Overcome Pornography for Good

Tune in this week as I ask Dr. Julie Hanks your questions about your own faith challenges. We’re discussing some difficult topics, why it’s okay to struggle and not agree with every aspect of the LDS doctrine, and how to decide for yourself what is righteous and what the spirit is telling you. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/faith-challenges-dr-julie-hanks

If you feel like you’re never doing enough in your attempt to overcome pornography, or you’re starting to feel like you don’t care anymore and that’s adding to your feeling of shame, listen in this week. The shame apathy trap can make us think we just need to care more and do more, but I’m showing you how that’s the wrong place to focus on. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/shame-apathy-trap

In this episode, I’m sharing the #1 key to quitting pornography and showing you how to develop a skill that will allow you to accomplish great things in your life. I’m sharing the importance of feeling your emotions and why learning how to do this will completely change your life. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/key-to-quitting-pornography

Join me on the podcast this week as I put your questions to Lindsay Poelman around what to do if your partner is struggling with porn. Lindsay is sharing the story of how she found coaching, the difference it’s made in her marriage, and how you can empower yourself in navigating the ebbs and flows of a marriage. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/partner-struggling-porn-lindsay-poelman

Discover why the fear that so many people feel around quitting porn is not the motivator you need if you want to break the habit. I’m sharing why love and hope will always take you further than fear and how you can work on overcoming any fear around porn, so you can overcome pornography for good. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/fear-future

How to be more curious in your journey of overcoming pornography, and less judgmental. I’m sharing why curiosity will always move you through any process quicker than judgment, and what you can do to reframe those occasions when you do decide to view pornography despite trying to quit.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/curiosity-vs-judgment

Motivation doesn’t get you anywhere. Motivation doesn’t last, and truthfully, waiting on motivation will keep you from doing anything big, meaningful, or important with your life, and that includes quitting pornography. What you need is more commitment, and in this episode, I’m showing you how to cultivate the discipline and commitment required to change your pornography usage.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/commitment-vs-motivation

Join me on the podcast this week for a greater understanding of how your urges flow, and how to handle them when they come back time and again. You’ll discover how to live with the urge and analyze where it comes from, instead of getting caught up in negative thoughts because of your desire to view porn.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/urge-flow

Join me on the podcast this week to discover the principle of 50-50, and how understanding it will be key in overcoming pornography for good. I’m sharing where there is indisputable evidence that life is 50% positive and 50% negative, and how embracing it has changed my life and so many of my clients’ lives.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/50-50

Where our sexual shame comes from, and why no matter how much of it you feel, it’s never going to help you quit viewing porn or anything else. Instead, I’m sharing where to focus if you want to quit porn, and giving you some reasons that work for my clients, rather than trying to quit because they’re ashamed of themselves.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/sexual-shame

Why describing yourself as an addict might be making overcoming pornography even more difficult than it already is. I’m sharing how I classify an addiction, and I’m giving you the tools you need to change your self-concept, so you can start to become somebody who just doesn’t need porn to feel happy.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/self-concept-addiction

Discover what to do when you slip up. I’m discussing how to be the observer of what led to you viewing porn in the first place, and giving you questions so you can process the guilt that comes up for you before it turns into shame and self-loathing.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/when-you-slip-up

Discover why you have way more control over your desires than you might think. I’m sharing where the feelings of deprivation and desire come from, why your past attempts to quit porn have failed, and what you can do to give yourself some power in this situation and finally ditch the habit for good.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/deprivation

Join me on the podcast this week to discover how to embrace the discomfort of quitting pornography. I’m showing you the stories we tell ourselves that stop us from even really trying to do something we know is going to be difficult, and how to apply what you already know from other areas of your life to break your porn habit for good.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/when-its-really-difficult

Join me on the podcast this week to discover what is lying beneath the surface of your porn habit. I’m sharing the emotions I see coming up for my clients that they never wanted to see were at play. And once you can get clear on what’s causing the behavior you want to change, that’s when you can start working on overcoming pornography for good.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/iceberg-emotions

Discover why we should never feel negative emotion around our sexual urges. I’m sharing why these impulses are a matter of physiology, not morality, and how to neutralize the urge in your mind, so you can deal with it in a way that feels more aligned with how you want to live your life.Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/physiology-morality

Join me on the podcast this week to discover the differences between sins and weaknesses in the eyes of God. And when you understand this difference, you will be in a much better position to decide whether your habit is really a sin, or whether it’s just an area of human weakness that every single one of us experiences in some form or another.Get full show notes and more information here: sarabrewer.com/blog/sin-weakness

Something happens when you quit viewing porn that might catch you by surprise.When we quit, we expect to feel great, motivated, confident.In reality, when you quit porn, you will feel terrible. All of the stuff that you have been avoiding and buffering from will come to the forefront of your mind. You will feel all of the negative emotions that you’ve been avoiding.In today’s episode, I talk about what to do when that happens. Bring a notebook and take some notes!Sara 

In today's episode we talk about the label addiction.My personal opinion is that we use this term too liberally when it comes to porn, especially in LDS culture.Join me in the episode to learn the criteria I use when deciding if someone is addicted or not and how you can apply it to yourself.See you there!

In today's episode of Overcome Pornography for Good we talk about Situational Joy.Situational joy is waiting to feel joy until our situations are ideal. Situational joy shows up when we think, "i'll feel good once I lose the weight", "I'll feel good once I get the promotion", "I'll feel good once I get married", and of course, "I'll feel good once I quit pornography".There are a few problems with this way of thinking. It's not true. Our situations, our circumstances do not cause joy. We know this is true because many people view porn and feel joy. And feel confident. And feel good. Waiting to feel good until you quit porn actually keeps you from quitting porn. All of our actions come from our feelings, and so the better we feel, the better we show up. And vice-versa. The worse we feel, the worse we will show up. The best way to quit porn is to practice feeling what you would allow yourself to feel once you've already quit.Join me in today's episode to learn how.Work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In today's episode of Overcome Pornography for Good, we talk about the difference between fact and story.This is important, because the facts of your life do not determine your results. The story that you tell yourself determines your results.We dive into what this means specifically in regards to pornography.If you want a different life, you need to tell yourself a different story.I’ll teach you how to do that in this episode. Ready to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In today's episode we talk about why surrendering is such an important part of the process to quitting porn.I'm not talking about surrendering as in accepting defeat or accepting that pornography has power over you. I'm not talking about surrendering as in giving up. I'm talking about surrendering to the experience of being a human.We typically want to fight our urges to view pornography. Fighting is a sign of willpower, and willpower is never a long-term solution to quitting any habit, especially pornography. You don't need to fight anymore. Fighting is exhausting.Join me in today's episode to learn how to stop fighting and start surrendering. This will make your journey to quitting pornography much easier.Ready to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In today's episode we talk about all or nothing mindset. This is one of the most common things I see with my clients.All or nothing mindset looks like, “I already messed up today, so I am not going to try for the rest of the day”, “I can’t start until i’m 100% sure I can do this”, and by counting progress as number of days without pornography instead of counting progress as number of urges processed.In reality, quitting pornography is like learning any new skill. Failure does not keep us from quitting, it teaches us and helps us to become stronger as long as we learn from it.You will love this episode. Ready to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In today's episode we talk about shame spirals.It's important to stay connected to your emotions because your emotions cause your actions. Shame is not a useful emotion when it comes to quitting pornography or other habits. Shame always causes you to hide and avoid. Many people believe that shame is a motivator, when in fact it is the opposite. It is a de-motivater. You can not hate yourself into change.Shame comes from thoughts, not from looking at pornography. Shame comes from thoughts that have the underlying message of, "there is something wrong with me".We find ourselves in shame spirals when we 1. thing something is wrong with me 2. feel shame 3. hide and avoid. 4. view pornography to escape the shame --> and then starting the cycle all over.Join me in todays episode to learn how to combat this shame cycle!Ready to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In todays episode we talk about urges. Urges is another word for the feeling of desire. Many of you are afraid of urges because you think that if you feel an urge, you will look at pornography.I want to show you that urges are nothing to be afraid of.And I want to give you new tools to handling urges when you feel them.Join me in today's episode to learn how to stop fearing urges and how to stop giving into urges.Ready to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

In today's episode we talk about the identity you have taken on as a pornography viewer. Changing this identity is required for quitting pornography for good. In this episode we talk about how to change this identity.We also talk about limiting beliefs that keep you from quitting porn and how to change those beliefs. Some of these limiting beliefs are, "it's too hard to quit porn" "I like it too much" "I'm not strong enough to quit".As a celebration for the launch of the show, I am giving away one free adult electric scooter and three $50 Amazon gift cards. For details on entering the giveaway, go to sarabrewer.com/podcastlaunchIf you want to access my free training, visit https://www.sarabrewer.com/free-training-opt-in-pageReady to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. Visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

It today's episode we talk about over-desire. Over-desire is the reason that your urges feel automatic. Over-desire can be un-trained and un-learned. We talk about how in the show.You'll also learn my method for deciding if someone is addicted to pornography or not. I define addiction as a behavior that keeps you from living a normal, functioning life. Many of you call yourselves addicts even though you don't fit this description. I talk about why that might be harmful to you in this episode.As a celebration for the launch of the show, I am giving away one free adult electric scooter and three $50 Amazon gift cards. For details on entering the giveaway, go to sarabrewer.com/podcastlaunchIf you want to access my free training, visit https://www.sarabrewer.com/free-training-opt-in-pageReady to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme

Join me in today's episode as we talk about one main thing that is keeping you in a pornography habit, and that is your need to escape negative emotion."Pornography has nothing to do with sexual appetites and everything to do with escape"Understanding this will change everything for you.Join me in this episode to learn more!To access my free training, "How to Quit Viewing Pornography Even If You've Tried in the Past" visit https://www.sarabrewer.com/masterclassReady to commit to quitting pornography? I would love to be your coach. visit this link to work with me: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme