Zen Pop

Cathy and Todd talk Christmas, getting parts stolen off their car, Todd’s inability to say he is sick, and Cathy’s night out at the B96 Jingle Bash with Jason Derulo and Enrique Iglesias. They also pose the question, why is December the only month we feel so giving and connected? Why can’t we take the holiday spirit year round?

Why do some parents make their kids sit on Santa’s lap? Are your holidays chaotic? Cathy and Todd want to know why….do you feel like you have to go to the cookie exchange and you have to see Santa? Instead of the have-tos, celebrate the season YOUR way! They also discuss the importance of being present for the season and for the gift opening. Todd decides he wants to “control” gift opening this year, but Cathy doesn’t agree. How do you manage the craziness of gift-giving?

Todd & Cathy have seen infants and toddlers being taken to movies like The Dark Knight, Breaking Dawn and other adult-themed shows. Todd’s reaction caught Cathy by a bit of a surprise. Is your reaction different? Cathy’s latest Chicago Parent blog has more, but from her perspective. Chicago Tribune’s John Kass thinks ZP Radio’s partner Poofin is a “stupid” toy…..we don’t think he understands the purpose! It’s more than just a pillow, it’s a scrapbook, it’s a conversation piece, it’s a comfort toy…..we love what Poofin has to offer – it allows children to recognize what they love and what they feel and it allows them to share themselves with others – what could be better? Need a great holiday gift for an expecting parent, a new parent, an experienced parent or a grandparent? Purchase Cathy’s “Self-Aware Parent Gift Set” – it includes both of her books signed, a white blank journal, an angel ornament, and it’s wrapped and ready to give…and it’s only $25! Click here to purchase.

Pizza is a vegetable? You heard it right, at least according to our lawmakers. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/david-katz-md/pizza-vegetable_b_1114027.html Todd finally vents about Congress and their misguided motivation regarding a news story that came out and his new idol Dylan Ratigan. See why @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlSd9OURbCE How does Cathy reacts to getting flipped off during a moment in traffic? She turns into a duck. Remember the ducks and what we can learn from them. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwK-FYx58to What’s to blame for Todd stomach ache? A plateful of Howard Stern.

Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of gratitude – for the week of Thanksgiving and for the entire year. They also discuss the truth behind anger, how to handle our children’s disrespectful or defiant behavior, and how to stay parental rather than resort to kid-like behavior.

Today on Zen Parenting Radio Todd and Cathy discuss the Penn State scandal, Cathy’s latest Chicago Parent blog, and how to keep our children emotionally safe. It’s time to focus on what we CAN do – it doesn’t help to be fearful or untrusting – instead, we can open up communication in the home by respecting our children’s instincts and respecting what they have to say. We need to listen more and talk less.

Cathy and Todd discuss the difference between loving yourself and being vain as discussed in Cathy’s latest Chicago Parent blog. There’s also some tensions as Todd’s been walking out of the room mid discussion with Cathy. Is it multi-tasking or rude? Tune in and find out.  

Today on Zen Parenting Radio – are you looking for love, grace, and peace? You don’t need to look outside of yourself, it already lives in your heart! Todd and Cathy discuss Cathy’s most recent Chicago Parent blog about the power of our heart center – let’s embrace it and teach our kids to do the same!

Cathy and Todd discuss forcing your children to apologize. Is there a better way to handle this? They discuss the balance between teaching manners as socially acceptable behavior vs using the situation as a teachable moment and to go a little deeper. You could read about it in her Chicago Parent blog as well.

Todd and Cathy discuss uncomfortable conversations and why they are so important – they focus on Cathy’s recent Chicago Parent blog….do we fight and pretend it didn’t happen, do we totally avoid, or do we handle disagreements with openness and bravery?

Todd and Cathy discuss the controversy surrounded Walter Payton and discuss Cathy’s new Chicago Parent blog titled Sweetness in Life: Lessons from Walter Payton – is he really “tainted” like the commentators say, or can we see him as a human being with flaws – aren’t we all? They discuss how parents need to embrace their flaws, how we all need to understand our “shadow” and they do a fantastic rendition of Kumbaya.

Todd and Cathy discuss Cathy’s article about Mindful Parenting in the October issue of Chicago Parent . They talk in depth about the 3 simple ideas (breathe, find quiet, smile) that lead to more calm, less chaos, and greater connection to the moment. Speaking of talking in depth – is your book club, bunko group or group of friends interested in talking deep about parenting, self awareness, or simply enjoying life? Contact Cathy at www.cathycassaniadams.com or [email protected] – she can run a discussion group right in the privacy of your home! And if you are looking for the perfect gift for a birthday party, check out www.poofin.com – it’s a wonderfully unique gift that allows children to communicate who they are – it’s also a comforting and cuddly toy for every night or overnights. Movie line –”I am a golden god. And you could tell Rolling Stone Magazine my last words were… I’m on drugs!!!!

Praise is great, but what are you praising? Is it the end result or the effort? Todd and Cathy discuss praise and how to influence a child’s desire to aim higher instead of lower. Big talks about homework, test scores, and reaching for the stars…..

Do you notice that your child likes to follow and listen to other people? Do you wish your child would be more of a leader? Today Cathy and Todd discuss why children “conform”, why this makes parents so uncomfortable, and how to view being a “follower” in a different way. Poofin.com – get your favorite picture and customize a charm! Go to the “Poofin Factory” and watch the Poofin be made…it’s worth a look! Movie line -“I had no idea you could milk a cat.” “Oh yeah- you could milk anything with nipples.” “I have nipples Greg- could you milk me?”

Supporting our children when they are afraid Does it make your uncomfortable when your children are afraid? Do you find yourself telling them to stop being afraid rather than comforting them when they need it most? Listen today as Todd and Cathy discuss children’s fear and anxiety and how we can deal with it in an effective and compassionate way. Poofin.com Don’t forget to use our coupon code “zencharm” Movie quote – “’Over’? Did you say ‘over’? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell, no!”

Todd and Cathy discuss why kids have tantrums and how to look at them differently…..instead of feeling out of control, can we feel compassion and understanding? And really, adults have tantrums, too, we just call them by a different name, like feeling “impatient”, “stressed” or “overwhelmed”. Cathy and Todd also discuss how to avoid tantrums (adult and child!) by discussing and processing feelings in the home.

Todd and Cathy discuss miscarriage, share their own personal experiences and focus on the need for grieving, healing and supporting each other through this kind of loss. They also discuss how giving birth is viewed as a “medical issue” rather than a natural process and highly recommend the documentary The Business of Being Born. Movie quote: Give a different line from the same movie via facebook and enter to win a free book… “What is it?” “It’s a gun rack.” “A gun rack… a gun rack. I don’t even own “a” gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do… with a gun rack?” “You don’t like it? Fine. You know Wayne, if you’re not careful, you’re going to lose me.” “I lost you 2 months ago. We broke up. Are you mental? Get the net!”

A birth plan is a great idea, but can you really “plan” how your children are born? Cathy and Todd talk about their birth stories, their thoughts regarding natural birth, and they share life lessons learned through the birth process….

Quit telling your kids how great the school year is going to be….if they feel anxious, let them be anxious! They don’t need you to tell them how great it’s going to be, they just need your support and validation. Instead of telling your kids how to feel, let them to you how they feel and know that with your love, they will work through it. AND, Todd gets deep about attending an American Idol concert with this dad….things were a little pitchy Dawg!

Do you find yourself agonizing over the past or worrying about what could happen in the future? Do you wish you could be more present for your children instead of always thinking about “what if”? You are not alone. Listen as Todd and Cathy discuss what it means to be here now and how to practice mindfulness in our everyday parenting experiences. Parenting Resource of the week – Kandle Kidswear (www.kandlekidswear.com) – a local and sustainable company using American Apparel organic shirts and sew on appliques made from recycled plastic bottles – cute and fun shirts for kids. Movie line – “Give me my Firebird keys.” “You must chill. You must chill. I have hidden your Keys… Chil!l” “I love you man.” “Allright, I love you too. go to sleep.” “We’re full on buds.”  

In this episode Cathy and Todd ask each other deep questions and surprise each other with their answers….it’s a great way to keep a partnership interesting! You can also use questions (from the book “If”) with your children…..stay connected and build relationships through question asking. Click here to learn more about Cathy’s Book Release Open House! http://www.cathycassaniadams.com/book-signing Movie quote – “It ain’t show friends, it’s show business.”

Are you a knit picker? Do you point out flaws in the hope that it will lead to change? If you really want to see a change, start pointing out the strengths…..as they say, what you focus on grows! Listen as Todd and Cathy discuss how to improve relationships by being a cheerleader rather than a nitpicker. Parenting Resource of the week – Parent2ParentU Facebook Page and website – https://www.facebook.com/pages/Parent2ParentU/364139551483 Abbreviated Movie line – “The space goes … downtown baby … ” (got to listen to the show to get the full effect)  

What are your children really trying to say?   Do your children use swear words or use strong language like “hate” or “kill”? Todd and Cathy discuss what your children are really trying to convey…..can we help them find different ways to express how they feel or appropriately ask for what they need? Parenting resource of the week – Pagatim.fm! Check out all the great podcasts on Pagatim (www.pagatim.fm)…..Parenting Unplugged, Dads Unplugged, Single Parents, Luvmour Family Relationships, Transforming Diabetes, Hybrid Life, and Launchpad Radio….so much great information for conscious families! Movie quote of the week – Life moves pretty fast- if you don’t stop and look around once in awhile- you might miss it.

Today Todd and Cathy talk about the “weird one”, the “emotional one” or the “truth teller” in the family – as parents can we be more accepting of our children’s differences, traits, and difficulties? Is something really wrong with them or do we need to find new ways to understand, appreciate and connect? Parenting resource of the week: Cultivating Radiance by Tamara Gerlach…..all about finding your inner radiance and sharing it with others. Beautiful stories, quotes, and suggestions that guide you to your highest potential. Check out www.tamaragerlach.com Movie quote of the week, “go get your shine box.”  

Video Games- The supreme court just said that any kid any age can purchase any game they want. What’s your take? Is there a difference b/w Space Invaders and Grand Theft Auto? How to use video games to your parental advantage Like what you heard? Have Cathy present to your group- more info can be found @ http://www.cathycassaniadams.com/speaking-presentations Parent Resource of the week- Looking to get family pictures taken? Look no further http://cherylpacyna.zenfolio.com/ Last but not least- listen to Todd’s best Schwarzenegger impersonation

Why are so many children diagnosed with disorders and given powerful medications that may not even be necessary? Listen as Todd and Cathy discuss the epidemic of over diagnoses and how parents can be more aware of what is indeed “normal”. They reference this recent article in Newsweek – http://www.newsweek.com/2011/06/19/mommy-am-i-really-bipolar.html And their “parent resource of the week” is Square One Organics (www.squareoneorganics.com), frozen organic superfoods for babies and kids.

Todd and Cathy discuss FOOD, our conflicting emotions about food, why it can be difficult to feed our kids. As parents we need to understand how we feel about food so we can pass on a positive message to our children. It’s time to get smart about eating and let go of the guilt! Food is our first line of defense when it comes to health, but it should also be a pleasurable experience. How do we do this? Listen today! Also check out our Parent Resource of the week Siv Sjöholm Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/pages/Success-Is-Vitality/151492724868603 Website www.SuccessIsVitality.com    

What are the top 5 deathbed regrets? Listen to this show and learn…..just a hint, most of them are about enjoying the moment, “being” instead of “doing” and choosing happiness over stress. Simple, right? Then why doesn’t everybody live this way? Listen as Cathy and Todd discuss the way to really integrate this wisdom and change your life for the better. Check out our parenting resource of the week – Soul to Soul Parenting: A Guide to Raising a Spiritually Conscious Family by Annie Burnside – www.annieburnside.com Want Cathy’s new book? Go to www.cathycassaniadams.com or Amazon.com….it’s called The Self-Aware Parent Two: 23 More Lessons for Growing with Your Children…..buy Cathy’s first and second book for only $20 at www.cathycassaniadams.com/buy-the-self-aware-parent-books

Cathy and Todd discuss the breastfeeding-in-public controversy and talk about the laws and issues surrounding nursing. There are varying opinions about breastfeeding based on personal history, experiences, and access to current information….Cathy and Todd challenge you to have respectful discussions about this issue – listening and learning is the key to normalizing this often contentious subject. To pre-order Cathy’s new book, The Self-Aware Parent Two: 23 More Lessons for Growing with Your Children, click here – www.cathycassaniadams.com Ask Cathy to come to talk to your book club, organization, or just gather a group of friends at your house….let’s discuss self care, parenting, and how to enjoy life to the fullest! Contact Cathy at [email protected] or click here for more information – www.cathycassaniadams.com/speaking-presentations

What do YOU want? Cathy and Todd discuss why it’s important to let go of the way your family did things. Be open to what your partner brings to the table and create a family based on what works best for both of you. Getting married and having children is another stage of development….your relationships with your family of origin (and inlaws) will change, but you can still remain loving, grateful, and connected.  

Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of allowing for pain, sadness, and grief, and how to be the best possible listener for your kids and other loved ones. If you or your family is dealing with crisis, divorce, death, or just overall challenges, this show is for you.  

Listen as Todd and Cathy share their pet peeves and then discover new and more positive ways to view these annoyances. Cathy finds some strengths, but Todd is challenged to understand the concept. They continue to discuss that everything can viewed differently and that sometimes the most difficult issues (your daughter is bossy and stubborn) can have a different viewpoint (she is a natural leader who won’t be swayed by peer pressure because she knows how to hold her ground).  

Are you stuck in old patterns and fearful of what’s ahead? Cathy and Todd encourage you to be present in the moment and go with the flow….life is exciting and constantly flowing, so learn to flow with it. This is especially important as your children grow and change…will you stay stuck, or will you allow them to evolve?

Fear is normal. It’s normal for children to be afraid. Instead of telling them to not be afraid, let’s help them find tools to deal with their fear. Speaking of fear, Todd scared his daughter when he dressed up as Cookie Monster….his intentions were good, but it didn’t quite work out the way he planned…… Here’s the link to Cathy’s blog that we mention on the show – http://www.chicagoparent.com/community/the-self-aware-parent/2011/march/let%27s-be-clear—what-do-we-really-want-for-our-children  

Have you really thought about what you want for your children, or are you letting society tell you what’s important? Cathy and Todd encourage listeners to focus on children’s emotional intelligence as well as their book skills, and they reference the movie Race to Nowhere. Creativity, play, and downtime are just as important as study time. They also suggest why reading to your child may not always be the best idea. And speaking of, Todd decides to make fun of Cathy for not playing board games….. “play” means something different to everyone, so is this justified? Listen and find out! BTW, Mother’s Day is coming up. Make it easy on yourself and buy an autographed copy of Cathy’s book- “The Self Aware Parent- 19 Lessons For Growing With Your Children” We’ll even gift wrap it for you. Click on the link to purchase and check Mother’s Day off your list.

Remember in the movie Field of Dreams when Kevin Costner’s character said to his father “Dad, You Want To Have A Catch?” What a beautiful moment. But might we make a small suggestion? Don’t be that Dad! Don’t force your son to kidnap a famous writer, nearly watch you daughter choke to death on a hot dog and cut down a corn crop to make a baseball field all after you are dead – Learn to stay connected now! Cathy and Todd challenge you to be creative and take the lead on staying connected – don’t forget, you are the parent in the relationship! Ok, so Cathy and I started talking about this and it turned into an argument of which is the best baseball movie b/w Field of Dreams/Bull Durham/Major League. Listen in and let us know where you stand on the baseball movie argument.

“Money isn’t real,” said Ray Liotta in the movie Blow. But if it’s not real, then what is it? Cathy and Todd think it’s another opportunity for awareness and communication within the relationship – with your partner and with your children. Are you modeling a healthy relationship with money for your children? Do your children experience boundaries when it comes to stuff, or do they get whatever they want?

Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of parenting from the heart instead of staying stuck in the head. They talk about “monkey mind” and how our brain continuously processes information and messages without our consent. The question is, are these messages helping or hurting you and your family? Can you bring heart and head together and parent from a highly conscious and grounded place? Listen today to find out!

Todd shares some piano music (only 2 lessons!), Cathy and Todd share the deeper lessons behind their physical limitations, and they decide that if they had to be a Seinfeld character, they would be Putty.

Cathy and Todd remind you to take care of yourself, let go of the nagging, and practice what you preach. Stop trying to change the people in your life and focus on yourself….live consciously and be a role model for the people you love.  

Cathy and Todd challenge you to discover your dreams and do live your life to the fullest. It will make you happier, and it’s great role modeling for your children.  

Cathy and Todd share how they deal with challenges – from everyday issues to the grief of their own miscarriage. They remind us that we can’t escape difficulty, but we can find new ways to cope.

Do you think this is bad parenting or smart parenting? Are you a helicopter parent? Do you hover around your child and buffer all of their challenges? Cathy and Todd recommend occasionally stepping aside to allow your children to struggle, but they also suggest being fully available and supportive through the recovery.

Before talking to your kids about sex, you better know how you feel about it. Cathy and Todd share their views, but they challenge you to figure out what is best for your family. PS – If you don’t talk to your kids about sex, you may need to listen to the show that precedes us- Parenting Unplugged Radio on Pagatim.fm. They talk to the author of “Get Me Out: a history of childbirth from the Garden of Eden to the Sperm Bank” – It’s scary, hilarious and quite eye opening.

Or how about, “I don’t want to talk about it”. Why do our kids say mean things and why don’t they want to talk to us? Listen as Cathy and Todd discuss the way our children communicate and how we can respond with more love and understanding. Actually, just listen to hear Todd’s impersonation of Yoda…..this wise old Jedi is an Adams’ family favorite.

…and Cathy’s idea of a big night out is going to Chipolte and talking about emotions – does this sound romantic to you? You might be surprised…listen as Todd and Cathy share their feelings about Valentine’s Day, being spontaneous, and making your relationship a priority.

Maybe Todd doth protest too much or maybe it’s that’s he’s got a great wife in Cathy. But in this episode you will hear why she should be kicking him into the doghouse and why it should have cost more than just a foot massage to get him back inside. On the flip side, Todd and Cathy do discuss why women should stop doing that. You know what I mean. That. They always do it and won’t let a man do it. Why not? Are you confused? Let these two straighten you out.  

On Tuesday’s show Cathy and Todd talked about their favorite tv/movie dad. What do you think? Who are your favorites? Feel free to share…… Mac MacGuff – Juno Steven Keaton – Family Ties Jackie Elliot – Billy Elliot Jack Arnold – Wonder Years Atticus Finch – To Kill a Mocking Bird Reply below

Who couldn’t use a good tantrum? Today, Cathy and Todd talked about the importance of allowing for feelings and talking about feelings with your kids – especially uncomfortable feelings like anger and sadness. And tantrums are not just for kids…..Cathy said that when she feels strong emotion she yells at the ocean – or an expressway if an ocean isn’t available….. A few of Cathy’s events mentioned on today’s show…. Zen Parenting class at Elmhurst Yoga Shala Parent University in Batavia, IL

How do we communicate if we don’t speak the same language? On the second installment of Zen Parenting Radio, Todd and Cathy discuss the differences between how men and women communicate and how understanding this leads to healthier relationships and a healthier family. Todd also tries to convince Cathy that watching the commercial-free Red Zone channel is good for their marriage, while Cathy tries to convince Todd that in-depth communication during lunch is good for their marriage – can they both be right? Click here to sign up for the Zen Parenting Class that Cathy mentioned at the end of the show – pre-registration only! http://www.yogashalakids.org/workshops.html