Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

A parent writes that her 3-year-old has developed a phobic response to bugs and is withdrawing from activities she’s always loved because of the fear. This mom and her husband have tried several strategies to help their daughter including acknowledging her fear, but to no avail. They’re out of ideas and assume they’re doing something wrong. “I want to show her we love and respect her emotions but also help her work through it.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mom realizes that she and her husband have been helping their 3-year-old to get dressed by actually doing it for him. Recently they’ve taken a step back to allow “ample time for him to do what he can independently,” but he either gives up quickly and demands help, or if they’re patient, he might take an hour to put on his pants. This mom feels they might be missing something that would encourage him to develop these skills. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to the parent of two kids who overheard her 4.5 year old taunting another child in the park and wasn’t sure how to react to that sort of unkind behavior. On the one hand, she didn’t want to impose judgement on her daughter by scolding and lecturing. On the other, “I want to help coach her on being kind and a good human being." She's unsure of what to do to help foster these traits and is asking Janet for clarification. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a parent who says her kids scream at her, shout orders, complain about their lives, and call her a “rubbish mum.” While she acknowledges her former partner’s emotionally abusive behavior is probably a factor in their behavior, and she believes her kids should express their emotions fully, she’s fed up. “How much abuse and screaming am I supposed to put up with before I stop acknowledging, stop empathizing, and say enough is enough?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a pregnant mom in her first trimester trying to parent her active young son while suffering from nausea, headaches, and exhaustion. She writes that she often feels unmercifully tired, and she struggles “to offer the calm, respectful care I ought to provide.” She’s hoping Janet has suggestions how to parent with patience and respect even when she’s feeling exhausted. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a mom who says her 2-year-old has an extreme case of “parental favoritism.” When she’s not home, father and daughter enjoy a wonderful relationship. But if she’s nearby, her daughter “refuses to allow my husband to help, comfort, even exist.” She writes: “We are completely befuddled, and as you can imagine, my husband is just crushed.” They’re both wondering why their daughter behaves this way and how they might address it. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to the parent of a toddler who says her son “cries, whines, and screams for everything he wants or needs.” She’s not sure how to respond. Sometimes she tries to calm him down, which tends to makes things worse, and sometimes she just gives in. She wants to set boundaries but doesn’t know how to do it in a way that he will understand without setting off a tantrum. This mom feels she’s in a no-win situation and would like Janet's advice about how she should react to his loud, emphatic requests. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio. Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet offers solutions for handling the disconnect parents sometimes feel with friends, relatives or caregivers who aren’t familiar with their respectful parenting philosophy. How can we communicate our respectful care practices and advocate for our children while avoiding awkward social exchanges, misunderstandings or hurt feelings? For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a parent who feels her son is constantly competing to be “first, better, stronger.” She suspects that sometimes his hyper-competitiveness may hurt his friends’ feelings, and it makes her uncomfortable when she notices the reactions of parents and other kids. “I’m really struggling with how to respond to these situations,” she says. “I don’t want my child making others feel crappy about themselves.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a parent who says she tries to create safe spaces for her 7-month-old to explore, but she spends a lot of time at her parents’ house and feels they’re always on edge, telling her daughter “no.” This mom wants to avoid “creating issues or desensitizing her to the word” and is hoping Janet has suggestions how to encourage her daughter’s curiosity while keeping her safe. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an e-mail from a parent who says her 4-year-old has lately become very demanding for attention. “She won’t let us talk with friends, family, or over the phone. It has to be about her all the time.” She is also being defiant, especially in public, and ends up crying when she doesn’t get her way. This mom feels her friends and family have cast her as a ‘bad mom’ and wants Janet’s advice about “how to stop this excessive attention seeking, defiant behavior.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mom writes that her toddler weaned at 3 years old, but six months later he remains “obsessed with my breasts.” He pokes and squeezes and smushes his face into them. She has tried to give him the message that this is not okay while also trying to be understanding, but he’s getting rougher, and she’s had enough. “This is not fun.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet offers feedback to a parent who’s having a disagreement with his spouse about how to respond to their 5-month-old's babbling, which includes "high-pitched coos and zerberts and yelps.” Both parents want to encourage their daughter's communication, and this dad exclaims, "We need a decider!" For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a parent who writes that her 3-year-old son has very strong opinions about her appearance, especially hair and clothing choices. He gets furious when she puts her hair up in a ponytail or bun, and if she defies him, it leads to “epic tantrums and standoffs.” This mom realizes her son’s controlling attitude is probably part of a larger issue and points out, “He has zero opinions about what his dad wears.” She’s hoping Janet has some insight into this frustrating dynamic with her son. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from the parent of three kids (12, 9 and 3) who has just recently found "Unruffled". She writes: “Your methods and insights have been truly freeing and a paradigm shift in experience for me.” She realizes now that her parenting style has included shaming, inconsistencies, and a negative reaction to her kids’ emotions, and her middle child especially is struggling as a result. She feels guilty and is wondering how to make things right. “How can I help them after all the damage I have done?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble, and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that she and her 2-year-old son recently moved in with relatives to escape domestic violence. She describes her son as “a very sweet, empathetic boy,” and says that he has formed good relationships with his relatives. Lately, however, his behavior towards them has changed. “He will punch, hit, and bite” without warning and tells his mother that “he wants to make them sad.” She has tried to explain that this behavior isn't okay, and he agrees, but it inevitably happens again. She doesn’t know what to do and is looking to Janet for some advice. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a parent who’s struggling with how to start setting limits with her 15-month-old. She says she wants to “parent with respect, with a gentle approach and natural consequences,” but her daughter’s constant testing has her feeling exhausted. “And I know the hard stuff is only beginning!” This mom suspects she should have started establishing limits when her daughter was younger, but she’s hoping Janet has some strategies and advice on how to proceed now. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mother of two (3 and 5 years old) writes that she became a parent “with every intention of validating my children’s emotions and teaching them emotional expression.” Now she feels that perhaps her good intentions have backfired, and that her children’s whining and crying aren’t always genuine but may instead be an act. She says, “It’s as if they play the dramatic role for me, but they can just as quickly shift out of it.” She’s wondering if Janet has any insight into this dynamic, and especially how she can improve it. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a question from a parent who’s saddened that her 4-year-old is showing signs of general anxiety. “I’m seeing a pattern of scouting for danger instead of just letting loose and having fun,” she says. She also recognizes this tendency in herself. This mom is wondering if her daughter’s disposition is inherited or learned by modeling, and if there’s anything she could be doing differently. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet speaks with author Maggie Dent about her newest book “Mothering Our Boys” in which she focuses on the common misconceptions we hold about boys and how these perceptions can negatively inform our attitudes and expectations. Maggie is a prolific parenting author and educator who advocates for a healthy, common sense approach to parenting. She is a passionate, positive voice for children of all ages, and her wisdom is an invaluable resource for parents, teachers, early educators and anyone seeking to improve their lives and relationships. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a parent asking how to prepare her 3-year-old for an enormous transition, in this case the arrival of a new sibling. Since her daughter brushes off direct questions about her feelings, this mom has decided she can’t really grasp it yet, but she’s anticipating limits and patience testing. She wants to know: “Is there any way I can help her prepare and make this transition less drastic?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a parent who says she feels like a failure when dealing with her two-year-old’s tantrums. She writes: “We’ve been great at heading them off before they begin and recognizing why they’re happening, but we are completely at a loss what to do once we’re stuck with one.” She’s tried several different strategies without success. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a parent whose daughter decided at 4 years old that she didn’t like herself, chopped her hair short and switched out her wardrobe for boys’ clothes. While this mom has tried not to make a big issue of her daughter’s choices, now that she’s 6 years old she admits, “Deep down it bothers me that she seems to want to look like a boy.” She says she loves her daughter dearly and wants a great relationship with her. “How do I go about accepting who my daughter wants to be?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from the exasperated mother of two boys who asks: “What do I do when I find my adorable children genuinely annoying?” She remembers a time when she was happy with them and enjoyed what felt like precious moments, but lately there’s been very little joy in her parenting experience, and she feels that their behavior is exacerbated by her attitude. “It breaks my heart,” she writes. She’s looking for tools to change her perspective. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a dad who’s feeling guilty for restraining his 3-year old daughter and forcibly brushing her teeth when she refused to do so herself. “I didn’t use hurtful force,” he writes, “but her protestations were so strong that I felt as if I was crossing a boundary.” This dad is wondering if there was another way he might have handled the situation. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a Facebook message from a parent who describes her 6-year-old as argumentative and resistant, and she’s running out of patience. She says, “ I recognize that he is testing limits and trying to establish his voice and independence in the world,” but she has other kids and feels her son’s questioning takes up too much of her time. She wonders if she should be flexible with him, or if that approach will just intensify his relentless push-back. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to the parent of 8-month-old twins who says they are both very dependent on her, and she gets overwhelmed by her babies “complaining and crying at the same time.” Though she tries to respectfully acknowledge each twin, she worries that she isn’t being successful. The insight and advice Janet offers apply to all family situations, no matter how many children a parent is caring for. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 3-year-old seems to intentionally ignore her when she asks him a question and she has to repeat herself several times. She doesn’t know if he’s misbehaving or if this is a result of his “hyper-focused personality,” and she says she sometimes loses her patience and shouts. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio, FREE with a 30-day trial membership at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 5-year-old scratched up her husband’s car with a rock, and the damage will cost thousands of dollars to repair. She and her husband are furious, of course, but they haven’t spoken to their son about the incident yet, and she’s wondering the best way to approach it. “We are both so mad,” she writes, “we don’t know what to do.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 5-year-old is constantly asking, “Did I do a good job?” and seeking her parents’ validation. This mom acknowledges that her daughter’s world was rocked when her sister was born almost two years ago, and they’ve been working at supporting her to process her feelings in that regard. Now, she says, although her daughter has “let go a lot of her anger... I can’t help but wonder if it’s the result of being insecure in her relationship with us after her sister was born." For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The parent of a 5-year-old girl and 2.5-year-old boy describes their play as generally creative and happy, but she sometimes observes what she believes is “manipulative behavior and unkind talk during disagreements.” This mother is wondering if it’s appropriate to intervene and correct what she perceives as unhealthy behavior, or whether it’s just part of their personal and social development. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a parent whose 6-year-old boy has been hitting and pinching his younger sister and others, and she’s alarmed because he shows no remorse for his behavior. She says that she has tried to get her boy to talk about his feelings, but “he just shuts down and won’t talk to me.” She’s wondering how she might foster empathy in her son as well as encourage him to share his feelings. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a question from a parent on her Facebook page whose 3-year-old is exhibiting what she describes as excessive emotional outbursts. “I’m trying to reassure myself that this is normal,” she writes. “It’s like we have to constantly walk on eggshells… I’d love some reassurance and guidance.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a mom whose 3-year-old has a physical disorder. “Among other issues, he is very clumsy and often stumbles, trips, and falls.” Since this is going to be an ongoing issue for her son, and he’s just becoming aware of it, this mom is looking for ways to be supportive now and in the future. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to an email from a stay-at-home parent who feels his efforts to establish and maintain boundaries during the day are undercut when his spouse returns home from work. He believes the daily struggles he has with their daughter “are partly or greatly exacerbated by my wife’s interactions with her…. I’m drained as a parent and feeling resentful towards my spouse for letting a stubborn 3.5-year-old have her way.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that she’s struggling with her 5-year-old’s demands to play with her. This mom says that although she understands the theory of Janet’s parenting approach, she has difficulty putting it into practice in the moment, and she finds herself getting frustrated and being unkind. “She irritates me, and I feel absolutely terrible for admitting that!” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 18-month-old “has been testing the limits with tantrums.” At home, this mom and her husband try to ignore the behavior or redirect. In public, however, they tend to give in to their daughter’s demands. She writes, “I’d hate for her to learn she gets her way by throwing fits.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent describes her 6-year-old daughter as a perfectionist with no patience and a serious discomfort with feelings of failure. She says that all her well-intentioned efforts to calm, comfort, and coach only make things worse, so she wonders if Janet knows how she might help her daughter “face problems confidently on her own and foster a love of process.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on audio at Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is also available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 2-year-old is deep in a "want to do it myself" phase. While she recognizes her son’s need for autonomy and self-sufficiency, she admits that she often runs out of patience, which results in him having a full-blown meltdown or tantrum. She’s wondering how she might “set limits so it doesn’t take forever to do things but also respect his need for independence.” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet continues her conversation with Laura Grace Weldon, author of “Free Range Learning,” about how parents can facilitate their children’s natural instincts to discover and learn in a conventional school system. Laura and Janet share their personal experiences as parents and discuss what they’ve learned while parenting their own children through a variety of school choices. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 3-year old has been having difficulties in play school -- hitting other kids, screaming, and not listening to the teacher. The behavior sometimes continues at home, and this mom admits she “can’t manage to stay calm every time, so sometimes I yell too.” Her primary concern is that her boy won’t be accepted in playschool, and she’s looking for some advice how to address his behavior. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet is joined by Susan Stiffelman in a lively conversation about setting limits, tantrums, what your children want versus what they need, emotional resilience, having compassion for yourself, and the positive effects your confident leadership has on children as they become teens and young adults. Susan is a best-selling parenting author (“Parenting with Presence,” “Parenting without Power Struggles”), a marriage, family, and child counselor, educational therapist, parent educator, and professional speaker. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet speaks with pioneering homeschool practitioner and advocate Laura Grace Weldon, author of the best-selling book Free Range Learning – How Homeschooling Changes Everything. Laura’s experiences capture the essence of how children learn best and gain competence, self-confidence, maturity, and wisdom. She and Janet find common ground in their respect for the natural learning process of every child. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible. Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet answers an email from a parent whose 3-year-old is having difficulty with transitions, especially getting dressed in the morning for pre-school. She’s tried several different approaches, but without success, and every morning ends in a struggle. She writes: “I feel like we are stuck in this weekday morning drama and don’t know what to do differently. Please help!” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (https://adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent who describes her 3-year-old as “bright and spirited… a sweet girl” has noticed lately in certain social situations that her daughter will flatly reject friendly overtures from peers. This makes the parent very uncomfortable, but she isn’t sure how or if to intervene. She writes, “I am so torn between accepting and trusting her and wanting to teach her to be nice to others.” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible. Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent has noticed positive results from limiting her daughter’s TV time, and now she wants to remove all screens from her daily routine. “I’d really love some advice on how to go about this,” she writes, “and what to say when explaining why this change is happening.” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible. Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet answers a question from a parent whose toddler resorts to hurting himself when he’s angry or frustrated, and she’s wondering if there are some “better options” to teach him when he’s expressing his emotions. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible. Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet answers an email from a parent who feels her 16-month-old is more emotional and defiant with her than other caregivers. She cites diaper changes as a particularly stressful example of his acting out and wonders, “Is this a sign that I am doing something wrong, or that I am a safe person to share emotions with?” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mother wonders when and how to react to her baby’s sounds of frustration, whether she should intervene in her child’s self-directed play sessions or observe from a distance. “I don’t want to be her savior,” she writes, “but I don’t want her to feel unsupported either.” For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mother writes that her child has started saying, “You’re not the boss of me!” when asked to help around the house. While both parents want their kids to feel that they are their own people, “at the end of the day, we do say what goes.” This mom is wondering how she can best respond. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices