Connected Families Podcast

Being a single mom is exhausting. And when we hear from single moms, they often say things like, “I feel SO alone.” “I don’t know if I can make it.” “Are my kids and I beyond hope?” Maybe you wrestle with thoughts and beliefs like these too. Do you wonder if God is listening, and working in your difficult situation? Listen in on today’s episode focused on single parenting. We believe the wisdom shared will infuse you with solid truth and precious grace to keep you walking the road of motherhood on a firm foundation.  Above all, know that God deeply loves you and your children, and He is ever-present in all of your circumstances. Even if you are in a two parent home, you’ll gain LOTS of wisdom and insight from the two courageous, faith-filled single moms that we interviewed for these podcasts.  You are not alone. In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) walk you through straight-forward conversations about single motherhood. You’ll hear from several single moms, as well as a leader at a local church who ministers to single moms. These moms describe in their own words the ups and downs of single parenthood, and how the Connected Families framework has helped them on their journey. As you lean into God, you’ll be equipped to take care of your own heart and strengthen yourself.  With this as your foundation you can be a strong pillar for your children no matter what the circumstances are around you. You and your children are not broken, and you are not alone! In this podcast:  In this podcast, we hear from single moms about their parenting journey. These moms give honest and vulnerable responses to the following questions:   What key beliefs keep you steady through the ups and downs?How do you draw on a supportive community?What are the ways that you saw God show up to help you through difficult times?How do you deal with negative things an ex-spouse may have said about you to your kids?How do you navigate different parenting styles? If you are a single mom who is looking for parenting guidance, we are here for you! You can check out our resources, or contact us at https://connectedfamilies.org/contact-us/. We recognize that as a single parent, finances may be a hindrance to taking our online courses. Which is why we always offer scholarships. Never hesitate to ask.               .  Bible verses mentioned in this podcast: Zephaniah 3:17Isaiah 61:1-3Proverbs 3:5-6 Resources mentioned in this podcast: Connected Families-Grace and Truth for Moms (Online Course)Beyond New Beginnings (Chaska, MN)Together for Good (St. Paul, MN)Safe Families for Children (nationwide) Other resources for single moms in the Twin Cities area: Emerge-Twin Cities Do you feel stuck in negative patterns? Are you isolated? Are you anxious about your kids’ successes or failures? Our Grace and Truth for Moms online course will help you identify and hold on to God’s truth about YOU, and equip you to stop believing toxic lies about yourself. This course is created for small groups, so grab a few other moms and be encouraged!

Does the stress and struggle of parenting leave you feeling unworthy or incapable of being the mom you long to be? Do these statements sound familiar? “I’m a failure as a mom and I have ruined my kids!” “I’m an angry parent with an angry child!” Perhaps it feels like you are parenting from a place of discouragement and anxiety. We want you to know that God’s grace runs deep for you, and you are not alone. You can find grace and truth for yourself as a mom. In today’s episode, you will learn how to work through the feelings of doubt and discouragement that many moms experience. In this rebroadcast from 2020, Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) joins Heather MacFadyen on her podcast, Don’t Mom Alone. Heather interviews Lynne about the importance of recognizing toxic lies you may believe (about yourself and your kids) and how to replace those lies with God’s grace and truth.  You’ll learn to process your difficult feelings and beliefs in a way that helps you to be a vessel of grace and truth for yourself–and for your kids.  Discover in today’s podcast: how extreme thinking, perfectionism, and catastrophizing can keep you stuck in a negative parenting cycle practical ways to work through negative emotions and experience God’s healing and peace  the importance of having support from other moms who can listen and encourage you encouragement that can help you persevere in living out God’s grace and truth for you and your kids About Heather MacFadyen: Married and a mom to four sons, Heather struggled with the challenges of raising four young boys. She isolated herself from community, fearing embarrassment, rejection, and failure. Slowly she began to reach out to friends again. Through prayer with friends, God healed wrong identities Heather held onto. She started a podcast called “God-Centered Mom” (now Don’t Mom Alone), a show that has been downloaded over 7 million times.  Bible verses mentioned in this podcast: Matthew 12:34 Ephesians 4:15 Ephesians 6:4 Psalm 139:14 2 Corinthians 10:5 Resources from this podcast to encourage you:   You Are a Daughter of the King speech (design courtesy of Don’t Mom Alone) Trash, Truth, Treasure: Helping Kids Turn Anger into Wisdom Grace and Truth for Moms Online Course Do you feel stuck in negative patterns? Are you isolated? Are you anxious about your kids’ successes or failures? Our Grace and Truth for Moms online course will help you identify and hold on to God’s truth about YOU, and equip you to stop believing toxic lies about yourself. This course is created for small groups, so grab a few other moms and be encouraged!

Do you struggle to teach your child how to pray? How do you instill something deeper when your child just wants to pray for a new xbox?  Like many parents, you likely desire to see your kids engage in a meaningful prayer life. That can be hard! Sometimes kids just get bored when we pray! Or find it difficult to get past a surface-level prayer. The good news: There are many practical and effective ways to model and encourage your kids to grow in more heartfelt and personal prayer. Today on the Connected Families podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Chad and Carma Hayenga about their journey to a deeper and more personal prayer life. You’ll hear how this overflowed to their kids, and positively changed the heart of their family. We trust you will find encouragement and practical tips in this podcast to teach your child to pray and for your family’s prayer journey! In this podcast, Chad and Carma discuss:  The transforming power of experiencing Jesus’ presence in prayerHow to transform rote and programmed prayers into a personal conversation with GodA larger vision for your family’s prayer life, as well as practical everyday prayer opportunitiesWays to help kids express their faith creatively according to their personality and giftsParticipating in God’s Kingdom work at home and around the world through prayer More about Chad and Carma:  Chad Hayenga is a Marriage and Family Therapist and certified life coach with a background in counseling struggling youth and families. As a prayer intercessor, Carma has a deep passion to see families changed through the power of prayer. Combining their skills, and trusting in the power of the Holy Spirit to effect change, they have seen people experience incredible spiritual freedom. Interested in learning more? Check out this unique coaching option to connect personally with Chad and Carma. Resources about prayer mentioned in this podcast: Prison to Praise by Merlin Carothers Is That Really You, God? by Loren Cunningham Voice of the Martyrs FREE magazine subscription

Frequently parents focus on conversation skills when there is conflict. But what about in the normal day-to-day interactions? Do you feel like it is more difficult than it needs to be to have a “normal” conversation with your child? Do you feel like you spend a lot of time telling your child what to do instead of asking the right questions? It’s hard when you feel like, “My child won’t talk to me!”Sadly, sometimes our reactions as parents is what shuts the conversation down. Can you relate? If so, this podcast discussion will bring you the honest and hope-giving guidance you are looking for as you desire to have open and honest conversations with your kids.  In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Chad Hayenga (therapist and Connected Families parent coach) to talk about how you can engage in meaningful, on-going conversations that bring connection with your child. You can keep the important conversations going with your kids by asking gentle, light-hearted, curious questions that help your child feel safe to open up to you.  In this podcast, we’ll discuss: The power of kind and curious questions to unlock a child’s heartKeeping shame out of the conversation with your childHow to respond when kids have doubts about their faith and GodPractical ways to calmly respond when your child says something that triggers you! The importance of your strong, solid foundation in Christ to create stability for your struggling child Connecting to and valuing what is going on in your child’s heart can keep the conversation going for years to come! Parenting resources mentioned in this podcast: The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. (online course) Want to learn more for when, “My child won’t talk to me!” Stay Curious During Tough Conversations: Why Lectures Never Win Connected Families Framework  Related PostsAre You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35My Child Doesn’t Believe in God. Now What?My Child Wants Nothing to Do With Me. Is There Hope?Why Is My Child So Angry? The #1 Unexpected Reason & Practical Steps to TakeYou Don’t Want to Micromanage Your Family: How to Stop Parenting With Anxiety

You’re in the grocery store. Or the park. Or at a family gathering. And you sense a major meltdown coming. It’s so embarrassing when your child has a meltdown in public – especially when you know other people are watching! Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they offer practical and down-to-earth solutions to this real-life struggle. This podcast addresses some common questions we frequently hear, such as: “What should I do when my child is having a meltdown in public?”“Is there a time and place for immediate obedience, and what does that look like?”“How can I better connect with my child in a discipline situation?” Along with these helpful insights, you’ll gain a crucial “big picture” perspective of your (and your child’s) identity as God’s beloved children. Not perfect parents with well-behaved kids, but imperfect parents and kids learning together in the love and grace of Jesus. Bible references mentioned in this podcast: The Parable of the Two Sons (Matthew 21:28-32)Jesus’ Warnings to the Pharisees (Matthew 23:25-36) Want to learn more about how to help your child when they meltdown in public? Connected Families FrameworkDiscipline that Connects with Your Child’s Heart (book)FREE Resources to Strengthen Connection with Your Child Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child. Related Posts50 Self-Regulation Activities To Empower Your Child To CalmAvoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You ThinkBut What About My Toddler?Practical Tips To Turn Uncontrolled Emotional Outbursts Into Big WinsWhy Is My Child So Angry? The #1 Unexpected Reason & Practical Steps to Take

In today’s episode we dig into the second part of our series on raising overcomers! Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) talk about how to help kids develop resilience and, in the process, uncover the unique purpose God has for them.  If you feel like your child quits everything too soon then this is the podcast for you. Does your child get stuck in defeat? Or have trouble moving forward when things feel too hard? These can be beautiful opportunities to see the gifts beneath their struggling behavior. You can encourage and strengthen your child to do hard things while communicating to them, “I’m with you in this, we’re going to do it together.” This podcast explores: Two key ingredients you need to help you and your kids work through challengesHow to model resilience with peace and connection when you feel like your child quits everythingThe gift-gone-awry underneath your child’s struggle with resilienceHow to create an environment that can provide the foundation to teach kids resilienceA mother’s story of how she helped her son tackle a frustrating situation Resiliency resources mentioned in this podcast: The Foundations of the Resiliency Framework by Bonnie Benard Want to learn more?  12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind Them: Seeing Strengths even in Struggles Connecting to your child through our Connected Families Framework To learn more, register for our online course The Entitlement Fix: Growing Hard Work and Gratitude In Your Kids! This fast-paced 4-session course is designed to give parents a solid strategy for stamping out entitled attitudes, and moving toward greater meaning in life. You’ll learn to take your kids through a simple process for helping your family have constructive conversations about rights, responsibilities, and privileges in your home. You’ll learn graceful responses for the inevitable conflict that emerges when parents confront selfishness.  Most importantly, you’ll learn a perspective that grounds all your efforts in eternal truths from the Bible.

In this raw and candid episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss both the challenges and the beauty of raising overcomers. When you are in Christ you are an overcomer, and you can graciously raise your child to move beyond feeling overwhelmed to being a resilient overcomer. While in the refuge of God’s grace and hope, trials and challenges can be a profound opportunity to grow resilience in your child. This starts with the foundational mindset that learning and teaching resilience is a process. These challenges also invite you to model resilience to your kids! This podcast dives into: What resilience looks like (and what it doesn’t look like!) Practical dialogues to have with your kids that encourage resilience The importance of modeling your own resilience to your kids The grace and promises of God as He walks with you and your kids through tough circumstances How to communicate to your kids that you are for them; that you are in this together! Encouraging scripture mentioned in this podcast: Philippians 4:13 Romans 15:13 Proverbs 3:5-6 Want to learn more about raising overcomers? Turn a Big Meltdown into a Big Win! Michael Phelps’ Secret…And What it Tells Us About Parenting Build Your Resilience Also mentioned in this podcast: The Entitlement Fix: Growing Hard Work and Gratitude In Your Kids! This fast-paced 4-session course is designed to give parents a solid strategy for stamping out entitled attitudes, and moving toward greater meaning in life. Join us today! At $23, we believe this is a fantastic value. If this is still out of your reach, simply contact us for a scholarship.

Do you feel like bedtime struggles are a losing battle? Does bedtime leave you feeling exhausted? Your child wants another glass of water, another bedtime story. They’re afraid of the dark. Or overflowing with wound-up energy from the day. You are exhausted. Frustrated. And if your kids are struggling to sleep, you don’t sleep!  We have heard your cries! Kids not going to sleep (or staying asleep) is a fairly frequent concern we hear from parents during coaching sessions. If you feel like you have tried everything and wonder why nothing is working, you’re in the same boat as so many other sleep-deprived families!  As parents we sometimes want to push through this time to bring some peace to the end of our day. But what if bedtime could be a way to tap into your child’s heart in a way that makes them feel safe, understood, and loved? What if you change your mindset to see that when your child is struggling to sleep this could be an opportunity for deep connection? It really can be! You can transform difficult bedtime routines into an opportunity for deep and lasting connection with your child. How? In this podcast we’ll introduce you to a unique and holistic approach that gets to the heart of your child. We’ll give practical, science-based, tips that you can use today.  Listen in as Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Lynne Jackson, co-founder of Connected Families and author of Transform Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime Snuggles. (Our newest resource!) Together they discuss ways to help prepare both you and your child for a peaceful night of rest. This podcast dives deep into: Obstacles that can hinder kids from a good night’s sleepPractical sleep solutions that really workCalming your child’s body, mind, heart, and spirit to help them sleepHow a connected approach to bedtime can bring peace to your evenings Sleep and parenting resources mentioned in this podcast: eBook: Transforming Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime SnugglesBook: Why We SleepBook: The Opposite of WorryPsalm 4:8Isaiah 41:13Connected Families FREE Resources Want to learn more? Connected Families FrameworkHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids The sweet bedtime cuddles you dream of deteriorate far too often into mayhem. You’ve got this! Bring peace to your child’s body, mind, heart, and spirit. So they (and you!) can sleep well. Download and read our FREE in-depth ebook Transform Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime Snuggles. Related Posts50 Self-Regulation Activities To Empower Your Child To CalmHow I Helped My Baby Sleep When Sleep Training Was Not WorkingHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30How to Stop Attention-Seeking Behavior Before It StartsHow to Teach Your Child Not to Be Scared | Ep. 39

Few things can be more frustrating as a parent than trying to mediate sibling rivalry. You want your kids to be friends but instead they are fighting, badgering, and teasing each other. It feels like you are getting nowhere!  You think, “How do I stop him from hitting others?” or “Why can’t my kids just get along?!” But what if we could use sibling conflict as an opportunity to explain emotions and feelings to a child? You know what the cool thing is? Sibling rivalry is the perfect opportunity for teaching emotional awareness and explaining about feelings and emotions to a child. If you’re looking for an emotional intelligence activity, look no further. Just wait for the next time your kids start arguing—probably some time in the next nine minutes. An opportunity to explain emotions and feelings to a child When kids fight with siblings or playmates, their selfish tendencies can get the best of them. But there is real hope: When you as a parent express empathy, you can unlock your child’s big emotions. You can also teach your kids to have empathy for each other. How? By explaining to your child about feelings and emotions, and giving them the language and skills to identify those feelings in themselves and each other. Today’s episode is the second part in a series about The Power of Empathy. Join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) as they discuss this super common challenge. You’ll learn solid steps and practical strategies to help you walk your kids through conflict in a way that strengthens their relationship. You can help your kids learn to value each other and to feel a lasting connection. This podcast is full of insight, ideas, and brain-science as we talk about feelings and emotions and how we explain these to a child. Listen to the podcast to learn: How to apply empathy to sibling conflictHow to help kids connect physical sensations with emotionsCreative ways to teach emotional intelligence in a fun non-shaming wayThe need to understand ourselves before we can understand or have empathy for others and how that relates to teaching our children about feelings and empathy Emotional intelligence resources mentioned in this podcast: Part 1 of our Empathy Series: The Power of Empathy: How to Teach Your Child to “Feel Another’s Feelings” Blog article: Can True Empathy Really Be Taught to Kids?Dr. Dan Siegel: Name It to Tame ItEmotions chartThe “just right challenge”Connected Families “Anger e-book” (FREE!) Want to learn more? Check out our Connected Families Framework In our online course Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their own arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us today so your kids can begin building the relationships you always imagined.

“How do you think that makes your sister feel?” or “You can’t do that to him!” Sound familiar? As a parent you likely want your child to be known as kind, generous, sensitive, and empathetic. These expectations can cause stress and anxiety if we see our child behaving in a way that lacks the power of empathy.  Empathy is a natural skill we are born with, right? Nope. What is natural for kids? To be selfish, egocentric, and not think about the feelings of others. So you might be wondering, “Can empathy be taught to kids?” Absolutely.  Today, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families). Together they offer hopeful solutions and practical insights that can graciously guide you and your child toward empathy, using our Connected Families Framework for parenting. It may be a longer journey for some kids than others, but you’ll be equipped with the tools to start them in the right direction! In todays episode, you’ll learn: Practical ways to nurture brain pathways that help develop empathyHow to engage with and teach empathy in sibling conflictThe power of gentle, thoughtful questions to draw out empathy from your childHow Jesus modeled empathy Mentioned in this podcast: Hebrews 4:15-16Video: Brené Brown on Empathy (Kid Friendly!) Video: Brené Brown on EmpathyPrayer of Saint Francis Want to learn more? Can True Empathy Really be Taught to Kids?20 Statement that Communicate Empathy to KidsThe Five Powerful Results of Empathy In our Sibling Conflict online course we teach parents how to teach their kids the four steps of The Peace Process. Whether you have constant sibling battles in your home or you want to lay a strong foundation of reconciliation, enroll in the course! You’ll be helping your kids build a lifetime of healthy conflict resolution.

Do you ever feel like you want to try and fix your marriage? Or change something about your spouse? The solution to this challenge might surprise you! In this podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) are hosted by their good friend, Ellie Hope Collins, on her podcast Hope Reclaimed. We are passionate about building strong marriages as a vital piece of the parenting puzzle! In honor of Valentine’s Day, we have a special episode for you on emotionally safe marriages. “Our marriage is all built on this strange, quirky, messy foundation of grace, of safety, of identity in Christ.” -Jim Jackson Listen in as Jim, Lynne, and Ellie have a candid, thought-provoking conversation about building a strong foundation of honesty and communication in marriage. Jim and Lynne share how they have successfully applied parts of the Connected Families Framework to their own marriage. This podcast is full of marriage and communication tips you can use today! We trust you will finish feeling encouraged and equipped. In today’s episode, learn more about: how to embrace your spouse’s quirks without letting them drive you crazy!building a solid foundation of safety by asking, “What’s going on in me?” getting back to connection after conflict.avoiding the “shame-blame” cycle.the sacred role of God’s grace and mercy while working through marriage struggles.  Mentioned in this podcast: Matthew 5:23, 24 Matthew 18 Want to learn more? Fighting for Love–Even When it’s Hard What Could Have Ruined Our Marriage How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites Host bio: Giving support to men and women healing from divorce, trauma and betrayal, Ellie Hope Collins is the founder of the ministry Hope Reclaimed. Through podcasts, live and virtual events, and the Healing From Divorce Online Course, she has helped thousands of men and women recognize that healing is available. Ellie hails from St. Paul, Minnesota where she lives with her husband, Austin.  *This podcast originally aired in July of 2019 .stk-l3zg5qe{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-l3zg5qe-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-l3zg5qe-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElement('script'); script.src = "https://paperform.co/__embed.min.js"; document.body.appendChild(script); })() Related PostsFighting For Love – Even When It’s HardHow I Responded When My Spouse Confessed Attraction for Someone ElseHow to Parent Together When You’re Total OppositesThe Best Defense against “Hook-up Culture” is a Good OffenseWhat Could Have Ruined Our Marriage

Your strong-willed child is refusing to choose. You are offering two choices, just like you’ve learned. “Give your child some choices,” they said. “It will help them feel some control,” they said. But your child just stamps their foot and refuses to choose. You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! During the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, parents ask questions in a moderated format. We wanted to bring some of these questions (and their answers!)  to you, our podcast community! Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects online course)  is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the second episode in a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions! In this episode we answer the questions: “How do I remain patient with my strong-willed and stubborn child refuses to choose? I feel like I am going to lose it!”“Both my 15-month-old and 5-year-old are hitting other kids when they don’t get what they want. How should I respond?”“What are the strengths underneath my child’s misbehavior?”“How do I help my child learn to make it right?” (Coaching kids to think wisely in discipline situations, or when they’ve hurt someone.) It has not been an easy season of parenting. We would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change! Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year. Join us today! Registration closes on Feb 8th.  Mentioned in this podcast: Meet Kara who Lives in Thailand (child struggling with choices mentioned in podcast)Book: Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s HeartPhilippians 4:6-7Connected Families Framework for parenting Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course this winter. Registration closes on February 8th! Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.​Check out our Connected Families Framework​To get more insight into today’s topic check out: Connecting with Toddler & Teens During Discipline Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child. Related PostsEnjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44How to Connect with Your Kids in Any Circumstance | Ep. 47The God-Given Gifts in Your Child’s Misbehavior | Ep. 49Want To Know Your Child’s Strengths?

You have work to do and need to move on from playing with your child. They don’t want you to go. And they whine. They fuss. What can you do when your child struggles to transition? You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course)  is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the first of a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions! In short: Your greatest opportunity to show unconditional love to your child is during a discipline situation!  In this episode we answer the questions: “How can I best calm myself when my child is struggling?”“What should I do when my child hits me?”“How can I make bedtime go more smoothly?”“My child wants to keep playing with me and I have things I have to do. What are some ways I can help them transition?” It has not been an easy season of parenting for many of our listeners, and we would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change. Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year! (Your kids will thank you!) Mentioned in this podcast: The Connected Families Framework for parentingRomans 5:82 Corinthians 10:5 Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.​Check out our Connected Families Framework​To get more insight into today’s topic check out: Safety First: Creating a Culture of Security and Well-Being in Your Home Want to learn more about these concepts? Download our one hour recording of a Discipline That Connects workshop. Related PostsHow to Become an Emotionally Safe ParentHow to Stop Attention-Seeking Behavior Before It StartsThe Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceTo Spank or Not to Spank?What to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40

It takes skill to misbehave! A verbal child often argues with you until you’re exhausted. An emotional child might cry or manipulate. A physical child is more likely to get aggressive or grab something they want. Though it feels frustrating and even counter-intuitive, a shift in attention to your child’s strengths by finding their gift-gone-awry can help. Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Together they talk about the third part of the Connected Families framework: You are CALLED and CAPABLE! They discuss the transformational idea of finding the gifts beneath your child’s misbehavior. The challenge for parents is to identify the “gift” within the misbehavior; what we call a “Gift-Gone-Awry.”  In this podcast* Jim and Lynne share: a life-giving vision to reframe your child’s gifts gone awrythe importance of embracing this challenging visionhow Jesus saw and encouraged a gift-gone-awrypractical strategies for identifying, not suppressing, your child’s gifts We also hear from Jessica, an alum from our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. She shares a practical example of looking for the gift-gone-awry in a tough situation with her son. Before taking the course, her approach to discipline unintentionally communicated to her son, “You are a problem!” Now their relationship has been transformed as she is learning to view her son as someone gifted for God’s good purposes! Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Check out our Connected Families Framework Get more insight into today’s topic: 12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind Them Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview. *This podcast originally aired in September of 2019. Related PostsCommunicating Love in the Midst of Misbehavior | Ep. 12Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14What Does It Mean to Be an Emotionally Safe Parent? | Ep. 11

Recently, we introduced you to Juan and Nita from South Africa. Today, we are excited to bring you a more in-depth interview where they share their heart for their two daughters as well as the 196 children who live in LIV village.  They are learning that demanding respect from children often doesn’t work in the long run. Married for almost 12 years, Juan and Nita are the parents of two children and cross-cultural missionaries in their native South Africa. Listen in as they tell of the exciting work God is doing through the Connected Families’ Discipline That Connect With Your Child’s Heart online course. They have seen transformation not only in their own family, but in the school where they work.  Nita cried out to God for help both in their home, and in the school where they work. God answered her prayer through a friend who introduced her to the Connected Families resources. After using these resources, Nita noticed significant positive changes in the way she parented and related to her children. Juan works at LIV Village with orphaned and vulnerable children who have experienced trauma. He has seen remarkable changes in both himself and the kids through the principles learned in the Discipline That Connects online course. In this episode you will: Hear the story of God’s work through Connected Families in cross-cultural situations. Discover the power of the Gospel in how God parents us. And also get ideas for how we can extend that same grace to our children. Learn how the Connected Families Framework is lived out in practical, everyday life. Mentioned in this episode: Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course The Connected Families Framework Connected Families free resources Ready to dive in and learn more about the Framework? Our 8-session online course, Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart will guide you through each level of the Framework. If you’re looking for a grace-filled way to parent, this course is for you! .stk-cov2efc-inner-blocks{row-gap:0px !important}.stk-cov2efc{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-3,#293241) !important;background-image:url(https://connectedfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/Optimized-Dad-Kissing-Crying-Daughters-Cheek.jpg) !important;padding-top:0px !important;padding-right:0px !important;padding-bottom:0px !important;padding-left:0px !important}.stk-cov2efc:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-3,#293241) !important;opacity:0.3 !important}.stk-cov2efc-container{background-color:#00000080 !important}.stk-cov2efc-container:before{background-color:#00000080 !important}.stk-cov2efc .stk-block-hero__content{max-width:35% !important;margin-right:auto !important;margin-left:0px !important}@media screen and (max-width:999px){.stk-cov2efc .stk-block-hero__content{max-width:259px !important}}@media screen and (max-width:689px){.stk-cov2efc .stk-block-hero__content{max-width:205px !important}} .stk-53atm2q .stk-block-heading__text{color:#FFFFFF !important}@media screen and (max-width:689px){.stk-53atm2q .stk-block-heading__text{font-size:23px !important}}.stk-53atm2q.stk-block-heading{white-space:normal !important;overflow-wrap:break-word !important;word-wrap:break-word !important;max-width:100% !important}Parent with Confidence Discipline with Love .stk-odcw05t .stk-block-text__text{font-size:18px !important;color:#FFFFFF !important}@media screen and (max-width:999px){.stk-odcw05t .stk-block-text__text{font-size:18px !important}}Take the 8-session online course Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart . .stk-gvj1va8 .stk-button{background:var(--theme-palette-color-1,#ee6c4d) !important}.stk-gvj1va8 .stk-button:hover:after{background:var(--theme-palette-color-2,#98c1d9) !important;opacity:1 !important}.stk-gvj1va8 .stk-button__inner-text{font-size:21px !important;color:var(--theme-palette-color-8,#ffffff) !important;font-weight:600 !important}@media screen and (max-width:999px){.stk-gvj1va8 .stk-button__inner-text{font-size:16px !important}}@media screen and (max-width:689px){.stk-gvj1va8 .stk-button__inner-text{font-size:14px !important}}REGISTER NOW! Related PostsFear-Based Compliance vs. Heartfelt Obedience: How to Avoid One & Inspire the OtherMeet Juan and Nita from South AfricaMeet a Family of Four from MongoliaThis Is Better Than My Old Consequences for a Disrespectful ChildWhat Causes Anger Issues in a Child? | Ep. 46

As you’re heading into some potentially stressful situations over the next few weeks (changing schedules, relatives who might judge your parenting, or not feeling connected to your kiddos) take some time and listen to this encouraging podcast we pulled out of the archives. (This podcast originally aired in 2015.) Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, were interviewed by Heather MacFadyen of the Don’t Mom Alone podcast (formally God Centered Mom). While some of the scenarios may not be relevant to today (car rides to see relatives, eating in restaurants), they give some really practical tips and scripts that can always be used, whatever the circumstance. With an overview of the Connected Families Framework for parenting, you will feel equipped to keep your cool (and even connect!) with your kids during this time. The strategies and stories discussed will give you a vision for hope-filled holidays. Highlights of their conversation: Why kids can behave better at school/other places and fall apart at home.Helping your kids get through challenging scenarios, like traveling and restaurants.How to connect with your kids when you don’t even like them.Do you feel like relatives might judge your parenting? Learn to recognize your need to get your parents’ approval (the grandparents) when kids misbehave. What to do when you are trying to connect with your child and they are not responding. So, maybe while running errands, wrapping gifts, or folding laundry listen to this interview. You’ll be refreshed, encouraged and challenged. You might even come out on the other side of Christmas with an extra measure of joy! Blessings as you lead your family with grace this holiday season! Mentioned in this podcast: Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course Sibling Conflict online course .stk-pgvt2z3{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-pgvt2z3-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-pgvt2z3-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElement('script'); script.src = "https://paperform.co/__embed.min.js"; document.body.appendChild(script); })() Related PostsBuilding Wisdom When Kids Want Gifts…and More GiftsChristmas: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year?Family Gatherings | Ep. 16Here’s How to Seize the Opportunity When Your Child Feels DistantTop 4 Tips to Make This the Best Christmas YetWhen Your Child Just HAS To Have That Thing for Christmas…

What do you do when your child gets angry? What causes anger issues in a child? When kids respond with angry, aggressive behavior, stress and fear are often the underlying emotions. Children who have experienced trauma often react with heightened fear responses. In this podcast episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, continue their conversation with Lisa Qualls about parenting kids from hard places. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. In today’s episode, they talk about the importance of nurturing to connect, attach, and create safety with your child. “When we nurture a child we are really disarming that fear response. We’re bringing them into a calm space where they feel and know that they are precious and loved.” -Lisa Qualls As parents, we can learn to understand our child’s fear and how it affects their body. With some basic tools and preparation, you can work to get ahead of your child’s needs and help them avoid a heightened state of fear. You can bring regulation and calm to your child through thoughtful nurture: bringing them close and meeting their needs.   In this episode you will: hear practical ways to nurture your child, even when they are angry learn how cortisol affects your child’s body discover tools to meet kids’ sensory needs learn how to disarm fear and meet the physical need Mentioned in this episode: The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development “One Thankful Mom” – Lisa Qualls’ website The Adoption Connection – Lisa Qualls’ podcast Connected Families Comprehensive Sensory Activities List 50 Self-Regulation Activities to Empower Your Child to Calm Related Posts50 Self-Regulation Activities To Empower Your Child To CalmParenting Kids from Hard Places with Unique Needs | Ep. 45Why Is My Child So Angry? The #1 Unexpected Reason & Practical Steps to Take .stk-n01ng65{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important;padding-top:0px !important;padding-right:0px !important;padding-bottom:0px !important;padding-left:0px !important}.stk-n01ng65:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important}.stk-n01ng65-container{box-shadow:7px 5px 30px rgba(72,73,121,0.15) !important}.stk-n01ng65 .stk-block-hero__content{min-height:500px !important;align-items:center !important;display:flex !important} .stk-37i92lj{margin-bottom:0px !important}@media screen and (max-width:689px){.stk-37i92lj-column{--stk-col-order-1:2 !important;--stk-col-order-2:1 !important}} .stk-5pqbp9e{align-self:center !important}.stk-5pqbp9e-container{max-width:450px !important} .stk-swiu53r .stk-block-heading__text{font-size:55px !important;color:var(--theme-palette-color-4,#1e3f52) !important}@media screen and (max-width:999px){.stk-swiu53r .stk-block-heading__text{font-size:50px !important}}You need consequences that work. .stk-j1c4srw .stk-block-heading__text{font-size:35px !important;color:var(--theme-palette-color-4,#1e3f52) !important}@media screen and (max-width:999px){.stk-j1c4srw .stk-block-heading__text{font-size:35px !important}}You need consequences that work. Because your kids aren’t perfect. Neither are you. That’s why you need a plan for discipling your kids in the hard moments. .stk-c5oiolg .stk-block-text__text{color:var(--theme-palette-color-1,#ee6c4d) !important;font-weight:600 !important}Read the FREE ebook, Consequences That Actually Work. .stk-wpf8fjj-container{margin-top:0px !important;margin-right:0px !important;margin-bottom:0px !important;margin-left:0px !important} .stk-h804cnv .stk-img-wrapper{height:750px !important}.stk-h804cnv .stk-img-wrapper img{object-fit:contain !important}@media screen and (max-width:689px){.stk-h804cnv .stk-img-wrapper{width:100% !important;height:500px !important}.stk-h804cnv .stk-img-wrapper img{object-fit:contain !important}}

Are you parenting a child through adoption or foster care? Are you struggling with bonding to your child or their attachment to you? Your feelings of isolation and discouragement can be very real and overwhelming.  As an adoptive parent, maybe you’ve experienced a heightened sense of grief as you search for answers in unfamiliar parenting territory. If you are looking for practical hope, you will find both solidarity and strategies here for your parenting journey. NOTE: Even if you are not parenting a child through adoption or foster care, we encourage you to take the time to listen. You will undoubtedly begin to understand the complexities your friends who have adopted experience daily.  You may even pick up a few tips that can be applied in your own family! On today’s podcast: Today on the Connected Families Podcast, co-founders Jim and Lynne Jackson interview special guest, Lisa Qualls. Lisa and her husband are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment.  As a seasoned biological parent, Lisa did not anticipate the extent of the trauma and intense behavior in her children who joined their family through adoption. While witnessing these extreme behaviors, she watched the foundation of her family begin to crumble. After finding new hope and new resources in Dr. Purvis’ book, The Connected Child, the idea for The Connected Parent was born. This book combines real-life strategies taken from Dr. Karyn Purvis’ knowledge, with experiences from Lisa’s everyday life.  Listen as Jim and Lynne discuss the foundations of the Connected Families Framework with Lisa. Together they also explore the mission of the Karyn Purvis Institute, and the importance of the foundation of safety and attachment. In this episode you will: find hope and guidance in parenting children from hard placesreceive practical ideas for connecting with your struggling childdiscover the power of using “simple scripts” in your parentinghear about the importance of self-calm in becoming a safe parent learn more about the Connected Families Framework  Mentioned in this episode: Connected Families FrameworkThe Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and AttachmentKaryn Purvis Institute of Child Development“One Thankful Mom” – Lisa Qualls’ websiteThe Adoption Connection – Lisa Qualls’ podcast Related PostsAdapting Christmas…for children who joined your family through adoptionDoes Giving Time Outs Actually Help Your Child?My Misconceptions About Adoption—And, Well, All Parenting .stk-58k0h6t-container:hover{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-6, #e4eff5) !important;}.stk-58k0h6t-container:hover:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-6, #e4eff5) !important;} Learn more about the Framework Want to dig deeper into Connected Families’ Parenting Framework? Get our FREE ebook, What Kids Need: 4 Messages That Build Identity.

Are you scrambling to find clarity and help in your parenting? Are you struggling to find practical tools that bring lasting change? Do you wish you enjoyed your children more? Discover the power of connection and the hope of restoring a more peaceful relationship with your child! How one mom learned to enjoy her children Today’s guest is Emily, an alum of the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course. Emily and her husband have three boys. They experienced many of the typical challenges parents often face, as well as a rough transition in the adoption of their third son. The stress of this transition was causing intense behavior in her children, and Emily knew she needed a different way to discipline than the way she had disciplined prior to their adoption. After hearing from friends who attended a workshop led by Jim and Lynne Jackson, Emily knew this was the way she wanted to parent. She signed up for the DTC online course, and discovered the power of the Connected Families framework. In the course she learned the importance of self-evaluation: “What’s  going on in me as a parent?” She also gained a more empathetic view of her children, and found that the way God relates to us can inspire how we connect with our children. Instead of trying to fix her kids’ behavior, Emily began using wisdom to guide her children toward the gifts that God instilled in them. She saw her children soften toward her, and toward the message of the gospel of Jesus’ love. Bringing God’s grace to your parenting Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they share Emily’s story. Everything we do and teach at Connected Families flows through the ideas that we present in this online course. In short: it is a way of parenting that brings God’s grace and truth into the daily interactions with your children.  In this episode you will: Discover how to build a foundation of connectedness and attachment with your child.Learn the importance of finding the gift gone awry; of looking at the gifting beneath the misbehavior, and helping your children use their gifts the way God designed.Hear how the framework can provide unity of vision with your spouse in parenting.Find hope that you can enjoy your children the way you’ve always wanted to. Mentioned in this episode: Ephesians 2:10 .stk-of2r1pm{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-of2r1pm-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-of2r1pm-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElement('script'); script.src = "https://paperform.co/__embed.min.js"; document.body.appendChild(script); })() Related PostsI Was a Critical Parent: 6 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving WayMy Child Wants Nothing to Do With Me. Is There Hope?To Spank or Not to Spank?Walking in Peace and Joy with Your Kids | Ep. 23Want To Know Your Child’s Strengths?

Feeling burned out at the end of the day? Does parenting (and discipline) leave you feeling overwhelmed and discouraged?  If you are feeling “parenting burnout” there is help and hope. Perhaps you will identify with our guests today, Nate and Amanda. This couple joins us to discuss the burnout parents often face in the discipline process with their kids. What does parenting burnout look like? Like so many couples, Nate and Amanda were enthusiastic and confident before their children were born. They were ready with ideas about how they would parent and connect with their children. Yet, like many of us, they discovered that the reality of parenting did not always match those expectations. They had great intentions, but struggled to put those intentions into action.  As parents, we can get tired and discouraged. Do you feel yourself grasping for control and wanting an immediate fix for your child’s behavior?  Often the desire to get the right behavior from our kids can impede the relationship and cause us to lose opportunities to connect.   What’s going on in me? Amanda and Nate found new hope and perspective after taking the Discipline That Connects online course. They learned to build a foundation of safety for their children by asking themselves, “What is going on in me?” Amanda noticed that her anxiety about her children’s future caused more exhaustion and brought more tension to the situation. By implementing the practical and biblical strategies they learned together in the course, Nate and Amanda began walking a new path to decrease stress and bring energy back to their parenting.  Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they talk with Nate and Amanda about the DTC course, and a long term vision for parenting that builds safety and connection. Hear about our unique combination of a biblical framework and a practical science-based approach that can totally shift how you view discipline, and help you build connection with your kids. In this episode you will: Discover how to parent from a place of peace and calm.Learn the value of staying in the moment (and avoid catastrophizing!).Hear practical examples from parents who have been through the course, and how it helped them create more connection with their kids.Learn the power of do-overs and developing new brain pathways to help kids make better choices.Get an overview of the Connected Families framework.  Want to learn more? Jim recorded this 38-minute audio thinking about dads (although moms can listen too!). If your wife has recently been digging into our material and is urging you to “get on board!” this is a great place to start!

“My kids will never grow up to be responsible!” “I am a terrible parent, and my child and I will never get along!” Are you parenting from a place of fear? Even catastrophizing a situation? Do you find yourself replaying negative thoughts in your mind about yourself and your child? You are absolutely not alone! It’s easy to let fears about our parenting and our kids grip us and cause anxiety. Toxic beliefs can affect our own hearts, and the hearts of our children. These beliefs are like a recording that plays over and over in our head. We hear a voice that says we don’t measure up, or we make negative assumptions about our kids, and we act out on those beliefs. This kind of thinking can cause us to parent from a place of fear. Your intentions are probably good. You want to become more aware of what’s going on inside your heart, and guide your children from a place of calm and peace. One mom’s story of parenting from a place of fear Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), in an honest conversation about why it is so important to identify our toxic beliefs and replace them with grace-filled truth. Learn practical steps you can take to tame these beliefs and lead your family without fear.  Also joining us is Rebecca, a mom who took our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online parenting course. Rebecca shares the impact of this course, and how over time it improved her connection with her children. Listen as she shares her struggles with her own fears and toxic beliefs, and how she learned to replace those beliefs with thoughts that encourage safety and connection. In this episode, you will: Gain insight into why we sometimes parent from fear, and wisdom in working toward parenting from joy and peace.Learn to identify toxic beliefs, take those thoughts captive, and replace them with grace-filled truth. Hear practical ways to model self-calming strategies to your kids.Discover more about the Connected Families Framework, and how to build the foundation for connection and safety with your kids. Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.  Related Posts3 Reasons Kids Misbehave & How You Can Respond With Grace and Love4 Simple Ways to Bridge the Mother-Son DivideAm I a Bad Parent? | Ep. 28My Child Wants Nothing to Do With Me. Is There Hope?Sometimes I Cry About My Parenting MistakesThe Parenting Pitfall We All Get Stuck InYou Don’t Want to Micromanage Your Family: How to Stop Parenting With Anxiety

Are your kids scared of the world around them?  How are you talking about anxiety with your kids these days?  In current times coping is harder, and there seems to be more reasons to worry than usual. You may experience tension when your family gathers because everyone views what’s happening in our world through different lenses, and with different opinions. Relationships with some of the most important people in your lives seem at risk. It can be hard to talk about things that concern or upset us.  When we are anxious, our kids are the first to know. Kids have a keen radar that senses when things are off in our world. When their radar picks up anxiety, the anxiety spreads.  In today’s episode, we discuss the anxiety that can come from things we can’t control, the things that happen outside our walls: Social unrest, pandemics, politics,  and school policies and decisions.   We WILL have trouble in this world Jesus promises we will have trouble in this world. In the midst of such trouble, you have a unique opportunity to empower your kids to be thoughtful and compassionate in their relationships with others. Learning to approach your kids with grace and wisdom can help keep your family grounded, and growing in God’s love and purposes, during uncertain times. This podcast is the fourth and final episode in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with close colleague and marriage and family therapist, Chad Hayenga, discuss this relevant topic from a faith-filled, biblically-oriented perspective. In this episode This episode is packed full of rich conversation and practical insights about tough topics. In this episode you will: Explore habits that keep you grounded and help you “take every thought captive.”Discover how to have honest conversations with your kids with a “Big Picture” perspective.Learn how to communicate to your kids: “You are called and capable of figuring out even these really challenging problems!”Hear practical ways to have conversations about big feelings with respect and kindness.Gain insight in how to teach kids to wrestle well with their fears, listen better, and learn from the perspectives of others. The reign and the rule of Jesus’ kingdom is as present and powerful now more than ever. We are all called to be part of this heavenly kingdom. Whatever trouble you are experiencing, the power and force of God’s goodness and grace are the most potent ways to overcome anxiety. Mentioned in this podcast: John 16:33Colossians 3:12,132 Corinthians 10:5John 18:36Philippians 4:6-8Philippians 4:11Matthew 6:25-34Numbers 6:24-26Family Meetings OverviewIs Your Child Refusing to Do Schoolwork?Free Resources from Connected Families Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Want to learn more? This content from this podcast is also available in our blog post called: Teach Your Kids to Trust God…In Times of Unrest and Pandemic. In our online course, The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom., you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today! Here is what Mark and Kim had to say after finishing the course: We wish we’d had this training many years ago when starting our parenting journey, but we’ve found that it’s never too late to connect with each other and build up our family team. Changing our perspective and approaching our children (even the ones who are now young adults!) with light-hearted curiosity instead of judgmental lectures is a game-changer. Related PostsHelp! My Anxious Child Cries When Dropped Off at DaycareHow to Teach Your Child Not to Be Scared | Ep. 39My Child is Afraid of Everything | Ep. 38Teach Your Kids How to Trust GodWhat to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40

Mealtime battles, bedtime drama, homework struggles… Can you relate to these anxiety triggers in your home? Often there are deeper emotions under the surface, for both parents and children, that contribute to these conflicts. When we acknowledge and validate the emotions that drive our children’s anxiety, we can better equip them to self-regulate. Validating emotions also helps us avoid anxiety-producing power struggles. This equips us to approach these struggles in a way that empowers our children to feel safe, loved, and capable. We are excited to bring you episode three in our four-part Anxiety Series. Today Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with Chad Hayenga, marriage and family therapist, dig deeper on what some of the anxiety triggers might be in your home. Listen in as they talk about separation anxiety, homework, school, mealtimes, and more. In this episode about anxiety triggers you’ll learn: Practical ideas to reduce power struggles at mealtimeHow to approach homework battles with compassion while encouraging responsibility at the same timeHow to validate your child’s anxious feelings Ways to empower your children to feel safe and speak up for what they need Mentioned in this podcast: 7 Practical Tips for Picky Eaters Raise a Healthy Child Who Is a Joy to Feed– Ellyn Satter Responding with Compassion When Kids Don’t Make the Grade Practical Help for Families Struggling with Separation Anxiety Bedtime Struggles Connected Families FREE Resources Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related PostsDemanding Kids: “I Want 2 Stories, 5 Kisses, and 10 Hugs”Help Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31Help! My Anxious Child Cries When Dropped Off at DaycareHow to Teach Your Child Not to Be Scared | Ep. 39My Child is Afraid of Everything | Ep. 38Teach Your Kids How to Trust GodWhat to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40What to Do When Kids Are Scared of the World Around Them | Ep. 41Your Child Struggles to Transition. Here’s What to Do. | Episode 50 Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox:

How do you teach your child not to be scared? Bedtime, meals, learning at home, performance anxiety, and separation anxiety can all be sources of anxiety for kids. This is especially true for kids who may be highly sensitive. Kids who struggle with anxiety are often more “on alert” than other children, and don’t always assess danger well.  Kids who are anxious can also get their cues from parents. The more we try to create an environment that keeps kids out of a highly-alert state, the more sense of peace and calm the child can feel. In our previous podcast episode, we discussed how modeling a calm spirit is a vital part of calming an anxious child.  In this episode, you’ll learn how to empower your children to constructively work through their anxiety, and to experience God’s peace and purpose for their lives.   This podcast is the second in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with close colleague, and marriage and family therapist, Chad Hayenga, explore some of the best ways to encourage kids when they experience anxiety. Among the many practical tools in this podcast, you’ll learn:  3 “Don’ts” that can add to your child’s anxiety.3 “Do’s” that can equip your kids with confidence-boosting skills to handle anxiety.How to help your kids feel empowered with a teamwork mentality, and in their God-given identity to be brave. Mentioned in this podcast:  Philippians 4:6,7Ephesians 2:10Joshua 1:9The Opposite of Worry: The Playful Parenting Approach to Childhood Anxieties and Fears (includes the “second chicken” story mentioned in today’s podcast episode)Helping Your Highly Sensitive ChildHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound KidsBuilding Your Inner Coach-Brett LedbetterDan Siegel: Name it to Tame it Wondering if you have a highly sensitive child? Check out the sister article for this podcast: Helping Your Highly Sensitive Child. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related Posts3 Reasons Kids Misbehave & How You Can Respond With Grace and Love3 Unexpected Parenting Strategies to Help Your Highly Sensitive Child ThriveHelp! My Anxious Child Cries When Dropped Off at DaycareHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30Teach Your Kids How to Trust GodWhat to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40What to Do When Kids Are Scared of the World Around Them | Ep. 41 Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.

Do you feel like your child is afraid of everything? Where does anxiety come from in our kids? This is a huge struggle parents often face, especially when tensions are high in the world around us.  A survey Connected Families conducted in spring of 2020 revealed that 70% of families in the CF community have reported elevated levels of anxiety in recent months. If you are experiencing this, you are not alone! Kids’ struggles and misbehavior can increase everyone’s anxiety and the tension in the home. Our own anxious thoughts about children’s misbehavior can cause us to try harder to control kids, which discourages them and escalates the problem.​ Our own anxious thoughts about this behavior can cause discouragement in our children, and can also cause us to become more controlling. ​ You have good intentions to help your child manage their big emotions. What can you do to wrestle well with this issue of anxiety in the home? Today’s podcast is the first in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (MA, LMFT, CLC) discuss the root of our anxiety struggles both for kids and for us as parents.  In this episode: Learn about the cycle that can cause anxiety in both you and your kids.Think practically about your anxiety and how to model healthy habits to your kids. Discover how to take control of negative thoughts and develop a more peaceful mindset.Identify the Antidote Cycle for growing away from the anxious habits we have. Mentioned in this podcast: Philippians 4:6-9 1 John 4:18 2 Corinthians 10:5 How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids Want to learn more? Our blog post “Are You Micromanaging Your Kids?” Here’s How to Stop gives more practical and helpful tips to stop parenting from a place of anxiety. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related PostsHelp! My Anxious Child Cries When Dropped Off at DaycareTeach Your Kids How to Trust GodWhat to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40What to Do When Kids Are Scared of the World Around Them | Ep. 41You Don’t Want to Micromanage Your Family: How to Stop Parenting With Anxiety In our online course, The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom., you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family.

Have you ever heard an outrageous statement from your child? Outrageous statements come in all shapes and sizes and can often trigger disbelief or even outrage in parents. Perhaps that’s why they’re called outrageous statements! It’s tempting for us, as parents, to respond to these situations with immediate correction or a lecture. However, this may result in unhelpful arguments. Hard emotions are often underneath our kid’s outrageous statements. How can we respond with love, connection, and safety to effectively help them grow in wisdom and responsibility?  Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss the power of lighthearted questions in a conversational model that will guide wisdom-building responses in your kids. They also discuss the recently released online course from Connected Families called The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. In today’s episode, you’ll discover: A useful analogy to help you “dig deeper” to understand your child’s underlying emotions.The power of lighthearted questions to build wisdom in your kids rather than “fix” the behavior.A practical conversational model that creates safety in relationships when confronted with outrageous statements from your kids.  Remember, your child is often frustrated and discouraged when they say outrageous things. Learning to find what is going on underneath the surface will better equip you to lead your family with grace. If you want to hear more about what to do when your kids say outrageous things, check out Stop the Crazy All-or-Nothing Thinking with These 4 Steps. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! In our newest online course The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today!

Are you feeling anxious about this summer? Summer can be a fantastic opportunity to connect with your kids, but it can also present new challenges. You want to have a great summer, but aren’t quite sure how to get there. Uncertainty and disappointment add an extra level of stress, especially with the new reality of cancelled activities and plans. In this podcast we will explore how to create a sense of teamwork in your family so summer is enjoyable for everyone. We, as parents, may also have our own fears about navigating difficult battles, such as screen time and boredom. We don’t want to spend the all our time nagging, exasperating, and arguing with our kids! Is it even possible to create a memorable summer while, at the same time, helping our kids grow in wisdom and responsibility? Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss how to build an atmosphere of teamwork and connection with your kids that will equip them and set them up for success. In this podcast, you’ll learn to: Think through your own best hopes for summer. Be thoughtful and proactive in naming potential problem areas. Be intentional and realistic about your summer goals. If you want to learn more, this article complements this podcast well, and has a great story of how a mom used questions to help avoid a power struggle with her toddler. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related Posts4 Summer Tips for Parents Excited for (or Dreading) Summer BreakAre You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35Avoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You ThinkHow to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESHow to Put Screens Back in Their Place | Ep. 34My Kids Fight All the Time! | Ep. 4 In our online course, Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding, we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us! Your kids will thank you.

Does it seem like all you do is nag your kids? Are you frustrated because this is the sixth time you have asked your child to take out the garbage? Nagging and arguing can become the frustrating norm in many of families. Parents have good intentions. We want our kids to grow up to be responsible, right? Our fear and anxiety that our children will not grow up to be responsible adults can cause us to become controlling. This kind of projected negativity has the potential to affect our child’s identity. In fact, brain science reveals that these power struggles can be damaging to our relationship with our kids. Kids may embrace this projected negative identity, which could hinder their ability to grow in God’s good purposes for them.  Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss what it looks like to cut down on nagging and help our kids grow in wisdom and responsibility. They also discuss the recently released online course from Connected Families called The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom.  In this episode you will: learn how to break patterns of defensiveness.discover the power of curious questions to create SAFE, productive conversations. receive a 4-step plan for holding kids accountable.hear an overview of this exciting new course! Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related PostsAvoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You ThinkFun Campfire Questions You Can Use AnytimeHow to Have a Great Summer Without Pestering Your Kids | Ep. 36My Kids Won’t Do Their Chores Without My Nagging | Ep. 5Stop the Crazy All-or-Nothing Thinking with These 4 StepsToddler Discipline Doesn’t Have to Be a BattleWhat to Say When Your Child Makes Outrageous Statements | Ep. 37You Don’t Want to Micromanage Your Family: How to Stop Parenting With AnxietyYour Child’s Grades Don’t Matter (To You) In our online course “The Power of Questions” you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today!

You want to be intentional about screen time with your kids, but you’ve got an uphill battle! The pandemic isn’t making it any easier either. If you’re struggling with how to be intentional about screens, especially when your kids require them more than ever, this is the podcast episode for you. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they dive into the challenges of our kids and their screen time. They discuss how best to approach screen time from a place of connection and guidance, not just enforcing rules. These ideas will equip you to lead your family with grace as you help your children feel capable and responsible when it comes to screen time. In this podcast you’ll:  Learn techniques and skills to connect with your child during the heat of the moment.Hear role plays involving real-life screen time conflict scenarios.Be given tools and scripts to work with your child to problem solve the issue of screen time together. Note: This podcast has a companion blog post. We encourage you to digest both, as there is different and complimenting content in each. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! .stk-x3wab09{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-x3wab09-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-x3wab09-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElement('script'); script.src = "https://paperform.co/__embed.min.js"; document.body.appendChild(script); })() Related Posts52 Out-of-the-Box Family Bonding ActivitiesHow to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESWhat Do You Do with a Minecraft Addiction?

Working at home can be challenging! And exasperating. In this difficult season where many parents are juggling kids and working from home, our “new normal” is anything but normal. Parents are asking, “How do I stop kids interrupting conference calls?” It’s hard to know how to respond to the challenges of interrupted conference calls. But this can be a great opportunity to help kids feel both loved and successful. Applying the Connected Families Framework for parenting can equip you to Connect, Coach, and Correct from a foundation of Safety. (This article is also available as an audio or video download.) Read this article and apply what you’ve learned to experience a more peaceful conference call! What should you do first when kids interrupt an important conference call?  Outside of the immediate challenge, it’s helpful to consider, “What’s going on in me? How do I view this? Am I responsible for having a perfect child?”  Feeling shame and embarassment about your child’s behavior during a conference call causes you to react anxiously, which increases your child’s anxiety and neediness. It may be that a light-hearted “sorry for the delay” to participants is appropriate, but avoid the temptation to repeatedly or emphatically apologize. That’s stressful for you and your child.  If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!  It’s also important to thoughtfully consider, “What’s it like to be my child when I get on a conference call?”  Having an unavailable parent can be tough on kids’ anxiety levels! Research shows that our brains release oxytocin under stressful conditions, especially in social isolation. These elevated oxytocin levels drive an urgency to get help when we feel stressed or anxious. Your child’s demands may be a sign of elevated stress levels. In addition, up until age three or four, a child’s worldview generally revolves around himself. That child will probably not be thinking of your personal comfort during that important call for work.  Considering all this, it doesn’t have to be perfect! Ditch those profuse apologies, take a deep breath, and remember that these are great opportunities to extend God’s grace and mercy to yourself, and to your child.  Want to avoid kids interrupting conference calls? Be proactive. Thoughtful and intentional connection can go a long way! Before your meeting, prepare by connecting well with your child – even if it is just three minutes. Let them know you are delighted in them. Make meaningful eye contact. Fill their cup! Enable them to be peaceful so they can head off to be independent.  One mom, who is working from home, stated, “I have been trying to connect with my kids through short bursts of focused, joy-filled attention frequently throughout the day. It seems to be helping them to play independently for longer periods of time, which is helping me to get things done that I need to.” It probably won’t be helpful to just tell kids not to interrupt. It may even cause more anxiety! Coach them and build skills ahead of time to demonstrate what you want them to do instead. If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!  How can you set your child up for success? Proactive coaching goes a long way in preventing interruptions: Teach your children appropriate ways to ask for attention, like a tap on the arm. Help them practice this new skill by pretending you are on an important call. Give special signs (thumbs up/wink) that communicate: “I see you and I care!” If they want to show you something, let them know they can put their project or drawing in a pre-designated “waiting spot” until the call is over. Keeping this promise, and attending to it right away when the call is done, will build trust.Teach the importance of peaceful waiting. This can be practiced and modeled throughout the ebb and flow of daily life. Teach conflict resolution to decrease the need for your help in a tussle. Check out our Sibling Conflict online course. One mom who is taking the course said she would previously run in during a sibling conflict as the “judge.” She began implementing some of the skills taught in the Sibling Conflict course. Later on, during another conflict, the mom was going to step in to help a conflict, but her seven-year-old said, “I got this mom! We can solve this!” Evaluate which proactive strategy works best for your child. After coaching and practicing, evaluate what works best. Problem-solve based on what you learn from the times when things go better.  Other practical tips that may help:  Avoid having kids do school work during your calls. Keep a bin of toys (new or old favorites) reserved only for when you are on calls. Maybe even have a unique bin for each child.Designate special separate spaces for kids during calls.&nbs

Like many of us, your child might be grieving his pre-coronavirus life. This challenging time can bring strong emotions to the surface in our kids (and in us as parents). These emotions can be signs of a child’s underlying grief. And difficulty in expressing that grief.  Read on to learn why it’s important to allow your children to grieve, and healthy ways to help them process their grief. This article is also available as a video or audio download. Why is it important for our children to grieve? We’re hearing from a lot of parents whose kids still aren’t adjusting well to the new challenges of “Stay-at-Home” orders and social distancing guidelines. Resistance to homework. Power struggles. Tantrums. Withdrawn children. These are just some of the challenges parents are facing. Add to this list the responsibility of managing school work while trying to work from home and you’ve got a recipe for stress and discouragement.  Parents tell us they’re trying to help their kids adjust but making little progress. It’s a tough load! Grief is real! Our kids, right along with the rest of us, are dealing with grief right now. It feels unnatural and even overwhelming to lose our normal life rhythms.  Our kids are likely grieving the loss of school friends and other activities. Their lives have been turned upside-down and they are probably limited in their ability to process those feelings. Many of us can probably relate to this struggling mom: “Dear Connected Families, I need help figuring out how to help my four year old manage his grief over the loss of his wonderful life at preschool. His teachers at his preschool are so loving and he has wonderful friends there. He misses his teachers and friends and wants to hug them and play with them. I’m doing what I can, I bought new puzzles and books.  I’m trying to fill his love tank but he has such intense needs and I have a two year old as well. Please help.”  Are we distracting our children from their grief? As your child struggles, your first inclination may be to distract him with “happy things.” But you don’t want to teach your child to sweep their feelings aside and pretend they don’t exist. Instead, view this as an opportunity to teach a valuable lesson in dealing with disappointment. You probably don’t blatantly order your child to toughen up. However, that might be the message your child hears. If you put more energy into trying to relieve your child’s disappointment than you do into validating it, you may drive the mourning inward.  Kids need permission to feel sad. Sometimes kids have big feelings of grief. But when invalidated, those feelings get locked up inside and come out in twisted ways. They can only intensify an already difficult situation.   Kids need to feel safe and be given permission to express their grief. How to help your child process grief Hard as it is, don’t try to help your kids “get over it.” The best gift you can give them is to be present and to sit with them in their emotions and discontent. Jesus told us, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” There is a direct link between mourning and comfort. The term here for mourning comes from the Greek word, pentheus. It means to express externally what’s being experienced internally. When the grief is deep, it may take some time for even the most mature among us to express the deep things that are pent up inside.  God is patient with us when we grieve. Likewise, our patience and presence with our kids during their grief will help them learn to understand and navigate their feelings. Our patient presence with our kids communicates in a tangible way that God is present with them too.  God gives us safety and permission to mourn. As we mourn, we are then able to receive God’s comfort. Grieving in a healthy way Notice how this mom, who is a coaching client, helped her 9-year-old daughter (who does not like questions about her feelings!) to grieve in a healthy way: “They announced today that our schools will now be closed for the rest of the year. Blaire was SUPER upset and angry. She was slamming things on the table, giving me the evil eye and stating all the things she wouldn’t do. I was able to stay calm and remember that she needs me to not take it personally and stay safe.  She ran to a private spot.  A little while later I joined her and  gave her a piece of gum. I didn’t ask her questions, but just said ‘I know this stinks and isn’t what you want. I’m not excited about it either. But we will get through it together.’ Later at dinner I pulled out our feelings chart and we each went around and pointed at all of the feelings we felt today and why. AND Blaire actually did it!  It was such a great and logical way for us to talk about feelings in a non-threatening way.” Like this mom, we can give permission to our kids to say their hard feelings. We can safely communic

Are you “walking on eggshells” with restless, homebound kids? Do your kids have a case of “Grumpy Child Syndrome”? Your family may need an extra dose of a healthy sensory diet. What is a sensory diet? Why is it important? And how can you incorporate it in practical ways with your kids? Read on. (This article is also available as a video or audio download.) In the midst of stressful times, we may find ourselves encountering grumpy kids. (We may even admit to experiencing some grumpy feelings of our own!) There is nothing wrong with you or your kids. Just like our bodies need healthy food at the right times of the day so we don’t get “hangry,” we also need healthy, timely sensory experiences. Everyone’s body needs healthy movement to help improve mood! Feelings of grumpiness and restlessness in our kids could be signaling the need for a more balanced sensory diet. What is a sensory diet?  A sensory diet is the purposeful use of sensory and movement activities at key times of the day (along with quiet times strategically interspersed) to make it easier to naturally regulate energy and emotions. Big muscle play is especially important for a sensory diet. Why is a sensory diet important? When we’re upset, our brains trigger the release of fight or flight neurotransmitters to get us ready to “slug or run” in self-protection. The blood flows away from our frontal lobe and goes to our big muscles. If that body chemistry isn’t used for its intended purpose of big muscle action, it stays in a person’s system and creates an ongoing sense that something’s wrong. And, when a child’s nervous system is on edge, it doesn’t take much to trigger an aggressive or defensive reaction.  What’s the answer? Play! When placed in a tense situation, play-deprived rats were either aggressive or ran away to a corner. Remarkably, an hour of play a day offsets this tendency. There’s evidence this is also true for humans! Knowing this about rats, it’s no wonder why cooped-up kids are so irritable… Big muscle play uses up those fight/flight neurotransmitters and increases serotonin, the feel-good hormone that kids are often low on. Sensory activities can increase serotonin and improve mood! How does a sensory diet work? Just like we need good food at times of hunger, look for the typical times of day that kids might get edgy out of “sensory hunger.” Shortly before that time offer some sensory activities. Consider interspersing “recess” at scheduled times of the school work day, especially before tackling a difficult subject. Another typical “sensory hungry” time is late afternoon or right before dinner. Your child could use a hop ball to bring the napkins to the dinner table one at a time, an activity that has helped numerous kids sit better at dinner.  If you have kids that get riled up with big muscle play, a key to an effective sensory diet can be making sure activities are rhythmical and purposeful rather than wild and chaotic. Provide structure and repetition, using obstacle courses, bear walk or crab walk relays, music and movement activities, or bike rides if those are an option. Get creative with sensory materials at home One mom was struggling with her son and his math. She gave him the idea to slide down the stairs in a sleeping bag, climb back up and do it again. And again. Structured, repetitive climbing and bumping! He went from being testy and cranky, to happy and cooperative! This particular kind of movement had given his body and brain the sensory input it needed to be calm and focused for his schoolwork. One family recently got a trampoline* for the backyard to deal with the growing “cooped up” restlessness they were seeing. Jumping on the trampoline brought dramatic changes to one son’s behavior and outbursts. The mom declared, “My boy is back. He has been full of joy. All the angsty moments, arguments with siblings, and hiding in his room have stopped.” (She also told me she was loving the trampoline as well!) We can help our kids diminish their stress and increase their joy with the right kind of movement! Practical activities to help your restless kids The key to helping our kids become more regulated is to be encouraging and intentional in setting them up for regular sensory activities. It’s important to be inviting, not demanding, and join in the fun as much as possible. Whatever activity you choose to do, be sure to help kids write safety rules for all new equipment before using. There are many practical ways to incorporate a sensory diet:  Climbing. Hide things on opposite levels of the house and give clues to get kids to climb up and down the stairs. Or use a doorway swing hanger and attach a playset suspended ladder. Clip a bucket at the top, and put puzzle or Lego pieces in the bucket for kids to retrieve one at a time. Jump and crash. Put a mattress on the floor (maybe even store your child’s bed frame) and pile it wit

You are not a bad parent. Start learning how to stop parenting out of guilt or anxiety. This content is also available in an audio version.  When we’re in crisis, the voices built most deeply in us come out. Sometimes that can be positive. Other times it turns self-critical.  Instead of blaming ourselves, we can remind our hearts that we are created in God’s image to do good works. We can be vessels of God’s grace and presence to our families during this difficult time.  Look for the bright spots in your parenting As hard as it may be to see at times, there are bright spots in your parenting.  It’s almost never as bad it could be.  Let’s get a little deep for a moment: There is a distance between “as bad as it could be” and what is actually happening. The efforts you are making to bring God’s grace to your family are what is creating that distance. In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!  Focus on what you are doing well as a parent and allow God to grow those moments each day. Tips to grow your parenting without shame You can do better than mere survival during challenging times. You can even grow your parenting and come out better on the other side.  Here are some practical tips: Slow down, take deep breaths, trusting that Jesus is fully in control and that He never leaves us.Look at the opportunities. Look for “yes” moments that are now possible because of less time constraints.Look at the successes. Ask yourself, “When did I connect well with one of my kids?” or “When did I hold it together when I could have lost it and what helped me to achieve that?” In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!  One mom’s parenting success during “stay-at-home” orders Enjoy this story from Abby, mom of 3 from Minnesota, who has been working hard to connect well with her kids. She is learning to choose grace and be present with her kids in the midst of life’s daily messes: Now let me just tell you on Day 1… oh wow!  That day was HARD. I am an extreme extrovert.  I gotta see my people. And then there was the FEAR. Fear of the unknown.  Fear of the virus. Not being able to know, to plan, to execute our daily routine. That first day there were tears and screaming. The anxiety – not just mine but my kids’ – was thick and oppressive. But I had a change in mindset over the next 2-3 days. I realized that we are “all in this together,” and EVERYONE else was having a similar experience, so there was nothing I could do but truly surrender it all.  Everything that was most important to me was under one roof. So it turns out I did have my people.  And I still had a Jesus who I knew was walking alongside me in all of this, and I had the framework that Connected Families had given me.  I do struggle to stay calm but I read Jim’s post where he said, “Whenever I feel anxious I literally tell myself, ‘Jim, this isn’t helping. You can’t solve it. But you can breathe deep and remember that Jesus promised to never leave you nor forsake you. (Deep breath.) That’s it. Do it again.’” I did this.  You’re not a bad parent You are not alone. In your community, and the world as a whole, there are millions of parents walking through this together. Struggling does not make you a bad parent. Every family has unique challenges and trials to navigate and it can be exhausting. We see you. We hear you. And we want to walk alongside you. Share your prayer requests with us – we’d love to pray for you. Related Posts"Are We Gonna Be Okay?""God is Always Up to Something!" | Ep. 273 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicHelp Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31I Lost My Temper With My Child; Can I Make It Better?I Was a Critical Parent: 6 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving WaySometimes I Cry About My Parenting MistakesWhat To Do When Kids Interrupt Important Conference Calls | Ep. 33Why How YOU Were Parented Probably Won’t Work Anymore Prayer Lord, I ask you to fill me with an ability to see bright spots. To see past the difficulties, the failures, the discouragement. With your grace illuminate those bright spots so I can rejoice and see what you are doing right in our midst. I pray your blessing on our family today. In Jesus name, Amen. .stk-5jwinrs{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-5jwinrs-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-5jwinrs-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElemen

NOTE: This content is available as a video,  a blog post (below), or a 7-minute podcast. We trust this will serve every situation and learning style well. Here at Connected Families we realize this is a tough time for many in our community and in the world as a whole. In response to the current pandemic, we sent out a survey last week to hear, “What is it like to be you?” The response was overwhelming, with a thousand parents responding in just a little over a day. People shared a wide range of responses: About 15% of you said you are doing quite well, finding less stress, and deeper connection in the slower pace. Another 15% said that stress is about normal. Still, another 70% of you are feeling more stress than usual, some of you a LOT more than usual. We read through each of your responses, and what you told us you needed was practical encouragement in short, bite-sized chunks. So, today,  we want to share a word of encouragement with you – You are NOT alone in this! Jesus “GETS” you! Hebrews 4:15 & 16 says,“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”   It helps to have a little context to really take in this verse. Temptations often have more power under stress. And Jesus had more than His share of stress, some of which you may relate to right now:  He was so exhausted that He fell asleep, in a boat, in a storm.  He “managed” 12 disciples who often acted like selfish children.  He navigated a stressful religious and political climate.  He was primarily homeless during the 3 years of his ministry, and had no regular income.  So basically…. He gets us, because He has walked in our shoes! He knows how hard this is for many of you right now.  No matter what’s going on in your life right now, Jesus is with you and cares about you! Regardless of what the constant conflict, messy house, or undone checklist looks like. So how does knowing that “Jesus gets us!” help in a tangible way during this unprecedented situation, especially when you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed? Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations. What does this mean for me, right now? Here are a few practical ideas to help you keep things in perspective:  First of all, lower the expectations you have for yourself. Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations. Maybe you’re feeling pressure to make this a purposeful, connective time with your family. Or shine the light of Jesus to those around you. Or just get that to-do list done. Jesus exceeded expectations so you don’t have to meet your own!  Next, consider what expectations you have that might feel burdensome, and release yourself from those expectations!  Emphasize God’s mercy in the middle of the mess. Claim God’s abundant, overflowing mercy during your messiest, angriest moments. And say it out loud! During an angry power struggle with one of our kids, Lynne had a “Holy Spirit insight,” and said it out loud. “You know what I think God just said to me? …that He has so much mercy on us in our struggle! He knows how hard it is for you and I to get along. And He loves us.” They both experienced God’s merciful peace. So, in the middle of the craziness, take a breath and remember that God is with you, and say that out loud.   God has abundant mercy for us. God has abundant mercy and good purposes for us in all things. One of the most memorable sermons we’ve ever heard was the spontaneous testimony of a young man in a small, lively church. As this young man was asked by the pastor to share a word, and he stood up and said, “One thing I’ve learned is that God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!” He shared numerous examples, and after each one he joyfully repeated, “God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!”  During many difficult times in our life together we have consistently seen this truth remain. We know that God offers peace that passes understanding. And this peace has nothing to do with our circumstances. So ask yourself this:  In this very difficult time, what might God be up to in my family?  When it’s all over, what have I learned from this time?  Has my family benefited from a slower pace of life? Maybe what you’ll have learned is simply to lean into God’s very present mercy like you never have before. And what more valuable thing could any family learn?! We are journeying with you. Whatever your experience, we are journeying with you. While our children are grown and moved out, many on our staff have children of all ages and are navigating parenting challenges right alongs

When your kids misbehave, and you need to discipline them, have you considered what they are learning? Are they learning to submit to angry power? Or, perhaps, are they learning how to get better at hiding their misbehavior and sin? Guiding kids to right their wrongs is no easy task. Most families have one child that demands more of our parenting energy. Is that child hearing an unspoken (or spoken!) message that he/she is a “problem child”? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into the “Correct” level of our framework – teaching the message, “You are responsible for your actions.” With plenty of practical applications and helpful stories from other parents, this podcast is packed with ideas for guiding kids to right their wrongs. These ideas will equip you to lead your family with grace as you guide your children towards reconciliation skills they will utilize for a lifetime. In this podcast you’ll: be given creative alternatives to yelling, time-outs, and punishment, while still holding your children accountable.explore how guiding our children to reconcile in a healthy way when they are younger can have a positive impact on their relationships both now and in the future. learn a value system for correcting your child that does not just focus on correcting behavior. Mentioned in this podcast: Galatians 6:1 Galatians 6:7 Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.) Related PostsAvoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You ThinkDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14This Is Better Than My Old Consequences for a Disrespectful ChildWhat Is the Goal of Your Discipline?

What skills would you like your kids to have when they go out into the world? Should you drop what you’re doing to bring them something they forgot? How can you prepare your kids for conflicts they will certainly encounter in their relationships, family, and work environments later in life? What does it look like to mentor our kids? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, explore what it means to have a vision for your family and give practical ideas for ways to mentor your kids in skills, wisdom, and faith. In this podcast you’ll learn: parenting skills that build emotional intelligence.how thoughtful questions and natural impacts can build wisdom. ideas to model faith and humility so we nurture our kids’ faith in God’s grace and mercy. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)  Related Posts5 Ways to T.E.A.C.H. Your Kids ValuesAre You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15How to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESLeading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17Teach Your Kids How to Trust GodTwo Questions That Defuse Almost Any ConflictWhy Doesn’t Your Tween Want to Shower? We Don’t Know Either.

You may have heard, “Move TOWARD the struggling child.” This phrase might seem counter-intuitive. Often, when our child is struggling, the last thing we want to do is connect with them.  When we show love unconditionally, especially when our kids misbehave, they will then genuinely understand that our love cannot be earned. And that our love is not reserved exclusively for when they are obedient, helpful, or behaving in the way we want. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they discuss what it looks like to make sure our kids know we not only love them unconditionally, but enjoy them. In this podcast you’ll: be given quick, easy “fly-by” ideas for connecting with your kids.learn strategies to help kids understand you still love them, in the middle of misbehavior.receive scripts and words to use that show empathy.hear a story from a mom whose empathy helped her connect with her daughter and get below her daughter’s anger.  Mentioned in this podcast: Zephaniah 3:17 Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related Posts20 Beautiful Empathy Statements to Show Kids You Really See Them3 Unexpected Parenting Strategies to Help Your Highly Sensitive Child Thrive5 Powerful Ways to Connect with a Teen Who LiesConnecting with Toddlers & Teens During DisciplineDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15The Powerful Role of Empathy in DisciplineTwo Questions That Defuse Almost Any ConflictWHAT-EVER!! Ideas for Responding to Sass With Class We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)

We all want a peaceful home where kids feel safe. But sometimes safety is hard to attain, especially when life is stressful. How do we respond during hard parenting moments? How can we do better at walking in peace and joy with our kids? In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into creating a culture of safety at home. Applying what you learn as you listen can impact your family for generations to come. In this podcast you’ll learn to: look inward and ask the question, “What’s going on in ME?”.build a strong foundation for parenting, knowing who you are in Christ.show your kids, in a way they can understand, that you are a flawed human.communicate “You are safe with me,” in practical ways that can help your kids build a solid foundation on God’s grace and truth. Mentioned in this podcast: Blog post: Let Go of Shiny Grab Hold of GraceBlog post: How to Parent Together When You’re Total OppositesI Thessalonians 2 as a parenting chapter in the Bible Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related PostsDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Enjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44Fear-Based Compliance vs. Heartfelt Obedience: How to Avoid One & Inspire the OtherHow to Become an Emotionally Safe ParentThe Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceTo Spank or Not to Spank?What to Say When Your Child Makes Outrageous Statements | Ep. 37When Out-of-Control Kids Can’t Hear Your Gentle Voice We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.) 

How do you define yourself as a parent? Do you feel stuck in your parenting and want to explore a new way?  In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, are excited to introduce you to a structured framework for parenting that can help bring balance to your parenting. You CAN find balance between grace and consequences while teaching your kids wisdom, values, and faith. This podcast can bring balance to your parenting: learn the origins of the Connected Families Framework and how Jim and Lynne came up with the idea.be introduced to a structure you can use and follow in your parenting to better reach your child’s heart during the messes of daily life.be equipped with a model for restoration and grace to be used during discipline that will train your child to make right what they’ve made wrong.hear a personal story from our online course moderator, Stacy, who has learned to change the trajectory of relationships in her family by following the Connected Families Framework for parenting. Mentioned in the podcast: How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Do you feel like a visual reminder would help remind you of these four messages and principles in your parenting? We have just the thing. Check out our Connected Families Framework magnet and order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace during the messes of daily life. Order one today!

The most successful companies usually have clear cut goals and strategies to accomplish those goals. However, most families float through life haphazardly. When families get dangerously off track, parents often say, “I just don’t know how we got here.” A lack of intentionality is often implicated when families’ find themselves sinking or even shipwrecked. In this podcast, Jim Jackson and Chad Hayenga will challenge you to have a plan to move your family forward with purpose. In this podcast about family purpose you will:   Discover practical ways to keep this from happening to your familyBe inspired to instill a sense of purpose for your unique family to be a blessing in whatever ways God calls you, whether that’s in big* or lots of smaller ways Hear Chad’s story of the surprising impact of repeated discussions around a simple question his family would continually use to evaluate their goals Don’t miss these helpful ideas to guide your family away from shipwreck as you sail strongly toward God’s purposes. *In this podcast Jim mentions a story that Donald Miller shares about a wealthy dad “buying an orphanage” for his family. We recognize the verbiage used by the man in the story could be off-putting. We pray the story behind the words can challenge you to consider how your family might embrace a greater purpose to bless others. Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Related PostsHonoring Our Imperfect Dads | Ep. 19How Do I Get This Behavior to Stop?How to Speak Blessings Over Your Child This New YearLeading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17The Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceWhere Do Parenting Reflexes Come From? Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview. 

In this podcast, Chad Hayenga and Jim Jackson will challenge you to think through what you’re modeling as you parent. They’ll equip you with natural, effective ways to “live your life out loud” in a manner that builds faith and wisdom in your kids.  You’ll come away with: practical tips on how to make prayer natural with your kids.ideas on how to guide great dinner table conversations.simple ways to keep kids engaged when you read the Bible.  You may be intimidated by the idea of leading your kids to Jesus. The staff at church seems so much better equipped, right? But in your everyday life, you are teaching, leading, guiding and discipling in both the big moments, the small ones, and a million in between. Your kids are watching you all the time. The question is, what are they learning?  Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Related Posts5 Practical Tips to Pray BIG as a FamilyHow to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESSo You Killed The Cat….Now What?Struggling at the Family Dinner Table? How to Come Together & EnjoyTeach Your Kids How to Trust GodWhere Do Parenting Reflexes Come From? .stk-f6mbuiq{margin-bottom:0px !important}.stk-f6mbuiq-container{background-color:rgba(232,232,232,0.3) !important;box-shadow:0px 5px 30px -10px rgba(238,108,77,0.3) !important}.stk-f6mbuiq-container:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-5,#e8e8e8) !important} What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. (function() {var script = document.createElement('script'); script.src = "https://paperform.co/__embed.min.js"; document.body.appendChild(script); })()

If you’ve struggled in your relationship with one (or both!) of your parents, this podcast can give life-changing insight. Hurt and resentment left to brew under the surface can often perpetuate the effects of sin passing from one generation to another.  In this podcast, Jim shares his process of working through very difficult feelings and dynamics in his relationship with his dad. This enabled him to get to a place of an affectionate, grace-filled, restored relationship. As mentioned in this fall 2019 blog post, he learned to apply the Connected Families Framework with his own parents. In this podcast: You’ll learn practical ways to release bitterness, reconnect, and confront a parent about past hurts. You’ll be encouraged to replace bitterness with forgiveness, and disconnection with affection and honor. You’ll be equipped to set boundaries as needed.  As you learn to navigate your relationship with your earthly parents, you may even find your relationship with your heavenly Father growing deeper and more personal. In turn, this can permeate your own family for generations to come. Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox: Related PostsFamilies on Purpose | Ep. 21How Do I Get This Behavior to Stop?Leading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17When Doing My Best Isn’t Good Enough | Ep. 18Where Do Parenting Reflexes Come From?Why How YOU Were Parented Probably Won’t Work Anymore

In this podcast episode, Jim and Chad take a deeper dive into the dynamics of dads’ good intentions with their kids. If you sometimes feel like you’re doing your best and it’s just not good enough, be encouraged and equipped by the ideas in this practical podcast. In this podcast you’ll: listen as Jim shares some helpful insights from his own relationship with his dad. hear a roleplay illustrating typical default parenting and the messages kids may actually be receiving.be given examples demonstrating how to communicate messages of grace and truth to your kids in clear and practical ways. Whether you are a dad (or mom!) who’s raising toddlers, tweens, or teens these deep and heartfelt principles can help change the trajectory of your family for generations to come. We invite you to listen to the rest of this podcast series and be encouraged to lead your family with grace!  Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox: Related Posts11 Ideas to Help You Stop Yelling at Your KidsHonoring Our Imperfect Dads | Ep. 19How Do I Get This Behavior to Stop?Leading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17What Changed My Mind About DadWhy How YOU Were Parented Probably Won’t Work Anymore

Join Jim Jackson, Connected Families co-founder, and Chad Hayenga, LMFT, Certified Life Coach and parent coach, for this first episode in a 5-part series for dads. Moms, of course you’re welcome to listen! But Jim and Chad will be addressing specific issues unique to dads.   Often dads are working outside the home and that can bring unique challenges. It’s easy to carry stress from work into the pressure cooker of home. Dads frequently, not always, feel they need to use strong authority to manage conflict in the family. The messages dads want to convey are often not the ones that kids receive. This can build disconnection and resentment in family relationships, despite the best intentions. In this podcast you’ll: learn 4 principles for parenting in a way that builds connection and respect.hear a story about a dad who finally achieved a life-long goal with his kids when he began to focus on these principles.receive 4-5 key questions to guide your thinking for inevitable discipline situations. So whether you are a dad (or mom!) who’s raising toddlers, tweens, or teens these deep and heartfelt principles can help change the trajectory of your family for generations to come. We invite you to listen to the rest of this podcast series and be encouraged to lead your family with grace! Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Want to learn more? Jim recorded this 38-minute audio thinking about dads (although moms can listen too!). If your wife has recently been digging into our material and is urging you to “get on board!” this is a great place to start!  Related PostsDo You Have a Positive View of Your Child's Future?Families on Purpose | Ep. 21Honoring Our Imperfect Dads | Ep. 19How Do I Get This Behavior to Stop?Mentoring Our Kids in Skills, Wisdom and Faith | Ep. 25When Doing My Best Isn't Good Enough | Ep. 18

You’ve just had a family event and might still be recovering from the overt or passive-aggressive comments from extended family about your kids’ behavior and your parenting choices. Family gatherings can be HARD…especially if we sense that external pressure is shifting our parenting style to avoid criticism. On this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson tackle this tough and timely issue. In today’s episode you’ll learn: How to graciously talk to your parents (or other family members) about your parenting goalsHow to stay consistent and confident in your own parentingHow to prep your kids for success at family gatherings Listen in and be encouraged. You’ll be ready for any extended family gatherings (birthday parties, Christmas, Easter, reunions, etc.) as you make a commitment to stay consistent and confident in your own parenting. Want to dig deeper? Check out these helpful family gathering resources:  Read “3 Steps For Success in Holiday Chaos”.Read “What To Do When Relatives Criticize Your Parenting”.Read “Family Gatherings: Who’s In Charge” .If you have a child who struggles with sensory sensitivities, share “Viewing Your Child Through a Different Lens” with your family.Buy our Framework Magnet ($2!) to have handy as you explain your parenting goals.Encourage your parents, grandparents, or interested relatives to download and read, “4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.” Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox: Related Posts3 Unexpected Parenting Strategies to Help Your Highly Sensitive Child ThriveChristmas: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year?How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30How to Handle Unsolicited Parenting Advice from Family (4 Grace-Filled Tips)Loving the PARENT of Your RealityWhat Changed My Mind About Dad

In this podcast, Jim Jackson interviews Stacy Bellward, online course moderator, in a fun and heartfelt conversation. (Find out what even got Jim a little teary!) You’ll get the real scoop on the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, so you can know whether or not it’s a fit for you and your family. In this 15-minute podcast we explore: the history behind the Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course how Stacy went from being a student (2014), to moderating (2015), to project managing and producing the updated version (2018) what impact the DTC online course has had on families just like yours what is included in the registration fee and what some of the key takeaways are from the course One mom shared a realization as she began to walk in God’s grace for her parenting: “If I’m not defined by my past behavior then my kids aren’t either!” As God’s grace invades our messes, we learn that it’s who we are in Christ that defines us and empowers us to parent differently.  Don’t miss your opportunity to experience this life-changing course with hundreds of others from around the world! To learn more: Read through our Frequently Asked Questions about this online course. Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. (Offered two times a year; fall and winter. Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview Related PostsConnecting With Your Kids…Especially When They Struggle | Ep. 24Guiding Kids to Right Their Wrongs | Ep. 26Mentoring Our Kids in Skills, Wisdom and Faith | Ep. 25The Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceWalking in Peace and Joy with Your Kids | Ep. 23

Today, Stacy Bellward interviews Jim and Lynne Jackson as they dive deep into ways to correct kids’ misbehavior with the message, “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions”. Misbehavior is like the tip of the iceberg. If we make misbehavior our primary focus we miss guiding our children toward lasting change and growth. During this episode, all four parts of the Connected Families Framework are brought together.  “You are SAFE with me.” What’s going on with me? Can I exchange my inner angst for God’s grace and truth so my child feels safe? “You are LOVED no matter what.” Express unconditional love, which often brings a child to repentance. “You are CALLED & CAPABLE.” Coach my child toward wiser choices and better use of their gifts; solve the problem together. You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions.” Hold a child accountable to make right what they’ve made wrong. In this episode we talk through: teaching your kids what it means to make right what they’ve made wrong. the story of a young boy who hits his sibling and reconciles well. how parents might respond when a teen misses the bus.  Want to learn more? Download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs To Hear Read this article about cultivating respect in your child. Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. It is offered each year in the spring and fall. Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview. Related Posts4 Steps to Change Your Child’s BehaviorBeing Present with Our KidsGuiding Kids to Right Their Wrongs | Ep. 26Raising Entitled Kids? Here’s How to Stop.The Joy of Family Chores: A Tale of Two Moms

Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson to talk about a message that is essential for discipline situations: You are LOVED no matter what!  Why is this necessary? Don’t kids already know they are loved? During the frustration of misbehavior, kids can easily internalize a perception that their parents don’t like them. If we don’t intentionally communicate the message “You are LOVED no matter what” during challenges, kids will only become more discouraged. And if they believe they have to perform well to be loved, that can weave insecurity into the very fabric of their lives. In this podcast we discuss in-depth what it looks like to practically bring “love-no-matter-what” into daily discipline challenges. We explore the questions:   What can we do to prevent performance-based insecurity?  Start with a heart to sincerely connect with your child, not to manipulate them. Then offer the same kind of connection that is natural in your relationship in non-conflict situations – like touch, humor, or verbal affection. Doesn’t this let kids off the hook when they misbehave?  It actually helps keep them on the hook. Communicating love in the midst of misbehavior earns parents the respect needed to guide children to make right what they’ve made wrong. (See Romans 2:4)  What does “love-no-matter-what” look like in real life? In today’s podcast, Nichole, an adoptive mom with six kids, shares her story with strategies for connecting during misbehavior and the impact it’s had in her family. Want to learn more? Download the free Romans 8:38,39 adaption mentioned in the podcast. Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! Related PostsConnecting with Toddlers & Teens During DisciplineThis Is Better Than My Old Consequences for a Disrespectful ChildUnconditional Love: 15 Reasons to Show Love-No-Matter-What to Your KidsYour Child’s Misbehavior: A Cry for Help?

Being an emotionally safe parent is not about being soft or lenient. It’s also not suppressing our anxiety and frustration and trying to look calm when we discipline our kids. If we engage with a heart attitude of “What is wrong with you?!” our kids won’t feel safe with us.  The starting place for making your home a safe haven is to take an honest look at how you might be contributing to the conflict with your child.  When you engage with a heart of grace and a sense of purpose for the discipline situation, it’s much easier to help your child feel emotionally safe.  In this podcast, Stacy Bellward interviews Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families about the foundational principle in the Discipline that Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course: What does it mean to be an emotionally safe parent? You’ll hear an amazing story written by a parent who transformed  her relationship with her troubled child through the principle of emotional safety. This podcast and story hold lots of practical ideas you can apply today! If you don’t have time to listen, read our article Becoming An Emotionally Safe Parent.  Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode! To learn more about Connected Families framework for parenting download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear. Related Posts“I dealt with big behavior by trying to control it and shut it down.”3 Sure-Fire Discipline Tips for When the Heat is On!Fear-Based Compliance vs. Heartfelt Obedience: How to Avoid One & Inspire the OtherHow to Become an Emotionally Safe ParentTo Spank or Not to Spank?

We’re in back-to-school season, bringing all the joy and anxiety that comes with it. One question we hear when we talk with parents is, “What do I do when my child won’t get ready for school on time?” This week Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT and parent coach about how to respond in a kind, but firm, way to this high-stress time of day.  Short answer: The natural impact, without parental intervention, is what will be the greatest teacher.   Listen in as we explore a deeper dive into this frustrating issue:  Step 1 – IDENTIFY: Be clear in your expectations and ensure that your child has the ability to understand and clearly knows what to do to get out the door. Step 2 – EMPOWER: If kids are struggling, empower them to identify exactly what they may need from you to help them get going in the morning. Step 3 – TRANSFER: Try to avoid lecturing and nagging and implement your plan so you transfer the weight of responsibility to the child. One resource we recommend is our free eBook Consequences That Actually Work where you will learn about natural, logical, and restitution consequences. Want to learn more? Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for consistent encouragement in your parenting journey. Related PostsAre You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35Are Your Mornings Brutal?Avoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You Think