Calm it Down

How often have you ever thought "I'm probably the only one that thinks, acts, lives this way." As much as I want to talk about it with someone, anyone, I should just keep it to myself, smile, nod my head and wait to breakdown behind closed doors. It feels like we're carrying a heavy burden, but we don't want to tell anyone about it. We’re afraid that if we speak up, people will think we’re ‘not of sound mind’. So we keep quiet and carry on as best as we can. But the truth is, this shame is crippling us. It’s holding us back from living the life we want to live. And it’s time to break free from it. So how do we do that?

This is the first episode in a month-long series on mental health awareness. In May, which is mental health awareness month, we are talking about self harm and suicide. This episode has a tip on how to get through moments when all you can think about is leaving. There is something better than just finding an exit. I will show you how to find peace in the chaos and stay for the big show; ie life. Listen as we learn how to take things one moment at a time.

You know those times when you're worrying about something and then it turns out not to be a big deal after all? It's almost like the universe is trying to tell you something. Well, believe it or not, those moments can actually be blessings in disguise. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that it might be for the best. Thought it may not feel like it in the moment, looking back in hindsight it may have been the catalyst to where you are today.

Some nights you just lay there asking yourself "did I do the right thing today? Did I turn right when perhaps I should have turned left? The mind spinning the spiral of questions of should haves. But today, I'm going to share with you something that has guided from day one and will do so for the rest of life; your gut. That intuition, that inner voice giving you the road map one step at a time. Sometimes we doubt the turns and that's okay. Detours eventually get us where we need to be; when we're supposed to. Listen in as we pull out the compass of our intuition and follow our gut to where it takes us. And yes, sometimes that means following it to some chocolate chip cookies ;)

Wuv, Twue, Wuv. No, today’s episode isn’t about one of the greatest films ever made (The Princess Bride) but something I’m certain we’ve all experienced at least once in our life. Unrequited love. That ‘I like them but they haven’t even noticed I’m in the same room’ kinda thing. Chasing or loving someone that doesn’t share the same warm & fuzzies is hard. Brutally hard, emotionally. And while we’ve all been there before, it still feels like ‘you’re the only one’. Today, we talk about fishing (yup), our emotions and what to do when you toss the ball but it’s never caught, much less thrown back.

in 1932, theologian Reinhold Niebuhr inked one of the most recognizable aspirations of serenity ever written. So much so, it became ingrained in many 12 step programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous. What do these 27 words have to offer in helping us find our calm? Listen in as you may find yourself saying it when you need it most.

Dishes. The pile up, we ignore them. Or, we rush through them to just ....well....rush through them. Who would have ever thought a Vietnamese Monk would offer such introspective insight with a sink full of dirty dishes. And to be honest, after learning, I can honestly say my life hasn't been the same since. I have a feeling yours won't be either. Listen in as we find a quieting mind amongst the pots and pans.

What’s the first animal that comes to mind when I say “break through”? What animal literally kicks its way free in order to move into the next cycle of life which we gaze at bewilderedly in its beauty? No, this isn’t an episode about science or about rare species, but how a most beautiful animal has a story that will resonate with all of us.

Scars. Scars are hard. They’re a reminder of something we went through that we would rather forget. They can be a source of shame, or a source of strength. And no matter what they look like, or where they are, scars always have a story to tell. But the most interesting thing is 'how' our scars can not only empower us personally but be the hope in the lives of others.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but.....can you do it in-love? Today, we talk about a different kind of love. No, not tiger-mom, helicopter-parent love but Confrontational Love. Love when it doesn't necessarily 'feel' like love but it is. Would you rather someone cushion the words and not be honest or would you rather know the person you give yourself emotionally to is a bit 'too honest' but at least honest nonetheless. Listen in as we break down the two conversations of how love is spoken.

A question we rarely stop to think about. We wake up, brush our teeth, maybe have breakfast and before we know it we're on the treadmill of the day until we turn out the light at night. Do we ever stop to think about "where" does our happiness, our joy, those little perks in the day come from? Take a moment to listen in and pause. It's well worth taking the interest in as we find out where the well of happiness is hidden in our emotional valley.

If you can't explain it to a child, then how can you explain it even to yourself? Today, we embrace the reality of 'struggle' through the eyes and wisdom of The Velveteen Rabbit. Along with a sincere nod to Thich Nhat Hanh, let's understand how when you are truly present in every moment of life, you're truly in the midst of that; life.

Singer/songwriter Taylor Swift had a hit a few years ago called Shake it Off. In full transparency all I can remember of the song is the tag-line "shake it off" so I honestly have no idea WHAT the song is about BUT I reckon it to this episode about how, regardless we feel about it, life goes on. The show doesn't stop mid act and wait for us to recover/lick our wounds or even reflect. As you'll see in one of my most embarrassing moments in my professional career, The Show literally Goes On. Tune in to learn how sometimes we just have to laugh at ourselves and take the words of wisdom from Ms. Swift to simply shake it off.

I can't help but to hear McCartney's voice with the opening lyrics of Let it Be but hearing anything from the Beatles is never a bad thing. But life, obviously, has its storms and while McCartney's voice is top-shelf, sometimes we need a little more to carry us through life's ups and downs. Today, we find out w-h-a-t that thing or things may be to help us In Times of Struggle. Listen in.

It’s a world of noise, of ups and downs, of shiny things in one direction and something flashy in another. How in the world are you supposed to ‘calm the mind’ with everything around you set to 11!? You’ve heard the word meditation, you’ve heard there’s this secret way of de-stressing and finding a state of peace but you haven’t a clue where to begin. Well, here is your chance. Today, we crack open the Meditation 101 book and dive in. It’s easier than you think to exist in a state of less stress and more happy. Listen in. You won’t be disappointed.

Who would've thought we would learn so much from Pink Floyd's 1979 album, The Wall. As life happens, we get the various bumps, setbacks and punches below the belt. All of these and more lead to us "protecting ourselves" but what if it's that 'protection' that's hindering us from being our full potential? This wall, this shield we build around ourselves may not be what we think it is. Listen in as we break down the ideas behind 'The Wall' in our hopes to no longer be Comfortably Numb.

I had SUCH an overwhelming response to the first episode of 2022 "Resolve to Love Yourself". Thank you. So, we pick up from our 'ditching New Years Resolutions' as I check in to see how you're doing AND I offer a few thoughts in continuing the conversation of Loving Ourselves; which even that can be a bit stressful in the process. Listen in as we continue this journey of looking deeper into ourselves.

This episode comes from a listeners request and I LOVE the honesty in their asking. "What do you do when you HAVE to be around someone you just don't want to be around?" Great question. Let's face it, sometimes it's just difficult to get along with everyone! BUT, there are some things we can consider and possibly help in this "everyone be friends" landscape. Listen in as we learn a perspective we often let slide.

We’re tired. We’re all exhausted. With everything we’ve been handed the last 2 years and the ‘who knows what’s around the corner’, personally, I’m spent. As you probably are as well. Emotionally, physically, spiritually, just tired. So the idea of adding another thing to our plate this year is one that I'm going to pass on this year. Instead, I'm slowing the role and doing this one thing and this one thing only. Listen in as to why.

We pick up from last week's episode Understanding You - Currency, Part 1 as we turn our focus now to someone else; Understanding Someone Else - Currency Part 2. After hearing this episode, I hope you are inspired with a new perspective in being able to connect with someone besides yourself. Be it your spouse, your sibling, even a stranger. Listen in as I share a few key secrets in building relationships that will forever stay with you.

I'm reminded, oddly, of the scene in The Notebook where Noah keeps asking "what do you want!?" to Allie as she keeps replying "it's not that simple!" But how many times have you stopped and asked YOURSELF the same question. What do you want? What do you need just for yourself? How can you expect others to understand you if you have yet to learn it out yourself? Listen in as we explore some incredibly simple ideas in how to know what you need just a little bit more of.

I can say with a pretty good amount of certainty that the person you are today has a lot to do with the people around you. From toddler to teenager we absorb our surroundings, those we've followed since knee high, our influences. Some good, some could be better but in the end, your own uniqueness is that of your own pursuance of personal identity. Dive in as I share some thoughts on being uniquely the person you were always meant to be; you.

Grief. Even the word bears a heaviness like no other. We've all had a loss in some way or form. But perhaps there's a different way of looking at the word 'grief'. Because in order to grieve, you actually need something first. And that something may not be what you thought it would be.

What is your favorite picture? The one at your desk or hanging on a wall that always seems turn any day of rain into sun. While that picture is your emotional go to, what if I told you there's more pictures waiting to be made. But sometimes it's easier to live in yesteryear than in the moment at hand. Listen in to this episode of Calm it Down podcast where I share some thoughts about what really makes the perfect picture.

Imagine one day you’re going through your grandmother’s attic. Shifting through the boxes passed down for generations, you come upon a hand written letter by Albert Einstein. “My dear”, it states, “had I only known earlier the secret to thinking with such clarity and vigor, I would have seen e+mc2 much sooner!” Your heart races as you read further and further “where is it!?”, you ask yourself. “Where is the secret!?” If you knew the step Einstein developed for such intelligibility would you do it? Even if it seemed ‘silly’? But what if Einstein wasn’t the only one that practiced this ‘foolishness’. What if this practice was a daily habit of Aristotle, Salvador Dali, Eleanor Roosevelt, Thomas Edison, Leonardo da Vinci, Margaret Thatcher and even Winston Churchill. What did these world shaping minds have in common in changing the world? Listen in. It’s a lot more “I can do that!” then you would think.

Wanna be creative? Want to be the smartest person in the room? Want to know how so many people have the best ideas? Well, I'm going to share one of the most effective tools used by some of the most creative minds to have ever walked this earth. And, it only takes 10 minutes. Stepping away from the screen and moving outside not only circulates your blood flow but is like an open fountain for your brain as it then whispers secrets to your subconscious. “Where did that idea come from?!”, you say to yourself. “I’ve been sitting at my desk for 8 hours straight trying to figure this out!”, you say. “Guess I just got lucky.” No, you just got some air. Lace up your sneaks as I talk you for a guided stroll. Your mind will thank you. Trust me.

Everyone should know the warning signs when our bodies are telling us we're under too much stress but what to do about it is rarely taught. Which means it’s usually swept under the rug and never mentioned. Why is that? We know how to cook 3-4 meals, make 2-3 cocktails even but when it comes to stress or anxiety we panic, completely shut down and just hope it never comes back....but it always does. Today, you're going to learn 2 very important life-lessons to pull out when the stress is pulling you down. Listen in, it's easier than you thought and more powerful than you'd ever imagined.

Great. Everything is….great, supposedly. The pressure to look great, to feel great, to post something great but what if I just don't feel great. What if at my core I’m just sad. A study from 2017 stated an estimated 17.3 million adults in the United States had at least one major depressive episode. That was 2017. WAY before we pulled out the KN95s. This episode I’m going to share three reasons why feeling sad perhaps isn’t so bad after all; for a season.

Aaahhhh, Summer. The sun, the surf, the sandcastles. It’s finally here. Blanket? Check. Shades? Check. Sunscreen? Don’t forget the sunscreen! Can’t forget the sunscreen. A day of bliss can turn into a week of burns! Before running for the waves take a sec to ready yourself; both physically and emotionally. Just as you take the time to apply the SPF 9 million this summer, remind yourself the importance of your emotional sunscreen as well. Giving yourself space, ‘coverage’ if you will. Volleyball and bonfires are great but so are quiet walks looking for seashells. This episode, Summer, Shades & Sunscreen, I share how to keep from getting the emotional sunburn by taking just a few simple steps you may have overlooked with the sun being so bright.

Today's episode is bitter sweet. Bitter in the sense that it's the final episode of Season One but sweet in looking back to see all that we've come through. And don't worry, Season Two will return in September. But before you apply the SPF6700 to your nose and snorkle up, I have one tiny favor to ask before you embark the golden days of Summer. Listen in as you and I make a pact agreement with each other before we come back in September.

What next? Restrictions lifted almost daily as guidances continue to lend a hand towards the world reopening. It’s the hour we’ve all been waiting for. “Getting back to normal” we’ve been saying since March of last year. But suddenly we’re asking ourselves…am I ready? I just settled in. What if I don’t want to go outside, be social, shake hands or even just hug…… As we were a year ago, we find ourselves in the same position today; new waters. And just because everyone is ready to jump in the pool that doesn’t mean you have to join them this second. Listen in as I share my thoughts about easing in into life post-Covid 19.

Continuing the month of May as Mental Health Awareness Month, we break down the two types of anxiety and how to work through them. Join me as we bring this conversation to the greater public, acknowledging the importance of sharing our stories as we each come to know "we're not alone".

"Sssshhhh!!! Don't talk about it. Nobody wants to hear it.", they say. "But, who's they? And why can't I talk about it?", you ask. May is Mental Health Awareness Month in the United States so over the next 4 weeks Calm it Down Podcast will be bringing the conversations from the hushed hallways to the dinner tables. It's time we talk about Mental Health as the illness that it is AND how it can be helped.

I can probably sum up one of your worst experiences in 2 words; summer camp. There's no skirting the teenage years without at least one encounter of sweat, blistering heat and obstacle courses. And while the memories will forever live in my head, it wasn't until recently I learned a lesson from one and it came from the most unsuspected place. Listen in as we learn a different approach to what forgiveness is really all about.

"I'm worthless.", said the fish. "I can't even climb a tree. The squirrel can. Look at him." We're each uniquely, and beautifully, different. And while we each have traits/talents that are ours, what happens when we strip those 'things' away. Who are we at our core? Listen in as we learn the importance of Self Worth.

A reckless driver cuts you off without a ‘sorry wave’, you’re finally next in line and they just sold out, my kids won’t let me even finish a sentence. AARRGGHH!!! What gives with why I’m so angry!? But, honest question. Is it really anger that’s kicking up all the dust? I’m gonna suggest a different angle in how we look at anger.

Stress. Big stress, little stress, it's all the same. Anxiety, fret, worry, we can wrap it in numerous boxes but in the end, stress is .....well, stress. But WHERE does it come from?! Why do we stress? Who or what says 'you know, you really need a good dose of stress right about now."? No one! At least no one you know, I hope. Listen in as we uproot this most troublesome tree we nurture without any justified reason.

How often have you looked in a mirror and said “is that really me?” Not often, I would imagine. Usually we recognize ourselves, at least I hope. But, mirrors are a reflection of what’s outside, not inside; our emotions, our thoughts, our feelings can shift in varying degrees but taking the time to ask yourself “how do I look...inside?”, is a question we rarely ask ourselves. Listen in as we ask the question ever since Disney's Queen found out about a young girl named Snow White.

Why are you here? What’s left in life? What’s your purpose? My word so much pressure in finding our p-u-r-p-o-s-e. So much so there’s even such a thing as Purpose Anxiety (no, seriously). Take a breather from the rollercoaster and listen in as we talk about a different approach to the life you ‘should be’ living.

Change. We change. Our activities, our elements, even our shoes change. I mean, if you’re still wearing your shoes from 5th grade, I hand it to you. But honestly, dealing with change is simpler than you my realize. In this episode, I show you 3 simple steps to putting the anxiety of the unknowns to rest. The first one may just surprise you.

Drivers license, check. Graduation, check. College (if that’s your thing) check, career, pets, family, kids, grandkids you have an endless array of boxes to choose from if you so desire. Our attention is so often dialed in on the preconceived 'happened' that we miss the happening all together. But today I propose that maybe while we're waiting for those milestones in life to happen, we're missing what's really happening while we're waiting.

The biggest hit song of 2021, Drivers License, is the coming-of-age heart cry that’s been recorded like so many others long before the microphone was invented. Guy meets girl, girl falls in love, guy falls in love….with someone else; leaving said girl feeling of no worth when all said and done. And while Drivers License IS a great “I got dumped” breakup song, Olivia Rodrigo leaves a trail of breadcrumbs pointing back to something more important than a lover’s quarrel; insecurity. Hop in as we drive down Emotional Highway 101 and learn the most important key you’ll ever learn when it comes to matters of the heart. But I’m not gonna tell you here. You’ll just have to listen.

What’s the worst that could happen? And why is it that’s generally the first thing we think about; the worst possible scenario! Listen in as we learn how to stop thinking the worst, or in technical terms, catastrophizing.

Every now and then we need just a little push. Be it a first step or crossing the finish line, sometimes we just run out of steam. Today, in celebrating the 25th episode, we fill our minds and hearts with words of wisdom from some of the most revered individuals to have walked the same steps you’re probably taking today. Listen in as we reflect where we are from 25 weeks ago and take some words of encouragement as we look towards the next 25 weeks ahead.

Depression has many currents and undertows throughout this ocean of life. And while it often feels like you’re surrounded by sharks and drowning, you don’t have to tread the waters alone. Listen in as we discover two vital steps in swimming safely to shore as we close out this three-part series on Depression. You’re not alone. You’re never alone.

This week, we hop over to Japan to learn of the beauty and significance of the Cherry Blossom within the Japanese culture. Sakuras, as they’re known, are stunning to gaze upon but their meaning takes a much deeper root in how we may view life individually. Listen in to part 2 of this series on Depression as we continue bringing this conversation to the coffee tables; casting awareness to the clouds we let linger far too long overhead.

Sure, sure, you’ve heard the Rolling Stones’ “You Can't Always Get What You Want”?, since you were knee-high but do you KNOW the story behind it!? Who would have thought we would tackle the subject of depression with Mick Jagger as our inspiration?! Join me as we start a 3 part series breaking down what depression really is and what we can do about it. Listen in as you may “just get what you need.” (Sorry, couldn’t resist!)

What’s Your Problem!? No, seriously. What is your problem? And let's be honest. Is it really a problem? After years of my asking countless couples “what has kept you together after so many years?”, one couple celebrating their 50th anniversary dropped the most unexpected words of wisdom that I did NOT see coming. Listen in as we not only learn ‘what IS our problem, but what to do about it.’

Think about a day last week. Any day. What was your favorite day from last week? During the noise and the chaos of those seven days was there a moment that made you pause and smile? A bike ride or your favorite ice cream. Maybe something more significant like having a child or finally hitting that career achievement. Our days are so intense, so consuming we’re exhausted before we put our feet on the floor each morning. It’s understandable all we see before us every morning are obstacles and set-backs. But when we make a habit to reflect on the things to be thankful for, to bring to mind those experiences both now and in the past, from the people who love you, to the roof over your head and the food on your table, you will come to see it’s a pretty long list of moments that truly matter.

Habits. Patterns. Behaviors we’ve put in place purposefully or not. At the start of the new year we kid ourselves with our bravado of new ambitions. But in reality, our zeal usually lasts no longer than a cup of coffee. Not because we’re insincere in our passionate pursuits, we just don’t know how to break the bad and make the good. Until today. Join me in today’s Episode, Breaking Bad - Breaking the Spell of Habits, as we reframe resolutions into forever rituals.