Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell

Holy smokes, this episode is jam packed with so much goodness and truth bombs. You're about to hear Tony and I get a bit vulnerable as we share some of our mistakes and lessons learned about growing more emotionally mature in our relationships. Ever accuse your spouse of being a narcissist – or at least being myopic or only seeing their side of things without taking you into account? Well, this episode is for you. Ever desire a stronger emotional connection with your spouse? This episode is for you too! Tony Overbay is a licensed marriage and family therapist from the Bay Area of California. He's the host of the popular podcast called The Virtual Couch. In his practice working with thousands of couples, he's noticed how crucial emotional maturity is, and how "narcissism" (which he explains is emotional immaturity) plays a role in the way we relate to ourselves and others. He goes on to explain how to wake up to it and steps we can take to be stronger within ourselves and our relationships. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Live Workshop on Feb 22: How to Have an Orgasm (and have better orgasms) Next Level Waiting List: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

Mutual pleasure is an important ingredient of a good sexual relationship. The pleasure we get from sex facilitates bonding, joy, and makes sex way more fun! Orgasms are probably one of the most pleasurable sensations we can experience. However, generally speaking, women have a harder time reaching orgasm than men do. There are many theories as to why this is the case. It can be distressing for a woman who wants to experience an orgasm in sex yet struggles to get there. Many people forget that reaching orgasm is a learned behavior. It's not as effortless as it seems like from movies or magazines. Although orgasm is a natural reflex to sexual stimulation, it's a skill to be learned – much like learning how to ride a bicycle. It's something that we learn how to do, and it might come easier for some people than others (no pun intended). I'm always inspired by accounts of men and women who work really hard to close the pleasure gap in marriage. They show investment in each other and commitment to building something wonderful both enjoy and want to be a part of. Today I got to interview a fantastic woman named Ashley who overcame many hurdles to experience more pleasure in her sexual relationship with her husband. After 5 years of heartache from trying all sorts of things, including spending a lot of money on high-end sex toys, she was ready to give up trying. She shares what shifts happened within her that finally helped her learn how to orgasm, and how amazing things have been since then. If learning how to orgasm has been a struggle for you or for someone you love, here's a good opportunity for you. On February 22nd I will be putting on a live coaching workshop about learning how to orgasm or how to have better orgasms. This is the workshop that Ashley refers to in this interview. Sign up today on our website. If you're interested in working with me to take your intimacy to the next level, I'll be opening the doors for registration again to my program called Next Level at the end of this month! Get on our waiting list to be the first to know when it opens. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

This episode is going to be a little more explicit than our usual episodes, but I think that's okay. We get to talk about squirting and female ejaculation, which has a lot of interest thanks to the internet. But it's also an amazing experience that couples can enjoy together, and attests to God's grand design in our bodies. And I love it because it adds more layers of mystery and fun to your sexual experience. Reinforcing the idea that you can know someone and be married to them such a long time, and yet discover new things about each other that are both very erotic and sexual and can be really bonding. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Next Level! waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

Communication and marriage is a big deal. And many couples tell me they wish their communication was better. Many men approach intimacy in marriage differently than women do, and each person in the marriage has their own fears and insecurities as well. And in fact, I think it's the way we deal with our insecurities or how we manage them, that often triggers the fears or insecurities or vulnerabilities in the other person. And what this does is it sets off this reactive cycle. We try to cover our insecurities. We say something that triggers our spouse and what they say triggers our vulnerability and round and round it goes, and often what's said isn't the same as the message that was received, which opens up the doors to more hurt feelings and misunderstandings. I met today's guest through one of my team members that has participated in her excellent mentorship program. Her name is Ramona Zabriskie. And she's spent the last decade of her life dedicated to helping women succeed in their marriages. She's a mentor to hundreds of wives, and she's full of all this folksy wisdom, like what you'll get to hear today, like "Five Lies We Tell Brides" and Teaching "Knights to Knit." In today's episode, you'll get to meet Ramona's five Crazy Ladies (and I'm wondering which one you relate to the most!), we talk about why husbands and wives don't listen to each other, and most importantly, you'll hear what Ramona believes are the steps to building not only just a good or great marriage, but a grand marriage as well. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: March Couples Retreat Tickets: https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/ Next Level! waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

I've observed from my own experience and coaching other couples that we often get in our own way of having the love and passion that we could experience in our own marriages. Sometimes we're just too focused on whether or not our spouse is reciprocating the love we think we're offering. In other words, we reduce love and marriage to be transactional. I love this interview that I have with Dr. Corey Allan because he talks about really powerful questions to ask oneself: "Would I want to be married to me? and "How am I being towards my spouse right now?" I think those two questions can guide us through a lot of the transitions and difficulties and also guide us to creating a more passionate and intimately connected marriage. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: March Couples Retreat Tickets: https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/ Next Level! waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

The older I get and more experience I gain, the more I've come to appreciate my eroticism as a part of me. I haven't always been this way though. In all of its good intentions, sometimes people internalize the heart of the purity message by being void of sexual feelings or urges, as if it's a virtue to not have any sexual thoughts or feelings. The reality is that just as we are spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical beings, we're also sexual beings. We can grow sexually as we grow spiritually. And my sexpert guest on the podcast today describes exactly that process of growing erotically (or sexually) as we grow spiritually. Her name is Brandi Harris. She's a licensed marriage therapist that is also a Christian and helps individuals and couples grow sexually. She's also a mother of three and has created a program for parents on how to talk to their kids about sex too. And as a bonus for our listeners and followers, she's offering 10% off with the code GETYOUR23. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: March Couples Retreat Tickets: https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/ Next Level! waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Men's coaching program waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/mens-coaching/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

Are you a "nice guy" or married to a "nice guy?" "Nice" isn't to be confused with genuinely kind and caring. By nice, I mean one that hints around at what he wants from his wife, but doesn't really ask for it in case she doesn't want to either, or that it might upset her or that he might be disappointed later. So a "nice guy" is just never really direct about what he wants, doesn't really own it, and his emotional center seems to be revolve around his wife rather than taking ownership for his own feelings. This is also the type of person that goes the extra mile for his wife, but has ulterior motives in it, and when he doesn't get what he wants or when it doesn't kind of pan out the way he wants, even though he never clearly expressed what he wanted from the beginning, he feels cheated. My guest today is Brian Wagstaff. Brian is a member of my next level coaching program and a graduate of my men's coaching program. Brian is a successful entrepreneur and has a wonderful family and a recovering "nice guy." Today he shares his journey of recognizing his nice guy tendencies, the struggles he faced in his marriage, what changes he had to make, and how he made them, and how his marriage and intimacy is tremendously better today than it was before. Other Resources: Men's coaching waiting list Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon

Are you ready to take action, to take charge of your relationships, and make this year different and better than any other year you've ever had? I'm going to show you how coaching can get you out of your ruts and habits and find more clarity and growth in your life and marriage. And I'll show you how our exciting new program can help take your marriage to the next level! Next Level Register here between January 1-8 Attend the webinar on January 4 for more information Coming up in 2023: Feb 1-14: Sextimacy challenge - Increase your intimacy and win cool prizes. Watch your email and social media for more info. March 23-26: Intimately Us Couples retreat in St. George - Romantic yet intensive 3-day, 3-night event designed for couples to draw closer together intimately, have fun adventures, win door prizes and receive top-notch coaching. June 9 (6-9): Virtual Lovemaking Retreat - Watch your emails as the date gets closer for more info.

There are four fundamental questions we seek in our intimate relationships: Am I safe? Am I loved? Am I enough? And do I matter? How we go about answering these questions is the basis for how we learn to love and be loved in our marriages. Loving another person well is a practice. It's something you keep at trying over and over, and learning to get better at it. The more conscious we are\ about the way we're loving and seeking love, and implementing good practices, the better we can become at healing and thriving in our relationships. Today's guest is Lair Torrent, a licensed therapist that specializes in couples work. He's the author of a fantastic book called The Practice of Love: Break Old Patterns, Rebuild Trust, and Create a Connection That Lasts that I've read and recommend. Other Resources: Next Level! waiting list Men's coaching waiting list Intimately Us Couples Retreat Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

With practice patience, determination, and mindfulness men can prolong the pleasure they feel by resisting ejaculation and prolonging their pleasure and orgasm period. So today I wanted to show you that orgasm and ejaculation are actually two separate physiological processes in the body. And how it's the ejaculation that is responsible for the start of their refractory period. And I want to offer you some tips on how to enjoy multiple orgasms without ejaculating. Here are the links to the events and programs mentioned in the episode: 6 Weeks to Multiple Male Orgasms course Next Level waiting list Intimately Us Couples Retreat Other Resources: Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

There's a lot of anxiety in our culture around sexuality in general. And within the topic of understanding one's sexuality, there's even more cultural anxiety around masturbation. I've personally had lots of questions around masturbation, and I'm glad to report that I'm not alone – I get many DMs on our Instagram and emails asking sincere questions about this sexual behavior. I asked Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, one of my favorite marriage and sex experts, to share her insights on the topic. I learned so much from her! Instead of, "Is this particular sexual behavior ok?" there's a better question to ask instead – which you'll get to hear in this episode. I also learned the value of self-definition for expanding one's sexual agency, in other words, gaining your own testimony so-to-speak and committing to living your life with honesty and integrity to your highest and best values. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Next Level waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us March Couples Retreat Tickets: Intimately Us Couples Retreat

There's no doubt in my mind that there's a deeply spiritual and emotional aspect to really good sex. When two lovers come together as good friends that want to give and receive pleasure and connect to know each other at a very deep and intimate level, sex takes on deep meaning. Many in American or western culture put a big focus on orgasm and finishing, for good reason: orgasm feels good. Really, really good. However, once in a while, we're too busy driving to our destination that we fail to see the beauty along the way. Slowing things down, way down, on purpose can bring you a new view of sex and deep intimate connection you may have not noticed before. Today's guest is Tammy Hill. She's a licensed family and marriage therapist as well as a professor at Brigham Young University in the family sciences department. She and her husband, Jeff, have 12 children and I lost count of how many grandchildren. She's studied and taught a slower, more thoughtful approach to sex which is full of awareness and soulful connection, called Tantric sex or Slow Sex, for more than a decade. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Next Level waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us March Couples Retreat Tickets: Intimately Us Couples Retreat

Like many other men, I've probably said to my wife maybe once or twice, "I'm always in the mood for sex!" or "Whenever you want it, I'm ready!" Just kidding, I've probably said something like that hundreds of times. But I know there are exceptions to "always" being in the mood. In fact, when I'm really honest, there are many times I'm not in the mood. And my wife is even more puzzled when she's in the mood and I'm not. We're socialized to think that men should have the higher sexual desire in long term marriages, but "the stereotypical masculine approach to sexual desire is working against heterosexual couples' intimate relationships, and it's getting in the way of good sex." Today's guest is Dr. Sarah Hunter Murray, a sex researcher and therapist who has studied male sexual desire. I've read her book, "Not Always In The Mood," and I look forward to sharing this interview with you. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Next Level waiting list: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us March Couples Retreat Tickets: Intimately Us Couples Retreat

We've done several episodes about painful sex in the past, but none of them have been as personal as this one today. You get to meet my friends Bryce and Shannon, who tell their story of how painful sex has really interfered with their relationship early on in their marriage. And I love the story because it's a story of faith. I also really appreciate Shannon and Bryce being really vulnerable and open and sharing specifically the things that help them and also didn't help them along their journey. I love these interviews where we're not interviewing experts per se, but these are just ordinary couples that are really doing extraordinary things in their relationship, and I'm so grateful that they're willing to share their story with you. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

This episode is for any couple that has struggled with feelings of shame about bodies or sexuality, and has experienced conflict in their marriage around sexual differences. I am so very grateful that Jan Marie and Andrew were willing to come on the podcast to share their story. They were nervous and are private people, so it's a big deal for them to be open and vulnerable, in hopes that it inspires and blesses a listener's marriage. I met Jan Marie and Andrew at the marriage retreat we did last October. In fact, they celebrated their 22nd wedding anniversary at the event! They've been through a lot of turmoil around sex and intimacy in their marriage together, which you'll get to hear. You'll also get to hear the tipping point when they've found healing and hope in their marriage. I also want to make a plug for marriage retreats. There's something special that happens when both of you attend a retreat to refresh and recharge. It's a time to get on the same page and really connect in new ways. You get to meet other couples too and learn from great marriage coaches. Our next marriage retreat is coming up on March 23-26, and you'll want to get on the waiting list to be the first to hear about the details. You can join the waiting list here. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples: Intimately Us

Announcement: Join the waiting list for the couples retreat in March! For the next few episodes, I want to take a break from interviewing experts per se and showcase real stories from "ordinary" couples who have built extraordinary intimacy in their own marriages. One of the purposes of this podcast is to help as many people realize how wonderful sex is, and although it's sacred between a husband and wife, there's so much joy, excitement, expansion of self, growth, light, and connection through sex. It doesn't have to be such a taboo subject! I'm excited for you to meet the first couple in this series! You'll get to meet LeAnn and Jeff Austin from Georgia. They share their story about how they grew from a functional sex life to an intimate and adventurous sex life later in their marriage. They have four sons. Their two older children are married now. Jeff works as an airline pilot and LeAnn recently started a life coach business helping people learn to love themselves and how to build a great relationships with their daughters-in-law. For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and sexy app for married couples (mentioned in the podcast today): Intimately Us

If someone were to ask you what's your definition of intimacy, how would you answer that question? And how would you explain to another person how to develop more intimacy in your marriage? Also, how important are communication skills in an intimate relationship? What things interfere with our ability to communicate effectively with our spouses? That's what Dr. Dave Schramm and I talk about today. Dave and I go way back. He was one of the keynote speakers of my second Get Your Marriage On! Live event back in 2019. He's a professor of Family Life in the Human Development and Family Studies department at Utah State University. He has his PhD from Auburn University. You can find out more about Dr. Dave's work at drdaveschramm.com. Here is the YouTube video we reference in the podcast: "It's Not About The Nail"

There's a difference between a functional marriage and an intimate marriage. Some marriage advice people may have received is to compromise to keep the peace between a couple. This advice is great to keep the marriage functioning, but compromising on everything often interferes with creating an intimate marriage. Today's guest is Alexandra Stockwell. She's got a fascinating story about why she became an Intimacy Coach.

This is one of our spicier podcasts! Keelie and Austin Reason from the Love Hope Adventure Blog and Podcast decided to join me today to talk about male pleasure and the importance of emotional connection as a foundation for happy and intimate marriage.

This is part two of a two-part podcast. Last week, we talked about stage three sex. We introduced this framework of what stages one, two, and three are, and this is a follow-up to that. Enjoy!

Normal people have marriage problems. In this episode, I'll introduce to you my three-stage framework to take your marriage and sex life to the NEXT LEVEL! This is something I'm passionate about. I hope you learn something new!

In every marriage, there's a person with a higher desire for sex and a person with a lower desire for sex. What are unhealthy and healthy ways of responding to your spouse's desire level? How can you work together as an intimate team to create a marriage that truly has room for both people, to transition from a "me vs you" to a more intimate "us"? These are the questions I had on my mind when I met Amy Langford, a certified life coach, mother of 4, and fellow marriage & sex nerd. You're about to hear her story about how she learned to handle herself better in the midst of her husband's pursuit of sexual connection, navigate unwanted pornography use in the marriage, and a way to create space for more sexual desire within yourself, even if you're the one with less desire for sex.

100 podcast episodes for Get Your Marriage On! Wow! What a ride the past couple years have been. I've had the privilege of interviewing many sex experts. In many of the episodes, I ask them what black belt sex tips they'd give to a couple in a healthy marriage to help them up the quality of connection and pleasure in the bedroom. I've rounded up my favorites from the past 50 episodes (see episode 50 for Black Belt Sex Tips 1.0). This is an episode you're not going to want to miss! Ready? Let's go!

Our bodies are absolutely incredible and attest to the marvelous power and intelligence of our great Creator. Our heart beats nearly 100,000 times a day. Our eyes have self-focusing lenses and work in tandem to help us see images in three dimensions. Through our bodies, we can hold loved ones, offer a loving touch, and even participate in creating new life. Our bodies are the temple of our spirit and the instruments of our hearts and mind. Despite the miracle of a body, many people struggle with liking their body or struggle with a body that doesn't function the way they want it to, or just plain 'ol struggling to be confident in their own skin and size. Sometimes this goes on to loathing ourselves in unhealthy ways, affecting our intimate relationships. Vanessa Oly is my guest today to talk about her journey of learning to love her own body as it is. Her own transformation inspired her to study nutrition, hormones, and fertility. She teaches other women how to embrace who they are and to understand how their body works.

Many of you are in a similar phase of life as we are: raising young children and teenagers, and possibly thinking about having another baby. Conception is an incredible miracle because there are so many moving parts to making it work (no pun intended). I had the privilege of meeting with a world-famous fertility doctor, Dr. Allison Rodgers a OB/GYN and Reproductive Endocrinologist. and I'm so happy you get to listen to part of what I learned.

Think about the qualities that make you successful in your career: working hard, being the first to show up and the last to leave, and being an achiever. Sometimes very capable and successful people have a hard time in their intimate relationships. What if the same qualities that translate to success in one's career or workplace actually work against you in your intimate relationship? Rhonda Farr is a certified Life Coach and works with high achievers on their intimate relationships. I got a lot out of this interview and there was a lot I could relate to. I suppose there are many parts that you'll relate to as well.

In this episode, Dan shares lessons learned about what it means to love someone well. He discusses reflections about courage and creating an intimate marriage where there's room for two people to thrive. He shares other thoughts from his mother, who passed away from cancer a few weeks ago.

I used to think that a woman's period was just nature's way of telling you that you're not pregnant. But there's so much more to understanding one's cycle. Did you know that a woman's cycle can be broken down into four phases, and each phase has their own superpower? That understanding your hormones and what they're there for can give you more confidence and energy? And what foods should you eat (and what to avoid) to help support a healthy body and hormone levels? Ashlee has personal experience with PMS, debilitating period pain, and infertility is what ultimately set her on a journey to learn more about how food and lifestyle affect hormone health, and eventually creating her signature course, Cycle Strategy 101, as well as Exercise and Hormones, and Cycle Sexcess. As you'll see, Ashlee is passionate about teaching women how to tap into their superpowers by honoring their cyclical rhythms. Links mentioned in this podcast episode: Wild Power In the Flo Julva

Do you ever wish your husband would take more initiative in the bedroom? Our podcast this week is all about masculine leadership within the bedroom (please note: this is not to diminish or replace feminine leadership). GS Youngblood is an author and coach for men. GS teaches how important being grounded, taking the lead, and responding rather than reacting is within your marriage. I hope you learn something from GS, as I know I did! #getyourmarriageon #marriagepodcast #relationshippodcast #sexcoachpodcast #christiansexpodcast

I've learned that intimacy problems can creep into the marriage because of unrealistic expectations and patterns of avoiding the issue. Whether it's performance anxiety, body image issues, or even a sexless marriage, you can break out of your patterns that keep you stuck by getting a clearer understanding of your dynamic. I'm honored to have Braxton Dutson on the podcast today to talk about what to do when you find yourself in a marriage where sex is not as satisfying. Braxton Dutson is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and certified sex therapist (CST) through AASECT. He hosts the sexual health podcast called Birds and Bees Podcast which provides education for couples and parents about sexual health topics to improve their relationships with each other and have sexual health conversations with their children. If that wasn't enough, Braxton is an adjunct professor of human sexuality at the University of Utah college of social work.

Experiencing pain with sex is, unfortunately, all too common for many women. According to one peer-reviewed study I read out of Australia, 20% of women regularly experience pain with sex. Other research suggests that just about every woman at one point in their life will experience pain with sex. But sex shouldn't be painful. There are tons of resources and therapies out there to make sex better for everyone. Today I have as my guest Dr. Rose Schlaff. She's a pelvic floor physical therapist and sex nerd that specializes in helping women enjoy sex and heal from painful sex. In this episode, we do a deep dive into what causes pain with sex, the different types of pain, and what you can do to heal from it to make sex great for you and your spouse. For more information about Dr. Schlaff visit the following: Website: https://www.bewellwithrose.com/ Instagram: @bewellwithrose Free Guide Mentioned in Episode: www.bewellwithrose.com/guide

Let's get one thing out of the way first — dirty talk isn't dirty. It's actually an intimate form of communication to let your spouse into your heart and mind. It's a way to express the erotic part of you with your lover. It's about using your words to arouse. The nice thing about married sex is that it's a place you can go where things don't have to be so cleaned up. You can be less formal with each other and use language with each other you wouldn't use in another context – creating more arousal, intimacy and excitement. If "talking dirty" (and I put that in air quotes) is something you've always found awkward or have no idea where to start, you're in for a treat! This episode with Melanie Studley will hopefully help you and your lover discover a new way to draw closer together and have some sexy fun! For more information, check out our tasteful, comprehensive, step-by-step guide to increase connection with your spouse through erotic conversations, or "dirty talk." This 40-page guide has something for both brand new, hesitant sexy talkers and those who may be a little more experienced. Use the included worksheets and game suggestions to explore new vocabulary and increase the connection, passion, and fun in your marriage!

Abuse of any kind, whether it's physical, emotional, or sexual, is evil and wrong. Sexual abuse is particularly harmful because our sexuality is so personal to us. There is often some shame around our sexuality anyway, and the abuser takes advantage of it to make us feel less worthy. But healing is possible! If abuse is part of your story, I hope today's episode gives you hope. Today's guest is Nicole Graf. She's a champion for sexy & intimate marriages as well as a Christ follower. She's a certified Stress Management Consultant, has a degree in psychology and helps others overcome sexual abuse and find healing & hope. Something that stood out to me a lot in this interview with Nicole is just the power of forgiveness and gratitude. Like those two themes just came up over and over and over for me and how important it is to get outside help and to have a really good, solid education on what really is supposed to be and not supposed to be. And the value of good role models. There's so much goodness, in this episode, I hope you listened to the very end and learn a lot from it just as I did. @nakedheartcoach

I am so excited to talk about today's topic! The idea for this podcast episode was partially inspired by an upcoming podcast episode I'll be releasing in a few weeks. I interviewed an author, GS Youngblood. His tip was about how foreplay begins the moment your past sexual encounter ends, and that foreplay should be done throughout the day not immediately before sexual intercourse. I've thought a lot about foreplay and I have been more intentional about making foreplay great in my marriage. Today I want to share a few ideas that I've learned from my own experience and from others that I admire about meaningful foreplay in sex. Now, let's talk about what foreplay is, how to do it right, why some couples may struggle with foreplay, and end with some specific, actionable things you can do right away to make better foreplay an amazing and rewarding part of your marriage.

There are so many parallels between money and intimacy when it comes to marriage. For many people, money represents security. When money issues creep up, it can threaten our ability to trust our spouse. Issues revolving around spending habits in a marriage can add a lot of stress to the relationship. We also bring to a marriage two different world views on money, creating an opportunity for growth – requiring both people to lean in to each other and get more honest with each other throughout the process. Today I interview Juli and Thomas from Marriage Puzzle. They are marriage coaches who help others overcome pain points around money, intimacy, and communication so that they can go from feeling overwhelmed to feeling secure in their marriage.

You're about to meet my guests on today's episode, Zach and Darcy Spafford. Zach used to struggle with habitual pornography use and Darcy struggled with trying to figure out what to do with her feelings of hurt and mistrust. After applying certain tools and committing to serious growth together, they've not only overcome but are now thriving together in their relationship, as you'll see! They now host a podcast titled: The Self Mastery Podcast: Overcome Pornography Whether or not porn use is part of your story in your marriage, I hope you learn as much as I did from Zach and Darcy's courage and the action they took! You might also be interested in my Life After Pornography App!

Initiating sex can be a very powerful way to communicate love and desire to your spouse. Initiating is a powerful bid for connection. It's a way of saying, "I want to connect with you." Initiating can be very intimate. And it's very validating to be wanted sexually. To prepare for this episode, I ran an informal survey of our Instagram followers to get a better idea of what other couples struggle with when it comes to initiating. The answers were enlightening and I saw several patterns in the responses. I hope you find this episode just as insightful! Enjoy.

I'm interested in doing a podcast episode primarily for men about understanding intimacy, especially if it wasn't modeled in your home growing up. To be clear, I don't mean "intimacy" as a euphemism for sex. I mean Intimacy as in relational closeness: a willingness to know and be fully known by your spouse. Many men struggle to get emotionally close to their spouse. They confuse intimacy with sex. They think showing emotion is a sign of weakness (with the exception of anger). I don't know how accurate this is, but I once heard this cliver quip about how men want to penetrate their wives sexually and women want to penetrate their husbands emotionally. Yet so many men have never learned how to let another person into their heart. Today I interview Dr. Randell Turner, who's done a lot of research and ministry around teaching men intimacy skills. He's got an interesting story that you might relate to as well!

In every marriage, there is a spouse with higher desire for sex and a spouse with lower desire for sex. In this episode, I'll talk about the benefits of being higher or being lower desire. As the high desire spouse in my marriage, I know what it's like to feel anxious or "needy", and it's not attractive. I'll share some thoughts on what we can do about our anxieties to improve intimacy and connection in our marriages coming from a place of strength rather than weakness.

For this week's episode, we continue a Q&A session with Jenny Rose about sex and intimacy. Jenny is a family lifestyle influencer. She asked some questions from her audience that I tackle in last week's and this week's episode, such as: How do you balance time with yourself and with your spouse when you feel touched out at the end of the day How to transition from Mommy mode to Wife mode What to do with mismatched sex drives Toys, frequency, pregnancy, And many more wonderful questions Let's jump back in where we left off last week.

This episode is unique! Jenny Rose, a family influencer known as @princessturnedmom reached out to me and asked if she could do a podcast takeover and ask me some questions from her audience. How fun! Jenny likes to say she has Jesus in her heart and Disney in her veins. She was SO fun to have on the podcast. Check out PART ONE of two where we discuss your questions about sex and intimacy.

Today's podcast is for the husbands out there that want to make sex great. There's far more to just the mechanics and geometry of sex to being a good lover. There's romance, creating exciting erotic contexts, sharing mental loads, and much more that go into making love with not just your body but your heart too. This might just be my experience as a man, but we men don't get as much helpful education on how to be a good lover. So I'm excited to have Keith Gregoire along with his wife Sheila, author of The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex. I've read this book and it's excellent. Keith and Sheila have been writing about sex in marriage for 10 years, and is respected for her approachable easy-to-relate to, and humorous style towards improving sex in marriage. Be sure to listen to the very end because I'm giving away copies of their books, The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex and revamped The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex. Those details are after our interview.

It's normal to seek validation from our spouse in marriage. By validation I mean to get a sense of our legitimacy as a person and a spouse, such as being told we're sexy enough, pretty enough, and desirable. And it's normal to seek that validation. But what do you do when you don't feel it? What do you do when you feel like your spouse isn't interested in you romantically or sexually? What about those times you don't feel cherished or respected? If you're hoping to feel inspired today, you've come to the right place. Jessica shares how she grew more solid within herself in her circumstances and as a result has found great strength, even in her darkest moments. I think there's something wonderful in her message for everyone to hear! Jessica is a devoted Christian, is married to her sweetheart for over 17 years, and has four children.

Like most kids, I loved taking on new roles when I'd play with my friends and siblings… whether it was cops and robbers, or ninjas, or race car drivers, there's a creative & playful element to trying on new roles and identities. As an adult in a romantic and committed relationship, you can bring that same creativity and playfulness into the bedroom through role play! Many couples role play instinctively to one degree or another as a way to add healthy newness and creative fun to bedroom play. My wife and I have always been interested in what role play sex is and fortunately, we met Jon and Katie Runyan, who are experts at role play sex and the founders of Faithful Fling. Whether you're new to the concept of role-playing or have a lot of experience getting into character in your encounters, I'm sure you'll love this episode!

When it comes to sexual desire, there's a lot we can learn from our stomachs. Hey, we've eaten food our whole lives! In this podcast, I will discuss 5 lessons I've learned about sexual desire from food. I want to encourage you to honestly discuss the differences you have in your sexual "appetites" or desires and learn how to be a good partner to your spouse. #getyourmarriageon #sexeducationpodcast #malesexeducation #christianmarriage #christiansexeducation

Some couples really struggle with intimacy. And I'm not referring to "intimacy" as a euphemism for sex. I mean their relationship feels superficial and they've run out of "safe" topics they can discuss because all the harder topics make one or both of them anxious and uncomfortable. As a result, the marriage starts to feel a bit empty and unexciting, boring, and routine. What do you do in situations like this? This is exactly the question I had for Adam and Karissa King. They are a husband-wife duo of therapists & coaches from Elk Grove, California. They have fantastic advice on how to better your communication skills and develop empathy for one another.

I had the privilege of being a guest on Manda Carpentner's podcast called A Longer Table, and wanted to share that interview here because I think the things we discussed are super valuable for you to hear. In this interview, we talk about a number of topics such as: Purity Culture What to do when you feel the need to manage an other's sexuality How important is sex, really? What is your definition of sex, and does it have to involve intercourse? If you're struggling sexually, what advice would give? Is scheduling sex a good idea? Is it bad to use toys? What about dirty talk? Perspectives on how pornography affects marriage Manda Carpenter is a wife, mother, foster mom, and Christian. I love her podcast, A Longer Table, because she intentionally includes conversations with people that have very different backgrounds, just to get their perspective and to broaden her understanding with people that think differently than she does. I think we could all use a healthy dose of open and honest communication once in a while! And this topic was all about sex, a topic I'm particularly passionate about :)

For many individuals, myself included, intercourse can feel very pleasurable. Couples can find deep meaning through intercourse as well: feeling intimate, personal, sweet, and bonding. However, intercourse isn't always fireworks for both people. And how can you make intercourse better for both people? That's what we want to talk about in today's episode! I learned a lot from this episode and I hope you do too! Ruth Buezis is a gifted educator that has taught thousands of people how to improve their sex lives from a Christian perspective. She was a guest on this podcast last year (see episode #17) and I've invited her back to teach us more about how to make intercourse amazing!

Feeling shame about our natural sexual urges is more harmful than we think. Clinton and Charity Munoz decided to share their story in hopes of helping others. A few years into their marriage Clinton's secretive and compulsive use of pornography was distressing to Charity and took their marriage to dark depths. With the help of God and good resources, they've been able to restore their marriage to more than it was before and find new meaning. I hope you enjoy this podcast episode as much as I did!

Al Carraway is probably the most optimistic and positive person I've ever met. Just being with her for an hour was life-changing. "Life is too short to stay unsatisfied." and "Stubbornly refuse to have a bad sex life." are two quotes that have rung in my head ever since our conversation. Al is from New York, and became a Christian in her early 20s. She's a mother, wife, award-winning motivational speaker, and author of three books, including one about marriage. She's inspired millions of people through her message. I hope you enjoy this podcast episode!