Real Recovery Talk

In today's episode, Ben and I talk with Nick, a client here at Rock Recovery Center. Nick originates from Cleveland, Ohio, and this is his first time in recovery at the age of 27. Listen in to this episode to find out how he became addicted to drugs at 11. At a very young age, his first experience was smoking pot at age 11 and had his first drink at 12. Nick is close to his sister, whom he spent many afternoons after school hanging out. Nick followed his dad, playing the same sports. His father was "more of a coach than a dad," coaching Nick in the sports he participated in as young as age three. His father always pushed him to be good at what he did in life. He also remembers his father hiding alcohol bottles around the house and drinking for hours by himself in the garage. In addition, Nick's dad would pass out in the hallway, drunk in the hotels, at sporting competitions. His mother is clean and has never been addicted to drugs. At 13, Nick was in a fight and had several teeth knocked out. This led him to take narcotic pain medication. He quickly realized that taking a pain killer was a release from the physical pain from playing multiple sports. His parents did not monitor his pain medication and worked full-time. At 16, he had teeth pulled and had narcotics prescribed. Nick's doctor trusted he would take the narcotics as directed and is the reason he is addicted to drugs. When he moved out of his house at 17 to play hockey, he moved in with three guys addicted to pain medication from multiple sports injuries. Nick brought the pot, and his friend came with narcotic drugs. Drugs ended up being a commonality between the two for the next four years. He was kicked out of college and lost his scholarship. At this point, Nick returned home and went to community college and worked at a car dealership. Daily drinking eventually turned into a "game," where he and his friend would binge drink driving home from work. Nick finally realized that he needed help when his daughter was born, and he couldn't spend time with her because he needed to use drugs. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:07] Nick introduces himself and talks about how he became addicted. [08:03] He didn't like drinking when he was young, but had his first drink at 12. [12:02] The progression of Nick's addiction from the age of 16. [15:40] Nick's college experience. [21:39] What led Nick to seek help at Rock Recovery Center. [27:24] COVID hit and he stopped going to his recovery meetings back home. [31:59] Nick talks about the relapse that moved him into recovery. [35:17] Ben tells how hard he works to stay sober ten years after he stopped using. [36:54] Recovery expectations when Nick came in the center. [41:23] Tom's challenge to Nick in recovery. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

In today's episode, Ben and I will talk about how addicts can get accustomed to the lifestyle of alcohol and drugs. It's often problematic for addicts to comprehend how to live a "normal" life without the use of illegal substances. Ben and I are both AA graduates, and our experience of sobriety results from working hard to successfully complete the 12 steps of sobriety outlined in AA. This work brought a spiritual foundation into my life, and this is what my sobriety hinges on today. There are multiple modalities and programs in which you can find sobriety, the 12 step program being one program. If this program doesn't work for you, please seek out a drug and alcohol program that appeals to you and gives you hope. Whatever way you choose, sobriety is your goal. The fruits of sobriety will give your life the positive change you are looking for to live a better life. In section 83 of the AA book, there is a section titled "The Nine-Step Promises." One promise, "We are going to find new freedom and a new happiness." Freedom and happiness are different for each person. Freedom can be relief from feeling the physical trauma to feeling mentally free from the reliance on addiction. Serenity and peace are two other aspects we are focusing on today. When you acquire these two feelings, you are OK sitting by yourself, without anxiety, want, or fear. Conflict resolution is a large part of achieving these two qualities for yourself. There are tools we learn to create change within ourselves or our situation, even if we can't change the world around us. These tools lead to achieving peace and serenity inside ourselves. The Big Book talks about the fear of uselessness and self-pity. When you feel like you don't amount to anything, self-pity creeps into your life. You may feel like you will never have a family, go to college, or be happy. This is a destructive cycle for addicts, which disappears when you become clean. Some grapple with the higher power aspect of AA. If a "higher power" isn't in your life, you can also shoot for a higher purpose. What is your purpose? Find a positive change to make in someone else's life. When you are sober, your outlook on life will change because your mind will clear, and you will see situations differently. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:17] Imagining a life without drugs and alcohol is hard to comprehend for addicts. [05:18] No matter what your substance is, what you need to move forward is a design for living. [06:55] The Nine-Step Promises that AA lists in their book. [10:07] There is no true freedom when we are tied to another substance. [13:19] Learning conflict resolution to achieve peace and serenity. [18:00] Fear of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. [22:51] Higher power and higher purpose. [26:19] The root of our problems is selfishness and self-centeredness. [27:44] Attitude and outlook on life will change when you become sober. [32:52] Read the big book from AA to find out more aspects of your life that can change when you become sober. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

In today's episode, Ben and I discuss the turning point when a newly sober client can start to make decisions for themselves. In the beginning, the person in recovery will be assigned a sponsor who is there for support and answering questions. Along the process, there's become a point in time that the person who is healing needs to become more independent and start to create change for themselves. Working with thousands of people through the recovery process, Ben and I see many different cases. We receive feedback from clients and become a sounding board for those in recovery. A vast majority of the time, we will confirm that the sponsor gives the patient sound advice. However, the individual moving through the healing process needs to take the responsibility of making their own decisions. Even though Ben is almost ten years sober, he still utilizes his support circle when he is in a challenging situation or bad day. In the end, Ben makes his own decisions for himself, but having a good, solid support group to assist you in your decision making is very important to stay on your path of sobriety. A sponsor's responsibility is no longer just taking someone through the steps. A client is calling with many different issues for advice from their sponsor. There is a progression of questioning where at first, clients are asking for almost anything. However, there should be situations where someone can take an independent step on their own. Growth will enable someone to become an independent decision-maker. Developing a GOD Power or the ability to deliver Good Orderly Direction gives you the ability to consciously figuring out problems on your own. By taking inventory of your behaviors, through the practice of working the program, and learning how to make situations right, you develop your skills to become an independent person. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:45] Ben's experiences with clients who want to rely solely on their sponsor for help. [06:55] When you should be making your own decisions and not relying on someone else to make your decisions for you. [08:20] Ben and his sponsor relationship. [09:40] An example of bouncing ideas off of a sponsor for advice. [13:19] A sponsor's responsibility to their charge. [14:33] Dating another person who is going through recovery. [15:37] The progression scale of learning how to become an independent decision maker. [17:35] Developing GOD Power - Good Orderly Direction. [18:32] Step ten of the 12 Step Program. [19:57] The importance of having a clear outcome. [21:10] Looking at failure as an opportunity to learn. [22:04] Giving sober supports too much power in your life. [25:17] Sponsors need to give their charges the opportunity to have experiences in life. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

In today's episode, Ben and I discuss how we measure our client's progress and what to expect in the first one to three months of recovery treatment. We'll talk about where we see our clients make the most common mistakes and where addicts fall short in the treatment process. During our team meeting once a week, our staff discusses challenges and celebrations among our patients. "One issue that jumped out at us yesterday is video game addiction." Ben believes that this addiction can significantly sidetrack the recovery process, slowing it down. One negative effect is the disruption in client sleep cycles. In this episode, Ben gives real client examples of the adverse effects of video game addiction. We choose not to restrict our members from the outside world because that is unrealistic. This gives us the chance to see negative behaviors in our clients and the opportunity to correct those during their recovery period. "I want to know the truth about people and what their behavior truly looks like. I don't want some version of them that I'm creating, that's not organic by putting parameters on what they are allowed to do and not allowed to do." Our team looks at how our clients are utilizing their treatment time outside of scheduled activities. We hold our clients accountable for their treatment homework and follow-up to ensure they have their assignments completed before their scheduled time. Clients need to complete their task, as working through recovery involves learning about yourself. If a client doesn't do their homework, they will not progress through therapy. Getting into the habit and responsibility of completing your homework in therapy gives you an understanding of what it takes to continue your work outside of treatment. When you consistently complete assignments, you give yourself the foundation to continue your work when you leave our recovery center. This usually results in clients who are more successful at continuing their recovery for life. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:49] The process at Rock Recovery center for information intake. [05:40] Examples of video game addiction. [09:20] Ben talks about the importance of seeing bad behaviors so they can be addressed. [11:34] A good determinate of how our clients are going to do post-treatment is how they are progressing during treatment. [13:45] How a client spends their time during treatment versus after they leave and what they are doing with their friends. [17:35] When clients don't do their homework in rehab, they typically don't follow-up outside of rehab. [19:33] Our team wants to see the effort our clients put in at Rock Recovery Center. [20:11] Those who focus on others instead of themselves is a red flag. [23:42] We are here to be part of the process, however; a client must be willing to learn. [27:57] Behaviors that can lead to relapse. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

In today's episode, Ben and I are discussing the risk versus reward for addicts. We talk about the real risk of dying from a drug overdose as opposed to the more minimal chance of passing away from contracting COVID when traveling to a rehab facility or attending AA meetings. Many facilities have removed group gatherings at their location. As a result, many addicts are not able to attend their rehab meetings in person. Some have been able to participate in online, however; it's easier to not go to meetings when it's no in person. Some facilities are moving forward with meetings, requiring masks and temperature screenings. Others have locked down entirely and aren't taking anyone who isn't a part of their program, leaving addicts without options for recovery. COVID has removed much of the community for many recovering alcoholics and drug addicts. People are afraid to catch the virus and won't go to groups, or they don't have the means to meet online. We need to build and cultivate options for people until groups open back up regularly. Person to person meetings have a more personal feel, and Ben has made a choice to attend real-life sessions. There are restrictions in place for safety, such as masks and social distancing. Many others have decided that drug and alcohol relapse is more harmful to their health than the risk of catching COVID. Additionally, you can't blame COVID-19 for all of your problems or as the sole reason for going back to being an addict. COVID is a stressor and it does create anxiety, however; you have to apply the tools you learn in recovery to overcome the challenges in life. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:31] Benjamin discusses his personal experience with recovery. [07:00] Recovery built on the aspect of community for sobriety and recovery. [09:12] Ben talks about the importance of spirituality and community. [12:57] Many parents are scared to send their loved ones to rehab in Florida. [14:22] Being vigilant about health standards has been a key piece for reducing the spread of COVID in addiction groups. [16:45] How a halfway house has more people die of drug overdose but none of their members died of COVID. [18:04] The elements of building a solid foundation of recovery. [22:32] Some clients were caught off-guard when they had to leave recovery. [24:36] Precautions we are taking at Real Rock Recovery Center to protect our clients. [27:29] Ben is glad he is continuing meetings and staying sober and clean. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

"There's always hope, you have to take the first steps." -Tony In today's episode, I'm talking with a current patient who has been with us at Rock Recovery Center for three weeks and is 31 days clean today! He is 37 years old and comes to us from Detroit, Michigan. His sister would take care of him and his siblings, as his mom was "in and out a lot" as a result of her addiction to drugs and alcohol. He didn't lead a "normal" childhood life and grew up on the rough streets of Detroit. Tony remembers visiting his aunt and cousins, who lived down the road. When his father found out where he was living, he drove to Detroit and moved in with his mom. They were trying to mend their marriage when his dad died of an asthma attack in 1992 when Tony was seven years old. Tony found himself in the same previous situation with his mom's addiction and his unstable childhood. Tony and his siblings were dispersed among both sides of the family, he ended up with his grandmother and a violent uncle. At the age of 16, Tony decided he had enough and left his home to find his mom. He enrolled in school and stayed with his mom. He grew up in and out of foster care as a result of his mother's addiction and ran away from the group home where he was living. At the age of 17, he remembers meeting up with other kids who ran away and recalled taking his first drink of alcohol. "I don't know if I liked it, but I did notice that it got me out of myself. It made me more comfortable with my surroundings and what was going on at that time." As a child of mixed races, Tony experienced racism from both white and black communities and felt that he never "fit in" either culture. He started working out and landed a job as a bouncer in a local nightclub. Tony found it easy to hang out with the girls who worked there, who were also addicts. At this point, he was introduced to cocaine, and he found he liked the excitement and attention he was getting. He started experimenting with shooting up the pills and found out that he needed to have his opiates to feel good. Tony then realized that heroin was cheaper and easier to use and became addicted to heroin. Listen in to find out how Tony hit rock bottom and finally ended up clean at Rock Recovery Center. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:49] Tony's story of how he got into drugs and alcohol. [04:36] How alcohol gave Tony comfort from his feelings. [08:15] Growing up with his uncle and grandmother. [11:09] He looks for his missing mom at a local bar she frequented. [13:44] Why Tony hung out with other kids who drank alcohol. [17:15] Drinking on the weekend was the "thing to do" with his cousins. [19:34] Getting involved with the females who worked at the club with him. [21:19] How Tony became addicted to opiates in addition to alcohol and cocaine. [25:22] Ending up homeless and on the streets as a result of heroin use. [27:50] Tony opens up about his faith and how his belief became his guide in life. [30:36] Prayer and how this has helped Tony with his recovery from addiction. [33:29] How he made the decision to put 100% of himself into his recovery. [34:49] Tony's advice to current users and drug addicts. [37:05] Sharing your story of addiction with the right person. [42:06] Giving up your will, prayer and the practice of being a good person. [45:52] Impacting people you wouldn't have been able to reach if you weren't a recovering addict. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

In today's episode, Benjamin and I are going to talk about the "why" behind being an addict. Drinking and doing drugs is a cover for an underlying emotional issue that must be addressed to fully recover successfully. Our clients, because of the choices they have made in the past, do not have the best behavior or comments when they are moving through the process of recovery. In today's episode, Ben and I will talk about questions and feedback we hear from clients most often, and how we respond to their concerns. If you're in a treatment program, make sure to really focus on treatment so you can get better and move on with your life. Realize the recovery process, to be successful, take time. You may have been an addict for over a decade - spending two weeks in recovery will not give you enough time to recognize what you need to change. Also, realize that you will need to not only be aware of the emotional issues that ended you up in recovery, but you'll also need to process these emotions and be mindful of triggers that can lead to continuing your addictive behavior. It's also easy to be in a mindset of not wanting to drink or do drugs, but that alone will not lead to a successful recovery. We talk about the six legs of alcoholism, including consequences, which, in and of themselves, are not enough to give you a clean and sober life. Some clients want to get back to their family and responsibilities. However, we see clients that leave early as they have self-evaluated they are OK, they go home and continue their addiction. Many times, you weren't helping before you came to rehab, as your addiction came first. You were most likely stealing and being an emotional and spiritual burden to your loved ones. When you're not ready to leave, you aren't prepared to take care of someone else, let alone take care of yourself. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:27] Why people come for treatment at Rock Recovery Center. [04:12] When our clients "don't even feel like using anymore." [08:19] Motivators and consequences for the addict. [11:17] Addicts saying they don't want to drink or drug anymore is usually a precursor to a future negative event. [14:07] Unicorn addicts who can successfully complete the program in 30 days. [18:15] Treatment and sober living can take up to a year to recover. [19:49] "I just want to move on and put 'this' behind me." [22:19] SMART goals and creating a new and healthy routine. [24:40] The difference between leaving and leaving when you are ready. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

"When I started coming to meetings, I actually saw freedom in people's faces, and in the way they spoke, they were just really happy! And I wanted that, you know? It gave me a whole new perspective." - Patricia Ben and I are chatting with Patricia today. She is a very successful member of our community. Patricia took our suggestions and acted on them to become sober. Consuming her first drink at 12, Patricia decided she liked the feeling of drinking, trying to escape her feelings. This process became a never-ending cycle, bringing fear into her life until she finally realized she couldn't live the life she was living. She had several factors that led up to her eventual sober recovery. With her third DUI and recently breaking up with her boyfriend, Patricia started binge drinking for weeks on end, then stopped. While binge drinking, she would pay for a motel, drink until she passed out, then wake up the next day and repeat the pattern again. She also held a job at a bloodwork lab during the day and worked 60+ hours per week. Part of her knew if this behavior continued that she would die. Patricia realized she needed a change and wanted to do whatever she could to get back on the right path. The first time she checked into treatment, she worked on her sobriety for a year-and-a-half. "I was stuck in a sort of a bubble, and I was so focused on my internship that I didn't have time for anything else. When I got out of that, it was very much a culture shock for me. I didn't have anything else to rely on besides my new husband, and life got very overwhelming for me, and I ended up in a motel room." She didn't have a clear path to fall back on when she was released from her prior treatment center and returned to drinking. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. Many times, we don't have to remove freedoms from our clients as they are going down the right path with guidance. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:35] Patricia is a star member of our sober community. [04:37] She tells of her story of spiraling downward into addiction. [06:04] Factors that led to her second attempt at treatment, including her third DUI. [08:40] What Patricia learned during her treatment at Rock Recovery Center. [10:40] How Patricia would deal with her previous life stressors running away. [13:53] Her daily schedule interning at her first treatment center. [16:50] Recovery happens outside of work, not inside of your workday. [19:45] Patricia realized that the choices she was going to make came down to her making the right decisions. [21:49] Treatment models that fail is because they do not give the opportunity to practice their new tools in treatment. [26:00] Providing the opportunity for yourself to do better. [27:28] Three suggestions given to Patricia to help her build a better life. [31:33] The challenges and reality of becoming sober. [34:48] Why rehab romance never works. [39:27] The pattern of romantic relationship development in rehab. [41:27] Thanks to Patricia for coming on the show. We are honored to witness her sobriety. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

"I have little brothers and sisters that currently don't have a dad so I feel like if I work on myself and get better for myself I can be a better role model and support for my family back home.' " - Mitchell Ben and I are chatting with Mitchell, who is 21 and has been in treatment five times because of his previous cocaine addiction. He started his addiction at 16, with college friends smoking weed mixed with cocaine. Then, he had two knee surgeries as a result of football injuries at age 17 and was hooked on Percocet. Not only was he addicted, but he also sold his prescription to other friends. He admits that early on, during his addiction, "I lost a lot of really good friends, and I lost a perfect girl at that time." Mitchell's mother was monitoring his medication and realized he was taking too many drugs and decided to stop giving him his medicine. At that time, Mitchell decided to go into treatment for juveniles at age 17 for one year. After his time in rehab, Mitchell returned home to live with his parents. He soon became, "caught in the wrong crowd, started fighting, stealing and not living the life that I should've been. It was really hard." At 19, he had to get another surgery, let his friends persuade him to take narcotic pain medications. From this point, he went back to cocaine, then switched to Xanax, and tried a multitude of other drugs. At 20, he went to detox again in Miami. Since then, he has been bouncing back and forth between centers without success until he came to Rock Recovery Center. He understands how peer pressure really pulls him down in a negative cycle. Mitchell knows he has to work on himself and have more self-control with his emotions. His family has a big part in gaining his sobriety. Dad is currently in prison, he loves his dad and feels that he has to help himself before he can help his dad. Even though his dad is in a tough situation, Mitchell understands that he needs to become clean so his dad won't be disappointed in him. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:58] Mitchell introduces himself and starts with his story of addiction at age 16. [06:20] How he played the healthcare system to get more opioid drugs. [09:34] What elements made Mitchell become unstable in recovery? [10:30] How he is influenced by females and why he wants to break this habit. [12:56] Ben talks about his experiences with previous relapses. [15:48] Pitfalls that have given Mitchell huge obstacles for his sobriety. [19:18] What things Mitchell can't go without during his sobriety. [21:45] Going to treatment to go back and contribute to your family's health. [25:03] Mitchell's plans and goals moving forward. [28:20] Mentors and people to look up to during treatment. [30:48] Priorities with relationships - make sure you are going in the right direction. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

"I remember looking in the bathroom mirror and saying to myself, 'You're an alcoholic because you are drinking just like your old man.' " -John S. Ben and I are chatting with John S., who is a "real alcoholic" in his words. We are going to talk to John about sponsorship, which he is very adamant about. Our group chat will also dive into the differences between privately run and not-for-profit run treatment centers. John is a "real alcoholic" who was born in New Orleans, which is the drinking city of the world, where you can purchase drive-through alcohol. His father was a "beer-drinking alcoholic who loved to fight." He was unfaithful to his wife and cheated when playing games. His parents divorced around age 5, as his dad was very abusive. He started drinking casually in high school and remembered that he was always the guy pushing the alcohol on everybody during high school games. During college, he joined a fraternity and continued to drink, however, he didn't finish college. Even with drinking full-time, he never received a DUI. In addition to drinking, he added cocaine to his addiction in the mid-'80s. Since he was a functioning alcoholic, John was able to land a good banking job, making good money. He purchased a home and a lovely car with his new salary. He was living the good life until he was rear-ended by a dump truck and wasn't able to work because of damage to his spine and his neck. Now at home full-time, he started drinking more during the day as he was home alone. Drinking was an escape for his pain and suffering from his accident and subsequent surgeries. He would hide his alcohol in different places within his home and drink straight from the bottles. John would drink a little bit from each bottle, however, his partner only knew of one bottle he was drinking, so he didn't understand how much he was drinking. His doctor and his therapist didn't think he was an alcoholic. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:38] John talks about his story, his path to alcoholism and his recovery. [07:05] He started drinking during his high school years. [08:56] John's mom remarried and moved, thinking that a geographical change would help her son. [10:23] His story of being rear-ended by a dump truck and the resulting effects. [13:36] John's friends who were in AA would try to get John to come to meetings. [15:54] The point at which his partner told him he needed to go to treatment. [18:30] His first night in a treatment center in Salt Lake City, UT. [22:24] Hiding bottles from himself, his partner and his family. [24:00] John started helping people the first day he was in recovery. [33:30] His take on relating to other people who were alcoholic, but not successful in life. [39:56] He talks about his "sponsees" in the program. [41:29] He and his person he has sponsored are total opposites but have a strong friendship. [46:19] John talks about his current living situation and sobriety. [51:51] Alcoholism as a progressive illness and relapse. [55:45] How desperation sets people apart. [58:44] John talks about how he came into Rock Recovery Center spiritually and morally bankrupt but came out the other end a whole person. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Benjamin and I will give you advice on how to overcome the three biggest challenges you may face when you are moving from a life of addiction to a life of sobriety. First, you have to establish new relationships with other sober people. Don't hang out with your old friends who are drinking or doing drugs. They will be a negative influence on your life and can drag you back down to return to being an active addict. You'll outgrow the addicts that used to be your "friends," recover your family relationships and build new positive habits in your life. Look at your relationships and review your connections with others. Find those who genuinely love you and care about your well-being and restore these relationships. Review the relationships with others who are your drinking buddies or your friends you did drugs with and do not continue those connections. Grow your network that contains people who are also recovering, people who will assist you in moving forward in your sobriety, and add those who are a part of your sobriety journey. Secondly, you have to establish a new lifestyle as the former lifestyle is not conducive to sobriety. You have many hours to fill without drugs and alcohol. Find positive activities you like to do, such as exercise, finding a new hobby, and finding a job you want to do. Fill your day with positive, fun activities instead of the negative influence of drugs. You can also relearn to love old activities while sober! Third, be careful not to get into the "groundhog's day" syndrome. Make goals that are time-sensitive, and plan your day around moving forward toward your goals. Do activities that help you achieve what you want out of life. Make sure to start your day out positive. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:15] Stopping your addiction is not easy, but you can recover and live a better life. [03:54] Establish new relationships with other sober people. [06:05] Build your life of recovery with spiritual growth and other positive habits. [10:34] You may want to restore relationships with others who stopped hanging out with you because of your addiction. [13:16] Establish a new lifestyle for your new life of recovery. [16:26] Why Ben hates running and he thinks it sucks, and why he does it every morning. [18:18] Find new activities you like to do through your new sober connections. [20:29] What can you do to deal with the boredom? [24:04] The Triangle Club meets at 7am for those who are dedicated to getting their lives back together before they go off to work. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Benjamin and I will give you advice on the questions you should ask and how you can research recovery and addiction centers. There are seven key questions or points you should discuss when you are looking for a center. #1 Confirm that the person who answers the phone actually works at the facility and isn't a hotline operator. Make sure you are speaking to someone at the center, not an answering service. A team member can give you a better idea of what is going on at their treatment center and details about daily living and structure. When someone calls Rock Recovery Center, Ben and I see you, sit in on meetings, and follow-through with your recovery. #2 Seek an organization that provides a list of full-time healthcare and addiction facility team members, along with their credentials. Find out the client-to-staff ratio in the system that you are looking to go to or place your loved one. Ask about the longevity of the staff and the turnover rate. #3 Check with state and federal agencies to see if complaints have been filed with the center or its staff members. Look for places that are licensed through your local children and families, Joint Commission, or other reputable organizations. Look at Google reviews, but read the reviews, don't just look at star ratings. See what people are saying about the center. #4 Do not use a facility that offers perks such as free flights, rent, food, cash, drugs, or other open items in exchange for joining their program. This is an illegal offering from the facility or a client / patient broker. #5 Look for a facility that is associated with a medical institution, depending on what state you are looking for treatment. Some states, like Florida, have better small care treatment facilities. Ask about caseload to doctor ratio - make sure the large facility doesn't have a large client to doctor or therapist ratio. More than eight to 12 clients per therapist aren't going to give your loved one good care. Also, ask about staff turnover. #6 Abstinence, for long-term, is, in our opinion, the best form of treatment. We have had clients tell us their drug of choice and don't consider themselves to be sober when they are on "treatment drugs." Clients who have been on Suboxone can get hooked on this for years and are very sick when they get off their secondary drugs. Some centers will not take addicts who are on these drugs. #7 Check for accreditation for the facility you are looking into for your loved one. Review that facilities are doing activities to improve their standards. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:56] #1 Confirm that the person who answers the phone actually works at the facility and isn't a hotline operator. [11:15] Ben does his best to personally greet clients when they arrive at Rock Recovery Center. [12:10] #2 Seek an organization who provides a list of full-time healthcare and addiction facility team members, along with their credentials. [17:16] Read Google reviews to see what others are saying about the facility. [19:30] #4 Do not use a facility that offers perks such as free flights, rent, food, cash or other free items in exchange for joining their program. [22:16] Avoid places that are involved in illegal activity, they cannot be trusted. [25:10] Be wary of treatment centers that first ask you what type of insurance you have. [30:13] Ask about case load to doctor ratio - make sure the large facility doesn't have a large client to doctor ratio. [33:09] Our discussion about using drugs to get off of addiction. [36:36] Ben talks about our success rate at Rock Recovery Center and the benefits of abstinence based therapy. [40:54] You can't relapse if you're not sober. Suboxone and other drugs are more addicting than the illegal drugs people are trying to get off of. [45:40] Ben and I discuss the checkboxes for staying accredited. [47:39] Give us a call or email us with questions! Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

"In every single way, my sobriety has become a blessing for me." -Sean, Rock Recovery Center I have a guest today, Sean, who is from Long Island, New York. He came to our recovery center eight years ago for thirty days and decided to become a resident of Florida. We talk about Sean's stage character, how he dropped his walls, and his process of recovery. Two days before he came to Rock Recovery Center, Sean remembers "almost drinking myself to death. Everything was dark in my life. I didn't see a way out, and 99% of my thinking had to involve some sort of alcohol. I was losing my health, my wife and children, borderline diabetes with more than 120 pounds extra weight." He was Baker Acted after police came to his house because they received a call and thought he was going to hurt himself. When he returned from the hospital, he talked with his wife. In this conversation, he was yelling at her, then had a moment of clarity. The next day, he told his wife he needed help. Although he realized he needed help, he was adamant about not participating in a 12 Step Program as he didn't think it would work for him. When Sean landed in Florida for his first day of recovery, he felt he would erase over two decades of drinking in 29 days. In his first AA meeting, he didn't let any of the conversations in his head. He was 100% sure that this program wouldn't work for him. He created a calendar with 29 days to cross off until he went home. At the time he had six "x" marks on his calendar, he understood the fellowship of AA. "The lower your bottom, the higher your hope." He heard others who had much worse situations with addiction tell their stories of hope. "They were talking about how wonderful and amazing their lives were. If they could do it, I could do it! That little mustard seed of hope, that little bit of open-mindedness cracked open. Once it cracked open, it was off to the races." Listen in to find out how Sean realized he had a problem with alcohol, why he owes a debt of gratitude to the friend who told his wife details about his alcoholism, and why he thought he could "think his way through this" because of his education as a health coach. Learn how Sean views his recovery process today, how he came to the realization that he had to let the program process "in," and why prayer has made a significant difference in his life. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:34] Sean's story of how and why he came to Rock Recovery Center. [07:34] What woke Sean up to his reality was a "look" he got from his then wife. [09:29] His first day of recovery at Rock Recovery Center. [11:33] Ben talks about his witness with Sean's process. [13:30] Sean says, "I was without a doubt, a polished up garbage can." [18:18] He saw the pain and sadness in his wife's eyes. [20:55] The key people in his life that influenced Sean to go to recovery. [22:55] For twenty years he tried to break the cycle of alcoholism on his own. [24:32] What factors changed Sean to stop drinking and how he views his recovery process today. [25:33] The day he decided to start praying, he has prayed everyday since and hasn't missed a day. [27:06] His experience in outpatient treatment after his inpatient time at the recovery center. [33:23] When Sean realized his new "normal" in his life. [37:27] How the community we build around us will directly affect your level of success. [41:10] Sean getting in with the "old timers" who had been sober for many years. [45:08] His old company rehires him and he was able to stay away from alcohol on the job and how his sobriety has made him stronger. [48:58] "There's a lot of respect for my sobriety" with people who drink. [51:14] His post recovery relationship with his children and his family. [53:42] How he recovered his relationship with his sister. [55:43] "You never know what meeting is going to change your life." Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Set some friggin boundaries please www.realrecoverytalk.com [email protected] [email protected] I can't tell you how many phone calls I get from parents that don't know what to do with her addict son or daughter, a good place to start is setting some boundaries. Having a loved one with addiction problems can be a very stressful situation. Often times we try and navigate this path on our own and think that we know what's best for our loved one. When we can understand that we do not know what's best for them and we can finally reach out for help is when the real healing starts to happen. There are many situations in which we can handle addiction and it can be different for everybody given different circumstances. Most importantly we need to be able to ask for help and recognize that we don't know what's best and be OK with that

I have a guest today, Maggie, from Pittsburgh, who has come forward to share her story with us. This is the third time she has been in recovery from alcoholism and is going to tell her story of her past, her present, and where she plans on taking her life in the future. Maggie is in our program at Rock Recovery Center. She is 25 years old and started drinking 13 years ago as a result of trying to keep up with her two older brothers. The crack head down the street would go and buy them alcohol in exchange for watching her child when she was gone. Since their parents were out working a lot, her friends and her brothers' friends would come over to their house and party after school in their backyard pool. They would clean up their mess and then go to a park or another location to continue to party. She started high school at a Catholic High School, failed 9th grade. Her parents moved to a better area of Pennsylvania, and she was in a new school that was bigger than her old school. In the IMPACT program and not knowing any students in her new school, Maggie gravitated towards the "druggie kids" as they were her classmates. Maggie started doing several different types of drugs when she started going to RAVE clubs. She then got into a car accident, flew through the windshield, and was hospitalized with reconstructive surgery to her face. After high school, she became a bartender and started doing cocaine and Adderall to keep going throughout the day. She was hardly sleeping and felt that she was cool because she was only 18 but was able to be at the bar all day and night. At 21, she was drinking all night and ended up in a stranger's bed. Her friends were concerned with her safety. She realized at this point that she had a problem. Listen in to find out why she mixed Adderall, cocaine, and alcohol to get through her day, how she had blackouts and would sleep with strangers, and why she always had to drink alcohol, even while studying for college. Learn how Maggie broke down and finally called a rehab, how she had an affair with a male married nurse at another facility, and what led to Maggie's relapse after her first rehab. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:22] Maggie shares her story of her past and how she became alcoholic. [07:47] Her Catholic high school and her friend groups in school. [09:59] She started drinking and smoking weed at 12 years of age. [11:54] How Maggie started going to RAVE clubs and doing drugs. [15:02] Her parents were in denial of the situation. [19:17] Maggie, at age 21, would end up drinking and ending up in a stranger's bed. [22:40] She decided to go to school full-time as a paralegal. [24:58] Her transition from bartender to full-time paralegal. [26:56] The first time Maggie sought treatment and her experience. [31:34] Maggie's first sponsor for her first outpatient. [34:47] Her bouts with depression, how she felt unsettled again. [38:23] How Maggie came to Real Rock Recovery Center. [42:49] Differences between her home rehab and Florida rehab. [47:05] What Maggie thinks about her new sober lifestyle. [49:47] How Maggie sees her new future in Florida. [52:01] Why working for her sobriety makes a significant difference in her recovery. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Ben and I have two guests today who are sharing their experience with their current recovery experience concerning their past recovery experiences. We will talk to Dakota and Chris about what had impacted them from when they started their sobriety journey to where their journey is taking them in the future. My guests will also talk about how their hard work has paid off, and benefits sobriety has brought to their lives. Dakota was addicted to heroin and has been sober for a year at the end of May. Chris is 21 years old, has been to nine treatment centers. His addiction was cocaine, and he has been sober for eight months. Both men have been to multiple treatment centers to achieve sobriety. Dakota woke up one day at age 19 and didn't want to live anymore. "That feeling that I had inside that I didn't want to live anymore is the worst bottom I've ever had." Originally going to treatment to get off opiates, Dakota still planned on drinking and smoking marijuana. He watched his situation worsen over time. "I had to get beaten down so bad that I became willing to do whatever it took to stay sober off everything." He didn't understand the steps he had to take to get sober. After several years of treatment, Dakota realized that he would have to go entirely off all drugs to be successful in his treatment. Chris has been through three previous treatment centers and is 30 years of age. A drug user since the age of 15, with the most substantial amount of clean time at seven months, much of that time being spent in jail. He pushed everyone out of his life as he only wanted to be with drugs and alcohol. "I basically messed up my life so bad, I lost about everything, I was barely holding on to a job." In 2018 he decided that drugs and alcohol were a problem. He felt bankrupt not only financially but emotionally and spiritually. In his first attempt at Rock Recovery, he relapsed after 45 days, drank for three days straight. This confirmed to Chris his problem with alcoholism. Listen in to find out how being alcoholic can become a habit, why Chris felt his alcoholism was on auto-pilot, why having positive habits is a vital ingredient to sobriety. Learn why addicts can't just stop doing drugs and alcohol, the struggles Chris and Dakota have faced in their recovery and how hard both clients have had to fight to become sober. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:32] Dakota shares his previous treatment center experiences. [07:20] See link below to hear Dakota's entire story on episode 80. [11:40] Chris talks about his addiction and relapse experience. [14:06] He decides he is an alcoholic after a three-day relapse spent drinking. [16:18] Chris didn't know what to do when he was done work, so he chose to drink. [17:47] Find out why addicts can't "just stop doing drugs and alcohol". [21:37] Advice Dakota gives to others who are starting their journey to sobriety. [25:27] How he has gotten through rough times, especially with COVID-19 [26:30] How Chris' situation is different for him now that he is sober. [27:48] Why having a sober support community has impacted both clients' sobriety. [29:24] Helping other addicts helps those with addiction stay sober. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Listen to Dakota tell his story in Episode 80

Ben and I have a guest with us today who is a patient at Rock Recovery Center. Mathew K, our special guest, shares his history and experience with recovery from alcohol addiction. Matt has been in several different types of treatment several times over the past five years. We discuss Matt's past wins, mistakes, and his past history related to his addiction. Currently, in his mid-30's, he started drinking at age 14 and his first use of drugs at age 15. His earliest childhood memories at the age of five were of a work-oriented father who wasn't present and gave Matt constant negative feedback and a mother who was giving. Several times his father would come home drunk and have arguments with his mom, which is the reason Matt remembers feelings of being protective of his mother. He played several sports and remembered his grandparents watching his games. School was a safe place for Matt as he was an outstanding athlete and received good grades, until his junior year in high school. When drinking, Matt felt that he was free, and his state of being drunk made the world feel like it was slowing down. His alcoholism progressed with his junior and senior years when he quit sports, found a job, and bought a car. Additionally, he was friends with many of the cheerleaders and sports jocks who liked to throw parties. Known as "the party guy," he held parties on his property as his parents had a large property with land, which he would host parties on frequently. By the time he was out of high school, he had identified with being the bartender. He would boast he could "drink like his dad." Like a badge of honor, this was a sense of accomplishment and entrance into manhood. He was continually trying to "one-up" himself drinking. He realized at the age of 25 that he had become an alcoholic. Even though his friends pointed out he had become alcoholic, he would respond with "alcoholics go to meetings." About four years ago, he had to time out how often he needed to drink so he wouldn't get the shakes. Matt avoided drinking during his workday as a pizza delivery associate because he didn't want to be drunk and kill someone drunk driving. His drinking, bad eating habits, and smoking ended him up in the hospital with pancreatitis at the age of 30. Since then, he has been hospitalized 15 times for pancreatitis. His liver and pancreas are so weakened that he will die from pancreatitis or liver shutdown if he continues to drink. Listen in to find out when Matt sought out treatment for alcoholism, his residential rehab experiences, and the different programs he went through during the past five years. Learn why he couldn't stand to be in his first treatment program, and what his criteria are for being successful at a rehabilitation clinic. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:34] Matt shares his history of addiction with Ben and I. [09:32] How Matt reacted and dealt with his dad's drinking at a very young age. [11:44] Alcoholism paving the way for Matt to have trauma related to his dad's drinking. [13:06] Neurological aspects of alcohol addiction. [14:18] Matt's first experience getting drunk involved eating pizza with cigarettes on top. [18:34] His road to alcoholism starting in his junior year of high school. [19:33] When Matt did eight shots twice, then kept drinking and blacked out in the snow. [23:14] Upholding drinking as a badge of honor, this was a sense of accomplishment and entrance into manhood. [24:15] When Matt realized he had become an alcoholic. [26:30] The reason he went into treatment was because he had pancreatitis. [29:41] Why Matt has been hospitalized 15 times in five years. [32:01] Matt's attempt at drinking with attempted moderation after being diagnosed and told he would die if he continued to drink. [35:24] Ben's professional opinion on 30 days of treatment for addiction. [40:20] Why Matt had to fall flat multiple times to keep himself in treatment. [41:30] Matt's criteria for a rehabilitation clinic. [46:09] The importance of a geographical change when getting sober. [50:27] This is the longest period since his teens that Matt has been sober. [52:44] Ben discusses the positive aspects of recovery far away from home. [55:12] Sobriety support in the "Recovery Capital of the World". [58:16] Taking pride in your sobriety. [61:13] Drivers for addicts to become sober. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brene Brown and Vulnerability Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Ben and I both share the same birthday - April 7th, 1984, with Ben just a few hours older than me! COVID update from South Florida, as we are starting to get to the height of the Coronavirus. Professionals are currently predicting April 16th as the peak time for COVID in Florida. We are continuing our support for our clients with changes as necessary to prevent the spread of Coronavirus. We are both predicting addiction rates increasing because of the economic downturn and lack of work available. Social media news outlets are influencing people around the world. I believe that we are going to look at how much we depend on the media after COVID passes. Returning Home Post Treatment "Set yourself up for success where you are at today, not where you think you're going to be tomorrow." Ben Rock Recovery Center Your loved one may have returned home from treatment. Especially during the outbreak, people are stressed and can easily fall back into relapse. Make sure to encourage your loved one or yourself to call for help when you feel you need assistance before you are in dire straits. Prevent yourself from getting into an old negative pattern you don't want to experience again in your life. No matter where you go for treatment, you will most likely take more than one attempt to recover. This does not mean you can't recover in one attempt. To improve in one attempt, "all the seeds need to plant and grow." While Ben needed multiple attempts to recover, I was able to be clean after one treatment, however; I was able to make all the seeds grow. Mainly to learn to cope with the underlying issues which pushed me into using drugs and alcohol. Listen in to find out Ben's experience with multiple times trying to recover from addiction, why people don't want to identify as a drug addict, and why people are not aware of challenges when they get back home after recovery. Learn why you will fail 100% of the time if you are not into the treatment process and learn the components to make your recovery work. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:05] South Florida COVID update and peak time prediction. [05:50] How social media is influencing people around the world. [08:49] Pick up the phone and reach out for support when you need to without guilt. [10:02] Ben's experiences post-treatment with several tries detoxing. [11:21] My experience with treatment and why I could successfully treat one time. [13:04] Why people don't want to identify as a current or past addict. [16:05] Spouse and marriages, addiction and divorce. [17:35] Why you should do as much as possible during treatment. [20:30] Ben's favorite recovery quote. [23:30] Focusing and understanding that recovery is up to the individual and learning from failure. [26:31] What happens when people come back to recovery the second time. [30:24] Negative habits of drug addiction, please take the initiative and call and reach out for assistance! Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brene Brown and Vulnerability Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are, chatting outside in the beautiful Florida weather, with Real Recovery Talk! COVID-19 has affected so many aspects of our lives, including how Ben and I record our podcasts. We are doing our best to provide recovery at Rock Recovery Center, along with abiding by all state, federal, and local guidelines regarding patient care and the COVID virus. Many people are struggling with the decision to put their loved one on a plane to send them to recovery. They are worried their family member could contract COVID. What many people don't realize is that if you have a family member who is addicted to drugs, the drugs are more likely to kill them than the COVID virus in many cases. Waiting one day too many to send your loved one to recovery could be the difference between survival and death. Drug addicts use drugs and alcohol to cope with stressful situations, especially in cases like we are seeing recently. We believe that the use of drugs and alcohol during recent weeks is continuing to escalate because we are in a stressful environment. We believe that many addicts are being cut off from their addiction source, starting to go through withdrawal and deciding to come to treatment. Additionally, there are over 14,000 methadone patients in New York who cannot currently get their methadone treatment. MAT programs can have many downfalls, the lack of medication in situations such as we are going through at the moment is just one of the downfalls of MAT programs. Listen in to find out Ben's experience with methadone treatment, methadone's horrible physical and mental withdrawal symptoms, and why we practice abstinence-based recovery and treatment. Find out why you can still look at the positive side of our current situation, why you can take this time to better yourself and your life and what you can do now to ensure you come out better when this situation is over. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [02:39] How COVID is affecting our podcast, our lives and our recovery center. [03:50] Modifications in client care as a result of protection against Coronavirus. [05:49] Waiting one more day to send your loved one to recovery can be the difference between survival and death. [08:43] How many of the recovery and addiction groups in South Florida have adapted their meetings because of the COVID outbreak. [12:21] The lack of methadone treatment in New York and throughout the country. [15:35] Negative effects and downfalls of the MAT program. [17:55] Charlie's experience with the methadone when he was in recovery. [22:35] Steps Ben and I are taking in our long-term sobriety to continue to be sober. [26:30] Ben's pros and cons of the current situation. [29:02] Activities you can still take part in, even if your gym is closed. [30:12] COVID-19 is not a reason to not give your loved ones a chance at recovery. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brene Brown and Vulnerability Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben and I are driving and podcasting at the same time today, we are here having our car chat and recording this episode. Have you considered an addict that you need to be managed? This is a hard proposition to accept, as we want to feel in control of our lives. Much of the management is in the context of timelines and includes goals. Ultimately, you and your mentor wish to get to the same place in your recovery; however, the path you choose may not be your best option. Let your mentor or another professional help you choose the best path to your goal. Managing your case involves setting expectations, not dictating our client's every move. We want you to have the freedom and move forward in your healing process. Your case consists of the consideration of your input and discussion with a professional at our center. We will give you the reasons why individual decisions and input are positive or why we think a particular choice is not in your best interest. One case we focus on in this episode is a client who has been in recovery seven times. When asked why he had been in recovery seven times, he replied: "Well, because I have felt it's my duty to get back to my mom who is struggling and having a hard time making ends meet." Allowing our new client to be a part of the process and listening to his input, we can better serve him and refocus his journey to be successful. A second case example is a woman who is in our program. She wanted a pass to hang out with her new boyfriend, who lives close to the center before she started treatment. Trust has not been earned yet, as this relationship has not been developed. Both parties must spend time together to learn to trust the relationship. Listen in to find out why you should have an upfront contract when you start your recovery, what having input into your treatment looks like and sounds like in a conversation and why reconsidering to do an activity at a later time is essential to your full recovery. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [02:54] Who needs to be managed and what does that mean? [05:07] A case example of a client who doesn't want to be managed. [07:15] The importance of validating expectations. [09:07] Building a treatment plan around the client's input and perspective. [10:40] Why one of our clients has been in recovery seven times. [12:23] Intensive outpatient and how this part of recovery can support you and keep you on the right track. [13:54] The importance of having an upfront contract when you begin recovery. [16:41] Trust is tested to the max in the treatment process as the client needs to give some of their freedoms to create a successful recovery. [18:17] Best mindsets for people to have as a client and family of a client. [20:22] Expectations of clients depending on previous experience. [22:41] Understand when you seek out a treatment facility that certain aspects of your life will be managed. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brene Brown and Vulnerability Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Let's find out what the five stages of change are and how you could be enabling your loved one to stay addicted to drugs and alcohol. Addicts can transfer from one stage to another daily. There are many different factors in the addict's life, which will play into what stage the addict is currently experiencing. This episode is not only for those who are addicted but for the loved ones, friends, and family who have a role in the addict's life. Stage #1: Precontemplation Stage The addict is clueless about their behavior, how their behavior affects others around them and is perplexed about why the people around them are responding to them in the manner in which they see. The addict does not even register that they have an issue and will usually give excuses about their behavior or think their behavior is in the normal range of socially acceptable behavior. Stage #2: Contemplation Stage The addicts look at their behavior and think their possibly could be a problem with their behavior. They may see room for change. However, they aren't ready to make that change at this stage. The addict can start to see a daily pattern in their addiction. The person isn't convinced they have a problem when they are going through this stage. Stage #3: Understanding the Problem For drug addicts and alcoholics to get to this stage can take multiple years of the same destructive behavior day after day to recognize that this behavior is a problem. They realize their tolerance to drugs, alcohol has increased, and their problem is affecting their work and family life. Poor habits such as not eating, not sleeping, or not bathing are regular daily choices. Health is on the decline, and they understand this behavior is negatively affecting them. At this stage, they know they have a problem and see the evidence of their behavior. Stage #4: Action Stage At this stage, the addict realizes they have an issue and start to make changes. They may realize they need to check themselves into treatment or start to attend a support group. At this point, the addict needs support, as this stage takes a large amount of willpower. The addict will start to understand the reason behind their addiction. Next, they can attend therapy to work through the healing process. For the family member, you now have the opportunity to learn about addiction and how to properly support your child or family member in their newfound recovery. Stage #5: Maintenance Stage Find support groups, mentors, and others who will positively support you and your family. This stage can last for years and does not have a specific stopping point in your life. You may find a therapist who you trust and rely on to help you through your healing journey. Listen in to find out why you need to draw boundaries around addicts and how boundaries can move the addict through to the fourth and fifth stages of recovery. Find out why it's so important to learn about addiction and why you should find others who are in a similar position to you to learn from them what to expect and how you can support your child or loved one. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:33] Addictive habits including eating, power-lifting, drugs and alcohol. [06:38] Stage #1, the Precontemplation stage explained. [07:55] Stage #2, Contemplation stage and the behavior of the addict in this stage. [10:10] Stage #3, Understanding the problem and how the addict comes to this point. [13:50] Addicts can move through one or more of these stages on the same day. [16:13] Ways parents, friends and family members enable drug and alcohol addicts. [18:28] How enabling addicts to be able to function is negatively impacting their route to recovery. [20:10] Stage #4, the Action Stage where the behavior change starts. [24:04] Learn how you can support your loved one through their Action Stage. [25:07] Stage #5, the Maintenance Stage will last for a long time and usually involve support groups and mentors. [26:37] The Relapse Stage and why people relapse back into addictive behavior. [29:37] Contact us with questions or comments if you or a loved one need help! Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben is hosting our show today with our guest Johnny, a recovered alcoholic and drug addict and part of the team at Futures Recovery Health Care in Jupiter, Florida. Johnny grew up in a financially stable household and was a very privileged child, attended prep school, and expected people to always tell him he was brilliant. He graduated from college and landed a great job in Washington DC, making great money for his age at 21. He soon fell into cocaine addiction and was the life of the party until this came to an end when he became homeless. He found himself out on the streets in Phoenix, Arizona. Johnny liked hanging out with people who were making fun of others because "we were better than them." Out of control and in with the wrong crowd, "I realized I violated every type of value I had: physical, emotional, and sexual." His life became a catch 22 of doing anything for money to get drugs, then needing to take drugs to forget about the action he had just received. This series of recurring events took Johnny to a place "where I had no hope." His distorted perception of body dysmorphia, along with the belief his parents instilled in having to be the best at both being an athlete and student, led him to have unrealistic standards for himself. Now, Johnny always needed to feel connected to a group. Looking back, he realized how much of a puppet he had become. By August 16th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers and didn't realize how much he was hurting his family, as well as himself. Johnny decidedly made a choice to not put a mind-altering substance in his body again. Listen in to find out Johnny's struggles with God, how he reconnected to God, and how Johnny continued to lie and struggle before he found a sponsor. Find out how his past actions when he was addicted caught up to him in the form of federal prison several years later. Learn how Johnny used this opportunity for 35 months to help other prisoners become sober and straight. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [01:28] Johnny tells his story of how he fell into addiction. [05:06] You can't outthink drug and alcohol addiction once addiction gets a hold of you. [05:28] Johnny talks about the void which drugs and alcohol filled for him. [08:14] August 15th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers [09:53] Johnny and his belief and disbelief in God. [11:35] Taking a look at sobriety and abstinence. [13:02] Johnny's past catching up with him five years after his actions. [16:48] Looking at the impact of drug and alcohol abuse on family and others around you. [17:57] Patrick, a counselor in Lima, PA, helped Johnny unload his fears and move through the process of healing. [19:30] Brene Brown and the courage to be vulnerable. [21:29] Sharing and the role of sharing in the process of healing and relations theory. [23:00] Three types of recovery programs at Futures Recovery Healthcare Center. [27:40] Working with people who cannot show weakness. [31:02] The experiential process, hands on, working with recovering addicts one-on-one. [34:30] Johnny's daily thinking process and mindset as he moves through daily life. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brene Brown and Vulnerability Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben is with me today, and we are going to talk about what you can expect from day 31 on when you are a recovering addict. The first thirty days are all about detox and living in a safe environment. The next phase for patients is intensive outpatient treatment. You can easily underestimate how well you will do after 30 days and may want to skip this phase, however, many who do jump the second 30 days of outpatient treatment usually end up using again. When you decide to recover from drug and alcohol use, make a promise to yourself to see your recovery past 30 days. You may want to get back to your regular life; however, there are many environments that you may not be strong enough to withstand, and you can quickly end up relapsing without enough support. The stronger you are, the better husband, wife, daughter, son, brother, and sister you will be. You have the choice to be a better you, and only you can create the change which will make this happen. Remember, your drug addiction may have been with you for years, and the trauma which led you to your addiction may have also lasted many years. You cannot heal from multiple years of engrained trauma and abuse in only 30 days. Take the time to put in 100% for yourself from the start of your recovery. On days 30 to 120, you'll be a part of PHP and IOP programs. Generally, you'll spend about 30 days in the PHP of the recovery program. At this point, you'll be assigned a therapist and start digging into the source of your addiction. You may be going to a supermarket with a group and learn to navigate through the aisles without buying alcohol. This is a useful program as you're spending approximately 25 hours of clinical therapy per week to have the support necessary to move through the healing process. IOP can last 120 days past your initial start of recovery. You'll be able to give the treatment team a good perspective of where you are for the team to be able to identify where you'll need support and what emotional factors you'll need to work on in your recovery. Listen in to find out why you will gain more and be more successful when you see your therapy through the past 30 days, why a drug or alcohol addict's behavior is worse when they are not using drugs or alcohol for the first time, and how you can replace drugs and alcohol with other risky behaviors. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:43] Let's move into today's show with a profile scenario. [09:01] It's very easy to underestimate the amount of control you have over your addiction during the first thirty days of treatment. [11:49] Ben and I discuss the details of intensive PHP therapy. [13:29] The purpose of PHP is to figure out what the underlying conditions are which caused your addiction. [15:15] Ben and I talk about why we became addicts, our emotional triggers and what we had to work through to become clean again. [20:28] Why an addict's behavior is worse for the first few days or weeks after they become clean of drugs or alcohol. [22:08] When you are addicted to drugs or alcohol, you need to find a positive behavior to replace the old behavior. [25:10] The most important part of recovery is the transitional level of care. [29:28] Staying in your program until you have dealt with your emotional hurt is the best way to receive the support you need when recovering from addiction. [31:18] Getting your life back on track and how your sponsor can be an important support in this process. [34:17] Be willing, open and honest when moving through recovery. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

5 Min or Less Original Song by Ben B! Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk Original song with a message for today! Everyone experiences pain. Whether it be addiction, trauma, mental health, or the like. These are just a few examples. My question to you is, what are you gonna do with that pain? Are you going to turn it into a strength? Are you gonna let it fuel your eternal fire to have a better life? Are you able to turn your liabilities into assets? I encourage you to use your pain to grow. I encourage you to use your pain to help others. I encourage you to share your successes!

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Do you know someone who is considering going to a treatment facility for up to 30 days? Today, I'm going to talk about how you most likely won't be cured by going to treatment for 30 days. There are a few people who have been successful after just 30 days; however, they are few and far between. The first day of treatment consists of detox, which generally ranges from day one to day seven. Detox can vary from one to fourteen days, depending on the individual and specific variables. Variables that can affect the length of detox are the types of drugs you are using, how long you are using drugs, the vehicle of use of drugs. For example, are you using drugs IV, orally? Similar variables apply to alcohol, with some additional factors such as drinking alone or with others. A detox facility is a safe place where you can get meals, medical attention, and be in a safe environment when you detox. During this time, your body will start to repair the damage inflicted by drugs and alcohol. From this point, you can now transfer to a residential facility where you will be day and night for treatment. You may have a behavioral technician keeping tabs on you every 15 minutes when you join the residential treatment program. This part of the team makes sure everyone is safe and comfortable. They also ensure that you are getting to your programs, meetings, and medical appointments on time. This period is known as a "drying out period." Therapy is still minimal, as you are usually not yet ready to start treatment. At this stage, you're detoxed and are moving toward creating a support group, getting to know your peers, and your therapist. Next, you'll need to figure out your personal triggers. What are your triggers? Are there specific environments in which your triggers are set off? Have you developed tools in your toolbox to deal with these triggers and to keep your calm in anxious situations? Have you considered your role or your family dynamics when dealing with triggers and healing from addiction? Listen in to find out why the first thirty days of recovery only scratch the surface. Understand why recovery is a process in which each individual needs to move through at their own pace. Learn why you'll need to continue healing and be consistent to work through previous trauma and have a successful recovery. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:48] What the first seven days of treatment will most likely be for an addict in recovery. [06:05] Variables which affect the length and severity of detox. [09:28] The next phase of your healing: moving to a residential facility. [12:24] You may have spent multiple years becoming an addict, you will most likely spend months if not years to recover to the point of not falling back to your addiction. [14:41] Have you identified your triggers? If so, what are coping skills you are using to calm your reaction to your triggers? [16:48] An example of what shouldn't happen when you come in for recovery. [19:42] We work with clients for three to four months on a continual basis to continue their recovery process. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

5 Min or Less Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk Just want to say thank you! Tom and I just wanted to take a moment to thank everybody for allowing us to be a part of their recovery. In this segment we discussed a few phone calls that we received in the past weeks from clients who are doing exceptionally well. They reported getting their families back, buying a house, attaining a career, and most importantly finding internal peace. Not to mention all the medallions we hear about being picked up. Getting to be a part of the journey of others obtaining sobriety is one of the gifts of doing what we do. There is nothing better than seeing others hit milestones and landmarks. We are GRATEFUL!!!

5 Min or Less Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk When we only have very little sober time, we should hang with people that have more sober time than us! When we have a few years sober, we should hang with people that have very little sober time! The idea behind this is when we are young and sobriety we need to be surrounded by wisdom. Often times people with wisdom have multiple years sobriety. As we mature in our sobriety we need to hang with people that need our wisdom, we are called to help them as we were helped when we were young in sobriety. When we have multiple years of sobriety, we too need to hang with people that have the same amount of time as us, if not more. We always want to be able to talk about our situations with other people and get advice and wisdom from others!

5 Min or Less Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk I love you man! In this excerpt, I discuss the importance of brotherly love in recovery. It is not weak to tell another man you love him. Many of us were raised to think that we have to be big, strong, tough and brutal. When we recover we find that we have to be inspirational leaders and caring protectors. That is what defines a man!!!

5 Min or Less No need for a romantic relationship at this time! Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes \Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk There is a reason why people suggest to not get into a relationship when establishing a foundation of sobriety. When we get sober we need to focus on nothing but ourselves. Getting into a relationship means that we are taking away from ourselves and putting it into another person. This could be for many reasons, but the most likely reason is because that other person makes us feel good. When we are with this other person we feel good, when we have sex with this person we feel good, when we are on the phone with this person we feel good, when we are texting with this person we feel good. All in all, this person being in our lives make us feel good. It is easy for us to not focus on ourselves and to focus on the relationship. The question is, what do we do if and when this relationship goes astray. I see a lot of times people meet their "soulmate" in detox and think that they are meant for one another. This can't be further from the truth. Do yourself a favor don't get into any relationships until you know the time is right and the people around you know the time is right. This

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Have you or someone you loved relapsed back into drug and alcohol addiction? Today, I'm going to talk about five different types of mindsets, which can lead to relapse. If you notice yourself or your loved one in one of these mindsets, make sure to reach out and get support and help - avoid the relapse cycle! The first mindset to watch out for is complacency. We hear about this all the time in rehab. Complacency is the thought process that leads us to believe we don't need to do much else to move forward. During the early stages of rehab, we get many of the things back that we lost, and then we can become complacent because we are now "OK." Many people will stop going to meetings as regularly as they used to. Sometimes we even see our sponsors less, or we don't return their calls. Whatever the case, stay diligent in your treatment and follow through with your responsibilities to have a successful rehab. One solution is to challenge yourself in an activity you enjoy, experience a new experience, and allow yourself to move forward in different areas of your life. The second mistake you can make is overconfidence. Don't take your sobriety lightly. The "I've got this" mentality is when you feel you don't need to go to meetings, volunteer, and see your mentor. Many of these people will be very defensive when their overconfidence is questioned. They feel that there is nothing that can come in between them and their sobriety. The third mindset which can trap you is hanging out with old friends, people, places, and things. To get sober, you must develop a sober support network of others around you who are solemn and involve themselves in dry activities. The fourth way to fall back into addiction is comparing yourself to others. I see this with people who are new to recovery. When you set the bar too high, especially in the beginning, you'll see people comparing themselves to others who have been sober for a long time. As a result, they view their recovery activities as holding them back from getting what they want out of life. A fifth mindset to avoid: Listen in to find out why you want to follow through with your recovery, be persistent, and have a positive attitude, which is essential to your recovery. Slow, consistent progress is critical to recovering fully from your addiction. Make sure to slow down and take enough time (more than 30 days) to move through the process of healing. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [02:00] Relapse starts before we re-engage with drugs and alcohol. [03:05] How you can connect with us on social media and our website. [04:05] Complacency and how this mindset can sneak into your life. [07:20] When you find that you're being complacent, find an activity to challenge yourself! [08:33] Sobriety can lead to overconfidence, make sure you avoid this pitfall. [10:51] Make sure you're not hanging out with old friends who are a negative influence on you. [13:53] Comparing yourself to others is not a positive mindset to have at any time, especially when you are becoming sober. [17:20] Don't be an "Eeyore" and have a cloud of doom above your head all day! [20:37] Most people have a combination of one or more of the above mindsets. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brad Jensen | Key Nutrition Coach

5 Min or Less Prioritizing time when getting sober Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk When getting sober we find that we are likely unemployed, lacking any meaningful relationships with family or loved ones due to our addiction, and have a lot of extra time on our hands. The question is, what do we do with all of this time? 🤷🏻‍♂️ Well, if you are in a detox or inpatient type program then there really isn't much to do outside of what the program tells you to do. But if you are in some sort of outpatient program or living on your own then you may find you have a lot of extra time that you need to fill. If we don't take the action steps necessary to fill this time with productive tasks or things to do then we could find ourselves spending a lot of time in our heads, which is not a good place for us to be. 😖 It goes without saying that we will need to find employment at some point in time. So go out and find a job, this cannot wait. Also, as newly sober people we need to rely on sober friends and sober support networks. These are things that we can work on as well. Find new friends, spend time with them. Do productive things that will help you progress life. Whatever it is that you find yourself doing make sure you have balance. Don't put all of your eggs in one basket. Balance is key, with everything. Exercise and fitness is very important but that doesn't mean spend five hours a day in the gym and another five hours researching the latest fad diet and fitness programs. Go to the gym, get a good workout in, leave and move onto the next thing. Go to the library, research a new career path that you want to endeavor on. Make new friends, create new hobbies, experience new experiences.

Often times people will look at failure as a setback. I encourage you to look at failure as an opportunity to improve. When people relapse continuously it's easy for them to fall into the mindset of "I will never be sober". This is unrealistic thinking, just because we relapse doesn't mean we're not going to ever be able to achieve long-term sobriety. This does not lessen the effect of relapse. We often times hear relapse is a part of recovery, that couldn't be further from the truth. Relapse is a part of recovery only if we let it. In the case that we relapse, let's look at the things that led up to the relapse. Ex: have I stopped reaching out to sober supports? Have I stopped going to meetings? Am I becoming angry and short tempered easily? Did I treat my family and loved ones any differently? Did I set the bar too high for myself? Did that relationship ending assist in my relapse? What can I learn from this relapse? If we can ask ourselves these questions and answer them honestly, then this relapse becomes an opportunity for us to learn. If we can learn what led up to the relapse and prevent it from happening again then we just failed forward. Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk

5 Min or Less There are certain things that we can do when in early recovery that will help us feel better mentally emotionally and spiritually. It is vital for us to do all three of these in conjunction with our support program and or treatment. These three things are: Exercise: 🏃🏃‍♀️🏀🏊‍♂️move a muscle change a thought. This doesn't mean that we have to take on CrossFit, powerlifting or Pilates. Start small, go for a walk. Anything is better than nothing Eat right: 🍏🍌🥑🥦🌽🥔 not 🍔🍟🌭🌮🍕🌯The food that we put in our body is going to directly affect the way that we feel. Rather than pumping a bunch of highly processed highly palatable foods into our body, let's eat nutrient dense foods that Will make us feel a lot better in the long run. Eat quality proteins, fruits and vegetables and non-processed carbohydrates. Start out small make one meal a healthy meal rather than all our meals being fast food and ice cream Prayer and meditation: 🙏🙏 If you're working some sort of 12 step program, he will come to find out that it is spiritual in nature. So if you are not already doing so, start a practice of prayer and meditation into your life and you will feel a lot better spiritually. Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk

5 Min or Less Visit: www.realrecoverytalk.com for all the episodes Ben and I Can be reached at: [email protected] [email protected] Also Follow us on FB and YouTube @RealRecoveryTalk When having a conversation with somebody it's important that we try and practice active listening. Active listening will let that person know that we hear them, although we may not be able to relate, we understand what they are saying. Active listening is a great way to have healthy communication with whoever that person may be. If you have a loved one that is struggling with addiction, eventually you will have to have a conversation with them. So being able to listen actively is very important. If we cannot listen actively, it portrays that we don't care for them, we don't hear them, and we are disregarding their feelings. Active listening is something that we can practice on a daily basis. Next time you're having a conversation with someone pay attention to your body language, your tonality, and your eye contact. Try not to stare off into space somewhere, leaving them think that you are not paying attention to them. Repeat back to them what they have said in your own words and offer your feedback if warranted. Often times all people want is for you to listen and to not speak. Don't forget that.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Today Ben and I will talk about the importance of helping other people in sobriety and why this is significant for your own recovery. When we help other people, we are helping ourselves, which is, in essence, selfish. However, this is a definite form of selfishness because when we help others, we are also assisting ourselves in not only their recovery but our own recovery. In this episode, I talk with Brad Jensen, the founder of Key Nutrition, who is in recovery. He comes to us today to talk about how fitness and health have positively impacted his sobriety. Brad also talks about his struggles with sobriety. He'll talk about his experience, his awareness of the three pillars to life, and how he can assist clients with his coaching to be more successful on the path of sobriety. Ben talks about a quote he learned, "The best way to get out of your own shit is to jump into someone else's shit." There are days and situations where you may feel down regardless of what you do to get yourself out of feeling low. When I start helping someone else, my positive state of mind when helping others definitely changes my attitude. At Real Rock Recovery, we work with the local church and nursing home as an opportunity to help others, which keeps up humble and appreciative of what we have in life. Finding joy and peace in helping others, especially when mentoring other addicts, creates a sense of gratefulness for what you have. Listen in to find out how you can become grateful for what you have, what you can give others, having the ability to become a sponsor, and give others their medallion. Find out what type of commitments Ben has made at H & I's and how he feels rewarded by using his time to help others. Find out what Ben has to say to others who feel that they have nothing to share. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [06:27] Why you should be selfish with your recovery. [09:21] Tom talks about his opportunity to help others in Bell Glade. [15:44] Ben speaks about the medallion ceremony, the thoughts and the hard work behind those who have earned their medallion. [18:20] How Ben figured out he wanted to start helping and mentoring others through sobriety. [20:02] People who want to help others versus people who aren't interested in helping others. [21:44] What Ben would say to people who think they have nothing to offer others. [24:56] No matter how much time we have, there will always be someone with less time than us. [26:44] Are you hanging out with someone at the same level as you or are you branching out and meeting new people? [30:18] No matter what way, shape or form, reach out to help other people! Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brad Jensen | Key Nutrition Coach

5 Min or Less It is not weak to admit defeat! I am an addict. I am an alcoholic. In this video we discuss the importance of qualifying. We have the only disease, that tells us we don't have it, that has to be self diagnosed. If I do not admit to myself that I have a problem, I am most likely not going to seek out a solution. Admitting that I am an alcoholic or a drug addict, is simply stating that I need to change. When the pain of staying the same, becomes greater than the pain of change, is when change occurs.

Does it need to be said? Does it need to be said by me? Does it need to be said by me right now? After putting down the drink and drug, my next goal was to figure out how to live life. How can I live life in such a way that minimizes anxiety, worry, resentment or the like? I know that if I live my life feeling these negative feelings as a constant, I will eventually go back to the "ease and comfort" of a substance. So my new job is to minimize the amount of time that I have these feelings. The question is, how do I keep these feelings to a minimum? That begins with making sure that I do not put myself in such situations to begin with. How can I best avoid confrontation and conflict so that these feelings don't arise? First of all, I need to learn how to communicate with others. One of the best ways to do this, is to figure out when and where to involve myself in disagreements. I have come to find that by just sitting back and keeping my mouth shut, I find myself in less confrontation. Time heals all wounds. What may have seemed like a big deal today, may mean nothing by tomorrow. If I had just kept my mouth shut, I could've avoided a lot of confrontation.

You are who you surround yourself with! The people that we choose to hang around with will directly affect the level of success we achieve throughout our sobriety. If we choose to hang out with losers, we will lose. If we choose to hang with winners, we will win. This goes for anybody in life. Not just people getting sober. If you want to be a successful business person then hang out with successful business people. If you want to be a successful mountain climber hang out with successful mountain climbers. Although this sounds very surface level it is the absolute truth. Often times people claim they want to be "sober" but spend the majority of their time doing things that non-sober people would do. Sobriety means so much more than just putting down the drink or the drug. It is about changing our lifestyle. And that often times means changing our people, places and things. We need to have a total mindset shift when getting sober and that happens by hanging out with people that resemble sobriety. Stick with the winners!!!

So you think you know what it means to surrender in recovery? A term that gets thrown around a lot in recovery is the word surrender. It sounds good when you say it, but do you really know what it means? Do you really know what you're committing to? I thought surrender meant to go over to the winning side, or give up. Come to find out, it means "to agree to the terms of peace." Meaning, if you want peace, there is going to be terms. There may still even be consequences. Just because I surrender, doesn't necessarily mean I get to go home free. I'm probably still gonna have to go to jail or report to court at some point. That doesn't sound fun! Point is, surrender is usually followed up with some sort of commitment, task, consequence or the like. When I surrender to a life of recovery, it means that I am going to have to do some work to find and keep the PEACE.

5 Min or Less You Gotta Put In the Work! please visit www.realrecoverytalk.com Follow @realrecoverytalk Join @realrecoverytalksupportgroup If you are going to take the plunge into getting sober, you have to understand that it is going to take a lot of hard work. I sometimes think that people are under the misconception that getting sober is just about stopping using drugs and alcohol. That is very far from the truth. I have noticed that when things get hard for people that is when they tend to quit. When challenges arise, or uncomfortability sets in, then they'll throw in the towel. This is the time that you have to knuckle down and do the work that you don't necessarily want to do. When you are in addiction treatment it is hard work. If you want to get anything out of treatment itself you have to be willing to work hard, be vulnerable, be honest and grind it out If you're able to continue to work hard and to put forth all your efforts into your sobriety you will succeed. I can guarantee sobriety for anybody that is willing to work hard, nonstop! Don't come into this looking for an end date or a graduation certificate. Come into this understanding that there is no end date and this isn't something you graduate from, it's a lifestyle.

5 min or Less I can see straight through your "stage-character!" There is a reason 30 days is not enough to get to the underlying issues and the root of the problem. Every client comes into treatment presenting their stage character. This is the person that they want everybody to think they are, so they can get the reputation they think they deserve. Funny thing is, this usually gives way after about three weeks. When a client is under the watchful eye of a facility, they can only keep their character defects hidden for so long. Their true character will eventually come out. This is a good thing. It exposes the truth about their personality and character. A personality and character that must change in order for an individual to attain long-term sobriety. My sponsor told me, I didn't have a drug and alcohol problem; I had a personality problem. So let me ask you. If it takes a treatment team around three weeks to see what the underlying issues are, how are we supposed to fix that in a remaining week? This is assuming the client committed to 30 days of treatment. This is why it is so highly recommended that somebody commit to around 90 to 120 days at minimum. Years of drug and alcohol addiction can not be undone in 30 days! This is assuming, you are of course the real deal addict or alcoholic. In my case, I have the PRIVILEGE of participating in recovery everyday for the rest of my life! And it is awesome!

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Today I will talk about the process and path of a person moving from being a "normie" to using drugs and alcohol and becoming an addict. In this episode, I talk with Brad Jensen, the founder of Key Nutrition, and is in recovery. He comes to us today to talk about how fitness and health have positively impacted his sobriety. Brad also talks about his struggles with sobriety. He'll talk about his experience, his awareness of the three pillars to life, and how he can assist clients with his coaching to be more successful on the path of sobriety. Struggling with anxiety and ADD from age 12, he tried alcohol as a release and found drinking worked to relieve his stress. Additionally, he was overweight and was picked on by friends. By age 14, Brad jumped into reading books on health and fitness and was hooked on his health class at school. He remembers wanting to look like a bodybuilder on the cover of a magazine, then realizing that alcohol would not let him achieve his goal and quit drinking. At the end of his sophomore year, he was fit, but still had anxiety and was presented with opiates at a party. Even with a stable family situation and a good life, Brad fell into drugs and alcohol. "This wasn't supposed to happen to a guy like me," he says, recalling his stable family life. Brad continued bodybuilding, along with his heroin addiction, until he finally ended up in prison for an extended period. Listen in to find out how Brad denied his addiction for years, how he recovered from his long-term addiction in November of 2012, and the best thing his parents did for him during recovery. Brad also talks about how the loss of his grandfather affected his recovery from addiction. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:59] Brad's journey through addiction and his background with drugs and alcohol. [06:01] Brad tells his story of how he was introduced to and hooked on opiates. [08:45] His experience of trying to take more pain pills and how to get a hold of more. [10:56] Building his identity through distributing opiates, the significant power this gave him and his first experience with heroin. [14:52] His senior year of high school his mom found a briefcase full of drugs. [22:56] Brad's first experience with a long-term prison sentence. [26:18] How Brad's parents stopped enabling him and how this helped him to stop using drugs. [28:06] What happened when Brad asked his mom for drugs. [30:00] Brad's first steps to recovery after he was released from 30 days in prison. [36:54] How materialistic items can keep people sober. [46:30] How fitness and health has impacted Brad's sobriety. [51:54] Get your anger, anxiety and issues out of your head with a good workout in the gym. [54:54] It's not how long you've been sober, it's what you've done during and after your recovery time. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected] Brad Jensen | Key Nutrition Coach

MTV Real World: "the halfway house" In this video I will discuss the abundance of stimulus one feels while living in a sober support community. There is always something entertaining going on. It is the excitement of a new environment. It is the chaos of living with others. I discuss this topic to bring awareness and preparation for the day that you move out into the adult world. All of a sudden you will find yourself alone and dependent upon the outside support community that you have either built or have not built. I always tell our clients to duplicate the same sense of community they feel in treatment, outside of treatment. Being in treatment exposes one to the connection that can be felt. After being exposed, one may find value in establishing a more permanent recovery Community. Treatment and halfway is only temporary. Are you preparing yourself for the day that you move out? Will you feel like you have an abundance of support even though you are no longer enrolled in treatment? Forget halfway, and go the WHOLE-WAY!

Have you ever tried having a conversation with someone and it just isn't going the way that you thought that it would? 🙋🏻‍♂️ I know for myself when someone is not responding to me in the way I don't want to be responded to, I get on the defense. I will start to justify why I am right and you are wrong, I will get angry, I will get defensive and in the end it's not a productive conversation at all. In this video I discuss why it's important to try and have healthy conversation as an adult in recovery. We know resentment is the number one offender. So it is important for us to be able to have conversations with people in a manner that gets something accomplished rather than getting into arguments and everybody gets in a race to see who can become victim first. Ben taught me "You get more with honey than you do vinegar." When I first heard that I questioned it. 🧐 I wasn't quite sure what he was trying to say. But over time it makes sense, the goal is to have constructive conversations with people and in the end everybody is happy. It's easy for me to get angry and defensive and jump on the defense but that never accomplishes anything.. We all do it, but we can all fix it!!

5 Min or Less To cannabis or not to cannabis in recovery? A very popular subject amongst the recovery community is whether or not utilizing marijuana is a relapse or not. The sober support community that I surround myself with does consider it a relapse; Though, one will find individuals who fall into both camps. Who is to say what is sober and what is not? I believe this is for every individual to decide for themselves. We have the only disease, that tells us we don't have it, that has to be self diagnosed. If one chooses to take the risk, are they willing to potentially pay devastating consequences as a result of putting certain motions into play? Or maybe they pay no consequences? Does someone who has worked hard for their recovery really want to take the risk? In this video I will discuss my personal opinion, and look at some of the potential downfalls to partaking in cannabis use. I would advise against doing so, but that is just my opinion.

5 Min or Less Please like and share Real Recovery Talk Am I the only one that I am hurting? Often times as addicts and alcoholics we think that we are the only ones that we are hurting. The unfortunate part is that we are hurting a lot of people around us. The people that we are hurting the most are the people that we hold closest to us. The loved ones tend to think as well that they are not the ones with the problem an"why can't he/she just stop?" Or "its their problem, they can figure it out". So, loved ones, understand that you are part of the problem too. We all play a part in this wether we like to admit it or not. BUT once we are all able to admit that we ALL play a part, let the healing begin!

How dare you take someone else's inventory!!! Not! Have you been told not to take other people's inventory? Well, maybe you should not heed that advice. Reason being, if you spot it you got it. Often times, taking inventory of others is a mirror reflection of character defects that I may own myself. In addition, I had to learn how to be open to allowing others to take my inventory. If I am lying to myself, how do I know? You can't spot self-deception by yourself. Welcoming the feedback of others, and ultimately asking for others to take your inventory can be a necessary tool to achieve an entire psychic change. In conclusion, do not take the inventory of others so that you can be critical of them; take the inventory of others so that you can advise your own personal growth. Never be afraid to hear the feedback of others if it will mean making personal progress.

5 Minutes or Less No is an "OK" Answer Often times it is so hard for parents and loved ones to say NO to the ones that they care about the most. The unfortunate thing about that is, sometimes because we never say NO, it can drive someone deeper and deeper into their addiction. I spend a lot of time talking with parents and loved ones, trying to convince then that it is OK to draw boundaries! There is nothing wrong with saying "No, I am not going to pay your cell phone bill this month" or "No, I am not going to loan you $20 dollars for gas" Addicts and Alcoholics will take someones "niceness" and turn it into a "weakness". It's like the ol' saying, "you give an inch, they will take a mile" Now this doesn't mean, go home and throw your alcoholic son or daughter out oof the house tonight! But it does mean, take a look at yourself, and ask yourself, Am I part of the problem? Am I being to nice? Am I enabling this person to use drugs and drink? What am I doing to provide for this person, while they continue to go out every night and sometimes not even come home? The list goes on and on, I think you get the point. Its OK to say NO!

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page. Today I will talk about the process and path of a person moving from being a "normie" to using drugs and alcohol and becoming an addict. In this episode, I talk about the progression of drug, alcohol, sex - any behavior which can become addictive. Many addictions have the same process from start to finish. However, I'll primarily talk about the four reasons people get addicted to drugs and alcohol. Reason #1: People are trying to mask another problem or issue such as mental illness. Drugs and alcohol help cope with mental illness and make them feel better, or people who have mental illness believe that drugs and alcohol help them to cope with and deal with their mental illness. In my experience, I see the opposite happen. Drugs and alcohol are not a solution, especially schizophrenia. Reason #2: Drugs and alcohol relieve stress. Addicts in this category have a hard time dealing with stress or have always used drugs and alcohol to avoid dealing with a life stressor. This is a perpetual cycle = worsening issues, more drugs and alcohol, the stress doesn't go away, the situation gets worse, so the person takes more drugs and alcohol. Reason #3: Environment - the addict is around others who are using drugs and alcohol. Alcohol was the love of my life, introduced to me by my friends. At 12, I tried Zima with a group of older kids, who I was easily influenced by teenagers who were older than me. As long as someone else was worse than me, that would reinforce that I wasn't an alcoholic. Reason #4: Medical intervention with addictive painkillers causes addiction. When the issue which was causing the pain was resolved, our body goes through withdrawal. Many IV heroin addicts started with opiate painkillers used after an accident and injury. These people usually don't have a family history of drugs and alcohol. Listen in to find out more detail about the four paths to drug and alcohol addiction and how families react to their loved one's addiction. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:20] Reason #1 People get addicted to drugs because they are trying to cope with a mental illness. [08:25] Schizophrenia is negatively affected by marijuana use. [10:00] Reason #2 Drugs and alcohol relieve stress [12:14] Parents and loved ones always ask "Why can't they just stop?" [15:50] Reason #3 The addict is surrounded by drugs and alcohol. [19:13] Reason #4 Addiction from the use of opiate drugs prescribed by a doctor. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

5 Minutes or Less 1/15/20 Wear Recovery like a loose garment Recovery isn't something that is supposed to stress us out! We are being given the opportunity to start a new life, and we can create it however we want to create it! Often times people look at sobriety as a "death sentence" and think since they are sober now they they are not going to be able to have fun and now their life is going to suck! That is so. Far. From the truth! We should not be so stuck up! Enjoy the process and everything that goes with it! There are new experiences that we are going to have and people that we are going to meet, and it is because we GOT SOBER! Dont let the idea of sobriety hold you back. Yes, the decisions that we make moving forward need to have our sobriety in mind. We do not want to put ourselves at risk to relapse. But don't let sobriety choke you out! It isn't supposed to be miserable!