Leading Human

Today we speak with Justin Sainton, Elle Worsham, and Erin Maslowski. Enneagram 7s don't like constraints. They tend to want it all, and they have a lot of the tools for getting it. They're head types with the ability to solve a lot of problems through their own structures and spreadsheets. At the same time, they're upbeat and positive. They have loads of interests and plenty of energy.What could go wrong?Sometimes that can be a little complicated. One of the answers our panelists discuss is that trying to blind yourself to pain doesn't always work because life doesn't accommodate your avoidance. It still keeps coming. Also, sometimes being a Seven can be like a "river without banks." You need constraints and boundaries to stay contained and focused.As we conclude our first series of Enneagram panelists spanning the spectrum, Sevens discuss the joys and sorrows of being a Seven. Each of them is doing a lot of growth with their wings and arrows, passions and virtues. Each has their own way of engaging with the world. Today they give us a glimpse of that inner reality, and in vulnerability and discernment, show us a way forward.Time Stamps:1:38--Justin introduces himself3:23--Elle introduces herself6:30--Erin introduces herself9:38--Elle discusses the differences between how she communicates as a head type and her heart type partner12:24--Justin discusses how surprised he sometimes is by his analytical side because he is also constantly wanting to have fun, especially in the eyes of others14:28--Erin agrees with the other panelists but as a counter type (social 7), she also discusses the fear side of being in the thinking side of her own center of intelligence34:14--Elle talks about getting real through the virtue of Sobriety35:58--Justin says that as a 7 he can be like a river without banks37:06--The ego of the 7 is so blinded from pain40:00--How the panelists lean into their six and eight wings consciously and unconsciously45:47--How the arrow work helps in growth53:54--Coming back to mindful practicesThe Big Self Leadership Accelerator is open! We launch October 4, and we've saved a space for you. For details go to: bigselfschool.com/bslaReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

The Enneagram is so much more than a typology. It is so much more than a static symbol. In fact, the Enneagram is a living, breathing, dynamic process-driven system to self-observation and self-understanding. It helps you to understand yourself ("Know Thyself") at deeper level much faster than you ever could without it. It helps you to understand others.In today's episode, Shelley and Chad cover five proven approaches to going beyond just knowing your number. Knowing your number is a start, but then what about it? We discuss the concept and approach to (1) self-observation and why it's mission critical to begin here. Then, we hit on (2) centers of intelligence, (3) wings, (4) arrows, and (5) the passions and virtues as ways to integrate your understanding. Today's episode helps direct to patterns of conscious growth and to escape from your habitual and ingrained personality patterns that keep you stuck.Time Stamps:2:15--The growth paths we're going to cover today3:30--Self-observation is key to everything we teach4:20--And you can't know yourself until you see yourself5:00--We are machines8:04--Definition of Self-Observation14:38--Centers of Intelligence discused21:14--Wholeness is not achieved by cutting off a portion of one's being, but by integrating the contraries23:03--The moment everyone's been waiting for: wings28:34--The arrows can direct you in terms of big moves in your growth33:49--We also need to be filling up our knowledge bank, as well as what we're learning about ourselves34:18--Discussing the passions and the virtuesThe Big Self Leadership Accelerator is open! We launch October 4, and we've saved a space for you. For details go to: bigselfschool.com/bslaReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we speak with Suzy Anthony, Marta Gillilan, and Roger Coles.We discuss what it's like getting into the heads of Sixes. Sixes are sometimes named the Loyalist, and sometimes the Skeptical Troubleshooter. Their archetype centers on a person who seeks security and certainty, but ironically often doesn't find it. Of all the personality types, Sixes are the most loyal to their friends and their beliefs and ideas. At the same time, it's easy to break trust with them if you don't pass their sniff test. And they do find themselves testing others even when they don't always consciously realize it.They tend to look at all scenarios in order to locate potential problems. They ask lots of questions, and look for weak points. Sixes are always aware of their anxieties and are looking for ways to construct security supports. In today's episode we have three Sixes--one for each subtype (we think). These Sixes are vulnerable and open about what it's like to be them, and the work they've done on themselves to work on their growth paths. We discuss all this and much more on this week's Enneagram Six episode.Time Stamps::52--Suzy introduces herself2:20--Marta introduces herself5:30--Roger introduces herself8:12--Talking the head type center of intelligence and the voices in their heads19:42--How they test their reactions24:42--Struggling to trust31:53--Struggling with fear34:09--Marta opens up about her experience in dealing with cancer with both her parents and with her husband39:40--Sixes are great truth-tellers, and how do they step into their courage46:58--Shelley confuses Hamlet for Frodo55:12--Shelley asks each Six to discuss one thing they're working onThe Big Self Leadership Accelerator is open! We launch October 4, and we've saved a space for you. For details go to: bigselfschool.com/bslaReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we speak with Richie Daigle and Chris Schoolcraft, two Fives who have done a lot of work to under their personalities and how they show up in the world.We discuss what it's like being a headtype as our center of intelligence, and how they hold on to their knowledge and skills and share it only when they feel completely ready.Fives highly value working independently. They're more comfortable with data and facts than with people and emotions. They also tend to see the work they do through the lens of information that needs to be mastered in order to get the job done. Fives sincerely enjoy learning and you can count them to provide a high level of expertise and authoritative information when given the time to prepare. They also make for good listeners and you can count on them to stay focused on their tasks.We discuss all this and much more on this week's Enneagram Five episode.Time Stamps:1:16--Richie Daigle introduces himself3:35--Chris Schoolcraft introduces himself5:52--Richie discusses what it was like being in his head as a semi-professional baseball player8:05--Chris talks about being disconnected from his heart and body (as a head type)16:25--Richie says he feels like Fives need a certain sense of control20:50--It's like being out on a frozen pond and not being sure the ice can hold28:59--Having had people encroach on their boundaries, Fives can sense from a long way away if someone is being nosy34:02--Shelley asks the panelists about the passion of Avarice38:42--The idea of being prepared is really important42:45--Chris discusses how he may avoid things by generating a defense of indifference47:55--Chris has tried to trust more and think less when it comes to his growth path51:33--Richie talks about getting stuck within feedback loopsThe Big Self Leadership Accelerator is open! We launch October 4, and we've saved a space for you. For details go to: bigselfschool.com/bslaReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we speak with Shay and Amanda, along with our very own Chad. We all know how special Fours are, and how much they fear being anything but ordinary. But it's not every day we get to hear the perspectives from two self-preservation subtypes and one relational (one-to-one) subtype at the same time. We discuss what it's like being a heart type as our center of intelligence, how the subtypes really opened up our self-understanding, and the concept of envy. Fours are constantly feeling what they're missing both consciously and unconsciously. Fours highly value authenticity. They are also image focused, but not in a self-absorbed way as some may think. The lens is turned in on themselves a great deal. They have superpowers with empathy, but sometimes when they turn the introjection upon themselves, they can become moody or melancholic, even angry, as they take on the feelings and impressions from others. We discuss all this and much more on this week's Enneagram Four episode.Time Stamps:1:54--Shay Bocks introduces herself4:05--Amanda introduces herself7:36--Chad discusses how he knew pretty much right away that he was a Four, but it was discovering the subtype that really helped11:00--Amanda talks about how it is as a heart type being married to a body type17:20--Amanda agrees with Shay about the image focus of the fours and how it manifests22:50--Amanda picks up on what Chad said about the way he had become angry among his peers when he wasn't being recognized for his value and contribution. She discusses how you just want to feel like there's a place for you in the world.27:10--Shay helps us understand the concept of introjection by beginning with the more commonly understood idea of projection36:18--The masochism comes in for the Fours when they take on the emotions of everyone else and with no clear outlet45:47--Chad discusses a growth path that he is currently on46:46--Shay starts with her growth path and Amanda follows (they encourage everyone to check out the CPEnneagram with Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes)49:10--Shay talks about her meditation of a burning bushThe Big Self Leadership Accelerator is open! We launch October 4, and we've saved a space for you. For details go to: bigselfschool.com/bslaReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we’re answering some of your fantastic questions, and it is making for a great show. Could you give us more background on the history of the Enneagram? We give credit to a 20th-century pioneer of the Traditional Enneagram, Oscar Ichazo. We also briefly touch on the influences and how it reached the west.Interesting sidenote: According to Gurdjieff’s student JG Bennett, the Enneagram was developed in the 15th century by mathematicians in the Sarmoun mystery school to express principles symbolized by the newly discovered decimal point. The Enneagram as a symbol represents aspects of mathematical laws — law of three, law of seven, law of one.Could you tell us a little more about what the sub-types are about? Among other things, we discuss the three basic instincts, why they tend to be overlooked in North American teaching of the Enneagram, and how the combination of your type and instinct comprise what we call the sub-type.What is the value or point of the Enneagram besides recognizing your type?We love this question because it’s something we all consciously or unconsciously wonder about as we begin to learn more about ourselves in really any format, any personality typology. In fact, the more we learned about the Enneagram from its many teachers, and the more we understood about ourselves and others as we are in personality, the more we realized that learning our type was just the beginning. It alone is not the point. We are machines, and we live our lives on autopilot. Whether it’s our habits and patterns, our negative emotion traps, our inability to see ourselves clearly, identification, we live our lives unconsciously. We are asleep to ourselves. Also, it:Moves you out of your machinery, wakes you up (use only if you're into self-development work) can actually be detrimental to identify type and leave it there, double down on your patterns, shameHelps you grow efficiently and shows you your personalized path for growing Identifies blind spots that you can’t seeTime Stamps:3:25--Who Oscar Ichazo is5:40--George Gurdjieff gets a lot of credit for bringing the Enneagram to the West, and why9:39--To see where the Enneagram is now and give Claudio Narajano credit for his contributions14:23--The sub-type piece of the conversation is often left out in the U.S.20:19--Why did Chad believe certain sub-types were associated with being introverted or extroverted28:28--Shelley really wants people to start understanding their sub-types as a piece of their self-understanding32:14--We are asleep to ourselves36:50--Why could it be dangerous to only use the Enneagram as a typing system and stop there38:03--What Gurdjieff said you will get from becoming one of his students40:17--The Enneagram reveals things you didn't even know were self-sabotaging youReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Our two Enneagram 3 panelists this week have done a great deal of work on themselves. While Jim Gum certainly has done a tremendous amount of work over his 30 years of working with the Enneagram, Steph Barron Hall's six years or so has brought her a long way as well. If you are ready to learn your Enneagram type and what to do with it, we have a giveaway for you! We’re offering a free Enneagram typing package to a lucky someone who gives us a review on iTunes or Spotify. These typing packages are valued at $375, and include an interview, a proprietary test, and one follow up coaching session. So you heard it here: if you go to iTunes or Spotify and search for The Big Self Podcast and leave us a review, you can enter into a giveaway to get a free Enneagram typing package.After you leave us a review, go to BigSelfSchool.com/enneagramgiveaway and fill out the form so you can be entered to win.Time Stamps:1:25--Jim Gum introduces himself3:42--Steph Barron Hall introduces herself7:41--30 years ago, Jim discusses the intense emotional conflict he was experiencing before he learned about the Enneagram12:30--Steph discusses the validation she felt that 3s are potentially the most emotional type of all18:55--Steph agrees with Jim's point about feeling fragile, and goes on to explain her experience as an Instagrammer33:55--Jim discusses how he has grown out of always having to do something even on his time off40:41--Jim discusses the Thomas Merton prayer that he's memorizing, and also the concept of deceit and how that plays into our lives (and specific to 3s)53:35--Steph discusses the importance of self-compassion for her inner growth62:30--How 3s are so misunderstoodReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shelley is super excited to introduce you today to her brother and sisters of the Enneagram type Two. These are her people. If you are ready to learn your Enneagram type and what to do with it, we have a giveaway for you! We’re offering a free Enneagram typing package to a lucky someone who gives us a review on iTunes or spotify. These typing packages are valued at $375, and include an interview, a proprietary test, and one follow up coaching session. So you heard it here: if you go to iTunes or Spotify and search for The Big Self Podcast and leave us a review, you can enter into a giveaway to get a free Enneagram typing package.After you leave us a review, go to BigSelfSchool.com/enneagramgiveaway and fill out the form so you can be entered to win.Time Stamps:0:50--Carolyn Swora introduces herself2:34--Ashton Whitmoyer-Ober introduces herself4:56--Jonathon Bow introduces himself7:15--What it means to be a heart type14:27--The definable characteristics of a Two25:23--Core fear that Twos are not really lovable35:28--The passion of pride in the Two43:10--Talking about the growth points of the Two57:10--Jonathan talks about the importance of boundaries60:00--Carolyn brings up the idea of slowing down and listeningReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Type 1s are known as Reformers or Perfectionists. They're also body types, and when it comes to relating to others they can house a lot of energy inside themselves, often in the form of anger. In this episode's discussion, we meet Angie Liski, Kristi Rider, and Randa Hinton. We learn a little more about what makes these types tick, especially when it comes to dealing with anger and the inner critic.*The sound quality on this episode is sub-standard, and we apologize for the issues which have been addressed in all other panelist interviews in this series.Time Stamps:2:00--Kristi Rider introduces herself3:50--Angie Lisky introduces herself6:05--Randa Hinton introduces herself8:16--How Randa carries "the weight of the world" in herself and how learning about how 1s are body types have helped her understand and transcend being a body type9:59--How Angie channels her anger and how it works in the body11:45--How for Kristi being a body type means knowing things quickly13:41--How does being a 1 translate into their work and leadership19:50--How do 1s deal with their inner critic32:05--A brief discussion of the varieties of subtypes in 1s37:08--The virtue of SerenityReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shelley speaks with two leaders who recognize the 9 within themselves. These two leaders, Suzanna Cooper and Lesley Scarce, have been working on their personal inner growth through the lens of the Enneagram for years now. They offer their deep insights into what it means to function as a body type, how they work with anger, and how they do or don't "self-forget." What does it mean for leaders when they're willing to do the self-development work themselves? Does it really benefit everyone? Is it possible to be vulnerable as a leader with your team? How does it impact their personal relationships as well as their professional?We bring new levels of awareness and personal growth to you through the multi-faceted lens of the Enneagram. We bring you experts and leaders from all the stratification of personality types and human experiences.Time Stamps:2:24--Suzanna introduces herself3:35--Lesley Scarce introduces herself6:37--Shelley asks the panelists what it's like to be a body type10:42--Shelley asks the panelists how aware they are of when the process of body awareness is happening18:49--Shelley asks the panelists if they'd be willing to talk about their anger22:40--The 9s adaptive strategy is to fall asleep to themselves32:27--The passion of the 9s is the "sloth," also described as self-forgetting40:00--When we do the inner work on ourselves, it builds trust with the team45:55--When we do the work everyone around us benefits. Shelley asks the panelists what they've experienced as leaders when they've done the self work of personal inner growthReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

The Big Self Podcast is set to challenge you with everything you know about the Enneagram. Or at least everything you think you know about yourself through the Enneagram as a system for your whole self. On this week's episode we feature three 8s, and whether you think of them as Challengers or not, see what the spectrum of their sub-types reveals. Enneagram 8s are a gut (body) type, and they lead us off on our series of the depth and breadth of the Enneagram. Next week, we represent the 9s. Thanks for tuning in and joining us on our self-development journey. The journey never ends, and there's plenty of work in front of you right now. Learn with us, and we'll see you on the other side.Time Stamps:1:51--Jared Byas introduces himself 3:15--Stacey Ruff introduces herself5:52--Jessica Dickson introduces herself15:30--Discussing the "gut" (or body) type of reaction26:40--How 8s deal with conflict40:40--How 8s are dealing with that inner wounded child43:11--How being tough and strong does not always serve you well51:47--The decision to stop with perfectionism55:45--How 8s work with their passion of lust, and their virtue of innocence66:46--How arrrows are quite importantReady to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shelley and Chad aren't going to ask anyone else to do what they aren't willing to do themselves. In this episode, Chad puts Shelley on the hot seat. He grills her on what it means to be a 2 with a subtype of self-preservation. She defaults to pride when it comes to her relationships, and a growth path for her revolves around humility. Just how vulnerable will Shelley allow herself to be? As a 2, she is good at listening to others and letting them open up, but part of the unconscious strategy is to avoid having to reveal much about herself. Can Chad crack the Shelley code and get her to cry at least once? Tune in to find out all this and more on this second week of Enneagram hot seats featuring Big Self Co-Founders, Chad and Shelley Prevost. Next week, we dive into our panels discussing their types, what makes them ticks, what are their motivations, how do they function in work settings, where are their weaknesses and virtues.Time Stamps:2:50--What does Shelley think about the rising popularity of the Enneagram?6:34--Heart types15:01--The passion of pride, and how 2s have to work on this21:20--How Shelley defaults in acute stress29:01--How Shelley works with her arrows point at her 4 and 835:00--How Shelley sometimes has to name her emotions36:35--How Shelley began to get traction with the Enneagram as a tool for growth when she gave herself to the system of the Enneagram Ready to unlock your potential? Check out our Enneagram Guide at bigselfschool.com/enneagram.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shelley and Chad aren't going to ask anyone else to do what they aren't willing to do themselves. In this episode, Shelley puts Chad on the hot seat. What has the Enneagram taught him about himself? What insights has it led to for personal growth? Where is he aware he still has work to do? What's so special about an Enneagram 4 (sexual subtype) anyway? Will Chad crack under the pressure? All this and more on today's special Enneagram deep dive.Time Stamps:3:35-How fours need to think they're special9:37-Overview of the heart, head, and body types11:40-How sadness shows up for fours13:08-How learning the subtypes really helped in understanding exactly who Chad was17:40-How authenticity feels for a four22:40-The issue of inferiority versus superiority26:17-Dealing with the humility of failure45:50-The growth path as Chad currently sees it54:13-The arrows in growth and stress for a fourLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

This week we speak with Dan Cumberland, the CEO of UpsideBuilders and Host of The Meaning Movement to talk about how we can get more out of a career change. Dan is on a mission to 'shake people awake' when it comes to their careers and what they want to do with their lives. There is a common misconception that your career is where your purpose is found when in fact, what you do for work is simply an opportunity to flex the muscles of what makes you happy, what fulfills you. Time Stamps:4:00: Dan realized that the youth ministry wasn't for him7:49: What are the voices that are misguiding12:03: What is your working definition of calling19:11: So how does that fit into your framework and how you think about callings29:50: I don't think failure is necessary, but I but it's, there's usually that inciting incident and to use that language again, that's like something that pushes us over the edge.36:57: I am extremely relational and emotionalLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Gregg Levoy writes that we must be willing to get shaken up, “to submit ourselves to the dark blossoming of chaos” in order to continue growing. People tend to search for answers about their purpose more when they’re confronted by a problem, or when there is something uncomfortable in their life. Levoy has written from a multifaceted lens about calling. "Listen from down below if you want to hear from above," says Levoy. On this week's episode in the Callings series, Levoy shares his wisdom on everything from how to invoke your call, to whether a call is a right or a privilege, to how to listen, and even the consequences of following your call or NOT following.Time Stamps:2:15: How do you invoke a call?7:05: Gregg's definition of callings12:15: The wonderful Jewish proverb about listening from below to hear from above18:40: Is it a privilege to pursue one's call in the first place?21:15: Most people know it when they're in alignment with themselves26:30: An example of someone who just stuck with it34:27: On maybe not meditating some times44:22: On managing paradox betterFind Gregg and his book, Callings, at his site here.If you’re interested in callings go to Big Self School.com/corevalues and download the free activity we’ve created for you to get clear on your core values. It’s fun. It takes 15 minutes, and we believe core values are a critical component of your callings work.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Many people never discern their callings. On this week's Big Self Podcast we discuss what people misunderstand or resist about understanding and interpreting their calling (or sense of purpose and fulfillment in life). We touch on whether or not you have one True Call (with a capital C), whether or not your calling is really your vocation, as well as what it means to trust your intuition and embrace your shadow side. This bonus episode was originally a LIVE episode on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. We are happy to bring it to you as a follow-up to an earlier episode where we discuss your five (count 'em, five) callings.Knowing what you value is a critical first step in discerning your callings because it’s an indispensable part of knowing who you are. Your values tether you to your authentic self and they illuminate the way you should go. Download the Core Values workbook for free to get started.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Jerry Colonna is a professional coach, known for his unique teachings on entrepreneurship and business psychology. He is a co-founder and CEO of the executive coaching and leadership development company, Reboot and is the host of the Reboot Podcast if you’re looking for another great podcast. Among other things, he teaches leaders to embrace extreme challenges (as opposed to avoidance) and take time to discover the 'self' through introspection. His book Reboot: Leadership and the Art of Growing Up is a must-read.In this episode, you get a clear picture of how Jerry coaches, his concept of radical inquiry, and he offers his insights into how to do more while maintaining the practice of remaining your authentic self.Time Stamps:1:15: Shelley says, "I think I'm gonna cry" while welcoming Jerry to the show4:45: Shelley asks Jerry to share about his own crucible moment12:53: Jerry brings the conversation back to "calling"15:15: Shelley asks Jerry if it took failure in order to come to the learning point moment20:32: Jerry discusses listening to the inner voice and even gives it a name25:35: Chad asks Jerry a complicated series of questions on calling and listening to the inner voice, and Jerry attempts to tie it altogether33:35: Shelley talks about having a "death grip" on what she thought she was supposed to do35:00: Failure is not necessary, the question is how you respond to life eventsLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shelley and Chad kick off Season 2 with a series on "callings." In this week's episode, the co-hosts tee off the subject with their own working definition of what calling is and then dive into their own five-part framework for how to discern and build your callings.Let us hear your calling stories. What are the most inspiring stories of people who have clearly found their callings? In what ways would you say you have found your calling already? How do you know who you are already? In what ways would you say you are still looking for your calling?If you’re interested in callings go to Big Self School.com/corevalues and download the free activity we’ve created for you to get clear on your core values. It’s fun. It takes 15 minutes, and we believe core values are a critical component of your callings work.Time Stamps:4:14: Your callings are the experiences you co-create with something bigger than yourself.6:45: The five ways you are called, starting with you are called to grow12:53: You are called to connect16:20: You are called to contribute21:36: You are called to play26:17: You are called to create27:57: Entering a flow stateLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Although Tara Well calls herself a “mirror-gazing expert,” what this really means is that she helps people find a way back into themselves. She does that by teaching self-compassion through Mirror Meditation.After many years of disregarding her feelings, Tara found that something as simple as looking into the mirror can help with self-awareness and emotional regulation. Now, she shares her method with others — and it seems to be working miracles.But those miracles are well-backed by science. Tara is an associate psychology professor at Barnard College of Columbia University, where she teaches the theoretical base for her mirror work. On top of that, she writes a column for Psychology Today called The Clarity.Time Stamp:2:41 Tara explains Mirror Meditation 5:47 Tara shares the challenges that people face with Mirror Meditation 10:49 Self awareness and body awareness as part of Mirror Meditation 13:09 The first shift Tara sees in her clients once they start Mirror Meditation 15:35  Finding your true self under the layer of self criticism 17:45 The power of self talk and techniques to manage your inner critic 19:22 The technique of video journaling 26:53 Video journaling and its impact on image management 31:36 The mirror and narcissism 38:10 Tara shares how people react when she tells them that she is a Mirror Gazing Expert 39:36 Shelley shares a quote from Joseph Campbell 41:51 Tara shares about her book and where you can find her Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Jordan believes that personal development is a never-ending process of imagining who you want to be, interpreting why you want to be that person, creating a plan to get there, and then implementing that plan in the most enjoyable and fulfilling way possible.He helps guide people to think differently and make daring changes in their lives. Jordan is trailblazing in the personal development field by using creative storytelling to allow people to gather their own insights from the characters he creates and the stories he shares.He’s a former startup founder, restaurant manager, and soccer goalie. A solopreneur, podcast host, and 2x TEDx speaker, he is also the #1 bestselling author of Getting COMFY: Your Morning Guide to Daily Happiness and The Journey to Cloud Nine.Freebie from Jordan: 61 of the Best Personal Development Books Summarized in One Sentence.Time Stamps:2:20 Jordan shares about his soccer journey and the experience of close but no cigar9:27 How that same theme carried over into his experience when trying to get a consulting job 11:46 Jordan shares what these experiences revealed to him about life 13:34 How this experience led him to where he is today 18:06 The conversation shifts to the topic of luck 21:17 Jordan shares his life motto22:33 Shelley shares a story that speaks to the power of reframing and rethinking about challenges in life26.22 Three ways to redirect when things aren’t working out 28:54 Shelley talks more deeply about failure and ego30:36 Jordan explains why he is more open to failure at this point in his life 32:29 Jordan shares about his morning routine and explains the C.O.M.F.Y acronym  38:59 His No News Challenge41:32 Where to find Jordan Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Emily is a master certified coach who specializes in executive leadership and career coaching. She has seventeen years of corporate human resources experience; practical experience from more than 2,500 hours of coaching; and a deep understanding of the human mind, spirit, and potential. Chad: Her clients range from seasoned executives to emerging leaders, to career changers who utilize her support to close the gap between where they are and where they want to be. Emily’s ontological approach allows individuals to clarify their goals, shift beliefs and habits, take risks, execute brilliance, and make quantum leaps rather than incremental improvements. Check her out here, or go straight to her book, The New Golden Rule.Time Stamps:1:48 Emily shares about the new golden rule 3:53 Emily talks about the bumpy road that got her to discover the new golden rule 9:18 Emily shares how her real transformation happened when she learned to ask for support 11:46 The new golden rule as a unisex message and how men struggle with this as well 14:55 How to know what you really need17:52 Emily explains why it’s so important to retrain the people in our lives 19:29 Emily shares her fundamental belief that there are two sides of self 23:22 How to find the confidence to clarify your needs, communicate them and maintain them24:42 We discuss fear of failure 26:24 Shifting to a growth mindset and committing to the work over looking for a quick fix 27:40 The importance of community 30:56 Emily talks about the importance of self awareness 33:27 Emily shares about her book: The New Golden Rule 35:21 Emily shares the practice and routines that work for her 38:21 Where to find Emily  Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Kevin M. Johnson’s work is on the recovery of the space outside of ego, so our work in Big Self School swims in the same waters. Kevin is a teacher, retreat director, and co-host of the podcast Encountering Silence. Having spent years achieving a number of advanced degrees, speaking at large academic conferences, and even presenting at prestigious schools like Yale and Harvard Universities, he discovered he needed to walk a bit outside the halls of the Academy to explore deeper.Although he continues to teach at the university level, he now jokingly refers to himself as “a recovering academic” who teaches online and in various settings outside the university that often crosses boundaries into spaces that are not currently on our cultural maps.Kevin is looking to recover a space for holistic wellness and wisdom. Somewhere in the intersection of spirituality, psychology, wellness, self-help, and philosophy. A space that does not fit in easily on our current cultural maps. Find out more about Kevin at his website and at his podcast, Encountering Silence.Time Stamps:2:15 Kevin explains why he refers to himself as a recovering academic 6:15 Kevin talks about the mental map and the difference between how we think about things today versus the past 12:06 We discuss Seneca and Stoicism 14:23 The philosophy conversation continues17:36 Kevin shares the essential parts of what it means to be human and how it has been left out of our cultural map 21:06 Kevin talks about silence and why it is so essential 22:41 Kevin leads us through an exercise 26:01 Silence and our inner critic 28:23 Kevin answers the question ‘what makes us ready for silence?’ 34:48 We discuss the intimacy of silence with ourselves and others 37:43 What silence actually allows us to see 41:34 Kevin shares two simple things you can do to help you feel more connected 45:20 Shelley shares a Parker Palmer quote that she loves 47:37 Where to find Kevin Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Caterina Kostoula is an executive coach and founder of The Leaderpath. Her mission is to coach pioneering leaders and teams for meaningful impact and fulfillment.​Prior to The Leaderpath, Caterina was a Global Business Leader at Google. She managed some of the company's largest C-level partnerships. She was also an internal coach, awarded a 5-star-rating distinction from her coachees. Caterina has coached leaders from Google, Amazon, Vodafone, Ferrero, ArcelorMittal, Workable, and several entrepreneurs. She collaborates with INSEAD, coaching Executive MBAs and alumni. She is a member of the Forbes Coaches Council.Caterina has lived in more than seven countries across America, Europe, and Asia. She now lives in London.https://www.theleaderpath.com/https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6741992273124433920/https://www.theleaderpath.com/single-post/2019/11/04/Success-feels-easy-when-you-are-on-the-right-trackFreebie: www.theleaderpath.com/mindsetTime Stamps: 2:17 Caterina shares how team coaching set her on the path to writing her book 5:17 She explains the idea behind her 4 D’s Framework for meetings8:13 Caterina discusses the importance of trust in meetings and how to foster that trust 11:14 The most common mistakes people make in meetings 13:02 Caterina shares about the myth of the lonely genius 15:19 Caterina outlines 3 reasons not to have a meeting 18:20 We discuss ego management 21:07 Caterina answers how she coaches her clients on the difference between when to push through the hard and when to opt out 23:04 Shelley shares a quote from her favorite book and how it relates to the illusion of struggle 25:45 We discuss burnout and the dangerous myth of associating struggle with success28:03 Caterina shares how she coaches about failure 32:05 Caterina explains Leaderpath33:48 Caterina shares about her book, Hold Successful Meetings, available now for pre-orderLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

A large part of holistic healing and being an upper cervical chiropractic practitioner is helping people manage pain, often chronic pain. What role does stress play in people’s pain? What is something Chris sees again and again and that he sees as vital to helping people manage their stress (and their pain)?Today’s guest is Dr. Chris Collins. He received his doctor of chiropractic degree from Sherman College of Chiropractic in Spartanburg, SC. He received his bachelor’s degree in Exercise Science from University of Southern Mississippi, and has a background in exercise physiology and cardiopulmonary rehabilitation. Chris has advanced training in Knee Chest Upper Cervical Technique, which is one of the most researched, and advanced applications of chiropractic today. We met Chris through the Big Self School, so we can honestly say that Chris is a verified Big Selfer. Chris has a big heart and wants to help build communities where people have access to everything they need to lead a healthy life.Time Stamps:4:22 Chris shares his vision for his community in Chattanooga 5:58 How to form connection mindfully 7:22 We discuss community and the importance of boundaries 11:58 The risk of connection and setting expectations 14:08 Chris talks about how his practice changed when he discovered that his chiropractic patients with chronic conditions all had an underlying relationship with stress 18:22 Chris shares the story about when his morning started with a Tik Tok video and the impact it had on his day 25:17 Chris makes a powerful point about managing stressful moments 26:33 We discuss emotional vulnerability 31:46 Chad shares why he was reluctant to become a chiropractic doctor and what shifted for him 36:04 Recommended healthy practices to process stress 42:35 Where to find Chris Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Michael Thompson grew up with severe social anxiety and a stutter. He tells us about what that was like, and then what he did when he finally decided to take on a job that was going to challenge him in a whole new way.He applies his lessons in coaching his clients to overcome obstacles. Some people say maximize your strengths, Michael, on the other hand, takes the bull by the horns and addresses pain points as growth opportunities.He also tells us the story about the day he lost $250,000. How did it happen? What was his response?Michael Thompson is a career strategist who works with business professionals and entrepreneurs to open more doors and receive greater satisfaction from their work.As a communication coach he helps business executives and entrepreneurs be successful by making the right connections. As a career coach, he’s worked with over 250+ individuals from recent college graduates to CEOs of multinationals and award-winning creatives to take the right small steps to reach their next big goal.Time Stamps:1:29 Michael tells his story of growing up with a severe stutter and social anxiety 3:27 Michael shares what he learned about leadership from his experience 5:59 How stuttering taught Michael the importance of giving people room to lead themselves 9:10 Michael shares his advice for what builds confidence 11:49 We discuss the necessary balance of living in our strengths but also doing the things that scare us 15:20 the IKEA effect and the craftsman mindset 16:23 Michael shares the story about the day he lost $250,00021:10 What his experiences taught him about happiness 22:59 Michael shares an update on how his coaching clients are doing through the pandemic in Spain 26:50 How to develop your self-awareness in just 4 minutes a day 32:55 Michael shares the practices and routines that keep him focused on growth in his life  38:18 Michael reveals a productivity tip he learned that serves as a reminder that we have a life and not a career 40:02 Where to find Michael Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

We talk about shifting your mindset into a lifestyle of sustained, healthy practices. From meditating to journaling, hot and cold water therapy to the outer impact of what we're doing to the planet, this conversation packs a punch. It's the very end of a wild and difficult year and this episode leaves you with lots to process and be hopeful for as we veer into a new year. Will it be a whole new you? Why not you?Janna Breslin was born and raised in Southern California and is a former pharmaceutical representative for one of the leading Pharmaceutical companies in the world. After battling multiple health issues and realizing she could heal herself with food and nutrition, she discovered a passion for helping others achieve optimal health. Janna is now a well-known fitness model, certified personal trainer, health coach, and nutrition expert.Evan DeMarco is a leading sports medicine and nutrition expert, published author, public speaker and frequent guest on television, radio, and digital platforms. Evan returned to school to study bio- and organic chemistry and went on to develop a vastly improved formula for prenatal supplements delivered in liquid form after finding out he was going to be a father. From there he worked to develop numerous ingredient technologies to improve brain function in infants, children and adults. https://completehuman.com/2019/12/23/aboutus/https://www.amazon.com/Mia-Go-Away-Monster-Spray/dp/1098342798Time Stamps:2:14 Evan explains epigenetics 3:44 Evan shares the four pillars of epigenetics 6:33 We discuss radical responsibility 9:04 Our ego and radical responsibility 12:16 Evan and Janna share how to establish and maintain good habits 14:17 The impact of reframing the idea of habits as creating a lifestyle 16:07 Janna and Evan share their why and how they connect it to their daily practices19:55 The impact of stress and suggestions to modify your lifestyle to decrease stressors 21:53 Evan shares some scary stats about social media consumption and the impact it’s having on our stress levels and our health 27:41 Janna and Evan share more about the inner work they do and how it translates into their outer work 34:09 We talk about the practice of gratitude 36:42 Janna discusses empaths and shares her recommendations for recharging 39:40 The power of the negative ions of water for empathic people 43:56 Evan shares about the children’s book he just published and about how the proceeds are going to fight human trafficking 47:54 Where to find Evan and Janna 48:07 Evan shares about their product line and their missionLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we bring you Melody Wilding, an executive and leadership coach for smart, sensitive high-achievers who are tired of getting in their own way. Through her private one-on-one coaching program, talks, small-group workshops, and articles, she helps you break free from self-doubt and overwhelm, master your emotions, and use your sensitivity as the superpower that it is. Recently named one of Business Insider’s “Most Innovative Coaches”, Melody coined the groundbreaking idea of “sensitive striving.” She has helped CEOs, leaders, and top-performers at the world’s most successful companies including Google, Facebook, JP Morgan, Verizon and more. Her work has been featured on The New York Times, The Oprah Magazine, NBC News, and dozens of other high-profile publications.She currently teaches Human Behavior at Hunter College and is a columnist for magazines such as Inc. and Forbes.Time Stamps:2:50 Melody explains what it means to be a Sensitive Striver 12:18 Melody shares the 1st of 6 key qualities that make up being a Sensitive Striver: Sensitivity 17:02 Melody shares the 2nd key quality of a Sensitive Striver: Thoughtfulness 17:57 Shelley relates the 2nd key quality of thoughtfulness to her Enneagram type 20:00 We discuss the 3rd quality of a Sensitive Striver: Responsibility 21:40 Inner Drive as the 4th quality of a Sensitive Striver 24:19 Vigilance as the 5th quality of a Sensitive Striver 27:13 Melody shares the 6th and final quality of a Sensitive Striver: Emotionality 28:39 The number one challenge Melody sees in her client: Imposter Syndrome 30:35 Melody discusses how she coaches someone to step into their power 31:42 Melody shares her hack for dealing with negative self-talk 33:51 The discussion dives deeper into Imposter Syndrome37:25 Melody shares how her practices of theming her days, limiting decision fatigue and doing a weekly CEO report  help her flourish as a Sensitive Striver41:05 Melody shares about her upcoming book: Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work 42:00 Where to find Melody Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Melissa Gratias, a Ph.D. in organizational psychology, is an international speaker, coach, blogger, and author. For more than 20 years, Melissa’s coaching and consulting work has improved productivity for multinational, billion-dollar companies as well as individual solopreneurs. She creates workable systems so people can accomplish their professional goals in less time and with less stress. As a result, thousands of business owners, CEOs, and other overwhelmed professionals have become more focused, effective, and balanced in their lives and work. You know a lot of people listening may feel a sense of burnout already, and the very idea of trying to be more productive might sound off-putting. People don’t just want to be the sum total of what they get done. We also know--and what Melissa helps people she coaches to try and understand--is that productivity problems are basically people problems. We don’t always understand why we’re not getting more done with our time even when we want to. Melissa discusses how she helps people frame their “Why?” behind the issues that get in the way of their productivity.Time Stamps:2:27 Melissa shares what led her to organizational psychology, specifically the area of productivity 4:46 Melissa answers why determining your why is so important to being productive 8:36 Melissa reveals the biggest productivity problem that she sees: perfectionism 11:26 Shelley asks Melissa how she would define being productive 14:13 Your to-do list is crystal ball that predicts your future 16:20 Melissa shares why she doesn’t use the word habits with her clients and how she relates habits to Shawshank Redemption 18:08 Melissa explains the power behind rituals and why she encourages her clients to establish intentional rituals over habits 19:19 How you can use rituals to launch you into tasks that you typically procrastinate 22:13 Productivity as a mindset 23:42 Shelley has an a-ha moment 26:47 Melissa shares some recommended practices for productivity 30:57 We discuss the concept of micro-moments and how to handle competing priorities 36:46 Melissa shares the productivity tip that works best for her37.48 Where to find Melissa Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Omar Itani thought he had all the time in the world, until one day he found himself blacked out on the street, broken from an accident, unable to walk. It shook him to the core and reminded him that there’s more to life than just merely living—there’s the unparalleled thrill of ‘feeling alive’. So as soon as he recovered, he took a leap of faith, he left his job at Google and stopped talking about starting a business, or traveling around the world, or becoming a writer. Instead, he just did.Omar Itani is a writer, an ex-Google, founder of Lovers of The Sea, and an advocate for doing meaningful work that sprouts from purpose-driven creativity. His work has been featured in Thrive Global and major Medium publications such as Mind Café, The Startup, and P.S. I Love You. He has lived in six countries, traveled to over 40, and is a certified diver and sailor. He has a background in Marketing and holds a Master’s of Science in International Business from Ivey Business School & CEMS Global Alliance.Time Stamps: 2:20 Omar shares how an accident that left him unable to walk shifted his perspective on life and helped him transition from always talking about the things he wanted to do in life  to actually doing them  4:31 Shelley discusses the idea of mortality motivation 6:35 Omar shares how reading Atomic Habits by James Clear made him realize that the transformation he was looking for needed to start with change on the inside 9:28 Omar shares about his realization that in order to create sustainable change and master your craft, you have to be willing to stick with something for the long term 11:17 We discuss the importance of falling in love with the process and not the outcome 12:51 Omar explains his philosophy that real happiness comes from the alignment  between being and thinking and doing 14:40 We discuss the struggle of just ‘being’ in a culture where we are always doing 15:59 Omar gives advice and practical tips for getting into the ‘being’ state 18:55 Omar explains his life philosophy of slow living 24:50 We discuss the definition of success30:34 The conversation continues to explore the idea of abundance when you are working within your purpose 38:45 Omar shares his vision and dream for his writing 40:33 Where you can find Omar Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today we speak with Karen Nimmo, a registered clinical psychologist with a private practice in Wellington, working in adolescent and adult mental health. She also has a background in physical education. In a former life Karen was a print journalist and media consultant. Karen works primarily in performance and life coaching. As a clinical psychologist, she is able to assess, diagnose and treat psychological problems where required. She is trained in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy but draws on a range of models and tools to match individual needs.Time Stamps: 3:42 We start the conversation with a discussion of how to not just survive during this time but also thrive 5:07 Karen shares her tools for coping with distress and  building resistance 6:51 Karen explains the traffic light tool for managing what we can control and what we need to let go of7:53 Shelley shares how she uses the PIIP - Put It In Perspective - method 10:24 Karen shares her personal story of her husbands stage 4 cancer diagnosis and the plan that they came up with to help them navigate that time, which eventually turned into her current book 14:33 We talk about the importance of recognizing the mind-body connection 20:06 Karen talks about the challenging but therapeutic experience of writing her book, Fish Pie Is Worse Than Cancer24:45 Karen talks about despair, desperation and disgust as motivators for change 25:31 We dig deep into finding what’s stopping Shelley from going after her one big goal 27:35 Karen shares a powerful story about living your life based on a story that no longer holds true for you31:21 What is the story that you are living that you need some help to confront?  32:24 Karen talks about listening as an art form 35:15 Karen shares the reason behind her book ‘10 On The Couch Sessions to Diagnose, Explain and Treat Busy AF People Everywhere’ and her biggest takeaway from it Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

How Top Medium Writer Megan Holstein went from young entrepreneur to discovering the life of a writer. How she works through resistance, what she advises on figuring out how to get paid to live the life you love, and how less is more when it comes to goals. She's also a big proponent for minimalism both in terms of her "to do" list each day, as well as her material possessions. She also discusses her productivity experiments. She offers a step-by-step for how she tackles the writing process.Time Stamps:3:29 Megan shares the story behind the apps she developed at age 15  6:08 Megan shares the unique way she went from creating apps to being a published author 10:41 We discuss how to find clarity on what you want to do with your life 12:24 We discuss the idea of resistance as a psychological barrier, how resistance can give us clarity18:14 Megan shares her insight on how the most productive people actually do less and have fewer goals 20:46 Shelley shares the meaning behind The Big Self 21:46 Megan talks about how to cut out overwhelm by looking at the daily commitment and not the larger goal 28:16 We discuss Megan’s take on minimalism 32:17 We discuss our views on self-help and what the end game of self-help is 39:42 How to find Megan Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Whatever it is you’re doing to cope with the constant new normal of these uncertain times as we barrel into the holiday season, we hope it is healthy but even if it’s not, we’re glad you’re finding a way to apply some positivity to your life. To help you do just that, we have brought on author of three books and positive psychologist, Nico Rose, who holds a doctoral degree in business administration. He´s also a graduate of the MAPP program at University of Pennsylvania.Nico is a full professor of organizational psychology at International School of Management (ISM), Dortmund, one of Germany´s premier Business Schools. Prior to that, he served as the Vice President Employer Branding & Talent Acquisition at Bertelsmann, Europe´s largest media corporation. He is a frequent interview partner on human resources and leadership topics in newspapers, professional magazines, and online publications. Nico is also a regular keynote speaker at corporate events and conventions on leadership, coaching, and human resources. He lives in Hamm/Germany with his wife Ina, two children, and two cats.https://nicorose.de/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Corona_Emotions_Growth_Study_040320.pdfhttps://mappalicious.com/2020/03/27/10-well-founded-tips-and-tricks-to-cope-with-bad-moods-in-times-of-the-corona-crisis/Time Stamps: 2:39 Nico shares how he got started in the field of positive psychology 7:25 We dive into the misunderstandings of positive psychology 12:03 Nico explains post traumatic growth and the five points used to identify it 17:50 Nico shares the results of his survey during the corona crisis and the role gratitude plays in post traumatic growth 20:33 We dive deeper into the power of gratitude 22:59 Shelley shares about her dissertation on gratitude 25:52 Nico shares his top recommendations for specific behaviors we can adapt into our lives and routines right now34:22 The conversation switches gears to talk about organizational leadership and Nico explains his CAARMA Method and how it assesses people’s overall meaning and purpose at work45:35 Nico shares the scientific finding in positive psychology that has intrigued him the most 49:18 Where you can find Nico Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Whatever it is you’re doing to cope with the constant new normal of these uncertain times as we barrel into the holiday season, we are glad you are here! Joining us today is Tara Haelle. Tara is a regular Forbes contributor and the core topic leader in medical studies for the Association of Health Care Journalists. As a freelance science and health reporter and parenting blogger, her pieces frequently appear in NPR, Scientific American, Slate, Politico, HealthDay, Everyday Health, and Consumer Reports. Tara is author of The Informed Parent: A Science-Based Resource for Your Child’s First Four Years, coauthored with Emily Willingham. In another life, she was also a world traveler — backpacking, hiking, train-hopping and motorbiking through more than 40 countries on six continents while eating strange insects, climbing ancient ruins and swimming with sharks — before she became a mom. It was also pre-pandemic, and our interest in this interview is discussing what research is telling her about how we can cope in a crisis that just keeps going on and on.https://medium.com/@tarahaellehttps://www.tarahaelle.net/Time Stamps: 2:35 We open up the discussion talking about the pandemic and Tara shares her story about her personal emotional crash5:43  Tara discusses surge capacity and how the pandemic created a situation for us where we have exceeded that capacity 7:20 Shelley talks about chronic stress syndrome and the feelings of tired and wired8:25 We discuss why this time has been especially hard for high performers 11:00 Tara shares how accepting our current reality and accepting what that means are the keys to managing this pandemic 14:40 Tara explains the concept of ambiguous loss as it relates to the pandemic 17.40 We discuss parenting in the pandemic 24:16 We talk about screen time and how it relates to anxiety before and during the pandemic 30:12 Tara shares creative suggestions, practices and routines that she recommends to take care of ourselves through the pandemic and building up your resilience bank account Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Whatever it is you’re doing to cope with the constant new normal of these uncertain times as we barrel into the holiday season, we hope it is healthy but even if it’s not, we’re glad you’re finding a way to self-care. And self-care is one of many topics that our guest today is a master at. Nick Wignall is originally from Northern California, but he’s also lived in Dallas, Rome, Chicago, and now Albuquerque where he lives with his wife, and three daughters. He’s a licensed psychologist at The Cognitive Behavioral Institute of Albuquerque where he does psychotherapy with adults.Board-certified in behavioral and cognitive psychology (ABPP), he specializes in empirically-supported treatments for anxiety and insomnia, including interoceptive exposure therapy for panic attacks, exposure and response prevention (ERP) for phobias and OCD, and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I) for sleep difficulties. He is board certified by the American Board of Professional Psychology, a Diplomate of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy, as well as a member of the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies and the New Mexico Psychological Association.https://nickwignall.com/about/Time Stamps: 5:30 How and why the topic of mental health is still so misunderstood 8:01 Habits as the most important level of analysis when looking at mental health 9:14 We talk about the shame associated with mental health and the resistance to admitting that we are not okay14:00 Nick gives his thoughts on positive psychology16:45 We discuss men and their perspective on mental health 21:25 Nick talks about his Drill Sergeant Theory of Motivation 27:06 Best practices for managing our expectations of ourselves and others 32:43 How emotionally charged situations can clue you in to what expectations are causing friction in your life 33:42 Nick talks about mindfulness meditation and how it is currently the most under and overrated thing in popular culture right now 34:57 Nick shares details about his meditation practice 40:54 Why we should think of meditation as an exercise and not a coping strategy and how  finding your why when it comes to meditation is so important 47:13 Nick shares strategies to get started with a mindfulness meditation practice 52:05 Where to find Nick  Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

This release is officially our last release on how you can find greater meaning and purpose in your life by tapping into your inner self-confidence and getting BOLD.When we reached out to Mollie and told her about some of our upcoming themes for the Big Self Podcast she said: “I love the sound of Boldness, since I am all about having it all in life and love, and I would love to talk about how to boldly move through making space for both, without sacrificing the other.”Mollie Eliasof is a licensed Couples Psychotherapist helping high-powered professionals across the nation to have the same success in love, as they have in their career. Eliasof elevates relationships and marriages for government leaders, Fortune 500 c-suite executives, celebrities, media personalities and many others, so that they can stay focused on their life mission while maintaining their relationships at home -- truly having it all. Eliasof is a well-known Keynote Speaker, Online Course Creator, and host of the Next Level Relationship Podcast. Her expert advice has been featured in national publications including Forbes, Forbes Women, Thrive Global, and more. And check out her own podcast, Next Level Relationship.Time Stamps:2:37 Mollie describes having it all as a feeling of richness on the inside and not checking all the boxes of life3:24 We discuss how we feel more full in life when we are in alignment with our values and when we are doing the inner work4:51 Mollie shares how you can conquer fearlessness by focusing on being present 6:47 We discuss the importance of vulnerability in developing inner self-confidence 10:08 Mollie shares how to take steps towards vulnerability 13:35 Mollie shares her definition of wholeness and how she helps people obtain it 17:35 We discuss purpose as being present in the moment and how to balance being and doing in a way that feeds us rather than depletes us 19:28 Mollie shares how powerful fantasy and visualization can be to allow us to stretch ourselves and then work backwards to live in that boldness 23:07 Mollie shares her perspective on finding your purpose 25:16 We discuss confidence and boldness as it relates to gender roles 30:56 Mollie shares how to expand when you find yourself shrinking34:59 We discuss being bold in relationships and how to handle when your visions as a couple don’t align and there is an imbalance of courage 39:09 Mollie shares practical takeaways on how to handle it when you have that imbalance in your relationship 44:15 How to find Mollie44:59 How to join the Big Self School community and sign up for the free Gratitude Challenge 2020 at BigSelfSchool.com/gratitude. Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

On today’s show we are thrilled to bring to you a very special and timely message from our guest, Brian Pennie. After spending years in a cycle of addiction, dealing with his acute anxiety, one day he had a breakthrough. This led him to develop what he calls a ‘programme for life’ to deal with mental and emotional well-being.The program includes a vast range of tools and strategies that focus on self-awareness, decision-making, and mindset change strategies, as well as tactics to help people to boost their energy, find their life purpose, recognize negative thought patterns, and successfully navigate the relationships in their lives.Check out his memoir, Bonus Time, here, and learn more about his message and his program at: https://www.brianpennie.com/Time Stamps:1:53 Brian shares the story of his detox and the resulting seizure that led to his awakening moment 5:52 Brian tells the story of how his childhood trauma led to his addiction10:30 We discuss how we are the stories that we tell ourselves and how language is a vehicle for emotion 14:40 Brian shares about the practice of mindful self observation 18:45 We discuss the importance of a structured morning routine and Brian shares his acronym for his morning routine 24:52 We discuss how we can shift our mindset to look at obstacles as a way forward and the power of being anti-fragile and growing in the face of adversity27:34 Brian shares how the Great Britain rowing team in the 2000 Olympics inspired him to create a decision making framework that allows him to align with the right values at the right time to make the right decisions 31:10 We discuss the importance of knowing your values and Brian shares strategies to figure out what they are Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Today’s guest is Lisa Michaud, an International Success Coach, Speaker, Entrepreneur and Real Estate Investor. At the age of 32, she’s created a multimillion-dollar net worth, a growing real estate empire, incredible network and beautiful family. As a coach and speaker, Lisa inspires, leads and motivates everyone she works with. Her clients include entrepreneurs, executives, parents, and leaders who are committed to creating fun and meaningful lives.There are many takeaways from our conversation today, but what I really want you to tune into is what she says about goals, and habits, and some of the practices and principles she lives by.Time Stamps:1:51 Lisa shares how a health scare changed her life 7:48 We discuss the mindset shifts and habits that we need to create change and the importance of being honest with ourselves about our dreams and desires for life 10:49 The importance of recognizing the thoughts that are keeping you stuck12:08 Lisa talks about the power of getting started 14:35 We talk about the courage it requires to start something new and how fear is a natural part of the process 17:05 Chad shares his personal experience of this when he had the opportunity to do live Sirius XM radio 18:29 Lisa shares how we can reframe the fear 20:01 We discuss how goals are not about the outcome but who you become in the process25:50 Lisa shares about her 100 Day Goal Focus Framework35:03 We talk about the importance of asking yourself ‘is it serving you’37:25 Lisa shares the staples of her routine 41:32 Lisa explains how and why micro-journaling is such a powerful part of her routine Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Shauna Bowes is a graduate practicum student at Nia. She is currently pursuing her PhD in Clinical Psychology at Emory University. She most recently completed a clinical practicum working with treatment-resistant depression, and she has worked with diverse clients (including adolescents and adults from various ethnic and cultural backgrounds) in therapy and assessment.Shauna tells us why intellectual humility is critical for our self-understanding and how it extends to empathy and greater dialogue. More and more we live in echo chambers that are breeding grounds for confirmation bias. She tells us that “the tendency to favorably interpret information that supports one’s beliefs while denying, dismissing, and distorting information that does not. We know that confirmation bias can be harmful across settings and contribute to ideological extremism.” One of the antidotes to this is intellectual humility.She also tells us about her new blog on Psychology Today called, “Don’t Believe Everything You Think.”Time Stamps:4:08 Shauna shares how we become so fused with what we think that it's hard to understand or appreciate that we might be wrong5:53 What is intellectual humility 7:16 Shauna explains that there is some evidence that we can increase intellectual humility with certain primes or manipulations but that there is also evidence that it's pretty stable 9:07 We discuss cognitive empathy and affective empathy and their correlation to intellectual humility 10:20 Intellectual humility versus general humility and the emotional element of our thoughts and beliefs12:03 We discuss the role open-mindedness plays in intellectual humility 15:22 How being aware of our own limitations and humble about our beliefs allows us to be forgiving and tolerate of differences 17:50 We discuss how the goal of every conversation doesn't have to be to change the other person's mind 20:40 Shauna explains the power of metacognition and focusing on I statements 23:34 We discuss intellectual humility and the link to distress tolerance, how to recognize when your emotions are taking control and implementing a break system25:10 Shauna shares how you can change your story by going from 100% certainty to 99% certainty 29:39 Shauna shares her two guiding principles for growth Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

There are many ways we construct false narratives about ourselves. We tell ourselves the potential is within us, but we just never have the time. We tell ourselves forces outside us compel us to behave in ways that aren’t truly “who we are.” These truth distortions aren’t necessarily wrong. The question is how we lie to ourselves or distort our self’s reality, but why?The pursuit of self-knowledge is practical, even if a degree in Philosophy might not seem to be. The truth is, you will be happier and more effective in your life if you know yourself. To that end, we decided to reach out to a top Medium writer, blogger, and editor who recently graduated with a degree in philosophy, Jon Hawkins.Time Stamps:3:39 What exactly is philosophy?6:27 How thought experiments work and how they relate to practical philosophy.16:00 What does Hawkins do when confronted with a moral dilemma in real life? Someone in front of him checked out $50 worth of items at the self-checkout and then didn't pay. Should Hawkins tell on him?27:00 The importance of authenticity.30:29 How Heraclitus was right in the respect of flux and how we can't understand how others will respond and behave, but we can at least focus on ourselves when it comes to growth and developing self-knowledge.37:00 How we learn from self-confrontation.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

A lot of philosophy and psychology says that if you want someone else to change, you should first begin with yourself. There’s a great deal of wisdom and insight into us beginning with ourselves, but ultimately we don’t just know ourselves in a vacuum, we have to enter into community, into relationships.At the same time, there’s a lot of self-improvement ideologies that say we shouldn’t listen to others because it’s always about them. How can we discern the difference between when we should listen to ourselves and when we should listen to the feedback of others? Tara Blair Ball opens up about what went wrong in her first marriage, how challenging it was to be so vulnerable in writing about it in her memoir, The Beginning of the End.She discusses how to get out of a toxic relationship, and gives her best advice for personal growth and the development of self-knowledge. She also offers a course on how to break free from your own toxicity.Time Stamps:2:24 the interplay between instinct and instruction in relationships7:22 Tara shares her experience about finding herself in a toxic relationship, how she handled the situation and how she grew to take radical responsibility for her choices. 13:05 we identify a toxic person in a relationship but ignore the fact that healthy people do not date and stay with unhealthy people 13:38 unhealthy people and their behaviors are more likely to drag us down, then we are to bring them up. 17:40 the 4 step process -awareness, acceptance, action and application 22:02 it has to be a balance between recognizing our own self awareness and what we need while also taking into account what we get from others23:52 Solomon’s paradox 27:39 dealing with grief in the process 30:27 a big part of being able to change a story is to acknowledge that we have the power to write it to being with34:42 the practices that keep you connected to yourself Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Coming at you live with another learning curve Top 5 takeaway in 30 minutes or less.Finding your way to your desire requires a number of the principles we teach at the Big Self School. It requires a calm center and, paradoxically, the courage to put the ideas into practice. Whether you think you know your desires, but want to reconnect to them, or you simply have no idea, this book can help you realize your way to a deeper and more authentic connection with yourself and what you truly want.Desire leads you out. Paying attention to your longing — whatever name you give it — leads you to life. Desire is there even if you aren’t sure where it went or how in the world you will access it again. Desire may go dormant as you play all the ready-made roles that adulthood throws at you, but it’s there even in dormancy, steady as a heartbeat, ready to be resuscitated.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Chad and Shelley have a session on how to break through the obstacles that stand in the way to living a bigger life, a life you want. Maybe you don't even know what that life is, or maybe you want certain things for the wrong reasons. Lyndie Putnam helps us see from the inside out where we want to be and how to get there.Lyndie Putnam is a certified Life Coach and Seminar Leader who helps ambitious professionals and entrepreneurs strengthen their mindset to break free from personal limitations, reach their goals, and create a life they love. She does this by guiding her clients to go deep within for self-discovery and growth. Whether it is building a business, working on personal goals, or feeling more comfortable in one’s own skin, Lyndie’s mission is to empower her clients to grow and become the best version of themselves.Time Stamps:2:18 Common limiting beliefs that Lyndie Putnam sees with her clients.5:30 And so awareness is the key to anything it's the first step and so I always help my client first and foremost we we identify what they truly want and why they want it.9:44 The deeper why. The difference between an authentic calling and trying to prove yourself to someone.13:30 Lyndie shares her experience dealing with crippling fear as a salesperson in the oil and gas industry early on after graduating from college with a degree in psychology.15:00 For some people you maybe shouldn't quit your day job while building your dream.23:36 The importance of practicing gratitude day and night.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

After a letdown, the idea is to gather your strength especially in the places you feel broken and bounce back even higher than you fell. Failing and falling is a part of life. It’s a part of growth, if you use it right. A setback is a setback if you don’t. Setbacks can lead you to getting enveloped in fear and anxiety. They can keep you looping in mediocrity, jaded and scarred. At the same time, failure offers you an opportunity to grow and learn from your shortcomings. Failure is a mindset. You don’t really fail until you choose to end the story there. When you call yourself a failure, you begin to inhabit the identity of a failure. Every unsuccessful attempt isn’t a failure as long as you keep trying to learn. If you want to succeed, think of failure as your teacher—your personal trainer—raising the exercise bar so you can learn from your mistakes.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Chad and Shelley sit down for a session of self-knowledge with Anthony Moore. In a fascinating and quick-paced session we get down to the fundamentals: the five things extraordinary people know, and do. Anthony Moore has been a top Medium writer since 2017. His articles have been featured in Business Insider, Fast Company, Thought Catalog, CNBC, Yahoo!, and Thrive Global. Hundreds of thousands of readers view his articles every month. He is the author of What Extraordinary People Know: How to Cut the Busy B.S. and Live Your Kick-Ass Life. You can find out more about Moore at https://www.anthonymoore.co.Time Stamps:2:37 The impetus of the What Extraordinary People Know book. Looking at all careers and social classes and demographics of you know, actors, entrepreneurs, CEOs, artists, creators, and the extraordinary kind of like, section of that that group. It's like, what do they know? And what are their mindsets, their behaviors, their habits. And if you study these people, what makes them different, you actually start to see some pretty striking similarities and themes.3:40 The first thing that extraordinary people know and do really well.8:21 Anthony agrees with Shelley that you can know a lot of this way of trying to maximize your time like extraordinary people, but it can still be so hard to know how to turn it off at a certain time and keep your batteries charged.11:44 The second thing extraordinary people know and do.14:39 Easy money and hard money and the third thing extraordinary people know and do.24:12 The fourth thing extraordinary people know and do.28:36 The fifth thing extraordinary people know and do.33:21 The way identity plays a role in inhabiting your mindsets and beliefs.39:21 Getting clarity on what you value and what you want.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

At the Big Self School, we know you want to connect with the world in a way that’s meaningful and get rid of the feeling that life is just passing you by without you having anything to show for it. To do that, you need a community that supports you as you rediscover your purpose and resources to help you along the way. We want to celebrate a few big happenings in the Big Self School. What are five life-changing practices you can apply to your life to develop a deeper awareness and understanding of yourself? Tune in to find out.Time Stamps:2:00 Why is it so hard to develop self-knowledge?5:00 Psychology's contribution to self-knowledge over the past 200 years.7:00 The foundation of having higher emotional intelligence, being able to connect with people in a real way, being able to know yourself well enough to know where you're strong, where you're not strong. It makes for more durable relationships it makes for better parenting. Well, all these really practical outcomes that I, you know, I want people to know, there's that there's a point to all of this, this self knowledge.15:00 The technique of active reflective writing.20:30  Like there's a we have to take the punch and the criticism out of this kind of honesty that we need to give and ask ourselves some tough questions like what do I need to be taking responsibility for in my life, in order to get the life or move forward?24:45 Doing the shadow work.29:50 What's going on with Big Self School?Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." –Dalai LamaWe could all use a little more self-compassion right now, but why is self-compassion so hard? We talk about the power of the inner critic, where it comes from and how it functions. In the face of this critic, we need to cultivate self-compassion.&nbsp;Where does the inner critic and negative inner voice come from? You weren’t born with it. These voices are constructed. They tend to be an assembly of voices we’ve heard outside of us. All of the influences from our caretakers to our coaches to our friends to the media. And the voices reinforce our ego’s protective function — to ensure we’re not shamed or teased or corrected again. We want to be in the tribe. We want to do what pleases others.Experts are starting to agree that self-compassion is more powerful than self-esteem. Kristin Neff's research, alongside the research of other leading psychologists, indicates that people who feel compassionate toward themselves, their imperfections, and their failures ultimately experience greater well-being than those who are hypercritical.Letting go of dangerous and destructive self-criticism can finally lead to happiness and self-love.We talk about Kristin Neff's three stages of self-compassion. At any point in your day, you can pause and have a self-compassion break.Time Stamps:4:55 Speaking of changing your life, today, we're talking about the practice of compassion, self-compassion. And the Dalai Lama. Let's start with this quote, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” I like that because Because what I've been learning about self-compassion. Shelley, is that it's how you interact with yourself?6:10 Why do you think it's so hard for people? We're hard on ourselves. Now, why are we hard on ourselves? Especially in today's milieu, our cultural context, you start looking, you're just like, look at these amazing lives that every single person I'm looking at is living. And you start pointing the finger at yourself and you start thinking a little lesser of yourself.11:47 The power of the critic, the inner critic that can really trip us up because it sees a deficiency and it latches on to it.15:41 We have been talking about mindfulness from time to time on the podcast sometimes as an antidote to anxiety. By really looking it in the eye you disempower it. You confront it. And that's the same thing I think that we're talking about here. With a little self-compassion is to be aware of your emotions turn to them with curiosity.19:47 The second stage is common humanity. And I love this step because when we are in a negative downward spiral, Usually, you know, when the inner critic is, is doing its job, it's meant to diminish us to keep us safe is a lot of how it works. We think we're the only one.26:42 The first step is really about awareness that this is this hurts. This is uncomfortable. This is what I'm feeling. The second step with this common humanity is, you know, I'm not alone in this and we all struggle with this. And then the third one is truly being warm with yourself like, sometimes I'll even do this, like put my hand on my heart and like really talk to myself in terms of like kindness. May I be kind to myself.29:45 And it's not self pity. It doesn't mean you're weak. It's not being selfish by you know, having compassion for yourself but I think maybe the most important one for us to contrast it with is self esteem. Because I could very much see you know, someone saying, Oh, this is being kind to yourself is that jack handy thing from Saturday Night Live have you know, people like me and yeah, so I'm okay and you're okay.32:09 Write a self-compassion letter.Leave us a review and <a...

Remember the days when we were dreaming of the opportunity to work from home?&nbsp;The workplace can be full of distractions, empty time, needless meetings and interpersonal drama. At home you have flexibility, autonomy, and the comfort of working in your own space. Pre-pandemic, it was clear that in many cases you could simply get more done.&nbsp;But now that it is forced upon us, and the days and weeks blur into one another, the perception of our work and home life balance has shifted again. Throw in the fact that many of us are functioning in crisis, and that many of our kids are going to school online, or half-online and half in-person, and we’re faced with a whole new reality when it comes to working from home.On this week's episode, we discuss how each of the 9 Enneagram types flourish and struggle with remote work.Timestamps:3:00 We are discussing Enneagram types today and their work from home styles. Are you working from home? This topic will provide some insight into how to be your best work-at-home self.4:48 Type 1. The Reformer, the Improver, the Perfectionist. They have high standards for their work but can have a hard time being flexible, which is a challenge in the work-at-home environment.8:08 Type 2. They are the Helpers. Their pitfall is that they struggle with setting boundaries but the gifts they bring to the table include caring a lot about other's well being.12:17 Type 3. They are achievers and are driven to succeed. They tend to ignore their own needs, though, in pursuit of that success. We share some ideas for threes to be best working at home.16:54 Type 4. The Romantic, the Individualist. They are creative, artistic, and make beautiful things for us to enjoy. But they tend to become unproductive working on these creative projects.&nbsp;21:44 Type 5. The Thinkers. Type fives are extremely boundaried, so others tend to see them as aloof and withdrawn. The great thing is that Fives are really great at working from home.&nbsp;25:24 Type 6. The loyal skeptic. They are motivated by feeling safe. Their downfall is that they tend to look for problems. They are extremely loyal, and always prepared.30:03 Type 7. The Enthusiast. They are motivated to enjoy. Sevens are energetic, fun, and exciting. Working at home, they may tend to be easily distracted.&nbsp;33:09 Type 8. The Challenger or Protector. They are a body type, so are very in tune with their gut. One pitfall for Eights is that they can be seen as aggressors. On the flip side, one of their strengths is that they are clear and direct, and great with boundaries.37:39 Type 9. They are the Peacemakers. One of the pitfalls of Nines is that they fail to speak up in order to maintain peace, but one of their strengths is that they have a way of making others around them feel at peace.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

Back by popular demand: the Learning Curve where Shelley and Chad dish on what they’ve been learning during this pandemic while we’re all still trying to flatten the curve.Shelley dishes on what we’ve been learning about trust. She’s got this really cool equation for how you can know just how well you build and establish trust in all your relationships, and how well you receive it. We call it the trust equation.At the Big Self School, we know you want to connect with the world in a way that’s meaningful and get rid of the feeling that life is just passing you by without you having anything to show for it. To do that, you need a community that supports you as you rediscover your purpose and resources to help you along the way.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

“It is not the strongest or the most intelligent who will survive but those who can best manage change.” —Charles DarwinThe American Psychological Association (APA) defines adaptability as “the capacity to make appropriate responses to changed or changing situations; the ability to modify or adjust one's behavior in meeting different circumstances or different people.”On this week's episode we ask you six questions to help you discern and determine your own level of adaptability, and think about the soft spots where maybe you could do a little better. We're being forced to be adaptive under today's pandemic conditions. No one said this would be easy.Timestamps:1:56 After having to practice this very thing in a big way this week, we're talking about adaptability today on the podcast. We're defining adaptability according to the APA, and discussing whether it's a natural predisposition or a skill that can be learned.7:43 Okay, let's dive into some questions you can ask yourself to gauge your own adaptability. Our first question has to do with your resilience, your perseverance, grit, and focus.11:26 Are you open-minded? Do you have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset? We discuss our second question.14:04 Our third question: How willing are you to improvise? do your perfectionistic tendencies get in the way or your adaptability? Guess which one of us needs a little work in this area.17:55 Question number four has to do with our cognitive, emotional, dispositional flexibility. Which of the three would you say is most important? Shelley shares her thoughts on that question.23:55 Our fifth question discusses problem-solving. Are you someone who looks for problems, that just knows things will go wrong? Are you defeated as soon as the problem arises? Or do you get creative when problems arise?26:21 Our last question addresses that hard space where you're not really where you want to be but there is no solution. When things are just uncertain, are you okay with it?30:10 It really is all easier said than done. Shelley drops a big truth bomb about how all this works together in our lives.Leave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.

“Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give the care it requires, we do it not only for ourselves, but for the many others whose lives we touch.” —Parker PalmerThe term “self-care” has been used and abused, and seems to be generally misunderstood. It’s become a buzzword, directly related to the retail side of the wellness industry. The marketing leads us to believe self-care means regular spa days, wine in the bathtub, expensive vacations, retail therapy, and basically anything involving gratuitous “self(ish)” indulgence.&nbsp;Genuine self-care isn’t selfish. It’s healthy. It’s necessary for a thriving self and, therefore, life.Self-care helps us refuel and recharge so we can be there for others. If we are not showing up for ourselves, it becomes harder and harder to show up for the people in our lives. It is no less true for women as it is for men.We hash it out on this week’s podcast episode from the Big Self School. Shelley offers up some unconventional ideas and approaches to self-care, and Chad now feels free to go mountain biking every day. Maybe they’re still figuring a few things out too. Tune in to see what you think.Timestamps1:14 We're talking about self-care today and starting off the podcast by discussing some of the ideas and misconceptions around self-care and touch on how men approach self-care vs. how women approach it.7:11 Shelley shares her definition of self-care, and we talk about how our own self-care is not only about ourselves.10:00 Okay, let's get more specific about the kind of self-care practices we're talking about here. Avoid leap-frogging over the inner self-care with the band-aid approach12:57 One way to understand the right inner self-care practice for you is to look at the Enneagram. We talk about the different triads within the Enneagram and the kind of self-care that can be really helpful for each type.20:57 How self-care connects with our four pillars of awareness, connection, action, and wellness, and how you can hone in on those things with us at The Big Self SchoolLeave us a review and subscribe on Apple iTunes.Subscribe on Spotify.Find us at the Big Self Community on Facebook.