All Things Marriage with Dr. Chavonne

What do you WANT? Have you ever stopped and really answered that question when it comes to your marriage. Whenever I pose this to clients, they tell me what they DON'T want, which is a tale-tell sign they are focusing on what's negative. One of the greatest skills you can develop in the journey to make your marriage better is to focus on what you want. To keep the goal right in front of you always.In this podcast episode, I share with you exactly why you have a hard time articulating what you want, and provide you with some practical steps to help you start getting clear. If you want to take this work deeper, I invite you to work with me inside The Marriage UpGrade. Learn more at my website: DrChavonne.com

Have you ever considered that your marriage is a living, breathing entity that needs you and your spouse to care for it? This is a perspective I teach - where you start thinking about caring for your marriage just as you would a newborn baby. In this episode I break down the 5 areas you need to focus on - why each is so important to the health of your precious marriage, and the specific questions you need to start asking yourself.I also share more about The Marriage UpGrade and how you can get starting caring for your marriage in a much more intentional and elevated way. To learn more and to sign up for Cohort 2, visit this site: MarriageUpGrade.DrChavonne.com

Tune in to this episode where I introduce the concept of Spouse Sabotage. There are known and hidden ways you are thinking about your spouse that create the image of them being your enemy instead of someone you are on a team with. As a result of the way you think about them, you show up a certain way. Ultimately, this is the model or operating system that's creating your current results. The human brain will always find what's not working and the ways your spouse is letting you down. Today we will be breaking down all the ways that happens. I'll also be sharing 3 specific tools and strategies you can use to keep you OUT of this habit. If you'd like help and support managing your mind about your spouse so that your interactions can be better, I invite you to work with me directly and master this process. For more information you can visit my website: DrChavonne.com

In this training replay, I share with you my top 3 tips for addressing communication breakdowns, lack of connection, not being on the same page, and lack of physical intimacy.Get straight to the point, honest advice about what you and your spouse need to start doing differently in order to have a better marriage. Ready to join The Marriage UpGrade? Now is the time. The marriage you want is truly possible for you if you both put in the work to create it.I am here to support you in doing that with a process that works. Join us here: DrChavonne

What if you could guarantee the success of your marriage? What if the kind of changes you want to see were actually inevitable? I think they are, and inside this episode, I show you how and why.You'll learn the exact mindset necessary to create the successful and happy marriage you want. You'll learn how to actually measure progress in a way that motivates you to keep going. You'll understand the specific steps you need to take when things fall off track.If there was any episode that will help you and your spouse make progress in new ways, this is IT. Tune in now and get the perspective that will make all the difference.And if you want to guarantee your success inside of The Marriage UpGrade, I invite you to enroll today. This 6-month coaching program will give you the guidance, tools, and support you need to break through the areas where you are stuck and FINALLY solve your marriage issues for good.For details and to join, go here: DrChavonne.comEnrollment ends July 29th, 2022.

In this training replay, we are diving into the topic of what really creates change in your marriage. So many couples are trying to make their marriage better. They are having all the conversations. They are setting the plans and coming to new agreements. Only after a few weeks they find themselves right back to where they were before.In this episode, I teach you about the most important factor in creating long-term change in your marriage - your IDENTITY.The way you and your spouse are operating is a function of how you think about and see yourselves. So before any behavior changes can truly take root, we've got to aligns your identity to match.Tune in and learn this little known secret that really will create the shifts you want to see.If you LOVE this content and find that it's super helpful for what you are dealing with, join me inside The Marriage UpGrade. This is my 6-month coaching program that will help you improve your communication, connection, unity, and intimacy.For more information, go here: DrChavonne.comEnrollment ends July 29, 2022.

In this episode we are diving into the topic of Boundaries. In marriage, it's so important that you protect your relationship.There are external boundaries - things outside the marriage that can help or harm your progress,And things within the marriage - internal boundaries - that can help or harm your progress.You'll learn exactly what these are and how they show up in your marriage as well as what to do to create a stronger container for your marriage to thrive.If you find this information helpful and want to be part of a great environment for your marriage to thrive, I encourage you to join The Marriage UpGrade.You'll work on the thing within each of you that need to change for your marriage to grow, and be surrounded by a community of other couples who are likeminded and working on the same goals with you.To learn more and to enroll, please visit my website: DrChavonne.com and see the tab "The Marriage UpGrade."Enrollment is open until July 29th, 2022.

You are in for a treat over the next few episodes.In conjunction with the launch of my new coaching program, The Marriage UpGrade, I hosted a series of live trainings on the topics I know will be most valuable for you.I'm releasing those training recordings in BONUS episodes.Today, we are talking all about How to Get on The Same Page. This is a hot topic a lot of couples struggle with, and I know the perspective, mindset, and tools I offer in this training will help you and your spouse finally move forward in this area.If you find this information helpful and want to take this work deeper so you can apply it and change your marriage for good, I invite you to join me inside The Marriage UpGrade, which is currently open for enrollment, now until July 29th.Go to DrChavonne.com and click The Marriage UpGrade tab to learn more and to sign up today.

In this training replay you will learn all about the concept of The Finnish Line Mentality.This is literally one of the MOST important concepts I teach.Everything you create in life has to have a clear vision of what you want.You have to spend time focused on the goals you have for the FUTURE, more than the disappointments of your PAST.I dive deep into this concept because it is the difference maker for couples who create the kind of marriage they want, vs. couples who stay stuck in a marriage that feels disappointing.Having a finish line mentality will help you to overcome any argument, tension, distance, or frustration in your marriage. It's always guiding you as a North Star.This is something you will master inside The Marriage UpGrade, my new coaching program for couples.To learn more about this work, and how it can help you, visit my website: DrChavonne.comEnrollment is open until July 29, 2022.

Today we are talking about JOY and why it's so important to improving the experience you have in your marriage.The joy and happiness you feel is totally under your control. In this episode I break down the critical elements to consider as you make your own intentional plan for more joy in your life.You emotional wellness and well-being has a huge impact on how you interact with your spouse and how you see your marriage.The Joy Plan concept will give you an instant upgrade.And if you want to know more about working with me in my new group coaching program, definitely join me for THE LAUNCH PARTY. This is THE event for couples who want to improve their marriage in a powerful way that also incorporates more fun and joy.For details and to RSVP YES, go to: https://drchavonne.com/launchparty/See you there!

One thing most couples are not prepared for is how to navigate their differences, especially around topics that are very important to them.In this episode, I'll share why that is, how dating sometimes sets you up for having the wrong expectations, and most importantly, how to work through the differences that might feel very hard for you.In this episode, you'll learn:-how your negative beliefs about each other make working through your differences harder-how to normalize your differences and see that all couples experience many of the same things-how to identify the right problem to be solved and stop blaming each other-how to be more empowered in standing for the things that matter most to youTune in and be sure you are subscribed so you don't miss a thing.In this episode, I also share information about my upcoming Launch Party in honor of my new group coaching program. You can get the details and register to attend this exclusive event by going to my website: drchavonne.com/launchparty

The experience you have in your marriage is based on three perspectives and in today's podcast episode, I'll break down exactly what they are. There are a certain set of beliefs that most people have when it comes to these three "sides" of the triangle and they cause frustration, disappointment, and unhappiness. But when you are able to shift your perspective and find new ways of seeing things that serve you and the kind of marriage you want to create, everything changes. Perception really is reality. And today, I'll take you through how to start creating a new and better reality in your marriage by focusing on three specific types of thoughts.

Marriage is spiritual. I think it's something we all know, but don't always access the full range of resources available to us on a spiritual level to ensure our marriage thrive.In this episode we are diving into the spiritual side of things and discussing how many of the things we need to do in order to have healthy marriages defy our natural human tendencies. I share how tapping into the power available to us from God helps us overcome our own roadblocks to loving each other well.I offer specific ways to incorporate spirituality into your marriage so that you and your spouse improve the experience you have with each other. If you are ready to elevate how you show up, and the experience you have in your marriage, this episode is for you.

So many exciting updates on the podcast today. Be sure that you are plugged in to me at drchavonne.com or on IG @chavonneperotteOn this episode we are talking all about the purpose of marriage. How you define what marriage is about drives everything about how you show up.I offer a perspective on marriage that will massively inform your goals, how you see yourself and your spouse. The way you see the purpose of marriage also significantly influences how you experience happiness and fulfillment.Tune in now to get yourself grounded in your purpose driven marriage now.

We live in a world where it's not the norm to celebrate yourself. We worry about appearing "too much" or offending someone by doing big, amazing things for ourselves. But the degree to which you are able to love and celebrate yourself is the degree to which you can receive that from others.In this episode, I'm sharing more on the concept of celebrating yourself, why it's so important, and the impact it has on your marriage. I leave you with specific ways you can start incorporating this practice now.I recently celebrated my birthday in a big way and give you the inside scoop into what that experience was like for me.I also want to invite you to join me for a new Masterclass I'm hosting Sunday, April 3rd at 8pm EST. It's called Happy Again. It' all about tapping into your own personal happiness as a strategy for improving your marriage.Register for free here: https://drchavonne.com/happy-again/

In marriage, you will have communication breakdowns. They look differently for each couple, but it's not necessarily a sign that something is going horribly wrong.In this podcast episode, I break down the most common forms of communication breakdowns and share with you the reasons why they happen.I also provide you with a shift in perspective that will dramatically improve the way you handle and recover from communication breakdowns. You'll walk away with 3 specific things to think about in a new way so that you create more connection rather than distance in your marriage.And if you are looking for more help applying this work and are ready to have my help through private coaching, reach out and schedule an initial call with me. Visit drhavonne.com/work-with-me to book your appointment.

Today we are talking all about Fresh Starts! You can create a fresh start whenever you want. The only thing that's required is a desire for things to be different.In this episode I'm sharing with you my perspective on what it takes to create a fresh start in your marriage.And to walk out these steps in creating desired shifts in your own marriage, sign up for my new Fresh Start Challenge by going to drchavonne.com/fresh-start-2022.

I am excited to share with you a really fun, powerful, and eye-opening conversation that took place a few months ago at the Millennial Marriage Toolkit Summit hosted by fellow marriage coach Shivonne Davis. This was a deeply soul-stirring interview where we talked about God, marriage, and where I shared some life coaching tools along with Christian faith principles that you can use to improve your marriage and love each other well. In this episode we discuss:How to love WELLThe mindset of great communicationTwo things that kill communicationHow to walk through the discomfort of negative emotionsHow to get to a deep intimate space in your marriage Ready to sharpen your marriage so that it can get restored to its original intent? This conversation will definitely bring you some clarity on how to do that. Press play to learn more.

Are you loving this 3 part training on fight-free holiday? I had a wonderful time presenting this information to you and I know that you were able to gain some valuable insight that you can utilize to make this holiday season fight-free.If you've been following along, day one was all about how to avoid arguments in the first place. Day two, we talked about how to de-escalate arguments, when you're in the middle of a conversation that's going down a road you don't want it to and today we are wrapping up with a discussion about how to recover after a conversation goes wrong.I want to offer you that no one of those three things is better than the other. It's not necessarily better to avoid arguments or to prevent intense conversations from turning into arguments, or recovering. They're all equally valuable and important strategies to help you make your marriage better. And so in this episode, I will share with you five points as it relates to the mindset of recovering because there is a certain way that you have to think about tense moments or difficult conversations or arguments that will help you recover well. Specifically, you will learn to think of these experiences as…Just a moment in timeA learning opportunityA forward-moving journeyAn opportunity for a deeper connectionPress play now to learn more about how to actually recover after a conversation goes wrong.

Today we are continuing with Part 2 of our Fight-Free Holiday training and discussing how to de-escalate arguments. It’s impossible to never have a disagreement. That’s not even the goal.But when you do find your conversations veering off track, and you want to end on a good note, this episode will show you exactly what to do. De-escalating arguments requires a different skill set than avoiding arguments. That’s because there is actually a certain mindset that creates arguments in the first place.In this episode you will learn:the 4 thoughts that drive you to create argumentsspecific strategies to use so that you calm yourself down during a heated discussionhow to end on a good note, or pause the conversation and come back when you can both talk more calmly.There are a lot of gems in this episode, I encourage you to grab a pen and a notebook so you can jot down these nuggets and laser in on the one strategy that you will apply in your marriage.

This is my absolute favorite time of the year. The period between Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year is a time of major celebration for me and my family but I also recognize that while the holidays may be the most wonderful time of the year for some, that's not necessarily true when it comes to relationships.When you're already struggling in your marriage, it can be a challenging time during the holiday season where you have the gatherings and additional time together than you might during other parts of the year, which can create a lot more opportunities for conflict and issues. And so in honor of this time of year, I want to provide you with an amazing resource that I created that will help you get through the holidays, fight free. In this episode, we are going to discuss avoiding arguments in the first place. I'm sure all of us would like to have many fewer arguments or difficult conversations that don't end well. Specifically, you’ll learn:How emotionally reactive are you, scale of one to 10How to value your partner's perspective as much as your ownHow to look at the positive in your communication with your spouse Consider that there are multiple solutions that take both of you to figure out How to tolerate negative emotions and not use them as an act of war I encourage you to grab a pen and a notebook so you can jot down these nuggets and laser in on what is most applicable and relevant for you.

In general, a trigger is anything including memories, experiences, or events that sparks an intense emotional reaction, regardless of your current mood. On any given day, you probably experience a range of emotions such as excitement, unease, frustration, joy, disappointment. Your response to these events can vary based on your frame of mind and the circumstances surrounding the situation.In marriage, a trigger is defined as an intense reaction to anything your spouse says or does. These triggers are usually there to teach us something, however, we don't pause to learn what the trigger is teaching us. Instead, it usually leads to us overreacting and arguments. That's why knowing what your triggers are and how to deal with them at the moment is important. In this episode of the podcast, I share five steps you can use to handle your triggers at the moment and avoid tension in your marriage.

One of the greatest human needs is to connect. To be seen, heard, and known by a person you care about deeply. When couples can’t connect, they experience communication breakdowns, unnecessary arguments, they don’t operate as a team, and they feel lonely. However, men and women are wired to connect differently, and these differences are often misunderstood. Knowing and accepting these differences helps you to work with them instead of against them.In this episode of the podcast, I share the steps to creating the kind of connection you want in your marriage. Specifically, you’ll learn:the most important step in creating a deeper, more vulnerable connectionwhy it feels hard to connect with your spouse in ways you prefer what you may be missing in your current level of connectionwhy starting small will create massive breakthroughs the one habit you may have that’s making connecting with each other harder If you’ve been struggling to connect and feel like your marriage operates on a surface level, this episode will really help you make progress.

Being married is the bringing together of two completely different people with two completely different ways of thinking, being, and operating in the world. There will be times when you don’t understand or agree with your spouse. In those moments, it is human nature to judge the other person as wrong. But judging each other only leads to conflict, tension, and distance - the exact things you DON’T want in your marriage.In this podcast episode, we are tackling the topic of judgment. Here’s what you will learn:what your exact judgment cycle looks like and the dance you and your partner are unconsciously doing with each otherthe reasons behind your judgment of each other, and why you fall into the habit of judging each otherthe specific ways judgment creeps in your marriage and creates a more undesirable experience for you boththe 5 most important personal shifts you each need to make in order to lessen the impact of judgmental tendencies. This is the topic everyone is thinking about wanting help with and that help is finally here. Tune in now to address judgment in your marriage, and move into greater acceptance, understanding, and love for each other.

When it comes to relationships, we don't think of ourselves as being in need of skills, especially in marriage, because what brings us together most times is this natural organic connection for each other. It's not something we're even consciously working to create, it's just there. But it does take a certain set of skills to maintain the kind of marriage you want. You must be constantly aware of developing, cultivating, mastering specific skills to create the experience that you want together. And so that's what we're going to be talking about today. In this episode, I’m sharing the 5 most essential skills you need in order for your marriage to thrive. In addition, you will learnthe difference between skills you develop vs. traits you inherently havethe mindset required to build your own skills in your relationshiphow you’ll know when you’ve mastered the marriage skills As you listen to this episode, I want you to keep in mind, what is the marriage that you want? What is the relationship with each other that you would like to have? How do you want to be feeling? How do you want to be thinking about each other and treating each other and interacting with each other? Because whatever you want, if you're not currently experiencing it, there is a gap. And that gap includes a gap in skills. Press play to learn what these skills are, why they are important and how to cultivate them so that you can thoroughly enjoy your marriage.Mentioned in this Episode: Better Together Couple’s Event: https://drchavonne.com/better-together-couples-event/

If you are interested in changing your life for the better, speaking with someone who is a professional in helping others meet the outcomes that will bring them success and fulfillment in all areas of life can be extremely helpful. Therapy, coaching, and counseling are three services that can provide this type of assistance. These services have helped countless people live their best lives, but they are often confused. Although coaching, therapy, and counseling occasionally help clients with similar problems, their work is not the same. In this episode of the podcast, I’m sharing my view of the unique difference between coaching, therapy, and counseling, and all the other things that people can do to access help for their lives and their marriage. 

Lack of follow-through is a common issue so many couples face. Whether you are disappointed your partner is not following through, or you feel bad that you are unable to follow through, it’s an experience that puts a strain on your relationship. When individuals in a couple don’t follow through, trust in the relationship is eroded. It sends the message “I can’t depend on you.” Conversely, when there is follow-through, momentum is built and you have greater confidence in the direction you want to be headed in together. In this episode of the podcast, I’m sharing more about this topic. I break down what makes following through so difficult, and then walk you through a 6-step process for increasing your ability to follow through. Here’s what you’ll find inside:the top things couples WANT to follow through on but have a hard time doing consistently (see just how much you’re not alone)a greater understanding of the relationship between lack of follow-through and your negative perceptions of each otherhow being able to follow through creates a new identity for you and your partnerthe most important 6-steps to take in order to be able to follow through on the things that matter most to you.This episode is a MUST listen if you want to be a couple that follows through on your commitments and promises to each other.

There is probably no greater frustration in marriage than to not have your expectations met. Expectations are the rules we adopt that tell us what someone else is supposed to think, feel and act. In marriage, expectations are often the cause of a lot of unhappiness.In this episode of the podcast, we are going to take a new look at the idea of expectations. You will have the opportunity to work through a current expectation that you have that is not being met in your marriage. I will talk you through my 5-part process of how to question your expectations and identify if they make sense to hold on to. You willdistinguish between expectations and personal desires - and why knowing one from the other will change everything about how you make requests of your partnerlearn how to tell if your expectation is causing you to create resentment and distance in your marriageuncover the real reasons why you have expectations and honor what feels most right for you, regardless of what your spouse is doingcreate a sense of peace for yourself when expectations are not being metExpectations can be a great way to build the kind of marriage you want together. That process starts with questioning the ones you have now and making sure you end up with the right expectations for the kind of couple you are wanting to be together. Listen to this episode now and walk away feeling great about your expectations instead of frustrated by them.

Today’s podcast episode will calm your fears and help you have the right perspective about doubting your marriage.Having doubt about your marriage is more common than you might think. Many people question if their marriage will last, or if they married the right person. These thoughts, in and of themselves are not the problem - it’s what you do with them that either makes your marriage stronger or weaker.In this episode, you will learnwhat causes you to doubt your marriagewhat it looks like to live in “Doubt Mentality” day to day with your spousewhat doubt really is (hint, it’s not what you’ve been told)how being certain about your marriage is not dependent on the circumstances that are happeningIn addition, I share with you a specific set of thoughts that will help you immediately step out of doubt and into a confident assurance about your future. I’ll walk you through my 5-step process for managing doubt so that you get to create a marriage that feels secure and stable.Knowing where you’re headed together as a couple is priceless. Listen to this episode now to get an approach that will help get you there. Mentioned in this Episode: Better Together Couple’s Event: https://drchavonne.com/better-together-couples-event/

Today’s podcast episode will inspire you and show you all that’s possible for you with your spouse. One of the greatest assets you have in making your marriage better is a vision for what you want to experience together as a couple. When couples struggle, it’s because they don’t have a clear picture of what they are striving for. They get stuck in the “reality” of what’s missing and don’t focus enough on what can still be.This week, I’m helping you reconnect with what it looks like for you to thrive together as husband and wife in a profound way. You will have hope again. You will allow yourself to dream again. You will remember what it was like to love your marriage.In this deeply emotional episode I discuss:the impact of having a better marriage and how your life will be differentwhat better conversations look like among a couple and what your communication goals should look likewhat it really means to have a better connection and how it supports your overall emotional well-beinghow having better thoughts about each other radically improves the day-to-day and long-term experience you have togetherThere is such value in having a better marriage, even beyond how you feel today. It’s about having a better marriage for the rest of your life. It’s about creating a legacy for your children, and their children.Listen to this episode and then bring your longing to be Better Together as a couple to the virtual couple’s event I’m hosting on October 22-23. It will set your marriage on the path of turning what you want most into reality. Details and registration information can be found at https://drchavonne.com/better-together-couples-event/ 

Making time for your marriage can sometimes feel like a sacrifice. There are many competing demands for your time and energy. But when you don’t treat your marriage as a priority, you and your spouse struggle to connect. And connection is what makes a marriage work. In this episode: you’ll learn how to use a simple framework to think about the time you invest in your marriage you will determine if your motivation for how you spend your time outside of your marriage is coming from the right place or not you will shift the way you think about making time for your marriage from looking at what you lose to focusing on all that you gain you will understand the connection between making time for your marriage now and saving yourself time later I also share a real-life example of how I recently applied this in my own marriage. Making time for your marriage is an investment that always pays off. You’ll be more comfortable around each other, have better communication, and ultimately get along better. Join me on the podcast today for a valuable conversation about the importance of making time for your marriage.

Anytime a couple is not on the same page one person is likely to feel very disappointed or frustrated. Many people come to me asking the question of how to get their spouse on board with something. In this episode, I give you my honest answer and introduce you to a 5-step process for having these types of conversations. I make the distinction between inviting your partner to consider something versus trying to convince them. In this episode you will learn: -the right way to start an important conversation -what energy do you need to bring to best engage your spouse -how to make the invitation irresistible to your spouse -how to get their buy-in without dragging them along AND… I also share a SPECIAL invitation for you to join me at my Virtual Couples Event: Better Together. This event will be held from Friday, October 22 2021 to Saturday, October 23, 2021. Friday will be a virtual date night in and Saturday is an in-depth virtual workshop where you will be given the tools you need to create a marriage you love. To register and get additional details visit https://drchavonne.com/better-together-couples-event/

I know for many when you got married, you really didn't have many doubts. You felt like this was a great match that you were thrilled to be committing your life to spend together and you know, things happen. And maybe you're hoping to be back in that place again. I want you to know that no matter where you guys may find yourself right now. That connection, that enjoyment, that fun, that love, that passion, that excitement is still there. There may be things standing in your way right now. But all of those things can be removed. You can learn to love your marriage again and I want to help you with the “again part” of loving your marriage again. Tune in to learn more. If you are at a place where you're ready to get some help with your marriage and work directly with a coach that gets exactly what you're going through, that knows the exact plan and process to get you to a better place. Then here I am for you. You can visit www.drchavonne.com to schedule a call with me directly.

Do you feel like you and your spouse are living like roommates? Whenever you hear about a roommate, it's usually a story of something that's not working well. You may currently be experiencing a rough patch in your marriage that’s making you feel this way but here’s the thing, you are roommates. You live in a home together, you share responsibilities, you do your thing, in some ways and your spouse does their thing in certain ways. So in actuality you are roommates, it is a part of being married. I want to offer you the insight that roommate living is more of a mindset rather than an actual circumstance. A couple can spend very little time together and not feel like roommates. And a couple could spend a lot of time together and still feel like roommates because this roommate mentality is a mindset. The good news is that this is just a season in your marriage and it can change. Listen in as I share a few things that you can do and how to navigate this season in your marriage. if you and your spouse are both interested in addressing how disconnection is a problem in your marriage. I am here to support you. Together, we will talk about what's been happening, what you want for your marriage and how to permanently move you out of the roommate living situation. Book your call now at www.drchavonne.com.

For many women, there's an emotional reactivity and a heightened sense of fear and anxiety that's often at play when it comes to parenting our children. It's like you reflect back on your own childhood and find yourself being in the space of not wanting to make the same mistakes with your children that you perceive that your parents made. This can result in having parenting differences in your marriage since you may not always be a united front in all of your parenting scenarios. This can be very frustrating but I want you to know that this is a very common topic that I coach on and it can get better. So what I'm going to share with you today are several perspectives and tips and strategies that you can employ when you find yourself growing more and more frustrated by parenting differences with your spouse. I also want to offer that even though this topic is specific to parenting, you can apply these principles I'm going to share to any significant difference between you and your spouse. If you are really struggling with some of the differences between you and your spouse, coaching can really help you. We can work together one on one and do a deep dive into, we can look at every aspect of your marriage, where it feels like you and your spouse are not on the same page, we can find how to think about it differently, how to feel differently about it, and how to approach the situations in ways that are really just going to be much more effective than maybe what you've been doing so far. If you're ready to do this work I want to invite you to a private call with me, it is a complimentary consultation, and you can book your call today at www.drchavonne.com.

Shutting down in a marriage may look like a lot of different things. You may find your spouse is more distant, withdrawn, distracted, or defensive. This can be a difficult time, especially if you deeply want to connect and work on things together. In this episode I share the reasons why your spouse may have shut down, and how you can still move yourself forward in a positive direction. I also share three critical things to keep in mind so that you remain encouraged and believe in a better future together. You CAN have a marriage that you love, a marriage that your spouse loves and a marriage that you both are very proud of. Press play to learn more.

What does it mean to hold space for someone else? It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. For your spouse, this means the same thing. If we aren't as happy as we can be in the marriage, it's likely because we see something in our spouse that we would like to be different. In this episode I offer you six steps that will help you hold the space and find peace with exactly where your spouse is. These steps will help you create a breakthrough for yourself and actually start feeling the way that you want to be feeling. Listen in to learn more.

So often we are unclear about where we are and what is necessary to take us to where we want to be. Knowing where you are right now in your marriage is such valuable information because it helps you know where to put your focus and effort. As a coach, my goal is all about getting you from where you are now, to where you want to be and help you to get super clear about the starting line. How you approach getting the results that you want will be different depending on where you're starting from but ultimately all we really want is to fully express ourselves, to be accepted and loved and feel connected to life, to other people, to ourselves. And so if that's what we're all after, at the end of the day, there's tons of different ways we can create that. And there are tons of different starting points. Today I want to share with you the three places that I find most people start out from and how the work of marriage coaching, the work of life coaching applies, and is beneficial to these scenarios. And as long as you are open to coaching, you are really committed to doing the work and getting the outcome that you want, I can help you. If you would like to work together, I encourage you to go to my website at www.drchavonnne.com and schedule a complimentary call with me. I will be really clear with you about where you are and we will map out your exact pathway to getting to where you want to be.

Today’s episode will help you to be intentional about the marriage you want and deserve. If you want a great marriage, it won’t happen by chance. Great marriages happen by choice. When it comes to #marriagegoals, I want you to look at what you have now and build from there rather than focusing on the future idealistic version of the marriage that you want. Making what we have now be enough to work with in creating the marriage of your dreams is the best place to start. The next step is looking internally to identify what needs to shift inside of you to make your marriage better. These are the things that you have 100% control over and these are the things that can make your marriage 100% better. Listen in to learn more about setting marriage goals from an internal place. If you are ready to have a better marriage, I invite you to work with me in accomplishing your marriage goals. I can help you get clear on your goals, what's standing in your way and your exact roadmap so that you can get unstuck and transform your marriage into a loving and enjoyable experience. Go to www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

It's a celebration guys! This is our 100th podcast episode! I am so proud. Thank you all for your continued support. I appreciate you listening to the podcast and taking the time to leave a comment and a review. Thank you. So to celebrate, I thought it would be fun to share with you a few books from some of the experts in the marriage space that have really shaped my thinking and enhanced my marriage and my coaching business. Listen in as I discuss my faves and how these books and ideas can help you. And if you decide to read any of them, I'd love to know your thoughts, so let me know about it by leaving me a comment! If you are looking for more guidance and 1-on-1 support, I invite you to reach out to me by scheduling your complimentary call to see if working together is the right next step. Go to https://drchavonne.com/ to book a call.

We all have expectations of how we want things to be in our life and our marriage is no exception. And so when our husband is not exactly how we would want him to be, we feel disappointed. I want to offer to you that loving your marriage is a mindset that is not dependent on the circumstance being perfect. There are certain foundational items that are important to the success of your marriage. By removing the expectation for things that are non-essentials you will be able to focus more on the essentials. Listen in as I share some of the foundational ingredients for a marriage to be healthy and why these basics are crucial if a marriage is going to flourish. These are the seven ingredients to loving your marriage again. If you would like help to really manage your mind about the situations and circumstances of your marriage right now, I want to invite you to reach out to me. I offer a complimentary consultation call where you and I will speak directly and have a two-way conversation where I will hear everything that is happening in your marriage and then share the exact pathway forward by providing a systematic roadmap of the things YOU need to do to reach a place of contentment. You can go to, www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

We sell ourselves on things every day. Whether it’s the thing we don’t need at Target or a new habit we want to adopt, we come up with reasons to say yes. Today I want to challenge you to sell yourself on a better marriage. This involves focusing on what you want MOST which then leads you to take action in the right direction. The more time you spend thinking about the marriage you want, the more motivated you become. Listen in as I share a process for selling yourself on a better marriage so that you can more easily create it in your life starting today. And if you’re ready for private coaching with me, visit my website drchavonne.com and schedule a complimentary call. Over the next 6 months, you can have my help walking you through all of the shifts necessary to create a marriage you love again.

Sharing your life with another person can be a challenge. Marriages take work and some of this work is work that you have to do on your own. Our guest today, Dr. M., will share her success story of how she improved not only her marriage but your emotional well-being after deciding to work with me via private coaching. You will hear how she has gained the clarity that she needed to move from where she was in her marriage to where she wanted to be. There is a lot of valuable information in this conversation that you can implement in your own marriage. By gaining control of your thoughts you can THINK yourself to a GREAT marriage. Tune in to learn more. If you are ready to improve your marriage and want my help and guidance, go to , www.drchavonne.com/ to book your Complimentary Call today.

How self-aware are you? Self-awareness is probably one of those things where you have an idea of what it is, but if someone asked you to define it, you might stumble a bit to find the words. By definition, self-awareness is a conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires. Being self-aware is how you live as your true, authentic self. When we know ourselves deeply, we are able to live more fulfilled and happier lives. In today’s episode, I will share with you the power of self-awareness as it relates to marriage. When you and how you can access your innermost thoughts and your real feelings and clearly understand what's happening for you, the way you interact with your husband will be different. You’ll also be able to make the powerful connection between how you are showing up in the marriage and the impact of that in relation to your desired results. I’m sharing four specific and amazing things that self-awareness offers to you that you can use to transform your marriage. Tune in to learn more. If you are ready to master self awareness to create a marriage that you love, private coaching with me is the next step. I invite you to visit my website at drchavonne.com to schedule a complimentary call. During that conversation, I’ll hear more about what’s going on, and show you the very specific ways coaching will help you make the shifts to have a better marriage.

It's not easy to see your husband's imperfections and then choose to allow him to be who he is without you complaining or trying to fix him. But exercising allowance makes your marriage more peaceful and enjoyable. Allowance is you suspending your thoughts and beliefs of who you think your husband should be according to your opinion. This does not mean that you don’t ever stand up for yourself. You should create boundaries in order to protect yourself, your values and what's important to you but you should not use boundaries to manipulate or control what your husband is doing. Boundaries are not ultimatums. Listen in to learn how you can allow your husband to be who he is, just the way he is and still set boundaries to protect your values and ultimately have a better marriage. If you want to create an easier marriage and stop feeling so frustrated with your husband, I invite you to private coaching with me. Over the course of 6 months you will learn how to master the mindset that will help you love being married again. To schedule a complimentary call with me by visiting my website at www.drchavonne.com. This is the pathway to creating different results in your marriage and I can 100% help you with that.

Throughout your marriage, there will be times when you need to have "must-have" conversations to work out some issues. Other times you may just need to manage those perceived issues differently in your mind. If you find yourself often struggling to have productive conversations it could be a sign that the approach to those must-have conversations needs a revision. Today, I will share five reasons why talking about your issues in marriage doesn’t always work. Listen in to gain some clarity on how to view the issues differently to then move in a more productive conversation. If you are looking for help to improve your marriage and are ready to make more progress than you have ever made before, I invite you to consider private coaching with me. To explore if this is the right next step for you, schedule a complimentary call with me by visiting my website at www.drchavonne.com.

Improving your marriage can be very hard and confusing when you don’t have a step by step plan. There are stages when going from a relationship where you don’t get along, to one where you are passionately in love again. In this episode I’m sharing the 5 phases of making your marriage work. As you listen, think about which stage you are in and what needs to happen to move you to the next stage. Understanding the natural progression to making your marriage better will give you a goal mark to reach for and builds your hope in your ability to reach the final outcome you want. I also want you to know this is something I can help you with directly. I help my private clients get unstuck and transform unhappy marriages into loving and enjoyable marriages. I invite you to connect with me to discuss how my private coaching program can help you love your marriage again. Just go to www.drchavonne.com/work-with-me to schedule your complimentary call.

Do you feel like you are doing all the things to improve your marriage but you still feel stuck? This is a common situation that many people have faced at some point in their marriage. You diligently take all the right actions and patiently wait for that new season of your marriage to arrive but it feels like your marriage is nowhere near what you dreamed it would be.Though it may feel overwhelming, the good news is that there are solutions for every problem and today I’d like to give you some additional tools to help you on this journey by sharing with you five reasons you're not making progress and how to change that now. If you need help to change the experience of your marriage, connect with me. I can help you with the process of becoming unstuck. I encourage you to visit my site at www.drchavonne.com to schedule a call today.

Today I want to share with you a new concept that I created and recently shared with my private coaching clients. I call this concept the Trigger Triad and it’s all about self-awareness. This idea offers you an opportunity to navigate and quickly recover from your triggers so that you can move on to the […]

When people think of self-care they usually think of ways to physically care for themselves. Physical self-care is important and should not be ignored. There is, however, another type of self-care that I would like us to discuss today and that is emotional self-care. This form of self-care is important because when a spouse who […]