The Best of You

Are you always the one taking care of and fixing problems for everyone else? Today, I'm taking a deep dive into the heart of overfunctioning—exploring why so many of us feel compelled to take on excessive responsibilities, often at the cost of our own well-being. I delve into parentification, which I believe often lies at the root of overfunctioning. I also share how understanding these dynamics through Mel Robbins' "Let Them Theory" can offer powerful insights for change. Whether you're tired of always being 'the responsible one' or you're seeking to understand your deep-seated need to please others, this discussion will clarify the roots of these behaviors and guide you toward a path of healing and freedom. Here’s what we cover: *What is overfunctioning, and how does it impact your life? *How childhood parentification fuels overfunctioning in adulthood *5 clear signs you were parentified as a child *3 practical steps to start healing *How Mel Robbins’ Let Them Theory transforms boundary setting Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 5: What is Codependency and Why Does it Matter? Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What’s the secret to healing marriage struggles and fostering deep connection? In this heartfelt and incredibly vulnerable conversation, Ron and Nan Deal share their journey of rebuilding a marriage that almost unraveled. Drawing from their new book, The Mindful Marriage, they reveal how understanding and managing your own pain cycles can transform relationships. Whether you’re married, single, or navigating any relationship, this episode offers profound wisdom and practical tools for emotional and personal growth. Episode Highlights: * Explore one couple's journey through shame, blame, and rediscovering connection. * Learn 4 Pain Cycles that disrupt relationships and how to break free from them. * Uncover practical steps to nurture your relationship’s “us-ness” without losing yourself. * Learn what to do when you're willing to do the work—but your partner isn't. Get your copy of The Mindful Marriage here. Take the free assessment Ron and Nan mention in the episode here. For more insights and tools for emotional and relational health, subscribe to Dr. Alison’s weekly email newsletter here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 115: 4 Ways to Transform Your Relationship: Expert Tips to Heal Pain Points and Deepen Intimacy Thanks to our sponsors: Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Get ahead of the New Year with a routine that helps you now by going to Seed.com/BESTOFYOU and use code 25BESTOFYOU to get 25% off your first month. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you experience loving attachment when trauma leaves you feeling shattered? In this incredibly profound and insightful episode, therapist and author of the brand new book, Sacred Attachment, Michael Cusick joins us to explore how our darkest moments of brokenness are not just moments of pain, but pivotal opportunities for forming a deeper, more secure attachment with God. Michael shares about his own healing journey as a result of complex trauma, and we unpack how our pain can bring us even closer to encounters with God’s love. Today’s episode is for everyone who has ever felt broken. We discuss. . . *5 way of understanding brokenness (and why the "sin" paradigm falls short) *Why mystical encounters are for all of us *A jaw-dropping moment when Michael experienced God's love *The role of imagination in healing *How to restore exiled and wounded parts of us Order Sacred Attachment Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 16: What are Attachment Styles and Why Does it Matter? Thanks to our sponsors: Go to organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feeling exhaustion or post-holiday blues? How can we step into the New Year feeling refreshed and empowered? ‍ In this honest and vulnerable conversation, spiritual director and author Anjuli Paschall and I unpack our own journeys through holiday people-pleasing and how to reset for the New Year. As we close out the year, many of us grapple with a mix of relief and disappointment, compounded by the pressure of New Year's resolutions and the desire to start fresh. Anjuli offers her expert guidance on understanding these dynamics and introduces practical steps and spiritual practices to help us move forward with hope and clarity. ‍ Here’s what we cover:‍ * How to break free from holiday people-pleasing * The #1 way to stop trying to control other people’s feelings * Why post-holiday let down happens & what to do * How to develop and cultivate aspirational feelings in your body * Why the hope of a new year sometimes hurts & how to navigate those feelings * Prayers to move through complicated emotions Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 30: Protecting What’s Good Without Denying What’s Hard at the Holidays Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you curious about how science and spirituality intersect in understanding and treating mental health conditions like OCD? This week, therapist and spiritual director Ryan Kuja shares his incredible journey through the complex world of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). From a young age, Ryan battled intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors. Feeling isolated and overwhelmed, at 17, he cried out to God—a pivotal moment that launched him into an unexpected exploration of mysticism, neurobiology, and the intricacies of diagnosis. This episode is designed for everyone, whether you or someone you love is dealing with OCD, or you're simply interested in gaining a deeper understanding of the diverse human experience. Here’s what we cover: * Ryan recounts the pivotal moment at 17 when his struggle with OCD drove him to seek divine intervention * The difference between OCD and common intrusive thoughts—what sets them apart? * An overview of the latest and most effective treatments for OCD, from clinical approaches to innovative therapies * Ryan shares the spiritual practices that have not only helped manage his OCD but also enriched his spiritual journey Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 129: Understanding Your Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm, Advocating For Yourself, and Cultivating Inner Resilience Episode 51: The 12 Common Thinking Traps, Mind Reading, Mental Filters, and How To Stop Taking Things Personally Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Turn back time on the appearance of your skin with Purity Woods’s Age-Defying Dream Cream. Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you move from feeling stuck to finding meaning and healing in your grief? In today’s episode, I’m honored to speak with David Kessler, one of the world’s foremost experts on grief and the author who expanded Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s original five stages of grief by adding a sixth stage: meaning. We explore how common reactions like avoidance, blame, and bargaining are a normal part of the grieving process, and how finding meaning can be a transformative step toward healing. Whether you’re grieving a loss or supporting someone who is, this conversation will help you better understand the continuum of grief and the power of creating meaning. Here's what we cover: * The 5 stages of grief and how different parts of us experience loss * David’s 6th stage of grief and how it developed out of his own story * The most important question to ask someone who is grieving * David’s 7 guidelines for creating meaning after loss * Why grief is intimately linked to joy Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you feel like you’re constantly caring for others, whether it’s aging parents, your kids, or even your career—and there’s little time left for you? Women in the sandwich generation, particularly those aged 35-54, report higher stress levels than any other age group. If you’re juggling a heavy load of responsibilities as you care for others, you’re not alone. In this episode, you’ll gain practical tools to help you navigate this season with compassion and healthy boundaries, empowering you with the support and nourishment you need. Here's what we cover: * Why caring for others can stir up unresolved emotions and how to address them * 3 key strategies to help you through stressful seasons * The antidote for constant guilt * How to set boundaries that protect your emotional well-being * Practical ways to invite God into your daily routine Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 6: Do I Really Have an Inner Child? What It Means to Reparent Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/bestofyou! Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do the holidays bring a mix of joy and complicated emotions for you? We're supposed to feel grateful, and parts of us do. But other parts of us feel nostalgic, driven by guilt, exhausted, or even angry. In this honest, vulnerable conversation, author and spiritual director Anjuli Paschall joins me to explore the emotions that surface during the holiday season. We talk about how to navigate these feelings with grace, and how these emotions can be gifts in disguise. We cover. . . * How to distinguish between true guilt and false guilt * The surprising connection between anger and exhaustion * Why nostalgia can be both comforting and bittersweet * Practical ways to honor all your feelings during this emotionally complex season * Anjuli’s practice of praying through complicated emotions and finding God’s presence in them Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 30: Protecting What’s Good Without Denying What’s Hard at the Holidays Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever wondered if someone you know might be on the autism spectrum—or even questioned it about yourself? Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is often misunderstood, misdiagnosed, or even missed entirely, especially in those who don’t fit common stereotypes. In this episode, neuropsychologist Dr. Donna Henderson joins us to unpack the complexities of autism, neurodiversity, and how we can better understand and support those around us. What You’ll Learn: * The 7 key criteria for identifying autism * When to pursue a neuropsychological evaluation * Why talk therapy often falls short for neurodivergent individuals * How someone can exhibit an "autistic nervous system" without having ASD * Practical ways to support loved ones This conversation will deepen your understanding of neurodiversity and help you see the world - and those you love - in a new light. Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 129: Understanding Your Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm, Advocating For Yourself, and Cultivating Inner Resilience Episode 85: The Goal of a Healthy Family & 6 Roles We Take On In Dysfunction Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever feel stuck in anxious thoughts? Are you longing for more moments of calm throughout your day? Every single one of us has a relationship with anxiety. The goal isn't to eradicate anxiety; it’s to work with anxiety to create more peace and balance in our lives. In this episode, I guide you through a clear, step-by-step understanding of your relationship with anxiety. Whether you’re navigating your own anxious moments or supporting loved ones, you'll learn how to identify root causes and key insights needed to find calm and clarity. Here’s what we’ll cover: * How to understand your unique experience with anxiety * Key root causes of anxiety, including genetics, personality, and environment * The impact of High Sensitivity (HSP) and neurodivergence on anxiety * 3 practical techniques to calm anxiety and cultivate strong internal leadership Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 54: Can I Pray My Anxiety Away? A Surprising Approach to the Anxiety Pandemic & How to Walk Yourself & Your Kids Through It with Curtis Chang Episode 109: Healing Burdens From the Past—How to Overcome Childhood Wounds and Heal Your Younger Self with Tammy Sollenberger Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you carrying burdens that aren't entirely your own? Could understanding your family's past be the key to unlocking a healthier future? In this powerful episode, we dive into the concept of generational trauma with my guest, Gina Birkemeier, therapist and author of the book & workbook, “Generations Deep”. Gina shares her personal and professional insights on how deep-seated family issues can affect us and how both faith and therapy play pivotal roles in healing and breaking these cycles. You'll learn. . . * What generational trauma is and how it subtly influences our lives * Why Gina realized that she needed therapy and Jesus * What epigenetics is and how our genes remember & sometimes inherit the trauma of previous generations * How to understand cycle breaking & to end the cycle of dysfunction * About the legacy burdens we carry from our family's past. Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 127: Healing Childhood Wounds—The Enmeshed Family & 5 Toxic Patterns that Affect Your Ability to Thrive in Adult Relationships Episode 101: I Shouldn’t Feel Angry—Exploring the Violence that Shapes Our Family Stories & How to Heal with Lisa Jo Baker Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are patterns from your past influencing how you show up in relationships today? In this episode, we explore how early family dynamics—like criticism, control, & emotional immaturity—shape our adult relationships. This process isn’t about placing blame but about building awareness of behaviors that impact self-worth, boundaries, and relational health. By naming these patterns, we open a path to greater confidence, healthier connections, autonomy, and healing. In this episode, we cover: * The two essential ingredients for building secure parent-child attachment * The role of enmeshment and individuation in emotional health * 5 common parenting patterns that disrupt secure attachment * 5 questions to assess how these patterns may be impacting you today * Practical steps to heal and change Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Have a question or an episode idea? Leave them here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: The Best of You: Break Free From Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, and Discover Your True Self In God Episode 109: Healing Burdens From the Past—How to Overcome Childhood Wounds and Heal Your Younger Self with Tammy Sollenberger Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Turn back time on the appearance of your skin with Purity Woods’s Age-Defying Dream Cream. Purity Woods is currently offering 17% off sitewide but we have an additional 10% discount for our listeners for a total savings of 27%! Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you know that by adulthood, most people have experienced some form of sexual wounding? Today's conversation with Sam Jolman, therapist and author of the new book, "The Sex Talk You Never Got," is one of my absolute all-time favorites. Why? It truly surprised me. It’s so rare to find a nuanced conversation about sex—especially in a world where we’re constantly tugged between a reductive view of “purity” and an equally reductive sense of “permissiveness.” This conversation is packed with absolute gems—there’s depth, wisdom, and healing in every moment that’s relevant to all of us, no matter our stories. Here’s what we dive into: - How to establish safety, consent, and trust in intimate relationships - An eye-opening statistic from Harvard about what kids long for from their parents on the topic of sex - How to have a truly meaningful “sex talk” with your kids - What God actually desires from us when it comes to sex - Sam's advice for those who’ve experienced sexual wounding or brokenness and want to begin the healing process Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 125: Recovering From Purity Culture: Dismantle the Myths, Reject Shame-Based Sexuality, and Move Forward in Your Faith with Dr. Camden Morgante Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get an additional 15% off Fatty 15's 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's episode is a fascinating conversation about the phenomenon of "purity culture." You've heard the phrase, but my guest today, licensed therapist and purity culture expert, Dr. Camden Morgante, is here to explain exactly what it was and how it created a culture of shame, fear, and coercion around sex, especially for women. We explore the damaging myths purity culture perpetuated and the ways it continues to affect women and married couples, especially around issues of intimacy and self-worth. Dr. Camden shares essential insights on how to heal from these harmful messages and move forward in faith, while also offering practical advice for anyone struggling with shame-based sexuality. Key Takeaways: - What purity culture is and its lasting impact on Millennials and Gen X - The 5 damaging myths, including the "gatekeeper," "damaged goods," & "flipped switch" - The most important strategy for couples dealing with disappointment around sex - The real meaning of intimacy beyond physical connection - Dr. Camden’s practical advice for overcoming shame and reclaiming your faith Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 48: Loving Your Body as a Spiritual Practice, Why the Flesh Isn’t the Body, and 3 Heresies We Kind of Believe Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’ve ever struggled to set boundaries or wondered why it’s so hard to respect them in others, this episode is for you. We dive deep into how to set and receive healthy boundaries, and why so many of us confuse healthy limits with toxic behaviors. Spoiler: setting boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s necessary for healthy, thriving relationships. But that’s not all. When our boundaries are shaky, complicated emotions—like guilt, resentment, or anxiety—often arise. And instead of dealing with them, many of us reach for quick fixes: we numb. We avoid confronting those tough feelings that boundaries bring to the surface. Today, I’ll break down why we numb, how to recognize it, and the steps you can take to stop avoiding your emotions and start healing. This episode covers: * The difference between healthy boundaries and toxic behaviors * How to communicate boundaries without guilt or shame * Practical ways to receive boundaries from others gracefully * How to recognize when you’re numbing emotions (and what to do about it) * Why boundaries and emotional numbing are deeply connected—and how to untangle them You deserve relationships that nourish you, not drain you. This episode will help you understand the power of boundaries and guide you toward emotional freedom. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 24: Boundaries, the Spectrum of Toxicity, and a Note About Evil Episode 26: How to say "No" to toxicity Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Healing What's Within by Chuck DeGroat is now available wherever books are sold. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do after someone hurts you? How do you heal the pain that lingers inside of you? This is such an incredibly helpful, honest and vulnerable conversation with my friend and fellow therapist Chuck DeGroat, author of the brand new book Healing What's Within. Chuck taught us so much about the harmful realities of narcissism in his book, When Narcissism Comes to Church, and now he's helping us heal the lingering wounds. Here’s what we cover: 1. The moment that launched 5 years of inner chaos for Chuck 2. 3 surprising questions God asks to each of us 3. How Adam & Eve were manipulated 4. The first step when dealing with narcissism 5. How take feedback from others 6. How to ask for what you need from others Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Pre-order Healing What’s Within: Coming Home to Yourself--and to God--When You're Wounded, Weary, and Wandering If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Has anxiety ever made it hard for you to connect with God? Do you love God but sometimes struggle with church? Today's episode is such a breath of fresh air. I had the pleasure of diving into a deep, insightful conversation with New York Times bestselling author John Mark Comer. We explore the powerful intersection of mental, emotional, and spiritual health, uncovering how these aspects work together to create a whole, integrated person. Here’s what we cover:‍ 1. Misconceptions in the church about true discipleship 2. The benefits and limits of therapy for personal growth 3. What to do when anxiety or past trauma make it hard to engage spiritual practices 4. John Mark’s candid experiences with therapy and what he’s learned 5. The two essential spiritual practices for holistic well-being 6. Our thoughts on the overlapping circles of emotional & spiritual maturity Listen to Dr. Alison Cook discuss fasting with John Mark Comer on the Rule of Life Podcast Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 67: The Link Between Faith & Emotional Healing—Gen Z, College Life, & A Hidden Search for Meaning with Cindy Gao Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all face doubt, disappointment, and even disillusionment at times. In today’s episode, I’m sharing with you my framework for cultivating a vibrant inner spirituality—one that doesn’t bypass or exile the hard parts of this faith journey. Here’s what I cover: 1. The surprising secret to emotionally resilient faith 2. What is an inner family of parts? 3. Research on different faith orientations 4. The 5 languages (e.g. parts!) of faith 5. How to honor (& lead) each of these parts Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Have questions? Leave them for me here! Sign up for my weekly email and get free resources here If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Boundaries For Your Soul Series on Youtube Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today’s conversation is a fascinating deep-dive into celebrity culture with Katelyn Beaty, editor and author of Celebrities For Jesus: How Personas, Platforms, & Profits are Hurting the Church. We explore the dynamics of celebrity culture and its profound effects on both the church and our personal sense of worth and mission. Here’s what we cover: 1. The importance of developing an inner locus of control 2. How celebrity culture impacts the church 3. Parasocial relationships & influencers as attachment figures 4. Reevaluating what true success looks like 5. How to discern trustworthiness in people you follow Check out Katelyn's book Celebrities for Jesus here Find Katelyn's conversation with Chuck DeGroat on celebrity and narcissism here Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 119: Drawing Strength from the Past —The Spirit of Justice: True Stories of Faith, Race, and Resistance with Dr. Jemar Tisby Thanks to our sponsors: Register for Broken to Beloved Conference Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It was an absolute honor to sit down with New York Times bestselling author & public historian Dr. Jemar Tisby for an incredibly rich conversation about his brand new book,The Spirit of Justice. We discuss his own story of coming to faith and what led him to explore stories of Black Christians who tirelessly pursued healing, goodness, and justice against impossible odds. Here’s what we cover: 1. The impact of culture on mental & emotional health 2. The double-edged sword of religion 3. The dissonance Jemar felt as a Black Christian in predominantly white settings 4. The lifelines who helped him shore up his faith 5. What is the spirit of justice? 6. Jemar’s thoughts on therapy 7. What stories of resistance teach us about following Jesus Get Jemar Tisby's new book The Spirit of Justice here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today, Cindy and I are tackling your questions about therapy, shedding light on research, common challenges, and insights to help you on your own healing journey! Here's what we cover: 1. Which modality should I use (DBT / CBT / IFS / EMDR)? (4:30) 2. What is the most important factor in getting results? (8:53) 3. What is trauma-informed therapy? (10:07) 4. How do therapists deal with getting triggered by a client? (16:03) 6. What if I’m “too much” for my therapist? (21:51) 7. Does therapy take the role of sin too lightly? (24:28) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 67: The Link Between Faith & Emotional Healing—Gen Z, College Life, & A Hidden Search for Meaning with Cindy Gao Episode 70: Mastering the Art of Emotional Intelligence—How to Harness the Power of Your Emotions to Improve Your Relationships Episode 23: Am I wounded or am I sinful? Episode 113: A New Vision of Human Flourishing—A Christian Approach to Mental Health with Duke University Psychiatrist & Theologian Warren Kinghorn Thanks to our sponsors: Register for the Broken to Beloved Conference today Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever felt like you’ve grown and healed, but the people around you haven’t? In today’s episode, I’m joined by my friend and therapist, Dr. Monique Gadson, for a powerful conversation about how to ignite change not only within ourselves but also within the systems we're deeply connected to—whether that's our families, churches, or work environments. Here’s what we cover: 1. Dr. Monique’s insights from her work as a therapist within a church setting (8:06) 2. The difference between toxic cultures and imperfect human gatherings (17:00) 3. How kindness can sometimes hinder growth (29:07) 4. How to be "in" but not "of" a system (36:04) 5. The effects of culture-wide PTSD (38:35) 6. Practical ways to find and nurture hope (43:45) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 33: People Pleasing & Developing Your Own Inner Compass—Thoughts on Depression, Mental Health & the Church, and Finding Hope in Dark Places w/ Dr. Monique Gadson Episode 60: How to Make New Friends, Identify Red & Green Flags, & Extract Yourself From an Unhealthy Situation w/ Aundi Kolber & Dr. Monique Gadson Episode 73: True Belonging vs. Groupthink, Cliques, & Trying to Fit In—How to Belong to Others While Staying True To Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Register for the Broken to Beloved Conference here Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39% Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you grow up in a blended family? Are you navigating the complexities of creating one? Blended families face unique challenges, and it can be overwhelming to sift through the stigmas and bad advice that often surround step-parenting. In today’s very personal episode, I’m joined by blended family expert Ron Deal. Together, we explore how step-families can become a powerful part of God’s redemptive story, offering healing and hope in the midst of grief, loss, and complicated circumstances. Today’s episode is filled with powerful tips for ANY family about how to become healthier. Here’s what we cover: 1. The two key ingredients to building and sustaining a healthy family (8:39) 2. Common sources of dysfunction in families and how to address them (11:32) 3. What the church often misunderstands about blended families and how we can shift the narrative (25:00) 4. The redemptive power of step-families in transforming pain into purpose. (36:53) 5. Empowering children to navigate change and loss with resilience (29:41) 6. Practical ways to honor grief within families and create a supportive environment (41:39) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 85: The Goal of a Healthy Family & 6 Roles We Take On In Dysfunction Episode 12: Overcoming the Pain of Divorce with Eryn Eddy Thanks to our sponsors: Register for the upcoming Broken to Beloved conference! Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you want to learn how to strengthen your relationship over time? Do you want to have better communication and deeper intimacy with your partner? In this very honest episode, you'll learn strategies from top marriage & relationship experts combined with Biblical wisdom to work through pain paints, set realistic expectations, and practice constructive conversations with your partner. Here’s what we cover: 1. The most important way to improve your relationship (6:11) 2. How to identify bad advice vs. a helpful confidant (13:34) 3. Naming paint points in a healthy way (15:12) 4. 3 ways to frame a relational pain point (24:34) 5. The 4 most destructive qualities to a relationship (29:04) 6. The 4 most important skills to a vital long-term relationship (32:24) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 105: 4 Lies We Tell, the Mental Health Benefits of Honesty, & How to Stop Lying In Your Relationships Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you struggle to let go of pain from your past? If so, you do not want to miss today's episode! Kobe Campbell is a trauma therapist and the author of Why am I Like This? She joins me today to discuss her own journey through healing and insight from her work as a trauma therapist. Here’s what we cover: 1. Kobe’s personal experience with trauma (4:10) 2. The burden she picked up as a twin (7:59) 3. How she found a therapist (12:37) 4. Can you heal from trauma? (23:30) 5. Kobe’s favorite tools for healing trauma (26:49) 6. How to advocate for yourself with a therapist (38:10) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 4: What Do I Need To Know About Trauma? Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 40% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why do I struggle with mental health? How do I respond to Christians who claim there's no such thing as mental illness? What does my mental health diagnosis mean? If you've asked any of these questions, you don't want to miss today's episode! Join me as I discuss these crucial topics with Duke University psychiatrist and theologian, Warren Kinghorn, a leading expert in integrating Christian faith and mental health. Here’s what we cover: Does anxiety come from inside of me or outside of me? (7:22) The most important questions we must answer as human beings (11:03) What are the 7 benchmarks of mental health? (30:57) What is a Christian vision of flourishing? (34:27) Warren’s response to John MacArthur’s claims that there is no such thing as mental illness (41:08) How to think about diagnoses & what to look for in a clinician (46:23) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love Episode 45: Strong like Water—Finding the Freedom, Safety, & Compassion to Move through Hard Things & Experience True Flourishing with Aundi Kolber Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if anxiety isn't your enemy? What if it's trying to help? We all feel anxious at times. As we close out this series on Inside Out, we're bring you some powerful tips about how to transform anxiety into a powerful ally. Here’s what we cover: 1. The most important strategy when you feel anxious (12:59) 2. How to recognize the voice of anxiety (14:03) 3. The relationship between anxiety & numbing (18:07) 4. Healthy “escape” vs. unhealthy numbing (21:22) 5. How to understand passages like “Do not be anxious” in the Bible (22:36) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 67: The Link Between Faith & Emotional Healing—Gen Z, College Life, & A Hidden Search for Meaning with Cindy Gao Episode 39: Boundaries for Your Soul—How to Navigate Your Overwhelming Thoughts & Feelings Episode 41: Boundaries With Fear And Anxiety—How to Calm the Chaos Within and the Joy of Internal Boundaries Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Become the best version of yourself and get 15% off Ned products with code BESTOFYOU. Go to helloned.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever get activated by your kids—even when they’re not really doing anything wrong? It happens to the best of parents! Today’s episode, featuring renowned Enneagram expert, Beth McCord, is such an incredibly helpful and practical conversation about how to transform triggers into opportunities for health and connection. Here’s what we cover: 1. How the Enneagram helped Beth stop comparing herself to other moms (7:46) 2. Why neither shaming yourself—or blaming others works (10:16) 3. A step by step process for what to do when you get activated by your kids (21:30) 4. How Beth's family’s love for debate triggered childhood wounds & how she worked through it (29:37) 5. How and when to talk about the Enneagram with your kids (39:00) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 52: The Enneagram—9 Ways to Uncover the Best (and Worst) of Who You Are, Get Honest With Yourself, & Improve Your Relationships Episode 109: Healing Burdens From the Past—How to Overcome Childhood Wounds and Heal Your Younger Self with Tammy Sollenberger Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Become the best version of yourself and get 15% off Ned products with code BESTOFYOU. Go to helloned.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all need to tune up our boundaries from time to time, especially when encountering difficult people. Today, I'm sharing an encore episode about the Biblical mandate to "Turn the Other Cheek." Spoiler alert: it has nothing to do with being a doormat in the face of toxicity! Originally titled, Should I Turn the Other Cheek? Why It's the Opposite of Being a Doormat & How to Stand Firm in the Face of Gaslighting, Manipulation, & Toxicity, today's episode shows you how to detect toxic strategies and navigate tricky relational situations with wisdom and clarity. Here's what we cover: 1. What the Bible has to say about toxic behavior (5:24) 2. Does it work to “love people into change”? (14:56) 3. Biblical examples of being a fool (33:14) 4. Biblical strategies for being wise like Jesus (36:52) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 2: What Should I Know About Gaslighting? Episode 24: Boundaries, the Spectrum of Toxicity, and a Note About Evil Episode 25: Types of No Part 1—How to Say “No” in Healthy Relationships Episode 26: Types of "No" Part 2—How to Say "No" to Toxicity, The Real Meaning of Turn the Other Cheek & How to Form a Boundaries Committee Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever struggle with negative beliefs about yourself, even though you know they aren't true? We all carry burdens that we pick up in childhood, and these burdens can be surprisingly persistent. Today's guest, therapist, author of The One Inside, & host of The One Inside IFS podcast, Tammy Sollenberger shares her journey of healing her younger self from these painful burdens. Here's what we cover: The surprising way we can connect with God's healing Why we pick up burdens in childhood How Tammy healed her burden of "I'm not wanted" The impact of childhood burdens on marriage and parenting The spiritual practices that have helped Tammy heal Find the transcript and resources from the episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 108: Inside Out—Internal Family Systems, Therapy, and High-Performing Protectors with Jenna Riemersma Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Sign up for AromaTru's Insider Club today and you'll receive a FREE Waterless Oil Diffuser and a FREE lemon eucalyptus oil - that's over $200 in savings. Head to aromatruorganics.com/bestofyou to take advantage of this exclusive offer. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten / Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever feel like you're wearing a mask, hiding how you really feel from others? Do you find yourself in conflict with different aspects of your personality, struggling to find harmony? In honor of the new Pixar movie, Inside Out 2, we're diving into Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy in a brand new series this week! Today's guest, Jenna Riemersma is an amazing human, an expert IFS clinician, and the bestselling author of 2 books on IFS. Here's what we cover: What is Internal Family Systems (IFS)? The hidden cost of high-performance armor Are kids truly resilient or just coping? 3 signs of a good therapist Jenna's journey of writing her book on IFS Innovative Practices for ongoing healing Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Connect with Jenna at: https://jennariemersma.com/ Get Jenna's free Insight Timer IFS meditations Read Altogether You and Altogether Us If you like this episode you'll love: Episode 39: Boundaries For Your Soul: How to Navigate Your Overwhelming Thoughts & Feelings Episode 40: 5 Steps to Healing Painful Emotions Episode 43: How to Tame Your Inner Critic & Why All Parts Are Welcome Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Become the best version of yourself and get 15% off Ned products with code BESTOFYOU. Go to helloned.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you or someone you love struggled with depression? If so, you’re not alone. Rates of depression have increased in the past few years, and my guest today is here to give us hopeful, helpful, science-backed wisdom on how to name, frame, and brave a path out of depression. From identifying the subtle signs of mild depression to addressing more severe and persistent symptoms, our conversation will equip you with practical tools and strategies to tackle depression. Whether you're personally struggling or supporting a loved one, this episode will help you find clarity and direction. My guest today, Dr. Len Lantz, is one of America's top psychiatrists and a clinical assistant professor in psychiatry at the University of Washington School of Medicine. He is the editor of www.psychiatryresource.com, and he maintains a clinical practice at Big Sky Psychiatry in Helena, Montana. **Content Warning: This episode briefly touches on the topic of suicide. We want you to feel safe and cared for while listening, so please take care, or if you need to skip this one, consider asking a friend to listen on your behalf.** Here’s what we cover: 1. Why mental health diagnoses are hard to get right (10:53) 2. Current statistics on increasing rates of depression (16:51) 3. Signs and symptoms of depression (18:21) 4. Debunking stigmas about depression in faith-based communities (22:53) 5. Research-backed interventions for mild depression (25:48) 6. Proven medical options for treating severe or stubborn depression (33:38) 7. How to support a loved one struggling with depression (38:56) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 106: Transform Limiting Beliefs, Embrace Critical Thinking, & Navigate Holistic Health with Dr. Josh Axe Episode 33: People Pleasing & Developing Your Own Inner Compass: Thoughts on Depression, Mental Health & the Church, and Finding Hope in Dark Places Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to https://hensonshaving.com and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Give all the fathers in your life a unique, heartfelt gift you’ll all cherish for years—StoryWorth! Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/bestofyou! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you wondered how a single negative comment can shape your beliefs about yourself? In this episode, we dive into the crucial distinction between critical thinking and limiting beliefs, exploring how they shape our decisions. My guest, Dr. Josh Axe, author of the New York Times bestselling book, Think This, Not That, shares his personal story of overcoming a powerful limiting belief and helping his mom navigate through cancer. He offers some powerful critiques of our current medical model, and some practical tips to navigate a more holistic way towards health. Do not miss this thought-provoking episode! Here’s what we cover: 1. The difference between critical thinking and limiting beliefs (2:52) 2. How one person’s negative comment created a limiting belief (9:11) 3. Josh's journey with his mom through cancer (13:51) 4. The negative effect of limiting beliefs (19:21) 5. An incisive critique of pharmaceutical ads in the U.S. (21:39) 6. How to balance natural & medical interventions (23:41) 7. The power of reverse-engineering your life based on your vision for the future (34:18) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 105: 4 Lies We Tell, the Mental Health Benefits of Honesty, & How to Stop Lying In Your Relationships Episode 10: What are Limiting Beliefs and How Do I Overcome Them with Mary Marantz Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to https://hensonshaving.com/bestofyou and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you ever tempted to lie to spare someone’s feelings or avoid conflict? You're not alone. Research shows that most people tell at least one lie every day, even though honesty significantly benefits our relationships and mental health. In today’s episode, we explore the science and Biblical wisdom behind lying, and I'll share practical strategies to foster more honesty (spoiler alert: it involves setting boundaries!) in your relationships. Here's what we cover: How often do we lie? 4 mental health benefits of honesty 4 types of lies we tell The link between lying and boundaries 3 reasons why we lie The most important question to ask yourself about the lies you tell Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 20: Making Peace with Yourself (& Facing Your Fear of Disappointing Other People) Episode 72: Overcoming Failure, Handling Adversity, and Telling Yourself the Truth Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to https://hensonshaving.com/bestofyou and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) Sign up for AromaTru's Insider Club today and you'll receive a FREE Waterless Oil Diffuser and a FREE lemon eucalyptus oil - that's over $200 in savings. Head to aromatruorganics.com/bestofyou to take advantage of this exclusive offer. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever felt isolated because you can't open up to others? Do you worry that showing vulnerability might lead to more hurt? You are in for such a special treat today. This is such an honest, incredibly real conversation about the risks of vulnerability, the hurts that come from letting others in AND the incredible opportunities for intimacy, connection, and healing when we do. My dear friends, Kathy Tuan-MacLean and Tara Edelschick, authors of the new Bible study experience, "Moms at the Well," surveyed over seven hundred moms and discovered most women struggle with worry, anger, comparison, escapism, a desire for control, and heartbreak. Yet most women feel alone in these struggles. If you've ever felt lonely or skeptical about finding community with other women, this episode is for you. Here's what we cover: * The dissonance we feel about vulnerability (2:21) * How 1 marriage crisis launched a 20 year small group (11:28) * 2 essential ingredients to safeguard trust (16:00) * How they dealt with gossip (21:50) * Strategies for dealing with hurt feelings, ruptures & repair (24:38) * One shocking result from their survey (34:43) * The strategy Alison used to find a friend when lonely (43:35) * The one thing that kills group trust (48:43) For 20% off + free shipping for Moms at the Well, use code IVPPOD20 here Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 85: The Goal of a Healthy Family & 6 Roles We Take On In Dysfunction Episode 66: The Truth About Anxiety & How to Become a Worry Free Parent with Sissy Goff Episode 65: Vulnerability, Parenting, and Letting Go of Control—Inside A Guy’s Perspective With Our Friends From Dadville Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We don't want to gossip, but most of us do it. What if gossip actually plays a deeper role in our lives and relationships? So often in life we bump into "grey areas," areas that can stir up dissonance inside of us. We hold certain beliefs or values, yet we find ourselves acting in ways that are contrary to those values. In this series, we're exploring some of these areas that can bring up dissonance inside. Our focus today is gossip. I explore the problems with gossip, as well as some of the surprising research on how it can be constructive. By examining both the positive and negative aspects of gossip, you'll feel empowered to name, frame, and brave a healthier understanding of gossip in your life and relationships. Why gossip is a gray area (3:09) What the Bible says about gossip (6:42) What psychology research says about gossip (12:46) 6 motivations behind gossip (13:43) Constructive vs. destructive forms of gossip (21:40) How to Name, Frame, and Brave gossip in your own life (29:17) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 102: I Shouldn’t Feel Conflicted About God—How to Name, Frame, and Brave Complicated Emotions About Faith & God Episode 96: Signs of Emotional Immaturity & How to Bring Emotional Health Into Your Relationships Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever feel distant from God? Do you struggle with conflicting emotions or unanswered questions that make it hard to feel God's presence in your life? Today's episode brings the 🔥🔥🔥. I'm passionate about naming the false guilt and counterfeit messages that keep us from a vibrant relationship with God. So often we try to shove complicated feelings aside or manipulate ourselves into feeling what we think we “should” feel in our faith. It doesn't work. The good news is that as with any relationship, when you name and frame what you're feeling honestly, you invest in a deeper, more authentic relationship with God. Here’s what we cover… 1. The problem with spiritual bypassing (7:36) 2. 6 counterfeit messages we internalize about God (19:34) 3. 5 framing questions to help you transform those messages (24:23) 4. Specific examples of braving steps you can take in your spiritual life (26:51) 5. My personal experience with spiritual dissonance (31:44) Today's episode is based on an excerpt from Chapter 11 of I Shouldn't Feel This Way, available everywhere books are sold. Find a list of resources from this episode here. Bonus Episode: Aundi Kolber & Dr. Alison on Writing & Launching Books Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Happy Book Launch day! Today I Shouldn't Feel This Way is out in the world AND it's the two-year anniversary of The Best of You Podcast . To celebrate, I asked my friend, fellow therapist, and author, Aundi Kolber, to join me for a special bonus episode! Join us as we share insights into why we started writing, what we keep private vs. what we share publicly, and how to navigate the publishing industry. Pick up your copy of I Shouldn't Feel This Way today! Get Aundi's Strong Like Water Guided Journey today! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you navigate anger in your family? What do you do when a parent who was supposed to love you and keep you safe actually caused you harm? Families evoke such complicated emotions. You might feel angry and then guilty about that anger. You might feel a mixture of love and resentment. Today, we tackle family anger and generational trauma. My guest, Lisa-Jo Baker was a teenager when her mother died, leaving her alone with her father and his fierce temper. When she found herself exhibiting that same temper with her own son, she knew it was time to dig deeper. Her new memoir, It Wasn't Roaring, It Was Weeping, is a beautifully written, incredibly powerful story of the legacy of anger, violence, and generational trauma—and how one family healed. You do not want to miss this conversation. Here’s what we cover: 1. When a parent is both hero & villain (9:13) 2. The moment Lisa-Jo realized her father’s anger had become hers (15:43) 3. How she began to investigate her past (19:05) 4. A powerful metaphor for the scars of our families (31:31) 5. The risk of discussing your pain with your parents (35:07) 6. Self-righteous anger vs. wise anger (36:30) 7. What Lisa-Jo confronted about racism as a South African and an American (39:14) 8. Biblical wisdom for healing (51:41) Order It Wasn't Roaring It Was Weeping here Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving Episode 99: I Shouldn’t Feel Like My Spirit is Broken—Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul with Christopher Cook Episode 100: I Shouldn’t Feel Betrayed By Someone I Trust—How to Grieve, Breathe, & Receive in the Wake of Broken Trust with Steve Carter Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever felt betrayed by someone you thought you could trust? It's a deeply painful experience that can leave you questioning not only the betrayer but also your own judgment. Trust, once broken, seems almost impossible to rebuild. My guest today, Steve Carter, experienced a series of profound betrayals at a pivotal moment in his life. In 2018, amidst misconduct allegations against Bill Hybels, founder of Willow Creek Community Church, Steve made the difficult decision to step down from his role as a newly minted lead pastor—a position he once considered his dream job. Shortly thereafter, he faced yet another personal betrayal by his own parents. Reeling from the loss of his job, his dream, and his trust in those closest to him, Steve entered a desert season guided by three words he sensed God gave to him: Grieve. Breathe. Receive. Steve's journey through loss is so powerful, so honest, and so deeply healing. Please do not miss this conversation! Here’s what we cover: 2 essential ingredients for trust (12:40) Why grief is the antidote to cynicism (22:28) Confronting our attraction to patterns of narcissism (28:08) The anger high vs. the peace of forgiveness (36:25) How he hangs on to his love for the church (34:03) Purchase Grieve, Breathe, Receive by Steve Carter here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving with J.S. Park Episode 99: I Shouldn’t Feel Like My Spirit is Broken—Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul with Christopher Cook Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever feel like your spirit is broken? Do you feel like you can't put yourself back together despite your best efforts? Please do not miss this episode. My guest, Christopher Cook, has such powerful words about a broken spirit and how it’s different from (but related to) depression and burnout. We also dig into a real time discussion of the dark night of the soul. This conversation connected so many dots for me, and I cannot wait for you to hear it. Here’s what we cover: 1. The painful circumstances that nearly broke Christopher's spirit (7:00) 2. Recovering from survival mode (12:59) 3. What is a broken spirit? (15:32) 4. Chris’s experience of a dark night of the soul (25:07) 5. The true meaning of surrender (30:46) 6. How to support someone going through a dark night of the soul (41:12) Check out Healing What You Can't Erase by Christopher Cook Find a list of resources from this episode here. Related Episodes: Episode 77: The Dark Night of the Soul—Why It Happens & What It Means Episode 71: All About Therapy—Do I Need a Therapist, How Do I Find One, and What Type of Therapy Works Best? Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when you're grieving? How do you support others through grief? Grief shows up in all of our lives—whether you’re grieving the loss of a person, a relationship, or a dream. We need each other to grieve well. It’s not something we were designed to do in isolation. My guest today, hospital chaplain, J.S. Park, is a powerful story teller and grief catcher. His viral posts about grief and death have revealed an incredibly important need. So many of us long to give voice to our grief in a culture that often rushes to push it aside. If you're feeling grief, or if you love someone who's grieving, please do not miss this episode. Here’s what we cover: 1. Why parts of us fear grief (5:20) 2. Why naming grief is so important (9:50) 3. How sitting with loss impacted Joon's faith (23:56) 4. The prayer Joon says before walking into a room (26:20) 5. The #1 thing you can do for someone after a loss (30:56) 6. How to set grief boundaries (36:40) 7. How to support someone who is grieving & what *not* to do (41:07) 8. The one word Joon wants for all of us (48:46) Order Joon's new book here. Find a list of resources from this episode here. Related Episode: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today’s episode is just so special and so deeply personal. If you’ve experienced trauma, please listen. If you love someone, please listen. Trauma touches so many lives, and it’s so often misunderstood. In today’s episode, Monique Koven, host of The Healing Trauma podcast, shares her powerful story of healing from trauma. There is absolute gold in this episode for everyone. Here’s what we cover: 1. The anxiety response she couldn't "logic" herself out of (8:50) 2. How misdiagnosis caused further harm (10:39) 3. The role of anger in her healing (21:21) 4. Exactly how she began to heal the anxiety response she experienced (32:03) 5. Separating God out from hurtful church messages (24:15) 6. How Ann Voskamp’s work showed her an example of glimmers (34:36) 7. Monique’s profound word for you if you’ve experienced trauma (38:13) Find a list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episodes: Episode 79: Surviving Trauma & A Path to Forgiveness—Finding God In the Hardest Parts of Your Story With Esau McCaulley Episode 15: C-PTSD—The Pain of A Million Paper Cuts Episode 4: What Do I Need To Know About Trauma? Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you walk on eggshells with someone you love? Do you sometimes feel like you can't have an honest conversation? Signs of emotional immaturity are everywhere. In today’s episode, we dive into the signs of emotional immaturity and its profound effect on our relationships. You'll learn the difference between emotionally mature and immature responses so that you can improve your connections. Here’s what we cover: 1. Why emotional immaturity is so prevalent & how it showed up in me! (6:15) 2. Examples of mature vs. immature emotional responses (10:43) 3. The difference between emotional immaturity and narcissism (21:44) 4. The role of enmeshment in emotional immaturity (29:41) 5. Tips for how to navigate a relationship with an emotionally immature person (35:33) 6. Tips for growing in emotional maturity (37:42) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episodes: Episode 1: What Is Narcissism Really? Episode 94: Should I Stay or Should I Walk Away? How to Discern When It’s Time to Leave with Emily P. Freeman Episode 95: 4 Toxic Behaviors You Need to Recognize & the #1 Way to Protect Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’re human, you’ve encountered some toxic behaviors. We all have. And it’s not wise to be naive about them. I’m passionate about helping you identify these toxic behaviors—not to label people, but to name behaviors accurately. When you understand the nature of toxic strategies, you can protect yourself and move toward health. Here’s what you’ll learn: 1. A mistake vs. a pattern of toxic behaviors (4:59) 2. The root of toxic behaviors (15:14) 3. Examples of healthy communication vs. manipulation (16:40) 4. Identifying guilt-driven love (22:03) 5. The difference between constructive feedback & criticism (25:48) 6. Examples of triangulation (31:32) 7. The #1 antidote against toxic behaviors (36:17) 8. Examples of word & action boundaries (39:04) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episodes: Episode 94: Should I Stay or Should I Walk Away? How to Discern When It’s Time to Leave with Emily P. Freeman Episode 1: What Is Narcissism Really? Episode 26: Types of "No" Part 2—How to Say "No" to Toxicity, The Real Meaning of Turn the Other Cheek & How to Form a Boundaries Committee Boundaries and the Bible Youtube Playlist Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Listen & subscribe to https://tinyurl.com/HeartOfDatingPodcast! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you decide when it’s time to leave a place or a relationship behind? We have to make decisions all the time. Yet most of us struggle with it. It’s hard to leave something (or someone) behind. It’s also hard to give ourselves the time that we need to wrestle with the decision. When you don’t have a process, you might be tempted to avoid decision-making. Or you might rush too quickly into a decision that isn’t quite right. That’s why I’m thrilled to have this conversation with Emily P. Freeman this week. It’s such a rich conversation about how to discern when it’s time to walk away and what to do when it's time to enter into a new space. Here’s what we cover: 1. The truth about tiny red flags (11:29) 2. 4 crucial questions to ask yourself (13:40) 3. What to do with those 51/49 decisions (20:13) 4. Readiness vs. timeliness in decision making (21:30) 5. Emily’s decision process for leaving a church (25:26) 6. How to walk into a new space (33:28) 7. A life-changing 2 word mantra for decision making (38:34) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episode: Episode 93: 3 Ways to Stop Guilt-Tripping Yourself, Untangle Complicated Emotions, & Discover the Joy of Clarity Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Emotions are complicated. They're also beautiful. When you don't honor the complicated mix of fears, frustrations, and also the good things that you feel, you doubt yourself and you doubt other people. You deprive yourself of the opportunity to get real wisdom and to brave healthier solutions. Today we're diving into these complicated feelings together. Here's what we cover: 1. Why emotional complexity is a gift 2. Examples of how we guilt-trip & gaslight ourselves 3. How to locate emotions within a larger story 4. Real-life examples 5. The 3 most important guideposts to get started Preorder I Shouldn't Feel This Way! Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Related Episode: Episode 92: How to Honor Loss & Why It Matters With Rachel Marie Kang Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Ritual’s Essential for Women 18+ is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Get 40% off your first month for a limited time at ritual.com/BESTOFYOU. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We experience big and little losses all the time. A friend moves away. An opportunity passes you by. A relationship ends. Learning how to recognize and honor the losses we all experience can become a beautiful part of life, leading to more kindness, self-compassion, and connection. But we don't often talk about our losses, let alone how to honor them. That's why I loved this conversation with Rachel Marie Kang about creating space to honor loss. She is the author of the brand new book, The Matter of Little Losses, a beautiful journey through how to honor the big and little losses in your life. Here's what we cover: 1. The difference between loss and grief (2:09) 2. Different types of loss (7:22) 3. How we process loss as children (14:23) 4. Examples of “little” losses (22:46) 5. The most important way to parent kids through losses (31:04) 6. Rachel’s 3 steps for tending losses each day (35:25) 7. The thing we want most to help us through loss (39:59) 8. Why honoring loss brings hope (47:25) Get The Matter of Little Losses here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episodes: Episode 90: Parenting Through Transitions—How Their Challenges Catalyze Your Growth Episode 91: Self-Worth–How to Believe You Are Enough & Transform Your Life with Jamie Kern Lima Episode 42: How to Honor Sadness, Set Boundaries with Loneliness, and What to Do When You Don’t Have Time for this Work Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you doubt yourself? Struggle to respect your own worth? Self-worth is foundational to both our psychological and our spiritual health, and today's episode is all about how to develop it. My guest, Jamie Kern Lima, is an entrepreneur, philanthropist, New York Times bestselling author, and founder of IT Cosmetics, a company she started in her living room and grew to the largest luxury makeup brand in the country. If you've ever struggled with self-doubt, this episode is for you. Here’s what we cover: 1. The 4 benefits of self-worth 2. The difference between self-worth and self-confidence 3. The moment Jamie realized she was believing a lie 4. Who are you really doubting? 5. The prayer Jamie prayed to combat God-doubt 6. Research on negative self-talk 7. How to reframe rejection Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episode: Episode 29: Perfectionism and Proving Your Worth: How to Stop Chasing Approval and Start Living the Life You Actually Want Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten. Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Navigating transitions with your children is a deep dive into raw emotions, facing conflict, and your own unhealed wounds. These transitions aren't easy. The stakes feel so high! But when you face them with courage, compassion and curiosity, you'll find your way through the wilderness and onto a beautiful path. As you do your own work, you'll be an even stronger anchor for your kids! Rowena Day is back to discuss: 1. How parenting changes our neural pathways (9:25) 2. Learning to set limits (12:17) 3. Parenting differently than how you were parented (22:10) 4. Growth vs. fixed mindset (29:29) 5. A better way to praise your kids (30:29) 6. The problem with peer attachments (36:40) 7. The ultimate goal of all this parenting work (45:47) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Related Episodes: Episode 69: Your Future Self—8 Challenges to Resolve As You Become the Person You Were Meant to Be Episode 88: Navigating Transitions—What to Do When Change Stirs up Anxiety, Uncertainty, or Confusion Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices