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412 episodes — Page 1 of 9

Creating a calmer home: Using design and organization to support your child's nervous system with Rachel Melvald

May 12, 202652 min

Q&A: What should I do when my toddler fights diaper changes and refuses to use the potty?

May 7, 202615 min

How to help your child have a healthier relationship with screens: The psychology behind what actually works with Catherine Price

May 5, 202649 min

Q&A: How do I support my child with language delays during playdates?

Apr 30, 202613 min

Lice explained: How to treat it, stop the spread, and skip the shame, from a registered nurse

Apr 28, 202643 min

Q&A: Why does my child go from being fine to melting down in a matter of seconds?

Apr 23, 202623 min

Divorce with less conflict: Co-parenting, emotion regulation, and supporting your kids with Katherine Miller

Apr 21, 202651 min

Q&A: When and how should I tell my child about his autism diagnosis?

Apr 16, 202624 min

Doulas, birth plans, and anxiety: How to feel more confident and less overwhelmed in pregnancy and postpartum with Sarah Ludwig

Apr 14, 202654 min

Ep 401Q&A: What should I do when my toddler hits or pulls my hair?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... Why the expectation that toddlers should already know how to regulate themselves is a common parenting myth. What's actually happening in a child's brain and body when their emotional "gas tank" is empty. Why your child's big reaction to a limit doesn't mean you've done something wrong. The difference between holding a boundary and trying to solve your child's feelings. What to do when your child's behavior is physically aggressive, like hitting or hair pulling. Why your own triggers matter and how understanding them can help you respond differently. The foundational factors (like sleep, fresh air, movement, and connection) that often drive behavior more than discipline strategies. If you've ever felt powerless, guilty, or overwhelmed in the face of your child's big emotions, this episode will help you zoom out, reset unrealistic expectations, and approach these moments with more clarity and compassion—for both your child and yourself. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the psychology behind dysregulation with founder of Parenting Translator Cara Goodwin 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child is hitting 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using the attachment relationship to help your toddler fall asleep, with Eileen Henry WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Apr 9, 202624 min

Ep 400GLP-1s and parenting: Body image, food noise, and talking to your child about changes to your body with Dr. Rachel Goldman

GLP-1 medications like Ozempic and Wegovy are everywhere right now. But behind the headlines and social media debates are real people navigating complicated questions about body image, health, and how to talk about these changes with their families. Clinical psychologist Dr. Rachel Goldman joins me to unpack the psychology behind GLP-1 medications, the concept of "food noise," and how parents can thoughtfully talk to their children about changes in their own bodies. Together we explore: Why obesity is now understood as a chronic, multifactorial disease rather than a simple issue of willpower. What "food noise" is and why GLP-1 medications can dramatically quiet the constant mental chatter around food. The biggest misconceptions about GLP-1 medications and why they're not simply "weight loss drugs." Why significant body changes can bring up complicated identity and emotional shifts. How parents can talk to kids about weight loss or body changes without reinforcing shame or diet culture. The difference between body positivity and body neutrality and why neutrality may be more realistic and helpful for many families. Small language shifts that help children focus on what their bodies do, rather than how they look. Why it's never too late for parents to shift the way they talk about bodies and health. This conversation will help you understand the science and psychology behind GLP-1 medications and give you practical tools and language to navigate your own health journey and talk about it with your kids in thoughtful, supportive ways. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Dr. Rachel 📚 When Life Happens: The Mindset Shift You Need to Manage Stress, Build Confidence, and Break Free FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@drrachelnyc 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parenting coaching to help you feel more grounded and confident as you support your child's emotional development and navigate challenges like body image, big emotions, anxiety, and family dynamics. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating their effects on body image from early childhood to teen years with Dr. Miriam Steele 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about empowering girls to navigate media, body image, and societal pressures with Dr. Jo-Ann Finkelstein 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about youth sports and body image with Zoë Bisbing

Apr 7, 202647 min

Ep 399Q&A: Are time-ins better than time-outs?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... What a time-in actually is and how it's different from a time-out. How to tell if your child's behavior is coming from dysregulation, a skill gap, or deliberate behavior. How to know which discipline tools will work best in each unique situation. The difference between co-regulating during a meltdown and teaching a behavioral boundary (and how to know when to use each). How to use time-outs as a teaching tool, not a punishment. How developmental stages affect behaviors like hitting, tantrums, and defiance—and what realistic expectations to set. Why trying to find the "perfect parenting script" often makes discipline harder. The one question to ask yourself that will help you decide what to do in the moment. If you've ever found yourself wondering whether you should comfort your child, correct the behavior, or step away entirely, this episode will help you zoom out, understand what's really going on underneath the behavior, and respond more intentionally. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🔗 Longitudinal Relationship Between Time-Out and Child Emotional and Behavioral Functioning 👉 Feeling confused about discipline strategies like time-ins, time-outs, and consequences? Visit drsarahbren.com/timeout to download my ✨FREE✨ Discipline Guide to learn when and how to use these tools in a way that actually supports your child's development while reducing power struggles at home. This guide breaks down how to respond to common behaviors like tantrums, hitting, and defiance so you can feel more confident in the moment. 📚The Tantrum Survival Guide: Tune In to Your Toddler's Mind (and Your Own) to Calm the Craziness and Make Family Fun Again by Rebecca Schrag Hershberg, PhD CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using your child's brain, body and nervous system to guide your parenting Dr. Mona Delahooke 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the psychology behind dysregulation with founder of Parenting Translator Cara Goodwin 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to integrate effective discipline that prioritizes emotional and mental health with Sarah R. Moore WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Apr 2, 202625 min

Ep 398Back by popular demand: Attachment theory and fostering secure attachment relationships

Let's revisit the foundation of raising securely attached kids! I'm bringing back one of my first ever episodes to help parents understand the basics of how a secure attachment bond impacts children's resilience, confidence, and overall well-being. Tune in to hear: What secure attachment is and how it plays a key role in nurturing a child's confidence, curiosity, and ability to handle life's ups and downs. The powerful influence of feeling safe and seen on a child's ability to be honest, adaptable, and resilient. Practical strategies for fostering secure attachment, no matter the age of your child. How attachment affects a child's development into a compassionate, kind individual who can build meaningful relationships throughout their life. This episode offers science-backed insights and actionable tips and is a must-listen for all parents! INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT ATTACHMENT SCIENCE? Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust. LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. SARAH: https://drsarahbren.com/ FOLLOW DR. SARAH ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/drsarahbren/ CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it with Dr. Miriam Steele 🎧 Secure attachment is optimal, but insecure attachment may not be as bad as we think with Dr. Or Dagan 🎧 Can my kid be securely attached to me if I'm insecurely attached in my adult relationships?

Mar 31, 202626 min

Ep 397Q&A: How do I handle sibling rivalry when my baby keeps touching my toddler's toys?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... Whether it's developmentally realistic to expect a baby and a toddler to "work together" during play. If separating siblings in certain moments is helpful parenting… or something we're supposed to avoid. The concept of "territory" in child development and why young children often need spaces and projects that feel protected. Why pushing young children to share too early can sometimes make cooperation harder later on. How helping a toddler trust that their creations and belongings will be respected can actually reduce sibling rivalry over time. The difference between communal family spaces and personal spaces for kids' toys and projects. Simple ways to set boundaries that support both children's needs without turning every moment into a negotiation. Where kids actually learn to get along with siblings — so you can focus on the moments that matter and release some of the pressure around the rest. If you're parenting siblings close in age and feel like you're constantly refereeing fights over toys, this episode will help you better understand what's developmentally normal and give you practical ways to support both children without feeling like you have to force sharing or cooperation before they're ready. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about encouraging sibling empathy without making them responsible for each other's feelings 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your toddler to share 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about soothing your baby and encouraging a closed sibling bond with Dr. Golly WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Mar 26, 202614 min

Ep 396Why kids remember more when they write by hand: What screens might be costing your child's brain with Dr. Audrey van der Meer

Dr. Audrey van der Meer, developmental neuroscientist and Professor of Neuropsychology at NTNU, joins me to talk about what's happening inside our children's brains when they write by hand versus type on a keyboard and what the shift toward fully digital classrooms may be costing their learning, memory, and focus. Together we explore: What gross motor development is and why its sequential nature is so essential for a child's development. The research that illustrated that handwriting activates larger neural networks linked to memory, attention, and deeper learning compared to typing. Why taking notes by hand improves memory retention and comprehension. The "use it or lose it" principle of brain development and what that means for cognitive growth. What studies reveal about reading on paper versus reading on screens. How screens can be beneficial too, so you can make informed, intentional decisions about when to incorporate technology and when to set limits. Practical, realistic ways parents can strengthen brain development at home without banning screens or rejecting technology altogether. This conversation isn't about rejecting technology or going back to the Stone Age. It's about being intentional. And when we understand how the brain evolved to learn, we can make small shifts that serve to strengthen our children's development. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Dr. Audrey van der Meer 🔗NuLab FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@audreyvandermeer 📱@drsarahbren CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of EdTech with Andy Liddell 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to keep your child safe in a world of AI, algorithms, and social media with Imran Ahmed 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting with the "whole-brain" with Dr. Dan Siegel 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte

Mar 24, 20261h 2m

Ep 395Q&A: How can I teach my toddler to clean up their toys without power struggles?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... Why cleanup time can be surprisingly hard for young children. What's really happening in your toddler's brain and body when they are resisting transitions. Is repeating yourself over and over again a normal part of parenting young kids? And how do you know when it's part of the learning process versus something that needs a different approach? How motor planning, executive functioning, and task initiation can make something like "clean up your toys" feel overwhelming to a child. Why you might still be doing 90% of the cleanup work at this age (and why that can actually be part of the learning process.) Practical strategies to make cleanup easier, including breaking tasks into smaller steps, planning ahead for transitions, and using cues like songs and routines. How to shift your expectations so you can stay calm and connected instead of getting pulled into power struggles. If you find yourself repeating the same requests over and over while trying to stay patient and regulated, this episode will help you understand what's developmentally normal for young children and give you practical tools to make cleanup time and transitions feel more manageable for both you and your child. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. 💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 94. Toddler sleep: Why it's different than infant sleep and how to use the attachment relationship to help them fall asleep, with Eileen Henry 🎧 90. Seeing the world through your toddler's eyes: Helping your child feel seen, understood, and validated with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series 🎧 209. How can I get my toddler to share and play nicely with other kids? 🎧231. BTS: How can I build my toddler's assertiveness skills? WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Mar 19, 202625 min

Ep 394Secure attachment and dads: How fathers' inner worlds shape their parenting with Dr. Jett Stone

Dr. Jett Stone, clinical psychologist and author of Quiet Your Mind: A Men's Guide, joins me to talk about paternal mental health and the invisible emotional load modern fathers are carrying, many without language, models, or permission to talk about it. Together we explore: Why millennial dads often feel like they're parenting without a blueprint. How intergenerational patterns and "boyhood rules" shape the way men show up as fathers. Why so many dads feel like the "secondary parent" and how mothers can invite fathers in without diminishing their own needs or experiencing resentment. The tension between wanting authority and wanting connection with your child (and how to hold both). Why secure attachment with dads doesn't have to look exactly like secure attachment with moms. How doing your own reflective work as a parent can transform the entire family system. This conversation will help you understand the emotional lives of fathers with more compassion and clarity. Because when dads feel supported, included, and emotionally resourced, the whole family benefits. Whether you're a parent, a partner, or a therapist working with families, this episode will expand the way you think about modern fatherhood. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Dr. Jett Stone 📚Quiet Your Mind: A Men's Guide: Practical Techniques to Stop Overthinking and Take Charge of Your Life 💻 Psychology Today 🎧 No Man's an Island podcast FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@drjettstone 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉 Looking for extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parent coaching for moms, dads, and families who want to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and support their child's development. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering deep and meaningful relationships with Dr. Rick Hanson 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what it means to be a father with Kendall Smith 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about becoming a team with your partner-in-parenting with Lauren A. Tetenbaum 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering a secure attachment relationship

Mar 17, 202657 min

Ep 393Q&A: Is letting my anxious child sleep in my bed helping or making their anxiety worse?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... Whether letting your anxious child sleep in your bed reinforces anxiety or supports emotional security. The difference between attachment needs and anxiety accommodations. Why distress tolerance and secure attachment are not competing goals. How SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) approaches sleep struggles. What it actually means to "stop an accommodation" — and why sleep isn't always the first place to start. How to know if your child can't sleep alone or simply prefers not to. Why bedtime feels so loaded for parents and how to zoom out and look at the bigger picture. The research on attachment (including why you don't have to get it right 100% of the time). How to reduce anxiety without damaging your relationship with your child. If your child struggles with separation anxiety at night, frequently climbs into your bed, or says he's too scared to sleep alone, this episode will help you step back from the all-or-nothing messaging and make a thoughtful, individualized decision that fits your family. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. 😴 Struggling with toddler bedtime battles? Download my ✨FREE✨ Toddler Sleep Guide with 7 concrete strategies backed by peer-reviewed research and anecdotally tested in my own practice, that you can implement with your children today to turn your bedtime struggles into solutions. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with practical solutions for getting your child to stay in their own bed with Eileen Henry 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode to help you understand the basics of attachment theory and fostering your child's secure attachment bond 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about toddler sleep strategies 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Mar 12, 202626 min

Ep 392The dopamine trap: Why screens and ultra-processed foods keep kids wanting more (but never satisfied) with Michaeleen Doucleff

Michaeleen Doucleff, science journalist and author of Dopamine Kids, joins me to talk about what's really happening in our children's brains when it comes to screens, social media, and ultra-processed foods and why so many kids (and adults) feel stuck in cycles of constant wanting without real satisfaction. Together we explore: What dopamine actually does in the brain and why it's not simply the "pleasure chemical." How screens and ultra-processed foods are engineered to tap into our children's seeking systems. Why today's kids may be experiencing more craving and less true gratification. Why simply taking screens away often backfires and what to replace them with instead. How small, sustainable environmental shifts (not massive overhauls) can recalibrate your child's motivation system. Practical ways to reduce screen use in the evenings, during transitions, and "on the go." How involving your child in the process can increase autonomy, buy-in, and long-term success. This conversation isn't about fear, shame, or unrealistic detoxes. It's about understanding the science of motivation so we can make thoughtful changes that bring more color, pleasure, and peace back into our homes. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Michaeleen Doucleff 📚Dopamine Kids: A Science-Based Plan to Rewire Your Child's Brain and Take Back Your Family in the Age of Screens and Ultraprocessed Foods LEARN MORE ABOUT MY ME: 🔗 Dr. Sarah Bren 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Dr. Kent Berridge 🔗 Dr. Wolfram Schultz 📚 Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg, PhD 📄 From Tobacco to Ultraprocessed Food: How Industry Engineering Fuels the Epidemic of Preventable Disease 🔗 Read Montague, Ph.D. 📄 Sign‐tracking modulates reward‐related neural activation to reward cues, but not reward feedback 🔗​​ Brick 👉 Whether it's screens, power struggles, reactivity, or habits that are hard to shift, it can be incredibly difficult to see and change these cycles on your own. Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers in-person and virtual therapy and parent coaching to help you create meaningful, lasting change. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the neuroscience of raising emotionally resilient kids with Dr. Kristen Lindquist 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating tantrums, big feelings, screen time and more with Dr. Laura Markham 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about reclaiming your focus and navigating distractions and screen time to become more present with Nir Eyal 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about stress, screens, shifting hormones, and early puberty with Dr. Sheryl Ziegler

Mar 10, 20261h 5m

Ep 391Q&A: Should I redshirt my child for kindergarten?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... What "kindergarten readiness" actually means (and what it doesn't). Dr. Upshur and Dr. Bren share their personal experiences - with one choosing to send her child to kindergarten and the other deciding to hold her son back - and why. The pros and cons of redshirting, and whether being one of the youngest in the class really leads to long-term struggles. Why social-emotional readiness may matter less than you think. How family logistics, finances, community norms, local school culture, and sibling dynamics can influence your decision. What research says about long-term academic and life outcomes. How to take the pressure off yourself so you can make a thoughtful, "good enough" choice. If you're going back and forth about whether to send your child to kindergarten or wait another year, wondering if they're too sensitive or overwhelmed to start, or worried about making the "wrong" decision, this episode will help you zoom out, gather the right information, and move forward with more clarity and confidence. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping kids cope with stress and become self-driven with Dr. William Stixrud 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child success in preschool with Meredith Gary 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your toddler learn to share WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Mar 5, 202618 min

Ep 390Parenting toddlers through power struggles: How to set limits, support independence, and reduce meltdowns with Devon Kuntzman

Devon Kuntzman, toddler expert and author of Transforming Toddlerhood, joins me to explain why the toddler years feel so intense and how understanding development can change everything. Together we explore: How toddlerhood is defined by contradictory needs for independence and attachment and why this creates so much emotional volatility. How rapid cognitive, motor, and language development can leave toddlers feeling disoriented and overwhelmed. How to slow down power struggles using developmentally informed tools like asking "What's your plan?" and turning "no" into "not yet." Why helping toddlers organize their thinking supports regulation, impulse control, and cooperation. How parents can stay flexible, grounded, and confident while navigating a stage that naturally pushes everyone's limits. How to grab your free spot in Devon's 9th Annual Transforming Toddlerhood Conference being held live virtually from March 11th-15th. This episode is designed to help parents make sense of toddler behavior through a developmental lens, reduce self-blame, and walk away with practical strategies for setting limits while still supporting independence, emotional growth, and secure attachment. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Transforming Toddlerhood 🔗 Reserve your FREE spot in the Transforming Toddlerhood Conference 🎧Listen to Devon's first Securely Attached podcast episode about how to effectively set limits, stay calm, and parent with confidence in toddlerhood 📚 Transforming Toddlerhood: How to Handle Tantrums, End Power Struggles, and Raise Resilient Kids—Without Losing Your Mind FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@transformingtoddlerhood 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 94. Toddler sleep: Why it's different than infant sleep and how to use the attachment relationship to help them fall asleep, with Eileen Henry 🎧 90. Seeing the world through your toddler's eyes: Helping your child feel seen, understood, and validated with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series 🎧 209. How can I get my toddler to share and play nicely with other kids? 🎧231. BTS: How can I build my toddler's assertiveness skills?

Mar 3, 202638 min

Ep 389Q&A: Is it okay to have different rules for different kids in a blended family?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - Whether it's okay to have different rules for different kids under the same roof in a blended family. - How developmental differences and co-parenting agreements can shape household expectations. - What to do when step-siblings notice (and protest) differences in discipline. - How to align parenting styles in a blended family without creating resentment. - Why transparency and age-appropriate conversations can actually strengthen family trust. - How to approach your spouse when you feel protective, defensive, or out of sync. If you're navigating parenting post-divorce in a blended family with different parenting plans and complex co-parenting relationships, struggling with fairness between step-siblings, or feeling unsure how to handle different rules in the same house, this episode offers clarity, nuance, and practical next steps. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉🏻 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best way to approach introducing your kids to your new significant other after a divorce 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode answering a mom who wondered if there was something she can do to strengthen her child's relationship with her ex 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about getting on the same page with your partner in parenthood WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Feb 26, 202617 min

Ep 388AI, algorithms, and social media: How to protect your child from digital harm and advocate for change with Imran Ahmed

Imran Ahmed, founder and CEO of the Center for Countering Digital Hate, joins me to talk about how social media platforms, algorithms, and AI systems are designed and what that means for our children's mental health and safety. Together we explore: How social media algorithms are built to maximize attention, and why emotionally extreme content is often amplified. What research reveals about how quickly self-harm and eating disorder content can be served to young users. How AI platforms can respond dangerously to vulnerable teens when guardrails are not properly in place. Why this is not just a "screen time" issue, but a systemic design and accountability issue. The difference between pulling the "emergency brake" and creating meaningful long-term change. What parents can realistically do at home to build digital resilience, foster trust, and partner with their children in navigating online spaces. This episode isn't meant to create more fear, but to offer greater clarity. My hope is that parents walk away feeling informed, empowered, and better equipped to both advocate for safer systems and strengthen the relationship that ultimately protects kids most: the one they have with you. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Center for Countering Digital Hate FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱IG: @counterhate FB: Center for Countering Digital Hate Youtube: @CCDHate 📱IG: @drsarahbren Youtube: Securely Attached ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 💻 Protecting Kids Online - Download the guide for parents 🔗 Deadly by Design: TikTok pushes harmful content promoting eating disorders and self-harm into young users' feeds 🔗 Fake Friend: How ChatGPT betrays vulnerable teens by encouraging dangerous behavior 🔗 Resist and unsubscribe - Scott Galloway 👉 Parenting in the age of AI, algorithms, and constant connectivity can feel like a lot. If you're feeling unsure, reactive, or overwhelmed, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parent coaching to help you feel grounded, clear, and confident as you support your child and manage your own stress. Schedule a free 30-minute consultation or go to upshurbren.com to learn more and find the right support for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about secure attachment vs. social media with Dr. Miriam Steele 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the do's and don'ts for introducing screens to your toddler 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of EdTech with Andy Liddell 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte

Feb 24, 20261h 4m

Ep 387Q&A: My child was left out by her friends. Now what?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... First things first, why are schools still sending out candy grams in this current climate with a loneliness epidemic on the rise? Cliques and posses that form in middle school are often rife with envy, jealousy, gossip, and temptation - how to help our kids navigate this. What advice to give your child when they are left out in a friend group. How to help a child who tends to avoid conflict in their interpersonal relationships build a greater tolerance for joining in and addressing things directly. "There is a difference between a kid who says 'I am going to let this go' vs. 'I am going to hold this in.'" Understanding "social currency" and how that impacts children, especially as they move into the stage of development where their attention begins to move away from their parents and much more heavily toward their peers. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about talking with your teen with Elizabeth Bennett 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about respond to your child who you think is bullying other kids 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about social media's impact on your child's attachment security with Dr. Miriam Steele WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Feb 19, 202624 min

Ep 386PANS and PANDAS explained: Why some children develop sudden OCD, anxiety, or tics after illness with Dr. Nancy O'Hara

Dr. Nancy O'Hara, pediatrician and leading expert in PANS and PANDAS, joins me to unpack why some children experience sudden, dramatic changes in behavior, anxiety, OCD, tics, sleep, or emotional regulation following illness. For many families, these symptoms appear almost overnight and are often misdiagnosed as "just anxiety," behavioral issues, or psychiatric disorders, leaving parents confused, dismissed, and unsure how to help their child. Together we explore: What PANS and PANDAS are, and how infections like strep, viruses, or tick-borne illness can trigger sudden neuropsychiatric symptoms in children. What to assess to help you determine if your child has a generalized anxiety disorder or if it may be PANS/PANDAS that is the root cause of their symptoms. Why PANS/PANDAS is often missed or misunderstood in both medical and mental health settings. The three-pronged approach to treatment: Addressing the trigger, the immune system, and the child's emotional and behavioral symptoms. How therapy, both for parents and children, can support recovery, even when symptoms have a medical origin. Understanding that there is real hope for healing and that it's never too late to identify and address PANS or PANDAS. This episode is designed to help parents and clinicians feel more informed, less alone, and more confident in recognizing when a child's behavior may be signaling something deeper. PANS and PANDAS are real, treatable conditions that deserve compassionate, comprehensive care. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Dr. Nancy O'Hara 📚Demystifying PANS/PANDAS: A Functional Medicine Desktop Reference on Basal Ganglia Encephalitis 🎧 Demystifying PANS/PANDAS Podcast FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱IG: @nhoharamd FB: Nancy O'Hara MD, MPH, FAAP 📱IG: @drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety or OCD? If your child is struggling with anxiety or OCD, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers SPACE-based parent support through both a virtual group and individualized care. Go to upshurbren.com/space to learn more or book a free 30-minute consultation with our care team, who will listen carefully and help you determine the best support for your family. 🔗 Dr. O'Hara's mentor, Sidney M. Baker, MD 🔗 Susan Swedo, MD, who created the acronym and coined the terms of PANS and PANDAS 📚 Super Sam and the Battle Against PANS/PANDAS by Dr. Lindsey Wells 🔗 Practitioner directories and community support: Aspire and Look Foundation 🔗 For practitioners: PANDAS Physicians Network 🔗 A helpful resource you can bring to your pediatrician: The Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry - February 2017 📚 The Comprehensive Physicians' Guide to the Management of PANS and PANDAS: An Evidence-Based Approach to Diagnosis, Testing, and Effective Treatment by Dr. Scott Antoine 🔗 Autism and PANS PANDAS 🔗 The Medical Academy of Pediatrics and Special Needs 🔗 Ilads 🔗 Psychiatry Redefined CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how mold, Lyme, pesticides, and other toxins may be impacting your child's physical and mental health with integrative pediatrician Dr. Pejman Katiraei 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle potty regressions in your older child? 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) can be an effective treatment for childhood anxiety and OCD 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to help autistic kids build joy, confidence, and connection with Dr. Peter Vermeulen

Feb 17, 202651 min

Ep 385Q&A: How can I encourage sibling empathy without making them responsible for each other's feelings?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... The subtle but important difference between encouraging empathy and unintentionally parentifying a child. What reflective functioning is and why helping your child develop this skill may be one of the most important things you can do as a parent. What helps empathy develop naturally in children without pressure or responsibility. Ways to navigate mismatched messages from extended family while staying grounded in your own parenting values. What parents can do to foster healthy sibling dynamics. If you have ever worried about asking too much of your older child, felt activated by comments about siblings taking care of each other, or wondered how to support healthy sibling relationships without repeating old patterns, this episode offers clarity, nuance, and a calmer way forward. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why your kids fight and how to foster closeness with Dr. Jonathan Caspi 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about sibling rivalry and jealousy 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about breaking the cycle of insecure attachment with Dr. Miriam Steele WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or

Feb 12, 202619 min

Ep 384Why parenting can shake up your marriage: How to fight better, repair faster, and stay connected with Eli Weinstein

Eli Weinstein, couples therapist and author of the upcoming book From I Do to We Do: Navigating Marriage in Parenting Years, joins me to talk about what really happens to a relationship after kids. Together we explore: - Why parenthood doesn't just add stress, it reactivates attachment patterns and old wounds in both partners. - What's really happening when you keep having the same fight on repeat, and how to begin spotting the deeper need beneath it. - How mental load, feeling unseen, and constant "downloading" logistics quietly erode connection and build resentment. - The difference between "we made up" and actually repairing what keeps breaking. - How couples get stuck in "gridlock arguments" and what helps uncover what's really driving the conflict. - The role overstimulation and nervous system overload play in reactivity at home. - Practical ways couples can reset and regrow in this new season, without waiting for more time, sleep, or perfect circumstances This episode is designed to help you feel less alone in the mess of marriage after kids, and more confident about what actually helps couples stay connected, communicate better, and find their way back to each other. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Eli Weinstein 📚From I Do to We Do: Navigating Marriage in the Parenting Years 🎧The Dude Therapist Podcast 🎧 Listen to Eli's last Securely Attached episode about busting parenting gender stereotypes with Eli Weinstein FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@eliweinstein_lcsw 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Want to learn more about therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services for individuals, couples, parents and kids and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how secure attachment influences children's ability to make sense of their experiences and cope in the face of adversity with Dr. Alan Sroufe 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about codependency, insecure attachment, and relationship patterns with Alana Carvalho 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether your child can be securely attached to you if you are insecurely attached in your adult relationships

Feb 10, 202649 min

Ep 383Q&A: Can you spoil a toddler by holding them too much?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - Why so many parents start questioning their instincts around holding and comforting as their baby becomes a toddler. - How to tell when your child truly needs comfort versus when they may be ready for a small, supportive stretch. - What increased clinginess may be communicating and how decoding the root cause can guide what to do next. - Why soothing and physical closeness do not undermine independence and often play a key role in helping it develop. - How to move away from rigid parenting rules and make moment-to-moment decisions rooted in attunement and nervous system cues. - What it looks like to honor your own limits without making your child feel unsafe, rejected, or "too much." If you have ever wondered whether you are helping or hurting your child by picking them up, holding them, or setting boundaries around your availability, this episode will help you navigate those moments with more confidence. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🔗 Donald Winicott 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about confidently parenting your toddler with Transforming Toddlerhood's Devon Kuntzman 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about toddler sleep with Eileen Henry 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about Helping your child feel seen, understood, and validated with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Feb 5, 202620 min

Ep 382Why good moms feel bad (and how to stop letting your emotions run the show) with Rebecca Geshuri

Rebecca Geshuri, therapist and co-author of the new book When Good Moms Feel Bad joins me to talk about why so many "good moms" still feel overwhelmed, reactive, or stuck in cycles of guilt, anger, and self-criticism. Together we explore: - Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Rebecca breaks down what "parts work" is and how understanding your inner parts can reduce reactivity and shame. - How polarization between "what my child needs" and "what I need" fuels burnout and emotional overwhelm. - Why parenting feels hardest when younger, protective parts take over. - What the "inner mom" is and how learning to access this part of yourself builds calm, confidence, and connection. - A simple framework to slow down in triggering moments and respond with more compassion. - How self-compassion and nervous system awareness support secure attachment — for both you and your child. If you've been feeling overwhelmed and burnt out in parenthood, this episode offers validation, language for what you're experiencing, and practical tools to help you feel more grounded, regulated, and connected. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Rebecca Geshuri 🔗 Second Street Collective 📚 When Good Moms Feel Bad: An Empowering Guide for Transforming Guilt, Anxiety, and Anger into Compassion, Confidence, and Connectedness 🎧 Listen to Rebecca's first Securely Attached interview about her approach combining Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy with maternal mental health LEARN MORE ABOUT ME: 🔗 drsarahbren.com 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Want to learn more about therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why specialized mental healthcare providers matter with Rebecca Geshuri and Paige Bellenbaum 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode to help you learn to lighten the load in pregnancy and parenthood with Dr. Sterling 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of mom-rage Diana Winston 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode exploration of healing trauma through presence, connection, and self-awareness with Dr. Jacob Ham 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi

Feb 3, 202653 min

Ep 381Q&A: What is body doubling and how can it help my child with ADHD focus?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - What body doubling actually is and why your child may focus better simply because someone is nearby. - Why getting started on tasks (homework, getting dressed, chores) is often harder than the task itself for kids with ADHD. - How to be intentional about helping reduce procrastination, distraction, and emotional overwhelm for your child. - How to use body doubling in ways that build independence over time, instead of creating power struggles or burnout. - Real-life, low-effort examples of body doubling that don't require special systems, tutors, or more on your plate. If your child struggles to get started, loses focus easily, or can only seem to work when someone is sitting with them, this episode offers a strategy to support them in a way that feels sustainable and actually works. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉🏻 Interested in learning more about Upshur Bren Psychology Group's Parenting Your Child with ADHD 8-week virtual workshop series to empower parents of children, adolescents, and young adults with ADHD? Go to upshurbren.com/group-adhd or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about with real-life strategies for parenting a child with ADHD with Dr. Eliza Barach 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how can I get my child with ADHD go from one activity to the next without a fight? 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can prepare for an IEP or 504 meeting after my child receives an ADHD diagnosis 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can help your child utilize school supports without feeling embarrassed or self-conscious WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Jan 29, 202620 min

Ep 380Orchid and dandelion children: How sensitivity shapes children's health, behavior, and resilience with Dr. W. Thomas Boyce

Dr. W. Thomas Boyce, author of The Orchid and the Dandelion, joins me to talk about why some children are biologically more sensitive to their environments and how that sensitivity can become either a challenge or a powerful strength. Together we explore: - What it means to have either an orchid or a dandelion child and why this exists on a spectrum rather than as a strict either-or. - Why sensitive children often struggle the most in stressful environments and thrive the most in supportive ones. - How nervous system reactivity and regulation show up differently across kids and what that means for how you parent. - The difference between sensitivity and fragility and why sensitive kids can be incredibly resilient when the right supports are in place. - How parents can support orchid children without overprotecting or pushing them too hard. This episode is designed to help parents better understand their child's sensitivity, feel less afraid of getting it wrong, and walk away with a clearer sense of how to support their child in a way that builds resilience, confidence, and long-term emotional health. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 📚The Orchid and the Dandelion FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@theorchidandthedandelion 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉 Want to get my research-backed framework for increasing cooperation and emotion regulation skills in your sensitive child? Check out Parenting by Design, my guided program to help you parent your unique child in a way that increases cooperation, defuses power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a sensitive, "spicy," highly emotional child 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about temperament and personality with Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about preventing burnout when you're the parent of a highly sensitive child

Jan 27, 202655 min

Ep 379Q&A: How can I support my child who struggles with perfectionism?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - How to understand what is really happening when a young child becomes intensely frustrated or self critical. - Why perfectionistic behaviors in early childhood are often developmentally normal and when they may begin to impact confidence or emotional well being. - What to do in the moment when your child is dysregulated and why reassurance, praise, or growth mindset language often does not land when emotions are running high. - How staying curious about your child's negative self talk can actually support resilience and self awareness over time. - Ways to protect your child's inner voice and self esteem without trying to rush her out of uncomfortable feelings. If your child gets stuck in frustration, takes mistakes personally, or is hard on themself, this episode will help you learn how to support their long term emotional growth. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Self-compassion, critical thinking, and connection: What the research reveals about raising capable kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Secure attachment and growth mindset: The science behind raising well-adjusted kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Helping sensitive kids build self-esteem and get out of a cycle of self-criticism with Dr. Blaise Aguirre 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Jan 22, 202621 min

Ep 378Why mothers need to be held too: Somatic work and the circle of nurture with Lisa Rombach

Somatic practitioner and founder of Circle of Nurture, Lisa Rombach, joins me for a deeply grounding conversation about motherhood, the nervous system, and why mothers need support just as much as the children they care for. Together, we explore: - What somatic work actually is, in everyday language, and why it's not as abstract as it may sound. - How motherhood changes our relationship with our bodies and sense of self. - Why self-care often falls short and what truly helps mothers feel replenished. - The role of community, presence, and being witnessed in reducing burnout. - How being held and supported as a mother quietly shapes how our children feel safe and secure. This episode will help mothers feel less alone, more understood, and more grounded in their own experience. You don't need to fix yourself or try harder, sometimes the most powerful shift comes from being supported and held. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Circle of Nurture 🔗 Register for Lisa's live master class: Mother Glue 🔗 Join the next online Mother's Circle FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@circleofnurture 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs. 🔗 Feldenkrais Method 🔗 Somatic Experiencing (SE™) from Dr. Peter A. Levine 🔗 Kimberly Ann Johnson 🔗 Mother Circle: Mothering through adoption 🔗 Lucy Rowett 🔗 The Mother Circle CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my episode on parental burnout: What it is, why it happens, and how to overcome it 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how tuning into your child's natural rhythms can completely transform the way you understand their emotions and reactions with somatic therapist Alé Duarte 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using Internal Family Systems to emotionally support mothers with Rebecca Geshuri and Jessica Sorci

Jan 20, 202654 min

Ep 377Q&A: What should I do when my child lies?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - Whether lying is a normal part of child development or a sign of a deeper issue. - What kids are actually trying to solve when they lie and how understanding that can change the way we respond as parents. - How lying can function as a stress response, similar to fight, flight, or freeze, especially for kids with still-developing executive functioning skills. - Why pushing for confessions, lectures, or punishments often backfires, leading to more power struggles and less honesty — and what to say in the moment instead. - How to teach honesty over time without making your child feel unsafe bringing you the big stuff later on. If your child has started lying and you find yourself wondering whether this is "normal," whether you should be worried, or how to handle it without condoning the behavior, this episode will help you respond with more calm, clarity, and confidence. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🗞️ Fight, Flight, Freeze… or Fib? ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether encouraging imagination will lead to lying in the future 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about getting your child to cooperate without using threats 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why parenting 6-12 year olds is more important now than ever with Dr. Sheryl Ziegler WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Jan 15, 202627 min

Ep 376How to build a family culture of play: Raising self-directed kids who play independently with Lizzie Assa

Independent play expert Lizzie Assa is back on Securely Attached to talk about how play is one of the most powerful ways children can build confidence, creativity, frustration tolerance, and resilience (while parents get a little breathing room back too.) Together we explore: - What independent play actually looks like for kids of all ages and what is realistic at each stage. - Why independent play does not just happen, and how parents can teach it without guilt or power struggles. - How to create simple "play pockets" in your home that make independent play more likely. - Signs your child may have too many toys and why toy overload can shut play down. - Specific phrases, routines, and timing cues that make independent play more successful. - How to decode what your child's play reveals about their emotional experience and where they might need extra support. - How independent play might look different for only children versus those playing with siblings. This episode is designed to leave you with specific ideas you can put into practice immediately, from how to set up play to what to say when you step back, so independent play becomes something that actually works in your day-to-day life. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 The Workspace for Children 🔗 Substack - The Workplace for Children 📚 But I'm Bored!: Discover the Power of Independent Play to Raise Confident, Resilient Kids 🎧 Listen to Lizzie's first interview on the Securely Attached podcast FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@theworkspaceforchildren 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages! CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best toys to encourage independent play 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether fun is the antidote to burnout with Mike Rucker 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode answering if there is a wrong way to encourage independent play 🎧Listen to podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin

Jan 13, 202656 min

Ep 375Q&A: How can I teach my sensitive child to cope with teasing?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - Why some children are more sensitive to teasing, how temperament plays a role, and why those kids are often more likely to be targeted by peers. - How all three hosts, as therapists and parents of sensitive boys, handle teasing and social stress with their own children, including what has helped and what we had to learn the hard way. - What kids mean when they talk about "rage baiting," how this behavior shows up in friendships, and why it is especially dysregulating for sensitive children. - Whether a "toughen up" approach ever helps sensitive kids, and what Dr. Sarah learned when her husband's advice to their son worked better than her own. - How children can learn coping skills for teasing, including when to walk away, when it might be okay to engage, and how to tell the difference. If your child takes teasing to heart and you worry about how to help without minimizing their feelings, this episode will help you support your sensitive child with more confidence, clarity, and connection. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about raising sensitive, "spicy," or highly emotional children 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating peer rejection in early adolescence WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Jan 8, 202629 min

Ep 374Reclaiming your focus: Distraction, screen time, and becoming more present with Nir Eyal

Author of Indistractable, Nir Eyal, is here to reshape the way we think about attention, willpower, and the forces that pull our minds in a thousand different directions. Together we explore: - The surprising science showing that internal triggers (not technology) drive most of our daily distractions. - How stress, boredom, overwhelm, and discomfort quietly shape our habits (and our kids'). - Nir's simple 4-step framework for becoming "indistractable." - What parents can do to model healthy tech habits without constant nagging, power struggles, or guilt. - How to help kids build executive functioning skills like focus, follow-through, and frustration tolerance. - A scheduling hack families can use to reduce battles and increase connection. - The small mindset shifts that turn everyday moments of distraction into opportunities for growth. If you've ever found yourself checking your phone without thinking, losing time to endless tasks, struggling to stay present with your child, or worrying about how screens are affecting your family, this episode offers clarity, practical tools, and a completely new way to approach focus and intentionality — for both you and your kids. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Nir Eyal 📚 Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life 📚 Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱X: @nireyal & LinkedIn: Nir Eyal 📱IG: @drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉🏻 Are you interested in exploring executive functioning supports? At Upshur Bren Psychology Group we offer a wide range of options, including in-person services for kids who live locally and virtual coaching support for those nationally. SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best response to kids who constantly say, "I'm bored"?

Jan 6, 202659 min

Ep 373Q&A: Is it normal for my toddler to want to wear the same outfit every day?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - Why toddlers often get intensely attached to a single outfit and why this kind of rigidity is usually a totally normal part of development. - How to understand the difference between a sensory preference, a sensory processing challenge, and everyday toddler stubbornness. - What "system load" is and why kids become more rigid when they are navigating stress, transitions, or big developmental leaps. - How to reduce morning battles by planning ahead, building flexibility skills, and getting curious about what is really driving your child's resistance. - What to do on the days when nothing works, including how to ride out meltdowns with less guilt and more grounded presence. If you are struggling with daily clothing standoffs or wondering whether your child's rigidity means something is wrong, this episode will help you make sense of what is developmentally typical, when to consider sensory support, and how to navigate tough moments with more confidence and clarity. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your toddler with Devon Kuntzman 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on how to mindfully parent a threenager 🎧 Listen to my podcast on understanding your child's sensory processing experiences with The OT Butterfly Laura Petix 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on strengthening your child's distress tolerance WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Jan 1, 202626 min

Ep 372Mom guilt, good guilt, and letting go: How to tell when guilt is helping you (and when it's holding you back) with Dr. Saumya Dave

Dr. Saumya Dave, psychiatrist, mental health advocate, and author of the new novel The Guilt Pill, joins me this week for a conversation about the emotional load so many mothers carry that can shape our choices, our identity, and even how we see ourselves as parents. Together we explore: - The surprising truth that guilt isn't always bad and how to recognize when it's actually trying to tell you something important. - How cultural expectations and "good girl" conditioning quietly shape the way mothers judge themselves, often without realizing it. - What happens when we try to shut off difficult emotions, and why numbing guilt can create more challenges than it solves. - Why Dr. Saumya chose fiction to explore the emotional undercurrents of motherhood and how storytelling reveals truths we rarely say out loud. - What kids learn from the way we relate to guilt and how parents can model a healthier, more grounded approach. - Small shifts that can loosen guilt's grip and help you reconnect with the messy, joyful moments right in front of you. If you've ever felt weighed down by the pressure to be a "perfect" parent, struggled with the inner critic that tells you you're not doing enough, or simply want a deeper understanding of where mom guilt comes from and how to soften its impact, this episode will give you clarity, validation, and tools to support your emotional wellbeing. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Saumya Dave 📚 The Guilt Pill: A Psychological Thriller of Motherhood and Ambition FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@saumyajdave 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs. 📚 To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode fighting against the pressure to be perfect with Gayane Aramyan 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether one mom's guilt over being a working mom is hurting her parenting 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how mentally strong people handle life's up's and downs with Amy Morin

Dec 30, 202538 min

Ep 371Q&A: I'm worried no one will come to my child's birthday party. What do I do?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... - Why the fear that no one will come to your child's birthday party feels so intense for parents and why that reaction is rooted in real neuroscience. - Ways to ground yourself so you can support your child with clarity instead of panic. - Strategies for planning a birthday celebration that feels safe, joyful, and truly right for your child, whether that means a small gathering, a special outing, or something completely different. - How to partner with teachers, other parents, and your community to help your child form more meaningful connections. - What to do if disappointment still happens and how to validate your child's feelings without getting stuck in them. If you are worried about your child feeling left out, this episode will help you navigate those moments with more confidence so you can show up with grounded support and help your child feel understood and connected. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🎧 Why birthdays are so hard for your kid and what parents can do about it 🎧 Listen to my podcast interview with Dr. Yael Schonbrun 👉🏻Why the brain registers the pain of social rejection the same way as physical pain CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle peer rejection in toddlerhood 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about peer rejection in early adolescence 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachment in peer relationships with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Dec 25, 202518 min

Ep 370Is America's achievement culture fueling a mental health crisis in our kids? With Dr. Doug Bolton

Clinical psychologist, educational leader, and author of Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation, Dr. Doug Bolton, joins me this week to unpack the rising levels of anxiety, burnout, and overwhelm we're seeing in kids today. Together we explore: - How changes in education starting in the 90s have intensified academic pressure for kids of all ages. - Why school avoidance, perfectionism, and burnout are rising, even among high-achieving students. - The neuroscience behind why rigor, overscheduling, and constant output make it harder for kids to access curiosity, regulation, and real learning. - How expectations have shifted, and why many kids simply aren't developmentally ready for what schools now demand. - Realistic, achievable ways to build rest, connection, and resilience into daily family life. - Small shifts parents can make at home to buffer their child's stress, protect their mental health, and restore balance. If your child is melting down after school, anxious about grades, overwhelmed by homework, or feeling weighed down by pressure to perform, this episode will help you understand what's really going on beneath the surface and give you practical tools to support their wellbeing. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Dr. Doug Bolton 📚Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools, and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@douglasabolton 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 If your child is feeling overwhelmed by school demands, struggling with executive functioning, or showing signs of anxiety or burnout, you don't have to navigate this alone. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about our therapy and coaching services designed to help kids and families move through these challenges with clarity and support. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the dangers of an achievement centric approach with Jennifer Breheny Wallace 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child feel less academic pressure 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle school refusal 🎧 Listen to podcast episode about the myths of learning styles with Dr. Dan Willingham 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the neuroscience of why boys and girls need different things with Michael Gurian

Dec 23, 202559 min

Ep 369Q&A: How do I get my 3-year-old to stop crying over everything?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - What is actually happening when your toddler cries over every little thing, from dropped toys to leaving the playground. - Why saying "don't cry" often backfires, and what actually helps shorten the crying instead. - The simple validation strategy that calms big feelings faster, even when every part of you wants the tears to stop. - How to model emotional regulation by moving forward without ignoring your child or shutting their feelings down. - When to offer empathy, when to add a little distraction (and why the order you do this really matters!) for helping toddlers build resilience. If your child seems to dissolve into tears at the smallest frustration, this episode will help you understand the developmental reasons behind all that emotion and give you practical, real-world tools for supporting their feelings while still keeping your day moving. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages! CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about helping parents decipher whether you have a child who is anxious or just sensitive 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about understanding toddlerhood with Devon Kuntzman 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about supporting your toddler's sleep with Eileen Henry WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Dec 18, 202516 min

Ep 368Settling your unsettled baby: How to read your child's cues, build routines, and trust your instincts with pediatrician Dr. Golly

Pediatrician and bestselling author Dr. Golly (aka Dr. Daniel Golshevsky) joins me this week to help new parents make sense of the early weeks with a newborn and feel more grounded, confident, and connected along the way. Together we explore: - How to understand newborn behavior and cues so you can respond with more confidence. - What really matters in the first four weeks — and what you can let go of. - Why some babies struggle to settle, and how to support their developing nervous system. - How to create flexible, supportive routines without slipping into rigidity or pressure. - The powerful role of partners and non-breastfeeding caregivers in bonding and soothing. - How parents can tune out the noise, trust their instincts, and feel less overwhelmed by conflicting advice. Whether you're navigating confusing cues, unpredictable sleep, feeding challenges, colic, or the general overwhelm of early parenthood, this episode offers clarity and reassurance during one of the most intense transitions of your life. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Learn more about Dr. Golly and use code securelyattachedVIP15 for 15% off all Dr Golly courses at www.drgolly.com 🔗Get Dr. Golly's free Sleeping Tips checklists 📚Your Baby Doesn't Come with a Book: Dr Golly's Guide to the First Four Weeks of Parenthood 📚Dr Golly's Guide to Family Illness: Sneezes, Wheezes and Common Diseases 📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Do You Need?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book 📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Did You Say?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱@drgolly 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Go to drsarahbren.com/secure to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust. WANT TO TAKE YOUR LEARNING EVEN FURTHER? Join me in The Authentic Parent, my comprehensive self-paced course that takes my workshop to the next level and teaches you everything you need to know (that no one tells you ahead of time) for how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about lightening the load in pregnancy and parenthood with Dr. Sterling 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with a realistic look at postpartum and early parenthood with Dr. Jessica Vernon 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about movement in pregnancy and postpartum with Dr. Megan Roche 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how "mom-brain" can be our greatest strength with Dr. Nicole Pensak

Dec 16, 202553 min

Ep 367Q&A: How to know if group therapy would be a good fit for my child?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - What actually happens in a group therapy session for kids and how it differs from one-on-one therapy. - How group therapy can help children practice social skills, build confidence, and feel less alone in their struggles. - The fears many parents have about group therapy, including concerns about negative peer influence, comparison, or awkwardness. - The different types of groups therapists run, including skills-based groups, process groups, and hybrid formats, and how to know which one fits your child best. - Why peer support can be uniquely powerful for kids with anxiety or low self-esteem and how group leaders create a safe, supportive environment. - What to ask a group leader before signing up so you can feel confident it will be the right match for your child. If you've been curious whether group therapy might help your child feel supported, connected, and more capable in whatever challenges they are facing, this episode will give you a clear picture of what group work really looks like and how to decide if it could be a good fit for your kid. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🔗 Want to learn more about group therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode determine the fine line between supporting your child versus feeding their anxiety 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the different forms of therapy with Dr. Katie C. Lewis 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why parenting 6-12 year olds is more important now than ever with Dr. Sheryl Ziegler 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the difference between executive function coaching and tutoring WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Dec 11, 202521 min

Ep 366Breath-holding spells in children: What's normal, what's not, and how to stay calm with pediatrician Dr. Caity Gilman

Pediatrician Dr. Caity Gilman joins me this week to unpack breath-holding spells, those frightening moments when a child turns blue or pale, goes limp, or briefly loses consciousness during intense emotion or dysregulation or pain. Together we explore: - The two types of breath-holding spells and what triggers each of them. - Are certain children more prone to these episodes based on genetics, temperament, or other factors? - What should parents do in the moment to keep their child safe, and how to know when it's time to call their pediatrician. - What parents can do after a spell to comfort their child. - Do these spells cause any long-term harm, or are they truly benign? - How to support your child's emotion regulation and frustration tolerance between episodes. If you're currently navigating breath-holding spells, or you simply want to feel more prepared for the unexpected moments that come with raising little ones, this episode offers clarity, reassurance, and practical guidance from both a pediatrician and a fellow parent who has lived this experience firsthand. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Dr. Caity Gilman 🎧 Listen to Caity's first episode about vaccine safety LEARN MORE ABOUT ME: 🔗 drsarahbren.com 📱 @drsarahbren CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do if your child is afraid of going to the doctor 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about temperament, personality, and parenting with Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner

Dec 9, 202531 min

Ep 365Q&A: How do I start making meaningful holiday traditions with my kids when all they want is presents?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - How to start holiday traditions when you have a toddler and a new baby (without adding more pressure and stress to your plate!) - Setting realistic expectations so you don't feel disappointed if the picture in your head and the reality with your kids look very different. - How to stay flexible as your kids grow, their interests change, and your family evolves. - Why kids often latch onto those unexpected and unplanned moments of joy and togetherness - and how realizing this can help take some of the pressure off parents. - Simple ways to create meaningful holiday rituals, avoid overwhelm, and set a tone of joy, connection, and calm for your family this season. Whether you're navigating multiple holidays, trying to balance gifts with meaning, or simply hoping to make this season feel special (without losing your mind), this episode will help you build traditions that truly fit your family and remind you that the magic often comes from doing less, not more. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to keep your child from becoming spoiled 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether elf on the shelf is unaligned (or not!) with positive parenting 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how kids can get dysregulated from excitement too 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what you can do to if your child gets pressured to perform for other adults WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Dec 4, 202529 min

Ep 364The psychology of autonomy and growth: Building stress tolerance, confidence, and motivation with Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson

Joining me this week are Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson, co-authors of the bestselling book The Self-Driven Child and leading experts on the neuroscience of stress, motivation, and autonomy. Together we explore: - Why a child's sense of control is one of the strongest predictors of resilience, mental health, and stress tolerance. - How play, rest, and unstructured time uniquely support healthy brain development. - The hidden ways over-scheduling, overstimulation, and constant "fixing" can unintentionally increase anxiety. - What it really means to be a "non-anxious presence" — and how your calm helps regulate your child's nervous system. - How to give kids space to struggle, experiment, and try hard things without overwhelming them or abandoning them. - Practical, research-backed strategies for helping kids feel both safe and capable in a world that often feels anything but. Whether you're raising a toddler or a teen, this conversation offers a grounded, science-backed reframe for understanding stress, resilience, and autonomy — and meaningful tools you can start using today to strengthen connection and help your child thrive. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUESTS: 🔗 https://theselfdrivenchild.com/ 🎧 The Self-Driven Child Podcast 📚 The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives 📚 The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook 📚 What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home 🎧 The neuroscience of control: Helping kids cope with stress and become self-driven with Dr. William Stixrud FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@selfdrivenchild 📱@drbillstixrud 📱@theothernedjohnson 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Learned Helplessness at Fifty: Insights from Neuroscience 🔗 Rest Is Not Idleness: Implications of the Brain's Default Mode for Human Development and Education 🔗 A Social-Cognitive Approach to Motivation and Personality 🔗 Effects of the COVID-19 Pandemic on Mental Health and Brain Maturation in Adolescents: Implications for Analyzing Longitudinal Data 📚 The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about treating childhood anxiety through SPACE with the creator of this modality Dr. Eli Lebowitz 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the right (and wrong!) way to foster your child's independent play 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of an achievement centric approach with Jennifer Breheny Wallace 🎧 Listen to my podcast about how RIE can evolve into lifelong respectful parenting with Janet Lansbury

Dec 2, 202558 min

Ep 363Q&A: Is it normal for my toddler to constantly say they're sorry for everything?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... - If it's normal for a toddlers to say "I'm sorry" constantly, even when they haven't done anything wrong. - Breaking down child development: How repetition and "theory of mind" shape early empathy and build social awareness. - How to know when frequent apologizing is just a normal developmental phase (and when it might signal something more). - The subtle ways parents can unintentionally reinforce this habit (and some phrases and actions to try instead.) - How to respond to your child in the moment to build confidence, connection, and emotional understanding. If your little one apologizes for every stubbed toe, sibling squabble, or frustrated sigh, this episode will help you understand what's really going on and how to gently guide them toward more accurate empathy, without worry or overcorrection. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 📚 Want practical tools to help your child learn to manage big feelings? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to download my free guide, Strengthen Your Child's Emotion Regulation Skills Through Play. It's a resource packed with simple, fun games you can play with your child to strengthen their ability to recognize, express, and regulate their emotions. CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about understanding toddlerhood with Devon Kuntzman 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about supporting your toddler's sleep with Eileen Henry 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about how not to raise a people pleaser WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Nov 27, 202514 min

Ep 362A simple parenting strategy with a big impact on kids' self-regulation, attention, and creativity, with somatic therapist Alé Duarte

Alé Duarte, somatic therapist and creator of KidSoma joins me this week to explore how tuning into your child's natural rhythms can completely transform the way you understand their emotions and reactions. Together we unpack: - Why play isn't a break from learning, it is the learning. - What it means to help your child "complete a cycle" so their nervous system can settle and grow. - How "unfinished cycles" can leave kids dysregulated, impulsive, or anxious—and what parents can do to help their child complete these cycles in daily life. - Realistic ways to implement these strategies even when you're juggling busy schedules, time pressures, and the realities of everyday parenting. - Why slowing down and following your child's lead can actually make mornings smoother, transitions easier, and connection deeper. If you've ever wished you could understand what's happening underneath your child's big emotions and find a calmer rhythm for your entire family system, this conversation will change the way you see play, presence, and parenting. LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Alè Duarte 🔗 Kid Soma 🎧 Regulation, reward systems, and rest: Rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱IG: @aleduarte_international YouTube: @aleduartetube 📱@drsarahbren ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 What is Somatic Experiencing? 👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages! CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about choosing between play therapy for kids and parenting support 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the benefits of mindfulness 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using play to strengthen your child's secure attachment bond with Vered Benhorin

Nov 25, 20251h 4m

Ep 361Q&A: What can I do if my child is reading below grade level, but is resistant to tutoring?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - Why kids often say "this is boring" when something actually feels too hard or frustrating. - How to tell whether your child's struggle with schoolwork might be about motivation, confidence, or a deeper learning challenge. - What to do when tutoring or extra practice starts leading to power struggles or resistance. - The pros and cons of reward systems, and how to use incentives in a way that truly motivates your child (without creating more stress). - When to consider a school-based or private evaluation—and how to know which supports will make the biggest difference for your child's unique struggles. If your child has started saying they "hate school" or "reading is boring" this episode will help you understand what's really driving that resistance and give you practical, compassionate ways to make learning feel lighter, more motivating, and even fun again. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🔗 Learn about the Orton-Gillingham approach to reading for those with dyslexia 👉 If you're starting to wonder whether your child's challenges with learning might be more than a motivation issue, our Neuropsychological Testing services can help. Visit https://upshurbren.com/neuropsychological-testing to learn how we assess and support children with learning differences, or schedule a free call to talk through what resources might be right for your child. ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about the difference between tutoring and executive functioning skills 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about the neuroscience of raising emotionally resilient kids with Dr. Kristen Lindquist 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about the best response for when your child says "I'm bored" 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about using creativity to support mental health and resilience Sharon Itkoff Nacache WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Nov 20, 202521 min