Marriage and Martinis

New York Times' Bestselling author, Jancee Dunn, joins Danielle and Adam to discuss her ideas about "The Mental Load" and how her marriage almost ended after the birth of her first child. Using "escapism" to deal with an overwhelming and stressful situation, Jancee's husband left her with the bulk of the parenting responsibilities from day one, causing an enormous amount of friction to occur within their otherwise strong and wonderful marriage. Determined to resolve the issue and figure out a more balanced set of parenting tasks, Jancee went full force into research mode, talking to experts, therapists, and even a hostage negotiator to figure out how to overcome this enormous hurdle. How could they communicate their needs more effectively? How could they stop fighting in front of their child? How could they get back to being the loving, connected couple they once were? Jancee is both hilarious and relatable while telling all about her experience with what so many couples go through after kids. Her honesty is refreshing, and fits in perfectly on Marriage and Martinis.How Not To Hate Your Husband After KidsSign up for the Famous "Friday Five" emails on the homepage of marriageandmartinis.com to get this episode's supplementary "Date Night Questions."Episode Sponsors:Best FiendsRitual 10% OffBambino MARRIAGE for $10 OffPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's been over twenty years since Danielle and Adam were in the dating game. They asked millennial reality star (Bravo's "Summer House") and stand-up comic, Hannah Berner, to fill them in on everything they're missing. Danielle and Adam quickly find out they are way too old, exhausted, and lame to partake in the single lifestyle of today. Hannah very patiently explains apps like Tinder and Hinge, and hilariously breaks down some of the worst dates and relationships she's ever had (don't listen around the kids). Danielle has to refrain from being the big sister/mom advice-giver and just listen as Hannah details some of her most awkward and questionable moments trying to find a life partner. Adam feels as though he's being spoken to in a different language (what's an "eskimo sister," anyway?) with all the lingo that Hannah introduces to them. Danielle and Adam learned a lot (maybe too much) this episode and had so much fun with Hannah as she talked to them about trying to date and balance her life as an up-and-coming "entrepreneurial powerhouse." Don't forget to sign up for the "Friday-Five" at marriageandmartinis.com to get this week's supplemental "Date Night Questions." Check out Hannah on this season of Summer House in Bravo and find out more about her at hannahberner.comEpisode Sponsors:BooknotesFeals 50% OffVush Promo Code: MAM65 for 65% Off EmpressLola Promo Code: MNM30 for 30% OffPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

These days it can be overwhelming to figure out exactly what terms like "self-care" and "wellness" actually mean. Do self-care and health have to align? Has the wellness industry gotten completely out of hand? What are Adam and Danielle's thoughts about incorporating self-care into their everyday lives? What "wellness" products has Danielle bought over the years that Adam has thought were completely ridiculous? This is definitely not your average conversation on these topics, and their opinions probably would not parallel those of most doctors and therapists who discuss forms of self-care and wellness, but it is definitely an honest take on the subject. As confusing as these subjects are, Adam and Danielle are just trying to make sense of it all as regular people who want to live their best life without getting sucked in to the trends and fads that oftentimes sway people into believing there's a "magical" solution to so many of our problems.Sign up for the "Friday Five" emails on marriageandmartinis.com to get this week's "Date Night Questions" associated with this episode.Episode Sponsors:Vush Promo Code: MAM65 for 65% OffMod Cloth Promo Code: MNM for 15% Off $100 or moreBest Fiends Free DownloadPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam delve more deeply into their discussion with their special guests (Danielle's parents) during this episode, including a lightening round of listener questions. How was Linda so confident with her laid back parenting style? What was her parenting philosophy when she took Danielle to see an R rated movie at three years old? What does Danielle still remember her mom telling her about sex as a teenager? About what issue did the couple most commonly fight? How did Ron's arduous, high-stress career affect his role as a spouse and what did he learn over the years concerning "taking work home?" What was a time during their marriage when they almost didn't last? How would they sum up the secrets to it all in just a few sentences? And the most commonly asked question of all: is sex still a priority after almost sixty years together?Marriage and Martinis is so lucky to have such an experienced couple who has stood the test of time come on as guests. Thank you to all our listeners who sent messages and kind comments about these episodes. They are near and dear to Adam and Danielle's heart and they think everyone can benefit from listening to a couple who has shown teamwork, compromise, gratitude, and generosity to one another for six decades together.To get the supplemental questions for this episode, head to: https://www.marriageandmartinis.com/post/the-friday-five-2-07-20Don't forget to go to marriageandmartinis.com to sign up for all future emailsEpisode Sponsors:Hunt A Killer Promo Code: Marriage for 20% OffBambino Promo Code: Marriage for $10 OffSpa Finder Promo Code: Marriage for 12% Off $75 or moreDuke Cannon Promo Code: Marriage for 15% OffPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam are so excited to bring you this special episode (the first of two parts), with Danielle's parents, who have been married almost 55 years. Starting at the very beginning, they discuss dating in the late 1950s and how much different it was (do they wish Tinder had been around then?). Going steady, "pinning" ceremonies, and getting married while still in college are all things so many couples of today know so little about. Were they worried about Ron possibly getting drafted for Vietnam? Did Linda feel like she put her own life on hold so her husband could become a doctor? How hard was it to have a long distance relationship without cell phones and texting? Plus, did people really wait til marriage to have sex? This conversation covers so much about the 50s, 60s and 70s. Don't forget to check back next Monday when they release Part Two of this fun and insightful discussion, which will cover parenting and growing older together. Don't forget to sign up for the "Friday Five" on marriageandmartinis.com to get each week's famous "Date Night Questions." This week's will accompany this episode and hopefully inspire others to ask their older relatives more questions about growing up in a different era. Make sure you're following @marriageandmartinis on Instagram to see pictures related to this episode.Episode Sponsors:Duke Cannon Promo Code: MARRIAGE 15% OffHappy Cards Free ShippingModern Gents Promo Code: VDAYMARTINI 25% Off $25Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"A Marriage Story" is up for tons of awards this year, including best picture. Adam and Danielle wanted to release a bonus episode discussing the movie because it delves into a process so seldom seen and dissected. Whether or not a person loves the movie, it definitely offers a ton of interesting details concerning why so many couples enter into a separation with good intentions and the desire to remain friends, only to be miserable and spiteful by the end. In this episode, the two break down the film's background, characters, and pivotal scenes. As a couple who has not faced divorce on a technical level, but has come close to separation more than once, looking in on this process from the outside opened their eyes to so many aspects about which they never before know. Some questions explored in this episode are:Too often does too much go unsaid in a marriage?Could Charlie and Nicole's Marriage have been saved?Was Nicole fighting dirty or just doing what she thought was best for her and her son?Why do two obviously good and caring parents suddenly get treated like a possibly unfit mother and father just because they're entering into a separation?For more on this episode and the "Date Night Questions," head to marriageandmartinis.com/blogPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everything surrounding divorce and blending families can be messy, chaotic, and traumatic for everyone involved if people don't know the healthiest ways to go about this process. Naja Hall is a leading coach, mentor, and podcaster whose goal is to help families through these transitions in the smoothest way possible. She talks to Danielle all about the negative stigmas associated with being stepparents, her own experience as a stepmom of three children, whether it's possible to actually have an amicable divorce, and so much more. She also helps those of us who have friends and families facing these situations know the most effective ways to be there for them. Even if you have never been through a separation and don't ever plan on blending your family, there is still so much to learn in this episode. It's also an awesome episode to share with anyone who might need some more support going through these events. Get the "date night questions" that go along with this episode here:https://www.marriageandmartinis.com/post/the-friday-five-1-24-20Naja Hall:Najahall.comCheck out her facebook groups VIP Stepmom and Blended and Black for more support and expertise on this subject.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Janet Allison is a teacher, mentor, coach and advocate who has made it her life's mission to help boys reach their full potential with the support of parents and teachers. We talk all about communication, shame, gender roles, ensuring boys are active participants in their own households one day and so much more. Whether you're raising boys inside your own home or are an influence in the life of young men to any degree, this episode is definitely worth a listen, and worth sending to anyone who has an impact on boys today.Janet Allison:boysalive.comPodcast: On BoysPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Danielle and Adam are breaking down all things vasectomy related. From stats about vasectomies to the reason why Danielle still wanted Adam to get a vasectomy even though she was going in for a c-section and could have gotten her tubes tied simultaneously. Why are men oftentimes so hesitant about getting the procedure done? Is it really reversible? What were Adam's pre-conceived notions about getting it done verses his thoughts after having gone through with it? Even if you or your partner or not considering getting a vasectomy, this episode will still entertain, inform and give you plenty of subject matter for some good discussion among friends.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Birth control isn't something often discussed in conversation in adulthood. But it is a topic which so many of us have had so many different, as well as similar experiences: from the first time we saw or bought condoms, to how the pill affects our or our partner's physical and mental well being, to the decision of what birth control to use once in a longterm relationship. In this episode, Danielle and Adam are extremely open (and quite explicit) concerning stories involving birth control (or lack thereof). While this episode is not about the medical and "expert" information concerning different types of contraceptives, it definitely contains a lot of extremely identifiable and real moments which will have many listeners laughing at times, and also nodding at how relatable these stories are. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2019 will go down as one of the hardest and most volatile for Adam and Danielle. It was 12 long months of hashing and re-hashing out a whole lot of issues concerning finance, dishonestly, resentment, and misunderstanding. While it definitely all got tedious at times, it also was all very necessary to put them in the direction in which they now seem to be heading. The two of them discuss what mistakes they think they made, what they learned, what they're hoping 2020 will bring, and so much more. On a lighter note, they also discuss favorites of 2019, including movies, shows, and music. As always, it's all real, it's vulnerable, and it's practically unedited....and you'll definitely hear the parts they were going to edit. This is a great episode to conclude this year and look forward to what lay ahead for Danielle and Adam concerning the podcast, their marriage, as individuals, and as parents.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the midst of all the holiday madness, we all need to take a minute and just laugh and de-compress. That's why Danielle and Adam thought it was a perfect week to put out a mindless, fun, and funny episode with no deep thinking necessary. Of course things get a little out of hand, and they reveal too much. This episode is definitely not for the easily offended, and if you want to wait to listen while you're sitting around at night with a glass of wine or a cocktail, we get it. No matter what, you won't be able to make it through this episode without laughing.Skip to 9:16 to get right to the game.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After the overwhelming response to their first episode with Jodie Utter from last February, Danielle and Adam finally had the chance to continue their conversation with her. Where is she now in her journey of healing and forgiveness after her husband's infidelity? Is she able to trust again? How does she deal with the inevitable feelings of pain that come flooding back at any given moment? Is self-forgiveness harder than forgiving someone else? What advice does she have for others going through a similar situation? This is a must-listen for anyone who has dealt with any form of betrayal, not just infidelity. Jodie provides us all with a feeling of hope, understanding, acceptance, and peace. She is gentle, incredibly vulnerable, honest, and reveals all in her quest for no one to feel alone during their healing process. It is important to note that listeners definitely should listen to her episode from February, 2019 in order to hear the first part of her story.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As the new year approaches, let's make some resolutions that will really change our lives for the better: getting just a little bit braver talking to our partners about our sexual needs and desires. Danielle and Adam continue their conversation with sexual communications coach, Leah, all about how couples can handle differing libidos, exhaustion, lack of orgasms, the need for sexual touch throughout the day, and so much more. Leah recommends some "bedroom games," explains why women and men might have such different needs when it comes to sensual touch, explains some misconceptions about the vagina, and talks about why we need to start thinking of sexual experimentation in small increments rather than this huge, overwhelming task. This is an awesome episode to listen to with your spouse, or listen separately and then use it as a tool for discussion.https://www.leahcarey.com/bravePurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In theory, the holidays are an amazing time of year and should feel completely magical. In reality, there are a thousand tasks to get done, anxiety levels are heightened, family time can be overwhelming, and it's all expensive AF. Life coach Amy sits down with Adam and Danielle to discuss ways that we can ensure that this year will be more enjoyable for everyone. Being more intentional with our time, remembering acts of self-care, communication with our partner, and seeing the bigger picture are just some of the ways that help lessen the intensity of it all and allow us to focus on the more memorable details. This episode is fun and light, but also definitely covers a lot of topics and gives a ton of useful strategies and ideas. Amy, Adam and Danielle each discuss memories of the holidays from childhood.What are Adam and Danielle doing differently with their kids this year concerning gift giving?How bad at math is Danielle, really? (It's really bad)What can spouses do to make each other feel more comfortable while at one another's family's houses for the holidays?What are some ways we can make parties and gatherings easier for introverts?How do we figure out how we want to look back on this season and feel about it all?What steps do we take to get wind up with successful results?Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The founders of Grown and Flown took time out of their book tour to talk to Danielle all about raising kids and young adults between the ages of 14 and 25. Danielle asks them how we can gauge when we are giving them too much independence or not enough, how to deal with teens who no longer want to spend time with the family during events and activities, if we should really be driving their forgotten homework and gym clothes to school, how to handle conversations with kids who are unsure about attending college, and so much more. This episode is filled with great strategies to use in order to keep open communication with our kids no matter how old they're getting, and ways to ensure our home is a safe space where they feel they want to be. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Last weekend Danielle went to see Glennon Doyle live in NYC, and during the show, writer and activist, Glennon, said something that was a gut punch to Danielle. She was talking about how one day when she was in her former marriage, she looked around and said, "Isn't it all supposed to be more beautiful than this." It was this phrase that initiated Danielle's idea for her and Adam to check in with each other about needs they might still have within their relationship. What are they not getting enough of which they still desire? What are they currently kicking butt at in their relationship? How has everything been between them these past few months? John Gottman says that the number one questions spouses need to be asking each more is, "how are you doing?" and that is exactly what Danielle hopes this episode will lead to in more relationships.In this episode, Danielle discusses why aging makes it even more important for partners to show love to one another.Adam discusses how he snapped out of being in a bad mood every night after work.The two debate how important romance is in a relationship even if everything else between the partners is completely fine.Danielle describes what she and Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman have in common.Adam talks about needing to take baby steps when getting back to a place they were before.Danielle reads an excerpt from one of her favorite books, "Love Warrior."Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam have always been very honest that finance has been a big source of stress in their relationship. They've had periods of feeling like they were in a really good place concerning money, and times when it has been a complete disaster. This episode, unlike the other finance episodes they had a few months ago, are not with experts giving advice, but rather, just their personal experiences with finance, both growing up and as a couple. They discuss everything from how Danielle deciding to be a SAHM affected their situation, to Adam's period of binge-spending as a way to deal with his hardships, and how their lack of communication made everything worse. This episode is very relatable for any partner who has ever felt there was a great imbalance concerning spending in their own marriage, and for any couple who is finally trying to get their life back on track.Adam and Danielle discuss:- How private school impacted their feelings of inadequacy and jealousy-Adam's obsession with buying a house he couldn't afford-Danielle wanting Adam to prove his willingness to spend on her when he bought her expensive jewelry-The feeling of having your credit card declined in public-The purchase Adam made that Danielle wanted to smash to pieces-How they used spending money together as a form of therapyPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Mom shamers unite - and leave....no one wants you here. Danielle and our guest host Tara Clark (aka @modernmomprobs) are talking all things mom shaming. They discuss personal experiences in real life and in the virtual world, and why we need to stop asking people when they’re having kids. These ladies touch on everything from breastfeeding to screaming kids on airplanes, and the time when Danielle let her newborn cry hysterically in an elevator and what ensued with a stranger. Plus, how can we make moms feel more supported? Check out this episode no matter how old your kids are or even if you have no plans on ever having them. And send it to someone who might need a bit more support right now. It’s an episode intended for absolutely everyone.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam are joined by actual Millennial, Sarah Merrill (also know on Instagram as @bigkidproblems), who is currently in the midst of planning her own wedding. The three of them discuss the differences that naturally arise when getting married at age 24 verses age 32, how weddings have changed since Danielle and Adam were planning theirs 18 years ago, how technology has completely reconstructed the wedding industry, and the actual costs of being in a bridal party. This is such a fun episode, but also dives into some issues such as what happens when you have to share the decision-making about aspects such as the guest list, venue, and honeymoon with two sets of parents. Sarah tells her incredible engagement story, and also her experiences going to extremely non-traditional, more modern weddings such as the one she recently attended at the "House of Yes" involving bathtubs, twerking, and endless amounts of glitter. This is not the same kind of wedding that Adam and Danielle are used to, and they are super jealous. If you are planning a wedding, know someone who is, or just want to hear all about all the amazing options available to brides and grooms today, you definitely want to tune in to this episode. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's incredible how the roles and careers we choose to partake in as adults turn out to be nothing like we expected, and how little we were warned what is truly involved in life at work and at home. In this episode, Danielle discusses how shocking it is that being a stay-at-home-mom is not at all how she pictured it, and she's constantly feeling like a failure because she's terrible at the aspects of being a "homemaker" that she never thought about. She also discusses how she spent years being a high school teacher, and that job too came with so many unexpected responsibilities that they don't warn you about when getting your degree. Adam discusses the physical aspects of being an adult that are beginning to wear him down, and the shocks of parenting that are still thrown at him all the time. On the other hand, Danielle and Adam talk all about the awesome things involved in being "grown-ups" and how cool it is to have the freedom that comes with getting older. No matter your role or career, if you ever feel like you had no freaking clue what was coming your way, you'll definitely want to listen to this episode.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Miriam Kirmayer is a therapist, writer, speaker, and relationship expert who has spent the last decade researching young adult friendships. Her work focuses on helping others navigate life transitions, achieve their goals, and build stronger relationships with the people who matter most. A leading voice in the media, her words and advice have appeared in outlets such as The Atlantic, Forbes, The New York Times, TIME, Vogue, and Women’s Health. As a consultant, Miriam partners with businesses and brands on a variety of initiatives related to social connection and well-being. Website: www.miriamkirmayer.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/miriamkirmayer Facebook: www.facebook.com/miriamkirmayer Twitter: www.twitter.com/miriamkirmayerPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Relationship experts will tell you it's the little things partners do for each other that actually wind up going the longest way in a marriage. Big, elaborate gifts are meaningful in their own way, but we need to concentrate on the small moments and favors that help show each other that we are actively thinking about the other person. Danielle and Adam discuss everything from choreplay to compliments to the gift of "the nap" within relationships. Also, how did watching their own parents' interactions affect their own expectations of what partners are supposed to do for one another? How have those expectations changed over the years? What do they feel they would like one another to do more of in the future to show they care? How does Gottman's famous "six-second kiss" affect their daily routine, and what other advice does Gottman give in this area? And, what occurred a few weeks ago to show Danielle that this topic was an absolute necessity as soon as possible? This episode is fun, insightful, and offers just the right amount of TMI, in natural Marriage and Martinis style.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kim Cavill is a sex educator and host of the podcast “Six Minute Sex Ed,” meant to help start the conversation between parents and kids about all things sex and sexuality related. As a sex-positive parent, she is attempting to get rid of the shame that surrounds the teachings of sex that currently exist in schools today. We discuss age-appropriate conversations no matter how old your kids are, where and when the best times to open a dialogue are, which parent should be the one leading the discussion, and so much more. Kids deserve a more positive understanding of how sex can impact our lives, and not just learn about it from a risk-based approach. Giving them a safe space at home to feel they can ask any question is the first step as parents if we want to truly bridge the gap on this topic with our children. No matter the age of your kids or if you’re maybe planning on having kids sometime in the future, this is definitely a very important and insightful episode.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people know about Alexis Haines from her role in the notorious group of teenagers who robbed over 3 million dollars in cash and possessions from the houses of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Orlando Bloom and more. She also starred in the E! network reality show, "Pretty Wild." We sat down with Alexis to talk all about this out-of-control time in her life when she was addicted to heroin, was dealing with the trauma of her childhood, and a prison sentence. But what came after this time was a period of healing, hard work and intense recovery. Now a doula, drug counselor, wife and mom, Alexis is actively ensuring people have a safe space to come forward, tell their truth, and do so without shame or judgment. Her podcast, "Recovering From Reality," helps to show people how fulfilling life can be once we embrace our past and deal with our mistakes. *Trigger warning: this episode contains discussion of childhood trauma and drug addiction. This is Alexis's vulnerable and honest story about going from rock bottom to the top of her game. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

*TRIGGER WARNING: Talk of addiction and being the spouse of an addict.Adam and Danielle have experienced both sides of gambling: the fun, exciting side, when winning is an adrenaline rush and getting caught up in the moment feels incredibly fun and exhilarating. But they've also experienced the much more negative aspects of gambling and what can happen when that feeling becomes an escape that starts to get all too familiar and frequent.This episode is really two parts: the first part has a lighter, more nostalgic tone, looking back on how growing up an hour from Atlantic City was a big part of their childhood, and how a portion of the beginning of their relationship was rooted in the more glamorous side of casinos and spending money. The second part delves more deeply into the serious side of when gambling becomes an addiction rather than a once-in-a-while activity. The financial ramifications, mistrust, and spiraling out of control are just a few of the harsh realities they were forced to ultimately face and deal with. How did they deal with it? What were the next steps? Listen to the episode to find out how this regular couple dealt with critical circumstances.If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, there is absolutely no shame in getting help. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Over the past few decades, there has been a lot more openness about the fact that monogamy is not the only type of lifestyle for couples. Polyamory, open marriage, swinging and other options are making some partners wonder if any of these experiences are right for them. In this episode, Danielle and Adam discuss how their upbringing formed their understanding and opinions about monogamy. They discuss whether or not trying to have an open marriage would ever be on the table, and what experiences they might want to have if ever given a "free pass." Is Monogamy inherent in our being or is it a social construct created to keep order in society? Why is Danielle mad at herself for something that happened 20 years ago, and how does she wish she had handled her youth differently? How will Adam and Danielle feel about their own children possibly wanting to explore non-monogamy? Listen to episode to find out how and why this is a conversation and topic that is coming up more and more in relationships across the US and around the world.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 Adam and Danielle continue their Los Angeles adventure by traveling to "The Valley" to meet Erica and Jamilah from the podcast, "Good Moms, Bad Choices." After realizing very quickly that it was fate for the four of them to meet, the conversation got extremely comfortable and there were pretty much no inhibitions about anything. Thus begins the discussion about everything from Danielle's last visit to LA in which she visited the Menendez Brothers (but, for real....), a clarification of what "The Valley" actually is, anyway, and a whole lot of real talk about teaching our daughters about body image, Jamilah's "free the nipple" movement, how old is too old to be naked in front of our kids, and so much more. If you imagine sitting around with your three best friends all day holding nothing back, and someone came in and just recorded the middle hour, that pretty much sums up this episode. It's fun, it's a tad out of control (in the best way possible), and for sure is going to be continued sometime in the near future. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Adam and Danielle sit down with Jodie Sweetin and Celia Behar, BFF's from the Never Thought I'd Say This podcast. The four talk all things friendship, including how these two women met and formed a lifetime bond via social media, how our value of friendship in our lives has changed over the years, how friendship differs for men than for women, and whether or not it's ok for a significant other to have good friends of the opposite sex. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

While maybe not every single person feels like they've lost some of who they were before they got married and had kids, a good amount of people seem to agree that in order to gain part of ourselves through parenthood, we sacrifice a large part of our former identity. Passions, dreams, and talents get put on the back burner in order to take care of those around us, and it becomes apparent that we are not the same person we once were. Of course we're grateful for what we have and may not want to change it for the world, but we also look forward to one day being able to explore our individuality again once the kids are grown and no longer need us on a daily basis. Will we even know what we're looking for once that happens? Danielle and Adam dive into all of this and more in this episode.Episode Sponsors:ItalicGreenlightArtikivePurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Back to school can be such a stressful time for parents and kids when motivation is a struggle and there's enormous pressure in school and extracurriculars. Homework, catching the bus on time, study skills and organization are all things we discuss in this helpful and insightful episode. Fortunately, humans continue developing executive function skills far into their twenties, so there's hope and time for us to keep teaching and building on helpful techniques. This episode is a must listen for anyone who wants to ease the weight of expectations from schools, coaches, and most of all, ourselves.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Rachel Sobel of the blog Whine and Cheez Its is talking all things co-parenting, blended families, and finding happiness after divorce. What was it like dating again while having a young daughter? What have been the challenges of remarrying and how has she dealt with those hurdles? What advice does she have for others going through a similar situation? How did she know when it was time to end her first marriage and move on? We discuss all this and more in this heartfelt but fun and at times humorous conversation.Episode Sponsors:KartriteCare Of Promo: MNM for 25% offGreenlightPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When was the last time you came up with some new ideas to spice up the romance and intimacy in your relationship? Adam and Danielle decided it was time to take things to the next level after 17 years of marriage, and let's just say the conversation and topics become more than either of them can really handle. Listeners can only imagine where this conversation goes, and let's just say it's not for the faint or timid. But if you're in the mood for some naughty, real, and even helpful information, then sit down, relax (awkwardly), and get ready to hear a whole lot of TMI.Want to be on the Marriage and Martinis podcast? Listen to the end of this episode to find out how!Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jamie Lynn Sigler and Jenna Parris of the "Mama Said" podcast talk with Adam and Danielle about things we're no longer giving a f*ck about and how we're saying no to things for the first time since becoming parents. It's empowering to finally prioritize everything in our lives rather than feel like we need to say yes to everything. Adam gives the guy's perspective on canceling because we just can't possibly say yes to everything, while the women feel like it's a lot less easy to cancel on people without the guilt. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In one of their most vulnerable episodes yet, Danielle and Adam discuss a time when Danielle’s OCD was so debilitating that she could not leave the house, make phone calls or hold a job. Unable to understand that was happening, Adam couldn’t give her the help she so desperately needed. The two of them also discuss medication, the complications of being a spouse or being married to a spouse with mental illness, the petrifying aspects of “intrusive thoughts,” and so much more. If you or someone you love suffers from anxiety, you do not want to miss this painstakingly honest episode.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nick He was born and raised in China in an extremely traditional home and community that never discussed sexuality. So when he thought he might be attracted to men, he assumed he must be diseased and broken. We talk to him about his journey from China to America, where he put himself in numerous dangerous situations looking for love on Craig's List, coming out to his parents, and ultimately finding love and creating a family through surrogacy. His story is heartbreaking, inspiring, and completely filled with love. His struggles and accomplishments are beyond incredible and we are so happy his story has a happy ending.Episode Sponsors:GreenlightNoemie Promo Code: MNMPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Boundaries are something that most therapists say are healthy within a relationship. What small boundaries do you and your spouse  have with one another? What bigger boundaries? Danielle and Adam both admit that they struggle with boundaries on different levels, and it has definitely affected their relationship and their lives. What line did Adam cross on 4th of July that inspired the idea for the episode and reminded Danielle that Adam’s struggle with limits is still very much there. What limits and boundaries do Adam and Danielle think they’ll have as parents of teenagers? For anyone who struggles with doing anything in moderation and is constantly working towards achieving a peaceful balance in life, then this is the episode for you.Episode Sponsors:GreenlightArtkive Promo Code: mnm for $20 OffPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Marriage expert Liz from the #1 relationship app, Lasting, is back answering all our questions about trust, including is ok to track your partner? Should you be able to check their social media? How do you truly regain a partner's trust? And giving insight about how to have those awkward conversations about sex. She gives so much great information, and it was so awesome to get a professional perspective about so many topics about which we're uncertain. https://buy.getlasting.com/annual-sale to get the app for ONLY $4.16 a month! That's 40% off the regular price. Check it out.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Throughout society, there seems to be this unanimous ideal of achieving an overall "happy" life. But, what does this mean and how do we get there? How much control do we really have over our emotional state and is it possible to change all of that even as adults? Life coach Amy is back again to give us ideas, exercises and the knowledge we need to become more fulfilled. As always, the conversation with her is fun, the big sister/little sister/brother-in-law dynamic is hilarious, and the conclusion is doable and relatable. If you're looking for easy steps to make your daily living feel like less of a chore and to have more "flow," you do not want to miss this episode.Sonja Lyubomirsky - Science behind happinessMihaly Csikszentmihalyi- Flow Harvard StudyDan Harris - MeditationRick Hansen: Negativity Bias and NeuroplasticitySharon Salzberg Meditation Episode Sponsors:Care Of Promo code MNMGreenlightDuke Cannon Promo code MARRIAGE for 15% OffLovebook Promo code MNM20Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Marriage and Martinis launched one year ago, and the past year has been an absolute rollercoaster ride and adventure. What started as a small idea that seemed somewhat unrealistic to Danielle and Adam has turned into more than they could have hoped or imagined. In this episode, they discuss what they've learned about themselves, life, and each other. Coincidentally, this past year has also been one of the most difficult for the couple, as they've dealt with so much drama within their relationship after many secrets were revealed. How did that all impact the podcast? What have been their favorite episodes so far? Sit back and listen to some fun conversation as they re-hash the memories, shocking moments, and funny aspects of their first year as podcasters.Episode sponsors:Barkbox.com/MNM Get one extra month free when you sign up for a six or twelve month subscriptionLovebookonline.com/MNM Promo code: MNM20 (must be capital letters) for 20% off your orderPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A lot has happened in the lives of Danielle and Adam this past year that has made them totally re-evaluate the idea of what it truly means to feel and be successful. How much do success and wealth overlap? Whom do each of them deem to be truly successful and inspiring? What makes a successful marriage and do they consider their own marriage to be an example of one? What do they not want their kids to lose as they get older and start to equate accomplishment with skill? There's so much more to this topic that needs to be discussed, and it's pretty obvious that there are going to be more episodes to come on this topic.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Doyin Richards is an in demand keynote speaker who goes all around the country discussing modern day fatherhood, how to deal with toxic masculinity, and highlighting what being an involved dad really looks like in today's society. He talks to Danielle and Adam about his experience as a black dad raising two multiracial daughters, why wives need take a step back and let husbands help in their own way, and why he has created a platform that focuses on awesome dads from all different walks of life. Doyin doesn't hold back when talking about his feelings about why men need to step up and do their part, and how we need to shift the conversation to focus on the dads who are in fact good role models, rocking the role of fatherhood.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 Leah Carey is back by popular demand answering listener questions about dry spells, incompatible sexual preferences between partners, and how to achieve a bit more body confidence in the bedroom. Also, we follow up the “when I’m done I’m done” statement Adam so infamously made in the first sexual communications episode (April 5th). Join us in this fun, important conversation concerning how we can all feel a little more comfortable discussing all things sex relatedPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How do we balance our need for safety in our relationship with our need to indulge our wild side? What happens when one person starts to overindulge and the other one has to pick up the pieces? The struggle between these two necessities can be exhausting, and finding a balance is an ongoing process. Danielle and Adam break down the dichotomy and the steps they’re currently taking to get back on track to both getting to enjoy their carefree needs while also creating a safe haven for one another in their relationship.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're delving deeper into this idea of "the mental load." Darcy Lockman is a psychologist who researched the myth of 50/50 partnerships between moms and dads, and why it's taking so long for us to finally find an equal ground concerning parenting and household responsibilities. What were Darcy's findings? What did the hundreds of couples she interviewed reveal about their situations? How can we bridge this gap so everyone feels some relief concerning responsibilities? Also, Adam weighs in as a husband and a dad who says that while it's tough to sit there and listen to all of this, he understands where it's all coming from, but he has a bunch to say on behalf of men, too.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam have been co-habitating for almost 20 years. It's no surprise then that there are a bunch of habits they each have that really annoy each other to no end. For the second time on the podcast (the first time was way back on their second episode!) they duke it out about messiness, forgetfulness, dishes, mail, and so many other habits. Do they both come out of the episode alive? Listen to find out.Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After reading the book, The Polyamorists Next Door, Danielle was so interested in the topic that she asked the author and polyamory expert, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff, to come on the podcast to teach them about a lifestyle which they knew very little. Not to be confused with Polygamy, Polyamory is the act of being open to having more than one consenting relationship, and any gender can partake in having multiple partners. As the book title suggests, Polyamorists truly are living around us, but they are often too frightened to reveal their preferences because of all the stigmas attached to that identity. Dr. Sheff answers Danielle and Adam’s questions concerning how jealousy is dealt with in these relationships, how does one find poly partners, and how Dr. Sheff herself became so fascinated with the community.Elisabeth ScheffPurchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are our expectations for ourselves, our partners, and those around us too high? Are we setting ourselves up for failure? Is social media causing us all to feel we pale by comparison? Adam and Danielle discuss all of this, how their own upbringings has influenced their set of expectations, and what our expectations for our own kids are. Maybe if we can start figuring out a way to appreciate for what we already have and instead of concentrating on what hasn’t happened or gotten done, we would all walk around feeling even a little more satisfied and content. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.