The Art of Manliness

It’s one thing to be bored by having to wait in line or sit through a dry lecture. It’s another thing to be bored with life itself.What can you do about this kind of existential boredom?My guest will share a remedy with us today on the show. His name is Kevin Hood Gary, and he’s a professor of education, specializing in the philosophy of education. We begin our conversation with the difference between situational and existential boredom, and how the latter arises when we toggle solely between work and amusement. Kevin argues that we need to add an element of leisure, as the ancients understood it, into our lives, and we talk about what that looks like, and how it requires embracing solitude, study, epiphanies, and love.Connect With Kevin Hood GaryKevin’s WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don’t forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Transcript Coming SoonSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you or someone you know has a problem with procrastination, you've probably chalked it up to a deficiency in time management skills or self-control. But my guest says there are deeper reasons underlying procrastination, and he'll unpack what they are today on the show.Joseph Ferrari is a Catholic deacon, a professor of psychology, and a foremost researcher and expert on procrastination who has authored or co-authored 400 professional articles and 35 books and textbooks. Today on the show, Dr. Ferrari explains the psychological dynamics behind procrastination and what you can do to counter them. He also shares the difference between regular and chronic procrastination, which of your parents you probably got your propensity to procrastinate from, and how procrastination can manifest in indecision.Resources Related to the Podcast Select books/textbooks Joseph has authored/co-authored on procrastination: Still Procrastinating: The No Regrets Guide to Getting It Done Procrastination and Task Avoidance: Theory, Research, and Treatment Counseling the Procrastinator in Academic Settings AoM Article:Stop Procrastinating Today With Behavioral Science AoM Podcast #444: How to Use the Procrastination Equation to Start Getting Things Done AoM Article: Get Better Without Torturing Yourself — The Power of Temptation Bundling Connect With Dr. Joseph FerrariJoseph's faculty pageSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Everyone has some bad habits, and they nearly always involve doing something too much. Eating too much, drinking too much, buying too much, looking at your phone too much. Why do we have such a propensity for overdoing it?My guest says it's all thanks to a "scarcity loop" that we're hardwired to follow. Once you understand how this loop works, you can start taking action to resist the compulsive cravings that sabotage your life.Michael Easter is the author of Scarcity Brain: Fix Your Craving Mindset and Rewire Your Habits to Thrive with Enough. Today on the show, Michael unpacks the three parts of the scarcity loop, and how they've been amplified in the modern day. We talk about the slot machine lab that corporations use to hack your brain, why your main problem may be that you're understimulated rather than overstimulated, why addiction may be better thought of as a symptom rather than a disease, how the quantification and gamification of life can negatively impact your experience of it, and how ultimately, the fix for resisting your bad habits is having something better to do than chase the cheap, unsatisfying hits of pleasure our culture so readily offers.Resources Related to the Podcast Michael's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #708 — Overcome the Comfort Crisis AoM Article: Via Negativa — Adding to Your Life By Subtracting Research of Thomas Zentall Research of C. Thi Nguyen Sally Satel Maia Szalavitz AoM Article: The Groundhog Day Diet — Why I Eat the Same Thing Every Day AoM Podcast #636: Why You Overeat and What to Do About It Sunday Firesides: Tidying Up Our Gilded Cages Connect With Michael Easter Michael’s website Michael on Instagram Michael on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to be happier is a topic covered in countless books, blogs, and podcasts. Consume enough of this content and you repeatedly come across the same recommendations that have purportedly been proven to increase happiness: exercise, spend time in nature, meditate, socialize, and practice gratitude. But is there actual scientific evidence that these strategies work?Today on the show, we'll find out what professor of social psychology Elizabeth Dunn discovered when she did a study of happiness studies, and what the surprising findings have to do with the "replication crisis" that's occurred in science. In the second half of our conversation, Elizabeth shares the takeaways of a few well-vetted happiness studies she's done herself, including how to spend your money and use technology to increase happiness. And we discuss how to apply these findings, and the findings of all happiness studies, in a wise way that takes into account your unique personality and peculiarities. After the show is over, check out the show notes at aom.is/happinessstudiesResources Related Study by Elizabeth Dunn and Dunigan Folk: "A systematic review of the strength of evidence for the most commonly recommended happiness strategies in mainstream media" Happy Money by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton AoM Article: How to Choose What Advice to Take Connect With Elizabeth Dunn Elizabeth's website Elizabeth on X See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

According to some estimates, only 5% of people in the West get the recommended amount of daily physical activity. Is the solution getting a fitness tracker, developing more discipline, or buying a piece of cardio equipment for your basement?My guest would say none of the above, and would have you think about kids playing at recess instead.Darryl Edwards is the founder of the Primal Play Method. Today on the show, we discuss the epidemic of sedentariness which besets both adults and children and why technology and willpower isn’t the cure for it. Darryl then explains why a better solution to getting more movement and physical activity in our lives is rediscovering the intrinsically motivating pleasure of play. He offers suggestions on how to do that, including compiling a play history for your life, embracing “primal movements” that will get you moving like an animal and a child, and getting over the fear of looking goofy while doing so. We discuss the joys and health benefits of exploring your capabilities and environment and how to incorporate more movement into your busy adult life by making even regular activities more playful.Resources Related to the Podcast Darryl’s books: Animal Moves: How to Move Like an Animal to Get You Leaner, Fitter, Stronger and Healthier for Life My First Animal Moves: A Children’s Book to Encourage Kids and Their Parents to Move More, Sit Less and Decrease Screen Time AoM Article: Get Fit Like a Wild Man — A Primer on MovNat AoM Article: The 10 Physical Skills Every Man Should Master AoM Article: The Importance of Having a Physical Identity AoM Article: 30 Days to a Better Man Day 24 — Play! AoM Podcast #508: Break Out of Your Cage and Stop Being a Human Zoo Animal AoM Podcast #245: The Workout the World Forgot AoM Podcast #749: Let the Children Play! Connect With Darryl Edwards Primal Play website Darryl on FB Darryl on IG See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ever wondered why, after hours of reading and highlighting, you still feel unprepared for that big test? Or why, shortly after a work training, you can’t remember much of what was said and how to apply it? Or why you have trouble comprehending a difficult book?Whether you’re a student studying for exams, an employee trying to learn the ropes at a new job, or someone who’s into personal study, learning effectively is hugely important in increasing your capacity and knowledge. Unfortunately, most of what people do to learn simply doesn’t work.Here to unlock the superior, research-backed strategies that will help you harness the potential of your brain is Daniel Willingham, a professor of psychology and the author of Outsmart Your Brain. Today on the show, Daniel explains why the default way that our brains want to learn doesn’t work, and how to approach learning by both reading and listening more effectively. We discuss how to get more out of your reading, including whether you should highlight, whether speed reading is effective, the optimal method for taking notes during a lecture, the best way to cement things into memory, and much more.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Article: How and Why to Become a Lifelong Learner AoM Article: How to Read a Book AoM Article: How to Read Long and Difficult Books AoM Podcast #677: The Value of Learning New Skills in Adulthood AoM Article: Ace Your Exams — Study Tactics of the Successful Gentleman Scholar AoM Article: Write This Down: Note-Taking Strategies for Academic Success Connect With Daniel Willingham Daniel’s website Daniel on X Daniel on TikTok See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In the Apostle Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians, he wrote, “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”What does putting away the ways of childhood and stepping into manhood look like?My guest says it requires making five key shifts in mindset and perspective. His name is Jon Tyson, and he’s a pastor and the creator of the Primal Path, a rite of passage geared toward helping boys become men. Today on the show, Jon and I unpack the five shifts of manhood and how parents and mentors can help young men make them and move from immaturity to maturity.Resources Related to the Podcast Jon’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #810 — How to Turn a Boy Into a Man The Intentional Father: A Practical Guide to Raise Sons of Courage and Character by Jon Tyson AoM Article: What Is Manliness? Adam’s Return: The Five Promises of Male Spirituality by Richard Rohr AoM Podcast #708: Overcome the Comfort Crisis Radical Candor by Kim Scott “The Courage to Face Ingratitude” by William George Jordan “This Is Water” by David Foster Wallace The 33 Marks of Maturity Connect With Jon Tyson Primal Path Forming Men Jon on IG See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

While there may be some heated rivalries in today's NBA, the ferocity of competition doesn't compare to the hard-hitting contests that took place during the 1987-1988 season, when four rising and falling dynasties — the Celtics, Lakers, Pistons, and Bulls — battled it out for supremacy.Here to illuminate that epic era in basketball and share what can be learned from it is Rich Cohen, author of When the Game Was War: The NBA's Greatest Season. Today on the show, Rich makes a case for why there's never be a season before or since like the one that played out in '87 and '88, and he profiles the players — Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, Isiah Thomas, and Michael Jordan — who dominated that season and changed the game. Along the way, we talk about the life lessons that can be taken from these players and their teams, including the rules legendary coach Phil Jackson gave the Bulls, which were inspired by the jazz musician Thelonious Monk.Resources Related to the Podcast Rich's last appearance on the AoM podcast:Episode #817 — Life Lessons From the World’s Greatest Negotiator The Last Dance on Netflix Winning Time on HBO AoM Article: Competition — The Fuel for Greatness Sunday Firesides: Your Worst Competitor Is You AoM Podcast #790: Kierkegaard on the Present (Passionless) Age "The Moods of Ernest Hemingway" by Lillian Ross Connect With Rich Cohen Rich's website Rich on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Change is a constant. Changes big and small are always happening in our lives, while the world also changes around us. We can either resist these changes as unmooring threats to our sense of self, or embrace them as chances to get better and stronger.The key to taking that second approach, my guest says, is developing rugged flexibility. His name is Brad Stulberg, and he's the author of Master of Change: How to Excel When Everything Is Changing – Including You. Today on the show, Brad unpacks why allostasis is a better model for dealing with disruption than homeostasis, and how healthy change moves in a cycle of order, disorder, and reorder. We then discuss ways to move through this cycle with rugged flexibility — an approach to life that keeps some things solid and stable, while letting others change and flow. We talk about the importance of adopting a being versus having orientation, managing your expectations, diversifying your identity, and more.Resources Related to the Podcast Brad's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: #491: Everything You Know About Passion is Wrong "The Case for a Tragic Optimism" by Viktor Frankl New Dad Survival Guide: The Mindset AoM Podcast #527: Male Spirituality and the Journey to the Second Half of Life With Richard Rohr AoM Article: How Labeling Your Emotions Can Help You Take Control AoM Podcast #690: The Life Philosophy of Bruce Lee Sunday Firesides: Build Your Life Upon Multiple Pillars of Support Sunday Firesides: Feelings Follow Action Connect With Brad Stulberg Brad's website Brad on IG See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Note: This is a rebroadcast. Do you ever get to feeling kind of down, dejected, and anxious come Sunday evening? People refer to this phenomenon as the “Sunday Night Blues,” and it’s a common experience. You may have chalked it up to rueing the fact that your fun and restful weekend is over, and that you have yet another workweek ahead.But my guest would say that your Sunday night sadness may also be rooted in the feeling of regret — the regret that you didn’t put your weekend to good use, that it wasn’t restful and fun, and that it was instead busy, draining, and, once again, a big letdown. Her name is Katrina Onstad, and she’s the author of The Weekend Effect. Today Katrina shares how the idea of the weekend, of having two back-to-back days off from work, came about, and how it’s been challenged and subsequently eroded in the modern day. We then talk about how to take back your weekends, so that your invaluable Saturdays and Sundays feel more the way they did when you were a kid — filled with a sense of possibility.Resources Related to the Podcast Saint Monday Haymarket square affair AoM Podcast #602: The Case for Being Unproductive AoM Podcast #450: How to Make Time for What Really Matters AoM Podcast #748: Time Management for Mortals AoM Podcast #743: How to Get Time, Priorities, and Energy Working in Your Favor AoM Article: How to Better Manage Your Life Admin AoM Article: The Rise of Spectatoritis AoM Article: The Lost Art of Cheap Recreation Connect With Katrina OnstadKatrina’s WebsiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When an organization wants to get more productive and better reach its goals, it typically looks to retool its leadership, trying to find lone figures who can apply more effective top-down control. But my guest says there’s a much more effective strategy for getting things done: creating and empowering teams of self-starters.Kyle Buckett is a retired Navy SEAL, an executive consultant, and the co-author ofLeadership Is Overrated: How the Navy SEALs (and Successful Businesses) Create Self-Leading Teams That Win. Today on the show, Kyle first unpacks the problems with the conventional model of leadership. He then explains what the self-led team-oriented model looks like and some of the ways to create effective self-led teams, including “killing the leader” and establishing a ritual-laden culture. We also talk about the role a leader can still play in an organization. Along the way, Kyle shares stories both from history and his experience as a SEAL that illustrate why self-led teams are so effective at getting things done.Resources Related to the Podcast Belgian Antarctic Expedition AoM Article: What the Race to the South Pole Can Teach You About How to Achieve Your Goals AoM Podcast #695: Sisu, the Finnish Art of Strength AoM Article: Got Sisu? Essential Guerrilla Tactics from the Finnish Winter War Connect With Kyle BuckettCulture Force/Leadership Is Overrated WebsiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ernest Hemingway's classic novel, For Whom the Bell Tolls, is often designated as one of the greatest books about war ever written and has appeared on the Marine Corps recommended reading list. Today on the show, I unpack For Whom the Bell Tolls with Hemingway scholar Mark Cirino. We discuss the background of the novel, its themes, and the literary techniques Hemingway employed in writing it. We end our conversation with our picks for the "one true sentence" in the book.Resources Related to the Podcast Mark's last appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #786 — The Writing Life of Ernest Hemingway AoM Podcast #219: The Real Life Story of Hemingway and The Sun Also Rises Ernest Hemingway: Thought in Action by Mark Cirino One True Sentence: Writers & Readers on Hemingway’s Art edited by Michael Von Cannon and Mark Cirino AoM Podcast #871: Jane Austen for Dudes Mark Salter's appearance on the One True Podcast “Big Two-Hearted River” by Ernest Hemingway Connect With Mark Cirino One True Podcast One True Podcast on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, there are certain principles like timing, leverage, and positioning that practitioners must master to successfully overcome an opponent. My guest has found that these same principles that allow someone to be successful on the mat, also apply to being successful outside of it.Rener Gracie is the co-owner and head instructor of Gracie University and the author of The 32 Principles: Harnessing the Power of Jiu-Jitsu to Succeed in Business, Relationships, and Life. Today on the show, Rener shares how he’s used some of the core teachings of jiu-jitsu, like the Pyramid Principle and the River Principle, in his business, and how you can use them to grapple with all kinds of obstacles in life.Resources Related to the Podcast Art of Manliness + Gracie Intro to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Videos: Part 1 — The History Part 2 — The Basics I Part 3 — The Basics II Part 4 — The Philosophy Rener‘s last appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #446: How Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Will Make You a Better Man Gracie University’s 32 Principles of Jiu-Jitsu Video Course Sunday Firesides: Secure Your Base AoM Article: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Connect With Rener Gracie The 32 Principles book website Rener on IG Rener on X See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Over the last decade, cannabis use has been legalized in more states. At the same time, the idea that marijuana is a safe drug has steadily increased.But is this an accurate perception?Recent research by my guest, Dr. Ryan Sultan, a professor of clinical psychiatry at Columbia University, casts some doubt on a universally affirmative answer to that question, and he says we need to be having a more objective, balanced, and nuanced conversation around cannabis than we currently are. We have exactly that kind of conversation today on the show. We dig into the fact that young adulta are the group most vulnerable to the potentially negative effects of cannabis and how marijuana use in adolescence is linked to both mental illness and cognitive deficits. Dr. Sultan unpacks how cannabis impacts the developing brain and may lead to schizophrenia, especially in males. We also talk about whether if you used marijuana as a young adult and then stopped, your brain can still recover, and a cannabis-related health concern for all ages that doesn’t concern the brain. We end our show with Dr. Sultan’s take on what the safe use of cannabis looks like for adults.Resources Related to the Podcast Dr. Sultan’s study: “Nondisordered Cannabis Use Among US Adolescents” Recent study on the association between cannabis use and schizophrenia Connect With Dr. Ryan Sultan The Sultan Lab at Columbia University Dr. Sultan's practice: Integrative Psych See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you want insight on how to make love last, you might ask friends, family, a therapist, or a pastor for advice. You probably wouldn't think to turn to a divorce lawyer. But my guest, James Sexton, who does that very job in New York City, says there may be few people who have a better perspective on how to hold a marriage together, than the guy who's got a front row seat to how they fall apart.James is the author of If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer's Guide to Staying Together, and today on the show he shares what he's learned from overseeing over a thousand divorces that you can use to reverse engineer a relationship that lasts. We discuss the five types of infidelity James sees in his practice and the approach to marriage that will prevent affairs. We then get into common sources of conflict in a marriage, including sex, finances, and kids, and how to address these issues so you never end up in James', or any other divorce lawyer's, office.Resources Related to the Podcast AoMPodcast #550: How to Strengthen Your Marriage Against Divorce AoM Article: Why the Secret of a Happy, Successful Marriage Is Treating It Like a Bank Account AoM Podcast #850: The Infidelity Formula AoM Article: A Resolution for Romance — The 52 Love Notes Challenge AoM Article: How and Why to Hold a Weekly Marriage Meeting C.S. Lewis quote on the "dance" in relationships from That Hideous Strength Connect With James Sexton James on IG James' firm See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There are tons of podcasts, blog posts, and books about how to get more focused. Focus is seen as the key to greater productivity and success.While focus is important, my guest says there are also amazing powers to be found in something that gets a lot less attention: the unfocused mind.Dr. Srini Pillay is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist, a brain-imaging researcher, and the author of Tinker Dabble Doodle Try: Unlock the Power of the Unfocused Mind. Today on the show, Srini explains the downsides of excessive focus, the importance of tapping into the unfocused mind, especially in the age of A.I., and the benefits of doing so, including how mind wandering can help you be more productive and creative, allow you to see greater possibilities for your life, and offer important insights that will get you unstuck from problems. He shares strategies to incorporate unfocused time into your lifestyle, including how to make daydreaming more beneficial and why you should let yourself doodle without guilt. Srini also makes a case for multitasking in the sense of switching back and forth between different tasks.Connect With Srini Pillay Srini's website Neuro Business Group website Srini on LinkedIn Srini on X Srini on IG Srini's articles on Harvard Health See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Note: This is a rebroadcast.In the quiet moments of our lives, we can all sense that our hearts long for something, though we often don't know what that something is. We seek an answer in our phones, and while they can provide some sense of extension and fulfillment — a feeling of magic — the use of technology also comes with significant costs in individual development and interpersonal connection that we typically don't fully understand and consider.My guest today will unpack what it is we really yearn for, how technology, when misused, can direct us away from the path to fulfilling those yearnings, and how we can find true human flourishing in a world in which so much works against it. His name is Andy Crouch and he's the author of The Life We're Looking For: Reclaiming Relationship in a Technological World. Today on the show we talk about the tradeoffs you make when you seek magic without mastery, and how we can understand our desires better once we understand ourselves as heart, soul, mind, and strength complexes who want to be loved and known. We discuss the difference between interactions that are personal versus personalized, as well as the difference between devices and instruments, and how to use your phone as the latter instead of the former. We end our conversation with why Andy thinks we need to redesign the architecture of our relational lives and create something he calls "households."Resources Related to the Podcast Faust by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Wendell Berry AoM article on Plato's idea of the tripartite nature of the soul AoM Podcast #723: Men Without Chests AoM Article: The Tool Works on Both Ends AoM Article: Communities vs. Networks — To Which Do You Belong? Connect With Andy Crouch Andy's Website Praxis Labs See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Note: This is a rebroadcast.When most people think about losing weight, they think about the details of a diet plan — what food to eat, how much of it to eat, and when to eat it. What they don't spend enough time working on, are the mental and emotional habits that can sabotage their efforts, regardless of the diet plan they adopt.That's why my guest today, despite being a biochemist, has made mindset the foundation of his approach to losing weight. His name is Dr. Trevor Kashey and he's the founder of Trevor Kashey Nutrition (TKN). We begin our conversation with a thumbnail of Trevor's unique background, which includes earning his first university degree in biochemistry at the age of 17, setting national records in powerlifting, and coaching an Olympic fight team, as well as how he went from coaching elite athletes to helping average folks lose weight. We then talk about why Trevor focuses on bridging the gap between knowledge and action, and the erroneous assumptions people make that keep them from following through on their intentions. From there we turn to the phases TKN takes its clients through, which begins with getting what Trevor calls "food clarity." We discuss how simply tracking what you eat can get you to naturally change your diet because of something called "the Hawthorne effect," and can almost be all you need to do to start losing weight. We then get into how to deal with your hunger when you're cutting calories, and why it's crucial to be decisive about it. We also discuss how you can eventually eat more once you work on eating less, how to manage the expectation of consistent weight loss, and why you really need to weigh yourself every week.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Podcast #708: Overcoming the Comfort Crisis AoM Podcast #715: What's the Most Sustainable Diet? AoM Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off Forever AoM article on how to track your food intake AoM Article: 6 Ways to Measure Your Body Fat The Hawthorne effect AoM series on willpower Connect With Dr. Trevor Kashey Trevor Kashey Nutrition: TKN Trevor on Instagram The Best Nutrition Group EVER on FB See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Personality tests sometimes come in for criticism these days for not being very accurate or helpful or for putting people into boxes. And it’s true that no test can ever entirely peg the complexities of personality, and they shouldn’t be applied with too much rigidity. But what these tests are useful for is serving as a prompt for reflecting on the particular ways you think, feel, and act, and, perhaps even more importantly, getting you to think about the fact that other people can see and approach the world in ways that are fundamentally different from your own.I haven’t found a personality test that better serves as this kind of tool than what’s called the “People Code” or the “Color Code,” which categorizes people into four colors: Reds, Blues, Whites, and Yellows. I’ve found it uncanningly insightful in helping me understand myself and others better, and it’s become a regular topic of conversation amongst my family and friends.Today I talk to the creator of the Color Code Personality Profile, psychologist Dr. Taylor Hartman. We discuss the strengths and weaknesses of the four color types, how to interact with each color to bring out their best traits, and how the colors combine in relationships. We then discuss the importance of developing the strengths of other colors besides your own, a process Taylor calls becoming “charactered.”Learn More/Connect With Taylor Hartman Taylor’s Website Take the ColorCode AssessmentDiscount code for the assessment: AOM30 The People Code The Character Code Taylor on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We often suppose that wars are fought over things like resources, border disputes, and ideologies. My guest calls this "the spreadsheet approach to war" and argues that, in reality, such factors only come in as justifications for the much deeper drives at play.Mike Martin is a Senior Visiting Fellow in the Department of War Studies, King's College London and the author of Why We Fight. Today on the show, he draws on his background in biology and experience serving in the British army to offer an explanation as to why individuals and nation-states go to war. Mike argues that there are two fundamental impulses behind the drive to war: the drive for status and the drive for belonging. We discuss these motivations and how leaders and ideologies corral and amplify them. We end our conversation with how this view of war could prevent conflicts and allow them to be fought more successfully, and also be a lens for how to help men flourish in a healthy way.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM series on status AoM series on honor AoM Podcast #756: How the Desire for Status Explains (Pretty Much) Everything AoM Podcast #908: Would You Have Been a Patriot or a Loyalist? AoM Podcast #419: American Honor — Creating the Nation’s Ideals During the Revolution Mike's latest book: How to Fight a War Connect With Mike MartinMike on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When someone asks us to do something we don’t want to do, we often say yes even though we want to say no, because we think that saying no will feel terrible. But my guest, Dr. Vanessa Patrick, says the opposite is true: we actually feel great when we say no.So why do we have such a hard time doing so?Today on the show, Vanessa, who’s the author of The Power of Saying No: The New Science of How to Say No that Puts You in Charge of Your Life, answers that question and more. She shares how to categorize the asks you get into quadrants to determine whether you should say yes or no to them. And she explains how to give an “empowered refusal” — a no that’s phrased in a way that makes it less likely to create offense or pushback — so you can start saying no to the things that don’t matter, and spend more of your time on the things that do.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Article: How to Firmly Say No Without Coming Off Like a Jerk AoM Article: A Better Way to Say No Sunday Firesides: Give the Gift of No AoM Article: Quit Being a Pushover: How to Be Assertive AoM Article: There Is No Indispensable Man Connect With Dr. Vanessa Patrick Vanessa’s website Vanessa on LinkedIn Vanessa on Twitter Vanessa on IG Vanessa’s faculty page See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

As you move through time, you exist as a present self who makes decisions, an in-between self who should carry out those decisions, and a future self who will benefit from those decisions. Yet as we all know, in-between self often fails to follow through on what present self resolves, leaving future self pretty bummed out.The solution to this dilemma, my guest says, is for your present self to become much better friends with your future self.His name is Hal Hershfield, and he's a professor of marketing, behavioral decision making, and psychology, and the author of Your Future Self: How to Make Tomorrow Better Today. Hal and I spend the first part of our conversation taking a really interesting philosophical dive into what the self even is. We talk about why our future self can feel like a stranger, why it's hard to know what he'll be like, and what this dilemma has to do with becoming a vampire. We then discuss how building a stronger connection with your future self makes your present self more willing to help him, and how you can become closer to your future self by engaging in mental time traveling. Hal shares a couple techniques that can facilitate this mental time travel, three mistakes people make in taking this cognitive trip, and how to start making tomorrow better today.Resources Related to the Podcast "The Self Is Moral" by Nina Strohminger Transformative Experience by L. A. Paul Yuta Chishima and Anne Wilson on writing a letter to and from your future self The End-of-History Illusion stickK.com AoM Podcast #731: A Futurist’s Guide to Building the Life You Want Connect With Hal HershfieldHal's WebsiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

While studying history back in the 1990s, Neil Howe and the late William Strauss noticed something: there seemed to be a pattern to history that repeated itself again and again. Howe and Strauss developed a theory that history moves in 80-100-year cycles divided into four 20-25-year "turnings": the High, Awakening, Unraveling, and Crisis.Neil Howe argues that we are currently living through a Fourth Turning, and today on the show, we unpack what that means. Neil is a historian, demographer, and economist, and his latest book is The Fourth Turning Is Here. The crisis of the Fourth Turning isn't a historical event — it's a generation-long era that sometimes seems to be getting better, sometimes seems to be getting worse, and moves through several phases before reaching a climax and resolution. Neil explains what these phases look like, which ones we've already been through and which are still to come, and when he thinks our Fourth Turning will end and the cycle of history will start over. In the second part of our conversation, Neil talks about what cultural changes he thinks we'll experience as the Fourth Turning progresses, including how he thinks gender roles will shift. We also discuss what happens if the crisis ends in disaster, and the most important thing to do to successfully navigate a Fourth Turning.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM article: The Generations of Men — How the Cycles of History Shape Your Values and Your Future Neil's last appearance on the show: Episode #256 Connect With Neil Howe Neil on Twitter Neil on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Lately, I've been talking to my son Gus about considering a career in the trades. A lot of the white collar jobs out there don't seem very fulfilling, and A.I. is going to make more and more of them disappear. But skilled tradesmen are in demand, and that demand is only going to grow. One option I've floated to Gus is to still go to an affordable college, for the mind expansion and social opportunities, but then, instead of going on to get a graduate degree, as so many young people do, he could go to trade school instead.That's one potential route should he be interested, but I sure wish he could be exposed to the trades while he's still in secondary education. All states have forms of what's called "Career and Technical Education," or CTE, but in most places, it's set up in a patchwork fashion; the programs are run by local schools that partner with other institutions that offer instruction in the trades.The state of Connecticut does things differently. They have a one-of-a-kind CTE system, which, as one journalist recently put it, could serve as a national model for how to put the trades back in school. The Connecticut Technical Education and Career System, or CTECS, includes 17 high schools that are all headed by a single agency. Each school offers an education in both academics and the trades on the same campus. The students who choose to attend these special high schools spend half of their time on the former and half of their time on the latter, so by the time they graduate, they've earned both a high school diploma and certification in a trade. And the size and organization of CTECS allows it to partner with hundreds of employers in the area who furnish students with paid work on actual projects, so they can get plenty of hands-on, real world experience.Today on the show, I talk to Brent McCartney, who oversees the architecture and construction trades at CTECS, about how the program works and how it benefits both the students and the community.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM series on working in the trades AoM Podcast #642: Finding Money and Meaning in the Blue Collar Trades AoM Podcast #308: The Case for Blue Collar Work With Mike Rowe Recent New Yorker article that featured CTECS: "The Great Electrician Shortage" Connect With Brent McCartney/Learn More About CTECS Connecticut Technical Education and Career System Brent on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you’re an athlete, you know that it can be helpful to get psyched up before a big game. But getting in the right mindset is important in any kind of high-stakes scenario, whether you want to perform your best in a big meeting, presentation, interview, audition, or conversation.My guest has some tips he gleaned from interviewing athletes, soldiers, entertainers, and executives on how to find that mindset. His name is Daniel McGinn, and he’s the author of Psyched Up: How the Science of Mental Preparation Can Help You Succeed. The first step to getting into an optimal mindset is managing negative emotions, so we begin our conversation with what works in mitigating stress and anxiety. From there we talk about how to get others psyched up with an effective pep talk and why the leaders who came out of WWII used the classic rah-rah style more than leaders do today. We then discuss the role of music in getting yourself psyched up and what Daniel learned from the DJ for the Red Sox about crafting the perfect pump-up playlist. Daniel shares how visualization and having a personal highlight reel can put you in a positive headspace, and whether or not anger, competition, and trash talk improve performance.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Podcast #569: How to Perform Your Best Under Pressure AoM Podcast #757: How to Achieve Cognitive Dominance With Mark McLaughlin AoM Article: Competition — The Fuel for Greatness Connect With Daniel McGinn Daniel on LinkedIn Daniel on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The last time we had entrepreneur, professor, and author Luke Burgis on the show, he discussed the concept of mimetic desire, which says that we want the things we want because other people want them. Since that time, Luke has continued to explore the idea of mimesis, and how to resist its negative consequences, in his Substack: Anti-Mimetic. Today on the show, Luke and I dig into these ideas and discuss ways we can step outside the tempo, cadences, and priorities that the world would foist upon us and establish our own rhythms for our lives. Luke unpacks what it means to have “thick desires” and become a “political atheist” and how these concepts can help you live a more anti-mimetic life.Resources Related to the Podcast Wanting: The Power of Mimetic Desire in Everyday Life by Luke Burgis Luke’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #714 — Why Do We Want What We Want? Leisure: The Basis of Culture by Josef Pieper Deceit, Desire, and the Novel by René Girard The Red and the Black by Stendhal AoM Article: What Do You Want to Want? AoM Article: Freedom From…Freedom To AoM Podcast #215: Becoming an Individual in an Age of Distraction With Matthew Crawford AoM Podcast #796: The Life We’re Looking For AoM Podcast #847: Overdoing Democracy Sunday Firesides: Not Everything Is Political Connect With Luke Burgis Luke’s Website Luke’s Substack: Anti-Mimetic See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Throughout each day, all of us make little shifts in our roles and responsibilities; we take off one hat and put on another. Sometimes these shifts are physical, as when we commute from home to the office. Other times, the shifts are mental, as when we finish working on an administrative task and start working on a creative one.My guest calls these little shifts “microtransitions” and says that mastering them is a significant key in living a happy, fulfilled, and successful life. His name is Dr. Adam Fraser and he’s a peak performance researcher and the author of The Third Space. As Adam explains, in each microtransition, there are three spaces: the first space which is the task, role, or place you’re leaving behind, the second space, which is the task, role, or place you’re transitioning to, and the third space which is the in-between transition itself. To make an ideal microtransition, you break that third space into three phases, and Adam walks us through how to execute each one so you can show up as your best self in the second space. We talk about how to make microtransitions between different work roles, and spend a lot of our conversation on how to improve the microtransiton between work and home — even if you work from home — so you can arrive ready to engage with your partner or family.Resources Related to the Podcast Sunday Firesides: Your Routine Needs Rites of Passage AoM article on how to use a “Homeric bath” as a transitional “homecoming” ritual AoM article on how Alexander Graham Bell used “locational prompts” to be more productive AoM article on doing different kinds of work in different places Sunday Firesides: Give Them the Cream Connect With Adam FraserAdam’s WebsiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When Americans think back to the War of Independence, most are apt to feel that, had they lived back then, they would have been Patriots for sure. In retrospect, the decision to rebel and get out from under the thumb of British rule seems inevitable. Yet only around a third of colonists ever declared themselves as revolutionaries, and even among the country's Founding Fathers, it wasn't always obvious if they would stay loyal to Great Britain or become rebels, right up until the signing of the Declaration of Independence.As H.W. Brands, historian, professor, and author of Our First Civil War explains, the decision to align with the side of the Loyalists or the Patriots was complex, and not only had to do with the kind of policy issues we often think about in regards to the war, but also personal factors related to respect and ambition. He talks about how George Washington and Benjamin Franklin were actually very unlikely Patriots and what ultimately got them to embrace the revolutionary cause, and why Franklin's son chose differently and remained a Loyalist. We also discuss why John Adams threw in his lot with the Patriots, and why Benedict Arnold flipped sides.Connect With H.W. Brands H.W.'s Substack: A User's Guide to History H.W. on Twitter H.W.'s faculty page See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When you’re walking in the woods, you’re often surrounded by trees. But you probably don’t notice them much, and when you do spot some irregularity, like a strange bulge in the trunk of a tree, you likely don’t have any idea how it got there. But my guest says that these trees you’re passing by have all kinds of stories to share, and once you learn their language, they can tell you all sorts of secrets about the world, and even help you navigate it.Tristan Gooley is an adventurer, expedition leader, natural navigator, and author of How to Read a Tree. Today on the show, he unpacks the clues in a tree’s shape, branches, bark, roots, and leaves, what they can tell you about the environment, and how they can help you find your way. We also talk about what looking at a tree stump can reveal, the hidden seasons in trees, and the first place to look in a tree to spy fall foliage. We end our conversation with how to get started with reading trees today.Resources Related to the PodcastTristan’s previous appearances on the AoM podcast: Episode #343: How to Read Nature — Awakening Your Senses to the Outdoors Episode #563: How to Develop Your Nature Instinct Connect With Tristan GooleyTristan’s Website: The Natural NavigatorSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My flight was awful. The restaurant's service was terrible. The traffic was horrible. My boss is the worst. Our culture is the stupidest.Whenever we get together with other people, we hear lots of complaints, and plenty come out of our own mouths.All this complaining may be ubiquitous, but it's not entirely innocuous. Complaining puts us in a negative mood, hurts our health, and damages our relationships.If you've ever wanted to complain less, my guest today has some advice on how to break the complaining habit and embrace a more positive and proactive life. His name is Will Bowen, and he's the founder of the Complaint Free movement and the author of A Complaint Free World. Today on the show, Will first defines what constitutes a complaint. He then shares the five main reasons people offer complaints, so you can learn to recognize what triggers yours. Will also explains how to deal with being on the receiving end of each type of complaint, so you don't have to listen to the complaining of others.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Article: Never Complain; Never Explain AoM Article: Why Negativity Is a Social Killer Dr. Robin Kowalski's research A New Earth: Awakening Your Life's Purpose by Eckhart Tolle Connect With Anthony Arvanitakis A Complaint Free World Website Will's Website See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Working out at any time of day is great. But my guest says there are distinct benefits to doing it in the a.m., and he's going to walk you through everything you need to know, from mindset to habits, to become a morning workout person.Anthony Arvanitakis is a bodyweight training coach and the author of The 7 A.M. Workout Edge: Wake Up, Work Out, Own the Day. Today on the show, he offers concrete tips for overcoming the challenges of working out in the morning, from getting out of bed to finding the time to do it before work, including his "Brain Start-Up Routine" for shaking off the just-woken-up inertia to get going. In the latter part of the show, Anthony details how to do a highly effective at-home bodyweight workout that can easily fit into your morning routine and requires minimal equipment and only 30 minutes. We also talk about how to combine bodyweight training with cardio to do something he calls "cardiosthenics" that's great for fat loss.Resources Related to the Podcast Anthony's previous appearances on the AoM podcast: Episode #177: Homemade Muscle & Bodyweight Training Episode #319: Why Every Man Should Have a Workout Ritual AoM Podcast #652: Mise-en-Place — How Chefs Organize Their Work AoM Podcast #888: The Science of a Better Daily Routine AoM Article (By Anthony): How to Break Through a Push-Up Plateau (Using the Mind-to-Muscle Connection) AoM Article: The Groundhog Day Diet — Why I Eat the Same Thing Every Day AoM series on how to use gymnastic rings AoM article and podcast about Zone 2 cardio Pull-up bar/dip station Anthony's video about his warm-up routine Anthony's video of an example of a full-week bodyweight routine Anthony's video on a "cardiosthenics" beginner's routine Connect With Anthony Arvanitakis The 7 A.M. Workout Edge Website Bodyweight Muscle YouTube Channel Bodyweight Muscle Website See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Once a year, I read The Road by Cormac McCarthy. It’s a cathartic annual ritual for me. What is it about this novel that has such an impact on my soul and those of other readers? Who is the man who wrote it, and what was he trying to do with this story of a father and son struggling to survive in a post-apocalyptic landscape?For answers to these questions, I decided to talk to a foremost expert on McCarthy’s work, as well as the literature of the American West in general. His name is Steven Frye and he’s a professor of English, a novelist in his own right, and the author and editor of several books about the reclusive, philosophical author, including Understanding Cormac McCarthy. We begin our conversation with some background on McCarthy and a discussion of his distinctive style and themes, and why he avoids the limelight and prefers to hang out with scientists over fellow artists. We then dive into The Road, and Steve unpacks what inspired it, as well as the authors and books that influenced it. We then dig into the big themes of The Road, and how it can be read as a biblical allegory that wrestles with the existence of God. We delve into the tension which exists between the father and son in the book, and what it means to “carry the fire.” We end our conversation with why reading The Road makes you feel both depressed and hopeful at the same time.A spoiler alert here: If you haven’t read The Road yet, we do reveal some of the plot points in this discussion. Also, why haven’t you read The Road yet?Resources Related to the Podcast Other books by Steven Frye, including his novel Dogwood Crossing McCarthy’s books mentioned in the show: The Road All the Pretty Horses Blood Meridian The Orchard Keeper No Country for Old Men The Sunset Limited The film adaptation of The Road The Santa Fe Institute Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky “Cat in the Rain” — short story by Ernest Hemingway “Indian Camp” — short story by Ernest Hemingway AoM Podcast #635: The Existentialist’s Survival Guide AoM Article: Carry the Fire AoM Article: Books So Good I’ve Read Them 2X (Or More!) Connect With Steven FryeSteve’s websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When we think about Stoic philosophers, we typically think about the thinkers of ancient Greece and Rome, like Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius. But my guest, Mark Matousek, says there was an incredibly insightful Stoic philosopher who lived on the American continent in more modern times: Ralph Waldo Emerson.Matousek is the author of Lessons from an American Stoic: How Emerson Can Change Your Life, and today on the show, he shares how Stoicism and Transcendentalism overlap and how you can use Emerson's Stoic philosophy to become a nonconformist. We discuss the lessons you can learn from Emerson on developing self-reliance, embracing the strengths of your weaknesses, trusting your own genius instead of imitating others, gaining confidence from nature, compensating for the difficulties of relationships through the joy of deeper connections, living with greater courage, and more.Resources Related to the Podcast Emerson's essay "Self-Reliance" "I Sing the Body Electric" by Walt Whitman AoM Article: A Man's Guide to Self-Reliance AoM Article: Emerson’s Advice on How to Read for Greater Self-Reliance AoM Article: 31 Journaling Prompts for Building Greater Self-Reliance AoM Podcast #384: What It Really Means to Be Self-Reliant AoM Podcast #894: Thoreau on Making a Living AoM Podcast #861: 7 Journaling Techniques That Can Change Your Life Sunday Firesides: Despise Not the Thing That Would Save You Sunday Firesides: Look Into the Tomb Connect With Mark Matousek Mark's website The Seekers Forum See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In 1980s America, gritty streets were filled with crime, the threat of Cold War hovered in the air, and action movies starring tough guy heroes dominated the box office. This was a time in cinema when muscle, martial arts, and the perfect weapon were the keys to saving the day; when the likes of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone ruled the silver screen and their on-screen carnage was only rivaled by their off-screen competition.Why did this golden age of action movies emerge when it did, and why don't they make films like that anymore? Here to chart the rise and fall of the golden age of action movies is Nick de Semlyen, author of The Last Action Heroes, The Triumphs, Flops, and Feuds of Hollywood's Kings of Carnage. Today on the show, Nick shares the stories behind the larger-than-life stars of the action genre — including Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Chuck Norris, and Steven Seagal — and the iconic films they starred in. He also discusses why the action genre fell out of favor in the early 90s, why its movies nonetheless continue to endure in popularity, and the three action films he most recommends watching.Connect With Nick de Semlyen Nick's website Nick on IG Nick on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When people think about survival and preparedness, they tend to think of dealing with an end-of-the-world kind of scenario. But lots of bad things can happen, and are more likely to happen, that fall short of the apocalypse. My guest can help you prepare for any worst case scenario, whether it’s the worst thing to happen to mankind or just the worst thing to happen to you this year. His name is Mike Glover, and he’s a former Green Beret, the founder of Fieldcraft Survival, and the author of Prepared.Today on the show, Mike and I first talk about the softer skills of preparedness. We discuss how to create plans using military concepts like war gaming and the PACE methodology, build your tolerance to stress, and develop your situational awareness so you don’t freeze in a crisis or let one catch you by surprise. In the second half of our conversation, we discuss the harder skills of preparing for worst case scenarios. Mike outlines what capabilities every man should develop. He shares his own EDC and what he recommends you carry and wear on a day-to-day basis. We talk about how to stock your home and car for emergencies and more.Related Resources From AoM’s Extensive Survival and Preparedness Archives Podcast #820: Escape the Safety Trap How to Make a Bug Out Bag: Your 72-Hour Emergency Evacuation Survival Kit How to Bug-In: What You Need to Know to Survive a Grid-Down Disaster What Every Man Should Keep in His Car A Beginner’s Guide to EDC How to Use a Tourniquet to Control Major Bleeding A Complete Guide to Home Fire Prevention and Safety How to Develop Situational Awareness The Complete Guide to Making a DIY First Aid Kit Podcast #610: Who Lives in Survival Situations, Who Dies, and Why A Complete Guide to Home Security Connect With Mike Glover Mike on IG Fieldcraft Survival Website Fieldcraft Survival YouTube Channel Fieldcraft Survival Podcast Listen to the Podcast! (And don’t forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code “manliness” at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.Transcript Coming SoonSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To be successful at their craft, magicians must possess the well-honed technical skills to pull off their mystifying tricks and clever sleights of hand. But as magician Steve Cohen observes, they must also be "masters at attracting interest, holding attention, and leaving audiences with fond memories of their time together" — skills that everyone can use to persuade audiences, charm dates, own a room, and influence others.Steve, also known as the Millionaires' Magician, is the author Win the Crowd: Unlock the Secrets of Influence, Charisma, and Showmanship. Today on the show, Steve shares the insights he and his fellow magicians know on everything from taking command of a room to creating a compelling character to making a magical entrance. Steve shares how to build your boldness through "put pocketing," develop "spontaneous resourcefulness," get people wrapped up in the magic of your message by suggesting rather than stating, increase your confidence by having a place for everything and everything in its place, and much more. At the end of our conversation, he shares two of his most interesting tips and explains how to influence people to do what you want by using "layered commands" and the "trailing or."Resources Related to the Podcast Steve on the Late Show with David Letterman A look at what the Chamber Magic show is like on Good Day New York AoM Article: Command a Room Like a Man AoM Podcast #306: What a Magician Can Teach You About Being More Successful AoM Podcast #890: Toastmasters, Aristotle, and the Essential Art of Rhetoric AoM Article: A Place for Everything and Everything in Its Place What's the Deal With Mickey Mouse's Ears? Connect With Steve CohenChamber Magic websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You might think we’re heading into a low time of year for suicides because they peak during the cold, dark months of winter. But, in fact, suicide peaks during the spring and early summer.This is just one example of the popular beliefs around suicide that turn out to be myths. Here to unpack more of these myths, as well as the truths around this poorly understood subject, is Rory O’Connor, the leader of the Suicidal Behaviour Research Laboratory and the author of When It Is Darkest: Why People Die by Suicide and What We Can Do to Prevent It. Today on the show, Rory discusses possible reasons for why suicides go up in the warmer months and why men die by suicide more often than women. He explains that suicide doesn’t happen without some warning signs and why someone’s improved mood might be one of them. In the second half of the show, Rory walks us through the real reasons people move from having suicidal thoughts to acting on them, and what works to prevent suicide.Resources Related to the Podcast The Suicide and Crisis Lifeline The Suicidal Behaviour Research Laboratory Atlantic article: “The Troubling Link Between Springtime Allergies and Suicide” AoM Podcast #585: Inflammation, Saunas, and the New Science of Depression AoM Podcast #886: What the World of Psychology Gets Wrong About Men AoM Podcast #756: How the Desire for Status Explains (Pretty Much) Everything “Why Men Kill Themselves” by Will Storr Connect With Rory O’ConnorRory’s faculty pageSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Have you been languishing in the same role at work, frustrated that you haven't been promoted to a higher position with more pay and different responsibilities?My guest can help you level up in your career. His name is Randy Ornstein, and he's the author of Grow: The Essential Guide to Getting Promoted. Today on the show, Randy explains why getting promoted is more beneficial to your paycheck than getting a raise and his case for why you should stick with working for the same company for a long time. We then talk about the things you need to do so that management thinks of you the next time a higher position opens up. We discuss how promotable employees participate in meetings, execute their communication, study their work, and develop best practices. We also talk about when to bring up the idea of being promoted to your boss and a couple of the challenges that can come with advancing up the ranks.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Article: How To Become the Go-to Guy at Work AoM Article: How to Be Manager to Your Friends and Peers AoM Podcast #273: How to Get a Job Promotion This Year Connect With Randy OrnsteinRandy on LinkedInSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When people think of the paratroopers of World War II, they tend to think of the European theater — the 101st Airborne Division and the Band of Brothers.But paratroopers were also deployed in the Pacific, and here to unpack their lesser-known but equally epic and heroic story is James Fenelon, a former paratrooper himself and the author of Angels Against the Sun: A WWII Saga of Grunts, Grit, and Brotherhood. Today on the show, James tells us about the formation, leadership, and training of the 11th Airborne Division, the role they played in the campaigns of the Pacific — which included being dropped one by one out of a tiny plane described as a “lawnmower with wings” —how they built a reputation as one of the war’s most lethal units, and the division’s surprising connection to the creation of the Twilight Zone. At the end of our conversation, James shares what lessons we all can take away from the exploits and spirit of the 11th Airborne.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Podcast #1: We Who Are Alive and Remain AoM Article: Motivational Posters — Band of Brothers Edition Lieutenant General Joseph Swing Colonel Orin “Hard Rock” Haugen Medal of Honor citation for Private First Class Manuel Perez Jr. “Combat in Twilight: Rod Serling’s World War II” Connect With James FenelonJames’ WebsiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The charge to be well-mannered, to treat others with civility, kindness, and respect, is perennial. But the rules for how to carry those manners into action, the rules of good etiquette, change over time.Given all the cultural and technological changes modern society has experienced, it's not always easy to know the best practices for a contemporary gentleman. Here to offer some guidance on that front is Thomas Farley, aka, Mr. Manners. Today on the show, Thomas offers some answers to the frequently asked questions around modern etiquette, including when to send a handwritten thank you note, whether "no problem" is an appropriate response to "thank you," if it's okay to ghost someone, how to deal with our ever proliferating and out-of-control tipping culture, whether it's okay to exclude kids from your wedding, if you should still open a door for a woman, and more.Resources Related to the Podcast Extensive Manners and Etiquette Archives How Manners Made the World The Importance of Good Manners How to Acquire Good Manners The Art of Thank You Note Writing The Unclassified Laws of Etiquette How to Accept a Compliment With Class The Ins and Outs of Opening a Door for a Woman A Primer on Wedding Etiquette How to Tame the Timing Anxiety Around Texting Podcast #718: How to Use Digital Body Language to Build Trust and Connection Podcast #162: Digital Manners & Etiquette For the Modern Man Podcast #422: Men & Manners — Tipping, Emojis, and Much More Connect With Thomas FarleyThomas' websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Do you feel stuck in life — that you aren’t making progress in a relationship, job, or goal and you don’t know how to fix the problem and move forward? Well, perhaps you can take a little solace in the fact that it’s a universal human experience, even amongst history’s highest achievers. Indeed, when Adam Alter, a social psychologist and professor of marketing, looked at the lives of successful actors, musicians, writers, filmmakers, and entrepreneurs, he found that they all had passed through times in their lives and careers when they felt totally stuck.Today on the show, Adam, who’s the author of Anatomy of a Breakthrough: How to Get Unstuck When It Matters Most, explains why getting stuck is an inevitability in life, as well as mindset shifts and practices to escape from stuckness. We first talk about what contributes to getting stuck, including the goal gradient effect, and how the illusion of the creative cliff can keep you from seeing that you may end up doing your best work later in life. We then talk about dealing with the emotional angst of feeling stuck, and how it can be better to initially accept your stuckness than kick against the pricks. From there, we turn to some tactics for getting unstuck, including doing a friction audit and copying the work of others. In my favorite part of the conversation, we discuss the importance of recognizing when to move from exploring to exploiting, and vice versa. We end our conversation with why the mantra for getting unstuck is “action over all.”Resources Related to the Podcast Adam’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #420: What Makes Your Phone So Addictive & How to Take Back Your Life a-ha’s video for “Take on Me” Giannis on whether he considers this season a failure AoM Article: Meditations on the Wisdom of Action AoM Article: Want to Become a Better Writer? Copy the Work of Others AoM Article: Solvitur Ambulando — It Is Solved By Walking AoM Podcast #418: How to Get Unstuck AoM Podcast#432: How to Achieve Creative Success AoM Podcast #512: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World Connect with Adam Alter Adam on LinkedIn Adam on Twitter Adam’s website See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

America’s national parks are one of the country’s greatest treasures, and many people have it on their bucket list to visit one or more of these gems. But figuring out where to go and how to execute a national park experience can sometimes feel a little overwhelming.Here to offer some really helpful advice on both visiting and camping in the national parks is Jeremy Puglisi, co-author, along with his wife Stephanie, of Where Should We Camp Next?: National Parks: The Best Campgrounds and Unique Outdoor Accommodations In and Around National Parks, Seashores, Monuments, and More. Today on the show, Jeremy walks us through how to navigate the complex reservation system some of the parks have in place and what it takes to secure a campsite inside the parks. He then shares his best tips for getting the most out of a national park experience in general, as well as when you’re visiting some of the country’s most iconic destinations, including Yosemite, Yellowstone, and the Grand Canyon. At the end of our conversation, Jeremy shares the national parks he thinks are underrated, and if you want to avoid the crowds of the national parks, he also shares his picks for the country’s best state parks.Resources Related to the Podcast Jeremy’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #711: — How to Plan the Ultimate Road Trip recreation.gov nps.gov KOA campgrounds AoM Article: Beat the Crowds (And the Fees) With Dispersed Camping Connect With Jeremy Puglisi The RV Atlas website The RV Atlas podcast RV Atlas on Instagram RV Atlas on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We don't often think of work when we think of Henry David Thoreau. We think of Thoreau living with his family, or loafing around at a cabin at Walden, and mostly spending his days walking and enjoying nature. We know he did some writing, sure, but often think of him as being largely the abstract thinker type.But Thoreau was a man of much practical skill, who lived a life of both thought and action. He did lots of kinds of work — from carpentry to surveying to helping raise Ralph Waldo Emerson's kids — and thought a lot about the nature of work, both the paid variety and the kind that's necessary for simply sustaining day-to-day life. Today on the show, John Kaag, a professor of philosophy and the co-author of Henry at Work: Thoreau on Making a Living, shares some of Thoreau's insights on work with us. We discuss what Thoreau can teach us about the value of resignation, the importance of continuing to work with your hands to maintain what Thoreau called your "vital heat," what makes for meaningful work, and the trap of working in bad faith. We end our conversation with a call to consider what you're really being paid for in your job and the true cost of the things you buy.Resources Related to the Podcast John's previous appearances on the AoM podcast: AoM Podcast #480: Hiking With Nietzsche AoM Podcast #576: A Treasure Trove of American Philosophy Walden by Henry David Thoreau Emerson's eulogy for Thoreau AoM Article: How to REALLY Avoid Living a Life of Quiet Desperation Sunday Firesides: The Cost of a Thing Shop Class as Soulcraft: An Inquiry into the Value of Work by Matthew B. Crawford Connect With John KaagJohn's faculty pageSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When men think about optimizing their hormones, they tend only to think about raising their testosterone. But while increasing T can be important, an ideal health profile also means having testosterone that's in balance with your other hormones as well.Today on the show, Dr. Kyle Gillett joins me to discuss both of those prongs of all-around hormone optimization. We start with a quick overview of the different hormones that affect male health. We then get into what qualifies as low testosterone and how to accurately test yours. We also discuss what causes low testosterone in individual men, and how its decline in the general male population may be linked to both birth control and the world wars. In the second half of our conversation, we discuss how to both raise testosterone and get rid of excess estrogen, including the use of some effective supplements you may never have heard of. We then get into the risks and benefits of taking TRT, before ending our discussion with what young men can do to prepare for a lifetime of optimal T and hormonal health.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM series on testosterone, including How I Doubled My Testosterone Levels Naturally AoM Podcast #761: How Testosterone Makes Men, Men AoM Podcast #878: The Fitness Supplements That Actually Work Connect With Dr. Kyle Gillett Kyle on IG Gillett Health Podcast on Spotify and Apple Gillett Health on YouTube Gillett Health website See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When Daniel Zia Joseph decided to join the Army at the unusually late age of 32, he solicited advice from his buddies who had served in the military on how to succeed in the experience and become a good officer and leader. Today, he passes on these leadership lessons to us.Dan is the author of Backpack to Rucksack: Insight Into Leadership and Resilience From Military Experts, and he first shares why he decided to join the Army at an older age and what he would tell other guys who keep thinking about doing the same thing. We talk about how he prepared himself to be a leader and how getting his masters in organizational psychology helped deepen his development. We then discuss the lessons his military mentors imparted to him, including why you should pursue attrition, the importance of command climate, using psychological jiu-jitsu, and the difference between garrison and field leadership.Resources Related to the Podcast Dan's video about joining the military after age 30 AoM Podcast #875: Authority Is More Important Than Social Skills AoM Article: Are You a Strategist or an Operator? Once an Eagle by Anton Myrer Connect With Dan JosephDan's website — Combat PsychSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Writing an email while on a Zoom call. Talking on the phone while walking. Scrolling through social media while watching a movie.In both our work and our play, we’re all doing more and more multitasking. Doing two things at once makes us feel as if we’re more efficient and getting more done.But my guest would say that all this task juggling actually makes us less productive, while diminishing the quality of our work and stressing our minds, and that we’d be better off curbing our multitasking in favor of monotasking. His name is Thatcher Wine and he’s the author of The Twelve Monotasks: Do One Thing at a Time to Do Everything Better. Today on the show, Thatcher explains the illusions around multitasking and the benefits of monotasking — that is, bringing our full focus to a single task at a time. We discuss why reading is a foundational part of becoming a monotasker, and then get into some of the other activities Thatcher recommends monotasking, including walking, listening, traveling/commuting, and thinking. Thatcher argues that doing things like listening to a podcast while cleaning your house isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but that you may want to try stripping everything away from your daily tasks except the primary tasks themselves to observe the resulting effect and to strengthen your “monotasking muscles” and rebuild your attention span. Once you’ve experimented with doing a task alone, you can then decide to layer back in the second activity, or, maybe decide you actually liked giving it your all.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM podcast episodes with Cal Newport on Deep Work and Digital Minimalism AoM podcast with Oliver Burkeman on Time Management for Mortals AoM podcast with Nicolas Carr on how the internet affects our minds and attention AoM series on how to improve your listening AoM article on the benefits of being fully present AoM article on working when you work, and playing when you play Connect With Thatcher Wine Companion Website to the Monotasking Book Thatcher’s Website Juniper Books See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Different generations love to cast aspersions on each other. Boomers think Millennials and Gen Zers are fragile narcissists. Those younger generations think that Boomers are selfish, closed-minded pinheads who helped themselves to economic success and then pulled the ladder out for everyone else.But are these and other generational stereotypes true? Here to unpack that question for us is Jean Twenge, a professor of psychology and the author of Generations: The Real Differences between Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, Boomers, and Silents—and What They Mean for America’s Future. We begin our conversation with some background on the study of generations and why Jean thinks the Strauss-Howe theory of generational cycles has been disrupted. We then work our way through the generations, from the Silent Generation to the present, and talk about the characteristics and particular challenges of each cohort. We dig into the myths and truths of the generations, such as whether Boomers are doing financially well and Millennials are doing financially poorly. We talk about why Gen X gets overlooked, why there’s such a sharp break between Millennials and Gen Z, why Gen Zers are taking longer to get their drivers’ licenses and feel darkly pessimistic, and much more.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM article on the Strauss-Howe generational cycle theory AoM Podcast #236: What the Generational Cycle Theory Can Tell Us About Our Present Age (With Neil Howe) AoM Article: A New Generation of Prigs, Prudes, and Squares AoM Article: How Millennials Could Be the Next Greatest Generation of Personal Finance AoM Podcast: #751: The Rise of the Religious “Nones” (And What It Means for Society) Atlantic article by Jean: “The Myth of the Broke Millennial” Connect With Jean TwengeJean’s websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When John Bowe learned that his extremely reclusive cousin, who had lived for decades in his parents' basement, had moved out and gotten married at the age of fifty-nine, John was extremely surprised. What made him equally surprised was how his cousin had finally launched his life. It hadn't been meds or therapy. Instead, he had joined his local Toastmasters club.Duly intrigued, John set off on his own Toastmasters journey, as he details in his book I Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in an Age of Disconnection. Today on the show, John shares how he discovered that the ethos of this nonprofit organization parallels the tradition of rhetoric espoused by the ancient Greeks, especially by Aristotle, and why the ability to speak, whether in the context of giving a formal speech or simply having a conversation, continues to be such an essential skill in the modern age. In my favorite part of the show, we discuss how our ideas of authentic speech can actually get in the way of expressing our authentic selves. We then turn to the techniques for better speaking that John learned from joining Toastmasters and how Toastmasters ultimately transformed his own life.After the show is over, check out the show notes at aom.is/toastmastersResources Related to the Podcast Toastmasters International AoM Podcast #698: The Secrets of Public Speaking From History’s Greatest Orators AoM Article: An Introduction to Public Speaking AoM Podcast #639: Why You Should Learn the Lost Art of Rhetoric AoM series on classical rhetoric Rhetoric by Aristotle The Fall of Public Man by Richard Sennett AoM series on overcoming shyness AoM Article: How to Minimize Your Uh’s and Um’s Sunday Firesides: Want to Solve Your Social Problems? Get Over Your Self "How to Speak in Public" — article in Psyche magazine by John Connect With John BoweJohn's websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When most people think of psychopaths, they think of uniformly monstrous characters who lack empathy and conscience.But my guest says that those characteristics are just one part of the spectrum of traits that make up psychopathy, and while always having these traits turned up high is indeed bad, when employed to certain degrees in certain circumstances, they can actually be utilized for adaptive, positive ends.Kevin Dutton is a researcher of experimental psychology at Oxford and the author of The Wisdom of Psychopaths: What Saints, Spies, and Serial Killers Can Teach Us About Success. Today on the show, Kevin first defines what makes psychopaths, psychopaths, and how they differ from sociopaths. He describes how psychopathic traits can be particularly useful in some professions and which professions attract the most psychopaths. In the second half of our conversation, Kevin lays out his argument for why he thinks the Apostle Paul was a psychopath and how that’s actually what made him such an effective evangelist. At the end of our conversation, Kevin offers a test that assesses psychopathy; stay tuned to find out if I’m a psychopath and take the test yourself to see if you are.Connect With Kevin Dutton Kevin on Twitter Kevin on IG Kevin’s website See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There's plenty of advice out there about how to have a better daily routine. But what's just bunk and what actually works to improve the quality of your day and your overall life?My guest, medical-doctor-turned-science-educator Stuart Farrimond, took a deep dive into the research to find the authoritative answers to that question, and he shares them in his book Live Your Best Life: 219 Science-Based Reasons to Rethink Your Daily Routine. Today on the show, we walk through a daily routine, from morning to night, and Dr. Farrimond shares some best practices to make the most of it. We discuss why waking up to an alarm clock feels so terrible, why you shouldn't drink coffee first thing in the morning, the ideal length for an afternoon nap, how to improve your commute, the best time of day to exercise, and more.Resources Related to the Podcast AoM Article: What Every Man Should Know About Sleep AoM Article: The Digestive Power of an After-Dinner Walk "It’s Not Just What You Eat, but the Time of Day You Eat It" AoM Article: How to Stop Your Snoring AoM Article: Unleash the Power of the Nap Sunday Firesides: Your Routine Needs Rites of Passage Connect With Stuart Farrimond Stuart on IG Stuart on Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.