All Things Marriage with Dr. Chavonne

Making time for your marriage can sometimes feel like a sacrifice. There are many competing demands for your time and energy. But when you don’t treat your marriage as a priority, you and your spouse struggle to connect. And connection is what makes a marriage work. In this episode: you’ll learn how to use a simple framework to think about the time you invest in your marriage you will determine if your motivation for how you spend your time outside of your marriage is coming from the right place or not you will shift the way you think about making time for your marriage from looking at what you lose to focusing on all that you gain you will understand the connection between making time for your marriage now and saving yourself time later I also share a real-life example of how I recently applied this in my own marriage. Making time for your marriage is an investment that always pays off. You’ll be more comfortable around each other, have better communication, and ultimately get along better. Join me on the podcast today for a valuable conversation about the importance of making time for your marriage.

Anytime a couple is not on the same page one person is likely to feel very disappointed or frustrated. Many people come to me asking the question of how to get their spouse on board with something. In this episode, I give you my honest answer and introduce you to a 5-step process for having these types of conversations. I make the distinction between inviting your partner to consider something versus trying to convince them. In this episode you will learn: -the right way to start an important conversation -what energy do you need to bring to best engage your spouse -how to make the invitation irresistible to your spouse -how to get their buy-in without dragging them along AND… I also share a SPECIAL invitation for you to join me at my Virtual Couples Event: Better Together. This event will be held from Friday, October 22 2021 to Saturday, October 23, 2021. Friday will be a virtual date night in and Saturday is an in-depth virtual workshop where you will be given the tools you need to create a marriage you love. To register and get additional details visit https://drchavonne.com/better-together-couples-event/

I know for many when you got married, you really didn't have many doubts. You felt like this was a great match that you were thrilled to be committing your life to spend together and you know, things happen. And maybe you're hoping to be back in that place again. I want you to know that no matter where you guys may find yourself right now. That connection, that enjoyment, that fun, that love, that passion, that excitement is still there. There may be things standing in your way right now. But all of those things can be removed. You can learn to love your marriage again and I want to help you with the “again part” of loving your marriage again. Tune in to learn more. If you are at a place where you're ready to get some help with your marriage and work directly with a coach that gets exactly what you're going through, that knows the exact plan and process to get you to a better place. Then here I am for you. You can visit www.drchavonne.com to schedule a call with me directly.

Do you feel like you and your spouse are living like roommates? Whenever you hear about a roommate, it's usually a story of something that's not working well. You may currently be experiencing a rough patch in your marriage that’s making you feel this way but here’s the thing, you are roommates. You live in a home together, you share responsibilities, you do your thing, in some ways and your spouse does their thing in certain ways. So in actuality you are roommates, it is a part of being married. I want to offer you the insight that roommate living is more of a mindset rather than an actual circumstance. A couple can spend very little time together and not feel like roommates. And a couple could spend a lot of time together and still feel like roommates because this roommate mentality is a mindset. The good news is that this is just a season in your marriage and it can change. Listen in as I share a few things that you can do and how to navigate this season in your marriage. if you and your spouse are both interested in addressing how disconnection is a problem in your marriage. I am here to support you. Together, we will talk about what's been happening, what you want for your marriage and how to permanently move you out of the roommate living situation. Book your call now at www.drchavonne.com.

For many women, there's an emotional reactivity and a heightened sense of fear and anxiety that's often at play when it comes to parenting our children. It's like you reflect back on your own childhood and find yourself being in the space of not wanting to make the same mistakes with your children that you perceive that your parents made. This can result in having parenting differences in your marriage since you may not always be a united front in all of your parenting scenarios. This can be very frustrating but I want you to know that this is a very common topic that I coach on and it can get better. So what I'm going to share with you today are several perspectives and tips and strategies that you can employ when you find yourself growing more and more frustrated by parenting differences with your spouse. I also want to offer that even though this topic is specific to parenting, you can apply these principles I'm going to share to any significant difference between you and your spouse. If you are really struggling with some of the differences between you and your spouse, coaching can really help you. We can work together one on one and do a deep dive into, we can look at every aspect of your marriage, where it feels like you and your spouse are not on the same page, we can find how to think about it differently, how to feel differently about it, and how to approach the situations in ways that are really just going to be much more effective than maybe what you've been doing so far. If you're ready to do this work I want to invite you to a private call with me, it is a complimentary consultation, and you can book your call today at www.drchavonne.com.

Shutting down in a marriage may look like a lot of different things. You may find your spouse is more distant, withdrawn, distracted, or defensive. This can be a difficult time, especially if you deeply want to connect and work on things together. In this episode I share the reasons why your spouse may have shut down, and how you can still move yourself forward in a positive direction. I also share three critical things to keep in mind so that you remain encouraged and believe in a better future together. You CAN have a marriage that you love, a marriage that your spouse loves and a marriage that you both are very proud of. Press play to learn more.

What does it mean to hold space for someone else? It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. For your spouse, this means the same thing. If we aren't as happy as we can be in the marriage, it's likely because we see something in our spouse that we would like to be different. In this episode I offer you six steps that will help you hold the space and find peace with exactly where your spouse is. These steps will help you create a breakthrough for yourself and actually start feeling the way that you want to be feeling. Listen in to learn more.

So often we are unclear about where we are and what is necessary to take us to where we want to be. Knowing where you are right now in your marriage is such valuable information because it helps you know where to put your focus and effort. As a coach, my goal is all about getting you from where you are now, to where you want to be and help you to get super clear about the starting line. How you approach getting the results that you want will be different depending on where you're starting from but ultimately all we really want is to fully express ourselves, to be accepted and loved and feel connected to life, to other people, to ourselves. And so if that's what we're all after, at the end of the day, there's tons of different ways we can create that. And there are tons of different starting points. Today I want to share with you the three places that I find most people start out from and how the work of marriage coaching, the work of life coaching applies, and is beneficial to these scenarios. And as long as you are open to coaching, you are really committed to doing the work and getting the outcome that you want, I can help you. If you would like to work together, I encourage you to go to my website at www.drchavonnne.com and schedule a complimentary call with me. I will be really clear with you about where you are and we will map out your exact pathway to getting to where you want to be.

Today’s episode will help you to be intentional about the marriage you want and deserve. If you want a great marriage, it won’t happen by chance. Great marriages happen by choice. When it comes to #marriagegoals, I want you to look at what you have now and build from there rather than focusing on the future idealistic version of the marriage that you want. Making what we have now be enough to work with in creating the marriage of your dreams is the best place to start. The next step is looking internally to identify what needs to shift inside of you to make your marriage better. These are the things that you have 100% control over and these are the things that can make your marriage 100% better. Listen in to learn more about setting marriage goals from an internal place. If you are ready to have a better marriage, I invite you to work with me in accomplishing your marriage goals. I can help you get clear on your goals, what's standing in your way and your exact roadmap so that you can get unstuck and transform your marriage into a loving and enjoyable experience. Go to www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

It's a celebration guys! This is our 100th podcast episode! I am so proud. Thank you all for your continued support. I appreciate you listening to the podcast and taking the time to leave a comment and a review. Thank you. So to celebrate, I thought it would be fun to share with you a few books from some of the experts in the marriage space that have really shaped my thinking and enhanced my marriage and my coaching business. Listen in as I discuss my faves and how these books and ideas can help you. And if you decide to read any of them, I'd love to know your thoughts, so let me know about it by leaving me a comment! If you are looking for more guidance and 1-on-1 support, I invite you to reach out to me by scheduling your complimentary call to see if working together is the right next step. Go to https://drchavonne.com/ to book a call.

We all have expectations of how we want things to be in our life and our marriage is no exception. And so when our husband is not exactly how we would want him to be, we feel disappointed. I want to offer to you that loving your marriage is a mindset that is not dependent on the circumstance being perfect. There are certain foundational items that are important to the success of your marriage. By removing the expectation for things that are non-essentials you will be able to focus more on the essentials. Listen in as I share some of the foundational ingredients for a marriage to be healthy and why these basics are crucial if a marriage is going to flourish. These are the seven ingredients to loving your marriage again. If you would like help to really manage your mind about the situations and circumstances of your marriage right now, I want to invite you to reach out to me. I offer a complimentary consultation call where you and I will speak directly and have a two-way conversation where I will hear everything that is happening in your marriage and then share the exact pathway forward by providing a systematic roadmap of the things YOU need to do to reach a place of contentment. You can go to, www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

We sell ourselves on things every day. Whether it’s the thing we don’t need at Target or a new habit we want to adopt, we come up with reasons to say yes. Today I want to challenge you to sell yourself on a better marriage. This involves focusing on what you want MOST which then leads you to take action in the right direction. The more time you spend thinking about the marriage you want, the more motivated you become. Listen in as I share a process for selling yourself on a better marriage so that you can more easily create it in your life starting today. And if you’re ready for private coaching with me, visit my website drchavonne.com and schedule a complimentary call. Over the next 6 months, you can have my help walking you through all of the shifts necessary to create a marriage you love again.

Sharing your life with another person can be a challenge. Marriages take work and some of this work is work that you have to do on your own. Our guest today, Dr. M., will share her success story of how she improved not only her marriage but your emotional well-being after deciding to work with me via private coaching. You will hear how she has gained the clarity that she needed to move from where she was in her marriage to where she wanted to be. There is a lot of valuable information in this conversation that you can implement in your own marriage. By gaining control of your thoughts you can THINK yourself to a GREAT marriage. Tune in to learn more. If you are ready to improve your marriage and want my help and guidance, go to , www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

How self-aware are you? Self-awareness is probably one of those things where you have an idea of what it is, but if someone asked you to define it, you might stumble a bit to find the words. By definition, self-awareness is a conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires. Being self-aware is how you live as your true, authentic self. When we know ourselves deeply, we are able to live more fulfilled and happier lives. In today’s episode, I will share with you the power of self-awareness as it relates to marriage. When you and how you can access your innermost thoughts and your real feelings and clearly understand what's happening for you, the way you interact with your husband will be different. You’ll also be able to make the powerful connection between how you are showing up in the marriage and the impact of that in relation to your desired results. I’m sharing four specific and amazing things that self-awareness offers to you that you can use to transform your marriage. Tune in to learn more. If you are ready to master self awareness to create a marriage that you love, private coaching with me is the next step. I invite you to visit my website at drchavonne.com to schedule a complimentary call. During that conversation, I’ll hear more about what’s going on, and show you the very specific ways coaching will help you make the shifts to have a better marriage.

It's not easy to see your husband's imperfections and then choose to allow him to be who he is without you complaining or trying to fix him. But exercising allowance makes your marriage more peaceful and enjoyable. Allowance is you suspending your thoughts and beliefs of who you think your husband should be according to your opinion. This does not mean that you don’t ever stand up for yourself. You should create boundaries in order to protect yourself, your values and what's important to you but you should not use boundaries to manipulate or control what your husband is doing. Boundaries are not ultimatums. Listen in to learn how you can allow your husband to be who he is, just the way he is and still set boundaries to protect your values and ultimately have a better marriage. If you want to create an easier marriage and stop feeling so frustrated with your husband, I invite you to private coaching with me. Over the course of 6 months you will learn how to master the mindset that will help you love being married again. To schedule a complimentary call with me by visiting my website at www.drchavonne.com. This is the pathway to creating different results in your marriage and I can 100% help you with that.

Throughout your marriage, there will be times when you need to have "must-have" conversations to work out some issues. Other times you may just need to manage those perceived issues differently in your mind. If you find yourself often struggling to have productive conversations it could be a sign that the approach to those must-have conversations needs a revision. Today, I will share five reasons why talking about your issues in marriage doesn’t always work. Listen in to gain some clarity on how to view the issues differently to then move in a more productive conversation. If you are looking for help to improve your marriage and are ready to make more progress than you have ever made before, I invite you to consider private coaching with me. To explore if this is the right next step for you, schedule a complimentary call with me by visiting my website at www.drchavonne.com.

Improving your marriage can be very hard and confusing when you don’t have a step by step plan. There are stages when going from a relationship where you don’t get along, to one where you are passionately in love again. In this episode I’m sharing the 5 phases of making your marriage work. As you listen, think about which stage you are in and what needs to happen to move you to the next stage. Understanding the natural progression to making your marriage better will give you a goal mark to reach for and builds your hope in your ability to reach the final outcome you want. I also want you to know this is something I can help you with directly. I help my private clients get unstuck and transform unhappy marriages into loving and enjoyable marriages. I invite you to connect with me to discuss how my private coaching program can help you love your marriage again. Just go to www.drchavonne.com/work-with-me to schedule your complimentary call.