Therapist Uncensored Podcast

What did Bowlby mean by “internal working model” and how true did it turn out to be? While it is mostly unconscious, our internal working models play a role in how we navigate our relationships with ourselves and others. Co-hosts Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott use neuroscience and personal narratives to help make this science digestible and applicable in our daily lives. “Internal working models are not a metaphor – they’re a real thing.” – Sue Marriott Time Stamps for Internal Working Model 5:53 – Definition of internal working model 9:58 – Most of the internal working model is unconscious 18:39 – Explanation of the term “wired in” 20:59 – Understanding how our brains are able to change and grow 28:50 – Recognizing dismissive characteristics 37:02 – Encouraging secure relating 43:50 – Sneak peek at TU updates and future episodes Resources for Internal Working Model Strange Situation – Mary Ainsworth Internal Working Model – John Bowlby View the transcripts for Internal Working Models with Ann & Sue here We support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare and use a portion of the income we receive from corporate sponsors to do just that! We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed and unique study opportunities. Click here to join!   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player and/or share this episode with someone you think could use the quality content of the show!

Pause to add consciousness to your next intention. As a certified Neonatal Therapist, Sue Ludwig has dedicated her life to not only the physical development but the emotional development of her patients. Ludwig brings intentionality to each moment by strategically working to regulate patients’ nervous systems during their time in the NICU. Her process focuses on the interconnection of the mind and body and aims to support the child’s development in vulnerable situations. She explains the importance of proper technique to avoid disrupting the nervous system and the long-term effects on neurodevelopment. Through her personal and professional journeys, Sue Ludwig has learned the value of being present in small moments to build deeper connections and experience lasting results. “Humans are different in that we’re meant to co-regulate, we are meant to be with a parent or adult. The way that we show up as parents and how calm we are – the better the babies are able to absorb our presence.” Time Stamps for “What Tiny Humans Can Teach Us About Adult Relating, with Sue Ludwig (197)” 1:11 – What do we mean by energy 6:05 – The power of bringing intention to energy 10:36 – Regulating babies’ nervous systems 14:09 – Properly performing the “hand hug” when holding small babies 17:58 – A proper “hand hug” for a more developed baby 20:50 – Importance of connection between the child and parent 21:38 – The “hand hug” technique for a full-term baby 27:54 – Co-regulation from the parent’s perspective 30:52 – Sue’s personal introduction to intentionality 42:31 – Embracing that development is never-ending Resources for Sue Ludwig’s Website National Association of Neonatal Therapists (NANT) American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA) National Coalition for Infant Health (NCFIH) Hope for HIE – Website   About our expert guest, Sue Ludwig Sue Ludwig is passionate about improving the quality of life for infants who begin their journey in the NICU, and the professionals who serve them. She is a sought-after speaker, consultant, and writer. A licensed occupational therapist and certified neonatal therapist, she is president and founder of the National Association of Neonatal Therapists (NANT), where she uses a blend of clinical expertise, innovation, and leadership to support the advancement of this specialized field on a global level. Sue is the media expert in neonatal therapy for the American Occupational Therapy Association, a member of the steering committee for the National Coalition for Infant Health, and a medical advisory board member for Hope for HIE. She has received the Laura Edmunds Lectureship Award from UMass Memorial Medical Center, the Individual Contribution to Maternal and Child Health Award from the National Perinatal Association, and the Alumni Professional Achievement Award from Eastern Kentucky University. She has also been named a Graham’s Foundation Resilience Honoree. Sue’s book Tiny Humans, Big Lessons was published in March of 2022. Today, Sue lives in Cincinnati, Ohio, with her husband and a few dogs, and has two grown children. Click here to view this episode’s transcripts We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.   Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – please do support them to support us! With HelloFresh, you get farm-fresh, pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep. Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh to make home cooking easy, fun, AND affordable – that’s why it’s America’s #1 meal kit! Go to HelloFresh.com/tu21 for 21 free meals plus free shipping! Calm helps you stress less, sleep more and live a happier, healthier life. Their guided meditations, sleep stories, relaxing music tracks, and daily movement sessions are all designed to give you the tools to improve the way you feel. Over 100 million people around the world use Calm. Even if you’ve never meditated before, you’ll get the support you need to reduce stress, improve focus, and uplift your mood. If you go to Calm.com/TU, you’ll get a special offer of 40% off a Calm Premium Subscription, and new content is added every week. Dipsea is an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. They bring scenarios to life with immersive soundscapes and realistic characters. Discover stories about second-chance romances, adventurous vacation flings, and hot and heavy hookups. Radically inclusive, Di

Elizabeth A. Stanley, Ph.D., is an associate professor of security studies at Georgetown University and the creator of Mindfulness-Based Mind Fitness Training (MMFT)®, taught to thousands in civilian and military high-stress environments. In 2019, Dr. Stanley published “Widen the Window: Training your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recovering from Trauma” – a highly praised resource known for providing tools to heal and thrive. We are replaying this discussion we shared with Dr. Stanley in early 2022 as a reminder of the power of expanding our windows of tolerance and building resiliency. To check out the original show notes for Elizabeth Stanley’s episode, click here!   Resources related to Elizabeth Stanley Ph.D.’s Episode Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s Website “Widen the Window: Training Your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recover from Trauma” – Purchase “Mindfulness-Based Mind-Fit Training” – Online Courses “Optimizing the Caveman Within Us” – Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s TedTalk Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!

Contact Bolte-Taylor to find out how her work is being applied and sign up for certification. Since this podcast first aired, Sue Marriott worked with a very small group of people with Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor in the first round of Whole Brain Living certification. Contact Jill Bolte-Taylor to find out how to participate. Learn about 4 major characters (skill sub-sets) in your mind as a way to understand neuroanatomy and how to best use the power of your whole mind. NOTE: For our private Neuronerd community, don’t forget to check out the deep dive series on Whole Brain Living. Join to access it for as little as $5 a month at www.therapistuncensored.com/join. Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor is a Harvard-trained neuroanatomist who suffered a stroke that led her on a path to rediscovering her brain. At the end of 2021, we had the privilege of discussing the inner workings of the mind with Dr. Bolte Taylor. We thought this was the perfect episode to kick off the new year, full of eye-opening insights that could help improve the way you live your life.   To check out the original show notes for Jill Bolte-Taylor’s episode, click here! RESOURCES: Check out her TED Talk, My Stroke of Insight (join the inspiration of 28 million viewers!) How to do a Brain Huddle by Jill Bolte-Taylor. Free Webinar Series and Contact Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor HERE Hear more psychology and neuroscience in previous episodes: Episode 93 Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Stephen Porges Episode 110 Story Follows State (more polyvagal theory) with Deb Dana Episode 117 Resilience Trauma and the Brain with Dr. Bruce Perry Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!

Earlier this year, we had the privilege of speaking with Loretta J. Ross, a world-renowned human-rights activist. In 2022, she was acknowledged by the MacArthur Foundation for her dedication to social justice, human rights, and reproductive justice. As a well-deserving recipient, we couldn’t think of a better episode to close out the year. The holidays can sometimes feel draining and the tension from familial relationships can take a toll. Loretta J. Ross’s words of wisdom and “calling in” are a great extra resource during the season. View her MacArthur Foundation Award here Check out our original show notes for this episode, here!   And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Instagram, Youtube, Facebook, & Twitter! We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Supercast premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper insights into select content, and unique study opportunities. Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Many answers to our challenges are already inside of us. In today’s episode, find new perspectives on how culture and trauma affect our navigation within the world. Using bottom-up approaches, she explains how addictions are regulation strategies and provides tools to deeper connect to our nervous systems and ourselves. Join social workers Sue Marriott and Jan Winhall as they explore Winhall’s “felt sense” model, where she blends neuroception and interoception through a polyvagal lens. Jan Winhall is a highly experienced therapist and author who has dedicated her life to understanding and challenging dominant structures. From her years of group therapy and studying with figures like Dr. Stephen Porges, she has combined her findings into her recent book Treating Trauma and Addiction with the Felt Sense Plyvagal Model: A Bottom-Up Approach. “Felt sense is all about the capacity in the body to notice what we’re experiencing and to carry us forward in the direction of healing and growth.” – Jan Winhall About Jan Winhall Jan Winhall, MSW, FOT is an author, teacher, and psychotherapist. She is an adjunct lecturer in the Department of Social Work at the University of Toronto. She is the director of Focusing on Borden, a psychotherapy and training center. Jan presents internationally on trauma and addiction. You can find many resources for both clinicians and clients on her website, including videos, PDFs (see below) and training opportunities. Time Stamps for the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model 3:47 – Tying the autonomic nervous system to addiction 6:02 – Breaking down bottom-up processing 8:13 – The relationship between interoception and neuroception 14:17 – Rethinking the term “sex addiction” 18:46 – Neuroception temperature example 21:16 – Introducing the intervening variable 27:53 – The six F’s and their branches 36:01 – The learning model of addiction 41:34 – Winhall’s perspective on polyvagal theory Resources for the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model Treating Addiction & Trauma Together – Youtube Video Trauma and Recovery – Book by Judith Herman Jan Winhall Models 6 F’s client and clinician version Revolutionizing Addiction Treatment with The Felt Sense Polyvagal Model – Article International Body Psychotherapy Journal Jan Winhall Website The Conspiracy of Silence – Book by Sandra Butler The Politics of Giving Therapy – Eugene T. Gendlin, Ph.D. Stephen W. Porges, Ph.D. – Website Doug Braun-Harvey, Fellowship in Sexual Compulsive Behavior – Website Focusing on Borden – Jan Winhall             Other Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu18-polyvagal-theory-understanding-irrational-threat-responses-in-relationships/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu93-polyvagal-theory-in-action-the-practice-of-body-regulation-with-dr-stephen-porges/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu94-the-science-of-self-regulation-breaking-down-polyvagal-theory/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu110-story-follows-state-investigating-polyvagal-theory-with-guest-deb-dana/ CLICK here for Jan Winhall Transcripts – Episode 192 We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper insights into select content, and unique study opportunities. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!

Discipline is about teaching, not punishment. Children are sponges. They are constantly soaking up information about themselves, their relationships and their future. And parents are the most powerful influences on these messages, so what we do really matters. Knowing this, sometimes we double down on trying to assert our wisdom, hammer a point home, or stop an unwanted behavior in it’s tracks. After all, we want to raise kids who are kind, responsible, caring, and independent. The trouble is, if we are acting out of fear, being fueled by anger and reactivity, it’s likely we aren’t having the impact we truly desire. For kids to learn, they need to feel emotionally safe and cognitively open. For this to happen, parents need to start by cultivating their own self-awareness and emotion management. In today’s episode, learn powerful strategies for parenting even during the most difficult moments. Ann Kelley, Kat Scherer and Elizabeth Sylvester discuss ways of integrating attachment and neurobiology into disciplinary styles that work and build balance in our relationships. Throughout the episode, Dr. Scherer and Dr. Sylvester highlight some of their most effective parenting strategies discussed in their recent book, Relationship-Based Treatment of Children & Their Parents: An Integrative Guide to Neurobiology, Attachment, Regulation, and Discipline. Specifically, they dive deep into the “7 Essential Attachment Needs” for children’s optimal development, emphasize the importance of repair in relationships, and discuss the building blocks of secure parenting. “When limits are set firmly, but kindly, this fuels healing in the attachment relationship.” – Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester Time Stamps for Relationship-based treatment 1:05 – Breaking down the title of their book, “Relationship-Based Treatment of Children & Their Parents” 4:43 – The integration between attachment and discipline 8:52 – Finding balance with a high-intense child 11:31 – Rethinking the way we view dysregulation 16:38 – The 7 essential attachment needs 24:58 – Recognizing the importance of “the repair” 35:47 – Discipline is learning 39:08 – The effects of “fear-based” discipline 45:08 – The role of “novelty and play” 51:49 – The power in empowered parenting Resources for Relationship-based treatment Relationship-Based Treatment – Youtube Channel Website Link – Relationship-Based Treatment The Nurtured Heart Institute – Website for the Nurtured Heart Approach mindGAINS – Website for the Global Association for Interpersonal Neurobiology Studies Dr. Elizabeth A. Sylvester – Website Dr. Kathy Scherer – Website About Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester & Dr. Kat Scherer Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester is a Psychologist and Educator working with children, parents, and families in Austin Texas for over 30 years. She is a practitioner of the Nurtured Heart Approach ®, and has completed advanced training in this system. Her specialty is providing parent training and child psychotherapy for children and teens who are highly behaviorally and emotionally intense. In addition to her clinical work, Dr. Sylvester facilitates training for professionals and the public on parenting, and child and adolescent psychotherapy. She has a particular focus on the interaction of relationships and neurobiological development with mental health and behavior. She has presented in a variety of settings including universities, professional organizations, mental health agencies, and community organizations. In collaboration with Dr. Kathy Scherer (a founder of Austin IN Connection), she created the Heart & Work series of writings, presentations, and workshops. Dr. Sylvester is a co-founder of Austin Child Therapy, an organization whose mission is to support the work of pediatric mental health professionals in Austin. Kathy (Kat) Scherer, Ph.D., MFT, C-IAYT is a Psychologist, Educator, and Author working in Austin for over 25 years. She is a psychotherapist in private practice and offers presentations on topics such as interpersonal neurobiology, family attachment, social-emotional development, and the application of yoga and meditation for stress management. Her presentations have been offered at a wide variety of settings including universities, professional conferences, community centers, and schools. Dr. Scherer is a co-founder of Austin IN Connection and its Family Matters program, both Austin area multidisciplinary organizations focused on emotional health and positive relational attachments. She co-hosts the Heart & Work Series of writings including two collaborative mental health blogs (with Drs. Holt & Sylvester): Therapy Matters and Heart & Work of Parenting. Episode Transcripts – 192 – Lightly edited for readability

The intersection of poverty and mental illness – intergenerational patterns that impact one another. Attachment ‘insecurity” is partly a manifestation of unresolved stress patterns in the child and, by extension, the family. Therapists usually think of stress as interpersonal and dyadic, but you can’t isolate individuals from context. We talk about context a lot when it comes to attachment – the circumstances or setting which helps to understand a process more deeply. As Sharon Lambert says in today’s episode, you can’t “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” if you have no boots. Sue Marriott and Sharon Lambert discuss the unconscious bootstraps communities have that cause blame towards those who are struggling. There is no doubt that poverty impacts physical and emotional health, and thus lifting children out of poverty is a direct intervention in their well-being. Today’s session also explores fascinating research on how people use mental health podcasts – join us! “We still have these perpetuating cycles – it’s not the cycle of addiction, it’s the cycle of trauma. It’s not the cycle of poverty, it’s the cycle of trauma. We have to start looking at systems and asking ‘how do we break these cycles?'” – Dr. Sharon Lambert Time Stamps for Poverty & Mental Health 1:05 – Poverty is one of the biggest predictors of depression 9:56 – The privilege of higher education 11:51 – Differing views of drug and alcohol use between the classes 22:06 – Cortisol levels of parenting in poverty 25:43 – Being aware of differing trauma responses 32:12 – Explanation of the “child benefit payment” in Ireland 39:18 – The risk, rewards & research of mental health podcasts 46:44 – Mental health podcast recommendations 1:00:58 – Trans community and mental health Resources for Poverty & Mental Health Dr. Sharon Lambert – UCC Research Profile & list of Studies Podcasts as a tool for enhancing mental health literacy: An investigation of mental health-related podcasts PDF of 2022 article cited “Her Dislike of the Words ‘Addict’ & ‘Clean'” – Youtube Video “Where the Light Enters” – Youtube Video The Blindboy Podcast – Episode The Two Norries – Podcast Twitter Profile About Dr. Sharon Lambert Dr. Sharon Lambert joined the teaching staff at the School of Applied Psychology in 2014 following a number of years working within community-based settings that provided support to marginalized groups. Sharon’s research interests revolve primarily around the impact of trauma on development, its link with substance dependence and mental health, and consequent considerations for service design and delivery. Sharon conducts research with community-based partners such as addiction, homelessness, criminal justice, and education organizations. The research looks at both primary psychological trauma (Adverse Childhood & Community Experiences) and secondary traumatic stress. The impact of trauma on well-being and outcomes is explored and the application of research and theory to service delivery is of significant interest. Sharon is a member of the Psychological Society of Ireland, Silent Voices Advisory Group and was appointed to the statutory Parole Board by the Minister for Justice. View the Transcripts Here – Dr. Sharon Lambert We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!

Navigate more securely no matter where you start. Learn to deepen interpersonal connections, heal trauma and even add enjoyment through secure relating! This podcast gives you truly deep dives into attachment and helpful tools to build comfort with intimacy. Is it possible to have unresolved trauma and still be operating securely in various relationships? Absolutely!! You don’t have to be totally healed from years of therapy under your belt or a history of secure attachment to develop skills for increased intimacy and secure relating. This is something that anybody, no matter their history, can begin to learn. Channeling your inner awareness to recognize a heightened state of arousal or using visualizations to help stay in a regulated place helps tap into your right brain to connect with yourself and your humanity. Ann and Sue navigate their personal examples, self-regulating tips, breaking out of their defensive “competitive head”, and many more useful strategies to explore the ways we can move in the direction of secure connections. “Even if you have a history that leads you to trend toward preoccupied, dismissive or avoidant relating, with effort and practice opening up you can learn to relate from a secure base.” – Dr. Ann Kelley Time Stamps for Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment 3:06 – Introduction to attachment patterns 8:53 – Acknowledging the fluctuation of the attachment spectrum 11:56 – The definition of secure relating 27:09 – Using visualizations as a regulation tactic 29:01 – Abandoning your “competitive head” 34:13 – Utilizing the word “bookmark” 37:36 – The importance of preparing yourself for tough conversations 40:45 – Implementing Gottman’s “soft starts” 42:45 – Navigating the coexistence of complex feelings Episode Resources for Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment “How to Fight Smarter: Soften Your Starts” – Gottman Institute Article Other Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/whole-brain-living-psychology-neuroanatomy-spirit-with-dr-jill-bolte-taylor-164/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/thrive-during-stress-172/ Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment Transcripts – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – support them to support us! $75 credit alert for our listeners! Ann and Sue aren’t tech-savvy so they appreciate how easy it is to use and navigate Indeed. It is the hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Find top talent fast with Indeed’s suite of powerful hiring tools like Instant Match, Assessments, and Virtual Interviews. Hate waiting? Indeed’s US data shows over 80% of Indeed employers find quality candidates, whose resume on Indeed matches their job description, the MOMENT they sponsor a job. Start hiring now with a seventy-five dollar sponsorship credit to post your job post at Indeed.com/therapistuncensored With MasterClass, you can learn from the world’s best minds – anytime, anywhere, and at your own pace. With over 150 classes from a range of world-class instructors, that thing you’ve always wanted to do is closer than you think. Get unlimited access to EVERY class, and as a Therapist Uncensored listener, you get 15% off an annual membership! Go to MasterClass.com/TU now. Interested in even more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.

Hair-pulling, skin picking, and cheek, lip, & cuticle biting are self-soothing strategies that depending on degree can become body-focused repetitive behavioral disorders. Learn about a new attachment-informed psychodynamic model for treating these painful, shame-associated behaviors. While we may not be fully aware when we are pulling and picking, these sorts of unconscious behaviors can be an indicator of dysregulation. Outside factors such as our environment, upbringing, and various traumas can all play a role in these self-soothing behaviors. Stacy Nakell has been an active researcher and pioneer in this field, and has dedicated years to understanding and educating others on how to abandon shame and treat these behaviors. By blending attachment theory and neurobiological research, Nakell has helped rewire the ways in which we navigate these behaviors and brought forward new perspectives like viewing BFRBDs on a continuum and how these overlap with body dysmorphic disorders. Stacy Nakell’s book Treatment for Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors is the first to establish the theory and practice of a psychodynamic approach to treating body-focused repetitive behavior disorders. Follow along as Sue and Stacy discuss the misconceptions, treatments, and science to better manage these behavioral patterns. Stacy Nakell wants to help us talk about these shame-filled experiences “It’s important to look from an in-depth perspective… to really get into the roots and understand what’s driving the behavior” – Stacy Nakell Time Stamps for Healing BFRBDs 2:02 – Introduction to trichotillomania 7:26 – When these behaviors are considered a “disorder” 9:36 – The role of shame in repetitive behavioral patterns 11:56 – Are BFRBD’s considered self-harm? 13:33 – The overlap with body dysmorphic disorders 17:36 – Correlation between grooming and BFRBDs 21:08 – Perfectionism’s influence on BFRBDS 22:54 – The role of aggression in BFRBDs 31:14 – Metaphor of the stress cup 41:28 – Analysis of “psychic skin” Resources for Healing BFRBDs Click here to purchase Treatment for Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors Stacy Nakell’s Website Stacy Nakell’s Blog Pop Culture Storyline Reference The TLC Foundation Zoobiguity – Barbara Natterson-Horowitz About Stacy Nakell Stacy Nakell is a psychotherapist in private practice in Austin, TX. For the past 20 years, she has worked with people who struggle with body-focused repetitive behaviors. Nakell is a Certified Group Psychotherapist and provides workshops and institutes locally with the Austin Group Psychotherapy Society and nationally with the American Group Psychotherapy Association.   We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities. Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – support them to support us! $75 credit alert for our listeners! Ann and Sue aren’t tech-savvy so they appreciate how easy it is to use and navigate Indeed. It is the hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Find top talent fast with Indeed’s suite of powerful hiring tools like Instant Match, Assessments, and Virtual Interviews. Hate waiting? Indeed’s US data shows over 80% of Indeed employers find quality candidates, whose resume on Indeed matches their job description, the MOMENT they sponsor a job. Start hiring now with a seventy-five dollar sponsorship credit to post your job post at Indeed.com/therapistuncensored Dipsea is an app that brings you socially responsible sexy stories made by and for those who identify as women. Women often have sexual trauma on top of hurtful cultural messaging around sexuality, so finding a new product that can safely reconnect you to an important essence of yourself is very positive. Dipsea promotes sexual and sensual health via imagination in a way that is safe, discreet, and respectful. Reconnect to parts of you that might have been neglected, find things you didn’t know you were into, or just gain more confidence in the bedroom, whether you have someone with you or not. Check it out totally free using our link – this gives you a full 30 days to explore what they are all about dipseastories.com/tu or just click HERE. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships. An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you thin

Do you have intimacy hiccups? Let’s find out. Ann and Sue were on a role w disarming defenses so while this one isn’t technically in that 5 part series, let’s call it a hanger-on. OK, an important question: how you make a tuna sandwich. We are sure your way is awesome but… Unless we think about it contextually, we believe our tuna technique is simply the “right” way. This is true relationally, so how do we recognize interpersonal assumptions that we’ve never examined when they just seem like they are true and right? When we make assumptions we literally don’t know we are doing it because it just seems true. While having assumptions can sometimes be considered a way to keep us safe, they also can be a strong influence on our “intimacy hiccups”. Assumptions block our view of seeing the whole perspective and equip us with a bias that can make our relationships difficult to navigate. Receiving feedback could become an assumption that you’re under attack or not worthy, and can heighten our defenses. Whether your “moral compass” may get in the way, your assumptions form from cultural influence, or you even feel avoidant of those tougher conversations and just assume the other person is on the same page – no matter which defense resonates with you, this episode will probably hit on something relevant for you. Ann and Sue challenge you to just reconsider so you can relate in the most mindful way possible and not accidentally project your way as the “right” way. “When you apologize… you’re not actually above or below the other person – you’re equal to the person. That’s what being truly empowered is, and that’s the assumption that we’re busting.” – Ann Kelley Time Stamps for Busting Assumptions – Episode 188 3:30 – Navigating “intimacy hiccups” 9:03 – The importance of dropping ego during feedback 10:10 – Healthy relating example in parenting 16:36 – Softening your front to allow uncertainty 19:34 – Roles of cultural differences in assumptions 25:42 – The power in knowing how & when to apologize CLICK HERE FOR BUSTING ASSUMPTIONS TRANSCRIPTS – Episode 188 – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities Good sleep is related to so many good health and mental health outcomes, but we don’t all have it easy when we try to fall asleep or stay asleep. Nighttime rituals are important, try a cup of hot cocoa before bed that tastes good and is full of wellness ingredients that will help you sleep. Beam includes 3rd party tested hemp free of THC, l-theanine, melatonin, and natural adaptogens to help your immunity. Get up to 40% off when you go to shopbeam.com/TU and use code TU at checkout.   Interested in more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight about interpersonal relating.

From navigating power dynamics to utilizing healthy aggression – this series covered many layers of our our natural defense systems. But how do we navigate something we don’t know is there? Ann and Sue are back with one final session to help shift our perspectives and disarm our defenses. This is the 5th episode in a series of 5. You can start anywhere but if you prefer to start at the beginning of the series click here for Session 1. Throughout this five-session series, we’ve explored different defenses, self-reflection, and navigation our own often unconscious internal protection systems. But how do we navigate something we aren’t aware of in the first place? In this episode, Ann and Sue recap the material we’ve learned and take a dive into suppression versus repression. Organizing defenses on a continuum can help us tap into our own emotions, and better regulate our responses to the triggers of the world. However, it is also important to detach the narrative of being “good and bad,” when it comes to our defenses, and recognize they are little parts of who we are that are constantly evolving. Whether it’s projection, appearing to be a “know it all”, power dynamics, ceding, or even being forgetful – we express our unconscious and conscious defenses in multiple ways. Join in exploring your own personal arsenal with curiosity and recognition of the care that drives it. “Some of these defenses are biological. Some are related to religion, culture – you name it. The stew that makes us human come to play in what we’re able to tolerate, take in, and allow ourselves to struggle with. When we can see it, we can then begin to reckon with it.” – Sue Marriott Time Stamps for Connecting with Your Subconscious – Episode 187 7:44 – Understanding the hierarchy of defense 8:22 – Reviewing the primitive defenses 8:49 – Suppression vs repression 14:55 – The role of “splitting” in our self-image 16:47 – Why healthy denial is essential 20:44 – Recognizing defenses are not black and white 28:24 – “Forgetting” as a defense 43:42 – The issue with compliance 48:35 – Definition of “ceding” in defenses CLICK HERE FOR THE DEFENSE SERIES, SESSION 5 TRANSCRIPTS – Episode 187 – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities   Dipsea is an app that brings you socially responsible sexy stories made by and for those who identify as women. Women often have sexual trauma on top of hurtful cultural messaging around sexuality, so finding a new product that can safely reconnect you to an important essence of yourself is very positive. Dipsea promotes sexual and sensual health via imagination in a way that is safe, discreet, and respectful. Reconnect to parts of you that might have been neglected, find things you didn’t know you were into, or just gain more confidence in the bedroom, whether you have someone with you or not. Check it out totally free using our link – this gives you a full 30 days to explore what they are all about dipseastories.com/tu or just click HERE.   Zocdoc can help you find therapists and psychiatrists and doctors of all sorts and flavors that your family may need that are close to you, taking new patients, and even taking your insurance. Find the doctor that is right for you, and book an appointment, in person or remotely, that works for your schedule. Go to Zocdoc.com/TU and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. No more excuses not to take care of yourself – check it out and book now, many providers are available within 24 hours. Interested in more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight about interpersonal relating.

Aggression can be a good thing. It seems backward, right? Aggression is not a feeling – it is a behavior that is frequently associated with feelings such as anger, fear and even hunger. It is a vital energy that propels us forward with an intention. Aggression can be both a positive or negative resource to help us navigate our personal goals, increase intimacy within our relationships, and to act as a catalyst for change when paired with desire. Follow along as Jeanne Bunker and Sue Marriott break down the negative connotations and provide perspective to harness this resource and help reclaim healthy aggression. We’re going to figure out how to use that aggressive energy – that life giving energy – to propel us forward. – Jeanne Bunker Aggression is a potentially healthy life force Jeanne Bunker – internationally-respected group therapist and bad-ass martial artist Jeanne Bunker , LCSW, CGP, FAGPA, has had a psychotherapy practice in Austin, TX, working with groups, individuals, and couples since 1993. Passionate about teaching and mentoring, Jeanne is a faculty member at the Center for Group Studies in NYC, a frequent presenter for the American Group Psychotherapy Association, has taught internationally (Russia, Romania, Spain), and conducts various ongoing training groups for clinicians. She writes about gender, women’s concerns, oppression, and Modern Analysis. To support her own growth and balance, Jeanne studies and teaches Tai Chi and Kung Fu within the Shaolin-Do tradition. Time Stamps for Healthy Aggression – Ep 186 2:47 – The definition of aggression 8:41 – Distinguishing between aggression and anger and other emotions 15:21 – Connection between aggression and desire 25:30 – The role of aggression in intimacy 30:25 – Creative and constructive versus destructive expression of aggression 37:51 – Example scenario: practicing healthy aggression 50:26 – How “call out culture” can be a defense Resources for Healthy Aggression, Ep 186 Jeanne Bunker’s Website The Center for Group Studies – NYC American Group Psychotherapy Assn – excellent resource for training in group therapy [email protected] – Contact email – she’d love to hear from you Podcast on the science behind aggression – Huberman Labs CLICK HERE FOR DISARMING HUMAN DEFENSES WITH JEANNE BUNKER TRANSCRIPT – Episode 186 – Lightly edited for readability Other related Therapist Uncensored Episodes – or use the search button on our website to find your topics of interest Episode 156: What actually heals in therapy with Dr. Nancy McWilliams Episode 168: Calling in the Call Out Culture with Loretta Ross   We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch salesto organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content and very unique study opportunities. Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – support them to support us! FOR OUR LISTENERS AG1 is offering $30 off if you order by the end of September with our link. We all know that gut health impacts mood and brain function, but what the heck do you do to support gut health? We’ve got you covered by partnering with our sponsor, Athletic Greens product, AG1. AG1 is Ann and Sue’s once-a-day drink that delivers all the basics of important vitamins, minerals, and probiotics. As a TU Listener, Athletic Greens is gives you a free 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D and 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. Plus, supporting our sponsors supports the show which supports mental health access, so go to www.athleticgreens.com/therapistuncensored or click HERE. Like what you are hearing? Check out new videos of our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel.Drop us a note there as well, we love hearing from you. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight about interpersonal relating. To spread the word about secure relating it helps to rate and review the podcast on our favorite podcast player or simply sharing this episode with someone you think could use the free therapy!

Power can be associated with safety, but when misused it can also be a key indicator of a lack of emotional security and a common defensive move. We call it power over versus empowered with and it’s a tricky move because it’s so supported culturally we frequently don’t realize we are taking over. This is the 3rd episode in a series of 5. You can start anywhere but if you prefer to start at the beginning of the series click here for Session 1 or here for Session 2. Join us for free therapy boot camp by going through this series and reflecting on how you relate and what patterns you might want to change interpersonally. When you unconsciously deem “power” as what keeps you “safe” in vulnerable situations, reflecting and rewiring on this dynamic can transform your connections. Human defenses are quite necessary to protect our nervous system and sense of self. The goal isn’t to eliminate defenses – but to learn how to regulate them, especially in relationships. Defenses can often feel triggered when there is an uneven power dynamic expressed in a relationship and can be influenced by outside factors like gender socialization, culture, or personal history. Tune in as Ann and Sue reflect on their own experiences, shame, and navigating power dynamics to form deeper connections. Shownotes at www.therapistuncensored.com/185 Join our private Neuronerd community at www.therapistuncensored.com/join. “Anytime we focus on the power-over position – it can’t be a safe connection. It communicates to your own nervous system that ‘You need to be more alone to be safe…’ It ends up being a self-perpetuating experience.” – Ann Kelley Time Stamps for Power Dynamics – Episode 185 2:47 – Deep dive into the dismissive/”one-upping” defense tactic 9:57 – The role of gender socialization in this defense 14:41 – Addressing shame in relation to defense 24:36 – How our culture breeds narcissism and “one-down” defenses 34:55 – Interactive exercise for vulnerability 45:31 – Reviewing the “Three R’s” spiral CLICK HERE FOR THE DEFENSE SERIES, SESSION 3 TRANSCRIPTS on power dynamics – Episode 185 – Lightly edited for readability Related Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/call-out-culture-168/ We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities   Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – please do check them out to support the show! ACTION ALERT – For a limited time only our partner AG1 is offering our listeners $30 off if purchased by the end of September. This is in addition to the free 1 year supply of Vit D and travel packs. What is AG1? It is the shake Ann and Sue both drink every morning because it actually tastes good and it provides a power-punch of all the good wellness ingredients including for gut health! Redeem here www.athleticgreens.com/therapistuncensored! $75 credit alert for our listeners! Ann and Sue aren’t tech-savvy so they appreciate how easy it is to use and navigate Indeed. It is the hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Find top talent fast with Indeed’s suite of powerful hiring tools like Instant Match, Assessments, and Virtual Interviews. Hate waiting? Indeed’s US data shows over 80% of Indeed employers find quality candidates, whose resume on Indeed matches their job description, the MOMENT they sponsor a job. Start hiring now with a seventy-five dollar sponsorship credit to post your job post at Indeed.com/therapistuncensored If you are the tent pole holding up support for other people, you may want to make sure they are protected should something happen to you. Policygenius is an insurance marketplace that makes it easy to compare quotes from top companies like AIG and Prudential in one place to find your lowest price on life insurance. You could save 50% or more on life insurance by comparing quotes and options start at just $17 per month for $500,000 of coverage. The licensed agents at Policygenius work for you, not the insurance companies and it doesn’t cost you a thing to use their services. Policygenius.com Interested in more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe!

Our friend the hippocampus! Neuronerds – this one is for you. What exactly is happening in our brains when we feel defensive? We go beyond the basics of the amygdala and the pre-frontal cortex and deep dive into the hippocampus to help us understand more deeply what is happening under the surface of our problematic behaviors. The hippocampus deep dive is part 2 of a 5-part series and you can pick it up anywhere. However, if you prefer to start at the beginning, click here to go to Session 1. In the last episode, we explored what Sue and Ann call the 3-R spiral of change, Recognize, Reflect and Rewire. We also identified various common defenses. In this episode, Ann & Sue break down the different areas of our brain, and discuss the roles each can play in our defense responses. Understanding the critical interplay between the amygdala and hippocampus gives us more insight into our own behavior and sheds light on how our history can intrude today. They explain the concept of “coherent narrative” and discuss applying the 3 R Spiral to our relationships and personal healing. By blending neuroscience and these strategies, we can begin to sort through our unconscious defenses and rewire the ways in which we navigate our interpersonal world. “If you’re someone that needs to be right or needs to be giving advice – you might not recognize that’s your own defense. It feels familiar and good to you, but is actually cutting off your ability to attend your own vulnerability…. it’s not enhancing your relationality.” – Ann Kelley Time Stamps – the Hippocampus as a Defense Regulator 1:39 – What is a defense versus what is an adaptation? 7:46 – Recognizing the critical role of our hippocampus as a regulator of our defense systems 15:10 – Understanding coherent narrative – it’s an outcome of neural integration 25:27 – Using mindfulness in the defense process CLICK HERE for the transcript of: Our Friend the Hippocampus, Disarming Human Defenses with Ann & Sue Session 2 – Episode 184 – Lightly edited for readability Session 1 of the series starts here! Other Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes (on Mindfulness) https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/find-your-focus-own-your-attention-with-dr-amishi-jha-177/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/its-not-communication-you-need-its-connection-with-guest-john-howard-178/ We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. If this show brings you and those you care about value, please consider joining us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities. Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – check them out to support the show! We all know that gut health impacts mood and brain function, but what the heck do you do to support gut health? We’ve got you covered by partnering with our sponsor, Athletic Greens product, AG1. AG1 is Ann and Sue’s once-a-day drink that delivers all the basics of important vitamins, minerals, and probiotics. As a TU Listener, Athletic Greens gives you a free 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D and 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. Plus, supporting our sponsors supports the show which supports mental health access, so go to www.athleticgreens.com/therapistuncensored or click HERE.

Ann and Sue get into the nitty gritty by bringing you a short series of conversations on the uncomfortable truth about normal human defenses. Whether you’re receiving hard professional feedback or facing a challenging discussion in your relationship – nobody enjoys those cringy feelings of being told something you don’t know or agree with about yourself. Often these moments trigger an automatic neurobiological protection response in the cells dedicated to protecting us from threat. No human doesn’t have this problem at the most fundamental level – so this series will break it down for exploration. This is the first episode in a five-part series where Ann and Sue take a deep dive into various kinds of frequently used defenses. They discuss how to become more conscious of which state of mind you may be in – protective circuits or connection circuits and how to sort out what to do if in the armored range. The 3 R spiral of change is a process that can help you reconnect and reground yourself in moments of stress. Identifying the ways you display this discomfort is a great first step in creating that shift from our automatic default responses to a more connected state where we can be present within ourselves and our relationships. We all get defensive “Nobody’s died from a feeling. You’re going to have them – maybe you’ll feel embarrassed or ashamed, or unfairly done to.. but the feeling itself is only 90 seconds, after that it’s all story. Feelings are going to have a beginning and a middle and an end, so just ride them out and they will change, morph, eventually subside. You don’t have to ‘do’ anything. It’ll pass. You are gonna be okay.'” – Sue Marriott Time Stamps 2:52 – Three R spiral of change – recognition, reflection, rewiring 9:46 – The last R: “Rewiring” 18:42 – The first stage of self-awareness, waking up and stopping our projections 26:54 – One of the key ingredients to self-awareness 28:53 – The difference between self-care and stubbornness 30:54 – Different types of self-awareness 36:00 – “Don’t do this” when receiving feedback 40:08 – Tips and recommendations for mindfulness CLICK HERE for Defense Series – Part 1 Transcript – Episode 183 – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales (very fun swag!) to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Neuronerd private community. By joining as a Neuronerd premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content and first shot at very unique study opportunities. If we’ve provided value then please check us out, poke around, make sure you feel comfortable and then join us today!   Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – check them out to support the show! Zocdoc can help you find therapists and psychiatrists and doctors of all sorts and flavors that your family may need that are close to you, taking new patients, and even taking your insurance. Find the doctor that is right for you, and book an appointment, in person or remotely, that works for your schedule. Go to Zocdoc.com/TU and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. No more excuses not to take care of yourself – check it out and book now, many providers are available within 24 hours. Good sleep is related to so many good health and mental health outcomes, but we don’ tall have it easy when we try to fall asleep or stay asleep. Nighttime rituals are important, try a cup of hot cocoa before bed that tastes good and is full of wellness ingredients that will help you sleep. Beam includes 3rd party tested hemp free of THC, l-theanine, melatonin and natural adaptogens to help your immunity. Get up to 40% off when you go to shopbeam.com/TU and use code TU at checkout. We hope you enjoy this content, if so please do leave us a rating wherever you get your podcasts so others may discover it as well. Tk you for stopping by!

There is an entire world within each of us. While we come together to create one functioning human being – what is really happening internally to make it all work? Our entire existence is made of different systems – all collaborating to keep us operating healthily on a mental, emotional, and physical level. But what happens when the systems don’t operate smoothly? Just like any system, there can be conflicts that can make the process significantly more difficult. These “parts” are entities or “little beings” that live in our minds and manifest into physical or emotional reactions from traumatic events. Dr. Frank Anderson has spent decades of his life studying these parts and sharing his findings to help others utilize built-in resources like their “self-energy” to navigate their own traumas. Follow along as Sue Marriott and Dr. Anderson weave together psycho-pharmacology, trauma, neuroscience, attachment, and internal family systems. “Imagination is a very powerful neuroplastic agent. So the work that we do in IFS – which is very much imaginary – absolutely has neurophysiological effects on neural networks on the brain and on the body. It’s a beautiful intersection between psychotherapy and neuroscience, and we have more evidence to show the ways they’re linked together.” – Dr. Frank Anderson Ep 182 – About Frank Anderson and IFS Dr. Frank Anderson is an author, psychiatrist, therapist, speaker and trauma specialist who’s spent the past three decades studying neuroscience and trauma treatment. He was a psychiatrist as the Trauma Center in Boston under the direction of Bessel van der Kolk, and was able to learn more about trauma while simultaneously continuing his quest of helping others heal. After meeting Dick Schwartz at a conference his career focus instantly came into full alignment, and he was able to integrate his knowledge of neuroscience and trauma treatment with Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy. Anderson was the former chair and executive director of the Foundation for Self Leadership, an organization focusing on IFS research and the expansion of the IFS model beyond psychotherapy and authored the chapter “Who’s Taking What? Connecting Neuroscience, Psychopharmacology, and Internal Family Systems for Trauma.” He is the lead trainer and consultant for the IFS Institute, an advisor to the International Association of Trauma Professionals (IATP), and maintains a private practice. He is passionate about teaching, enjoy providing therapy consultations and trauma informed IFS-related workshops throughout the world. Time Stamps for Ep 182 4:12 – Frank’s explanation of IFS 8:07 – Introduction to the concept of “self-energy” 17:27 – The neurobiology of PTSD & disassociation 30:31 – Frank’s unconventional views on attachment 41:46 – Key components of IFS that are essential for healing 46:25 – The IFS training process 51:57 – Finding an IFS certified therapist Resources for Ep 182 Frank Anderson’s Website IFS Group Consultation Course – Training Webinars on Various Topics – Training The Arc of Healing Trauma – Online Course “Internal Family Systems: Skills Training Manual” – Book Frank Anderson’s Most Recent Book Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu112-the-life-changing-science-of-memory-reconsolidation-with-guests-bruce-ecker-tori-olds/ CLICK HERE FOR FRANK ANDERSON TRANSCRIPT – Episode 182 – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities.

With an ongoing pandemic, constant political feuds, and the day-to-day stressors of life – finding peace in times of chaos can feel overwhelming. Peritraumatic growth is about meaning-making and managing overwhelming stress as it occurs. People often turn to therapists and other figures for answers, but who really has the solution to these ever-evolving issues? Especially for those who have experienced childhood traumas, seeking help may not feel like a natural process. Co-host Sue Marriott and Arielle Schwartz, Ph.D. take a deep dive into peritraumatic growth and posttraumatic growth to help equip us with the tools to work through our traumas, build different types of resiliency, and live a more fulfilling life. Dr. Schwartz recounts her journey to specialization with complex traumas and how neurobiology has been influential in her professional and personal growth. She utilizes an integrative, mind-body approach to therapy including relational therapy, parts-work therapy, somatic psychology, EMDR Therapy, and therapeutic yoga for trauma. “Post-traumatic growth is our belief that we can work through hard stuff and come out with an increased sense of depth, understanding, wisdom, strength – or whatever that gem is on the other side. But it’s not necessarily the hard stuff that makes us grow – it’s what we do with it – how we metabolize it, how we process it.” – Arielle Schwartz Peritraumatic Growth Ep 181 – About Arielle Schwartz Arielle Schwartz, PhD, CCTP-II, E-RYT, is a licensed clinical psychologist, certified complex trauma professional, and Kripalu yoga teacher with a private practice in Boulder, Colorado. As an internationally sought-out teacher and leading voice in the healing of PTSD and complex trauma, she is the author of six books, including The Complex PTSD Workbook, Therapeutic Yoga for Trauma, and The Post-Traumatic Growth Guidebook. She is dedicated to offering informational mental health and wellness updates through her writing, public speaking, social media presence, and blog. Her integrative, mind-body approach to therapy includes relational therapy, parts-work therapy, somatic psychology, EMDR Therapy, and therapeutic yoga for trauma. She believes that the journey of trauma recovery is an awakening of the spiritual heart. Time Stamps for the Peritraumatic Growth Ep 181 3:58 – Introduction of “vicarious resilience” 9:44 – Peritraumatic growth versus posttraumatic growth 13:06 – Surprising aspects of post-traumatic growth 16:53 – Difference between secure attachment and having resilience 20:22 – Crafting your personal list of resilience practices 20:50 – Various types of resilience 32:51 – The role of mindfulness in peritraumatic growth   Resources for Ep 181 Dr. Arielle Schwartz Website Tons of excellent resources Dr. Arielle Schwartz – Facebook Page Youtube Channel – Great resources here check her page out Link to Dr. Schwartz Full Book List – Excellent references PLEASE TRY TO BUY YOUR BOOKS FROM LOCAL BOOKSELLERS CLICK HERE for Dr. Arielle Schwartz Episode 181 Transcripts – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities. Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast adds value to your day.

How to build epistemic trust to shift internal working models and create more secure relationships. Learn the science of trust and attachment. Deciding who to trust in today’s world is especially hard – fake news, political polarization and societal strife amplifies our already on guard nervous system. When our trust has been broken, whether early in childhood or in our adult relationships, learning who to trust can prove even more challenging. In today’s episode, Dr. Steve Finn and Dr. Ann Kelley discuss the science behind epistemic trust and why many of us may have broken trust meters. They discuss how trust issues can create a mess in our relationship, whether we are the constant skeptic who resists taking in new information or we tend to trust blindly, without testing or holding healthy doubts. Together they provide deep and compassionate insights into these struggles and how they relate to internal working models. A fan favorite, Dr. Finn returns to bring his years of expertise to our listeners about ways to use science to build trust using curiosity and tools of mentalization, including our ability to handle healthy skepticism. “I think curiosity is infectious. When we bring our curiosity…really trying to get into someone else’s shoes, that creates an open door for epistemic trust” – Dr. Steve Finn The Science of Trust Ep 180 – About Dr. Steve Finn Dr. Steve Finn is a founder of the Center for Therapeutic Assessment, a licensed clinical psychologist in practice in Austin, Senior Researcher and Director of Training at the European Center for Therapeutic Assessment at the Catholic University of Milan, Italy, and Director of Training at the Asian-Pacific Center in Tokyo, Japan. He has published 90+ articles and chapters on psychological assessment, psychotherapy, and other topics in clinical psychology. In 2011 Dr. Finn was awarded the Bruno Klopfer Award from the Society of Personality Assessment for distinguished lifetime contributions to the field of personality assessment. In August 2017 he received the award for Distinguished Scientific Contributions to Assessment Psychology from Section IX (Assessment) of the Society for Clinical Psychology (Division 12 of the American Psychological Association). In 2018 he was honored with the 2018 Carl Rogers Award for outstanding contributions to the theory and practice of humanistic psychology from the Society for Humanistic Psychology (Division 32 of the American Psychological Association). Time Stamps for the Science of Trust Ep 180 00:58 – Introduction to “Therapeutic Assessment” 07:25 – Importance of epistemic trust 08:45 – Two types of difficulties in epistemic trust 12:43 – How clients utilize control mastery theory 19:09 – One of the core values of TA – “curiosity” 25:14 – Spotting the difference between hypervigilant trust and hypovigilant trust 27:57 – Explanation of Fonagy’s three virtuous cycles 46:40 – Analyzing epistemic trust in our society Resources for the Science of Trust Ep 180 Therapeutic Assessment – Website The Role of Mentalizing and Epistemic Trust in Psychotherapeutic Relationships – Fonagy, P. Allison, E. (2014) Fonagy, P., Luyten, P., Allison, E. (2015). Epistemic petrification and the restoration of epistemic trust: A new conceptualization of borderline personality disorder and its psychosocial treatment. Journal of Personality Disorders, 29, 575-609. Gergely, G., Egyed, K., & Király, I. (2007). On natural pedagogy. In G. Csibra & G. Gergely (Eds.), Humans and culture: The origins of cultural knowledge and its transition mechanisms. Monographs of the Psychological Bulletin, 11, 107-125. Sperber, D., Clement, F., Heintz, C., Mascaro, O., Mercier, H., Origgi, G., & Wilson, D. (2010). Epistemic vigilance. Mind & Language, 25, 359–393. Fantini, F., Aschieri, F., David, R. M., Martin, H., & Finn, S. E. (2022). Therapeutic Assessment with adults: Using psychological testing to help clients change. New York: Routledge. Finn, S. E. (in press). From unresolved to earned secure attachment: The AAP as a powerful clinical tool in psychotherapy. To appear in George, C., Wargo Aikens, J., & Lehmann, M. (Eds), Clinical application of the Adult Attachment Projective Picture System. Routledge. (pre-print available from the author) Kamphuis, J. H, & Finn, S. E. (2019). Therapeutic Assessment in personality disorders: Toward the restoration of epistemic trust. Journal of Personality Assessment, 101(6), 662-674. Tharinger, D. J. Rudin, D. I., Frackowiak, M., & Finn, S. E. (2022). Therapeutic Assessment with children: Enhancing parental empathy through psychological assessment. Routledge. Dr. Steve Finn’s Book – 2007   Click here to view Steve Finn’s Episode Transcripts – Lightly edited for readability Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https:

Toxic individualism – sounds about right, doesn’t it? This episode explores individualistic thinking and will support you doing the tough internal work to give up power in favor of connection. Utilizing neurobiology, years of research, and professional experience, Terry Real and Ann Kelley break down the history of individualism and the toxic patterns it can hold in our society and in our relationships. Episode notes at www.therapistuncensored.com/180. “You can empower yourself and empower your partner – both in the same breath – but you have to move beyond this culture and learn how to do that.” – Terry Real About Terry Real Terry Real is an internationally recognized family therapist, speaker, and author. Terry founded the Relational Life Institute (RLI), offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents around the country along with a professional training program for clinicians wanting to learn his RLT (Relational Life Therapy) methodology. A family therapist and teacher for more than twenty-five years, Terry is a best-selling author, a senior faculty member of the Family Institute of Cambridge in Massachusetts, and a retired Clinical Fellow of the Meadows Institute in Arizona. Terry has worked with thousands of individuals, couples, and fellow therapists. Through his books, the Institute, and workshops around the country, Terry helps women and men, parents and non-parents, to help them create the connection they desire in their relationships. Time Stamps for Toxic Individualism 2:43 – History and evolution of individualism 3:13 – The fusion of patriarchy and individualism 8:20 – Introduction to the “adaptive child” ideology 14:30 – Explanation of “soft power” 16:22 – The “golden rule” of relationality 24:07 – “Relational mindfulness” and how to apply it 33:55 – Three phases in RLT (relational life therapy) Resources Terry Real’s Website Terry Real’s Relational Workshop “How Can I Get Through to You?” – Book by Terry Real “I Don’t Want to Talk About It” – Book by Terry Real “The New Rules of Marriage”– Book by Terry Real Terry Real’s newest book – June, 2022           Click here for full episode #180 Toxic Individualism transcript (Lightly edited for readability) By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes and very unique study opportunities. We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare. We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast adds value to your day.  

We often focus on being understood through words, but guess what? Words emerge from several deeper processes and can confuse, disconnect, and even unintentionally fabricate what’s going on. Learn what works and what doesn’t when trying to build closeness and connection with those you love. Tune in for this week’s episode as co-host Sue Marriott and John Howard discuss the power of tuning in under the words, widening our awareness of emotional communication, mindfulness and spirituality in secure functioning relationships. When we are connected on a neurobiological level, it opens the door for the other “fancier stuff” such as parenting, sex, travel, intellectual interests, romance, and money management. “The experience of being in a relationship is an existential one. It’s a spiritual event in people’s lives.” About John Howard John Howard is an internationally recognized therapist, wellness expert, and educator who uses the latest science to help couples have stronger relationships. He is the host of The John Howard Show, a wellness podcast, and the creator of the Ready Set Love® series of online programs for couples. John is a Cuban American whose first language is Spanish and thus prioritizes diversity and inclusion, drawing on multicultural influences from years of traveling and studying indigenous traditions. He has presented on the neuroscience of couples therapy at leading conferences and developed a couples and family therapy curriculum for the Dell Medical School in Austin. In 2019, he developed Presence Therapy®, an integrative mind-body approach to couples therapy taught to psychotherapists worldwide. John is also the CEO of PRESENCE, a wellness center in Austin dedicated to helping you achieve optimal physical, mental, and relationship health.     Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, discounts on anything we produce, and unique study opportunities.     Episode Time Stamps 1:38 – Psychobiological Approach to Couple’s Therapy (PACT) principles 5:59 – How to read the interaction as a whole 15:08 – How does this methodology apply to consensually non-monogamous relationships? 18:17 – Key aspects of John’s new book, “More Than Words” 21:22 – What your brain is really looking for in connections 31:28 – Explanation of “inviting care” into relationships Resources John Howard’s Website Ready Set Love – Online Couple’s Course Ready Set Love – Podcast Austin In Connection – Non-Profit Presence Therapy Website The PACT Institute Website John Howard’s Book, February 2022 Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu12-if-its-not-good-for-you-its-not-good-for-us-interview-with-relationship-expert-stan-tatkin/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu121-the-purpose-of-relationships-redefined-during-quarantine-with-stan-tatkin/   Click Here to View Episode Transcripts

Through state-of-art science, learn how to reduce distractibility, rumination, and catastrophic thinking with 12-15 mins of targeted mindfulness training. Many of us struggle with hyper-vigilant minds that overwhelm our nervous system. We then often overcompensate by habitually tuning out, causing us to miss important information from our bodies and our relationships. This becomes especially true under high stress, which can wreak havoc on our ability to attend and be present where it matters most in our lives. In today’s episode, co-host Dr. Ann Kelley talks with neuroscientist and author, Dr. Amishi Jha about her research findings on attention, concentrations and focus. Dr. Jha summarizes years of research findings on the neural bases of attention and the effects of mindfulness-based training programs on cognition, emotion, resilience, and performance. Through her work, she and her team have identified some of the most efficient and effective mindfulness skills that have will calm our minds, increase our focus and attention, and even improve our mood and sense of well-being. It literally changes the way our mind is wired. “… everything can feel like a caution sign in the world when you’re on high alert. That can lead to anxiety disorders, and is very common within PTSD. But most of the time, people don’t think of that as an attentional challenge. And I’m saying it actually is – changing how we pay attention may soften the costs of a hypervigilant mind …” Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, discounts on anything we produce, and unique study opportunities. About Dr. Amishi Jha Amishi Jha presenting at the PopTech convention (2010) Dr. Amishi Jha, Ph.D. is a Director of Contemplative Neuroscience and Professor of Psychology at the University of Miami. Prior to her current post, she was an Assistant Professor at the Center for Cognitive Neuroscience at the University of Pennsylvania. She received her B.S in Biological Psychology from the University of Michigan, her Ph.D. in Psychology (Cognitive Neuroscience) from the University of California–Davis, and her post-doctoral training at the Brain Imaging and Analysis Center at Duke University in functional neuroimaging. With grants from the Department of Defense and several private foundations, she leads research on the neural bases of attention and the effects of mindfulness-based training programs on cognition, emotion, resilience, and performance in education, corporate, elite sports, first-responder, and military contexts. Time Stamps 9:25 – What is “attention”? 10:09 – Analogy of the brain as a “flashlight” 20:33 – Inspiration for “Peak Mind” 27:16 – So why mindfulness? 29:40 – Hypothesis on the evolution of the brain 43:09 – Where/How to start implementing daily mindfulness Resources Dr. Amishi Jha’s Website “How to Tame Your Wandering Mind” – Ted Talk Amishi’s Book – “Peak Mind” Amishi Jha Episode – For transcript click here

Ever curious how attachment theory applies to polyamory? In a society seemingly dominated by monogamy – it can be difficult for those in a consensual non-monogamous or polyamorous relationship to find representation. Roughly 5% of the population actively participates in polyamory or multi-partner relationships, although we believe the number wildly under-represents this rich community. It is important to not only have representation – but also the same resources for support that monogamous couples receive. Psychotherapist and relationship expert, Jessica Fern works to change that. You may recognize her as the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-Monogamy where she dives into uncharted territory and extends attachment theory into consensual nonmonogamy. Tune in as Fern and co-host Sue Marriott explore the depths of consensual nonmonogamy, from a personal and professional perspective, and the importance of the application of attachment theory when navigating multi-partner relationships. “When couples come in and they’re struggling, they might say we’re dealing with agreement challenges, or we’re fighting more, or one of us can’t get over our jealousy …. those are typically symptoms of deeper issues.” Jessica Fern   In her book, Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-Monogamy, Fern provides a fascinating perspective of attachment theory and how it operates within multi-partner relationships. As the world starts to become more open to relationship styles outside of monogamy, Fern strives to create a healthy discussion and cultivates opportunities for success on an individual level and within relationships. Utilizing resources like her six specific strategies, Ferns provides resources to heal past traumas and create more fulfilling, secure connections. This book is one of many we have featured in our Therapist Uncensored “Reading Pods.” “…it’s interesting to even think of sexuality as an identity. Cause for some of us it’s, it is very much an identity, for others – it feels very private and they don’t want to wear it as an identity. And some people don’t feel like they even have that choice to conceal it…”   Get your first 2 months of SimplePractice for free when you sign up for an account today as a Therapist Uncensored listener. This exclusive offer is valid for new customers only and by signing up through the following link: simplepractic.com/therapistuncensored   Time Stamps 6:02 Descriptions of polyamory, poly-romantic relationships 11:30 The difference between poly-orientation and lifestyle 13:03 The definition of solo-polyamorous 15:08 Secure Functioning 21:56 Primal Attachment Panic 23:50 The difference between enmeshment and closeness 34:04 “Non-Monogamy will expose the cracks in your relationship” 44:52 Attachment styles can vary between partners in Polycules 48:04 For those who have been highly traumatized, is BDSM an extension of their trauma or self-expression? Resources Jessica Fern’s Website Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-Monogamy “Secure Attachment with Self” 4-month Live Online Program “Maybe Monogamy Isn’t the Only Way to Love” Article by Drake Baer – 2017 Therapist Uncensored Podcast Episode 42 – Sexual Vitality Refreshing Our Understanding of Sexual Health with Doug Braun Harvey (Part 1) Therapist Uncensored Podcast Episode 43 – Sexual Vitality Six Principles of Sexual Health with Doug Braun Harvey (Part 2) About Jessica Fern Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker, author, and trauma and relationship expert. She specializes in working with clients from around the world to form healthier connections and to seek more fulfilling experiences. Jessica is the author of the book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual NonMonogamy, and is in the process of writing her second book which expands on the original ideologies. Along with her private practice, Fern provides resources and also leads online programs designed to better help individuals navigate hardships and find security within themselves. Check out her program: “Secure Attachment with Self” launching February 4, 2022 to take a step on your own journey to healing traumas and finding stability in such difficult times.   Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and specific episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get extra content, ad-free feed, discounts on anything we produce, study opportunities and – in Feb 2022 we will meet live together after a series of private episodes breaking down Jill Bolte-Taylor’s, Whole-Brain Living. If you are seeing this afterwards, all this will be accessible plus new things we are

Self-compassion has gotten a bad rap, it’s time to update your perspective on this key tool to security. We’ve been socialized to associate compassion with femininity, self-love, and gentleness, and self-compassion as a way of saying to be “nice” to yourself – basically a recipe to get walked on. Dr. Kristin Neff has dedicated years of research to help understand, update and restructure the ideas around weakness so that all genders can harness the power of having a self-compassionate stance. Join Dr. Kristin Neff and Co-host Dr. Ann Kelley as they explore the world of fierce self-love. Embracing Fierce Self-Compassion “Women have lower self-compassion levels than men because we’re socialized to give compassion to others and to be self-sacrificing. We feel less entitled to meet our own needs than men do.” Kristin Neff Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, discounts on anything we produce, and unique study opportunities. About Dr. Kristin Neff Dr. Kristin Neff Dr. Kristin Neff is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, who has dedicated her life to understanding and educating others on their journey to fierce self-love. Neff earned her doctorate from the University of California at Berkeley and is currently an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. In addition to writing numerous academic articles and book chapters on the topic, she is the author of the book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, along with her newest release – Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive. In conjunction with her colleague Dr. Chris Germer, she has developed an empirically supported training program called Mindful Self-Compassion, which is taught by thousands of teachers worldwide. They co-authored The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook as well as Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program: A Guide for Professionals. She is also co-founder of the nonprofit Center for Mindful Self-Compassion. Time Stamps 00:18 – Why Neff shifted her research towards women 1:13 – Fierce self-compassion 2:09 – How men are harmed by their inability to be tender 7:13 – How it connects to the sympathetic nervous system 11:28 – Neff’s 3-step model 13:59 – Research on self-compassion 21:22 – Biology or socialization? 32:18 – Why we are “afraid” to appreciate ourselves 50:29 – Positives and negatives of feeling anger 58:16 – Inner compassion Resources Dr. Kristin Neff – Her main website loaded with free resources and MP3’s Center for Mindful Self-Compassion Mindful Self-Compassion Intensive Workshop The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program: A Guide for Professionals Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive Kristen Neff: Self Compassion Step by Step, The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself (Audio CD) Karen Bluth, forward by Kristin Neff: The Self-Compassion Workbook for Teens Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell: The Narcissism Epidemic Living in the Age of Entitlement Self Compassion Test Want more on this topic? You’ll probably enjoy these previous episodes from Therapist Uncensored Building Grit Through Self Compassion with Dr. Kristin Neff – Episode 23 Sue and Ann Explore Self Criticism and Internal Scripts – Episode 169 View Show Transcript Here Value this content? Please take a moment to leave us a rating and review wherever you get your podcasts to help others discover this resource, and share with those you think can benefit.  

Learn what the amygdala does and doesn’t do, how it’s related to memory and consciousness from the best, Dr. Joseph LeDoux. Fun times, sister neuronerds! We are honored to introduce him to you all! Joseph LeDoux – The Amygdaloids In the previous episode, we covered how neurobiology affects your relationships to help prepare you for the incredible discussion we had this week with amygdala expert, Dr. Joseph LeDoux. Listen in as we discuss the amygdala, non-conscious versus unconscious, protein synthesis, the differences between fear and threat, and how it all applies in the world of attachment. “…that’s why I always thought of the amygdala as a non-conscious process – because it’s generating these behaviors non-consciously. Then cognitively, we interpret that to generate a narrative that makes it make sense in terms of who we are…”   Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, Ask Me Anything sessions, discounts on anything we produce, and unique study opportunities. About Joseph LeDoux Dr. Joseph LaDoux Dr. Joseph LeDoux – is a professor at NYU in the Center for Neural Science. He is also the director of the Emotional Brain Institute at NYU and a well-respected author of many books including The Emotional Brain, Synaptic Self, and Anxious. Throughout his career, he has received many awards for his research including the American Psychological Association Distinguished Scientific Contributions Award, and the American Psychological Association Donald O. Hebb Award. In his free time, LeDoux is the lead singer of his band, the Amygdaloids. Time Stamps for Unpacking the Amygdala 1:05 – Introduction to LeDoux’s rat experiment 2:30 – Split-brain patients 6:45 – Story follows state explanation 8:20 – Introduction to the bell curve 12:34 – The relationship between the non-conscious and the unconscious 18:30 – Memory reconsolidation 19:05 – Protein synthesis 26:44 – Taming the Hippocampus 31:30 – Optigenetics 37:52 – LeDoux’s tips for emotional regulation 41:26 – Explanation of the new book – “The Deep History of Ourselves: The Four-Billion-Year Story of How We Got Conscious Brains“ Resources “Anxious: Using the Brain to Understand and Treat Fear and Anxiety” – Dr. Joseph LeDoux “The Emotional Brain: The Mysterious Underpinnings of Emotional Life” – Dr. Joseph LeDoux “I Got A Mind to Tell You” – Psychology Today Article “The Amygdaloids” – Music Complete List of LeDoux’s Books “Putting the ‘Mental’ Back in Mental Disorders” – Research Paper, National Library of Medicine   Relevant Episodes “Polyvagal Theory in Action – The Practice of Body Regulation With Dr. Stephen Porges” – Therapist Uncensored Podcast, Episode 93 View Episode Transcripts Here

Learning about relational science and applied attachment theory can help you keep your cool. Stay updated in this episode learning latest about the science of threat. This episode on the neurobiology of threat is a warm up to next time, when we air the interview with the amygdala expert, Dr. Joseph Ladoux. Everyone responds to threat uniquely and each situation is different of course. Ann & Sue discuss recent findings and how to apply the science to understanding how your brain works when it senses danger. Inspired by a discussion with Dr. Joseph Ledoux (interview to be published in the next episode #174) – in today’s episode, Ann and Sue are covering their take on the latest research related to fear and threat in humans. Michelle Bobb-Parris/Getty Images Ann and Sue blend their own personal experiences and knowledge of people, mistakes, dysregulation and basic relational neuroscience to help improve your relationships and integrate healing & change within the body. Follow along as they take a deeper dive into Ledoux’s research and break down his experiment measuring rats’ fear in moments of threat and how that applies to human responses in similar instances. They also cover the misconceptions about how the amygdala is often perceived as the “fear center” of the body, and why it’s important beyond caring about neuroanatomy. As always, they also share their own not-pretty version of figuring this stuff out in real life. (Transcript provided below) We are proud to offer this library of episodes free to the world and accessible. In order to help us do that, please join our Therapist Uncensored online community! You’ll get deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, an ad-free feed, Q&A sessions, discounts on stuff we may produce, unique study opportunities, and access to your like-minded peers!   Time Stamps for Neurobiology of Threat: 3:24 – Discussion about Sue’s interview with Joseph Ledoux 4:23 – Explanation of Joseph Ledoux’s rat experiment 15:12 – Threat responses are not amoral 29:01 – Ledoux’s implicit narrative 29:54 – The amygdala is not the “fear center” of the body 42:32 – The “third anchor”, memory consolidation 45:00 – Updating your own narrative Episode Resources for Neurobiology of Threat Joseph Ledoux’s Article – “The Emotional Brain, Fear, and the Amygdala” Elena Paci, Charlotte Lawrenson, Jasmine Pickford, Robert A.R. Drake, Bridget M. Lumb, Richard Apps. “Cerebellar Modulation of Memory Encoding in the Periaqueductal Grey and Fear Behaviour.” eLife (First published: March 15, 2022) DOI: 10.7554/eLife.76278 “Discovery of novel brain fear mechanisms offers target for anxiety-reducing drugs” – University of Bristol, March 2022 View the Transcript Here! More like this from Therapist Uncensored: https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/whole-brain-living-psychology-neuroanatomy-spirit-with-dr-jill-bolte-taylor-164/ If you value this content, please leave us a rating and review to help others discover this resource, and share freely with those you think may benefit. We really appreciate it!

Guest Dr. Elizabeth Stanley knows stress reduction – she had developed a program used by the US military called Mindfulness-based Mind Fitness Training. Co-host Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Stanley discuss practical strategies that will help you build resilience, recover from trauma, heal and thrive. “…One of the biggest gifts we each give the world around us is our own self-regulation – our own presence. Only from a self-regulated place are we able to contribute to the collective…” Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley has dedicated years to understanding her own traumatic experiences and extended her knowledge to others through research and teaching, including her work developing the Mindfulness-Based Mind Fitness Training (MMFT)® (utilized by the United States military). There are many factors that contribute to the way in which we manage stress. From early developmental experiences to the lessons we learn within our culture – how we process and manage our experiences during stress and trauma plays a large role in the way we navigate the world around us. Too often we go on autopilot and ignore the impact of stress and trauma on our body. This can have a devastating impact on us personally, but also on our relationships. Thrive even under stress “…we kind of divorce trauma and write it off as that’s what happens with weak people or people who can’t handle it. So people who are really suffering that way don’t really want to admit it to themselves or to anyone else because that somehow reflects on them that they’re broken or wrong or weak or powerless in ways that really isn’t true. Stress and trauma are actually a biological continuum, but we’ve divorced it this way…” Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, Ask Me Anything sessions, discounts on anything we produce, and unique study opportunities. About Dr. Elizabeth Stanley Elizabeth A. Stanley, Ph.D., is an associate professor of security studies at Georgetown University. She is the creator of Mindfulness-Based Mind Fitness Training (MMFT)®, taught to thousands in civilian and military high-stress environments. Stanley is also an award-winning author and U.S. Army veteran with service in Asia and Europe, she holds degrees from Yale, Harvard, and MIT. She’s also is a certified practitioner of Somatic Experiencing, a body-based trauma therapy.     Time Stamps 1:08 – Background on Dr. Stanley’s life 5:09 – The creation of her mindfulness-based training Program 6:16 – How culture plays a role in toxic/overworked environments 22:01 – The window of stress explanation 23:20 – Three pathways that can make the window narrow 45:49 – Three principles of mindfulness 47:57 – The biggest “Pay Off Habit” recommendations 56:20 – Implementing mindfulness regulation strategies into the military Resources Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s Website “Widen the Window: Training Your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recover from Trauma” – Purchase “Mindfulness-Based Mind-Fit Training” – Online Courses “Optimizing the Caveman Within Us” – Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s TedTalk Training your brain to thrive show notes

Writing courageous words can heal deep wounds. Bibliotherapy, family reconciliation, mother-daughter bonding and the questionable power of memory are all covered in today’s episode with Laura Davis, author of the Courage to Heal and the new memoir, Burning Light of Two Stars. “…no one should ever sacrifice their own well-being to maintain a psychologically devastating relationship. The final option for reconciliation may be not having a direct relationship with the person, & instead being able to find resolution inside yourself – this can be the best choice…” How do we navigate tumultuous relationships in life? When do we know when to walk away, or to stay and reconcile? Most individuals will experience a tough relationship in their lifetime – sometimes with family, romantic partners, colleagues, or friendships. The type of relationships that feel unbearably frustrating, almost impossible to maintain – so, how do we find peace within the chaos? Author and teacher, Laura Davis is an expert in navigating these kinds of connections. In her most recent book, “The Burning Light of Two Stars”, she openly shares the raw feelings behind her decades-long relationship with her mother and the beautifully tragic ending to her life. From her childhood of abuse and young adulthood of healing, follow along as Davis and co-host Sue Marriott examine her journey through reconciliation as she becomes her mother’s caretaker. “I used to think that the opposite of estrangement was reconciliation, but actually – the opposite is what we have to do to get to a place of peace with the reality of this relationship…”   We are proud to offer this library of episodes free to the world and accessible. In order to help us do that, please join our Therapist Uncensored online community! You’ll get deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, an ad-free feed, Ask Me Anything sessions, discounts on stuff we may produce, unique study opportunities, and access to your like-minded peers!   Time Stamps for Courage to Heal author Laura Davis interview 3:14 – Davis’s personal journey 5:03 – The journey of writing “The Courage to Heal” 10:42 – Explanation of “The Burning Light of Two Stars” 13:28 – Book excerpt #1 from “The Burning Light of Two Stars” 25:45 – Book excerpt #2 from “The Burning Light of Two Stars” 39:45 – Finding reconciliation and healing 50:30 – How writing can be a tool for healing & transformation 59:21 – Secure priming Resources *Special Bibliotherapy for Therapist Uncensored Listeners* Laura Davis’s Website & Workshops “The Courage to Heal” – Book by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis “The Burning Light of Two Stars” – Book by Laura Davis “I Never Told Anyone” – Book by Ellen Bass Link to the first 5 Chapters of “The Burning Light of Two Stars” The audiobook of “The Burning Light of Two Stars” – Read by Laura Davis Signed copies of “The Burning Light of Two Stars” Travel to Tuscany with Laura Davis! Click the book you’d like to purchase: Laura’s riveting new memoir examines the endurance of mother-daughter love, how memory protects and betrays us, and the determination it takes to fulfill a promise when ghosts from the past come knocking   MORE FROM THERAPIST UNCENSORED: TU112: The Life-Changing Science of Memory Reconsolidation with Guests Bruce Ecker & Tori Olds(Opens in a new browser tab) Find full transcript in the podcast player. And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

When talk therapy isn’t enough How Attachment-Focused EMDR works and when to use it While talk therapy can be an incredible resource for working through and healing traumas – sometimes it is not enough. The theory around trauma is that when it occurs it “gets locked in the nervous system” in the form of fragmented thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations. This makes true healing difficult. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, also known as EMDR, is an evolving science that utilizes bilateral stimulation to help connect the left side of the brain to the right in order to form more cohesive, healing thoughts to better support the healing process. Dr. Laurel Parnell is a leading expert in EMDR, and uses her vast knowledge to help train thousands of clinicians worldwide to spread the safe science. Using the “lighting it up and linking it up” methodology combined with the Four Foundational Resources, Parnell helps individuals suffering from PTSD and other obstacles better navigate their world and release some of the tension stored within the body and mind. Tune in for this episode as co-host Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Parnell take a deep dive into the evolution and successes of EMDR.   “…people can spend years in talk therapy working through some horrible accident, and they’re not getting better because the therapy isn’t reaching where the trauma’s stored and it’s not helping with that integration of the nonverbal experience…” Join our Therapist Uncensored online community as a TU Neuronerd and help support getting this content out to the world. For deeper dives into topics and extra episodes, join our online community for as little as $5 a month and get deep-dive content, ad-free feed, Ask Me Anything sessions, discounts on anything we produce and unique study opportunities. About Laurel Parnell Clinical psychologist and director of the Parnell Institute for Attachment-Focused EMDR, Dr. Laurel Parnell is a leading expert on Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). She has served on the faculty of the California Institute for Integral Studies in San Francisco, as well as at John F. Kennedy University. Parnell is also the co-director of the non-profit Trauma Assistance Program-International, “TAP-IN”. She has dedicated her life to training thousands of clinicians both nationally and internationally and is the author of six books on EMDR.   Time Stamps 1:11 – What we do with EMDR 5:44 – Introducing the Four Foundational Resources 12:30 – Explanation of what Standard EMDR looks like 16:05 – Breaking Down Bilateral Stimulation 21:12 – The Connection between REM Sleep & EMDR 27:49 – “Little T” Traumas and “Big T” Traumas 29:57 – “Creating Ideal Communities” for Healing 35:22 – Integrating Attachment-Focused EMDR 46:53 – How to Integrate EMDR Virtually 53:04 – Making Modifications to the Practice 1:06:55 – Understanding EMDR Timelines Resources Dr. Laurel Parnell’s Website Parnell Institute EMDR Website EMDR Training Workshops Parnell Institute Facebook Group Find an EMDR Trained Therapist Christie Sprowl’s Website – EMDR Expert Dr. Francine Shapiro’s Website “Inside the Mind of Dr. Dan Siegel” – Therapist Uncensored Podcast Laurel Parnell’s Books (Click the Image to Purchase)         Not ready to join us as an official Neuronerd? We respect that, no sweat, just glad you know it’s an option. But if you are this deep into the show notes we hope you have gotten something from the wealth of content in our episode library and we’d love it if you might share it with someone you think could use it. The way new people find us is mainly word of mouth, so leaving a rating or review – that is how the good content finds its way across the world. Thanks, friend!      

Self-criticism is such a practiced skill it could be an Olympic sport – style points, consistency, creativity. Learn more about this common practice and what it may mean about your internal working script. Hearing yourself criticized impacts your nervous system no matter if the voice is your own or someone else’s. self attack can be brutal Self-criticism, unfortunately, is something that most individuals can deeply identify with. Not only does it affect our own self-esteem, but it also can take a heavy toll on our relationships and the ways in which we navigate the world. But can self-criticism look different for different attachment styles? What outer influences contribute to our critical tendencies? You will want to tune in this week, as Ann and Sue answer these (and many more) questions, by taking a deep dive into self-criticism as it relates to different attachment styles. Learn more about the detrimental role our cultures and societal pressures play in our thoughts, and how we can help build healthier patterns through secure attachment priming. We are proud to offer this library of episodes free to the world and accessible. In order to help us do that, please join our Therapist Uncensored online community! You’ll get deeper dives into topic and extra episodes, an ad-free feed, Ask Me Anything sessions, discounts on stuff we may produce, unique study opportunities, and access to your like-minded peers! Time Stamps 19:28 – Explanation of how self-criticism can activate a threat response 20:31 – How avoidant attachment/dismissive styles can differ in self-criticism 23:42 – Pleasure and soothing and the roles they can play in self-criticism 28:50 – Preoccupied self-criticism 29:24 – Society & culture’s role in criticism 37:10 – Explanation of secure attachment priming Resources “Attachment Styles Modulate Neural Markers of Threat and Imagery when Engaging in Self-criticism” Article “Music, Emotion, and Therapy – Interview with Bob Schneider” – Therapist Uncensored, Episode 45 Therapist Uncensored Episode Transcript Email Download New Tab Ann Kelley: Hey, Sue Marriott. I am happy to be back in the studio with you. Sue Marriott: Absolutely. It's so nice to actually be recording together. We've been doing so many crazy things separately and yeah, it's fun. So let's do this, Ann Kelley: let's do some announcements. You know how we've been talking about how important it is at Therapist Uncensored that we build community, right? We are really excited. We've been hinting at this suggesting it, but we're going to do it. We're going to have a live meetup here in Austin, Texas, and we are going to encourage live meetups, wherever Therapist Uncensored reaches. Sue Marriott: Yeah. So if you're a listener on April 22nd, this is all going to happen simultaneously. We've already had a couple of people sign up to host in their local community. So wherever you're hearing this from our idea here is. We're going to be announcing like, so somebody wants to host in Boise, Idaho, or in Calcutta or in Sydney, Australia, wherever you're listening from, you just raise your hand, let us know. And we will announce it. Basically, all you would have to do is find a location. COVID, you know, friendly location for people to gather and, you know, everybody will pay for themselves. Things like that. No big deal. But. There's probably, there may be other listeners of this podcast near you. And especially if you're in a Metro area, New York, you guys are one of our highest listeners, Los Angeles, of course, the big hubs. So if somebody will just raise their hand and say, Hey, let's meet at you know, sour duck, uh, you know, and, uh, and you just need a big patio or something. Then the notion is that anybody that's also listening to the podcast, that's maybe a neighbor of yours. You guys already have a ton in common, right? Ann Kelley: Like not everybody listens to a neuro nerd kind of podcast. That's for sure. So if you are interested in this, you have some commonalities. That's what we assumed. So even if you just have one other person in your community, that's enough. It doesn't have to be a huge one. We want everybody in the same day to gather and talk amongst yourself, get to know you have the community have connections. So we're going to do it in Austin, Texas on April 22nd at four o'clock. And um, we have few, I know we have a host volunteer in Milwaukee. We have several host, volunteers already, Sue Marriott: Bozeman, Montana. Ann Kelley: Oh, that's true. And I think one in Australia. And so I'm not sure which city yet, but I think what we are going to do if you volunteered to be a host, you're not gonna have to pay for anything. But I think we are going to send you a Therapist Uncensored t-shirt, so when people get to your location, they'll know where to find you. Sue Marriott: And just a thank you. Ann Kelley: And just to thank you

“It’s not about letting harms and injustices get a free pass. It’s about making choices about how you seek that accountability in a way that’s more likely to be effective.” Calling in Call-out Culture and lots more…. see show notes below for more resources! Loretta J. Ross is an activist, professor, feminist and warrior of reproductive justice and human rights. She is a master of a kind yet powerfully effective confrontation and advocacy. In this episode she teaches about self-forgiveness as an important missed step in advocacy, the 5 C Continuum and surprisingly, she debunks the idea of security and safety as a goal in human relating. She doesn’t believe in safety for good reason – it’s a good wake up call. Join us in a powerful discussion with Ross and co-host, Sue Marriott as they look at young radicals, the idea of inclusive human justice work (this means everybody) and her techniques that many who know co-regulation will appreciate. About Loretta J Ross Beginning her series of careers as a human rights activist, Loretta J. Ross has dedicated her life to social change. She has worked at the National Football League Player’s Association, the DC Rape Crisis Center, the National Organization for Women (NOW), the National Black Women’s Health Project, the Center for Democratic Renewal (National Anti-Klan Network), the National Center for HumanRights Education, and SisterSong Women of Color Reproductive Justice Collective. After her retirement in 2012, she continues her influential efforts by teaching Women and Gender studies as a clinical professor at Smith College in Georgia. Among her dedication to change, she has also been the author and co-author of many books and articles, including Reproductive Justice: An Introduction with Rickie Solinger, and Radical Reproductive Justice: Foundations, Theory, Practice, Critique. Ross has also been featured in many impressive news outlets like the New York Times, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, TIME magazine, and many others. In 2022, she plans to release her most recent piece, Calling in the Calling Out Culture.   “Call-out culture” – is a term coined within the last few years, but it is a concept that has existed long before. With a society immersed in technology, there are many positives about the seemingly never-ending conversation, but with this increase in connection and immediate dialogue, there’s also an increase in the ability to speak negatively to and about one another. How do we educate others without tearing them down? In a divided world, changing our approach can help create social change. “Calling in is to invite people into a conversation rather than a fight.” L.J. Ross For the young fighters: Stop imagining that you’re the entire chain of freedom, the whole revolution doesn’t rest on your shoulders. The chain of freedom stretches backward towards all of our ancestors and forward into our descendants. Our whole job is to simply make sure that the chain doesn’t break at our link. “You are more likely to have an influence,” she said, “if you are listening carefully, respecting their humanity even as you disagree with them. The person who uttered those hard words will start walking them back because they did not get the reaction they were counting on.” Calling out someone, with the intent to shame and humiliate, “can be a paradox, because it’s not likely to get you the results you desire. It’s more likely to lock someone into their position.” Time Stamps: 2:00 – About Loretta J. Ross – personal story, Calling In Call-Out Culture backstory 10:16 – Young radicals – The Importance of Understanding Perspective 11:56 – Self Forgiveness – IMPORTANT POINT 17:03 – Breaking Down the Concept of “Appropriate Whiteness” 20:46 – Understanding “Performative Activism” 25:17 – Exploration of what “Safety” really is – Loretta schools Sue 🙂 29:24 – The “5 C Continuum” 51:54 – Utilizing your “Toggle Switch” of Consciousness   Resources: Loretta J Ross’s Website Loretta J Ross Ted Talk Speaker’s Notes What if Instead of Calling People Out, We Called Them In? – New York Times Article Purchase Loretta’s book, “Reproductive Justice: An Introduction” Purchase Loretta’s book, “Undivided Rights: Women of Color Organizing for Reproductive Justice” “Human Rights and Reproductive Justice” with Loretta Ross – The Trail Article The Future Is ‘Radical Reproductive Justice’ – Rewire Newsgroup Article Fighting White Supremacy and White Privilege to Build a Human Rights Movement “Eugenicists Never Retreat, They Just Regroup: Sterilization and Reproductive Oppression in Prisons” – Article by Loretta J Ross Loretta J Ross recognized a

Psychedelic-assisted therapy (PAT) means just that, a medicine used as a tool to deepen the possibilities for healing. It’s not the drug, it’s the therapy. NOTE: Find TU listener activities, upcoming meeting etc on FB HERE Psychedelic-assisted therapy: We don’t have to rely on the medicine work to do everything. “Plant medicines aren’t designed to fix us. They help us recognize our truth and lead us towards the next steps we have to take to heal. This is our work to do. When we become clear with who we are, we can bring our shadow into the light.” – Dr. Dan Engle The use of psychedelics is slowly gaining favor as part of a holistic approach and is radically changing the way we think about therapy and psychiatric medicine. In this episode, Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP discusses the therapeutic use of psychedelics with Dr. Dan Engle, the Founder and Medical Director of Kuya Institute for Transformational Medicine in Austin, Texas. Dr. Engle shares his vision for transformative medicine and how he sees the industry moving forward as it reforms into a transformative model. Tune in and learn more as we explore treatment for various debilitating mental health issues with powerful ancient molecules. Psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy (PAP) refers to professionally supervised use of ketamine, MDMA, psilocybin, LSD and ibogaine as part of a carefully elaborated psychotherapeutic process. Clinical results so far have shown safety and efficacy, even for “treatment resistant” conditions, and far superior effects than traditional therapies alone, or traditional medicines such as antidepressants. In addition, the treatment is short-term and typically has little side effects or risk with careful and adequate screening. If you enjoy the excellent content in our episode library please support the show by joining our online community! Click here This treatment isn’t new, actually, the use of plants to achieve non-ordinary states of mind for wellbeing is ancient. But there has been a renaissance in exploring non-ordinary states as route to healing and the PAP model opens up interesting questions regarding diagnostics and explanation of psychological distress. It may serve to advance novel explanations for mental disorders and their treatment, in a way that considers social and cultural factors, historical adversities, and acute trauma. Show Notes: 00:00:00 Introduction 00:02:11 The Kuya Institute And Community 00:06:41 Sparking An Interest In Psychedelics 00:12:45 Understanding Body And Mind 00:20:03 Exploring The Effects Of Psychedelics 00:28:51 Therapeutic Accessibility Of Psychedelics 00:31:04 Innovating Treatment Models 00:33:21 Ketamine And Its Usage 00:35:11 Ketamine Safety And Psilocybin 00:38:50 Psychedelic States And Safety 00:41:13 The Conscious And Subconscious Mind 00:43:46 The Role Of Facilitators 00:47:34 Tuning Into The Subconscious 00:50:40 MDMA Focused Therapy 00:57:58 MDMA And Altered States 01:01:56 MDMA Side Effects 01:11:26 Contacting Dr. Engle Complete transcript published below, keep scrolling. Important Links: Psychedelics and Neuroplasticity – A Systematic Review Unraveling the Biological Underpinnings of Pychedelics Sept 2021, Psychiatry MAPS – Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies Kuya The Second Brain My Stroke of Insight MAPS Organization A Dose of Hope Jill Bolte Taylor – Past Episode Anatomy of an Epidemic Trey Ratcliff – Past Episode DrDanEngle.com FullSpectrumMedicine.com ThankYouLife.org About Dr. Dan Engle Dr. Dan Engle has a unique background in integrative psychiatry, neurocognitive restoration, peak performance medicine and psychedelic research. Dr. Dan unitizes his profound knowledge and experience to help individuals shift from illness and trauma to health and happiness. Dr. Dan’s trans-disciplinary approach focuses on healing all aspects of the mind, body and spirit in order to help individuals achieve optimum health, wellbeing and sustained fulfillment. Dr. Dan is the Founder and Medical Director of Kuya Institute for Transformational Medicine in Austin, Texas; Full Spectrum Medicine, a psychedelic integration and educational platform; and Thank You Life, a non-profit funding stream supporting access to psychedelic therapies. Dr. Dan is the author of The Concussion Repair Manual: A Practical Guide to Recovering from Traumatic Brain Injuries, as well as his new book, A Dose of Hope: A Story of MDMA-Assisted Psychotherapy. TYou are invited: JOIN OUR ONLINE COMMUNITY HERE Support the show AND get access to many cool neuronerd things… including your own private feed that has no ads and tons of extra episodes. Transcript: Psychedelic-Assisted Therapy With Dr. Dan Engle Dan Engle MD, Author of Dose of Hope, A Story of MDMA Assisted Psychotherapy Edited (for clarity): Welcome aboard, Dr. Dan. We’re so happy that you agreed to join us. Thanks for having me on, Sue. It’s going to be so nice. We’re going to have an expert who

Everyone is familiar with reacting “in the heat of the moment,” but do we really understand what that means? Regulation basics include the protection or connection pathways to interpersonal relating. Get 2 months free with this link! In this episode, Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley unravel the mystery behind our nervous systems auto-pilot settings: protection vs connection. They simplify otherwise complex ideas by breaking in to 2 main points. Becoming aware whether you are in the Protection/Defense versus Connection/Secure pathways in our nervous system helps us manage them. Also, how does our story affect how we react and deal with conflict, and how can we mitigate it? Tune in for this insightful and eye-opening discussion on our internal working models when interacting with others. Show Notes about regulation and the protection or connection pathways: 00:00 Understanding our internal working model 01:05 Our body responds so much faster than our mind 03:11 The story we tell amplifies the body’s response 05:30 Story vs State: Protective System and the Relational Connective System 08:11 Awareness of our state and identifying the tells of a protective system 16:12 The awareness of self in the presence of another, the relational system 17:49 Our smartest brain 19:30 Tells when you’re in a relational, connective, and reflective place 25:21 Tolerating difficult emotions 29:32 Use your own name to identify yourself 31:24 Ways to calm your body down 36:40 Pre-emptive strike; we get defensive because of the threat inside of our body 39:26 Positive interpretation of a story 41:02 Conclusion FULL TRANSCRIPT BELOW Keep scrolling – Important Links: Steve Porges, of course! We have tons of stuff on Polyvagal Theory in our library, but here is a previous episode with Dr. Steve Porges directly, plus it includes lot’s of other resources click here! Great regulation PDF resource by former guest, Deb Dana – Rhythm of Regulation If you enjoyed this content, please send it on to somebody you feel could use it. Word of mouth helps the podcast grow so more people can benefit from this free resource. Sharing is caring they say, and so are ratings and reviews! 🙂 Help support Therapist Uncensored by becoming a Premium member. Join our private Neuronerd community and support the production of this indie-produced cis-female led show! As a bonus to helping spread this content, you will receive all episodes ad-free, deep dive premium episodes, access to reading and learning opportunities, extra episodes, plus of course discounts on everything we produce. We love options so we are giving you a choice: if you are more visual and prefer direct communication and staying closely in touch with our activities join here: https//www.Patreon.com/therapistuncensored. If you love listening to additional content and prefer to easily download bonus audio content to your normal feed, join us here: https://www.therapistuncensored.com/join. Either way, you will be part of our Neuronerd community and receive all of the ad-free episodes and bonuses. Platinum level Neuronerds and Benefactors meet with us, personally and get their own thank you page on our website!     Join our Neuronerd online community – click the image above! Protection or Connection Nervous System Regulation Pathways, Ep 166 Transcript When we talk about understanding ourselves, we talk about it through understanding the spectrum and our internal working model. Let’s simplify it. What do you think? It’s simplified but it’s also going deeper. I would almost call it going deeper. We start getting interested in colors, up and down is it dorsal vagal, ventral vagal or whatever. Your idea of deep-diving into the basics of this is what I love about the way you talk about it because it feels so usable. Recognizing what internal working model that we function in is important but every day, our body is responding to our environment and to itself. What do you mean responding to itself? You know how we’re always talking about story follows state. In fact, we might even start there. People always say, “What do you mean by story follows state?” What does that mean? There’s a part where our body responds so much faster in our minds. We say this all the time on our show but we give way too much credit to that frontal lobe of ours and the story that we’re telling. An example is we’re having this crappy time at work and we’re so stressed. All we can think about is how sucky the people are that we work with or the job we have and that’s causing us to feel anxious and bad. Our story is people at work are bad, my job is bad and that’s why I feel anxious and upset. Regulation We go, “Here it goes again. We have another meeting.” We then begin to look for information that supports our story. That’s the repetitive nature we talked about, that habitual when we feel trapped by the repetitive, the prediction and now we k

Social emotional learning for all of us – brain breaks not timeouts recommended Join our online community! Brain breaks and the 3 C’s for connecting. Whether you’re a parent balancing life in the pandemic or a teacher managing highly emotional kids, this episode is a resource for you. Co-host Dr. Ann Kelley and child specialist, Lindsey Kealey dive into strategies for teaching kids how to regulate their emotions and promote positive connection with others, called social emotional learning. Linsey Kealey has developed a trauma-based, neuroscience-informed program that uses social emotional learning and problem-solving strategies to help all of us make positive decisions and thrive in our relationships. She utilizes the Three C’s method, connect, calm and collaborate, to help transform the way we interact with ourselves and others. They discuss the three C method of connection to help cultivate healthy relationships and positive development in our children. . Our guest today Lindsey Kealey is a University instructor of human development and family sciences and education at Oregon State University. She is the author of PAWsitive Choices Social and Emotional Learning and the host of The PAWsitive Choices Podcast. Lindsey earned a Bachelor’s of Science in Human Development and Family Sciences with an emphasis in child development and holds a Masters of Arts in Teaching. Her university work, as well as her experience coaching families and teachers, helped her craft a curriculum that integrates interpersonal neurobiology, trauma-responsive practices, and problem-solving to help children thrive. Lindsey Kealey working with social emotional learning More about PAWsitive Choices… PAWsitive Choices is a comprehensive social and emotional learning program for families and schools that teaches children how to regulate emotions, make positive choices, learn from mistakes, and collaboratively solve problems. This trauma-responsive curriculum equips educators and caregivers with practical tools and strategies to help strengthen relationships and promote resilience. Show Transcript Lindsey: So we almost think that this is going to take a lot of time, but in the long run, you’ll find yourself having to teach less and less because they’re learning those skills. They’re internalizing them. So it can feel counterintuitive of well man setting up a brain break kid or teaching my child about problem solving. It is a task. It is something to do, but not only is it going to make them more successful and thrive, it’s going to help make our lives easier. And I think that’s motivating for adults. Today’s session on social emotional learning begins right now with Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott. Ann: Hi, welcome to the show. I’m here with Lindsey Kealey. Lindsey: Thanks for having me. Ann: I’m so glad to have you. So you are a social, emotional learning specialist for children. Is that right? Lindsey: That’s correct. Ann: Well, Lindsey, tell us a little bit about yourself. Lindsey: I am an Instructor of education and also human development and family science. With an emphasis in early childhood education. And I am a fellow neuro nerd. I love your podcast. It resonates with me so much. So I’m just really passionate about translating the science just as your podcast does to help, not only my university students and graduate students, but also families and elementary educator. So I like to synthesize the science that’s out there about our personal neurobiology and then infuse that both in my college courses and then also with family coaching. And when I go and coach in elementary schools, so it’s really just an honor and privilege to get to work with so many different people in different sectors and disseminate this great information about how we can better connect with you. Ann: And we need to continue to disseminate that for the young humans out there, because, you know, as a parent myself, all the information I could have used when my kids were younger, to help them deal with those huge, big emotions that they can have and you know, how to cope and really learn how to get ahold of themselves and to connect to other people. So when I took a look at your curriculum, I was really excited to have you on the show. Lindsey: Thank you. It’s really a neat position that we’re in, whether we’re educators or parents, or even just as we’re connecting with our partners. If someone doesn’t have children in their life, it’s a beautiful opportunity for us to get to better understand ourselves and kind of our emotional landscape. And then how that translates to. Who we’re connecting with and how we can practice that empathy and then help others understand what’s happening within them. If they’re experiencing strong feelings. And that’s something that I always talk about with my students and oth

Join our online community! Using neuroanatomy and her experience having a massive stroke that took her self-conscious mind, Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor and Sue Marriott discuss the 4 skill subsets in the brain that help us relate to ourselves and the world. Her TED Talk was the first one to ever go viral and has been viewed now 27 million times, so her ideas are clearly inspiring. Her new work brings together psychology, neurobiology and spiritual awakening. NOTE Dec, 2021: We will be releasing deeper dive episodes of Jill Bolte-Taylor’s work and explore Whole Brain Living together on our private feed (only $5/mo). In addition, once we get through the book, we will have a live discussion all together in Jan, 2022. Join us by clicking the image to the right or go to www.therapistuncensored.com/join Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor is a Harvard-trained neuroanatomist who suffered a stroke that led her on a path to rediscovering her brain. Her viral TED Talk, “My stroke of insight,” was the inspiration for her first book, My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey. Now she’s back to offer a deeper insight into the inner workings of the mind with her latest book, Whole Brain Living: The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life. In this episode, she dives deep into how the four distinct parts of our brain dictate how we live and be in the world. She gives great insight on how we can create anatomy by truly getting to know these four characters and owning our power. Tune in for this interesting and eye-opening discussion that could change the way you live your life. Show Notes: 00:00:00 Introduction 00:03:30 The Beginnings Of Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor 00:06:18 On her viral TedTalk 00:08:17 What science can’t explain 00:10:10 Left hemisphere vs right hemisphere 00:14:51 From My Stroke of Insight To Whole Brain Living, the individual in the left brain vs the individual in the right brain 00:19:40 The Four Characters: Character 1(top-left) & 2(left lower limbic) 00:31:38 How your brain can change the narrative 00:36:00 Regulation in the limbic system 00:40:53 The Four Characters: Character 3(right lower limbic) & 4(top-right) 00:50:08 The BRAIN Huddle and our personal power to choose how we want to be 01:00:40 What’s next for Dr. Jill 01:02:27 The harmony of all Characters as the evolution of humanity 01:04:08 How to contact Dr. Jill 01:06:41 Psychedelics and connection with the planet 01:09:50 More on how to contact Dr. Jill Hear more psychology and neuroscience in previous episodes: Episode 93 Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Stephen Porges Episode 110 Story Follows State (more polyvagal theory) with Deb Dana Episode 117 Resilience Trauma and the Brain with Dr. Bruce Perry — Listen to the podcast here: Whole Brain Living – Psychology + Neuroanatomy + Spirit with Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor Transcript: Ann Kelley: You are going to be blown away by this episode with Jill Bolte Taylor. We didn’t find out until after the interview that Oprah Winfrey named her as one of her all-time favorite guests and you’re going to see why. This episode is a conversational mix of fascinating life stories, insights about neuroanatomy and psychology and good inspiration. Jill Bolte Taylor is a Harvard-trained neuroanatomist who started her career researching the brain and mental illness but she suffered a stroke on the left hemisphere of her brain. Through her experience of the stroke itself and her recovery, she continues to bring some of the most amazing insights regarding brain function and Whole Brain Living: The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life. Her TED Talk was the very first one to go viral, I believe, with almost 28 million views. In this episode, my cohost, Sue Marriott, explores her thoughts on what made her message take off and what she was tapping into that people needed. After her first book called My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey, she was awarded Time Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People in the World. When we got ahold of her new book, Whole Brain Living, we knew it was exactly the material our readers would want. We are thrilled she accepted Sue’s invitation to come to the show. We’re going to be organizing a Therapist Uncensored reading pod for this new book for our supporters, our Neuronerd community. We will try at some point to put together something for the public on how to apply this material but we’re going to start with our Neuronerd community. This is a great time to jump in and become a show supporter if you haven’t already because not only will you get things like this reading pod as well as an ad-free podcast. Most importantly, hopefully, you’re also going to be helping Sue and I produce this great content for you and many across the globe who might not otherwise be able to run into it. If you can, we would appreciate it. Join us at www.TherapistUncensored.co

Join our online community here! Breaking down the nitty-gritty of attachment and assessment! There were so many exciting moments in the previous interview with Carol George that we couldn’t help but sit down and get into with you. We use excerpts from Episode 162, TU162: Adult Attachment Projective (AAP) Assessment & Clinical Use with Dr. Carol George and geek out as we work to continue to learn and incorporate the feedback from this legend in the field of attachment. We also worked to make this sometimes technical material more accessible to everybody, however, we’d still call this episode dense. Yeah, well, good content should not be over-simplified, you are welcome! If you have not had the chance to listen to the previous episode with world-renowned Attachment Assessment pioneer, Dr. Carol George – that’s ok, we cover a lot in this one but you will definitely get the most out of it as a follow up to hearing the original first. Be easy on yourself though, there is no right or wrong way to learn! We are still excited by the exceptional opportunity to learn directly from Dr. George, and for the privilege, we have in getting to sit down with so many incredible experts in the field of Attachment. We thought there was no better way to follow up than to bring you an in-depth session with Ann and Sue to really get into the heart of attachment assessment. Follow along as they explore what attachment really means, how research has evolved, and how it is relevant on a clinical level. Guided by excerpts from the conversation with Dr. George, they share personal stories, and their own knowledge of the topic to give you 40 minutes of insightful, candid conversation to expand your knowledge even greater. You won’t want to miss it! https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/using-the-adult-attachment-projective-aap-assessment-with-carol-george/ You may also enjoy another legend in the direct science and research related to attachment, Dr. Alan Sroufe – https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/attachment-through-the-lifespan-alan-sroufe/ Attachment Assessment Resources Galore!! AAP Flyer – pdf click here to find out more about training on the AAP Clinical Application of the Adult Attachment Projective Adult Attachment Projective PDG article by George & West Assessing Secure Base Behavior and Attachment Security Using the Q-Sort Method The Adult Attachment Projective Picture System: Attachment Theory and Assessment in Adults Use of the Adult Attachment Projective Picture System (AAP) in the Middle of a Long-Term Psychotherapy Dr. Steve Finn TU162: Adult Attachment Projective (AAP) Assessment & Clinical Use with Dr. Carol George Become a neuronerd! Want to dive deeper? Join our private community and get ad-free content, extra episodes and early access to study opportunities. Join now to get 10% off, so go ahead, it’s as little as $5 a month and takes just a couple clicks and you are in! Check out our socials: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn!

Depth session! Learn about the clinical application of the attachment assessment research and the Adult Attachment Interview (AAI) and the Adult Attachment Projective Join us here (AAP) with attachment pioneer, Dr. Carol George. Co-host Sue Marriott sat down with Dr. Carol George to cover a wide variety of topics, from an in-depth analysis on the misconceptions about Strange Situation and what is truly being measured, to the difference between adult attachment research in comparison to developmental attachment research. Dr. George’s impressive years of investigation and personal experiences through her own journey as a parent makes for a fascinating discussion about the truths behind understanding the attachment spectrum. There is a ton of history of how what we know as the attachment spectrum today came to be, and there is no better way to understand this journey than to hear first-hand from one of the pioneers of research. Learn more about why there has been a shift from what we’ve known as “disorganized attachment” and why professionals are adopting the term “dysregulated attachment” to better encompass the experience. Dr. Carol George Who is Carol George? A literal pioneer in the field of attachment assessment Carol George, Ph.D., is Professor Emerita of Psychology at Mills College in Oakland, California, and has been a pioneer in developing attachment assessments for children and adults. George is an internationally renowned attachment expert who was a co-director of the Mills College Infant Mental Health program for 21 years. Working alongside Dr. Main and Dr. Kaplan, her dissertation helped develop the Adult Attachment Interview. She is praised for her work as an author and editor, and is known for her contributions to attachment-based representative assessments like the Caregiving Interview, the Attachment Doll Play Projective Assessment, and “Disorganized Attachment and Caregiving,” alongside Judith Soloman. Her other contributions include “The Adult Attachment Projective Picture System” with Malcolm West. Although retired from being a professor, George is still incredibly active and stays busy being an assistant editor on the editorial board of Attachment and Human Development, as well as Director of the AAP Training Consortium. Her dedication to education is still prevalent as she often hosts extensive clinical consultations to practicing therapists, graduate students, and other students of attachment. Card examples from the Adult Attachment Projective Resources: AAP Flyer – pdf click here to find out more about training on the AAP Clinical Application of the Adult Attachment Projective PDF article by George & West Adult Attachment Projective the book by Dr. Carol George Assessing Secure Base Behavior and Attachment Security Using the Q-Sort Method The Adult Attachment Projective Picture System: Attachment Theory and Assessment in Adults Use of the Adult Attachment Projective Picture System (AAP) in the Middle of a Long-Term Psychotherapy Dr. Steve Finn Like what you’re hearing? Stop and subscribe to the podcast wherever you are listening, and while you are at it, drop us a rating and review – this is the best way to help others discover this incredible content. Looking for more? Join our new online community of like-minded Neuronerds here! Other episodes you’ll enjoy: https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/attachment-through-the-lifespan-alan-sroufe Our socials: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn!  

Season 6 Premiere! Move from defense and fear It’s been a ride, but hosts Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley are back in full force and ready for this exciting season. In this episode, we catch up with you and discuss the depths of the defensive process and how to resource ourselves to put down the walls we don’t even mean to put up. Cis-women are socialized to subsume themselves to others’ needs and Ann and Sue are no exception. They are working on holding their own voice and letting their little light shine freely. Watch this 3 min clip to see what we mean and to get into the spirit yourself! 🙂 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Acfc2gUErI Content-wise, they discuss the difference between cognitive understanding of modern attachment and regulation, and the bottom-up experience of it. We distort information coming in – either by not registering interpersonal information (dismissing/blue side of the spectrum) or by over-interpreting the importance of an exchange (up-regulating with fear). This is an unconscious process that to undo we have to have the courage and the resources to feel the feelings that cause us to defend. They walk through it with you – they don’t just tell you what to do – so join us in understanding our own defensive process. Check out our recent replays for a refresher on each of the attachment styles: TU158 TU159 TU160 Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Premium Feed Subscription – here!

For the third and final episode of our very popular attachment series, we bring you this last replay before we kick off our 6th season. In this episode, Ann and Sue cover the 4th category of what we call the basic attachment spectrum: disorganized attachment. Learn how to bring yourself back to an organized state and focus on forming secure, deeper connections in relationships. Dropping into overwhelm and disorganization happens to everyone at times, and some more than others. When we have been exposed to serious danger, unresolved fright or major loss in such a way that it interferes with healthy coping patterns, we are left to our own to manage the world. In research terms they call this disorganized or unresolved, but we’d like to describe it as squirting squid ink to confuse who we think is the predator and making a run for it. Dropping into overwhelm and disorganization happens to everyone at times, and some more than others. When we have been exposed to serious danger, unresolved fright or major loss in such a way that it interferes with healthy coping patterns, we are left to our own to manage the world. In research terms they call this disorganized or unresolved, but we’d like to describe it as squirting squid ink to confuse who we think is the predator and making a run for it. Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Our new season starts Nov 2, 2021! In the meantime, It is our pleasure to share one of our most popular in our basic attachment series. This is the second of three – 159, 160, 161. Whether it’s new to you or not we hope you enjoy this content and share it with somebody who should hear it or re-listen and reflect. We will be back soon and have been working hard contemplating next steps. Look for us live again early November, we have a great season coming up and more chances for our listeners to interact. Season 6 will pick up where these leave off, and we cannot wait to share more with you. Improve your sense of security and communicate more effectively inside yourself, and with those you love by understand preoccupied/anxious attachment. Begin to learn to manage your body’s reactivity in relationships by learning about preoccupied/anxious attachment and how it relates to unconscious regulation of the brain. Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP discuss the Insecure Preoccupied, or Anxious/Ambivalent side of the attachment spectrum. This discussion can stand alone, but it also continues as a soft Part 2 from last episode TU59: Are You Cool or Just Cut Off – Dismissing Attachment. The hosts begin to really go into how to use the attachment spectrum to identify where you might fall and how to move towards a more secure place. Find out how anxious attachment is formed and passed on, as well as how starting anxious affects relationships later in our adult life. You’ll learn how to manage relationships better by turning inwards and regulating yourself rather than focusing on others to calm you down. Therapist Uncensored co-hosts Kelley and Marriott will also provide basic tips towards identifying where you are on the attachment spectrum and how to move from anxious attachment towards security.   To see the original show notes for this episode, click here. Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support. Tweet

Dismissing/Avoidant Styles of Relating in Adulthood – REPLAY After 5 seasons and over 2 1/2 million downloads, Ann and Sue are realizing they need to bump the podcast UP from hobby status. We will be back soon and will have some news when we do, so look for us on November 2, 2021 for the Season 6 launch. However, in the meantime, we thought we’d keep cycling through some oldies but goodies. The next 3 are extremely popular episodes and Season 6 will pick up where these leave off. ___ It is our pleasure to share one of our most popular in our basic attachment series. This is the first of three – 159, 160, 161. Take a listen, or re-listen and reflect, or share with somebody you know needs to listen. We will be back soon and have been working hard contemplating next steps. Look for us live again early November, we have a great season coming up and more chances for our listeners to interact. Season 6 will pick up where these leave off, and we cannot wait to share more with you. Sometimes you feel secure but really have just learned to cut off from important life-giving emotions. This episode is especially for those “talk to the hand” kind of people or those that love them. You know, the uber-independent, rational, left-brain, excel spreadsheet person that sees others emotions as needy and weak. Co-hosts Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP and Ann Kelley PhD translate decades of research and clinical experience into easy to understand usable points to help you improve your understanding of why people appear so irrational at times. They talk about how internal working models of the world are formed outside of our awareness in our early life and how they get passed forward over time, sometimes causing relationship trouble. Early stress responses and relationships create a pathway, and how we talk not what we say are clues to which pathway we may be on. This episode specifically focuses on the blue side of the spectrum, which you may be familiar from research as Dismissive or Avoidant. To see the original show notes for this episode, click here. Coming soon – Premium content right moving from patreon to supercast: http://www.therapistuncensored.supercast.com Tweet

We are very excited to resurface this episode this week as it is one of our most popular, and it is rich with great content. Follow along as Sue takes a deep dive with Dr. Daniel Brown into complex traumas, the myths behind false memories, and the 3 essential ingredients of effective treatment for many clinical issues. Dr. Brown has been an expert witness in over 200 child sexual abuse cases, and is also known for his work at the International War Crimes Tribunal for his role in developing a standard of evidence for victims of war atrocities. Learn more about how treatment from an attachment perspective can lead to significant and long-term healing. Daniel Brown, Ph.D. is Associate Clinical Professor of Psychology at Harvard Medical School and has served on the faculty for over 38 years. As a senior meditation master, he’s trained and taught with top Indo-Tibetan Bon & Buddhist lamas for over 48 years, including lineage holders of some of the great schools of Buddhism. He is an author of 24 books, and winner of the several awards from the American Psychiatric Association and the American Academy of Psychiatry & Law for outstanding contribution to forensic psychiatry. As a legal expert witness, Dr Brown has testified in over 200 child abuse cases and served as an expert witness for the prosecutors at the International War Crimes Tribunal helping them establish a standard of evidence for victims of war atrocities. Dr. Brown co-developed The Attachment Project based on the foundations of his and Dr. Elliott’s award-winning book Attachment Disturbances in Adults: Treatment for Comprehensive Repair. Together they developed the Three Pillars treatment method that has garnered praise across the scientific and medical community, and he is a recipient of the 2018 Pierre Janet Writing Award. Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

For todays’ replay, we thought it would be a great opportunity to revisit our conversation with renowned psychoanalyst and psychologist, Nancy McWilliams. It can be difficult to verbalize the issues with “evidence-based” models of care, but with McWilliam’s deeper analysis of quality depth-oriented therapies like psychoanalytically-informed and attachment-oriented therapy, she integrates the neurobiological aspect that Freud began, which has now been confirmed. Enjoy! Nancy McWilliams, PhD, ABPP, is Visiting Professor in the Graduate School of Applied and Professional Psychology at Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey, and has a private practice in Flemington, New Jersey. She is on the editorial board of Psychoanalytic Psychology and has authored three classic books on psychotherapy, including the award-winning Psychoanalytic Diagnosis, Second Edition: Understanding Personality Structure in the Clinical Process. Dr. McWilliams is an Honorary Member of the American Psychoanalytic Association and a former Erikson Scholar at the Austen Riggs Center in Stockbridge, Massachusetts. She is a recipient of the Leadership and Scholarship Awards from Division 39 (Psychoanalysis) of the American Psychological Association (APA) and the Hans H. Strupp Award from the Appalachian Psychoanalytic Society, and delivered the Dr. Rosalee G. Weiss Lecture for Outstanding Leaders in Psychology for APA Division 42 (Psychologists in Independent Practice). She has demonstrated psychodynamic psychotherapy in three APA educational videos and has spoken at the commencement ceremonies of the Yale University School of Medicine and the Smith College School for Social Work.   Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

What makes the ins and outs of sexuality so hard to talk about? We’re diving into it in this replay episode, so get ready. We’re talking about all things sex and overcoming the fears of communicating about it. It turns out if couples do talk about sex, the conversation often only covers the frequency, instead of the other important aspects like pleasure (or the lack thereof), fantasies (or the lack thereof), desires (or the lack thereof),thoughts and feelings towards intimacy, and even the basic mechanics as well. Learn more about how to have these understandably anxiety-inducing conversations, and overcome the difficulties of opening up to yourself and your sexual partner with Dr. Ann Kelley, and Dr. Susan Ansorage. Dr. Susan Ansorge is a practicing psychologist in Austin, TX. Her interest, training and experience in working with sexual issues began during her tenure as a staff psychologist at the UT Counseling and Mental Health Center, and has continued through her 17 years of private practice with individuals and couples. Dr. Ansorge was also member of the Austin Women’s Psychotherapy Project, bringing leaders in the field of gender-aware Psychotherapy to the Austin area, as well as presenting locally and nationally on topics in the areas of gender and sexuality as they relate to psychotherapy. Her written work has appeared in the National Center for PTSD Quarterly. Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Shame – a feeling we are all fortunately and unfortunately – familiar with. In this replay episode, Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott sit down with Dr. Stephen Finn and take a deeper dive into the scientific research and biology of this emotion to better understand how such a tough feeling can be both toxic and healthy in life. Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

With everything going on in the world, we thought there was no better time than now to share this replay episode on what can be considered a tough topic. A sad truth is that most of us have not experienced examples of healthy boundary setting, and we have to spend parts of our adult lives learning how to improve this skill. Like any muscle, strong boundary-setting skills are developed instead of innate. If this idea resonates with you – you are going to love this episode featuring the founder of IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin, Dr. Juliane Taylor Shore. Buckle up for a thorough discussion on interpersonal neurobiology and how it relates to boundaries. Enjoy! Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Parenthood can be a real challenge, and with the combination of the pandemic and related shutdowns, balancing daily life and an emotionally and behaviorally challenged child can be quite overwhelming, to say the least. If this feeling resonates with you, we chose this replay episode with you in mind – hoping to offer some support and guidance through these tougher times. In this replay, we will cover areas where many parents go wrong, and what can be done instead by shifting our strategies and improving our households. Learn more about the Nurtured Heart Approach with Dr. Ann Kelley and expert guest, Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester. Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

As we continue this grueling journey through this seemingly never-ending pandemic – it is no surprise when parents share feelings of being overwhelmed, frustrated, and just simply exhausted. Have no fear, we are bringing you this replay episode just in time to offer you some extra support as we all navigate these challenges. We had the privilege of speaking with the father of interpersonal neurobiology, Dan Siegel, and his colleague and our friend, Tina Payne-Bryson. Check out this throwback episode from 2020 – the content is still rich with information and relevance today. Enjoy! Check out our original show notes for this episode, here! And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn! Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Ann and Sue’s reflections on the past 5 seasons with the theme of Growing Security In today’s episode, Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley conclude their fifth season, and it’s all because of our listeners and audience that we’ve been able to maintain our Apple Top 10 Social Science (independently produced!) podcast. We’ve had many brilliant people on for interviews, and today we’re going to talk about some of the highlights of these episodes since it’s unlikely that you may have heard all 150 episodes. We’re doing this podcast because we’re excited about it, we’re passionate about it, and we are creating this content for ANYONE to help you grow security in your life. It’s a GLBTQI+ inclusive, female-led, independently produced show that will always be FREE to everyone (not on paid platforms), and we will try our best to remain AD-FREE thanks to our patrons. The general theme is all about deepening security in yourself and your close relationships. Use the search button on our website to find topics you enjoy. We are working to lift under-represented voices so if you have a recommendation for a guest we may not know about, send us a note. We continue to value sharing the privilege of the mic. As July is BIPOC Mental Health month (see below for resources and detail), we highlight several episodes on Hip Hop, community-based treatment and the story of resilience shared by Alphaso Appleton from Liberia. Looking Back on 150 Episodes to help you grow security in your relationships: TU133: Holding Your Own 1: Messy but Secure Relating On the Holding Your Own series, most frequent comment was an appreciation of basic humility in discussing mental health. Many of you think it’s refreshing that the podcast is about content not about personalities. TU 149: Modern Attachment Regulation Spectrum – An Integrated Model of Change TU130 – The Deep Biology of Love – Oxytocin Unpacked, with Research Pioneer Dr. Sue Carter The fact that Dr. Sue Carter launched the study of oxytocin makes ME happier! TU93: Polyvagal Theory in Action – The Practice of Body Regulation With Dr. Stephen Porges TU110: Story Follows State – Investigating Polyvagal Theory with Guest Deb Dana TU117: Resilience Trauma and the Brain W/ Guest Bruce Perry MD, PhD TU106: What Actually Heals in Therapy with Psychoanalyst Nancy McWilliams The difficult person we struggle with may be evoking the parts of ourselves that we hate. It could be a disowned part that we have shame about, and we’re seeing a mirror. TU141: How We Become the Person’s We Are with Dr. Alan Sroufe, Attachment Through the Lifespan TU56: How We Come to Define Ourselves – Attachment Research Over Decades with Guest Alan Sroufe He talked about getting to know who we are, and our own authentic self. He’s a preminent attachment researcher in the field. TU89: Neurofluency – with Dr. Lou Cozolino, Applied Neuroscience Made Understandable One of the things Lou said that stuck with me was “You have to get in touch with your own flexibility, and tolerate the anxiety of your own ignorance.” TU145: Class, Race, Culture and Attachment, Re-examined It’s about being a good learner TU51: Conquer Shame by Understanding the Science Behind the Feeling, with Guest Expert Dr. Steve Finn TU81: How Good Boundaries Actually Bring Us Closer, with Guest Juliane Taylor Shore She talks about the Jello Wall, between you and something else to help think.. is this about me? TU63: Living with Cancer – The Six Principles of Emotional Healing with Guest Kelly Inselmann TU64: Mindfulness Meditation with Yoga Therapist Kelly Inselmann, Bonus Episode TU42: Sexual Vitality, Refreshing our Understanding of Sexual Health with Doug-Braun Harvey (Part 1 of 2) TU43: Sexual Vitality – Six Principles of Sexual Health with Doug Braun-Harvey (Part 2 of 2) Reframing “losing your virginity” to acknowledging your “sexual awakening”. TU69: Exploring Intersecting Genders – What We Can All Learn with Guest Li Brookens We are proud to be LGBTQ+ welcoming in all of our content. The intersecting gender episode w Li Brookens was really impactful (we wonder if it remains fresh and up to date re: language though since it’s a few years old). TU139: Boys and Sex, Modern Young Men and Sexuality with Peggy Orenstein TU128 – Helping the Intense Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach TU38: The Blended Family – How to Create Strong and Lasting Step-Family Relationships This is a resoruce for anyone dealing with blended families to avoid high conflict through stress. Each position deserves a ton of compassion – the biological parent, the step-parent and the child. TU23: Building Grit Through Self Compassion with Dr. Kristin Neff TU125: Dan Siegel and Tina Payne-Bryson on Presence in Times of Stress TU27: Raising Secure Children With Guest Tina Payne Bryson TU62: The Luv Doc – Dating and Relations