Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

Pediatric psychologist Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart joins Janet to discuss the common concerns parents have about anxiety in children. Dr. Lockhart explains how we can distinguish anxiety from normal childhood feelings of fear and worry. She also shares steps parents can take to alleviate anxiety and prevent it from becoming an issue. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent is concerned that her 2.5-year-old won’t say hello or goodbye to adults, including people he’s familiar with like neighbors and teachers. This mom says that she's tried to encourage her son's manners through modeling. She also once coaxed him to say goodbye to his teacher, but he refused. Since that time, he's become even more resistant and sometimes yells at people not to talk to him. At this point, she says, “It would even be fine if he ignored people" rather than yelling. She’s hoping Janet has some insight into what’s going on with her son and how she can help him get in the habit of politely greeting adults. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Early childhood education specialist Mr. Chazz joins Janet to discuss the common challenges children face in preschool. Chazz is the current Educational Supervisor of 9 preschools, a passionate teacher who has interacted with thousands of children, and an inspiring coach for both parents and teachers. He shares strategies for effectively addressing behavior issues and offer insights for parents and teachers to create nurturing learning environments that will set our kids up for success. Mr. Chazz is available for parent coaching and can be found at: http://www.Patreon.com/MrChazz. His podcast is "Mr. Chazz’s Leadership, Parenting and Teaching Podcast." He's also on: Instagram - Mrchazz Tiktok - Mrchazzmrchazz Facebook - MrChazz MrChazz For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Confused and dismayed, a parent asks Janet for help with a bedtime pattern that has developed with her 3-year-old. Her daughter keeps changing her mind about being tucked in. Unable to please her child either way, this mom leaves the room, which causes her daughter to explode. Upset by the outburst of emotion, she soon returns. “As soon as I go back she calms down, gets in bed, and lets me tuck her in and leave the room without a fuss.” This mom is worried that she is encouraging her daughter to use a tantrum to prolong bedtime and wonders if Janet has suggestions for shifting this pattern into a happier bedtime routine. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent wants to get out of a cycle of bribing her 3.5-year old and writes to Janet for help. “It seems that in order to get him to do anything, I have to offer a reward, treat, or special outing.” If these strategies don’t work, she says, she will threaten to take something away. This mom admits that she is a people pleaser, so when she does set a boundary, she feels guilty about it. She worries that she’s teaching this to her son. “I don’t want him to feel guilty about his feelings or his boundaries.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In response to a parent's question about her toddler's aggressive impulses toward her newborn sister, Janet suggests strategies for encouraging our children -- beginning in infancy-- to communicate their innermost thoughts, feelings and needs. This parent and her husband have followed Janet’s advice on siblings and believe they are “doing a decent job supporting them both – keeping our baby safe while acknowledging our toddler’s feelings.” And when their toddler acts aggressively, both parents are diligent about being present, calm, and physically intervening “without judgment or fanfare.” A few times a week, however, when the toddler is alone with her mom, she will calmly say things like, “When H gets bigger, I’m going to knock her down,” or other imagined acts of aggression. This mom wonders why her daughter is telling these stories – whether she’s asking for help, or if it’s something else. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent is distressed that his son says he doesn’t like, or is afraid of Black people, a sentiment that is abhorrent to him. "Worst of all," the dad writes, "he will say this when he sees Black neighbors." The dad realizes that his strong reactions may be making matters worse, but his son's statements are striking a particularly sensitive nerve. "If this were literally anything else I would just minimize my responses to it and acknowledge the feeling.” This parent feels at a loss and is hoping Janet has a solution. "This is absolutely the biggest parenting challenge I have faced." For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her 5-year-old has never recovered from the arrival of her younger brother (now 3.5 yrs). “Since he was born, she has subjected him to physical violence and verbal taunting.” She describes her daughter as bright and strong-willed, and her son as gentle, loving and forgiving. She says she has tried everything to help her daughter manage her emotions more appropriately, including psychologists, but the behavior persists no matter what she says or does. “It breaks my heart.” She believes both her children are in pain and she’s looking to Janet for advice and perhaps some strategies she hasn’t tried. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that she’s overwhelmed by her two girls constantly demanding her attention, following her around their home and calling “Mommy! Mommy!” even if they are in the same room. “It’s driving me mad,” she writes. “It’s like a dripping tap. It is getting to the point where I just want to scream.” This mom notices that the girls don’t have this dynamic with their father. In fact, even if he is sitting beside them and she is in another room, they still call to her. Understandably, she feels drained and wonders if Janet can tell her what she’s doing wrong. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Rosalia Rivera, an abuse prevention specialist and consent educator, joins Janet to outline how parents and caregivers can help prevent sexual abuse by educating the children in their lives about body safety, boundaries and consent. Rosalia is the mother of three young children and is herself a child sexual abuse survivor. She hosts the podcast “AboutConsent” and is the founder of Consent Parenting, an online platform that offers courses, workshops, a support group, and a plan of action for parents to protect their children. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Two families reach out to Janet for help because they are struggling to get work done at home. Separating from their young children causes whining, crying and tantrums, which in turn interrupts and frustrates the parents. One parent writes: ”My son has significant tantrums about why daddy has to work… I really can’t take the tantrums anymore every time he sees or hears him.” With so many parents at home these days trying to navigate this dynamic, Janet offers 3 suggestions for how they can communicate respectfully with their children and help to establish boundaries. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent hopes to encourage her 21-month old’s self-directed play by sitting with her in her play area observing, “ready to respond if she engages with me.” Lately, she says, her daughter has been asking for help with tasks she can do by herself, and also actively directing both she and her husband to perform various roles. “She wants us to play, and she will watch.” This mom feels this dynamic may be stifling self-direction, so she’s wondering if Janet has any suggestions how she can encourage her daughter’s play without participating. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Jennifer Eberhart, author of the best-selling book “Biased: Uncovering the Hidden Prejudice That Shapes What We See, Think, and Do,” joins Janet to discuss how racial bias develops in the brain and creates disparities in our neighborhoods, schools, workplaces, and the criminal justice system. As the mother of three sons, Jennifer has also witnessed the effects of bias in real time. She and Janet explore some of the steps parents can take to combat the development of bias in their children. "Preschoolers are picking this up and determining who's a good person, who's a bad person… They need our help in comprehending what's going on around them and helping them to make sense of it." Jennifer is a Stanford University professor and a faculty director of SPARQ , a university initiative to use social psychological research to address pressing social problems. She has been named a MacArthur Fellow, one of “Foreign Policy”’s 100 Leading Global Thinkers, and elected to both the American Academy of Arts and Sciences and the National Academy of Sciences. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A frustrated parent writes that her almost 7-year-old will not accept no for an answer. When she wants something, she will whine and ask repeatedly to get her way. Her daughter is so relentless that this mom eventually loses her patience. She ends up screaming, and her daughter ends up crying. “I must be addressing the situation wrong at the first ask,” she admits. “I just don’t understand how she doesn’t get no means no.” This mom is hoping Janet can help her end this constant battle with her daughter. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent describes the stress her family has been experiencing over the past several months and believes her 4.5 year old son has been particularly affected. “He was in Montessori and becoming very independent. Little by little, we’ve seen a huge regression in his behavior.” She describes a number of issues where she sees her son regressing, including hitting, kicking and throwing things; disrespecting her body with unwanted touching; and an unwillingness to wipe himself after using the toilet. This last issue recently caused a physical altercation which this mom truly regrets. She wants to know how to encourage her son’s developing independence “without resorting to negative and hurtful parenting tactics.” Janet offers her advice. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Kristen Coggins is a respiratory therapist, a positive discipline educator, a mom, and a Black woman, so she is very much in the eye of the current storm with a first-person perspective of the history unfolding around us. Krissy and Janet discuss the positive steps parents can take right now toward raising empathetic, anti-racist children, starting with the hard work of self-reflection with compassion. As Krissy writes: “Being able to appreciate the full humanity of another person is fostered in how well you see yourself and how well you see your children. Do you treat them like whole people with their own thoughts, feelings and desires? Everything is cyclical.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A stressed parent’s email prompted Janet to offer a phone consultation to address some of the common issues facing many parents who are now working at home. This mom says in her email that she has tried (and failed) to provide structure to the day to include uninterrupted one-on-one time with each child, periods where both she and her husband can concentrate on their work, and attempts at self-care. But it hasn’t worked. She also feels envious of parents who say that they are enjoying or even savoring this time at home with their kids, because “between working, caring for the kids, feeding my family, keeping the house, and managing our anxiety… my husband and I have never felt busier.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The parent of a 4-year-old who describes her child as strong-willed and social is concerned that she and her husband did not set boundaries early enough, and they are now paying for it. She admits that for most of her boy's young life she was reluctant to enforce boundaries so as not to upset him. Now when she tries to do so, his reaction is explosive. She asks how they can communicate with their son “without the hitting and kicking… Is it hopeless? Is it too late for him? Is it too late for us?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet welcomes early childhood educator Tom (“Teacher Tom”) Hobson who shares his optimism and insights about our children’s abilities to learn, grow and flourish outside of a classroom setting. Both Tom and Janet have always asserted that the most valuable education a preschooler receives is organic and self-motivated. They believe that time spent interacting authentically with parents is always precious and can become the most memorable and positive experiences in our young children’s lives. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Psychologist, author and TED Talk superstar Susan David joins Janet to discuss how parents can nurture their children’s capacity to process difficult emotions, thoughts, and experiences. “Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life,” she says, but we can help our children develop resilience and a capability to navigate uncomfortable emotions so they're no longer scary. Susan offers advice how parents can instill confidence and a sense of well-being. The process begins with awareness, acceptance, and compassion for ourselves. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Even in the best of times, caring for children is a balancing act that is never mastered. The ground shifts constantly, and we adapt accordingly, doing our very best to provide care, love, support and encouragement within the daily rhythms of our lives. Our children are acutely aware of change or disruption, and they look to us for stability and leadership. In fact, they insist upon it. If we falter, they’ll reflect it in their behaviors. That’s a lot of pressure! In this episode, Janet offers five suggestions parents can use to help maintain their balance with confidence and grace. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“Life in lockdown” is heightening a parent's struggles with her 3-year-old's uncooperative, defiant behavior, and this mom's patience is wearing thin. When she tries to correct her daughter’s behavior, or if she asks for her cooperation with calm and reason, she ends up repeating herself again and again and raising her voice. This escalation makes her feel exhausted, guilty and like a failure. She writes: “I lost my confidence as a parent somewhere, and I need to get it together, but I don’t know where to begin.” She wonders if Janet can suggest any changes in her parenting approach. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet consults with a military mom of a 3-year old daughter who is trying to decide whether to accept a lengthy deployment. She wants to understand the effects it may have on her daughter and steps she can take to maintain their strong relationship. Her husband is also active-duty and travels regularly, but he is about to be deployed for several months, so she’s hoping Janet has some suggestions how to manage this extended separation as well as the transition when he comes back into their daughter’s life. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Acclaimed early childhood educator and play-master Lisa Griffen-Murphy joins Janet to encourage parents to release themselves from the pressure of making play and learning happen for their kids. Lisa shares from her vast experience facilitating children's play in every environment imaginable. She offers specific, open-ended ideas for inspiring learning through play and assures parents that their kids know instinctively what they’re doing. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In these rapidly changing, unsettling times, as families are hunkering down and lives are put on hold, Janet is joined by author and therapist Susan Stiffelman to answer a parent’s concerns about discussing current events with her 4-year old. She describes her daughter as inquisitive, sensitive, and a child who tends to ask a lot of questions, and she wants to be as honest as possible without alarming her. “I want to use language that is appropriate and that she can understand, but also have it in the back of my mind she tends to be anxious and worry about things.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent describes her 4-year-old son as energetic, independent and strong-willed. While she appreciates her son’s enthusiasm, she struggles to reign him in and finds herself yelling, "You're not listening!" She says they often take nature walks with friends and he inevitably runs ahead at an unsafe distance. She feels overwhelmed, especially when they are out with other parents “that have high expectations for behavior." She hopes Janet can offer a way to help her son listen, but “without killing his free spirit.” Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is it okay to show emotion to our kids? Is it helpful? Too unsettling? A parent has questions for Janet about modeling self-regulation and healthy emotional expression to children. She writes: “These feel like life skills that are harder to explain to your child but can be shown in practice.” So, this mom wants to be authentic, but she also wonders if exposing her own human vulnerabilities through crying or anger would be too disturbing. "I would really value your thoughts to help unravel this contradiction in my mind." For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nationally recognized educator and author Rick Ackerly joins Janet to discuss how parents can foster an environment that helps children thrive in school and in life. Like Janet, Rick’s own experience and interactions with thousands of kids have proven to him that children learn best in their own time, and in their own surprising ways. Rick and Janet discuss how parents can reduce their own anxieties about what and how quickly their children are learning and ultimately enjoy and appreciate them more. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent shares that she is frustrated and exhausted by her son’s clingy behavior. She describes a typical evening arriving home from work to find her boy waiting by the door, insisting she drop everything to sit down and play with him. If she tries to use the restroom, put some things away or eat dinner, this often causes a tantrum with her son pulling at her hands or clothing to go back and play. This parent says both she and her partner work full time and wonders if that may be causing the severe clinginess. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet offers basic guidelines for responding mindfully when children get hurt, whether by accident or as the result of another child's behavior. She also addresses the specifics in a parent's note about her son's emotional responses to getting pushed or hit when she isn't close enough to prevent it. She says he seems "shocked" but fine, but he falls apart when adults surround him and express their urgent concern. “I can tell that it’s the reactions from the adults that has really upset and scared him.” While she hopes to prevent future events like this from happening in the first place, she knows that won’t always be possible, and she wonders how Janet would advise calming her son in the aftermath. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a Facebook post from a parent who shares her personal dismay “at what children across the globe suffer and what they go without,” and she is distraught by her own children's apparent lack of gratitude and humility. While this mom admits her current mood may be the result of “post-Christmas blues,” she wants to instill these positive, empathetic traits in her own children. “How do you model this?” she asks. “I want to do better.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

After reading Janet’s book “No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame,” a parent has some practical follow-up questions about his daughter’s behaviors; specifically in regard to tantrums, mealtime boundaries, and cooperation in cleaning up her messes. This dad says there are certain “values/etiquette” he would like his daughter to learn, but he realizes these qualities must evolve organically and can’t be coerced. He describes his own upbringing as disciplinarian, and he doesn’t want to expose his kids “to the same feelings of shame and mistrust.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Tina Payne Bryson joins Janet to discuss what children need most from the adults in their lives to feel securely attached, self-confident, and happy. Tina outlines the truths that scientific research and her own experience show, and then using the parenting tools she describes in her new book “The Power of Showing Up,” she and Janet address an email from a parent who’s concerned about her two-year-old daughter’s disrespectful tone of voice. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that her toddler is very aware of his emotions and even has several strategies to cope with the negative ones. One of these strategies is going to his room by himself. While this mom is “happy that he is aware of his emotions and (usually) redirects them before causing harm or throwing a full-blown tantrum,” she struggles with how long to let him isolate. She worries she may be encouraging him to mope or empowering his sour attitude. “I wonder if we should be more assertive in having him try alternative strategies.” Janet offers her perspective and advice. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble and Apple Books. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to the parent of a 2-year-old who for the past 3 months has been “going through a really bad stage of pulling hair.” This parent describes herself as a Montessori teacher with an intense passion for gentle, respectful parenting. She has tried several strategies to change her daughter’s behavior, but to no avail. “I’m exhausted and have become extremely depressed and isolated because of this. I feel parents are judging me and not wanting to spend time with us.” She’s hoping Janet can offer some guidance, hopefully a solution. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet shares ideas for traveling with small children that help us tune in to their perspectives, deepen our parent-child connection, and create a more joyful experience for all. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible -- FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks are also available at Amazon. E-Books are sold through Amazon, Apple Books, Google Play, and Barnes & Noble. Janet's audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet welcomes back best-selling author Maggie Dent to discuss some of the particular challenges parents face in their quest to raise emotionally healthy children. "We need to let our girls know they can be strong and feisty and it's okay, and we need to know that there are times when our boys need to be vulnerable and sad, and that also needs to be okay." As we navigate our children’s moods and behaviors, Maggie believes that messy, even chaotic moments are normal in learning the dance that is parenting, and it is in these difficult times that we all grow. “It was never a perfect art form,” she says. “You're not a bad parent or a lousy parent. This is what parenting is.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble. Janet's holiday recommendations for books and gifts for children are available on her website here: https://cutt.ly/ne907MI Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In response to a parent’s question about her 4-year-old’s habit of appropriating toys and clothing that don’t belong to her, Janet illuminates the underlying causes for some other troubling -- but common -- childhood behaviors. This mom writes that she has tried to explain to her daughter why the behavior is wrong and has been hoping that she will outgrow it, but it has only gotten worse. “I know it’s not about the things,” she writes. “She rarely cares about the thing once she’s brought it home.” This mom believes there must be underlying feelings motivating the behavior, but she doesn’t know what they are, so she’s hoping Janet can offer some insight. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent understands and supports Janet’s advice about accepting and holding space for her kids’ feelings, but she struggles to put it into practice. She describes herself as a highly verbal person and finds herself uncomfortable remaining silent in these moments. And often, when she does acknowledge her 5-year-old’s feelings, her child just gets more upset. This mom is seeking “some concrete examples of what acknowledging and allowing feelings actually looks like when my kids are expressing big feelings.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

3 experts – 1 microphone… Janet is joined in a lively discussion by family counselor Susan Stiffelman and best-selling parenting author Maggie Dent. Together they explore some of the common issues affecting our children’s behaviors and offer steps parents can take to understand and address them. How do we respond when our child’s behavior seems problematic? Is it a reflection on us? And how do we communicate with our child to untangle what’s really going on and address the root cause? For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent is perplexed that her 4-year-old continually engages her in made up stories where the protagonist is in physical danger, sick, “does a bad thing,” is mean, or had to call the police. While this mom believes her child's interests are generally innocent, they've continued relentlessly for 6 months and she's becoming exasperated. “Is this normal exploration?” she wonders. “How do we handle it?” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode: Janet welcomes Dr. Mona Delahooke, a pediatric psychologist who works with children and teens with behavioral challenges and developmental differences. Mona’s compassionate approach to therapy is based on brain science. She describes disruptive behaviors as “just the tip of the iceberg,” important signals a child may be sending that are symptoms of an underlying issue. This is common ground for Janet, as she has long held that many behaviors which parents deem negative are rarely motivated, intentional, or consciously anti-social. They are, in fact, reflections of a dysregulated emotional state which needs to be acknowledged. Mona’s new book is available on Amazon: “Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges.” For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to a question from a caregiver who says the family she works for is interested in teaching their son ABCs and other lessons. The child is sometimes disinterested and refuses to participate, and she wonders: “Is there a respectful approach to teaching children?” Janet responds with an alternative perspective on early childhood learning that focuses on providing the best foundation possible for children to develop their innate abilities and a lifelong love of learning. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet addresses two emails with the same theme. Both questions concern two-year-olds who exhibit challenging behaviors when their parents are physically unable to intervene. One mom writes about her son's toy throwing: “He sees that I’m nursing the baby, or that my hands are full with dinner, and he’s frustrated that he doesn’t have my attention.” The other mom says that she has physical challenges: “And of course my smart kid has figured out that it’s easy to lash out on days when I am physically unable to deal.” These moms are wondering what words to use and how to address behavior when they can't be as hands-on as they need to be. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent wonders if the praise her children are receiving is unproductive and could make them feel pressured to "meet the expectations of whatever a compliment implies.” While this mom acknowledges she’s dealing in subtleties, she’s wondering if Janet has any insights. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent describes her 3-year-old as a firecracker. “He is full of life and joy and attitude!” While she appreciates his energy, there are times when he gets too wound up and is no longer “in himself.” He often becomes overly physical with his 17-month-old brother and even hits adults. She says when he’s in this zone, words have no effect, and she feels the only way to deal with him by putting him in his room. This mum’s wondering if she’s doing the right thing or if Janet might have some other suggestions. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at JanetLansbury.com and NoBadKidsCourse.com. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent wants to give her toddler the freedom to work out struggles with other kids, but because of their busy urban environment, parent and child tend to be in close quarters. She says of her son and his playmates: “They look right at us expecting, needing, wanting our help.” To this mom, it seems the children believe their parents are “purposefully watching them struggle and kind of laughing at them by not helping.” She’s wondering how it’s possible to allow the struggle while still assuring her toddler that he’s being supported. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership if you use this link: adbl.co/2OBVztZ. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet is joined by trauma recovery expert Elisabeth Corey to answer a parent’s email about her struggles to become a respectful parent. This mom says certain behaviors of her 2.5-year old daughter set her off. “I don’t stay calm, focused, kind to my child.” And she believes her own upbringing (“in no way respectful”) is the root cause of her reactions. She is overwhelmed by the responsibility of raising her child and wants to know: “What can I do to help myself?” Janet and Elisabeth consider the common underlying issues of our own childhoods and how we can recognize and heal negative cycles to become better parents. Elisabeth's work and free resources for parents are available on her site at: www.BeatingTrauma.com For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes that she’s overwhelmed since the arrival of her third child. While she used to manage a reasonable schedule that allowed for chores, self-care, and one-on-one time with her kids, now the older ones whine and scream and demand her attention. Any semblance of order in her day “has completely gone out the window.” She says her household is in chaos, her kids are miserable, and that she’s simply burnt out. “I don’t enjoy being a mom right now.” She’s hoping Janet has some suggestions how to get through this very difficult period. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day trial membership (adbl.co/2OBVztZ). Paperbacks and e-books are available at Amazon. Also, her exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com). Our Sponsors:* Check out BabyQuip and use my code UNRUFFLED for a great deal: http://www.babyquip.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mom is at her wit's end and describes a series of challenging family separations and transitions, including the birth of a sibling. Now one of her twins yells and screams from morning until night. The other twin is defiant and “is always telling me ‘no’ and doing things he knows he’s not supposed to be doing.” This mom says their behavior is so extreme she spends most of the day in tears and then ends up yelling. She’s looking for Janet’s advice how she might deal with her twins’ behavior. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices