreams until now. Plus, (say it ain't so!) we're going to rank each track on Weezer's debut self-titled album. If you want to support our podcast, hear our words as we talk away (so please press play).

Who needs a host? This year's Academy Awards may have been the most disappointing yet for film-lovers, but those who won our Oscar predictions contest are definitely going to be happy with the results. Congratulations! Also, we reveal which member of Baconsale owes the others a pizza, as well as what happens to Jacob's score when we keep him from cheating. Press play to hear how green our book is!

This year's Academy Awards were kind of disappointing, weren't they? Well, Baconsale has your back. We've created our own Bacademy Podwards™ to honor those films of 2018 that were truly deserving of praise. We've come up with our own nominees and even some new categories and we're ready to present them to you just like the Oscars, except much shorter and with less politics. We do have an In Memoriam section, though. Press play to hear who is going to bring home the Bacon™ this year!

Baconsale is doing things a little differently this time. We're doing our Oscar predictions show as a BaconBit. A really long BaconBit…. We're selecting winners for each category of the 91st Academy Awards—which is heavily influenced by the BAFTAs, according to Joel. This time we made Jacob choose first so he couldn't cheat. And with pizza delivery on the line, the stakes have never been higher. Plus, we're doing a GIVEAWAY this episode! Submit your Oscar predictions on our official ballot, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter and at Baconsale.com before 4 p.m. MST on Sunday, February 24, 2019 for a chance to win a fabulous film-related prize! Press play to hear Jacob try and pronounce the names of each nominee!

That awkward moment when Baconsale does another etiquette show. 85% of people aren't brave enough to read this episode blurb, but for those who do, you'll find out that today Kent, Joel and Jacob are going to break the internet as they lay out some ground rules for Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. We'll take on such topics as posting frequency, fake profiles, taking pictures of food, trolls, vaguebooking and more. Plus, we're sharing social media pet peeves that we got from you, the listener! Hit play and share this post, because Bill Gates has promised to divide his fortune with everyone that does.

Once upon a time there was light in our lives, and that time was last February when Baconsale talked about love songs, so we decided to once again discuss romantic tunes that are always on our mind. Say "Hello" to Kent, Joel and Jacob's picks for such categories as Best Bitter Song, Reminds You of a Childhood Crush, Strangest Lyrics and Best Love Song from a Musical. And if we don't choose your song, let us un-break your heart as we introduce you to some new ones. All I ask of you is to press play and have a wonderful tonight! Go to Baconsale.com to find the Spotify playlist of all the songs we talked about on this episode.

We've switched things up in this episode of Baconsale and let Kent & Jacob take on the main discussion while Joel is the moderator. Why? Because we're giving an **EXXXXTREME HIZZTORY LESSON** on the PlayStation console and modern gaming. And as we offer fun facts, game suggestions and quiz questions, we'll try to keep it interesting for gamers and non-gamers alike. PS, we want you to press play!

*sniff* We promised ourselves we wouldn’t do this! *sniff* Today on Baconsale we're discussing films from our past and present that made us get emotional. To no one's surprise, Joel basically cries at everything (including talking about sad movie moments) and Kent barely cries at anything, but we even get some insight as to what makes Jacob cry. Join us as we open up, wear our hearts on our sleeves and show off our sensitive sides. *sob* Grab a box of tissues and press play!

FACT: This is an episode of Baconsale. FACT: Kent and Joel will offer predictions for the upcoming year, such as which celebrity couples will break up, which fashion trends will make a comeback and which films will flop in 2019. FACT: Due to his illness, Jacob will repeatedly try to fact-check Kent and Joel's facts, only to find that their facts are, in fact, facts. FACT: Some of our facts are merely strongly worded opinions. FACT: You should press play and listen to this episode of Baconsale.

It all comes down to this. After years in the dog house, M. Night Shyamalan is finishing his unique trilogy with an unusual movie that could make or break his comeback streak. But will Glass live up to the hype? Jacob hasn't seen it yet, so we sent him to an institution that will take good care of him, but Kent, Joel, Patricia, Dennis and The Beast are here to discuss a sequel that has been in the making for 19 years. And if you're feeling a little fragile, don't worry, the first part of our Glass review is spoiler-free. I mean, we may spoil Unbreakable and Split a little in our opening discussion, but we'll warn you before we start spoiling Glass.

Season five is alive! And Baconsale is back to tell you about the best & worst movies that we watched last season. As per usual, Kent only chooses movies that were released in 2018, Joel picks films that he watched for the first time last year, and Jacob agrees with whatever Kent says. 2018 wasn't a great year for cinema, but we're here to inform you about the hidden gems and help you avoid the landmines. Press play to hear how to correctly pronounce "Gotti"!

Surprise! Yes, we know we already did our season finale of Baconsale, and yes, we're all trapped in rubble after the cave-in, but we couldn't let the year pass without talking about Jason Momoa's abs -er, I mean Aquaman! After all, this film is a culmination of Joel's challenge to Kent back in February during our "Too Many Spoilers" BaconBit. It's also a chance to see if Kent will maintain his DC bias, even though they're becoming more Marvel-like with each movie. And just in case you haven't seen the film yet, don't worry, the first 21 minutes are spoiler-free! Press play to hear what we think about Glub, Glub, Punch, Punch!

As season four of Baconsale draws to a close, we're taking a look back at all we did this year. We're giving out finger boops like candy as we discuss our favorite moments (Mom show!), the best episode art (did someone say teleportation fumes?), our biggest regrets (veggie burgers), how many babies were born (SPOILER ALERT: Kent is pregnant), behind-the-scenes stories (binge-watching Hitchcock) and goals for the next season (sibling show?). And as we wrap up another season of this podcast, you can rest assured that everything will end normally and nothing crazy will happen, right? Press play to hear our final episode of 2018!

Baconsale is counting down to Christmas with an episode dedicated to Hallmark original films and other made-for-TV holiday rom-coms. Kent, Joel and Jacob left the big city and traveled to a quaint town where we watched some of your suggestions and we're now ready to review them. And after a musical montage where we decorate a tree and go ice skating, we take a Hallmark channel quiz and guess storylines based only on the title. Look! It's snowing! Tell your quirky best friend it's time to press play!

'Twas the first Baconsale of this Christmas season. And Kent, Joel and Jacob will soon commit treason. For they have decided to rank and to tier The holiday movies you watch every year. From stop-motion Rudolph in the year '64 To CGI remakes of films done before. We hope you enjoy this judgmental journey But if you're enraged, please don't call your attorney. Press play to see where we place your Christmas favorites!

Jacob has been talking to Baconsale about The Last Kingdom (Kingdom of Heaven?) for some time now in private, and we finally agreed to let him talk about The Last Kingdom (Fallen Kingdom?) on this BaconBit. He has watched the whole thing on Netflix and he's excited to pitch it to you, the listener. So excited, in fact, that he's willing to let Kent and Joel eat candy while on the air so they will shut up and let him speak. Press play to see if your interest will be piqued by The Last Kingdom (Kingdom Hearts?).

Don't Worry, Be Happy, because Baconsale is finally going to Whip It and finish our 80s one-hit wonder tournament! At times We're Walking on Sunshine when we agree, but other choices will make Joel call Kent a Maniac. Nevertheless, we put our Heart and Soul into this Funkytown of new wave, pop and rock music from 1980s and The Promise is we'll declare an ultimate winner and finally end this NeverEnding Story. Come On Eileen, don't be Too Shy. Press play! Print the advanced 80s bracket at Baconsale.com.

Hey fellas! Since we did a Man Crush show earlier this year, we felt it was only fair to give the ladies equal time. So, on this episode Baconsale, we're going to talk about our favorite females. We also brought back Lindsay, a real-live woman, onto the show to keep us in check and make sure we don't cross any lines, such as Kent saying one of his picks has a "broken rodent face." Listen as we crown such categories as Girl Next Door, Classically Beautiful, Best Smile, Most Attractive Musician and Hottest Hero. Press play to hear us try our best to not have Kate Beckinsale win almost every single category.

Join Kent, Joel and Jacob as we talk about Newt, Tina, other Jacob, Queenie, Credence, Leta, Theseus, Nagini, Yusuf, Abernathy, McGonagall, Bunty, Dumbledore, Grindelwald and every other character and storyline they crammed into this sequel to the spin-off of the Harry Potter franchise. Joel didn't feel the last Fantastic Beasts movie deserved to be part of the Wizarding World, but will this one change his mind? And were Kent and Jacob able to stay awake during the screening? Press play to hear our review of this movie. The first 13 minutes are spoiler free!

Ohhhhh yeeeeeah! Believe It or Not, Baconsale is Puttin' on the Ritz and doing an 80s one-hit wonder tournament. We've created a bracket of new wave, rock and pop tunes that'll make you want to Party All the Time, even if you don't remember who the artist is. It Takes Two votes to make a song Breakout to the next round. The tournaments may be our Obsession, but we're only advancing one round on this episode. We'll take a Buffalo Stance and declare an ultimate winner next time. Relax. All I Need is for you to press play! Print your own 80s one-hit wonder bracket and find our Spotify playlist at Baconsale.com.

Casey Smith had an idea. He wanted to know if Kent and Joel could guess what movie he was thinking of through a simple game of 20 questions, so we invited him to join us on this episode to give it a shot. What we found out is that Jacob likes to pick obscure movies, Joel doesn't have a good poker face and Kent is fiercely competitive when his film cred is on the line. Press play to see if our patron can stump Baconsale!

We couldn't let this Halloween season pass without discussing one of the most talked about Netflix series of the year, The Haunting of Hill House. If you haven't heard about it, all you need to know is that it stars Carla Gugino and that kid from E.T., and apparently it's so scary that it makes people pass out. Kent, Joel and Jacob watched it, regained consciousness and now they're ready to talk about what they thought about this ghostly family drama. And if you haven't seen it, don't worry, the first 16 minutes are spoiler free. Don't look now, but The Bent-Neck Lady is standing right behind you and she wants you to press play.

As we're wrapping up the Halloween season, Baconsale decided to take a journey into one of the most disturbing places of all: Jacob's mind. Jacob has written another Choose-Your-Own-Adventure-style game and is placing Joel and Kent in the middle of the horrifying action. Listen as they make dangerous decisions with each roll of the die and battle iconic movie monsters and a demented fast food mascot in a parallel reality. My dear demon, be my listener now, I plead. Press play!

As soon as Burger King announced their Nightmare King—a green hamburger that is reported to cause bad dreams—we knew we had to try it. We also threw in the Frozen Fanta Scary Black Cherry slushie, just for good measure. But will these creepy fast food concoctions invade our peaceful slumber? Or is the only scary thing how many calories they have in them? Press play to hear everything (and we mean everything) about what happened after we ate this Halloween-themed burger.

WARNING! If this episode gets out of hand, it's not our fault. We asked you, the listener, to send in horror movie pitches and the results were…interesting. We got everything from horrifying tales of skinwalkers to strange stories about singing CPR dummies. And after reading (and sometimes mocking) each pitch, Kent, Joel and Jacob are going to decide if the project gets green-lit or not. Press play to join us in your descent into madness!

It was a dark and stormy night in the Baconcave, so we decided to share some of our favorite selections from Alvin Schwartz's notorious children's book series, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Kent and Joel take turns reading such classic tales as "The Hook," "The Babysitter," "The Haunted House" and "The Ghost with the Bloody Fingers," all while trying their best to not be freaked out by Stephen Gammell's horrific illustrations and Jacob's indifferent attitude. Dim the lights, gather 'round the campfire, and press play to enjoy some fantastically freaky Halloween folklore!

5….4….3....2….1….Blast off! Kent and Joel saw First Man, the Neil Armstrong biopic, and they're ready to let you know what they think about it. Will Ryan Gosling's good looks and Damien Chazelle's directing win Kent over? Does Joel feel like the film is unpatriotic? Can there be any spoilers for a historically-based movie about the first man to walk on the moon? Press play and find out! And, for some reason, the first part is spoiler-free.

Don't be frightened, children of the night. Ve vant to tell you about vampires! Baconsale has done a lot of research about blood-sucking demons, and we're bringing a lot of new facts and folklore into the light of day. We'll discuss what causes vampirism, how to tell if you're a vampire, and how to kill undead coffin-dwellers. We're also ready to share with you our Baconsale-approved vampire movies, including everything from Nosferatu to Dracula Untold. Babe! I need you to press play on our latest Halloween episode!

The world has enough superheroes and not enough podcasters critiquing superhero movies. In this BaconBit, Baconsale is ready to review Venom, starring Logan Marshall-Green- uh, we mean, Tom Hardy. But will this movie be dark enough for Kent, even though it's not rated R? And will Joel be satisfied with a Venom movie that doesn't have Spider-Man in it? As always, the first part of our review is spoiler-free. We are Baconsale. Press play before we bite your head off!

Good evening. And welcome to another episode of Baconsale Presents. Tonight, we are here to present to you horrific tales of Sabotage, mistaken identity and Murder! from one of the most Notorious filmmakers of our time, Alfred Hitchcock. I Confess that Kent and Joel went a little Psycho and watched all 53 of the iconic director's films, and they're now ready to give their recommendations, along with some Suspicious history about the Master of Suspense. Without a Shadow of a Doubt, you should get over your Stage Fright and press play!

INITIATING EPISODE BOOT SEQUENCE… GUEST PARAMETERS ESTABLISHED… CATEGORY ALLOCATION IN PROCESS… h3ll0, hum4n5. On this episode of Baconsale, we're talking about our favorite robots, cyborgs, androids and all forms of fictional artificial intelligence from movies & television. This category show came from the CPU of Ryan Ferrin, who is also our guest on this show. Interface with us as we select picks for such categories as best in a fight, most impressive A.I., mech suit we'd like to wear, and most likely to take over the earth. Press play to launch episode.

From the lakes of Minnesota, to the hills of Tennessee, across the plains of Texas, from sea to shining sea, there's a film set in every American state, and it's time for Baconsale to say which one is the best representation of the land and the people it comes from. And just to make sure we don't get lost on this road trip, we're only giving ourselves one minute per debate. After all, we have 50 of these states to get through. Press play to hear what is declared as the official movie is for your state! Visit Baconsale.com to download a large, high-resolution version of our official state map.

Snap! Crackle! Pop! Baconsale is diving back into the bowl to rank "non-sugary" cereals—the type that you could actually convince your mother to buy when you were a kid. And as we tier each high-fiber, all-natural, whole-grain part of a balanced breakfast, we'll offer you two scoops full of interesting facts, such as the real reason Corn Flakes were created, what shape Cheerios are, the dark past of Wheat Chex, and who was crazy enough to invent Grape Nuts. Press play to find out why this podcast is kid tested, mother approved!

After a mediocre cinematic summer, Baconsale is looking to the movies of this September, October, November and December to save 2018. However, in a bizarre reversal of roles, Kent ends up picking mainstream sequels to reboots of spin-offs while Joel chooses the hipster films. Join us as we go deeper than Aquaman to let you know what's coming to theaters near you this year. Press play to hear what we want to see and what we want to bomb!

Hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, menu quests they don't upset us! Well, maybe they do. Because now that we've eaten every single item on the Burger King menu, we've got a few things to say about the fast food monarch. We'll discuss random restaurant franchise facts in this Whopper of an episode, and then we'll pick winners & losers for such categories as best breakfast, guilty pleasure, biggest surprise and worst value menu item. We don’t always agree, but that just makes things more interesting. Don't be a subservient chicken, press play and have it your way!

On this episode, Baconsale takes on one of the most controversial topics it has ever done: parenting. We've brought our good friend Abe Yospe back to share his award-winning parental tweets and offer some advice to the new father, Jacob. Along the way we'll tell funny stories about our kids and talk about what it's like being a dad. Plus, Joel finally makes good on our promise to our first patrons to immortalize them in song. Are you interested? Hi, interested. I'm dad! Now press play!

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences recently announced the creation of a new category to honor Black Panther—uh, we mean to honor “achievement in popular film.” However, this popularity contest at the Academy Awards is not sitting well with Baconsale, so Kent, Joel and Jacob have decided to rant about it. But it's not all doom and gloom. We also offer up some potential solutions for the Oscars, as their TV ratings tumble and they flounder around for a fix. Press play to hear a bunch of film snobs complain about a bunch of film snobs.

What’s up, guys? Today Baconsale is gonna be talking about YouTube, and how it’s more than just a platform for sharing funny cat videos. In fact, some people watch YouTube channels more than regular TV channels these days, and some YouTubers make a darn good living creating original content for the site. Kent and Joel are each ready to share a list of five channels they subscribe to in order to get you started on the path of ultimate “internetainment.” Like, comment, subscribe and press play!

To survive a war, you gotta become war, and Baconsale is finishing our battle of action heroes with some of the toughest characters around—some of whom could be registered as lethal weapons. And this bracket features some epic match-ups such as John McClane vs. Luke Hobbs, Paul Kersey vs. Ellen Ripley, and James Bond vs. Ethan Hunt. In the end, we will declare who is the toughest of them all. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to press play. And you can print your own advanced action hero bracket at Baconsale.com.

We're making this game into a trilogy! It's time for another round of America's least-known, but most-popular game: Cable, IMAX, Erase. With each set of three movies (or film franchises), Kent and Joel must decide which one they'll watch once in theaters, which one they'll watch repeatedly at home, and which one they'll erase from existence. This episode features such match-ups as Superman/Batman/Spider-Man and The Emoji Movie/Boss Baby/Trolls. Press play to hear these guys feel more pain than they probably should with hypothetical scenarios.

Do you feel lucky, punk? Well, for action movie heroes, it's a good day to die hard because Baconsale is doing a fast and furious tournament to see which fictional character's particular set of skills will keep him or her from being terminated. This episode features such epic match-ups as Indiana Jones vs. Lara Croft, Rambo vs. Riddick and John Wick vs. Hit-Girl. Press play and stick around to hear us start off this epic action hero bracket! Play along by printing off your own bracket at Baconsale.com.

Welcome to Baconsale 2.0! We've launched our Patreon account (patreon.com/Baconsale) so you can become an official supporter of our podcast. Plus, you'll get a bunch of exclusive perks, like patron-only episodes, behind-the-scenes access and Baconsale merch! Press play to hear all about the different tiers of donations you can give to help keep the lights on here in the Baconcave. Visit www.patreon.com/Baconsale for even more details.

Today on Baconsale we're talking film trilogies, and we'll be breaking the episode into three distinct sections: Part 1 - Movies that didn't really need a sequel, but somehow became a trilogy. Part 2 - Sequels that were better than the original film. Part 3 - Third movies in a trilogy that killed the franchise—at least for a while. Kent and Joel have agreed on a trio of choices for each section and are ready to debate, discuss and share random facts about their picks in triplicate. Count to three and press play. It's time for Baconsale!

Hey girl, we know you like it when Kent, Joel and Jacob are a little uncomfortable, which is why Baconsale is dedicating an entire episode to man crushes. Why? We're not sure. It was Kent's idea. But it was also Kent's idea to invite Lindsay, our special guest, onto the show. She's here to add some female perspective and to pick winners for categories such as Classically Handsome, Best Chris, Hottest Athlete, Silver Fox, Best Smile, Guy Next Door and Sexiest "Sexiest Man Alive." So grab some cocoa butter, oil up those abs and press play to hear us discuss dapper dudes.

Now that the dust has settled from Avengers: Infinity War, it's time for Baconsale to talk about Marvel's next installment: Ant-Man and the Wasp. Last time Ant-Man was on the big screen, it wasn't exactly beloved by Kent, Joel and Jacob, but will this sequel (and Paul Rudd's charm) win them over? Even if you haven't seen the movie yet, you can still listen to the first eight minutes—they're spoiler free. Grow up (or shrink down) and press play! It's time to enter the quantum realm of movie reviews!

Ever heard the phrase "the inmates are running the asylum"? Well, that's what we're doing on this episode of Baconsale. We've handed over the reins to you, the listener, and we're answering questions that you submitted. This means we'll be talking about conspiracy theories, our favorite books, which Muppet we'd be, switching bodies with each other, memes, a potential mascot for the podcast, Godzilla vs. King Kong, our most embarrassing moments on the show and so much more. Press play to hear us bare our souls on this random and self-indulgent episode!

Imagine that they're going to build a national monument to the biggest summer blockbusters of all time—which four films do you think should be represented? Baconsale is ready to debate this issue and come to a consensus on which fictional characters should literally (and yet figuratively) be set in stone. And, as an added bonus, Kent, Joel and Jacob are each going to sculpt personal monuments in the mountains behind their homes of four other summer movies that mean something special to them. Grab your chisels & hammers and press play, because it's time to chip away at another outlandish topic on Baconsale!