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UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

587 episodes — Page 2 of 12

Ep 460460. How to Get Your Financial Footing in Crazy Times: A Conversation with Tori Dunlap

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When the world feels financially chaotic, it’s easy to slip into survival mode and feel like money is the only thing standing between you and safety. To explore why this happens and how to create a steadier sense of financial safety, I’m joined by New York Times bestselling author, Tori Dunlap.Together, we talk about the systemic barriers women face, the guilt around wanting more, and why avoiding your numbers only increases stress. You’ll hear why financial education is one of the most powerful tools women have right now, and what changes when you start seeing yourself as a capable, autonomous financial agent.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/458Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/Follow Tori on Instagram: instagram.com/torikdunlap/Her First 100K: herfirst100k.com

Jan 22, 202634 min

Ep 459459. Coaching Hotline: When to Accept Reality & How to Handle Jealousy in Polyamory

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Ever wonder if you are pushing toward a bold goal or just fighting reality and wearing yourself out? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener question about how to tell the difference between challenging limits and ignoring real constraints like your energy, time, and capacity.I also answer a question about jealousy in polyamory and what to do when you feel physically activated watching your partner show affection to someone else. I break down why the sensation in your body is created by your thoughts, not the situation itself, and why this is work you want to do before you are in the moment.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/459Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 20, 202613 min

Ep 458458. How to Solve Insecurity (Greatest Hits)

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Do you feel like you are always falling short of some invisible standard, no matter how hard you try? That sense of inadequacy can creep into your work, your relationships, and how you relate to your body, and it can quietly run your life if you never stop to question it.In this episode, I explore why insecurity is not a personality flaw or something you need to fix, but a signal that you do not feel emotionally safe with yourself. I break down how socialization trains us to measure our worth against external rules and expectations that were never designed to serve us, and why that keeps us feeling perpetually not good enough. Hit play to learn how to stop outsourcing your sense of safety and value, and how to build emotional security from the inside.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/458Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 15, 202615 min

Ep 457457. Coaching Hotline: Will Practicing Thought Work Make Me Less Emotional?

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Does doing thought work make you calmer or does it turn you into someone who feels less emotional and more rigid? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener's question about whether becoming more logical means losing access to their emotions. You'll also hear my answer to a question from a listener who feels constantly angry during long school drop-off drives and blames other drivers. I'll show you how owning your choices and managing your mind can radically change how you feel without changing a single circumstance. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/457Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 13, 202612 min

Ep 456456. Better Boundaries & Instant Obligation Syndrome

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Ever notice how when someone asks you for something, you immediately feel like you should say yes? Whether it's a colleague wanting to pick your brain over coffee or your kid's school asking you to bake for the school fundraiser, there's this instant weight that settles on your shoulders. In this episode, I'm naming something that hasn't been talked about before but affects almost everyone socialized as a woman: Instant Obligation Syndrome.  I'll explain why this happens, how it's rooted in the socialization that teaches women their purpose is to serve others, and why you feel like you need a "good reason" to say no. Most importantly, I'll show you why this pattern is costing you far more than you realize.  Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/456 Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 8, 202623 min

Ep 455455. Coaching Hotline: Self-Doubt in Your Career & Battling Procrastination

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Why is it so easy to doubt ourselves, even when we’ve already proven we’re capable? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener's question about feeling unqualified despite a successful career. She’s struggling with thoughts that her associate's degree makes her less than others in her field, even though her work experience speaks for itself. The second question is about how to manage the flood of self-doubt that comes up when pursuing big goals. A coach is working on expanding her business, but finds herself stuck in a cycle of procrastination and negative thoughts. If you’ve ever felt like your thoughts were holding you back, this episode will help you move through them and take consistent action toward your goals. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/455Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 6, 202611 min

Ep 454454. Are You Afraid of Being Too Much?

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Ever feel like you’re "too much" for others? Like when someone tells you you're too sensitive, too needy, or taking things too seriously?In this episode, I explore why the fear of being "too much" is so common among women and how it limits us from living fully. You'll discover why this vague but powerful fear gets weaponized against women and marginalized communities, and how to start rewiring your brain around it.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/454Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Jan 1, 202620 min

Ep 453453. Coaching Hotline: Making Mistakes at Work & Coping with Stress

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Do you ever find yourself paralyzed by the fear of making a mistake at work, no matter how small? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions that dive into how we handle fear, stress, and the pressure to be perfect.The first question is from someone working in a high-stakes field, terrified of making mistakes and facing professional consequences. The second question is about dealing with stress-induced habits like overeating or drinking, and the guilt that follows. I show you why you can’t solve the problem by just focusing on behavior... it’s your thoughts and emotions that need attention.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/453Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 30, 202512 min

Ep 452452. How to Be Decisive (Greatest Hits)

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Why is it so hard to make a decision? So many of us get stuck in a cycle of overthinking, second-guessing, or waiting for external validation before we can make a choice. So in this episode, I’m sharing why women often struggle with decisiveness and how our socialization shapes the way we approach decision-making and risk. You’ll learn why embracing decisiveness is crucial for creating the life you want and get practical tips for using self-coaching to make confident, purposeful decisions that align with your goals. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/452 Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 25, 202525 min

Ep 451451. Coaching Hotline: Social Media Thoughts & Boundaries with Mom

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In this Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions that are all too familiar if you’ve ever gotten sucked into social media comparison or felt like you’re constantly navigating emotional landmines with family. The first is about how to stop feeling awful about yourself every time you scroll through Instagram, comparing yourself to others or feeling like you’re not doing enough. The second question is about dealing with a family member who’s set boundaries that leave you feeling rejected. This episode will teach you how to separate your feelings from someone else’s behavior, take full responsibility for your emotional life, and stop outsourcing your worth to others. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/451Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 23, 202510 min

Ep 450450. How to Create Self Trust

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Most of us think self-trust means knowing we'll always make the right decision and that our future self will behave perfectly. But in this episode, you'll hear why this impossible standard actually sets you up to never trust yourself - and how that erodes both your confidence and your ability to create what you want in life. I share examples from my own life and give you practical steps to start creating the kind of self-trust that allows you to handle whatever comes up - not because you'll do everything right, but because you know you can deal with whatever happens. Learn more about A Confident Life here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/aconfidentlife/ Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/450Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 18, 202525 min

Ep 449449. Coaching Hotline: Obsessing Over Sexual & Romantic Rejections

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When you’re replaying a breakup, imagining a different version of yourself your partner might have loved more, or worrying that someone is “settling,” the problem isn’t the relationship, it’s the way your brain is using other people’s opinions to try to regulate your self-worth. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions about rejection and attraction that illustrate how quickly your mind will outsource your value to someone else’s thoughts. I break down why your brain becomes so invested in mental rehearsals, fantasies, and what-ifs, and how those patterns keep you from seeing your actual emotional life clearly. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/449Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 16, 202510 min

Ep 448448. How Your Fantasy Self Can Lead You Astray

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When you imagine yourself in the future, what do you see? Are you meditating at 5 a.m. before diving into the picture-perfect morning routine? Are you living by the beach with a business that makes money while you sleep? Are you making holiday cookies with your kids without ever spilling flour all over the floor? In this episode, I'm breaking down a crucial distinction that most self-help exercises about connecting to your future self completely miss: the difference between your future self and your fantasy self. You'll learn specific ways to check whether you're connecting to a helpful future self who has actual advice about your growth, or if you're indulging in a fantasy that keeps you stuck. Learn more about A Confident Life here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/aconfidentlife/ Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/448Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 11, 202520 min

Ep 447447. Coaching Hotline: Frustration with Kids, Two Flavors

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Playing with your preschooler should be fun, right? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that dig into common parenting frustrations. The first tackles how to show up authentically when your preschooler's bossiness during play triggers irritation. The second explores managing all those thoughts about how children "should" behave. You'll learn practical ways to reframe your irritation, understand what being "authentic" really means in parenting, and get curious about those inherited beliefs about how kids should act. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/447Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 9, 202510 min

Ep 446446. Borrow My Thoughts For Your 2026 Goals

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If you have big goals for 2026 but no idea what thoughts your brain actually needs to think to create them, this episode will give you a much clearer map. I’m breaking down the kinds of thought patterns that keep you stuck in body insecurity, imposter syndrome, dating frustration, family tension, or money anxiety and how to use the four Confidence Compass skills to shift those patterns for good. No matter what your goals are, you will hear at least one thought you can borrow and apply immediately to the area of your life you want to evolve next. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/446Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/ Join me to for Create More Confidence: A Pop-Up Coaching Program on December 8-10, 2025 here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/confident

Dec 4, 202538 min

Ep 445445. Coaching Hotline: Feeling Trapped at Work & Compassion for Other People's Brains

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In this Coaching Hotline episode, you'll hear two listener questions that will feel familiar if you have ever wondered why your new thoughts seem to “stop working” or why believing you can handle future challenges feels harder than it should. I break down what is really happening underneath that experience so you can see it with a lot more clarity. I also talk about the mental spiral that happens when someone else’s unmanaged mind feels irritating, and why that reaction is more revealing about your own thought patterns than you think. If you have ever felt stuck between what you know intellectually and what your brain insists on believing, this episode will show you how to shift that dynamic from the inside out. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/445Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Dec 2, 20259 min

Ep 444444. Acting on Possibility & The Purpose of Goals (Confidence Compass Skill 4)

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If you could become the fullest version of yourself, what would that even look like? After coaching thousands of women for nearly a decade, I can tell you this is the real question beneath every goal, every dream, and every moment of frustration. We all want self-actualization, but most of us stay stuck not because we lack ambition, but because we have never been taught the skill that makes self-actualization possible. In this episode, I explain why self-actualization has nothing to do with your circumstances, your upbringing, your bank account, or the state of the world. It comes from learning how to act on possibility instead of waiting for certainty. I teach you how to move your threshold for action from probable to possible, and why this shift is essential if you want to grow into your future self. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/444Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/ Join me to for Create More Confidence: A Pop-Up Coaching Program on December 8-10, 2025 here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/confident

Nov 27, 202517 min

Ep 443443. Coaching Hotline: Doing Something Bigger & A Complaining Diet

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What happens when you’re stuck between wanting more for yourself but not knowing how to get there? In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I dive into how to break free from the confusion and indecision that come with craving something bigger, but not knowing what that actually means for you. I also address the all-too-common habit of complaining and why we so often turn to others for validation, even when it doesn’t actually help us move forward. You’ll learn how to swap complaints for empowering thoughts and why trying out a “complaining diet” is a game-changer for shifting your mindset. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/443Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 25, 202512 min

Ep 442442. Self Belief v Self Esteem (And Which One Wins) (Confidence Compass Skill 3)

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We hear a lot about self esteem these days. Why it matters, how to get more of it, and what it means when you feel like you do not have enough. Most people think that improving their self esteem will automatically make them more confident, but to create real and lasting confidence, they are missing something essential: self belief. In this episode, I am breaking down the difference between the two and explaining why self belief is the skill that actually moves your life forward. You will also learn why your brain resists confidence in the first place and how to work through the fears that keep you playing small. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/442Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/ Join me to for Create More Confidence: A Pop-Up Coaching Program on December 8-10, 2025 here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/confident

Nov 20, 202519 min

Ep 441441. Coaching Hotline: Thoughts That Made Me My First Million & Relationship Betrayal

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When you're building a business, raising a family, or navigating relationships, those uncomfortable feelings of inadequacy, jealousy or betrayal feel like roadblocks. But what if they're actually signposts pointing you toward exactly what you need to examine? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that dig into the messy, uncomfortable territory of growth. First, I'm sharing the specific thoughts that took me to the million-dollar mark by year three of my business. Then I'm answering a question from a listener who agreed to let her partner sleep with someone else and now feels consumed by regret and betrayal. Tune in to hear how the thoughts creating your biggest challenges often contain the seeds of your breakthrough. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/441Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 18, 202515 min

Ep 440440. Self-Compassion Without Self-Pity (Confidence Compass Skill 2)

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Do you worry that if you practice self-compassion, you’ll stop getting things done or start letting yourself off the hook? This is a common fear, and it comes from confusing self-compassion with self-pity. In this episode, I’m teaching the second skill of the Confidence Compass: self-compassion. You’ll learn how self-pity, self-criticism, and self-compassion form a spectrum, and why real confidence comes from balancing self-awareness with empathy. I’ll show you how self-compassion allows you to meet yourself honestly and kindly while still taking responsibility for your growth and evolution. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/440Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 13, 202517 min

Ep 439439. Coaching Hotline: Making Thoughts Conscious & How to Stop Being Overwhelmed

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Most of your thoughts are running on autopilot, shaping how you feel and act without you even realizing it. The good news is that you can learn to access those unconscious thoughts and bring them into your awareness, but only if you know how to look for them. This week, I’m answering two questions that get right to the heart of this work: how to uncover hidden thought patterns and how to stop feeling overwhelmed when you want to change everything at once. You’ll learn the simplest daily practice for making your unconscious thoughts visible, why confusion is your brain’s favorite form of procrastination, and how to get out of the “I have too much to fix” mindset that keeps you stuck. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/439Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 11, 20259 min

Ep 438438. Creating Accurate Self-Awareness (Confidence Compass Skill 1)

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When I was in my twenties and early thirties, I thought I was deeply self-aware. I’d read the books, gone to therapy, and could explain all my patterns in perfect detail. But nothing was really changing. It wasn’t until I learned what self-awareness actually means and why understanding your story isn’t the same as understanding your mind that I finally started to experience change. In this episode, I’m teaching the first skill of the Confidence Compass: true self-awareness. You’ll learn why intellectual insight doesn’t create transformation and how to uncover the subconscious thoughts that are really driving your feelings and actions. I’ll share examples from my own life and my clients, from dating anxiety to money blocks, to show how powerful this shift can be. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/438Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 6, 202516 min

Ep 437437. Coaching Hotline: Fear of Flying and Was Elizabeth Holmes Using Thought Work?

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In this week’s Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two questions that get to the core of how we manage our minds. The first explores how to handle phobias, like the fear of flying, and panic attacks by changing our relationship with anxiety itself. The second dives into a meta question about thought work: could managing our thoughts turn us into sociopaths? A listener draws parallels to Elizabeth Holmes and the Theranos scandal, wondering if there's a line between healthy thought management and dangerous self-deception. You'll discover why accepting anxiety instead of resisting it changes everything, and how true thought work differs from ego-driven deception.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/437Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Nov 4, 202518 min

Ep 436436. The Only Tool You Need for More Confidence in 2026: The Confidence Compass

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You’ve hit the milestones: the degree, the dream job, the relationship that looks right on paper. But no matter how much you achieve, that deep sense of confidence still feels out of reach. That isn’t because you’re missing something; it’s because we’ve all been taught to think about confidence the wrong way. Tune in this week to discover what The Confidence Compass is and how it brings together everything I’ve learned over a decade of teaching women how to live boldly and feel grounded in who they are. This framework will help you finally build a confident life, one where you stop chasing approval and start feeling fully alive. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/436Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 30, 202516 min

Ep 435435. Coaching Hotline: Regretting Years in Therapy & Dealing with Romantic Rejection

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You’ve done the therapy, read the books, and gained awareness, but the same anxious thoughts still run the show. This week’s Coaching Hotline episode dives into why understanding your patterns isn’t enough to change them and what’s really required to create lasting emotional shifts. I help one listener who’s been through years of therapy without relief and another who’s stuck chasing validation after a breakup. Tune in to learn why insight alone doesn’t rewire your brain, how to move from self-awareness to self-mastery, and why rejection or stuckness never means you’re broken. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/435Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 28, 202511 min

Ep 434434. What Everyone Gets Wrong About Confidence (Greatest Hits)

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Most people think confidence is just about feeling good about yourself, but that is only the beginning. In this episode, I am revisiting one of the most important concepts I have ever taught: what true confidence actually is, and what it is not. When you stop thinking of confidence as a fleeting feeling and start seeing it as a mindset and a relationship with yourself, everything changes. Listen in as I explore how women are socialized to doubt themselves, why that erodes confidence, and what true confidence requires of you.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/434Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 23, 202514 min

Ep 433433. Coaching Hotline: How to Not Take On Other People’s Pain

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In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that get to the heart of managing our emotions and taking action despite resistance. The first listener struggles with guilt when their actions unintentionally cause someone they love pain. The second listener is trying to build a consistent thought work routine, but often doesn’t feel like doing it and avoids the work.Through hearing my answers to these questions, you’ll learn why it's not your job to manage or fix others’ emotions, and how taking responsibility for them only adds unnecessary guilt and keeps you stuck. You’ll also discover how to change your relationship with the “I don’t want to” thought and how successful people show up and take action regardless of their feelings.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/433Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 21, 202514 min

Ep 432432. Creating Self-Confidence (Greatest Hits)

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Confidence doesn’t come from promotions, degrees, or other people telling you that you’re impressive. In this episode, I revisit one of the earliest conversations on the podcast to break down the myths about where confidence comes from and why relying on external validation alone never works.You’ll learn why starting with your past accomplishments is helpful but not enough and how the deeper work of confidence comes from developing internal trust in yourself. This episode lays the foundation for building confidence that is self-generated, resilient, and ready to support all areas of your life.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/432The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

Oct 16, 202522 min

Ep 431431. Coaching Hotline: When To Speak Up and How

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Other people are going to make choices you don’t agree with - your partner won’t go to therapy, your family says things that clash with your values, your friends act in ways that frustrate you. The real question isn’t how to change them - it’s how you’re going to show up for yourself when faced with choices you don’t like.In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that get right to the heart of accepting other people’s autonomy. I share why trying to control someone else’s choices only creates suffering, how to support yourself first, and how to decide what you’re actually willing to live with. You’ll learn how to speak up when it matters, let go when it doesn’t, and manage your own mind so you can stay grounded without burning out trying to fix people who aren’t ready to change.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/431Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 14, 202512 min

Ep 430430. How to Embrace Friction and Grow From It

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Friction feels annoying, stressful, and uncomfortable, but it is also where real growth happens. In this episode, I show you how to stop avoiding discomfort and start using it to build confidence, resilience, and stronger connections. You’ll learn why your brain resists effort and failure, how to reframe frustration as progress, and simple ways to practice tolerating and even seeking out productive friction. By the end, you’ll see why the challenges you face are exactly what make you stronger and more capable. Let's go!Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/430The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

Oct 9, 202513 min

Ep 429429. Coaching Hotline: How to Handle “Bad Behavior” From Your Partner

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We spend so much time telling ourselves how other people should act and it keeps us frustrated, anxious, and stuck. In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that expose this trap. One caller is constantly angry about her partner’s availability, the other worries that her friends aren’t putting in as much effort as her. Both show how our expectations about how others behave can hijack our emotions and cloud our judgment. Tune in to hear why trying to control or judge other people never works - and what actually does. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/429Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Oct 7, 202514 min

Ep 428428. How to Stop Emotional Outsourcing with Bea Albina

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Ever feel like you’re constantly giving love, safety, or approval away, but never getting enough back? Today’s guest is Bea Albina, author of the brand-new book End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist, and People-Pleasing Habits. We’re breaking down emotional outsourcing, the habit of looking outside yourself for validation, and how it secretly shapes your relationships, work, and sense of self.We dig into practical ways to reconnect with your body, notice what you actually want, and reclaim your inner authority. You’ll get tools to break patterns of people-pleasing and perfectionism, shift how you relate to others, and start living from a place of self-trust rather than external approval.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/427Get Bea's new book here: beatrizalbina.com/bookThe Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

Oct 2, 202529 min

Ep 427427. Coaching Hotline: When You're Told to "Just Get Over It"

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Ever been told to “just get over it” and felt like it made everything worse? In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I answer a listener who’s struggling with that exact phrase and the pressure to move on before they’re ready. We dig into why vague instructions like this don’t help your brain—and what actually does.I also tackle a question about imagined critics and the way we judge ourselves through faceless others. Tune in to reclaim your authority over your thoughts, and discover the tools to stop letting your brain run the show.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/427Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Sep 30, 20259 min

Ep 426426. Scientific Proof This Coaching Works Published in JAMA: A Conversation with Dr. Tyra Fainstad and Dr. Adrienne Mann (Greatest Hits)

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In this Greatest Hits episode, we’re diving into the science behind why coaching works—and why it can completely transform high-pressure careers. I’m revisiting my conversation with Dr. Tyra Fainstad and Dr. Adrienne Mann about their groundbreaking research, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA), and how structured coaching can change not just individual outcomes, but entire organizational cultures. Tune in to discover what their study revealed about coaching’s real-world impact, why traditional systems often leave women disproportionately stressed, and how coaching can produce measurable improvements in both performance and well-being.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/426The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.com/Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Sep 25, 202540 min

Ep 425425. Coaching Hotline: Resisting Pleasure or Not Enjoying It

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Do you ever feel like you're chasing future happiness—only to miss out on the joy of right now? That nagging feeling that you should be doing something else or preparing for what’s next keeps you stuck in a loop of dissatisfaction.In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two questions about being present and actually enjoying life, instead of endlessly striving for the next goal. I break down why our brains love to sabotage our peace and show you how to create mental space and challenge the beliefs that keep you from being present.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/425

Sep 23, 202510 min

Ep 424424. Turning Compare & Despair Into Motivation & Inspiration

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Ever felt that gut punch when you see someone else living the life you want? Maybe they’ve landed your dream job, bought your ideal house, or achieved the business success you’re chasing. It feels awful—like proof that you’ll never get there.In this episode, I’m showing you how to turn those painful feelings of envy and comparison into fuel for your own growth. You’ll learn the two key questions to ask yourself when envy strikes, how to challenge the scarcity mindset that keeps you stuck, and most importantly, I’ll teach you how someone else’s success can become your roadmap, not your roadblock.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/424

Sep 18, 202514 min

Ep 423423. Coaching Hotline: Are Moods Contagious & When Should We Share Our Feelings?

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In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions that get right to the heart of emotional responsibility. First, I tackle the studies on mood contagion you’ve probably seen—and show why they don’t actually contradict thought work. The second question digs into a classic relationship trap: knowing when to share your feelings with a partner and when you’re actually trying to manipulate them into making you feel better. By the end, you’ll have concrete ways to approach tough conversations that build real intimacy instead of criticism or blame.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/423

Sep 16, 20259 min

Ep 422422. Achieving Big By Planning Small

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What if the reason you haven’t reached your biggest goals isn’t lack of talent or effort—but the illusion that you need a perfect plan before you even start?In this episode, you’ll learn why chasing certainty keeps you stuck, how overplanning can become a sophisticated form of procrastination, and why the “next right step” is more powerful than a five-year roadmap. You’ll discover how to set goals that excite—or even scare—you, and start making progress on the things that actually matter.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/422

Sep 11, 202514 min

Ep 421421. Coaching Hotline: Are Some Circumstances Harder for Thought Work Than Others?

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Ever catch yourself overthinking how you show up around men—or in any situation where you feel judged? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener’s question about maintaining platonic friendships while married and unpack why women are socialized to take responsibility for other people’s thoughts—a burden that’s impossible to carry and doesn’t belong to you.Then we dive into whether some circumstances actually require more thought work than others, using the workplace as an example. You’ll learn why what feels “hard” for you isn’t about the circumstance—it’s about your thinking—and how embracing that insight can change the way you navigate relationships, work, and life.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/421

Sep 9, 202513 min

Ep 420420. Is Coaching the Career for You?

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The coaching industry is booming—yet it’s one of the most misunderstood professions out there. From concerns about pyramid schemes to questions of legitimacy, there’s a lot of confusion surrounding this coaching, especially in a field that’s predominantly female and largely online.So this week, I’m breaking down the most common myths and concerns about becoming a coach. I cover everything from startup costs and market saturation to whether coaching actually aligns with your strengths and desired lifestyle. You’ll learn the real numbers behind the industry, the different pathways into coaching (hint: entrepreneurship isn’t the only option), and how to know if coaching might be your calling.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/420

Sep 4, 202520 min

Ep 419419. Coaching Hotline: Am I Using Meditation to Escape My Feelings?

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In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I answer two listener questions that reveal a common trap: we think circumstances create our feelings, when really our thoughts are doing all the work. One caller worries that ambition has become a perfectionist trap, the other wonders if meditation is just a way to avoid difficult emotions.I break down how to tell if meditation is actually processing emotions or just soothing your nervous system, and what it really means to live an extraordinary life. You’ll learn the difference between true emotional work and sophisticated avoidance—and how to reframe your biggest life questions in a way that actually gives you answers.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/419

Sep 2, 202514 min

Ep 418418. Undoing Your "Goodness" Programming: A Conversation with Elise Loehnen

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Ever feel like you’re constantly trying to be the perfect friend, partner, coworker, or mom? That pressure to live up to everyone else’s expectations is a trap—and it’s keeping you stuck in self-sacrifice and people-pleasing. In this episode, I’m chatting with Elise Loehnen, author of On Our Best Behavior, about how we can stop chasing the impossible standard of “goodness” and start embracing our whole, authentic selves. We break down how society programs women to seek external approval—and why that’s keeping us disconnected from our real power. If you’re ready to stop living a performance and start showing up as your true self, let's go.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/418

Aug 28, 202532 min

Ep 417417. Coaching Hotline: Codependency & Anger

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In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two relationship questions—one about wanting more time with your partner, the other about lingering anger when your needs feel unmet. Both reveal the same underlying problem: telling yourself you should feel differently. You’ll learn how to explore your anger and anxiety without adding guilt or shame. Plus, I show you how thought work can be used to get out of cycles of self-blame and to make choices about relationships from a place of insight rather than reaction. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/417

Aug 26, 202511 min

Ep 416416. Expertise Perfectionism is Sabotaging Your Success

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Do you ever feel like you shouldn’t be giving advice, leading a project, or stepping into your own expertise because you’re not perfect—or not perfect enough? That’s expertise perfectionism—the constant self-doubt that tells you your knowledge isn’t enough and that every mistake means you’re failing.In this episode, I break down how to spot and release expertise perfectionism, why perfection isn’t the baseline for impact, and how to measure your effectiveness by the help you provide rather than the mistakes you fear. I show you how even beginners in any field can act with authority, grow their expertise, and make a meaningful difference—without waiting to feel “ready” or perfect.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/416

Aug 21, 202515 min

Ep 415415. Coaching Hotline: Confusion About Purpose & Accepting v Giving Up

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In this Coaching Hotline episode, I tackle two powerful questions about self-acceptance and purpose. The first caller is a mom grappling with balancing acceptance of her son's autism and advocating for his needs. The second is struggling with perfectionism, confusion about her work, and quitting projects before they gain traction.Tune in to hear how to stop tying your identity to external outcomes and why emotional resistance isn’t helping you. I break down how to navigate self-doubt and frustration, and why your true work is learning to love and accept yourself first—no matter what’s going on around you.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/415

Aug 19, 202515 min

Ep 414414. How to Find Your Purpose

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Ever feel like you're just waiting for your purpose to magically appear, fully formed and ready to give your life meaning? The truth is, purpose isn’t something you find—it’s something you create. In this episode, you'll hear how purpose develops over time through small steps driven by what excites you, rather than a grand revelation.Discover how purpose isn’t a fixed destination—it’s about trusting those flickers of curiosity and interest and making intentional decisions along the way. Tune in to learn how to create your purpose by consistently moving toward what feels meaningful and exciting, even without knowing exactly where it will lead.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/414Mentioned in this episode:Your Last Chance to Join The Society in 2025!Get in before the doors close and take advantage of all the bonuses waiting for you inside: https://the-school-of-new-feminist-thought.captivate.fm/closing

Aug 14, 202524 min

Ep 413413. Coaching Hotline: Goal Thoughts & Anxious Attachment

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Ever notice how your brain immediately pushes back when you try to change those old, deeply ingrained thoughts? It feels like proof you’re doing it wrong—but actually, that resistance is exactly what should happen when you challenge those patterns. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into two powerful questions—one about creating new goal thoughts when nothing feels believable, and another about managing the anxiety that comes with anxious attachment (specifically when your partner doesn’t text back at night).You’ll learn why your brain’s objections to new thoughts are a sign you’re on the right track, not a reason to quit—and why you don’t need to believe your goal thought just yet. I also break down how to work with thought ladders when everything feels wrong, and why anxious attachment isn’t about what your partner is doing—it’s about the story you’re making up about it.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/413

Aug 12, 202511 min

Ep 412412. Belief, Confidence, and Shattering Glass Ceilings: A Conversation with Brenda Lomeli (Greatest Hits)

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What if the key to your success isn’t in playing it safe, but embracing the discomfort of going after what you really want? In this Greatest Hits episode, I’m revisiting a powerful conversation with my dear friend and fellow master coach, Brenda Lomeli. Together, we discuss the courage, belief, and determination it takes to go after big goals—no matter the odds or the fear of failure. Brenda’s journey is a true testament to how breaking through limiting beliefs can create real, lasting success.Whether you’re starting a business, navigating personal growth, or simply pushing past your own limiting beliefs, this episode will give you the boost you need to keep moving forward. Tune in to learn how to step into your full potential and make it happen!Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/412

Aug 7, 202545 min

Ep 411411. Coaching Hotline: Fear of Being Replaceable & Plastic Surgery Regret

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In this week’s Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions about fear, self-acceptance, and making empowered decisions. The first question explores the fear of being replaceable in a relationship, and we dive into why that fear is rooted in deeper beliefs about your uniqueness. Next, I coach a listener who’s terrified to undergo a second rhinoplasty after being unhappy with her first procedure. I talk about why changing external circumstances, like your appearance, won’t solve the internal struggle. Discover how learning to love yourself—just as you are—can create the lasting peace and confidence you’re seeking.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/411

Aug 5, 202513 min