Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

Our working lives can be stressful. The last thing we want to do is bring that stress and worry home. Here is a great little tapping technique that you can do every day before you leave work that will only take a few minutes. It will ensure that you leave any work stress behind so you can go home and enjoy the rest of your evening.

I want you to imagine you are meeting someone for the very first time. They know nothing about you. You have to describe yourself to that person, but you can only use one word descriptions. Which words would you use? Father, wife, grandson, teacher, loving, hopeful... The labels we give to ourselves can powerfully influence our behaviour. In this interview I chat with Brad Yates about the positive and negative identities we create and how we can use tapping to transform the way we see and define ourselves.

There are times when we find ourselves caring for someone who is going through something major, be it a physical or mental issue. We want nothing but the best for our loved one, but we can end up spreading ourselves too thin. We give everything we have to the point that we are harming ourselves. It is important that when we are caring for others that we take the time to also care for ourselves. If we don't take care of ourselves we can't care for others. In this interview I talk to Ron Ball as he shares his personal story of what it is like providing long term care for a loved one and what he learned about taking care of himself during that time.

There is a lot of talk about the idea of what we manifest in our lives, both positive and negative. I personally think that we pay too much attention to manifesting and attracting and give nowhere near enough credit to personal choice and response. In this conversation with my friend Jondi Whitis we talk about what we can control, what we create, and what we are responsible for. This is just one point of view and I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.

Our romantic relationships take up a great deal of our time and energy. They can bring us great joy and great frustration (and sometimes both at the same time). Even though each relationship is a new and different experience we can find ourselves falling into the same patterns. Some repeat themselves from relationship to relationship, whilst others keep repeating themselves inside the same relationship. In this interview with Alina Frank we talk about how we can identify these patterns and how they were created. We also spend time looking at how we can use tapping/EFT to clear the negative patterns in our current relationships and those of repeating the same type of negative relationship experiences.

When I am setting up interviews for the podcast I normally ask my guest, "What is the thing that really gets your juices flowing? It doesn't have to be what you are known for. I want to know what is exciting you right now!" Once we have agreed on a topic the guest sends me a few bullet points to help me to form questions. When I was having this back and forth with Rue Hass she said, "This is something I am really excited about and it is so new to me that I can't even send you an outline." I love getting to be a part of new things! In this interview Rue shares a new technique that she is working with which uses metaphors and having clients draw pictures. It is absolutely brilliant. The technique is simple and elegant and as she was describing it I could see immediately how this could fit into my practice. I know you are going to love this.

A manifesto is nothing more than a statement of beliefs. This is what I believe about the healing process. This is not about tapping the tool, but what happens when we heal and transform. This is how I think when I am working with clients

The history of business is a history about how companies and organizations can be more efficient. Much of this work is about how companies and organizations can create an environment where they can get their employees to be more productive. For most of history this has been about automating processes, educating employees, and learning how to empower employees to make better choice. Today, forward thinking companies like Google and Zappos are starting to look beyond people as cogs in the machine that fill specific tasks, but starting to see them as whole people. When companies feed and support the whole person they are finding their employees are happier, healthier, and more productive. Regardless if you work for someone else, if you employ people, or don't work in a traditional job the lessons about emotional intelligence that these companies are learning can be applied directly to your daily life. In this interview I talk to Paul Zeilzer about what he has learned by visiting companies like Google and Zappos and how they can applied to our daily lives to increase our success.

Many of the practitioners I know are very spiritual people, but for one reason or another they are not connected to a particular denomination or faith tradition. My friend Jake Khym is a different in that regard. He explicitly does Christian counseling. In this conversation we talk about how and why he transitioned from traditional counseling to Christian counseling and how his work now looks different. Also, we spend a great deal of time talking about what it means to provide instruction and teaching in a discipleship relationship vs. what a therapist would normally do. Even if you are not Christian you are going to find this to be a fascinating conversation. Jake is one of the brights and most articulate people I know. His insights in to how people transform and what people are longing for are insightful and will help you with your healing journey regardless how you approach spiritually, faith, or religion.

Let's be honest: Tapping/EFT looks weird when you do it, sounds weird when you explain it, and really is just plain weird. At least once a week as I explaining the work I do and how much I love tapping someone will start to look at me like I have three heads and slowly start creeping away. In any endeavor that we do it is important to have a community of support around us. In these communities we have the opportunity to learn from each other, support each other, and (most importantly) laugh with each other. In the Baltimore area (which is where I live) Steve Carter has done an amazing job in creating just this type of community. The community he has created is from everyone from full time practitioners to people who are just interested in finding way the live health and happier lives. It started very small and over the last few years has not only grown in numbers, but it has also in the quality of support the community provides. For me the only sadness is they normally meet on weekends and I travel 40 weekends a year and haven't had the chance to spend much time with them. In this interview I talk with steve about why he started the group, what he has done to be successful, and lots of practical advice for someone who would like to start something like this in their own community. (And don't worry if you live in a small town or a rural area. Steve has specific advice for your situation.)

From my point of view the opposite of love is not hate, but instead fear. Fear is a very powerful force. It is very primal and is going to over ride most other emotions an thoughts. In this interview I talk with Colleen Flanagan about the many different faces of fear and how it can be at the root of many other issues. We spend a great deal of time talking about 5 distinct types of fear that can be used as lens to understand many of our deeper issues.

Stress is one of the biggest issues of modern life but I think that it is talked about so much that sometimes we tune it out. We need to keep our eye on how stress affects us day-to-day. Tapping for stress is easy to do and is much like brushing your teeth, you need do a little bit daily to make lasting change. In this interview I talk to Louise Woods about the impact of stress on the body and some simple things that you can do right now to improve your mood and your health.

As more time passes few and few people are aware of the roots of tapping as we know it. Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) as presented by Gary Craig build upon the foundations of Thought Field Therapy (TFT). In this interview I chat with Joanne Callahan the co-developer of Thought Field Therapy with her husband Roger Callahan. Joanne has many great insights into not only how Thought Field Therapy came to be created and how we can add the tools and techniques of TFT to our daily tapping. In this conversation we cover the differences between FTF and EFT. We also talk about what psychological reversal is, how toxins affect the healing process, and how we can do something about both right away. We also spend time talking about one of Joanne's passions tapping for trauma (both big and small).

Doing this interview was particularly special to me. My guest Brad Yates was the person who first introduced me to Tapping/EFT. In this spirited conversation we talk about the importance of self-love, the obstacles to loving ourself, and what we can do with tapping to improve our view of ourselves. I know we talk a lot about self love and self acceptance when it comes to tapping. It is right there in the set up phrase, "I love and accept myself." Even with that being the case it is still one of the issues for my clients (and to be honest for myself) that we struggle with most and it is the topic we are least likely to tap for. I firmly believe all healing is rooted in self love and self acceptance. The audio on this podcast is a little rough. I have included a full transcript below because I didn't want you to miss the goodness.

In this podcast my friend Jondi Whitis discuss a bunch of topics around tapping and healing. In the conversation we cover: Being able to be honest about where we really are and why that is paramount to healing. Using where we are to build on knowing where would like to be. How to stay in the moment (which leads to healthier choices). Noticing what is happening emotionally. Is tapping similar to hypnotic induction? Why we resist healing and how can we deal with it. Why tapping doesn't work when I tap on my own. How I can move forward and still feel like I am going backwards. What to do when I don't know what I want. What to do when a client doesn't know how to talk about their emotions. How do I continue to grow my understanding that I am enough.

We all know the EFT mantra, "Try it on everything!" Deborah Miller took this completely to heart. Today she visits a cancer ward five days a week where she has the opportunity to work with children, parents, and even the hospital staff. In this interview she talks about her experience, what she has learned, and her hopes for the future. Even if you don't know someone with cancer and you don't think you will ever work in a hospital setting I encourage you to listen to this interview. There are many specific lessons you can apply to your own daily tapping practice and also in introducing tapping to others.

One of the biggest blocks for beginning tappers is using the setup phrase, "Even though...I love and accept myself." Sometimes we just don't believe it. Sometimes it is painful to think of how we don't love and accept ourselves, and because of this we don't spend time tapping. In this interview I chat with Steve Wells about the idea of self acceptance. During our conversation I quickly came to realize that Steve and I see acceptance and resistance in the same way. We talk about Steve's own (continuing) journey to self acceptance, how he made significant progress using a simple 30-day process, and how moving towards self acceptance heals many other issues in our lives.

"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy." Jerry Seinfeld Fear of public speaking can affect not only large moments when we speak in front of a group of people, but also in the small moments like asking for help at a store. This is how I originally found my way to tapping. I could speak in front of 8,000 people but couldn't ask for help in a store. In this interview I talk with Janet Hilts about how we can use Tapping/EFT for many different aspects of public speaking. We explore how sometimes the issue isn't the speaking itself but aspects around it, and discuss a simple approach that you can use to start tapping for your public speaking fears right away.

In Pod #11: Tapping for Romantic Relationships I talked with Gina Parris about how we can tap to improve our romantic relationships. In this interview we take the next step and talk about how we can use tapping to improve our sexual relationship to reflect the emotional intimacy we share with our partners. It can put a real strain on a relationship when we don't feel truly connected to our partner and often we don't know how to talk about it, or even where to start. In this interview Gina shares practical tips for using tapping to rekindle the passion and fire in relationships.

Back in the fall I asked 10 practitioners that I admire and respect to answer 5 questions about the healing process, the healing journey, and their work with clients. The questions I asked them were: What lessons have you learned about healing from a client? What is something you have changed your mind about when it comes to healing, working with clients, or your own transformation process? If you were to start your own healing journey over again what would you do differently? What is one thing you wish your clients believed about themselves? What is one thing you wish your clients believed about healing process? You can check out their answers in the Round Up Archive Let me know your answers in the comment section below.

This is a slightly different type of podcast. Instead of a straightforward teaching or an interview it is much more a conversation. The topic of the conversation with my friend Jondi Whitis where we talk about using tapping protocols and how we find our ways to core issues. Techniques/Tools v Art of Delivery Simple v Complex Stories about how we chance and how that effects how we chance How we find our ways the right tapping phrases Resistance and the absence of resistance The eraser in my pocket How do we find the core issues better How to get clients to find more information about the issues The power of shutting up and listening (aka the comfortable silence) Choosing the issue to start with Worry v Fear How to talk about issues (esp. with kids)

Today's podcast is an interview with Jesse Jacobs and is little different. I first heard Jesse interviewed by Dan Benjamin on the business show "The Pipeline". Dan was interviewing Jesse about the tea house that he runs in San Francisco. What caught my attention was the last five minutes of the interview in which he started to talk about his use of the power of ritual in creating work that he loves and a life that nourishes him. In this interview we spend a little time talking about how he moved from being a techie to creating a space where people could relax, be at peace, and make real connections with others. The bulk of the interview is spent talking about this idea of ritual, its power, how it can ground us, and how we can add daily ritual to our lives. I find this interview helpful in two ways. First, it opened my eyes to the power of being in the moment (especially when it comes to all the senses). Second, we look at how we can create a daily ritual (like tapping) to create grounding for our day

This is a slightly different type of podcast. Instead of a straightforward teaching or an interview it is much more a conversation. The topic of the conversation with my friend Sue is cravings, eating, and weight release. Because of the nature of conversation we touch on many other things. We talk about: Reasons people have cravings Becoming the observer of our self How to be able to tap when something is happening, not just after the fact Why treat your inner voice like a 5 year old The difference between craving and savoring (lessons in conscious choice) What we can learn (and not learn) from "What Not To Wear" The balance between losing ourselves in our goals and total apathy Why it is good that we struggle with how we look Degrees of pain Trading one craving for another (changing habits v healing wounds) 3 steps to approach every problem

According to U.S. National Library of Medicine at the National Institutes of Health Fibromyalgia is: a common syndrome in which people experience long-term, body-wide pain and tender points in joints, muscles, tendons, and other soft tissues. Fibromyalgia has also been linked to fatigue, sleep problems, headaches, depression, anxiety, and other symptoms. The cause of this disorder is unknown. Although none have been well proven, possible causes or triggers of fibromyalgia include: Physical or emotional trauma An abnormal pain response. Areas in the brain that are responsible for pain may react differently in fibromyalgia patients. Sleep disturbances, which are common in fibromyalgia patients. An infectious microbe, such as a virus. At this point, no such virus or microbe has been identified. The following conditions may be seen with fibromyalgia or mimic its symptoms: Chronic neck or back pain Chronic fatigue syndrome Depression Hypothyroidism Lyme disease Sleep disorders More and more I am seeing clients with these symptoms. In this interview I spend time with EFT Rue Hass talking about her experience with clients who are experiencing symptoms of fibromyalgia. We talk about causes as well things she has seen in her practice that has been helpful for these symptoms

When I approached my friend and fellow practitioner Rod Sherwin about what topic he wanted to talk about in a podcast interview he recommended a conversation about self-compassion. At the time of the interview I was unfamiliar with the word. Self-compassion is in stark contrast to self-esteem. It is all about seeing yourself in the same way as you see others. Often we are supportive and understanding when others fail, but when we fail we are very hard on ourselves. Self-compassion is about being able to extend that same love and understanding towards ourselves. In this interview we explore self-compassion in depth and practical ways in which we can incorporate it into our daily lives and our daily tapping.

There are few things more emotionally charged than money. Often one of the reasons we talk in terms of abundance and success is because we don't even want to say "I want money" or "I want cash" out loud. In this pragmatic interview with Margaret Lynch shares the four areas of money that we can tune into and start clearing issues right away.

We spend a great number of our waking hours at work. Not only do our working hours consume our time but also our emotions and our energy. In this interview with Rick Wilkes we talk about how stress and trauma in our personal and professional lives can affect our ability to be healthy and successful in our work. We talk about ways of discovering how these past traumas are impacting us now and how we can use tapping to clear them, enabling us to be more present in the moment.

One of the biggest challenges of the modern world is being fully present in the moment. Our attention seems constantly to be pulled in a million directions between the media we consume (even if it is just constantly chattering in the background), our loved ones, all the tasks that need to be done during the day, and everything we would like to achieve for our own growth. Being present in this moment is very challenging. In this interview with Ted Robinson we talk about how being present in the moment can benefit us and how we can use tapping to help us to achieve this state.

Tapping is great for physical pain and physical issues. When most people are introduced to tapping they learn to deal with pain by tapping on "this pain in my knee...this pain in my knee...this pain in my knee". In this interview with Carol Look we examine more advanced ways to look at the emotions associated with physical pain and how in many cases when we deal with the emotional issues we find our way to physical relief.

One of the things I love about Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is how flexible the tool set is. Not only is it a great stand-alone tool, but it is something that can be used with lots of other tools. In this interview I talk with Betty Moore-Hafter about the lessons she has learned from other tool sets and how you can easily add them into your own tapping. This is easy stuff that anyone can do.

One of the biggest hang-ups my clients have when tapping on their own is knowing what tune into and how to find past memories or core issues. Tania A Prince has developed a very easy process that only requires the person who is doing Emotional Freedom Techniques to tune into how they know they have the issue. It is really that easy. In this interview Tania explains EFT Inner RePatterning and how to do it.

One of the questions I get the most often into the site is about surrogate tapping. In this interview Gwyneth explains how she came to understand the power of surrogate tapping and a very elegant three step approach that anyone can do any time. Over the course of the interview we talk about surrogate tapping for animals as well as people. We even spend a little time talking about if we need to get permission to tap surrogately for someone else.

Over the past few years I have been lucky enough to get to know Jessica Ortner through a number of projects. She just has a wonderful, joyful spirit. I asked Jessica if she would be willing to be interviewed for the podcast and she was initially a little bit hesitant as she is very good at doing interviews, but being interviewed isn't something she is used to. We talked about how to do interviews and how to do a good job as an interviewee. My favorite part of our talk was exploring some of the lessons and wisdom Jessica has learned from all the great people she has has the opportunity to interview.

Most of the time the problem isn't knowing what we want. Usually the problem is taking the steps that we know we should take to move forward. In these cases there are fears and limiting beliefs that are preventing us from moving forward. In this podcast I share with you a simple 10 step process that will help to uncover the fears and limiting beliefs that are preventing you from having what you want in your life. When you ask these 10 questions your limiting beliefs will quickly present themselves and give you the opportunity to tap them away. For more information on a comprehensive way to use these 10 questions check out 10 Steps To Getting Out Of Your Own Way

Carrying an emotional burden for someone else is a very high act of love, but it can have consequences for our own emotions and health. In this episode we look at how and why we carry burdens for others and past generations, and how we can use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)/tapping to release these burdens.

One of the most powerful tools in transformation is our ability to forgive ourselves and others. When we forgive we are not saying it is ok. We are not saying we want to have the same thing happen again. What we are saying is that we are choosing no longer to be emotionally entangled in the past. Forgiveness is one of the steps of moving from reliving to remembering. In this show we will explore the power of forgiveness and how we can use tapping to make forgiveness of others and ourselves an important part of our transformation.

Gene host's a radio program every other Tuesday @ Emotional Freedom Techniques Community Radio. In the most recent show Gene answered questions from beginners and practitioners alike from all over the world. On this show Gene tackles for bigger questions This week Gene answered: Should I be working with a practitioner and how do I choose one? I have seen some other tapping protocols that don't use the same points that are taught in the EFT manual. Is it okey if I use other tapping points or will this mess things up? I have heard you talk about in the past that you don't trust what a client says about their issue? What do you mean by this and with this in mind how do you work? I want to quit smoking. I tap on "Even though I am a smoke I love and accept myself" This makes me feel a little less stressed about quitting smoking, but I still smoke as much as ever. What can I do?

This week Gene answered: I would like to know is why I just get temporaries results with EFT and tapping ?? and Why I don´t get good results with, self esteem ,fear of rejection, people speaking, failure, procrastination and discipline? I want to tap everyday, but for some reason it doesn't happen. How can I make sure I tap every day? As I do more work I am becoming more and more aware of my inner thoughts. One level this is good because I can see the areas of my life that I want to change, but in other ways it feels bad because I am always noticing it. Is there a way that I can keep from feeling so over whlemed about the amount of work i need to do? Do I have to be seated while tapping or can I do it laying down? My husband and I are having trouble conceiving a child. Can tapping help? I am having a hard time coming up with phrases. Are there any tricks I can use?

One of the conversations I have most often around Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping is how it relates to religious traditions and spiritual practice. The questions range from, “Is it OK to tap based on my religion/belief system?” to “Can tapping help my spiritual practice?” I was interviewed by TapFest host Jondi Whitis and Co-Host Lillian Fimbres on EFT Radio and here is our complete conversation on the subject.

Trauma is one of the words that we throw around when talking about difficult times. In this interview I talk with EFT Master Gwyneth Moss about the true nature of trauma. She very succinctly explains how we experience trauma and how to deal with it. Trauma is not about something that happens, but the after effects, and when we understand its true nature we are much more likely to be able to heal. This is one of those interviews that is worth listening to a number of times.

This week Gene answered: Will tapping right before bed keep you up? Is it possible to tap for things that happen that our subconscious mind is perceiving, but our conscious mind is not? How do I tap for seasonal allergies? How do I tap for Male Pattern Baldness? How do I tap for weight loss?

Our ability to be successful with any task is not dependent just on our skill set, but also our mental frame of mind before, during, and after we take action. This frame of mind can impact not only our ability but also how we learn new tasks and improve our skill. In this podcast I talk to Jared Tendler. Jared works with golfers and poker players around their mindset and frame of mind. Both of these games are great for looking at how our mindset affects us because of the immediate feedback we get from each choice. In this interview Jared talks about many different ways we can look at our mental outlook and how it relates to choice. The experienced tapper will see right away how to combine these mindset approaches with our Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping. This interview is packed with information. There are times when I finish an interview and am just blown away by what I have learned, and this is one of those instances. I recommend listening to the podcast a few times and doing with a pen and paper to hand.

In a number of Gary Craig's original EFT DVDs he talked about how helpful knowing and understanding NLP concepts are. I can speak from my own experience at how valuable these principles, concepts, and techniques are when working with clients or doing self-work. In this pod I interview the National Foundation Of Neuro Linguistic Programming founder Dr. Wil Horton. In this interview we talk about the different logical levels of change. When we recognize all of the different levels in which change can happen at it can speed the healing process as well as identify the places we need to do extra work.

As time passes I am increasingly working with clients on building their own practices. There is a real feeling of "try it on everything" in the Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping community but as we move from helping our friends with headaches and cravings for chocolate to working with clients, we need more than just a willing spirit. In this interview EFT Master Carol Look speaks frankly about two key issues to keep in mind when you are starting a practice.

This week Gene answered: Have been tapping for an issue that has been with me for a while. I am making great progress, but when I tap all sorts of thoughts, memories, and emotions come to mind. All of this information is overwhelming. What do I do with it all? I am new to Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping. Should I be saying the phrases out loud or is it okey to say them in my head? To be honest I feel a little silly saying them out loud. I had a client come in for a issue that they were sure they knew the root cause of, but when they tuned in to the past memory that was causing this issue there is no emotional charge. What should I do? I have a client who has been diagnosed with clinical depression. Where should I start? How do you deal with naysayers? Do we need to tap every issue down to 0? I have been dealing with the emotions of a break-up for months now and feel like I have tried everything. As some one who deal with this a lot I am hoping you have a trick I haven't tried. What should I do? It hurts when I tap on some of the spots but I want relief. Should I keep tapping?

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a powerful tool and can help you to understand where you are standing and help you to make choices to transform your life. NLP and EFT/Tapping are a match made in heaven. More than likely you are already using NLP techniques and don’t even know it.

Most of us who have private practices or want private practices want to spend our time helping our clients. We don't want to spend time marketing. Not because we don't think marketing is important, but because we aren't very good at it or even worse it is scary. In this podcast I talk to Pamela Bruner and we discover that not only do you need to be marketing for your own sake, but for your clients’ sake. We talk about the unique challenges that transformational entrepreneurs face in marketing their products and services. This is a must listen to if you have or would like your own practice.

One of the most powerful insights I have had in my practice in the last 18 months was the recognition that every issue we have is trying to serve us in some way. This does not mean that issue is successful in doing so, in fact often the effect of the issue is to make our life worse rather than better. In podcast I explain an easy 9 step process you can use with Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping to transform your issues into powerful resources for growth.

I often receive questions about how to tap in order to change someone else’s behavior. There are some very specific implementations of surrogate Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping, such as in the work I do with autistic children and their parents. But it is not as simple as tapping to change other people’s choices. We can't tap to change someone else’s free will, but we can tap to create an environment where others have a chance to make new and better choices. In this podcast I explain three ways in which we can help others to make different choices: by working on our own emotions, making others feel loved and safe, and by not bringing our own issues to the table.

We spend up to one half of our waking hours at work. Not only is it important that we have an effective way of dealing with the stress of our jobs, but we also need to help manage the way this stress might affect the rest of our lives. In this interview with Pamela Bruner we talk about how we can use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)/tapping to deal with workplace stress, how to use tapping to improve our performance at work, and how to keep work stress from creeping into other parts of our lives.