The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair

It's hard to find words for the times we are living in today. Interesting, scary, stressful, angry, strange...it feels like one minute we can have it together and the next be hijacked by anxiety. There is so much coming at us, so much to navigate and so much to sort through as we try to figure out what is true and what is not. It's A LOT for any body and brain. Though our minds are easily distracted and swayed, the good news is that we CAN live in peace and balance even in uncertain times...and we all have a choice in the matter. In this episode, I chat with Shann Vander Leek, host of the Anxiety Slayer podcast and an expert on how to calm anxiety no matter what is going on. She explains why we're all feeling so anxious right now and gives us hands-on steps to stop anxiety in its tracks...everything from music to getting outside to a simple gratitude practice. Listen to discover: Practical ways to combat anxiety even in times of uncertainty How to get grounded quickly How to move energy in the body The power of "Joy Spotting" Powerful tools like high vibe music, supplements and small daily practices that lead to big changes Whether you're feeling anxious from the collective events of the world or walking through a tough situation in your personal life, these practices are quick, easy and free and here to help you get back to peace...from within. "It's really best to take things day by day and hour by hour to stay as calm as you can during these uncertain times." - Shann Vander Leek "The faster the mind goes, the more out our body we are and the more anxious we are." - Michelle Chalfant "You cannot be joyful if you're in judgment." - Shann Vander Leek "Every single thing to help us with anxiety is an internal job. It's about a choice that we have to make." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Anxiety Slayer https://www.anxietyslayer.com/ EFT Resource https://www.anxietyslayer.com/eft Joy Spotting Gift https://transformationgoddess.com/joy-spotting-gift/ Episode #142: All Things Anxiety with Shann Vander Leek https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/142-all-things-anxiety-with-shann-vander-leek/ Coffee Jazz YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNQ9q1dUxUU Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer (book) https://www.amazon.com/Braiding-Sweetgrass-Indigenous-Scientific-Knowledge/dp/1571313567 The Magnesium Miracle by Carolyn Dean (book) https://www.amazon.com/Magnesium-Miracle-Revised-Updated/dp/034549458X The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ 30-Day Journaling Challenge https://theadultchair.com/30days/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

From the outside — and to herself — Tonya looked like she had it all together...until one day, all the "spinning plates" fell and she collapsed. That moment led Tonya to a therapist's office where she was diagnosed with depression and anxiety that had been simmering under the surface unnoticed for years. She found herself battling suicidal thoughts with stress manifesting in her body in many different ways. Determined to not let it be the end of her story, Tonya began searching for a quick way to transform her depression on her own. She prayed for a "knife" that could quickly cut through her depression and was led to The Adult Chair podcast, which allowed her to completely transform in a matter of months. In this episode, Tonya shares her inspirational story of how she used the tools in The Adult Chair to completely shift her outlook on life and get healthy FAST (and for free!). Listen to discover: How Tonya cut through depression in less than a year The tools that were most effective in working through depression The importance of self-talk and shifting skewed thought patterns Her journey of knowing who she is and learning to love herself Today, Tonya is happy, healthy and on her way to becoming an Adult Chair Certified Coach. I'm so excited to see the way she helps others transform through her own experience of walking through and transforming depression and anxiety. "The Adult Chair was my knife to cut through layers and layers of trauma." - Tonya "One of the biggest things is to be a story buster. Something happens and we interpret it negatively, and that leads to anxiety." - Michelle Chalfant "Accepting it doesn't mean you like it or you're never wanting change. Acceptance releases us from pushing against." - Michelle Chalfant "The same walls we use to protect our image are the same ones that imprison us in our pain." - Tonya Resources The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ 30-Day Journaling Challenge https://theadultchair.com/30days/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Do you ever catch yourself setting a goal…and then doing the exact opposite? Maybe it's deciding to get in shape…and then reaching for the chocolate cake. Maybe it's getting into a healthy relationship…and then cheating on your partner. We can be our own worst enemy sometimes, sabotaging ourselves and our goals. But like anything else, self-sabotage is just a part of us… and it's actually an easy one to transform! In this episode, I'm breaking down how to get into your Adult Chair and find your self-sabotaging parts. I share a client example from one of my sessions and walk you through a process to help you find your own self-sabotaging parts so you can end it for good!! Listen to discover: What self-sabotage is Why we might self-sabotage How to look at self-sabotage through the lens of each Chair How to use parts work to stop self-sabotage (using a client example) I really believe you can live the life you dream of when you find and shift the subconscious parts that keep you from feeling whole and complete. That's the power of this work...for self-sabotage or any other part! "The Adult decisions are solid, grounded, they are coming from this present place and they are clear." - Michelle Chalfant "What we want to do, regardless of what is going on in your life, is we want to get in touch with the part that is disturbing or disrupting our goal." - Michelle Chalfant "The goal is to bring your Adult Chair more present in your life. You're grounding more of those parts when you can merge them back into your Adult self." - Michelle Chalfant "You really can live the life you want instead of a life run by the old subconscious programs in your Adolescent Chair. Reach for the connection to these parts, and you can transform self-sabotage and anything else that's in the way of you feeling whole and complete." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Closed Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ Care/Of http://www.takecareof.com Use code ADULT50 for 50% off your first order More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Buckle your seat belts, because our guest today is today is about to take you on a trip deep into the human mind — and help you understand how to naturally treat everything from depression to ADHD. I first heard about Dr. David Rabin when my husband gave me an Apollo Neuro, a wearable sensory device that Dr. Rabin invented to naturally calm the nervous system. After digging more into his work, I knew I had to invite Dr. Rabin on the show — and wow, he might be the most genius person I've ever talked to! Dr. David Rabin is a neuroscientist and psychiatrist who specializes in treating anxiety, depression, stress, PTSD and trauma using traditional and alternative methods like the Apollo Neuro and therapeutic psychedelics, which are showing breakthrough results in clinical trials around the country. With a deep understanding of how the mind works, Dr. Rabin breaks down ideas like consciousness, the subconscious mind, trauma and the stress response in an easy-to-understand way. He helps us understand WHY our minds function like they do and gives us simple techniques for change — both medicinal and non-medicinal. Listen to discover: Breakthrough medicines for depression, anxiety and more that are currently going through clinical trials Common misconceptions around psychedelic medicines What "default mode" is and how to change your neural pathways (even without psychedelics) The fastest non-psychedelic way to rewire the brain The impact of chronic stress on the body (and how stress recovery works) The revolutionary Apollo Neuro sensory device changing the game for stress, ADHD and more Science today is SO exciting to me. These breakthrough, natural treatments are rooted in a deep understanding of neuroscience and human consciousness and have so much potential for healing. Dr. Rabin is a WEALTH of knowledge, and I hope you enjoy learning from him as much as I did! "The real meaning of the term [psychedelic] is 'mind manifesting.'" - Dr. David Rabin "It makes all of that content that's stored beneath our awareness all of the sudden accessible. We can start to look at that content in an unbiased, non-judgmental way and recognize that this is all part of us that we're ignoring or leaving behind in the background." - Dr. David Rabin "The process of self-healing is to accept and love and be grateful for all the parts of ourselves, even and especially the parts that we've been told are not acceptable or not welcome." - Dr. David Rabin "We have the ability to make ourselves sick by changing the way we describe ourselves and the way we think about ourselves and the way we think about our lives. Similarly, we have an equal ability to make ourselves or help ourselves heal by changing the way we think about ourselves as agents of healing." - Dr. David Rabin Resources Apollo Neuro (15% for Adult Chair fans!) https://apolloneuro.com/adultchair Dr. David Rabin Website https://www.drdave.io/ Dr. David Rabin Twitter https://twitter.com/daverabin Dr. David Rabin Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drdavidrabin/ Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS) https://maps.org/ ProjectCBD https://www.projectcbd.org/ Ketamine Psychotherapy Associates https://ketaminepsychotherapyassociates.com/ The Third Wave https://thethirdwave.co/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

In 1974 when Sharon Salzberg discovered meditation, there were no meditation apps, mainstream teachers, corporate retreats or scientific studies backing the practice like we have today. Largely considered a Buddhist practice, meditation was relegated to Eastern thought and spiritual gurus. But for Sharon, who grew up in the hustle and bustle of New York City and went through a number of traumatic experiences as a child, it was a lifesaver — a tool that showed her she could take ownership of her life and transform her own suffering. After studying in India for several years, Sharon became a meditation teacher and one of the first people to bring meditation into the mainstream, demystifying the practice with her secular and modern approach. I have followed her for years, and I am THRILLED to feature her in this episode — one that is so packed full of wisdom from this master teacher. In this episode, Sharon shares what meditation is and what it isn't and the many wonderful things meditation can cultivate in our lives, including self-compassion, healthy ways to process pain, the ability to fall and get back up again and a profound connection with ourselves and others. She also helps to break down how to get started meditating and why everyone should be doing it. Listen to discover: The heart of the practice, which might surprise you How meditation is a life exercise and skills training Why there is no failing in meditation The difference between a mindfulness practice and a loving kindness meditation What causes suffering Navigating uncertainty, fear and anger during these challenging times And SOO much more! Whether you've meditated for years or are considering starting, I know you will love the countless nuggets of wisdom in this episode. And if you're on the fence, I encourage you to take Sharon's advice and just try it! Don't give up after 10 minutes or look just at the practice time itself, but instead look at your life and how differently you respond to yourself, your relationships and life's challenges. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised! "We're not trying to blank out or drop parts of our experience. We're cultivating the ability to be with our experience differently. We don't have to take every thought to heart. We don't have to follow every thought into action. We don't have to hold onto an emotion as if it's the only thing we will ever feel." - Sharon Salzberg "It's the practice of letting go and being able to begin again." - Sharon Salzberg "We don't all share the same degree of pain. But we all share vulnerability." - Sharon Salzberg "You're not supposed to stop your thoughts; you're supposed to witness." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Sharon Salzberg Website https://www.sharonsalzberg.com/ Sharon Salzberg Facebook https://www.facebook.com/SharonSalzberg/ Sharon Salzberg Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sharonsalzberg/ Real Change (New Book) https://www.sharonsalzberg.com/realchange/ Real Happiness (Sharon Salzberg Book) https://www.amazon.com/Real-Happiness-Meditation-28-Day-Program/dp/0761159258 Faith (Sharon Salzberg Book) https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AG0BRCE/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i3 Inner Child Resource (contains 2 free meditations) https://theadultchair.com/innerchild Free Meditations https://theadultchair.com/meditations/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We're all human and we all make mistakes. Unfortunately, sometimes those mistakes hurt people we love and can even create distance or damage in our most important relationships. When a relationship is suffering, there's nothing we want more than to heal and restore it, but many of us don't know where to begin. We might have our own feelings of guilt and shame to overcome or believe the other person never wants to see or talk to us again. But as long as we are alive, there is hope of change! Relationships can and do heal all the time, and you have the power to repair the damage done and move forward in an even stronger relationship than before. In this episode, I'm giving you eight simple steps for healing and transforming the relationships in your life. In it, I give the example of one of my clients who was working to repair her relationship with her kids, but the advice here applies to EVERY relationship...spouse, friend, family, coworker, you name it! Listen to discover: Eight steps to healing a broken relationship How to start the process of repairing the relationship if there's been a disconnect What a true apology looks like How to change the relationship through actions instead of words How to forgive yourself — the most important step no matter what happens in the relationship If you're living on this planet, chances are you've hurt someone and want to know how to make it right. Tune in to discover a practical step-by-step guide to begin the process of healing...for yourself and others! "If someone is willing to repair a relationship and put the time and effort into repairing the relationship, I always have hope." - Michelle Chalfant "Forgiveness allows us to get unstuck and to move on for ourselves. It's freedom!" - Michelle Chalfant "There is great power in accepting what is...if you are not accepting where things are, you are in resistance of truth." - Michelle Chalfant "When you stay with just today in the present, this is where all things can change...including, and most importantly, your perception of yourself." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Self Series https://theadultchair.com/self More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

"Help! I think I've ruined my kids' lives!" I can't tell you how many times I've heard this from clients, listeners and even my own inner critic. No one gets a trial run at parenting, which leads to a lot of self-doubt among parents. We're all learning as we go, and it's easy to wonder if we're doing it right or if we should just go ahead and start a therapy fund for our kids to work through the issues we created. Well, this episode is here to help you put your fears to rest and help you become the healthiest (NOT perfect) parent you can be. I'm breaking down my seven tips for healthy parenting from your Adult Chair (hint: they're more about you than your kids) and hopefully providing a little reassurance that you're normal and no, you haven't ruined your kids lives (wait until you hear the not-so-proud parenting moments I share!). Listen to discover: What a parent's job actually is Seven steps to become a healthy parent Why there's no such thing as perfect Finding compassion for yourself and your kids How to handle it when your kids trigger you Setting boundaries and how to respond when your child makes a mistake Whether you feel like you've screwed up or you're just starting out and trying to get it right, I promise that it's never too late. When YOU become healthy and live in your Adult Chair, your kids will see it modeled and become healthy too. Check out this episode to get simple, practical tips you can put into action to change the way you parent today. "Humans learn from experience far more than they learn from words." - Michelle Chalfant "Our job as parents or caregivers of these beautiful little beings is to be guard rails for them...kids are supposed to make mistakes while in the loving protection of your home." - Michelle Chalfant "You can't change something without owning where you are and accepting it." - Michelle Chalfant "Boundaries help our kids feel safe." - Michelle Chalfant "Don't keep your kid on a one-way expressway. Let them be who they came here to become." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Adult Chair Membership (August Theme: Acceptance) https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Dr. Shefali (Conscious Parenting) https://drshefali.com/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Before studying the Law of Attraction, Christy "had it all" but still felt really unhappy and unfulfilled. As she began seeking, she discovered meditation and eventually the Law of Attraction, both of which led her to recognize how her inner dialog was creating unhappiness in her life. As she worked to shift her own life, she began to realize the power of her thoughts in creating her reality and that she felt called to share this gift with others. Since then, Christy has become a life coach, teacher and Law of Attraction guru, and I'm thrilled to share her wisdom with you on today's podcast. In this episode, Christy not only shares the principles behind the Law of Attraction but also how and why it works at an energetic level. She explains the way that common thought patterns or words we use with ourselves are keeping us from getting what we want and how to change those patterns to attract what we are seeking. If you are feeling stuck and not manifesting the life you dream of or if you're interested in learning more about creation and how to transform your life, this is the episode for you! Listen to discover: What the law of attraction is and why it works How we work as receivers, containers and senders of energy The ways we send out energy through what we say, think, expect, feel and act Why you might be experiencing blocks in manifestation The role of guilt in our lives and the power of forgiveness Three questions we need to ask to pivot our lives "I could actually choose my thoughts to be different even though 'what it is' is the way it is." - Christy Whitman "If you feel resistance of any kind, that's energy." - Christy Whitman "When you say words that are based in lack, anything that starts in lack is going to end in lack. When you're starting with words that are words of abundance...then that whole creation starts from there." - Christy Whitman "Most of us walk around in this very unconscious state with these automatic thoughts just going, going, going. We're not even aware. So, slowing down and becoming aware is so key." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Christy Whitman Website https://www.christywhitman.com/ Christy Whitman Free Resource https://www.watchyourwords.com/ Christy Whitman Facebook https://www.facebook.com/christywhitmaninternational/ Christy Whitman Instagram https://www.instagram.com/christywhitman1 14 Days to Peace and Balance https://theadultchair.com/14days More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

The Adult Chair is a powerful model for healing our wounds and becoming more empowered in our lives...but it has the power to change more than just ourselves. When we have the tools to navigate life's challenges and respond differently to life, it can change everything around us! In today's episode, I'm interviewing my friend April, who is sharing how The Adult Chair model helped her walk through one of the most difficult seasons of her life, first transforming her marriage that was in trouble and then almost losing her son in a terrible car accident. Through these uncertain and tragic situations, April found she was able to shift her perspective and not just change her response to life's challenges but also transform her marriage and family. She shares how the model was easy to understand and applicable enough for her and her husband to use together and the surprising peace and clarity she had when she got the call no parent wants to get. April's practice of busting stories, clinging to truth and being present through life's challenges is hope and inspiration for all of us and a real-life example of how The Adult Chair can be used to help us transform whatever life throws our way. Listen to discover: How The Adult Chair helped April and her husband get the breakthrough they were looking for in their marriage How busting stories and assumptions and connecting with their needs has helped April and her husband cultivate a new connection they didn't think possible How April stayed grounded and in the moment even in the middle of shock and tragedy Avoiding the "what ifs" and worst-case scenario thoughts of the Adolescent How we can teach our children to live in their Adult Chair by modeling it as parents The power of owning our needs and learning to receive "It's not uncommon for us both to make up stories and assumptions in our marriage. It's very easy to make up stories about each other (like) 'Oh, he's too busy; he doesn't care.' Or on the other hand, he's thinking 'I'm not worthy; she's not attracted to me.' When really the truth is, I'm exhausted or he's exhausted." - April "Having a true need and being able to share that with another is such a beautiful, deep way to connect." - Michelle Chalfant "It's important that we remember it doesn't come naturally right away...but I have found that tools over time do develop." - April "Your brain wasn't able to go back to the old you, which might have gotten freaked out and panicky, because the neural pathways are very much more now 'Let me go back to fact and truth.'" - Michelle Chalfant Resources Episode #210: Improving and Deepening the Connection with Your Partner https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/210/ Episode #146: Healthy Relationships https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/146-healthy-relationships/ Episode #148: Healthy Relationships Part 2 https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/148-healthy-relationships-part-2/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Are you ready to shift out of procrastination, perfectionism and people pleasing? I can't imagine anyone that doesn't have their hand up! In today's show, we are diving into The Adult Chair model and looking deeper at our "parts." Though this episode focuses on some of these common parts that I hear many of my clients talk about, it really is a crash course in what parts work is and how to start working with your parts on your own, even without therapy! Things like procrastination, people pleasing and perfectionism are inner unconscious parts that can run the show until we bring them into awareness to transform. Today I am going to show you how to use The Adult Chair model to find and transform your inner parts that are driving you to do things or act in ways that are limiting you. Listen to discover: What parts work is How to identify the dominant parts you want to shift A step-by-step process for finding these parts, dialoguing with them and transforming them A real-life example from a client so you can see this process in action This is full of practical tools and examples that will empower you to work with any part that is causing problems and transform it using the power of your Adult. As always, I have included easy-to-use steps for you to work with this concept today and begin your transformation right away. Get ready for shifts with today's episode! "If you want to make changes in your outer world, you have to make changes in your inner world." - Michelle Chalfant "When people say, "I am overwhelmed," "I am a perfectionist," or "I am a procrastinator," that's not true...it's not who you are." - Michelle Chalfant "Awareness is key to our transformation. If we don't know that we're doing something or showing up in a certain way, how the heck are we supposed to change it?" - Michelle Chalfant "Do not guess and think you know why or what these parts are going to say or why they're feeling what they're feeling. Go inside of you and ask that part these very pointed questions." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Why do people cringe at the suggestion of setting a boundary? So many people respond with, "I don't like confrontation" when I suggest a boundary. Setting boundaries is tough to do if we were not modeled healthy boundaries growing up. Even if we came from a pretty healthy family, few people grew up with healthy boundary modeling. In today's show, I talk about what boundaries are, how to set them, examples of healthy versus unhealthy boundaries and the four keys to setting healthy boundaries. Listen to discover: The difference between a boundary and a confrontation Examples of healthy and unhealthy boundaries Four steps to setting boundaries What to do when boundaries backfire What boundaries are not and what to do if you are in a toxic relationship Boundaries are rooted in our sense of self and come from our internal guidance system. They are a necessary part of our lives and a key to healthy relationships and learning how to speak up for what we want. This show is filled with tools and tips to help you to start better taking care of yourself, learning how to set a simple request and teaching other people how to treat you. "When I hear people say 'It's not important that I speak up for myself,' or 'I don't need to set a boundary,' I hear 'I'm not that important.'" - Michelle Chalfant "A boundary is letting another person know what is ok with you and what is not ok with you." - Michelle Chalfant "If you don't know who you are, what in the world are you defending or setting a boundary against?" - Michelle Chalfant "Get crystal clear with your wants, your needs and your desires and speak them." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Episode #212: Boundaries Crash Course https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/212/ Episode #193: Boundaries in Relationships with Nedra Glover Tawwab https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/193/ Episode #184: Boundaries, Empowerment and Finding Truth https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/184/ Episode #174: Building Self-Esteem https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/174-building-self-esteem/ Episode #173: Am I in a Toxic Relationship? https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/173-am-i-in-a-toxic-relationship/ Episode #160: Boundaries and Defenses https://theadultchair.com/podcast/160 Episode #80: How Do I Feel My Emotions? https://theadultchair.com/podcast/80 Episode #26: Boundaries vs. Confrontation https://theadultchair.com/podcast/26 Self Series theadultchair.com/self Care/Of https://takecareof.com/ Use code ADULT50 for 50% off your first order More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

By nature, all of us have the Child, Adolescent and Adult parts of ourselves...but these parts can look very different depending on our personality and life experience. Through the lens of the Enneagram, we can understand more about our personality and the ways we show up in stress and in health, and in this episode, Enneagram coach Ramona Reid breaks down how the wounds we received as a child affect our personality later in life. Our Enneagram type is often influenced by the message we did not hear as a child, and we form a personality or mask to make up for that wound. This might look like trying to be good and perfect, getting big and strong or trying to keep the peace with everyone around us, but it's always an ego response. Ramona does a beautiful job tying the Enneagram into The Adult Chair model and helping each of us understand what our Child, Adolescent and Adult might look like based on our type. Listen to discover: The three Enneagram centers and the nine types The message each type didn't receive as a child and the wounding each type carries The mask each type creates to cover that wounding What the core essence (healthy Adult) looks like for each type How to recognize our triggers and move towards presence This show was as cool as it was informative! Even if you have never heard of the Enneagram, you will benefit from listening as it will deepen your understanding of your wounding and how you are showing up in the world. If you want to listen to the other shows that Ramona has been on to deepen your understanding of the Enneagram, see the show notes below. They are all brilliant shows! "The point is not to never be triggered again. It's to understand that triggers are human and they're mine...I want to learn how to encounter them with more accountability and integrity and love for myself and my inner child." - Ramona Reid "Everyone's just sort of doing the best they can, and then we internalize that. When we're little, we think, 'This is about me,' and we create separation from our essence." - Ramona Reid "As children, we are sponges and absorb everything around us...and it becomes ours. It's why you've got to observe everything and pay attention to what's going on inside of you." - Michelle Chalfant "The work from my perspective is getting in touch with what's actually going on. Notice where our minds are going, where our hearts are going, out of presence...when we're able to be present, that's when our core essential qualities will show up." - Ramona Reid Resources Ramona Reid Website http://www.mynashvillecenter.com Ramona Reid Radio Show http://www.holisticrevolution.com Episode #51: Find Your Authentic Self in the Heart of Your Enneagram https://theadultchair.com/podcast/51 Episode #114: Deepening The Adult Chair Using the Wisdom of the Enneagram https://theadultchair.com/podcast/114 Episode #205: Stress and Your Enneagram Type https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/205/ Book: Sacred Enneagram - Christopher L. Heuertz https://www.amazon.com/Sacred-Enneagram-Finding-Unique-Spiritual/dp/0310348277/ The Adult Chair Membership - Free Month of July! https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Use code FREEMEMBER Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild/ Self Series theadultchair.com/self The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We can never have enough self-esteem. So many of us didn't have healthy self-esteem role models growing up, so we are embarking on this journey now. The good news is that it's never too late to learn to love yourself...and it's a life-long journey, so you will have plenty of people along the path with you! Using The Adult Chair, building healthy self-esteem is not only possible, but it can also happen quickly. In this episode, I'm giving you practical steps for changing how you view and speak to yourself and easy practices you can use to build self-esteem every day. Listen to discover: Self-discovery questions you can ask yourself to see how healthy your self-esteem is Why creating a practice of building self-esteem is so important The four steps to building self-esteem How to control your thoughts and shift your self-talk How to work with your parts and bust the stories that keep you from loving yourself I will always be working on my self-esteem because I believe it's something we can always have more of! With the help of The Adult Chair model, we can live our lives to the fullest and create happiness we never thought possible. Enjoy your journey of building up your new sense of self and empowerment in your Adult Chair! "Our thoughts drive our emotions up or down. We need to raise our awareness to our thoughts and watch what's coming in and out of our mouths or in and out of our brains."- Michelle Chalfant "These parts are not blocking our progress. They simply want and need our attention." - Michelle Chalfant "If the story you're telling yourself makes you miserable...you have the power to change it." - Michelle Chalfant Resources 5 -Minute Self-Love Meditation https://theadultchair.com/portfolio_page/5-minute-self-love-meditation/ Episode #84: Raising Self-Esteem https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/84-raising-self-esteem/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ The Adult Chair Membership - Free Month of July! https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Use code FREEMEMBER Self Series theadultchair.com/self Green Chef https://www.greenchef.com/adult80 $80 off your first month + free shipping More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Relationships with narcissists are insidious. They begin one way, and over time, very slowly and covertly, they change and become poisonous. We wake up one day and wonder what we did wrong and how we got here. We blame ourselves and can even feel embarrassed to tell others. In today's very vulnerable show, Tracy shares her story of being married to a narcissist, how his toxic behaviors subtly increased over time and how it affected her sense of self. After marrying who she thought was a wonderful man, her life drastically changed and she began doubting herself. She fell into a depression, lived with anxiety and lost her sense of who she was. Tracy walks us through her story of waking up to the abuse and getting out of the relationship. We offer advice for others who are in these types of relationships, including what you can do and how to begin to build yourself back up and find your true self again. Listen to discover: How quickly relationships with a narcissist can shift and how confusing they can be Why subtle abuse is so easy to miss How narcissists whittle down self-esteem and create self-doubt Steps you can take to protect yourself or leave if needed How refinding yourself after a difficult relationship can be fun and exciting The importance of community and friends who can give you a reality check when you're feeling self-doubt "You think, 'I don't have negative feelings about myself,' but something in my body was telling me I wasn't good." - Tracy "I saw what his father was doing to him, but I didn't see what he was doing to me." - Tracy "He chopped away your belief in yourself, the self-love you had, your self-worth." - Michelle Chalfant "You deserve to be happy. You are a good person. If you feel good about what you're doing and you're confident in who you are, be aware of that and remind yourself of that and step out of the picture for a while." - Tracy Resources 5 -Minute Self-Love Meditation https://theadultchair.com/portfolio_page/5-minute-self-love-meditation/ Episode #84: Raising Self-Esteem https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/84-raising-self-esteem/ Episode #173: Am I in a Toxic Relationship? https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/173-am-i-in-a-toxic-relationship/ Episode #174: Building Self-Esteem https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/174-building-self-esteem/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ The Adult Chair Membership - Free Month of July! https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Use code FREEMEMBER The Self Series theadultchair.com/self BOMBAS https://bombas.com/adult 20% off your first order More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We all have different ways that we connect and bond with others, and in psychology, we call this "attachment style." For example, some of us are anxious in our bonds, always making sure the relationship is ok. Others of us pull away when we feel we are getting too close with someone else. Our attachment style is HIGHLY influenced by our childhood and how we bonded with our caregivers growing up, and it's so important to understanding how we interact in our adult relationships! In this episode, I interview the incredible Silvy Khoucasian, a relationship coach and attachment style expert, about the different attachment styles and how we bond in relationships. Understanding your attachment style can be one of the most helpful tools for understanding how you show up in relationships and seeing the patterns that you might otherwise be tempted to blame on your partner. Listen to discover: What attachment theory is and why it matters The four attachment styles How the different attachment styles interact with each other How your attachment style creates patterns in your relationships today How to set boundaries for each attachment style Repairing shame and moving forward in relationships It was such a joy having Silvy on the show as she breaks down attachment theory in a simple, easy-to-understand way. As Silvy reminds us, our attachment style is not our fault, and it's important to be gentle with ourselves as we learn and heal these patterns. Everyone is deserving of love and capable of having secure, healthy relationships no matter their attachment style — but it's up to us to do the work! I hope this episode helps you on your journey towards healthier relationships. "Along that journey, it's important to start reflecting on, 'What are some ways I can start to bring healthier behaviors into the picture?' or at least, 'How can I communicate the tendencies that push people away or block connection?'" - Silvy Khoucasian "It doesn't matter who we pair with as long as both people are willing to see their unhealthy behaviors...it takes both people being really honest about those things." - Silvy Khoucasian "Starting to pay attention to whether our boundaries are serving us or if they're actually getting in the way of the kinds of relationships we want can be really helpful and can be paired with certain attachment styles really well." - Silvy Khoucasian "As you do the thing that's going to help you heal it, it's going to be uncomfortable." - Silvy Khoucasian "You have to know yourself, then you have to be able to tell your partner who you are and what you need. We react instead of expressing, 'Hey, this is what I need.'" - Michelle Chalfant Resources Silvy Khoucasian on Instagram @SilvyKhoucasian Boundaries Offering https://bryanreves.com/boundaries-silvy/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ The Adult Chair Membership - Free Month of July! https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Use code FREEMEMBER More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

As we reach the last week of June and find ourselves halfway through 2020, I'm having a hard time finding words for this year. It has felt like a year of nonstop chaos, with so many challenges at the global and personal level. We are all feeling triggered everywhere we turn and overwhelmed by a range of emotions. You might be wondering if it's even possible to live from your healthy Adult Chair during times like these, and I'm here to tell you that it IS possible. These are the times when we need The Adult Chair the most. It is when our healthiest selves are challenged that we truly develop the skills and practices that keep us in peace and balance regardless of outside circumstances. In this episode, I give you tons of practical tips to help you navigate times of chaos from your Adult Chair. This includes how to tell when you've slipped into the Adolescent, how to get back into your Adult and how I'm using The Adult Chair model to get through 2020. Listen to discover: The key signs that you're in the Adolescent Chair How to get into your Adult Chair What anxiety is and how to clear the mind when it's running constantly How to feel emotions, clear your energy and stay grounded What triggers are and how they can be helpful Practical tips to get through hard times from a healthy place When I say The Adult Chair model is here to help you live a life of balance no matter what is going on in the world (or your life), I mean it! It's not just a zen state that you can find when all is good. It's a practical model to help you get through even the most chaotic of times. I know it is helping me! I really believe that we are in a season of transformation right now. Our world is changing, and it's bringing us along with it. And while transformation is always painful, we are uncovering truths that have been hidden for far too long and making progress that is long overdue. Through The Adult Chair model, not only can you stay balanced during stressful times, but you can also step into your own journey of transformation and join the world as it changes for the better. "When we're faced with fear, we have a tendency to slide out of the Adult Chair, the seat of the authentic part of who we are, and we get pulled by our ego into our Adolescent Chair. This is the seat of unconsciousness." - Michelle Chalfant "We want to make sure we're living in this place [of presence] before we step out into the world or make a statement." - Michelle Chalfant "Anxiety is the physical manifestation of unfelt emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "I can't expect the world to change to make me feel better. [I have] to change and make [myself] feel better, and I say the same thing to you." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/new-york/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Charleston https://theadultchair.com/charleston/ Insight Timer https://insighttimer.com/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

As humans, we all want to avoid pain and suffering...but what if pain can be a gateway to our healing? What if experiencing sadness actually increases our ability to feel joy? In this episode, I'm chatting with the incredible Ruthie Lindsey as she shares her journey through tragedy and chronic pain to hope and healing. After being nearly killed in a car accident in high school, Ruthie experienced chronic physical pain as a result of a spinal cord injury while also walking through the death of her father and other personal tragedies. It would have been easy to simply numb out to survive, but Ruthie made the conscious choice to seek goodness and beauty despite the pain, and in doing so, opened up a world of hope and healing. Listen to discover: Ruthie's journey from numbing her pain to learning to live fully in spite of pain Why the mind/body connection is so important The connection between physical healing and emotional healing The importance of inner child work in unlearning destructive stories and beliefs Ruthie's journey of coming home to Self and waking up to consciousness — and how you can go on this journey for yourself We all have a choice to either numb our pain or to live fully and lean into healing. As Ruthie shares her story, I know you will be inspired and enlightened on what it truly means to heal, and I hope she will be a mirror of love and hope to all who are on their own journeys of healing. "When you numb the hard and painful things, you numb everything. You can't pick and choose." - Ruthie Lindsey "I feel like for me, so much of my healing work has been this unlearning, has been this remembering, has been this unwinding of the stories that we learn from the culture and patriarchy and church and family telling us these things about ourselves and that who we are is what we do." - Ruthie Lindsey "You can't [heal] for someone else. Only you can do that for you. But when we do that, we can go out and be mirrors of love, hope and healing and divinity that's within everyone." - Ruthie Lindsey "We're handed down these beliefs about who we are without discernment." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Ruthie Lindsey Website http://www.ruthielindsey.com/ Ruthie Lindsey Book https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/198210791X Ruthie Lindsey Instagram http://instagram.com/ruthielindsey Ruthie Lindsey Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ruthielindseyspeaker Ruthie Lindsey Twitter https://twitter.com/lindseyruthie Onsite https://www.onsiteworkshops.com/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/nashville/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York and Charleston https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Why do you do what you do? That question is probably more difficult to answer than most of us think...not only because we often don't know ourselves well, but also because the majority of our behaviors and actions come from programming in the unconscious mind. Sometimes, this programming happened when we were so young that we can't even recall it; in fact, most of our beliefs form before the age of five! But the good news is that no matter our programming, we CAN change our minds, rewire our thoughts and beliefs, and as a result, transform the way we act and live. In this episode, I interview the brilliant Marisa Peer, a therapist, behavioral specialist, author and speaker who helps people completely transform their lives by changing their minds. The founder of Rapid Transformational Therapy, an innovative method rooted in hypnotism, Marisa helps clients uncover their unconscious beliefs and transform them at the source. Marisa is an expert on the inner workings of the mind, and she walks us through the process for coding in new healthy beliefs and breaking unhealthy patterns. She also shares really practical and simple ways we can begin to change our mind, even without therapy or hypnotism. Listen to discover: How the mind works and how limiting beliefs are formed, even without us knowing it's happening Why and how we can literally change our minds The four-step process of shifting beliefs: investigating, interpreting, interrupting and installing new ones The three root causes of depression and how to transform it The power of our words and how to use language that transforms the mind (it needs to be practical, present and repeatable) Why the phrase "I am enough" is the KEY to transforming just about anything in your life This episode is so RICH with content that I can't even begin to summarize it here...you just have to listen! Marisa also leaves us with some beautiful information about her international "I am enough" movement, so you can take what you learn and put it into action right away. "If you unconsciously created it, you can consciously let go of it." - Marisa Peer "The mind doesn't have a choice to act on the words you say, but you have a choice to say better words." - Marisa Peer "How you feel about anything comes down to the picture you make in your head and the words that you construct." - Marisa Peer "When you hurt a child or don't meet their needs, they don't stop loving you — they stop loving themselves." - Marisa Peer "The common denominator of all our issues stems from 'I'm not enough." - Marisa Peer Resources Marisa Peer Website (free resources) https://marisapeer.com/ Rapid Transformational Therapy (for therapists) https://rtt.com/ I Am Enough (course) https://iamenough.com/ Marisa Peer Instagram https://www.instagram.com/marisapeertherapy/ Marisa Peer YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGb0bBp7bTQBHLlyAfNV-Fg Marisa Peer Facebook https://www.facebook.com/marisa.peer.therapy/ Marisa Peer Twitter https://twitter.com/marisapeer The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/nashville/ The Adult Chair Membership (June Theme: Self-Worth) https://theadultchair.com/membership/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York and Charleston https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

With everything going on the world the last few months, fear has been on all of our minds recently. Though this fear is very real, it's also related to events happening outside of ourselves...events we can't fully control. But we also all have deeper emotional fears that aren't related to what is going on in the world and are more constant: fear of vulnerability, fear of rejection, fear of being trapped, etc. They come from inside us, and they hold us back from living the life we really want to live. What if you could train yourself to face your fears and become more than you ever thought possible in life? Today's guest, Michelle Poler, asked herself that same question and embarked on a life-changing experiment where she faced a new fear every day for 100 days. Her project went viral, and she now travels the world speaking and writing about how to walk through fear and tap into your fullest potential. In this episode, she shares her incredible journey, what she learned through her experiment and her tips for overcoming fear in everyday life. Listen to discover: Why our fears limit us and keep us from becoming who we're meant to be How to practice courage and build confidence How to face the unknown and embrace change Reframing failure and choosing to see opportunity instead Finding the best, even in the worst-case scenario When we feel fear in our bodies, most of us take that as a sign to stop what we're doing or run in the other direction. But when we push through that fear, we discover a world of potential, dreams and opportunities. Michelle's story and perspective on life is SO inspiring, and I know you will walk away from this episode with fresh energy to say "no" to fear and "yes" to life! "When you radically accept what's happening, you open new doors." - Michelle Poler "Don't ask yourself, 'What's the worst thing that could happen?' Ask yourself 'What's the best thing that could happen?'" - Michelle Poler "The real enemy of success is not failure; it's comfort." - Michelle Poler Resources Michelle Poler Website https://www.michellepoler.com/ Michelle Poler Instagram http://instagram.com/hellofears Michelle Poler Book https://www.amazon.com/Hello-Fears-Crush-Comfort-Become/dp/1492688894 The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/nashville/ The Adult Chair Membership (June Theme: Self-Worth) https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Care/Of https://takecareof.com/ 50% off with code ADULT50 More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville, New York and Charleston https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Boundaries are one of those things that I think we can never talk too much about! Though this is a simple topic, boundaries are difficult for most of us — but they're completely life-changing when we learn to practice them well. So, it's time to talk about boundaries again, and in this episode, I'm giving you a boundaries crash course! If you've been listening for a while, this will be a great refresher on the topic of boundaries…and if you're brand new to the show, this is the perfect place to start in learning this critical skill. A boundary is simply teaching others how to treat us. Setting them can feel scary at first, but it's our job to care for ourselves by honoring our boundaries. Otherwise, we are betraying ourselves and putting the beliefs and values of others before ours…and that never leads to peace and happiness in life. Listen to discover: The first step to knowing your boundaries How to communicate "bullet point" boundaries How to get more comfortable with boundaries as a codependent and how to distinguish weak boundaries from loving action When to speak up and when to remove yourself (both a version of boundaries) Why we can't expect others to know our boundaries Remember, a boundary can be as simple as "I feel _____ when you do _____." This is a great formula for getting started with boundaries! Most of us didn't have health boundaries modeled growing up, and most of us struggle with setting them. Give yourself some grace! This is not about beating yourself up but about practicing boundaries until they get easier with time — and you get healthier as a result. "Before setting a boundary, you have to know who you are and what your beliefs, values, morals and needs are." - Michelle Chalfant "A boundary may have no words. It may be removing yourself." - Michelle Chalfant Resources A Guided Meditation for Setting Boundaries https://theadultchair.com/portfolio_page/a-guided-meditation-for-setting-boundaries/ Episode #184: Boundaries, Empowerment and Finding Truth https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/184/ Episode #175: Setting Healthy Boundaries https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/175-setting-healthy-boundaries/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville, New York and Charleston https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

"Empath" is one of those words that has become a buzzword over the last few years, and it has us empaths who have felt different our whole lives yelling, "Finally!" At last, the world is beginning to understand that certain people are wired in a way that makes them highly in tune with their environment and the emotions around them. Where empaths might have been called too sensitive in the past, we're now acknowledging the unique gifts that empaths bring to the table — from having huge amounts of empathy to deeply caring for others. But being an empath also comes with its own unique set of challenges. Because we're so affected by what is going on around us, we can often find ourselves overwhelmed, exhausted or just feeling "off." Self-care is SO critical for empaths to stay healthy and centered. In this episode, I'm interviewing the incredible Dr. Judith Orloff, a brilliant psychiatrist and healer, who has written a number of books on how to survive and thrive as an empath. She shares a wealth of wisdom on how to know if you're an empath, common traps empaths fall into and practical tips to live empowered as an empath. Listen to discover: Why empaths often have a hard time blocking out the world around them Why empaths are often drawn to relationships with narcissists Avoiding the addiction and anger trap (often a side effect of overwhelm) The side effects of chronic sensory overload and how to recognize them Practical tips for self-care and getting back into balance as an empath If you've felt different, sensitive or intuitive your whole life, I think this episode will really resonate with you. Empaths are kind, loving, beautiful individuals who can truly thrive when we learn to be just as kind and loving to ourselves. "Empaths don't have the same kind of filters that other people have in terms of emotional or physical filters, so when something intense is going on in the world or your life, you may have a tendency to be overwhelmed by this." - Dr. Judith Orloff "Many empaths are having problems during this time because they're not embodied anymore. They're in their minds and they're in panic, fear and suffering is in the mind. So if you bring it back to the body and heart, which is healing energy, you can recalibrate yourself." - Dr. Judith Orloff "An empowered empath is someone who can stay centered and loving without absorbing all the energy." - Dr. Judith Orloff Resources Judith Orloff Website https://drjudithorloff.com/ Judith Orloff Book: "The Empath's Survival Guide" https://www.amazon.com/Empaths-Survival-Guide-Strategies-Sensitive Judith Orloff Book: "Thriving As An Empath" https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1683642910 Judith Orloff Empath Support Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/929510143757438/ Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild/ Empath Meditation for Cleansing and Clearing Your Energy https://theadultchair.com/portfolio_page/empath-meditation-for-cleansing-and-clearing-your-energy/ More Adult Chair The Adult Chair Website https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville, New York and Charleston https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Most of us long for deeply connected relationships — it's a core part of our wiring as humans! But even when we're in a relationship, many of us don't know how to create the connection we crave. We might spend time with those we love, talk frequently and even get along with each other easily, but that doesn't necessarily mean we know how to really let ourselves be known and how to really see and hear each other. In today's episode, I want to give you some practices and tips you can use to more deeply connect with your partner — or really any significant person in your life. Real intimacy happens when we learn to share our reality and inner world, ask for what we need and stop trying to fix ourselves or our partners. I'm sharing some of the habits my husband and I use to stay connected in our marriage, some of the road blocks all couples run up against and how healing your own wounding can help you become stronger in relationships. Listen to discover: How sharing your inner world changes your relationship (and how to make this a habit) The art of active listening and mirroring Cultivating safety and making each other feel seen and heard How your childhood wounding affects your relationships as an adult Why triggers in a relationship can be a gift Effective communication and the importance of weekly check-ins There is magic when we learn to really communicate with our partners and let ourselves be fully known and fully loved. I hope the practical tools in this episode help you start building rituals of connection into your life today and every day! "Your childhood wounding and your partner's childhood wounding are magnetic...They are here to help you to see it, feel it, know it and heal it." - Michelle Chalfant "Don't go into stories about what you think your partner is doing and why they're doing it. You really want to spend time asking questions and sharing your reality." - Michelle Chalfant "When you're sharing and being witnessed, you're having the experience of being seen and heard." - Michelle Chalfant Resources Episode #146: Healthy Relationships https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/146-healthy-relationships/ 14 Days To Peace & Balance Journaling Prompts https://theadultchair.com/14days Cultivating Inner Peace Meditation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PKAxhVgOu0 More Adult Chair The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

As we discuss the rise of domestic abuse during the COVID-19 crisis and the pervasiveness of this issue around the world, I wanted to shed some light on another group of survivors: the children of domestic abuse. Whether a child is directly abused or witnesses the abuse of their father or mother, abuse during childhood can have lasting traumatic effects and shape our view of relationships and the self in unhealthy ways. On today's episode, we have another brave and beautiful woman, MaryBeth, who has agreed to share her story of growing up in an abusive household. She regularly witnessed her father verbally, physically, emotionally and spiritually abusing her mother while also verbally and spiritually abusing her and her siblings. She shares the way that growing up in that environment impacted her life, even as an adult, as well as her hopeful journey of healing and transformation. Many adults in abusive relationships cite the children as the reason they stay together. I hope hearing MaryBeth's experience as a child witnessing domestic abuse will offer a new perspective and bring awareness to the way abuse affects families for generations. In this episode, MaryBeth shares: Her powerful story of witnessing and experiencing abuse for most of her childhood, adolescence and young adulthood The impacts of abuse on her life and her journey of healing The way children take abuse on and can personally feel at fault How childhood abuse can skew a child's sense of what's normal in relationships Spiritual abuse and the role religion can play in abuse How to break the lineage of abuse The importance of grace and forgiveness for yourself and others I know you will be so encouraged by MaryBeth's courageous journey of healing, how Adult Chair work has played an instrumental role in her transformation and her arrival at a place of hope and forgiveness. Her story is such an inspirational reminder that we CAN heal, one step at a time, and that there is power in telling our stories, seeing and speaking the truth and offering grace to ourselves and even those who hurt us. If you are in an abusive situation right now, remember that your children are soaking in everything they are seeing. This becomes their model of relationship; we're teaching them what's normal. For those staying for the kids, please consider getting out for the kids. If you are recovering from an abusive childhood, know that healing is possible. There are dozens of resources on The Adult Chair website, including podcasts, meditations, courses and more that can help you in your journey of healing. If you are in danger, please tell someone. The Adult Chair community (closed Facebook group linked below) is always here for emotional support. If you need help, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline: https://www.thehotline.org/ 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) Deaf or hard of hearing, use TTY 1-800-787-3224 If unable to speak, text LOVEIS to 22522 If you are in an emergency situation, please call 911. "It's like you're in a warzone, and you're always looking at your back. We were always trying to prevent, anticipate what he might be upset about. But it didn't matter. It was never good enough." - MaryBeth, childhood domestic abuse survivor "I didn't even know I was a child of abuse. Why would anything be wrong, because I was the one who was wrong. I was the one that was the mistake. I was the one causing his frustration." - MaryBeth, childhood domestic abuse survivor "You break that lineage of abuse when you speak up and say, 'No, I'm done!'" - Michelle Chalfant "If you're in a domestic abuse situation, your children are growing up thinking, 'This is normal.'" - Michelle Chalfant Resources National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org/help/ Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild/ The Adult Chair Private Facebook Group (safe place to connect, get emotional support and share your story) https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Studies show that since the start of the COVID-19 quarantine, domestic abuse is up by 30 to 40 percent worldwide. Abusers are using the global crisis to increase their sense of power and control, and women are trapped at home with abusive partners, making them more vulnerable to frequent abuse. This is something that enrages me and that I'm so passionate about shedding light on. Domestic abuse isn't just a quarantine issue. Far too many women (and men) suffer abuse from their partners daily, and I felt compelled to do something to bring awareness to this topic. I reached out to our Adult Chair community and asked if any survivors would be willing to share their stories of abuse and triumph — and in this episode, I am interviewing two incredibly brave and strong women who are sharing how they escaped and rebuilt their lives after abuse. In this episode, the women share: Their stories of abuse and the insidious pattern of how their abusers slowly whittled down their self-esteem How verbal abuse can turn into physical abuse Their turning point, when they realized it was time to leave How they left, even without a place to go (it IS possible, and there is help for you!) The triumph and increased sense of self after they escaped Advice for others currently trapped in abusive relationships This episode is powerful, raw and real, and I'm incredibly grateful to these women for sharing their very important stories. The thing about abuse is that it puts you in a fog where all your energy is going towards survival. Each woman I interviewed shared about her "turning point" moment where she moved from being on the defense into a place of being on the offense, shifting from just trying to survive to consciously figuring out how to get out. I can't imagine being quarantined with an abuser, but I pray this will be a turning point for many. I hope this episode shows you you're not alone and gives you the hope and encouragement you need to know that you CAN leave and you can find a beautiful, empowered, triumphant life after abuse. If you are in danger, please tell someone. The Adult Chair community (closed Facebook group linked below) is always here for emotional support. If you need help, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline: https://www.thehotline.org/ 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) Deaf or hard of hearing, use TTY 1-800-787-3224 If unable to speak, text LOVEIS to 22522 If you are in an emergency situation, please call 911. "I stopped at a payphone at a convenience store a block away from the police station. I called the police, it's almost midnight, and I told them 'I can't go home.'" - Kathleen, domestic abuse survivor "I didn't have anything, but I had the determination to get out of it." - Lea, domestic abuse survivor "I would look in the mirror, and being a faith-based person, I would say to myself 'God did not have you be born for this.'" - Kathleen "There are others out there not only that have walked in those shoes, but are willing to help you reach those resources." - Lea "Pay attention to how your partner makes you feel. If it feels bad, pay attention...if someone's making you feel less than or talking down to you, it's not ok." - Michelle Chalfant Resources National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org/help/ A Guided Meditation on Worthiness https://theadultchair.com/portfolio_page/a-guided-meditation-on-worthiness/ Episode #139 Cultivate Self-Worth https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/139-cultivate-self-worth/ The Adult Chair Private Facebook Group (safe place to connect, get emotional support and share your story) https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Today, we're talking about two of our listeners' favorite topics — narcissism and codependency. I've discussed these topics individually on the show before, but in reality, they are deeply connected with each other. And I'm honored to welcome back to the show Ross Rosenberg, a psychotherapist and leading expert on codependency, narcissism, trauma and addiction, on the show to help us understand the connection between these two traits and how to break the cycle. Ross explains the "dance" of codependency and narcissism, exploring how codependency often forms from narcissistic abuse in childhood and why codependents and narcissists are like magnets for each other. We tend to be attracted to what feels familiar to us, which is why codependents often experience intense chemistry with a narcissistic partner — until the "soulmate" becomes the "cellmate." It's not until we learn to fill our own self-love deficit that we can break the cycle of abuse and start forming relationships with partners who love and respect our whole selves. Listen to discover: Why narcissism and codependency go hand in hand Attachment wounds and the origins of codependency Why codependency is really a self-love deficit The different types of narcissism Gaslighting and the distortion of our reality (the greatest tool of the narcissist) Setting boundaries with a narcissist (and why it often doesn't work) Narcissists and codependents in quarantine: the three most important tools we have to make it through This was SUCH a great episode that will help you understand the "why" behind narcissism and codependency while also giving you practical tips for taking care of yourself in a relationship with a narcissist and rebuilding the self once the relationship ends. "The child intuitively knows that the world's not safe, and they somehow have to adapt to it or mold themselves to it so they are the type of child that engenders being cared for." - Ross Rosenberg "How you mold yourself [as a child] ends up being how you're going to be as an adult in relationships." - Ross Rosenberg Other Episodes with Ross #54: Narcissism, Codependence and the Self-Love Deficit: https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/54-narcissism-codependence-and-the-self-love-deficit-with-ross-rosenberg/ Resources Ross Rosenberg Website http://selfloverecovery.com/ Ross Rosenberg YouTube https://www.youtube.com/rossrosenberg Ross Rosenberg Book: "The Human Magnet Syndrome" https://www.amazon.com/Human-Magnet-Syndrome-Love-People/dp/1936128314 Video: When You Unmask a Covert Narcissist, RUN, But Quietly! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3an9crV9feM Video: Boundaries Don't Work with Narcissists! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iF9hDRhx_hU Ross Rosenberg Event at The Art of Living September 2020 https://www.artofliving.org/ 14 Days To Peace & Balance Journaling Prompts https://theadultchair.com/14days The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

For the first time in history, the entire world is sharing the same fears and the same hopes. With so much chaos all around us and with everyone's life impacted by this virus and the quarantine, is it really possible to find peace? I believe you can find peace no matter where you are in life, and I believe that because I have lived it! I spent the first part of my life living with anxiety and depression every day, and now I wake up most days in a state of peace...one that I would have never thought possible during my days of anxiety. And while there isn't a magic pill to find peace, the good news is that we have a choice and can take small steps every day to live in greater peace. Today, I want to share my step-by-step guide to cultivating peace with you — the exact practices I use to stay in peace in my life. These steps are practical, quick and easy to practice, but they make ALL the difference. Listen to discover: How the ego responds to emotions (and why that creates problems for us!) How our stories and assumptions get us out of balance How to honor and truly feel your emotions Why you are the only one who can take care of you The five steps you can do today to find greater peace Here are the five steps I share in the episode. Listen to find out exactly how to practice these, starting today! Slow down Put your feet on the floor and ground Breathe (slowly) Check in with yourself (body and emotions) Journal to process what you are feeling Happiness is fleeting, but peace is a state of being that we can choose and sustain. This quarantine is an opportunity for healing and transformation, but we have to take care of ourselves. I hope these five steps give you the tools you need to stay in peace and balance in any season of life. "One of the things that we do when we have an emotion that's rising up inside of us is we speed up. Because what's happening is the ego is trying to solve the "problem," which is the emotion that we're having." - Michelle Chalfant "When we sit in our healthy Adult Chair, we know emotions are not a bad thing. They are a beautiful gift." - Michelle Chalfant Resources The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

The world is experiencing a time of high stress and universal confusion like most of us have never experienced in our lifetimes. We are all walking through a collective trauma together. But just because an experience is common, it does not mean we all respond to it in the same way. Each of us is wired uniquely, and every personality type experiences stress and anxiety differently. The Enneagram is such a powerful tool for understanding ourselves and our personalities, and it gives us incredible insights into how we are each processing the stress of COVID-19. In today's episode, I talk with my friend and holistic Enneagram coach, Ramona Reid, to discover the various ways each Enneagram type might be processing stress. From wanting to fix the situation or help others to feelings of isolation and fear, it's so important to understand how you respond to stress so you can recognize it and get back into balance. Listen to discover: What stress looks like for each Enneagram type How to cope and find balance based on your unique stress response How to find your "peace point" Tools for your type to help you manage stress and fear The Enneagram is not a box but rather a tool for self-discovery that reveals our strengths, weaknesses, fears and desires so that we can grow beyond our type. Understanding how you are responding to stress right now will give you more compassion for yourself and others as we all walk through a very different, yet shared global experience. "This is the opportunity to see ourselves either show up and use our tools and be present and healthy or show up and manage fear in the ways we've learned through our coping mechanisms." - Ramona Reid "Now is not a time to take [the Enneagram] and try to fix ourselves...it's more an opportunity to see what's happening from fear." - Ramona Reid Other Episodes With Ramona #51: Find Your Authentic Self at the Heart of Your Enneagram: https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/51-find-your-authentic-self-at-the-heart-of-your-enneagram/ #114: Deepening the Adult Chair Using the Wisdom of the Enneagram: https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/114-deepening-the-adult-chair-using-the-wisdom-of-the-enneagram-with-ramona-reid/ #176: Childhood Wounding in the Enneagram: https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/176-childhood-wounding-in-the-enneagram/ Resources Ramona Reid Website http://www.mynashvillecenter.com/ Ramona Reid Instagram https://www.instagram.com/nashvillecenter/ Ramona Reid Facebook https://www.facebook.com/nashvillecenterforalternativetherapy The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Workshop - New York https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

There is no doubt that it's not an easy time for the nervous system. With the amount of collective and personal fear and stress in our world right now, our minds and bodies have to work extra hard to maintain a state of calm and balance. Fortunately, we're not on our own! There are SO MANY amazing, simple tools that you can use to make a huge difference in how you feel on a physical, emotional and spiritual level. In today's episode, I'm chatting with my friend Annie Boerner, an integrative health practitioner who specializes in calming and balancing the whole person through the nervous system. With a background in neurological therapy, bodywork and other powerful techniques, Annie helps people overcome pain, chronic health problems, PTSD and other stress-related challenges naturally and holistically. I'm so grateful to have Annie on the show today as she shares some of her favorite tools for natural relief of anxiety, overwhelm and stress. From essential oils to hands-on tools for keeping yourself relaxed and in balance, this is a super practical episode with ideas that you can begin using to feel better TODAY! You will discover: How essential oils interact with the brain to provide nervous system and emotional support The best oils for immune support, anxiety, depression and more Body-based tools for calming the nervous system Stress-relieving practices and sensory resources such as brushing, weighted blankets, nature, music and meditation Grounding techniques for getting in the present moment and calming your energy The importance of fun and movement Though we created this episode in the middle of a global pandemic, the reality is that life is often stressful and challenging, even when the world is not in crisis. The simple, practical and affordable tools Annie offers us really work and can be integrated into our daily routines for greater peace every day. And THAT is some good news worth celebrating! "A dysregulated nervous system is at the root of all disease and dysfunction in the body." - Annie Boerner Resources Annie Boerner Website https://annieboerner.com/ Annie Boerner Instagram https://www.instagram.com/annieboerner/ Annie Boerner Facebook https://www.facebook.com/anniewaugh13/ Oils That Annie Recommends OnGuard Lemongrass Adaptiv Wild Orange Frankincense The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

As much as we hate to admit it, difficult times are part of life. Sometimes, they come in the form of trying seasons in our personal lives; other times, the whole world goes through challenges together, facing disasters like famine, tornadoes and disease. But just like difficulty is part of human history, so is resilience. Each of us has the ability to not only cope with what life throws our way, but to become stronger and thrive as a result. It was such a gift to interview Linda Graham, a marriage and family therapist who specializes in helping people cope with life's challenges and develop a healthy sense of self through them. As I write these notes in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic sweeping the world, I feel it is so important to explore this topic, and I know Linda's perspective will be so encouraging to many. In this episode, we're talking all about resilience, including how it relates to our nervous systems, how we can find peace and balance in the middle of pain, how we can bounce back from trauma and how we can reverse the impact of stress in our lives. We are all called to cultivate this skill through various life experiences, and while it might not be the most fun lesson to learn, the beautiful thing is that practicing resilience cultivates a mindset that empowers us to cope with anything. Listen to this episode to discover: How resilience develops and how to get unstuck from trauma The source of anxiety and depression and how they are connected to the nervous system How to live with realistic optimism, which means facing what's happening and making wise decisions about what to do next The art of skillful distraction and how to cope with pain in healthy ways Teaching resilience to our kids Navigating grief and practicing gratitude and compassion to build resilience And SO much more!! Linda also shares a number of practical body-based tools that can help us adjust our nervous systems, keep a clear mind and an open heart and face what life throws our way. I know you will be encouraged by Linda's reminder that you always have a choice, and you will find hope in the fact that nothing is permanent and we can bounce back stronger than ever. "We go through disappointments and difficulties in our life. We're called upon to face disaster. A resilience practice gives us tools and a mindset where we can cope with anything at all." - Linda Graham "The most important thing is to shift from focusing on the stressor to focusing on our own internal response because that is what we can do something about." - Linda Graham Resources Linda Graham Website https://lindagraham-mft.net/ Bouncing Back: Rewiring Your Brain for Maximum Resilience by Linda Graham https://www.amazon.com/Bouncing-Back-Rewiring-Resilience-Well-Being/dp/1608681297 Resilience: Powerful Practices to Bounce Back from Disappointment, Difficulty and Even Disaster by Linda Graham https://lindagraham-mft.net/resilience/ The New Adolescence by Christine Carter https://www.amazon.com/New-Adolescence-Raising-Successful-Distraction/dp/1948836548 The Coddling of the American Mind by Jonathan Haidt and Greg Lukianoff https://www.amazon.com/Coddling-American-Mind-Intentions-Generation/dp/0735224897 Care/Of - 50% off your first order https://takecareof.com/ Promo code: adult50 The Adult Chair https://theadultchair.com The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

I am so excited about today's episode — both because I'm interviewing someone I deeply admire, the inspiring Amberly Lago, and because this show couldn't have come at a more divine time with all that's going on in the world today. Amberly is someone I would call a "resiliency expert," and she has a lot to teach us about finding inner strength during challenging times. Amberly has been through so much in her life, but instead of letting it overcome her, she worked through fear and pain and shows us how we can find light even in dark times. She now helps millions of others discover how to persevere and live life to the fullest regardless of circumstances through her writing, speaking, podcasts and workshops. In this episode, Amberly shares her powerful story of healing from a motorcycle accident and her journey through chronic pain, depression and learning to reclaim power over her life and live with true grit and grace. You can't help but be inspired by her ability to turn tragedy into triumph and pain into purpose — and to realize you have the same choice every day. Listen to discover: How to find strength and hope in times of struggle The power of choosing our thoughts and how positive thinking and gratitude really changes your life The importance of community and why getting vulnerable is a strength and not a weakness Her unique "PACER" process for strengthening resiliency and getting through challenges we face in life Amberly's book changed my life and has become a touchstone for me when I find myself reaching for hope. I hope that this week's show inspires you and reminds you that no matter what is going on in your life (or the world), with a little bit of hope and a lot of determination, you can overcome anything! "Once you realize you have a choice, you take your power back." - Amberly Lago "Getting grateful turns what we can't do into what we can do, and it turns what we don't have into what we do have." - Amberly Lago Resources Amberly Lago https://amberlylago.com/ True Grit and Grace (Amberly Lago) https://amberlylago.com/product/true-grit-and-grace/ Amberly Lago Instagram https://www.instagram.com/amberlylagomotivation/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

As we are in the middle of a global pandemic that is causing so much fear and confusion, I wanted to offer you a bonus episode with a free meditation to help you promote relaxation and peace. It's such a confusing time right now, and the events of the last few weeks don't make sense to anyone. Some people are scared, angry, anxious or unsure how to feel. And I understand why. Nothing can prepare us for a global crisis like this. Even though I don't understand why all of this is happening, I firmly believe that we are connected to something so much bigger than us, and I cling to the fact that something good is coming from this, even if we can't see it right now. Fear makes us feel disconnected from ourselves and separated from this Love, but it's always there for us when we slow down and tune in. This free, five-minute self-love meditation will help you connect to that bigger source of Love and reconnect to yourself so you can find a state of peace and balance (mentally, emotionally and physically) despite what is going on. Whether you're listening to this during this time of collective uncertainty or you're listening at a later date to help you navigate a personal time of fear, I hope this will be a gift to you to help bring hope and healing, even in the middle of hard times. Resources More Free Meditations https://theadultchair.com/meditations/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/

You know the feeling when your nervous system kicks into overdrive. Maybe you freeze in place or your heart starts racing, your body pumping with adrenaline. This automatic response often feels like it overtakes us. But what if you could control and balance your nervous system instead of it controlling you? In today's show, I'm interviewing the incredible Deb Dana, one of the leading experts on the nervous system and the Polyvagal Theory. The Polyvagal Theory offers us cutting-edge insight into the third nervous system response that Porges calls the social engagement system, based on the Vagus Nerve. In this episode, we talk about how we can both understand and balance our nervous system — from the different ways we respond to fear or danger (including fight, flight, freeze and a new one you might not be aware of) to how we can change our response to stressors over time. We explore how we can stop moralizing our nervous response, how to listen and pay attention to our nervous system and how others' nervous systems can help us regulate. It is FASCINATING! Listen to discover: What the Polyvagal Theory is and why it's important for you to know about it Understanding the Polyvagal Theory to learn how to better balance the nervous system How the Polyvagal Theory could be linked with depression, anxiety, chronic fatigue and other ailments How we can reshape our nervous system Specific ways to self-regulate when you are stressed, based on YOUR unique nervous system This blends attachment theory, stress response, self-regulation, co-regulation and SO much more. The big takeaway is that you have a choice! Even though you don't get to choose how your nervous system is wired, you can eventually shift how you respond to situations and regulate your own system — which is so empowering! "We don't get to choose our survival response." - Deb Dana "We want to stretch our nervous system but not stress our nervous system." - Deb Dana Resources Deb Dana https://https://www.rhythmofregulation.com/ The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy by Deb Dana https://www.amazon.com/Polyvagal-Theory-Therapy-Interpersonal-Neurobiology/dp/0393712370/ref=nodl_ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

I truly can't believe we're here ⁠— the 200th episode of The Adult Chair podcast and over 2 million downloads! This started out as an experiment to help my clients, and I'm BLOWN AWAY by what it has become. I couldn't be more thankful to you for listening and inviting me into your life each week. I'm thrilled and humbled to have helped in a small way on your journey toward your most authentic self. For our 200th episode, I wanted to share a bit more about The Adult Chair ⁠— the backstory behind how it came about, what it is and how you can use it every day in your life. I realize many of you might not know where this model comes from or the dozens of methods it includes, so today, you'll discover a little bit more about all of the simple psychology and grounded spirituality that is part of The Adult Chair. I'm also sharing a brand new six-step process from The Adult Chair that will help you transform ANY situation life throws your way. Here is each step I talk about in the episode for reference: What happened? The story I made up is: What Chair am I in? This makes me feel: From my Adult Chair, here is what's true: What I'm going to do next is: This episode will also give you a crash course in what the model is and how it works, so if you're brand new or want to share this podcast with a friend, this is a great place to start! Again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for being part of this community. The Adult Chair is so much more than a podcast. It's a movement of healing and transformation that now includes workshops and events, a membership community, our brand new coaching certification and training program and tons of free resources for your journey. There are so many more exciting things coming, and I can't wait for 200 more episodes with you! Resources Inner Child Resource https://courses.theadultchair.com/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Everybody wants to be happy, and most of us want a partner to share our happiness and lives with. But finding that partner? Easier said than done. Dating can be exhilarating, confusing, fun, exhausting and all the things. Experiencing connection with another person is deeply meaningful and also incredibly complex — especially when we bring our own pasts, traumas and expectations into the early stages of a relationship. How do we know if a relationship is meant to be forever or for a season in our lives — or not at all? How do we date in a healthy way? Most of us date (and live) from our Adolescent Chair with all its fears, desires and past hurts. Add in emotions and physical attraction, and our adolescent self is running the show! But it doesn't have to be this way. You can experience fulfilling dating relationships (even with someone who isn't ultimately "the one") when you date from your Adult Chair. And if you're looking for a long-term partner, you absolutely need to be choosing from your most authentic, healthiest self! In today's episode, we're talking all about how to date from your Adult Chair, including: How to know if you are picking the right partner Control issues in dating Divorce and dating Love addiction and love avoidance How to know if it's love or lust How to let go and go with it (from a centered place) Staying connected to yourself while falling for someone else I had such a great conversation with my friend, Jackie, as part of today's episode, and I know you will love hearing her questions and learning from her experiences. Whether you're looking for the one, just getting into the dating game, trying to guide your actual adolescent children through their first relationship or just curious about relationships from an Adult Chair perspective, you will love this episode! "If you're in doubt, you've got to slow down and get clear on where you are. We need to enter into any relationship from a place of balance." "When you feel yourself disconnect from you and you're not picking up on the red flags, that's a problem." Resources The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Fear creeps in and out of our lives all the time. It's just a human emotion, but it's a sneaky one. It starts small, then all of the sudden, we're overtaken by it until it becomes paralyzing. A little bit of fear can quickly turn into a lot of fear. A few weeks ago, I shared a story with you about some anxiety I was experiencing and a six-step process to move from panic to peace quickly (check out episode #195 to discover this process). While this process is incredibly effective, I found that I still had some fear creeping up, despite being able to calm my feelings of anxiety. I began to get curious about this fear and figure out why it was coming into my life. Fear is often a future-focused emotion. It is based on unknowns, which trigger the Adolescent and throw us into stories and assumptions. When we find ourselves afraid, many people advise us to step back and "trust the process" — which is true, but much easier said than done! Before we can trust, we must find the part that is able to trust and connect with that part. In this show, I am sharing the secret I discovered to identify the source of fear and transform it before it triggers the ego. There is a part of us where both fear and trust live, and when we tap into it, it transforms fear — almost instantly! You'll discover: Where your fear originates How to stop stories and assumptions before they start (before we even slide into the Adolescent) How to discover the source of your emotions How to stop fear in its tracks and find deeper peace Practical tips for doing inner child work (one of the most powerful processes for healing) By the way, if you liked the six-step process in episode #195, the tips I share in today's episode make for a great "Step 7" that can be added on to that process — in just one minute or less! Resources The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Workshop - Nashville https://theadultchair.com/events/ Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild/ https://courses.theadultchair.com/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ From Anxiety & Panic to Peace Podcast https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/195 Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

The other day I heard from someone who was having a bad day. She asked if this meant she had lost her self-love and how she could know she had enough self-love. That conversation made me realize how little we know about self-love, and it inspired me to do this show. Like any relationship, our relationship with ourselves has its ups and downs and its good and bad days. Just because we don't "feel the love" in every moment doesn't mean it's not there! All great love grows over time and goes so much deeper than our feelings. Those bad days can be temporary, but once it builds, our self-love stays with us. So, in today's episode, I'm telling you all about how you can know and grow self-love. I go down memory lane a bit and share my story of going from self-loathing, negative self-talk, low self-esteem and even suicidal thoughts to learning to love myself. Then I share how you can do the same! Listen to discover: How I found self-love (and how The Adult Chair model can help you find it too!) How to change negative self-image into self-compassion Signs that you love yourself 5 practical ways to know and grow self-love We must become the director of our lives and not rely on others to boost us up. It's always nice to receive a compliment or a kind word, but when we learn to be our own cheerleaders, we can build our self-esteem and self-love no matter what our outside relationships look like. It's a total game changer! Resources Bombas https://bombas.com/ADULT 20% off your first purchase The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We all know the word "narcissism." We can usually spot a narcissist a mile away. They are loud, want all the attention and can be obnoxious. This is known as overt narcissism. But can you spot a covert narcissist? They can be tricky, with a more "subtle" form of narcissism. It can sting just as badly, but you have no idea it's happening (at least not initially) because it's so subtle. A covert narcissist still craves attention, but they are sneaky or subtle with how they get it. They look amazing on the outside, but behind closed doors, everything becomes your fault. You are made to feel crazy. They will blame and shame you to get their way. They look like they are socially connected, but in reality, they are inept at building deep relationships and letting anyone in emotionally. In the end, you wonder if you are the bad person in the relationship. It's no wonder that relationships with this type of narcissist can be so confusing and damaging! In today's episode, I help you break down the disguises that covert narcissists wear. You'll learn: How narcissism develops Signs that you might be in a relationship with a narcissist Sneaky traits of a covert narcissist (and how to spot them!) What to do if you are in a relationship with someone who has these traits Narcissism can wreak havoc in our lives — sometimes before we even realize it. That's why it's so important to know what to look for, spot covert narcissism and take care of yourself if you suspect you have a narcissist in your life. "They want the world to be according to them. It's their map of the world. The way they see the world is the only way. And if you don't agree with the way they see the world, blaming and shaming happens." "If it feels bad, it's not love." Resources The Adult Chair Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ The Adult Chair Podcasts https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

What do you do when anxiety creeps up out of nowhere and sends you into a state of panic? Maybe it's a stressful call or email, an overflowing to-do list or all of your worries being flung in your face at once, until it feels like fear is taking over your body. You know the feeling: irrational thoughts, a racing heart, a mind that's racing even faster and even symptoms like a headache or upset stomach. This happened to me the other day, and it felt like every part of my life was spinning out of control. The unknowns were sending me into a panic that just kept spiraling deeper. But this is why we have The Adult Chair! I was able to take this opportunity to lean in, get curious and use the tools in the "TAC toolbox" to return to a state of calm. And in today's episode, I'm going to give you the six tools I used to go from panic to peace — in just 20 minutes. Listen to discover: How to stop the ego in its tracks and return to flow state How to slow down and stop the panic cycle Mindful tools that ground us when our thoughts are spinning Hands-on exercises to bring the nervous system back in balance Tips for busting stories and getting back to calm Once we get into an anxious state, it will feed itself until we step in and stop it. You have everything you need in your healthy Adult — and this episode will show you exactly what to do to break out of panic and return to balance. Resources Care/of http://takecareof.com/ Use code ADULT50 for 50% off your first order The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

There is nothing worse than when we find ourselves caught in a bad mood. Whether we wake up on the wrong side of the bed or something triggers us and sends us into a funk, we all experience moments or even days where we feel a bit "down." Often, it can be difficult to identify where our mood has come from or why we feel this way. We might just know we feel bad, sad, lonely, anxious, depressed or emotionally "off." It can be hard to get back on track when we don't even know what's causing it! Today, I'm offering you a simple, easy-to-use, three step process to help you discover what's going on inside and shake you out of your mood: a technique I call "Purge, Connect and Reach." You know I love methods that give you quick transformation, and this technique has been SO powerful for me and many of my clients. This episode will show you how to: Get clear on and release your emotions Connect to true emotions and needs underneath your mood Find your fact and truth and shift your focus to the present Moods are part of being human, but you are in control of them! Purge, Connect and Reach will help you navigate that emotionally "off" feeling the next time it strikes. Resources Inner Child Free Guide https://theadultchair.com/innerchild/ The Adult Chair Workshop Charlotte January 30-Feb1 https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We can never talk enough about boundaries! They are so important for loving ourselves, living empowered and creating healthy relationships, but most of us never saw healthy boundaries modeled and struggle with setting them. That's why I'm SO excited to have the amazing boundary and relationship expert, Nedra Glover Tawwab, on this week's show! In this episode, we have a great conversation about boundaries in all kinds of relationships, whether it be your mother, father, sibling, your teen, your spouse (or ex-spouse), boss or friend. Nedra and I discuss what we need to learn and do to set clear boundaries, and she explains how necessary it is for our mental health to express and communicate our needs. Our conversation covers SO much ground, including: What a boundary is and what it looks and sounds like How to honor your own boundaries and not give in when you get pushback What to do when the person you set a boundary with gets mad Navigating guilt when setting boundaries How boundaries can reduce anxiety and boost your overall mental health Answers to your top questions about boundaries It's so important to take care of ourselves and have "self" boundaries, which may not involve anyone but us. These can be the most important of all! I think you are really going to enjoy this show. It's filled with great tips on how to get started with setting your boundaries today. Resources The Adult Chair Workshop https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair Membership https://theadultchair.com/membership Stay Connected Nedra Instagram: @nedratawwab Website: https://NedraTawwab.com Michelle Instagram: @michelle.chalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantfanPage/ The Adult Chair Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair

I have heard from so many of you that wanted more information on Sex Addiction so I decided to have my friend and sex addiction specialist Abbe Barclay on. Abbe is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and certified Sex Addiction Therapist. Abbe is a wealth of information and didn't hold back on today's show. We discussed how sex addiction develops, porn addiction, masturbation, if recovery is possible for sex addicts and if so, what the recovery is as well as how you can best support a sex addict and so much more. This show is filled with valuable information all about sex addiction and one not to be missed if you or someone you love suffers with this addiction. https://www.abbebarclaycounseling.com/ https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair Charlotte Jan 30-Feb 1 Connect with Michelle: https://theadultchair.com/membership/ https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ2buoRyaYIjuBugJqwKzDw https://www.pinterest.co.uk/michellechalfanttheadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

Happy New Year! I thought long and hard about this kick off show and know how so many of us strive for big change in the New Year but in my experience, small changes lead to big impact. In December I fell upon a book (it actually felt like it jumped off the shelf to me), :) that I have read several times. It's a classic book that you might have read as it came out in 1997. The book is: The 4 Agreements: A practical guide to personal freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz. I leafed through the book again and a light bulb moment happened. These agreements are key concepts in The Adult Chair AND provide HUGE shifts when applied consistently. So I thought to myself..."THIS is what people need to apply for transformation". The 4 agreements are essential for anyone's transformation so today I am reviewing what they are and how you can start applying them TODAY and experience immediate change in your own life. https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair Charlotte-January 30 -Feb 1 https://theadultchair.com/membership The Adult Chair Membership https://audibletrial.com/Theadultchair The 4 Agreements: A practical guide to personal freedom Don Miguel Ruiz Connect with Michelle: https://theadultchair.com/membership/ https://www.facebook.com/MichelleChalfantFanPage/ https://www.instagram.com/michelle.chalfant/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ2buoRyaYIjuBugJqwKzDw https://www.pinterest.co.uk/michellechalfanttheadultchair/ *** EPISODE CREDITS: If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Danny Ozment. He helps thought leaders, influencers, executives, HR professionals, recruiters, lawyers, realtors, bloggers, coaches, and authors create, launch, and produce podcasts that grow their business and impact the world. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com

We made it through the holidays! How are you feeling...Drained, relieved, elated? Now is the best time to "clean yourself off" and today and get yourself ready for the New Year. In today's show I explain a bit about how we can be dysfunctionally connected to others and don't even know it. I let you know how you can tell and exactly how you can "cut those cords". Even if we don't have a dysfunctional relationship, it's still important to keep yourself "clean" energetically and to cut the cords with people we know and love so each time we show up with them, they see us as who we are TODAY and not as they knew us from the past. Today at the end of the show, I offer you a guided meditation that walks you through exactly how to keep yourself "cleaned off" and to cut the cords if necessary. This is a wonderful end of year ceremony but can certainly be done year round. The Adult Chair Event-Charlotte https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair-website https://theadultchair.com

In a word, victim energy is just plain yucky. We fall into victim when we least expect it and "think" it feels good. We feel like we deserve to feel this way, we have been wronged for goodness sake...and then we wake up. In today's show I share with you a personal experience I had, where I feel into that victim energy, not once but twice! It felt deserving and great until I woke up to truth, to what was real. It was a wonderful experience as it taught me a lot about victim energy and how sneaky it can be. I give you a few ideas on how to get out of the seat of the victim (located squarely in the Adolescent Chair), and most importantly, that we need to choose to be conscious and make choices that empower us and not disempower us. I hope you enjoy my story (aka-drama) that I fell into and get a good laugh. I now can laugh at myself as well and see the whole experience as a gift. This is an energy I feel very familiar with now and plan not to visit there anytime soon. :) The Adult Chair -Charlotte January 30-Feb 1st https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair Membership TAC Tribe https://theadultchair.com/membership

Today on the show we have Patti Elledge back again to talk about how we can heal our early developmental wounds, attachment wounds, trauma, abuse and more by working with the wisdom of the body. This is not a show about "body work," but instead a show about how we learn to feel our emotions, our felt sense and use our body as a navigation system for healing old wounding. If we don't pay attention to our body, our old wounding lays stuck or dormant in the body. With increased awareness to the body you would be amazed at the healing that can happen. Patti also speaks to us about the Polyvagel system of the body and how nervous system regulation (and getting out of fight/flight) is necessary for true healing. Get ready for this show, it's packed with information for your own healing journey. The Adult Chair workshop https://theadultchair.com/events Somatic Mentoring Course https://Somanticmentoring.com Patti Elledge podcast on Attachment theory https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/111-patti-elledge-teaches-us-how-to-heal-our-attachment-wounds/

Ah the holidays, what a wonderful time of year. The rushing around the shopping the preparing of food the obligations to attend all the parties. It's a codependents nightmare! By the time the first week of January hits we are wiped out and in bed with fatigue from all the caretaking and controlling we did during the holidays. It can be exhausting for us codependents! In today's show, I give you tools and tips for staying "in your own lane" during the holidays and all year long. It's a mini codependents reference guide in today's show. I share with you all about the fatigue, anger, resentment, anxiety and even depression we can get if we are not "careful codependents". There is a way to make it through the holidays in a healthy way and today I give you numerous tips to do just that. From boundaries (and how to set them), dealing with narcissism, in laws, how to self soothe when we are triggered and how to stay connected to your Self (intentional capital S here). You see there is a big difference between our Self and self. Our "self" (small s) is the self that wears a mask to please everyone else. Our "Self" is the Self that knows who we are and strives to live authentically. Lots of information in today's show for you. Remember, life is a journey, an adventure. Don't cling to anything, to any labels (even codependency). See parts like codependency instead as indicators of what we need to give our attention to (temporarily), to keep ourselves healthy and to aid in our transformation. That's it! https://theadultchair.com/events Charlotte, NC event January 30-Feb 1

Happy Thanksgiving all! Today is the day that marks the official "mad dashing" around to get to the parties on time, buying the perfect gifts, lots of rushing here and there with lots of traffic and the common denominator...stress (and of course it's not all bad...we have some fun too). What I hear so much about from people is yes a lot about this stressful time of year but even more about how they lose themselves and don't have time for themselves. In today's episode I give you a few ideas on how to stay connected to yourself and stay grounded despite the holiday craziness. I also give you a wonderful 5 minute meditation that you could (I am having a hard time not saying should here), :) do daily to help you get through the next month. If you are even thinking to yourself, "I don't have 5 minutes"! Then you need to do a 10 minute meditation! We all can build in 5 minutes a day for ourselves and our sanity. This meditation helps with just that. I wish you all a beautiful and safe Thanksgiving! Much love, Michelle https://youtu.be/cFeCUfw657g This is the You Tube link for the 5 minute self love meditation. https://theadultchair.com/events Charlotte, NC event January 30-Feb 1

Childhood sexual abuse creeps into the lives of innocent children on a daily basis. As children, we are defenseless to our abusers. Dr. Gregory Williams was one of those children. On today's show, we have Dr. Gregory Williams on sharing his story of childhood sexual abuse, how to heal from abuse, what the signs are of childhood sexual abuse and lastly forgiveness. We also spoke about the importance of getting ourselves healthy after abuse and how physical illness can stem from unhealed emotional wounds, trauma and abuse. This is an incredible show and it's an honor to have Dr. Gregory on the show being so honest and open about his experience, and now sharing with the world how others can heal from a childhood filled with abuse. https://theadultchair.com/membership Promo code: BIRTHDAY The Adult Chair Membership (Free for month of November)! https://theadultchair.com/events The Adult Chair Charlotte Event Jan 30-Feb 1 Dr. Gregory Book: Shattered by the Darkness: Putting the pieces back together after child abuse. Website: https://Shatteredbythedarkenss.com Dr. Gregory email: [email protected] Dr. Gregory phone: 832-396-6525 ACE's https://acesconnection.com

I am so excited about this show. On today's show I interviewed a client and she was able to find her truth, step into her power and learn how to set boundaries-all in one show! This is a client from our membership group that wes interested in learning how to be free from the stress of pleasing her parents and standing up for herself. Our monthly theme in the membership is "I'm Free" and she wanted further help on how to apply it to her situation. It was an amazing session and she had such breakthroughs. You will be able to hear it in her voice! She even said at one point, "I feel so powerful-I can feel it!" Such a great show and I was thrilled that by the end, she was able to grow herself a very nice Adult Chair and speak from this place. :) https://theadultchair.com/membership Promo Code: BIRTHDAY Free month of membership https://theadultchair.com/30days 30 Day Journaling Challenge https://Takecareof.com Promo Code: ADULT50 50% off your first Care/Of order

On today's show we have one of my favorite people and therapists, on the show-Karen Gelstein. Karen helped us to understand our defenses and how to heal them and change how we react with others. She shares with us how humor, ruminating thoughts, missing red flags, codependency and even addictions are all ways that we defend ourselves to stay safe. We delved into the inner child and how the inner child becomes wounded and the defenses are created. Lastly, she helps us to identify our defenses and gives us the tools we need to heal, so that we can regain emotional balance and reconnect with ourselves and others in a healthy way. As always, Karen delivers a wealth of information for us to help with our own inner transformation. One Free month to the membership https://theadultchair.com/membership Promo code: Birthday Karen Gelstein contact info: [email protected] Karen Gelstein previous podcast: Love Addiction-Love Avoidant https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/102-love-addiction-love-avoidant-with-karen-gelstein/