10% Happier with Dan Harris

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Oftentimes Buddhism can take a tough love, no nonsense approach to happiness by saying, if you want to be happier, sometimes you need to face hard truths. In today's episode we're going to talk about a Buddhist list called The Three Characteristics. These are the three non-negotiable truths about reality, which you have to see and understand in order to be happy. Granted, when looked at from a certain angle, these truths, or characteristics of reality can suck at times. But do you want to see the truth of things or not? Do you want to be happier or not? Our guide through these three characteristics is the mighty Mushim Patricia Ikeda. Mushim has a background in both monastic and lay Buddhist practice and is a core teacher and community director at the East Bay Meditation Center in Oakland, California. This is her second appearance on the show. Content Warning: This episode briefly mentions child loss. In this episode we talk about: The three characteristics, alternatively known as the three Dharma seals Our conflicted relationship to change Our brain's tendency to focus on the negative Practices that can help with handling change more effectively How not taking your thoughts so personally can build your resilience And why Mushim believes that universal non-discriminating love is synonymous with Nirvana Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/mushim-patricia-ikeda-484

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- These days, the word mindfulness has become a buzz phrase but very often people don't know what the word actually means, much less how to practice it. One simple definition of mindfulness is the ability to see what's happening in your mind without getting carried away by it. The benefits of doing so are vast and profound— from decreased emotional reactivity to being more awake to what's actually happening in your life. Today's guest Joseph Goldstein talks about a classic Buddhist list called the four foundations of mindfulness, which lays out various techniques for developing mindfulness within your practice. Goldstein is one of the premier western proponents of Mindfulness. He co-founded the legendary Insight Meditation Society alongside Sharon Salzberg and Jack Kornfield. He also wrote a book called Mindfulness: A Practical Guide to Awakening. In this episode we talk about: The historical context for the four foundations of mindfulness Why he thinks the Buddha loved lists Why the Buddha placed mindfulness of the body first on the list The steps to mastering mindfulness of the body The meaning of the word embodied and how that's different from our usual mode of being in the world How and why to do walking meditations What are feeling tones and why are they important Practices for cultivating mindfulness of mind And we talk about some of the mantras that Joseph uses when teaching Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/joseph-goldstein-483

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- There are so many benefits to mindfulness with one of the biggest being the cultivation of more self-awareness. This cultivation can lead to identifying the unhelpful mental habits that can develop over the years. Today we're going to talk to Carol Wilson who offers very clear and practical ways that Buddhist meditation can help us turn down the volume on our unproductive mental habits and be less reactive. Wilson is a guiding teacher at the Insight Meditation Society, where for many years she has taught their annual three-month retreat. She began her insight meditation practice in 1971 in India and in the 1980s she spent a year in Thailand as a Buddhist nun. In this episode we talk about: How to be mindful throughout the day The concept of 360 degree awareness Noticing when one experiences wanting or aversion Why Wilson believes that the root of suffering comes from making it all about us How seeing torment can help us experience freedom from the self The benefits of reflecting on your past acts of generosity Bringing awareness to your motivations And doing a gratitude practice regularly to change the weather pattern in your mind Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/carol-wilson-481

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Many of us may have a reflexive reaction when we notice we're feeling down: we want it to go away. Maybe we think something is wrong with us and we automatically self medicate in any number of ways. But how do we square this with the fact that many of us may also really like sad movies and music? And making things even more complex, how do we compute the fact that the universe is constantly handing us opportunities to feel awe, gratitude, and joy, often at the exact same moment that sadness arises? What's going on with this complex and conflicted relationship we have with a perfectly normal human emotion? Our guest today Susan Cain has written a whole book about this called Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole. In this book, she explores how the capacity to tune in to the inherent joy and sadness of the human situation can be a superpower for connection. In this episode we talk about: Whether bittersweetness is a skill you can hone The relationship between bittersweetness and the Buddhist concept of impermanence Why we feel embarrassed about discussing sorrow and longing How sadness can be transmuted into creativity, and how that creativity can lead us out of sadness And how America, a country founded on so much heartache, turned into, in her words, "a culture of normative smiles" Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/susan-cain-480

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Sit in meditation for a few minutes and you're likely to experience pain, either physical or psychological. Hang around the meditation scene for very long, and you are likely to hear the expression, "Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." And that's what this episode is all about— boosting your pain tolerance through meditation. Because pain really is inevitable, but can you reduce your suffering through mindfulness and compassion? Our guest today, Christiane Wolf, argues 'yes'. She is a physician turned mindfulness and compassion teacher and teacher trainer. She is an authorized Buddhist teacher in the Insight (Vipassana) meditation tradition, teaching classes and retreats worldwide, and she's also the author of ​Outsmart Your Pain: Mindfulness and Self-Compassion to Help You Leave Chronic Pain Behind. In this episode we talk about: Meditation techniques that offer us a better relationship to pain How to work with the physicality of pain The stories we tell ourselves about our pain And seeing pain as an opportunity Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/christiane-wolf-rerun

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- We all have long-standing painful patterns of behavior or inner storylines that can cause us to react disproportionately or inappropriately to everyday events. Today's guest, Dr. Radhule Weininger, has a term for this. She calls them longstanding recurrent painful patterns or LRPPs. Weininger is a clinical psychologist, psychotherapist, and teacher of Buddhist meditation and Buddhist psychology. She has a new book, Heart Medicine: How to Stop Painful Patterns and Find Peace and Freedom—at Last In this episode we talk about: How to recognize a problematic pattern or when you've been "lrpp-ed" Why Dr. Weininger believes that Buddhism and western psychology, when practiced together, can help us deal with these recurring patterns Unpacking the word trauma The psychological term "mismatch" and how it relates to childhood trauma or hurt How to practice meditation in order to tolerate discomfort Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/radhule-weininger-478

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Today we're gonna tackle one of the best known contemplative clichés: being in the present moment and inhabiting the now. The present moment seems to be a state we aspire towards, but are rarely given practical information about how to actually achieve. But today's guest, Matthew Brensilver offers just that— practical information on how to achieve being present. We also explore his argument that when painful memories surface in meditation, it acts as a kind of exposure therapy that acclimates us to the things we may not want to face. This is Matthew Brensilver's second appearance on the show. He teaches retreats at the Insight Retreat Center, Spirit Rock and other Buddhist centers. Before committing to teach meditation full-time, he spent years doing research on addiction pharmacotherapy at the UCLA Center for Behavioral and Addiction Medicine. Matthew is the co-author of two books about meditation during adolescence and continues to be interested in the unfolding dialogue between Buddhism and science. In this episode we talk about: What "be present" actually means What to do when Buddhist teachings or meditation instructions feel out of reach and when we start compulsively self-assessing against them What to do when a memory arises in meditation, especially a difficult memory The brain's tendency toward constant prediction The benefits of meditation retreat And distinguishing between true alarms and false alarms Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/matthew-brensilver-476

Often, when you're afraid of something, the best advice is deeply counterintuitive, not to mention inconvenient: to turn toward the source of your fear. Today we're going to talk about the fear of confronting your own past with our guest Sarah Polley. Polley is an Oscar nominated filmmaker and actress who recently wrote a new book, called Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory. In her book, she explores the relationship between her past and present and how the two are in constant dialogue. In this episode we talk about: The story of her concussion and the unusual advice she got from a specialist that became not just a path to recovery, but a sort of personal credo, "run toward the danger" What we often do with our stories of childhood shame, and the immense power of talking about it How she has come to stop seeing her anxiety as a stop sign Her argument that the advice to "listen to your body" is not always the best advice The liberating potential of intentionally making uncharacteristic decisions Her path to meditation and her current practice And the limits of her own "run towards the danger" mantra Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/sarah-polley-475

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Depression is a debilitating problem both on an individual and a societal level and it has only gotten worse during the pandemic. According to the World Health Organization, depression is now one of the leading causes of disability on the planet. Our guest today Dr. Samantha Boardman is going to talk about what she calls the opposite of depression— something called positive psychiatry. This approach focuses on the positive things in the lives of her patients rather than just the pathologies. Boardman is a Clinical Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at Weill Cornell Medical College, which is also where she went to medical school and did her four year residency program. She later went back and got a Master's degree in Applied Positive Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. She recently put out a book called Everyday Vitality: Turning Stress into Strength In this episode we talked about: The 3 C's (factors contributing to vitality) The notion that our understanding of happiness does not have to be internally oriented How not all socializing is created equal Why identifying your values is important The value of hobbies The flake factor And the value of failure Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/samantha-boardman-473

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Anxiety has long been a massive societal issue that has spiked during the pandemic. In this episode, renowned Buddhist monk Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche talks in detail about how he personally works with anxiety and panic and the practices he draws upon when dealing with these states. Mingyur began doing long retreats in his teens and now teaches all over the world. He's written the books The Joy of Living: Unlocking the Secret and Science of Happiness and In Love with the World: A Monk's Journey Through the Bardos of Living and Dying. He also oversees the Tergar Meditation Community, a global network of Buddhist meditation centers. In this episode we talk about: Working with strong emotions using sound and the breath Deconstructing your reality to make it workable Understanding what awareness is in a Buddhist sense How to make meditation free-range and available to you all times The simple but also tricky advice of, "stop doing and just be" When to take a step back or even take a break from meditation What Mingyur Rinpoche says is the true purpose of the practice. This interview was recorded in person at the TED conference in April of 2022, where both Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche and Dan Harris spoke. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/yongey-mingyur-rinpoche-472

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- In this episode, the social justice educator and activist Jacoby Ballard talks about a universal, or near universal, issue: anger. And, he offers us two mental skills that can help channel anger into something even more powerful and effective. Those skills are forgiveness and equanimity. Ballard is a meditation and yoga teacher and the author of a new book called, A Queer Dharma: Yoga and Meditations for Liberation Content Warnings: There are some brief references to sensitive topics, including trauma and suicide. In this episode we talk about: How he went from an activist largely fueled by anger to a dharma teacher with a very different approach The sometimes useful role of anger in activism and the danger of being stuck in anger mode The subtle but powerful move of getting in touch with what is beneath our anger Using annoyance as a jumping off point for inner investigation Ways to work with anger and learning to discharge the energy in our body Forgiveness, including forgiving ourselves Getting over our need to be right Equanimity, or as Jacoby calls it, his "tussle with equanimity" Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/jacoby-ballard-470

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- How, on this planet, did we go from molten lava and shifting tectonic plates to sentient beings? How are you awake and aware right now? Who and where and what exactly is the "you" that is experiencing everything? Guest Anil Seth says that exploring these questions can lead to real and radical changes in your life, including reducing your emotional reactivity. Seth is a Professor of Cognitive and Computational Neuroscience at the University of Sussex, Co-Director of the Sackler Centre for Consciousness Science and Editor-in-Chief of Neuroscience of Consciousness. His TED Talk on consciousness has been viewed over 13 million times. Most recently, he is the author of Being You: A New Science of Consciousness. In this episode we talk about: How brains give rise to consciousness The bundle theory of self The comfort in thinking of the self as impermanent A new way to think about emotional states How Seth's personal experience with long COVID has changed his own sense of self The question of whether we have free will Whether machines can be conscious – and whether we should be afraid of artificial intelligence Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/anil-seth-469

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- One of the most common and insidious complaints of meditators is distraction, which can be a frustrating and difficult obstacle. Even the Buddha himself acknowledged this common problem and laid out some detailed practices for dealing with it. In this episode, Shaila Catherine outlines the Buddha's five strategies to help us tackle distractions, which can be applied to our meditation practice as well as other aspects of our lives. Catherine is a dharma teacher whose latest book is called Beyond Distraction: Five Practical Ways to Focus the Mind. She is also the founder and principal teacher at Insight Meditation South Bay and has 40 years of practice, including nine years, cumulatively, of silent retreat. Her first TPH appearance, which we called How to Focus, aired in May 2021. In this episode we talk about: The Buddha's struggles with distraction Shaila's attempts to make the teachings of the Buddha accessible to contemporary minds The importance of getting to know your own thought patterns The counterintuitive strategy of "avoid it, ignore it, forget it" Replacing seduction with mindfulness Developing a flexibility of mind Why we're vulnerable to our own tendencies when we're not mindful Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/shaila-catherine-467

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- It seems like a design flaw in our species that we live in a world of constant change yet most of us are not comfortable with uncertainty. In this episode, we talk to Maya Shankar about how to get better at dealing with change and to stop seeking what scientists call "cognitive closure." Shankar is a former Senior Advisor in the Obama White House, where she founded and served as Chair of the White House Behavioral Science Team. She also served as the first Behavioral Science Advisor to the United Nations, and is currently a Senior Director of Behavioral Economics at Google. She is the host of the Pushkin Industries podcast A Slight Change of Plans, which was named Best Show of the Year in 2021 by Apple. In this episode we talk about: Why humans are so uncomfortable with uncertainty and change What a behavioral scientist actually does in the world Why even the host of a podcast about change isn't immune to the uncertainties of life The benefits of cultivating a more malleable sense of self Why humans are such bad forecasters The importance of auditing yourself when you're undergoing a big change How to take advantage of big reset moments The concept of cognitive closure and why encouraging an open mind can make us more resilient Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/maya-shankar-466

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- "The quality of your relationships determines the quality of your life." These words from the legendary Esther Perel have the power to genuinely change your outlook on life. But while it's easy to hear them and immediately have your mind go to family relationships or romantic relationships, today we're going to talk about friendships. Friendships can be massive contributors to mental health. They can also, when they go pear-shaped, be the source of abundant misery. Today's guest is the legendary Esther Perel. Her resume is beyond impressive: She is a psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of books such as Mating in Captivity. Her TED talk has attracted more than 30 million views. She is fluent in nine languages. She is the host of the popular podcasts Where Should We Begin? and How's Work? And her latest project is called Where Should We Begin - A Game of Stories with Esther Perel. In this episode we talk about: How the pandemic has impacted our friendships Esther's contention that "love and commitment and intimacy don't just belong to the world of romantic couples" What makes friendship unique, in good ways and tricky ways What to consider when determining whether to confront a difficulty in a friendship How to conduct a self-assessment of yourself as a friend How systematic we should be about cultivating and maintaining our friendships How to reconnect with friends authentically Whether or not we can have platonic friendships across the gender spectrum How to handle friendships when you're in a romantic relationship, including friendships you share, friendships with those with whom your partner doesn't get along, and friendships with exes Content warning: There are some brief references to sensitive topics, including suicide. *Esther Perel invites you and a colleague to apply for a session with her that will be part of the new season of her podcast How's Work? Her team is looking for work pairs, co-founders, colleagues, managers, or any combination to join her for a session to explore the future of work together. Apply here. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/esther-perel-464

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Life is filled with all kinds of moral dilemmas— from the mundane to the momentous. Should I lie and tell my friend that I like her ugly shirt? Can I still enjoy great art if it was created by terrible people? How much money should I give to charity? Ultimately, does anything we do even matter? In today's conversation, television writer and producer, Michael Schur helps us to navigate our moral dilemmas and answer some of these difficult questions. Schur is best known for creating and co-creating such shows as Parks and Recreation, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Good Place, and Rutherford Falls. Additionally, he has worked on shows like The Office, Master of None, The Comeback, and Hacks. He is also the Author of How to Be Perfect: The Correct Answer to Every Moral Question. In this episode we talk about: What got him started on the road to reading philosophy and studying ethics The so-called "trolley problem" Trusting your gut Natural states of virtue The evolutionary advantages of virtue And how white lies can be beneficial in a complicated and messy society This interview was recorded in person at the TED conference in April of 2022, where both Michael Schur and Dan Harris spoke. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/michael-schur-463

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- How much would your relationships improve if you could up your emotional intelligence game? That phrase, "emotional intelligence" or EQ, entered the lexicon over 25 years ago, when Daniel Goleman wrote a book by the same name. In this episode, Daniel Goleman talks about the four components of emotional intelligence and how we can develop these skills in our daily lives. Golman is a Harvard-trained psychologist who, along with other contemplative luminaries such as Joseph Goldstein, Sharon Salzberg and Jon Kabat-Zinn, went to Asia and discovered meditation in the 1960s— making it a huge part of their lives and careers. In this episode we talk about: The four components of emotional intelligence, how to develop them, and why these skills matter so much during the middle of a pandemic Empathy and relationship management in the age of zoom The "marshmallow test" and impulse control A phenomenon he calls, "amygdala hijacks" Why so many Jewish kids in the sixties and seventies got turned on to Buddhism Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/daniel-goleman-repost

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- It's completely natural when dealing with anxiety, depression, anger, shame, or any other unpleasant emotion, to just want it to go away. Guest Susan David says that these discomforts are the price of admission to being alive and offers an approach called emotional agility as a way to navigate them. Susan David, Ph.D. is a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and author of a book called Emotional Agility. Her TED Talk on the subject has been viewed more than eight million times. In this episode we talk about: Her definition of emotional agility The four skills of emotional agility Why she says our emotions are data, not directives How to move skillfully through a world that "conspires against us seeing ourselves" How to avoid emotional "fusion" The power of tiny tweaks And "emotional granularity"— what it is, why it matters and how to practice it Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/susan-david-461

The phrase, "Get over yourself" is often used in a flippant way, but it's actually speaking to a deep human need to get out of our heads and off our own backs. At a fundamental level, this is what Buddhism is all about— seeing through the illusion of the self, which can be the source of so much of our suffering. In this episode guest Pascal Auclair talks about how we can unlock this suffering through the use of a foundational Buddhist list called the five aggregates. Pascal Auclair has been immersed in Buddhist practice and study since 1997. He has been mentored by Joseph Goldstein and Jack Kornfield at the Insight Meditation Society (IMS) in Massachusetts and Spirit Rock Meditation Center in California, where he is now enjoying teaching retreats. Pascal teaches in North America and in Europe. He is a co-founder of True North Insight and one of their guiding teachers. In this episode we talk about: How the five aggregates got Auclair hooked on Buddhist practice and philosophy The five aggregates as a way to work with difficulty Living with the non-negotiable prospect of dying Paying attention to pleasant, unpleasant and neutral feeling tone Meditation training as a way to understand that experiences are conditional Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/pascal-auclair-459

Our culture has oddly conflicting views about pleasure. In this episode, author adrienne maree brown explores the importance of pleasure and how it changes your experience of the world. adrienne maree brown is the writer-in-residence at the Emergent Strategy Ideation Institute, and author of Grievers (the first novella in a trilogy on the Black Dawn imprint), Holding Change: The Way of Emergent Strategy Facilitation and Mediation, We Will Not Cancel Us and Other Dreams of Transformative Justice, Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good, Emergent Strategy: Shaping Change, Changing Worlds and the co-editor of Octavia's Brood: Science Fiction from Social Justice Movements and How to Get Stupid White Men Out of Office. She is the cohost of the How to Survive the End of the World, Octavia's Parables and Emergent Strategy podcasts. adrienne is rooted in Detroit. In this conversation we talked about: What is pleasure activism The role of sex and drugs Why we should say yes more How to be in touch with our sense of "enough" The role of gratitude The line between commitment and detachment How she defines authentic happiness Her self-description as "a recovering self-righteous organizer," and why self-righteousness actually leads to powerlessness Content Warning: Discussions of sex and drugs. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/adrienne-maree-brown-458

In a culture that values persistent productivity, one can be left feeling chronically behind. In this episode, author and recovering time management junkie, Oliver Burkeman encourages us to stop scrambling to fit it all in by exploring the relationship between our mortality and getting things done. Oliver Burkeman is the author of Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals. Former guest Adam Grant has called it, "The most important book ever written about time management." This is Oliver's second appearance on the show. Burkeman joined us on the show a few years ago to talk about his other book, The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking. He also writes a bi-weekly email newsletter called The Imperfectionist. In this conversation, we talk about: Why accepting mortality is a crucial step in improving our relationship to time His conviction that it's not about being more efficient. It's about knowing what to neglect Patience as a superpower and the impatience spiral The benefits of burning bridges Becoming a better procrastinator The benefits of rest What he calls "cosmic insignificance therapy" Practical tips, such as the "fixed volume approach to productivity," the value of serialization, and strategic underachievement. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/oliver-burkeman-456

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Our guest this week is Alicia Menendez, an award-winning journalist, who finds herself in a common position for many women: caring way too much about what others think of her. Be nice, but not too nice. Be successful, but not too successful. Just be likable, whatever that means. In the workplace strong women are often criticized for being cold, while warm women may be seen as pushovers. In her book, The Likeability Trap, and in this conversation, she discusses this issue and explains how and why both men and women should combat it. In this conversation, we talk about: The aforementioned likability trap The structural imbalance in feedback for women and men in the workplace The things for men to consider as they engage with women in the workplace Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/alicia-menendez-212

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Sometimes part of healing trauma means learning how to be human. This episode is the last episode of our Mental Health Reboot series to mark Mental Health Awareness Month. Dr. Jacob Ham, who was introduced in Stephanie Foo's episode earlier this week, helped Stephanie through her case of complex PTSD and discusses how to live with the hardest things that have happened to you. Dr. Ham is the Director of the Center for Child Trauma and Resilience and Clinical Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai. He sees children, youth, adults, and families across the age range and for a variety of issues. In this episode we talk about: What Dr. Ham says may be the "most important thing he's discovered" as a therapist Why he shuts down his clients' attempts to intellectualize their experiences Kairos versus kronos Why Dr. Ham says the Incredible Hulk is so important to him The concept of mentalization What it means to love exquisitely And whether or not we have to learn to love ourselves before we can learn to love others Content Warning: Explicit language. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/jacob-ham-453

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- We've all had difficult, and sometimes horrible things happen to us. While some people may be luckier than others, it's rare that anyone goes unscathed. This episode is part of our Mental Health Reboot series to mark Mental Health Awareness Month. In this episode, Stephanie Foo shares her story of being diagnosed with complex PTSD and how she learned to process her trauma and live with her past. The result of her journey is a new book called What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma. Stephanie Foo is a journalist and radio producer. Her previous work includes This American Life, The Cut, Reply All, and 99% Invisible. Her writing has been featured in The New York Times and Vox. In this conversation we talk about: The various therapies, meditation styles, and wellness modalities Stephanie explored to help process her trauma What actually worked for her, and how it might be relevant to other survivors Shame, gratitude, and self-love Her transformative work with Dr. Jacob Ham, who will be featured in another episode this week. Content Warnings: Discussions of trauma and abuse, references to addiction and mental health challenges. Explicit language. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/stephanie-foo-452

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Very few of us will live a life without loss. As part of our Mental Health Reboot series in recognition of Mental Health Awareness Month, this week's episodes talk a lot about grieving. Mary-Frances O'Connor, an expert in bereavement research, explores the science of how we grieve and experience loss, whether it's a job or a loved one. Mary-Frances O'Connor is an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and Psychiatry at the University of Arizona, where she is also the Director of Clinical Training. And she is the author of a book called The Grieving Brain. In this episode we talk about: The distinction between grief and grieving How her Buddhist practice has influenced her understanding of grief Whether or not we can ever quote/unquote "get over it" Why she argues for "a really big toolkit of coping strategies" How to understand the work of Elizabeth Kübler-Ross today What grieving looks like in a pandemic What to say to people who are grieving The new diagnosis of prolonged grief disorder Content Warning: Brief mention of suicide. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/mary-frances-oconnor-450

How do you find hope in a lifetime that has experienced more trauma than most? Guest Jonathan Van Ness says that the key is to stay curious and focus on happiness and joy, even if it's just in a tiny corner. Jonathan Van Ness is a hairstylist by trade and best known as one of the hosts of the Netflix series Queer Eye. He is also the author of Love That Story and the New York Times bestselling memoir Over the Top, and the host of the podcast Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness. In this episode we talk about: The universality of processing grief What a "window of tolerance" means Getting curious about shame Body dysmorphia JVN's complex and contradictory feelings about shopping What "parts therapy" or Internal Family Systems therapy is Setting boundaries Connecting and cultivating joy Content Warning: Explicit language and mentions of sexual abuse, substance amuse, body dysmorphia, and references to sex. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/jonathan-van-ness-447

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- There is an unstoppable flow of gain and loss within our lives. Processing this flow helps us to develop equanimity. In this conversation, Pulitzer Prize-winner and New Yorker staff writer Kathryn Schulz discusses her new book Lost and Found: A Memoir, in which she explores experiencing both a huge loss anda huge gain, and how to live in a world where both happiness and pain commingle. In this episode we talk about: How humans experience grief A gift you can give to the grieving Why she loves the clichés that remind us to enjoy the moment Her broad understanding of the term "loss" Why the key word in 'lost and found' is "and" What she's learned about compromising in relationships Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kathryn-schulz-449

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- How does hope work? In this episode from the archives, Rutgers University clinical psychologist Dr. Jacqueline Mattis discusses hope from a scientific perspective and how we can cultivate it. Dr. Mattis, who is also a Dean of faculty at Rutgers, did not start her career wanting to study hope. She started out studying spirituality and religiosity, specifically concentrating her field work and interviews in African-American and Afri-Caribbean urban communities. She wanted to know why people living under high stress conditions so often choose to be good and compassionate. And that research ultimately led her to hope. In this episode we talk about: How her family history influenced her relationship to optimism and faith The difference between spirituality and religiosity The benefits of hope and skills to cultivate it The ways hope can go wrong And the benefits of denial Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/jacqueline-mattis-340-repost

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- If you're trying to improve your sleep, thinking about doing so right before you get into bed might not be the best approach. Dr. Sara Mednick, is a cognitive neuroscientist at the University of California, Irvine, and the author of the new book The Power of the Downstate. This episode is part of our month-long "Mental Health Reboot" series to mark Mental Health Awareness Month. According to her research, Dr. Mednick says that we need to take a more holistic approach to getting better sleep, and that sleep is just one of the ways that our bodies rest and restore. In this conversation, we talk about: The nuances of napping Dr. Mednick's definition of the "downstate" Whether there are practices that can compensate for poor sleep Why heart rate variability is an important measurement of health Why sex is so helpful for sleep And when to take melatonin to best effect Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/sara-mednick-445

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Sleep may be the apex predator of healthy habits, so why are so many of us getting terrible sleep? Guest Diane Macedo launched a very detailed personal investigation in order to fix her sleeping habits and joins us for the first episode of a month-long "Mental Health Reboot" series we're doing to mark Mental Health Awareness Month. Diane Macedo is the author of the new book The Sleep Fix: Practical, Proven, and Surprising Solutions for Insomnia, Snoring, Shift Work, and More. As an ABC News anchor and correspondent, she appears on Good Morning America, World News Tonight, and Nightline. She's also the daytime anchor for ABC News Live. In this episode we talk about: Key signs that you're not getting enough sleep Do sleeping pills really work When and how to find a sleep specialist How to deal with performance anxiety around sleep The difference between sleep deprivation and insomnia Mindfulness and sleep And the biggest sleep myths Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/diane-macedo-444

Can you become happier, more balanced, and practice equanimity without losing your edge? Guest Kamala Masters was one of the teachers at Dan's first ever meditation retreat. In this episode she dives into how to develop equanimity and shares her story of learning how to practice meditation during her everyday life while raising three children on her own. Kamala Masters has been meditating since the 1970s, first with Anagarika Munindra, who was Joseph Goldstein's first teacher, and then with the Burmese master Sayadaw U Pandita with whom she twice temporarily ordained as a Buddhist nun. More recently, she's been training with another Burmese master we've talked about here on the show, Sayadaw U Tejaniya. She is a Guiding Teacher at the Insight Meditation Society, and the co-founder of the Vipassana Metta Foundation, which developed the Maui Dharma Sanctuary. In this conversation we talk about: What is equanimity? The most common misconception about equanimity The near and far enemies of equanimity The power and limitations of setting intentions Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kamala-masters-442

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Why is it that many men seem unenthusiastic about discussing body image issues? We take a deep dive into this topic with Aaron Flores, a Los Angeles-based registered dietician and nutritionist, and one of the few men very active in the space of intuitive eating. Aaron talks about how capitalism ties our weight to our worthiness, and his notion that "our body is not a project." In this episode we also discuss: What intuitive eating is How men experience body image issues, and why they often don't talk about it The relationship between diet culture and capitalism What "health at every size" means and why it's sometimes controversial Guidelines for parents The role of self-compassion when it comes to food Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/aaron-flores-441

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Many of us find our minds flitting all over the place, in meditation and elsewhere. In today's episode we're going to learn practical techniques for boosting concentration on and off the cushion. This is the second episode in a two-part series on focus we are airing this week. Today's guest is an Olympic-level concentrator who has tons of tips for staying focused. We also talk about one of the more exotic meditation subjects: The altered states of consciousness called the jhanas that are available to advanced meditators who can attain deep states of concentration. Shaila Catherine is the founder of Insight Meditation South Bay, a meditation group in Silicon Valley. She has been practicing meditation since 1980 and has more than nine years of accumulated silent retreat experience. She's the author of Focused and Fearless: A Meditator's Guide to States of Deep Joy, Calm, and Clarity. In this conversation, we talk about: The basic building blocks of concentration in a meditation practice Cultivating the right attitude for meditation The difference between concentration and mindfulness Whether 'jhana' states are attainable for regular people Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/shaila-catherine-repost-348

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- What is it about modern life that is completely disrupting our ability to focus, and how much of it is our fault? Turns out, not a lot. A number of factors from technology to our sleep habits, and even air pollution, play a role in what causes us to have about the same attention regulation skills as a kitten. In this first episode of our two-part series on focus, guest Johann Hari breaks down why our ability to pay attention is collapsing, and what we can do about it. Johann Hari is the author of Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention – and How to Think Deeply Again. His first book, Chasing the Scream: the First and Last Days of the War on Drugs was adapted into the Oscar nominated film The United States Vs Billie Holiday as well as a documentary series. Johann is also the author of Lost Connections: Uncovering The Real Causes of Depression – and the Unexpected Solutions which was featured in a previous episode. His TED Talks have been viewed more than 80 million times. In this episode we talk about: Johann's notion that there are twelve factors draining our focus His argument for the importance of both collective and individual action to reclaim our attention What he learned from a self-imposed three-month internet-free experiment How this impacts our children, and what we might do about it Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/johann-hari-439

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- What if one of the keys to happiness is how intentional you are with your time? Ashley Whillans is an Assistant Professor at Harvard Business School and author of the book Time Smart. Her groundbreaking research has led her to radically reevaluate how she spends her own time. Her goal is to help you move from time poverty to time affluence. In this conversation, we talk about: How to do a time audit Funding time, finding time, and reframing time The surprising extent to which prioritizing time over money predicts happiness–and what to do if you usually do the opposite How to handle "time confetti" The value of canceling meetings Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/ashley-whillans-repost-318

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Often, we are our own worst critic. In this episode, Buddhist monk Ajahn Sucitto explores ways to unseat the inner tyrant and make peace with the nagging voice inside of you that seems to always demand perfection, but never offer praise. Ajahn Sucitto was raised in the United Kingdom and became a monk in 1975 in the lineage of the Thai forest master, Venerable Ajahn Chah. In 1979, he helped establish Cittaviveka, also known as Chithurst Forest Monastery, in West Sussex, England where he still lives. In this episode we talk about: Strategies for addressing our inner critic Why we shouldn't operate at 100% The foolishness of turning our minds into courts of law The Buddhist precepts (or ethical guidelines) And the essential nature of sangha/community Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/ajahn-sucitto-437

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Brené Brown has found that most people are only able to identify three emotions: happy, sad and pissed off. In this episode we explore how better understanding the full spectrum of your emotions, rather than drowning in them, can become an upward spiral. Brené Brown is the author of six #1 New York Times bestsellers. Her latest book is Atlas of the Heart, which is also the name of her new HBO Max series. Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston and a visiting professor in management at the University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business.She has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. Her TED talk on the Power of Vulnerability is one of the top five most-viewed TED talks in the world, with over 50 million views. We Talk About: Why she decided to map the 87 key emotions and experiences How she was deeply influenced by the Buddhist concept of the "near enemy" Why she no longer believes it's possible to read emotions in other people Why meaningful connections require boundaries Content Warning: This episode contains explicit language, but a clean version of the episode is available at tenpercent.com and on the Ten Percent Happier app. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brene-brown-436

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- This episode dives into our archives to revisit the notion of communication as a learnable skill. Often some of the most painful situations you encounter are the result of poor communication. The good news is that communication is a skill that can be learned. Author and meditation teacher Oren Jay Sofer, a leading figure in the field of interpersonal communication, breaks down how communication can be one of the most powerful levers for creating positive change in your life. Oren Jay Sofer is the author of Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. He also teaches mindfulness, meditation and nonviolent communication in secular and Buddhist contexts. He graduated from Insight Meditation Center's Spirit Rock Vipassana Teacher Training and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto. In this conversation, we also talk about: How to become aware of what motivates you to communicate the way you do Strategies for how to have more meaningful conversations What it means to lead with presence How conflict has the possibility to deepen our relationships and make peace Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/oren-jay-sofer-repost-165

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. -- What role does mindfulness and meditation play when it comes to sex? It may be the key to alleviating sexual distress in your relationships, and in this episode Dr. Lori Brotto talks about scientific evidence that shows how mindfulness can improve your sex life. Dr. Lori Brotto is a clinical psychologist, the director of the University of British Columbia's Sexual Health Laboratory, the Canada Research Chair in Women's Sexual Health; the Executive Director of the Women's Health Research Institute; and the author of Better Sex through Mindfulness. We talk about: Mindfulness practices for individuals and couples who want to improve their sex lives The number one cause of sexual distress and how it manifests in different genders The importance of "interoception" or awareness of our bodily sensations Identifying the most common myths about sex Content Warning: This episode includes conversations about sex. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/lori-brotto-435

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. This episode explores a Buddhist tool for resolving conflict and keeping your relationships on the rails. This tool, known as the Beginning Anew practice, was designed by the Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh, who died back in January, and who we are celebrating this week on the show. On Monday's episode, we spoke with a long-time student of Thich Nhat Hanh, Brother Phap Dung. Today's guest is Kaira Jewel Lingo. She was an ordained nun for 15 years in Thich Nhat Hanh's Order of Interbeing. She's now a lay dharma teacher based on Long Island. She graduated from Stanford University with a B.A. and an M.A. in anthropology and social sciences. She's also the author of a recent book called, We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons on Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption. This interview discusses the Beginning Anew practice and: The four steps of the practice. How even skeptics can see the value in the practice. How it can strengthen relationships and resolve conflict. Kaira Jewel's own experience with the practice as both a teacher and a practitioner. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kaira-jewel-lingo-repost

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. -- In January 2022, Thich Nhat Hanh, the Vietnamese Zen master, peace activist, poet, and author passed away. He was the founder of the International Plum Village Community of Engaged Buddhism. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. called him "an Apostle of peace and nonviolence" when nominating him for the Nobel Peace Prize. Thousands of people came out for his funeral. Brother Pháp Dung is making his second appearance on the show to talk about Thich Nhat Hanh. If you missed it last time he was on, Brother Pháp Dung has an incredible personal story. He was born in Vietnam in 1969 and came to the US at the age of nine. He worked as an architect/designer for four years before becoming a monk. He was very close personally with Thich Nhat Hanh, who he refers to as "Thây," or teacher, and is now a Dharma teacher himself in Thich Nhat Hanh's Plum Village tradition. This episode explores: The life of Thich Nhat Hanh: his path to Buddhism in the 1960's and his exile from Vietnam for opposing the war. The meaning of "wrong view" or wrong perception. What non-separation and inter-being is. Thich Nhat Hanh's view that birth and death are only notions. Grief, and why learning how to suffer will help you suffer less. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brother-phap-dung-432

Many, if not all, of us have a nonstop, ambient thought-track running through our minds of: how am I doing? How do I look? Why did I say that? Am I running behind? What do other people think of me? How did we get this way? And what do we do about it? Ron Siegel has thought a lot about this, and has plenty of practical answers, including the notion that we should lean into our insignificance. Many of us grew up being told how we were special. But Ron argues that the words, "you're not special," constitute extremely good news. Dr. Ron Siegel is a part-time assistant professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School and a board member at the Institute for Meditation and Psychotherapy. In his private clinical practice, he provides mindfulness-oriented psychotherapy. He is also the author of the new book, The The Extraordinary Gift of Being Ordinary: Finding Happiness Right Where You Are. The episode explores: The notion that we didn't evolve to be happy. Why we self-evaluate The downsides and upsides of self-assessment. Strategies for dealing with this often irrational self-grading criteria, which include mindfulness, self-compassion, and gratitude. What it means to "lean our ladder against the right wall." Content Warning: This conversation includes brief references to mature topics, including sex and addiction. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/ron-siegel-431

How can we meditate when it seems like the world is falling apart? How do we titrate our news consumption? What do we do with our fears about World War III? How can we do anything constructive to help given how far away many of us are from the action? Why are so many people so upset about Ukraine when they weren't paying much attention to the wars raging in places like Syria, Yemen, or Ethiopia? Today's guest is uniquely qualified to answer these questions, given his experience in combat. Claude AnShin Thomas is an ordained monk in the Japanese Soto Zen Tradition. At 17, he signed up to fight in Vietnam and spent his tour of duty in the theater of war, surrounded by death and destruction. He came home suffering from an undiagnosed case of PTSD and spent years grappling with addiction and homelessness before he was introduced to Buddhism. He says meditation can help all of us look at the roots of war and violence that we all harbor. Claude Anshin is now the founder of the Zaltho Foundation, dedicated to addressing the causes and consequences of violence in and among individuals, families, and societies. He has served in war zones, hospitals, schools, and prisons. He has also led meditation retreats at sites of war and suffering, and has worked with gang members, guerillas, and refugees. He is the author of the award-winning book At Hell's Gate: A Soldier's Journey from War to Peace, which has been translated into several languages, and Bringing Meditation to Life. This episode explores the above questions and additionally: The narcotic effect of war. How Buddhism helped Claude Anshin be at peace with what he calls his own unpeacefulness, and yet, why, to this day, he has to reckon with his impulse towards violence. Why he doesn't believe there is such a thing as a "just war." Content Warning: There are discussions of war, violence, suicide, and substance abuse throughout this episode. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/claude-anshin-thomas-427

Venerable Pannavati is a former evangelical pastor who has been ordained in three separate Buddhist traditions: Theravada, Chan, and Mahayana. She's the co-founder and co-Abbot of Embracing-Simplicity Hermitage and Meditation Center; Co-Director of Heartwood Refuge and President of the Treasure Human Life Foundation. She teaches around the world, was a 2008 recipient of the Outstanding Buddhist Women's Award, and currently serves as the Vice President of the US Chapter of the Global Buddhist Association. This episode explores: Why many meditators try to jump over important preliminary steps. Why Buddhism isn't necessarily fun or easy. The utility and impact of making vows. What Venerable Venerable Pannavati calls healthy shame. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/venerable-pannavati-430

We're now entering year three of the pandemic, and even though we're in a very different stage of the game, there are still so many questions: Is it safe or ethical to return to "normal"? How do you deal with people who have different views on safety and vaccines? What do you do if you're just bone tired of this whole mess? Today's guest is Lama Rod Owens, who was trained in the Kagyu School of Tibetan Buddhism, holds a Master of Divinity degree in Buddhist Studies from Harvard Divinity School, and is the author of the book Love and Rage: The Path of Liberation Through Anger. Lama Rod has been kind enough to come on to the show during moments of crisis. I spoke with him shortly after the murder of George Floyd and also during the 2020 elections. As you're about to hear, one of the core arguments he will make is that apocalypse (and he has a broad understanding of what that word means) can present an opportunity. This episode explores: The benefits of having an existing practice in times of heightened anxiety and uncertainty. Developing a direct, open relationship with fear. Working with regret. Why taking care of yourself is not selfish. Lama Rod's take on social media and watching TV as a way to reset. The obstacles to empathy. A more expansive definition of the word violence. A jarring New York Times article that posits that the recent rise in pedestrian deaths could be in part due to social erosion created by the pandemic. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/lama-rod-owens-427

As we enter year three of the pandemic, the psychology of COVID is no less complex or consequential. This episode features one of the most prominent chroniclers of the pandemic, David Leonhardt from the New York Times, who argues that there is irrationality on all sides when it comes to the pandemic. He would also urge you to consider whether you might be over or underestimating the risks of COVID, based on where you stand politically. This episode also explores: the state of play in the pandemic right now and where we may be headed next; why and how attitudes about the pandemic, at least here in the US, have sorted along partisan lines; whether it makes sense to be angry with the unvaccinated; how a rise in vehicle crashes might speak to how COVID accelerated the fraying of America's social fabric; and David's argument for why history and human decency can be a source of optimism going forward. David will also respond to his vehement critics who argue that his emphasis on lifting COVID restrictions and returning to some semblance of normalcy callously disregards the needs of the immunocompromised and unvaccinated. David Leonhardt is a senior writer for The New York Times. He writes The Morning, The Times's flagship daily newsletter, and also writes for the Sunday Review section. He has worked at The Times since 1999 and has previously been an Op-Ed columnist, Washington bureau chief, co-host of "The Argument" podcast, founding editor of The Upshot section and a staff writer for The Times Magazine. In 2011, he received the Pulitzer Prize for commentary. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/david-leonhardt-426

Dr. Paul Gilbert OBE is a professor of psychology at the University of Derby, Founder and President of The Compassionate Mind Foundation, the founder of Compassion Focused Therapy, and in 2011 was awarded the Officer of the British Empire, or OBE, from Queen Elizabeth II for his continued contribution to mental healthcare. He's also the author of several books including The Compassionate Mind, Living Like Crazy, Overcoming Depression, and his latest, Compassion Focused Therapy: Clinical Practice and Applications. This episode explores: What Compassion Focused Therapy actually is. Why he says wisdom and courage are key to compassion. Some surprising truths about your inner critic. How compassion can be used to your advantage, especially if you're ambitious. The relevance of various meditation practices to cultivating compassion. How trauma can impact our ability to access compassion, and what we might do about it. The importance of the vagus nerve and its relationship to compassion, mindfulness, and friendship. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/paul-gilbert-425

A common denominator among all of the great meditation teachers is a sense of humor. They take the teaching seriously, but they don't take themselves seriously. So perhaps there's a link between human flourishing and humor. That's not to say you have to be hilarious in order to be happy, but it clearly helps a great deal not to take yourself so seriously. And it turns out that humor is a skill. Jennifer Aaker and Naomi Bagdonas co-teach a course at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, called, "Humor: Serious Business." They also co-authored a book called, Humor, Seriously: Why Humor Is a Secret Weapon in Business and Life (and How Anyone Can Harness It. Even You.) Dr. Jennifer Aaker is the General Atlantic Professor at the Stanford Graduate School of Business whose work has been published in leading scientific journals and featured in The Economist, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic, and Science. Naomi Bagdonas is a lecturer at the Stanford Graduate School of Business and an executive coach. She trained formally at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre, teaches improv in San Francisco's county jail, and performs in comedy venues. This episode explores: Why Naomi and Jennifer say we've fallen off a humor cliff The four main humor styles and how to figure out which is yours When self-deprecation works, and when it doesn't How to conduct a humor audit How to sign off your emails The relationship between humor and status The connection between humor and love A taxonomy of workplace humor The different types of humor fails, and what to do about them Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/jennifer-aaker-naomi-bagdonas-423

We don't think about it this way, but as we move through the day, the various moods we inhabit — excitement, engagement, aggression, fear, dejection — they're all dictated by, or correlated with, our nervous system, or to be specific, our autonomic nervous system. The guest for this episode explains how you can become an active operator of your own nervous system. Deb Dana is a licensed clinical social worker, clinician, and consultant who specializes in working with complex trauma — although the advice in this episode can apply to everyone. She is also the author of Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory. This episode explores: What polyvagal theory is. The case for understanding our nervous system. The practical tools and exercises for changing our nervous system and learning to become more regulated. The fact that our nervous systems aren't simply isolated, self-contained phenomena – they are social structures. Our responsibilities for our own nervous system and the nervous systems of others. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/deb-dana-424

Today's guest makes an extremely convincing case that there are many self-interested reasons to look squarely at the reality of climate change. Bhikkhu Anālayo, who is originally from Germany, is a renowned scholar-monk, a faculty member at the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies and the author of numerous books on meditation and early Buddhism, including Satipatthāna: The Direct Path to Realization, which has been very influential with many of the teachers you've heard on this show, including Joseph Goldstein. This episode focuses on another of his books, called Mindfully Facing Climate Change. This episode explores: The four types of meditation Anālayo recommends for mindfully confronting climate change Anālayo's contention that meditation isn't about ceasing the flow of thoughts, but rather ceasing our belief in the thoughts The question of whether individual actions matter in the face of a global crisis Anālayo's compelling case for a kind of practice called death contemplation Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/bhikku-anālayo-422