Advice Fight

In a move that's clearly just a ploy to boost ratings, Ben and Andrew decide to throw a surprise Zoom baby shower for Adam. And by "baby shower" we mean sprinkle. And by "sprinkle" we mean diaper sculpture contest. Special guest Shayna Ferm joins to offer wisdom and judgement, Producer Ron gets dragged into the sculpting competition, and Adam joins in the second half to display the freakish and fantastical creations that he discovered on his front porch. Featuring comedy clips from Shayna at The Pump & Dump Show and our own Adam Cayton-Holland! Congrats to Jef Lightfoot, winner of our giveaway from last episode—Jef and his wife will receive introductory rock climbing lessons! LINKS: Check out Band of Mothers Learn more about The Pump & Dump Show Get tickets to see the Grawlix LIVE in Denver on June 26th! The Grawlix on Twitter and Instagram Visit our Patreon page to see photos of the sculptures (free for everyone!) and an uncut video of the Zoom sprinkle (Patreon exclusive) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ben, Adam, and Andrew reunite in person for the first time in months—to test their grip strength and their trust in one another—by going indoor rock climbing. Will the the bonds of the boys' friendship become stronger when they're literally tied to opposite ends of the same rope? Will one of them fall to their tragic-but-hilarious death while a crowd of strangers watches? Listen and find out! Featuring standup comedy clips from Denver's Anthony Crawford and our own Andrew Orvedahl! LINKS: The Grawlix on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook Visit our Patreon page, where you can see photos/video from this challenge and enter to win a pair of Introductory Rope Climbing classes at Earth Treks! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Adam once considered himself fluent in Spanish. Ben and Andrew, not at all. But that doesn't mean all three of our intrepid Grawlix heroes can't use a week-long refresher course on the second most commonly spoken language in the US. Join them on un viaje hispanohablante! Featuring a thirteen-year-old standup clip from the well-traveled travieso Adam Cayton-Holland and a much more recent clip from Denver darling Christie Buchele! LINKS: The Spanish learning app that Ben used for this challenge Duolingo, Andrew's app of choice The Grawlix on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook Visit our Patreon page, where we've posted a video with literal English translations of our Spanish conversations! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Setting out to answer that age-old question, "does weed make you more creative?" Andrew, Adam and Ben celebrate that oh-so-Colorado holiday of 4/20 by saxing a few daggers and then taking creativity tests administered by Producer Ron. The results are very, very stupid. Featuring standup clips from Steve Vanderploeg and Eeland Stribling! LINKS: The Grawlix on Twitter and Instagram Visit our Patreon page Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

That's right! It's another brand-spanking new episode of Boi Crazy, and inarguably our most batshit episode to date! This time, we rank the hunkiness of US presidential assassins—and yes, we included an attempted assassin as well. Duh. Enjoy this free mini episode and then join our Patreon, where you can listen to the full episode—or watch the uncut video of this episode recording, complete with photos of the 'hunks,' so you can judge along with the boys! Hurry, before we all get put on an FBI list! And never fear, we're back next Tuesday with a brand-new Grawlix Saves the World episode, just in time for 4/20! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ben, Andrew, and Adam are joined by their buddy Ian Karmel to see if their bowel movements can be improved by the use of a simple yet sophisticated, molded piece of highly functional plastic—the Squatty Potty. Grawlix Note: We're not being paid by Squatty Potty for this endorsement. Yet. Also featuring standup clips from Ian—hot damn, that's a lot of Karmel! LINKS: Ian on Twitter and Instagram Ian's podcast, All Fantasy Everything The Grawlix on Twitter and Instagram Visit our Patreon page Talk to us LIVE on the Stereo app Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We've all got moments we're not proud of. Times we were dicks. Times we were completely wrong in our thinking. Times when we were...too drunk. And sometimes it helps to talk about those moments, and apologize for them. Because, undoubtedly, if more people apologized when they were in the wrong, the world would be a much, much better place. Allow us to get the ball rolling. Featuring standup clips from Dave Ross and Ryan de la Garza! Find bonus videos, clips, and merch on our Patreon page! Talk to us live on the Stereo app! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Remember our first episode? The one where we swore off social media for a week? Well forget all that. For this episode, we throw our respective hats into the TikTok ring to see if as comics we should be embracing new-fangled forms of expression and self-promotion. And we invite none-other-than hilarious comic and TikTokker extraordinaire Steph Tolev to show us the ropes and judge our efforts! LINKS: Steph on TikTok Steph's website—buy her album! Adam's TikTok videos Andrew's TikTok videos Ben's TikTok videos Visit our Patreon page Talk to us LIVE on the Stereo app Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Boi Crazy is BACK and this one's a real hunk-doozy—we're earnestly appraising the hunks of Saved By The Bell! Enjoy this free taste and listen to the the entire episode (with video!) by joining our Patreon at patreon.com/grawlixsaves And never fear, we'll be back next Tuesday with a brand-new episode of The Grawlix Saves the World! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a very special LIVE episode from Number 38 in Denver, Colorado, the boys welcome Shane Torres to get their bromance on and write valentines to one another. Special guest Eliza Skinner does a standup set and helps us judge our results! Click here to see photos from this live show and a video of Tim's marriage proposal on Patreon! Click here for Andrew's new stray-animal RPG called STREETS! Click here for tickets to Adam's shows at Comedy Works South! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In what is surely a podcast first, three standup comics vow to be better listeners rather than just wait for their turn to talk. Andrew and Adam put into practice helpful listening tips while Ben takes a vow of silence for an entire week, resulting in a palpable dip in global jiu-jitsu chatter. Featuring standup comedy clips from Troy Walker and Emily Maya Mills! Here's a link to that NYT Smarter Living article! Here's a link to tickets for our live show on February 10th! Here's a link to our Patreon, where you can find exclusive bonus goodies, merch and more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Look there's just no beating around the bush: The Grawlix are a bunch of fucking uggos. We're just butt. And the pandemic ain't helping. So we decided to take a week to practice some proper facial skin care—and we reached out to Arbonne Regional Sales Champion Kyle Kinane for help. Featuring standup clips from Kyle and Charla Lauriston! Wanna see the before-and-after photos from this episode? We've unlocked them for everyone on Patreon: https://patreon.com/grawlixsaves Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Starting the year off right, Adam, Andrew, and Ben decide to chuck their pesky free will out the window and let the universe tell them how to live—specifically by putting into action whatever vagaries their daily horoscopes have in store for them. Spoiler alert: We all buy Bitcoin! Featuring standup comedy from Kevin O'Brien and our own Ben Roy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a move that is just so Andrew, he picks the movie, "Top Gun," for his first time at the Boi Crazy wheel. "But Andrew," we said. "They are men, not teen hunks." "Yes," Andrew responded. "But they helped turn us from Bois into men." And there's just no arguing with that. The rest is Boi Crazy history. Enjoy this free taste, and listen to the the entire episode (with video!) by joining our Patreon at patreon.com/grawlixsaves And never fear, we'll be back next Tuesday with a brand-new episode of The Grawlix Saves the World! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Typically the Grawlix GloboCorp company holiday party is a fête for the ages! We break into one of those storage PODS and smoke cigarettes until we all get headaches, just like in the bible! This year pandemic restrictions have us homebound, so we celebrate the only way we can—with secret present drops for one another in the dead of night, and barely restrained passive aggression. And we invite producer Ron in on the fun! A Christmas miracle! Featuring standup clips from Mara Wiles and our own Andrew Orvedahl! Coming next week on Patreon: Video of the party! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Remember Tamagotchis? Those egg-like keychains that were actually little digital lives that you had to take care of? The ones that were so popular in the 1990s? The ones that shit and eat and need medicine and stimulation and discipline? The boys sure do! The boys and special guest Maria Thayer (Those Who Can't, Strangers With Candy, Forgetting Sarah Marshall), just spent a week raising them! What fun! Beeping, kitschy, insufferable fun! Featuring standup clips from Noah Gardenswartz (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel) and Nikki Glaser (Not Safe, Nikki & Sara Live)! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's Thanksgiving time at The Grawlix Saves the World—and we suppose everywhere else too—and what we're most grateful for is our fans. Specifically those who support us on Patreon. The rest of you are great, but let's get real: money talks. So, to show our gratitude, Ben, Adam, and Andrew each take on separate challenges suggested by our Patreon subscribers! Featuring standup comedy clips from Kyle Kinane and the Puterbaugh Sisters! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Huzzah! The episode America has been clamoring for! After exploring Ben's love of jiu-jitsu and Andrew's love of Dungeons & Dragons, Adam finally gets his day in the sun, as he shares his passion for bird-watching with his cohorts. Is the world better off for it? Um, doy-hickey. Of course it is. And as if that's not enough, this episode features the return of the Whapping Spatula! And standup comedy clips from resident bird nerd Adam Cayton-Holland and the splendid Eliza Skinner! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

With one week—ONE WEEK—left until the presidential election, Andrew, Adam and Ben hash it out and then decide to do something politically proactive every day for a week. Will the Grawlix actually maybe save the world this week?! Only November 3rd will tell! Or a protracted legal dispute thereafter. USA! USA! Featuring standup clips from Nolawee Menghist and our own sweet baby Ben Roy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It was Gandhi who said, "If you hate something, try it, and maybe your attitude will change." And even though we just invented that quote for Gandhi, it feels right in his wheelhouse. All this to say, Andrew, Adam and Ben put aside their hatred of e-scooters and try living as the Vape-Bro half lives, in a free-for-all scooter race through the streets of downtown Denver. It's all very, very stupid. Featuring standup comedy clips from Colorado's own Eeland Stribling and a deep cut from friend-of-the-pod Ian Karmel! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Behold, our first live, in-person podcast ever! Shout out to the good folks at Ratio Beerworks for helping us put this on safely and for just generally ruling. And to Erin Rollman and Brian Colonna from Buntport Theater for moderating the challenge like champs. See who among Adam, Andrew and Ben is the best—okay, least worst—speller of the Grawlix! Note: This is an edited version of the live show. Wanna hear the whole enchilada, including a dating update from Andrew and stories from Adam and Ben? Check our Patreon page this Friday! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Spurned on by Ben, who only eats food out of some proletariat obligation to be a more efficient laborer, Andrew and Adam attempt to cut sugar, starch, grains, joy, pleasure, and the will to live out of their diets for an entire week—a real Whole7 challenge! The results: the most contentious, heated episode yet! You don't fuck with another man's diet. Featuring standup comedy clips from Sarah Benson and Troy Walker! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The podcast within a podcast is BACK. Here's a taste of this Patreon exclusive! Want the full Boston cream pie? Go to patreon.com/grawlixsaves Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is meditation just a trick pulled by creepy, crystal-worshiping aging hippies to skeeze on college Buddhist chicks? Or is it actually a way to set your mind at ease and channel some inner peace? The boys try it every day for a week to find out. Featuring standup clips from the eternally amazing Emily Heller (this one's a specially selected deep cut) and our sweet boy Benjamin Roy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you love someone, let them go. If you love something, grow up. It's an inanimate object. Life is about experiences, not things. Stop keeping so much shit in your house. In this episode, Andrew, Adam, and Ben purge one item per day for a week straight—which explains that recent flood of Those Who Can't merch at Denver-area Goodwill stores. Featuring standup from Denver's darlings Christie Buchele and Aaron Urist! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In an effort to understand one another from the inside out—but not in a disgusting way—Andrew, Adam, and Ben take personality tests to find out once and for all whether they're assholes or just wired a certain way. Spoiler alert: It's both! Featuring standup clips from Phoebe Bottoms and Chris Charpentier. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Continuing the trend of walking a mile in one another's discount Keds sneakers, Andrew challenges Ben and Adam to play a spirited game of D&D—AND NOT MAKE FUN OF IT. Join our intrepid trio as they saunter about a mystical realm armed with only their wits! And a bunch of badass medieval weapons. Featuring standup clips from Patrick Richardson and Steph Tolev! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Realizing that they may be too high and mighty when it comes to their reading pursuits, the boys decide to read Twilight, a wildly popular book that they would typically sneer at. The results are exactly what you expect—Ben, Adam and Andrew each fall for separate hunky vampires and run away with them into the woods. The podcast is now over. It's the ending we all saw coming. Featuring standup clips by our own sweet baby Andrew Orvedahl and Denver's Lily Ostberg. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In an attempt to get in touch with their inner selves, the boys decide to give sensory-deprivation salt tanks a go. No light. No sound. Just afloat in 200 gallons of salt water and with nothing but their own thoughts to keep them company. Will they discover deep truths? Will they go crazy? Will they convince a posh float studio to let them do it for free? Look inward. The answers await. Featuring standup clips from Hayden Kristal and our own Ben Roy! A very special thanks to VIVE Float Studio for having us. Get your float on at their locations in Denver, Frisco, and Chicago! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bored with the utter mundanity of mail, the boys try to spice up the daily ritual of visiting the mailbox for one very lucky friend: Rory Scovel! AKA Principal Quinn from Those Who Can't! AKA Robbie from the new Comedy Central show "Robbie!" AKA the co-host of the Starburns podcast Pen Pals with Daniel & Rory! Listen in as Rory crowns a winner and settles once and for all who is the best at the lost art of correspondence. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever wanted to really get into the brains of Andrew, Adam, and Ben? Really delve into those respective subconsciouses and see what makes the fellers tick? Of course you haven't. It's a hellscape in there—a swirling Hieronymus Bosch painting of dick jokes and insecurity. Which on second thought actually sounds pretty cool. Join the boys as they take you through their dream journals. Featuring standup clips from Dan Soder and Katie Bowman. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys decide to sweat buckets on everybody near them in a hot yoga class. Ben, Adam, and Andrew are no strangers to exercise. We need not tell you this. You see them coming down the block, take in those Grawlix-boy physiques, lower your shades and are all like, "Damn, girl. Damn." But hot yoga is something else entirely. It's yoga. At a 105 degrees. And it's so damn hard. So the boys decide to see if they have what it takes. First person to leave the class sobbing loses. LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Behold, the first ever live Grawlix Saves the World! Live online anyway, via Twitch, from our individual homes. In quarantine. Nonetheless, huzzah! Ben, Adam and Andrew are joined by their dear old friend Kristin Rand, who reads the boys' tarot cards and gives them all a new, welcome perspective in these strange times. Thanks to our pals at Hold The Phone Comedy for hosting this event. Click here if you'd like to see the video of this live stream or check our show notes on thegrawlix.com! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys binge watch every single movie in the Fast & the Furious franchise. In a VERY SPECIAL AND IMPORTANT episode of "The Grawlix Saves the World," the boys decide they should fill some holes in their pop cultural canon. When Ben and Adam discover that neither of them has seen "The Fast & the Furious" movies, they vow to watch every single one, fastly and furiously, binge-indoctrinating themselves into the Fast and the Furious Universe, heretofore known throughout the land as the F&FU. For his part, Andrew has to watch "Jerry Maguire." That's it. One stinking movie. While Ben and Adam watch nine. NINE! No one ever said The Grawlix Saves the World was fair. FAMILY! Featuring standup comedy clips from Shanna Christmas and Steve Vanderploeg! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Listen to our live episode of Boi Crazy where we ranked the hunks of the FNFU! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys get thankful. Sometimes it seems as if the world is trying to sucker-punch you in the gut, call you fat, and then take your wallet and go buy a bunch of scratch tickets. Okay, a lot of the time. Which is why it's so important to remember the little things—the things that make you happy, make you smile, or make you curious— the things that make you grateful. The fellas vow to keep track of such things for a week and then get together to share their gratitoodies. Featuring standup comedy clips from Sam Tallent and Steph Tolev! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ben teaches Andrew and Adam jiu-jitsu, then they beat the shit out of each other. Ben opens up about his passion for jiu-jitsu, then takes Adam and Andrew to the Easton Training Center—where Ben works as an instructor—and coaches the boys on a few fundamentals. To demonstrate their newfound martial art, Adam and Andrew do battle like only a couple of dads pushing forty can. Did all the jiu-jitsu experts training at the center watch Adam and Andrew ineptly throw blows and laugh their asses off? Tune in and see! Featuring standup comedy clips from Casey James Salengo and David Gborie! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Behold: Boi Crazy. This tossed aside idea by the geniuses behind the podcast "The Grawlix Saves the World" has finally come to life—for as many episodes as it takes until we get restraining orders. In episode one, we start with a first ballot hall-of-famer teen hearthrob, Jonathan Taylor Thomas. It's three forty-something dads rating the hunkiness of teenage boys. What's weird about that? There's nothing weird about it. You're being weird. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys take a look at their sleep habits. It was Arianna Huffington who once famously said, "Sleep better you fucking idiot." In this episode, the boys do just that. Or try to anyway. After revealing that he hasn't been sleeping well because of late-night video games sessions—you know, like a child—Andrew attempts to dramatically improve his sleeping habits. Ben decides to forego naps for a week, while Adam decides to add them. Featuring standup comedy clips from Mo Alexander and Ester Steinberg! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys attempt to speak more intelligently. The pressure is on as Ben, Adam, and Andrew attempt to share stories of adolescent heartbreak without saying the words "like" or "um," thus sounding more literate and intelligent. And what's there to make sure they do just that? A trusty spatula from Andrew's kitchen—if any member of the Grawlix slips up, the other members get to hit them on the hand as hard as they can, like a schoolmarm in some terrifying British movie. Want to sound smarter? Get ready for a little pain. Featuring standup clips from Miriam Moreno and Mat Alano-Martin! Visit our Patreon page for outtakes and bonus goodies from this episode and more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Andrew tries online dating. In an attempt to get him back out there on the playing field, Ben and Adam write an online dating profile for Andrew. Meanwhile, Andrew challenges Ben and Adam to improve their own love lives by taking their respective wives out on dates of Andrew's design. Love is in the air. Featuring standup clips from Nick Vatterott and Lizzy Cooperman! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon for ad-free episodes, outtakes and bonus goodies from this episode! Go out to dinner wearing your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys eat at restaurants they would never in a million years otherwise consider. You know those restaurants that you've driven by a million times? The ones that have all but blurred into the wallpaper of your morning commute? Establishments that you hardly even notice anymore except to maybe wonder, "How does that place stay open? Who in their right mind actually eats there?" The answer to that question is the Grawlix. The Grawlix eat there. In this episode anyway, as a way to escape their usual routines. The results are...surprising. Featuring standup comedy clips from Debra DiGiovanni and our own Adam Cayton-Holland. Enjoy! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! The boys made a video of the Grilled Cheese Glory Hole in action—support us on Patreon to see that video, photos of Andrew's meal, and so much more! Go out to dinner wearing your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The boys take a much-needed break from social media. For the inaugural episode of "The Grawlix Saves the World," Ben, Adam and Andrew attempt to better themselves—and thus the world around them—by taking a break from social media for a week. Will the break render them irrelevant? Will they sanctimoniously feel like they're better than everyone else for doing it? Will Ben realize he has the social media addiction of a petulant tween? All will be revealed. Featuring standup comedy clips from Mo Welch and Dave Ross! LINKS: See The Grawlix LIVE on the last Saturday of the month at the historic Bug Theatre in Denver! Support us on Patreon and receive ad-free episodes, bonus videos, birthday shout-outs, exclusive merch, a video welcome message from Ben, and more! Get your own official Grawlix merch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices