The Topical

Hear what has led 55-year-old Kansas City resident Jonathan Huston to not reading, seeing, or hearing a single verifiable fact since 2014. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you’re feeling a little more forgetful nowadays, you’re not alone. Hear why it could be linked to being blindfolded, thrown into the back of an unmarked van, and taken to a covert CIA bunker for several days at a time. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why a natural, mutual chemistry finally led the two intergalactic lovebirds to making it official. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear how the dramatic increase in grassroots fundraising could help spread the Aryan Brotherhood’s message of racial purity nationwide. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear how Trump’s lawyers plan to aggressively go after the nation’s belongings, and why the American people are likely going to have to pony up. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why United Airlines and customers alike are calling the new Ultra Economy option just as satisfying, comfortable, and safe as any other flight option. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On this Veteran’s Day, The Topical honors one brave service member and his long road back to normalcy after a particularly long and grueling tour of duty. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Host Leslie Price sits down with staff members of The Topical for their annual checkup. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe Biden’s campaign promise of a “rapid pandemic response” may have been what earned him a victory, so why hasn’t he or his administration done anything to solve the crisis in the last 24 hours? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why you probably should have set a back-up alarm because it’s already 11 a.m. and everyone is looking for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why a growing list of targets and scant resources may have more violent alt-right groups biting off more than they can chew. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Stay tuned to OPR for more live 2020 election coverage throughout the night. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Stay tuned to OPR for more live 2020 Election coverage throughout the night. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Stay tuned to OPR for more live 2020 election coverage throughout the night. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why these unmistakably nasty ballots that were used to either wipe off a voter’s face or clean up a spill could affect tonight’s election outcome. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Plus, we’ll sit down with OPR’s immortal election expert who has only predicted 12 of 58 presidential elections correctly, but we still give him some air time every four years anyway. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A pro-Trump voter from rural Missouri. A young, die-hard Democrat from Boston. Can they put their difference aside, and prove that there is more that unites us than divides us? We’ll find out as soon as we unlock the door of the room they’ve been sealed inside of for the last week. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And later, we explain how to properly fill out your mail-in ballot just in case you’re too fucking stupid to figure it out yourself. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why the American populace has never been lucky in leadership, and is now beginning to wonder if they’re the reason they’ve never been able to settle down with someone who’s truly the electable type. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why the high volume of voters in 2020 could pose a massive problem by making our country look like a bunch of pencil-pushing poindexters. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

OPR election expert Patton Oswalt attempts to explain the controversial practice, but this time on a podcast. Will he be able to show voters how gerrymandering affects their ballot without using any of his usual charts or maps? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why even the strictest protocols may not be enough to prevent the spread of The J-Dog with a case full of brewskis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why many Christian pro-life groups are celebrating what they believe could be the judicial power needed to stop pap smears and HPV tests for good. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear where the nation’s incarcerated plan to flee in order to start a safer, quieter life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why the people you thought you were closest with actually don’t feel similarly at all. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why top health officials now believe most of the 200,000 fatalities in the U.S. can be attributed to violent underlying conditions brought on by our nation’s 44th president. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

L’Oréal’s new FaceSmash collection guarantees not to blotch or smear even after you’ve been pancaked by a 20-ton bus hauling ass down the highway. But is it too good to be true? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why increased exposure to highfalutin books in fancy-type settings could cause you to get a little too big for your own britches. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Because, like, we could totally end it tomorrow if we also wanted to be a bunch of tryhard suck-ups like Finland. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Find out how often your local route is disrupted by train conductors unwittingly barreling over screaming lassies as they wave their dainty handkerchiefs in the air for help. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The progressive new policy grants potential fathers eight days to fly out to a taping of the popular daytime talk show so they can determine if they are off the hook for the next 18 years or if their old side piece is trying to trap them out of revenge. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oh yeah, that’s definitely not good. We have the latest on this marsupial that could only have been acquired through some particularly sketchy means. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear how Democratic officials are looking to lure snuggled voters out of their beds and to the polls this fall. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Like, for real. We have the latest on how these two dumbasses reconnected, and you’re not going to believe it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Could there be potential lifeforms lurking in the mysterious void that lies beyond the U.S.? We have the latest on this monumental discovery. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We have the latest on the hot-blooded heartthrob that made landfall two days ago, sweeping hundreds of men and women off their feet. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New data today is backing up claims that pitbull owners, on average, tend to be more aggressive and territorial than owners of German shepherds or rottweilers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why citizens across the globe are displeased with a local nonprofit’s plan to build a new homeless shelter in such close proximity to the planet’s many schools, homes, and parks. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why placing your hands on another person’s hips and swaying rhythmically, even for just a few beats of the drum, can be greatly beneficial for one’s mental health. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Initial timelines have estimated a Covid vaccine could be available by early 2021, but according to the White House, we may have something even sooner. Hear why the Trump administration believes they will have some kind of sharp thing to puncture your skin and inject you with before the election. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear what steps Disney workers are taking to keep parkgoers safe from the bloodthirsty beast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear what led researchers to conclude that the bird of prey is absolutely gaga for booger sugar. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s the simple and surefire way to increase the resale value of your home. We have everything you need to know before making the investment and adding the actor, director, and two-time Sexiest Man Alive. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

After ongoing public outcry from body positivity experts, hear why many popular napkin brands are changing their messaging today and proclaiming that gravy-stained bodies are beautiful. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Part blizzard, part hurricane, part tornado—all destruction. We have the latest on this unprecedented tsunami-hailstorm combination and why many experts believe it could be caused by the villainous Professor Vile and his weather-destabilizing machine. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why many young professionals saddled with student loan debt are struggling to afford basic necessities, like early access to episodes and exclusive content, despite it being priced as low as $5 per month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear the heartwarming story of Troop 242, and why this year they decided to put their Girl Scout cookie proceeds to good use and buy a 2020 Corvette Stingray with a 6-liter V8 engine and 400-plus horsepower. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On the anniversary of the signing of our nation’s Constitution, hear how the newly authenticated diary entries of Ben Franklin point to his revolutionary theory that electricity could be harnessed from lightning and trained to flow from the clouds to his erect penis, providing immense pleasure. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Americans stand united today in their call for television programs to go back to the days when all episodes began with a catchy tune and lyrics that explained the entire concept of the show and its characters. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear why the NRA believes Bugs Bunny’s long history of curtailing the Second Amendment rights of Elmer Fudd and Yosemite Sam by twisting their firearms in a big bow qualifies the cartoon rabbit for their lowest possible rating. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices