Live Your Love Story

In this episode, we talk about some of our own personal triggers and the opportunities for improvement we've become aware of, for having smoother, more elegant interactions in our conversations and relationship. But first, a minor technical difficulty (Toast's fault) and some ruminating on the current popularity of the wolf cut hairstyle (heard of it? it's mullet adjacent).Shot Notes https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/rein-in-reactivityFind Siena and Toast on Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Working and Relaxing are not opposites. In this ep, we talk about how Western Civilization's dread fear of aging and death seems to be behind our cultural issues around RELAXING, behind Predatory Productivity Culture, and, how that's a real bummer, because knowing how to relax can make you a more pleasant person to be around in general. Siena leads a mini meditation in Progressive Muscle Relaxation (at around 29:30). The main discussion topic starts at about 8:00 into this episode. Check out the Show Notes here Find Siena and Toast on InstagramFlower Essence blendsLove and Above Cat Club.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we go off! on how to NOT get pulled out to sea by the riptide currents of deceitful, delusional, or defeating stories, whether they’re stories from your own head, or from the culture that surrounds you. And we also share a contrarian take on typical inspirational pep talk, advice, and quotes.https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/stories-we-tell-ourselves-pt-3Find Siena and Toast on Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we share how the personal stories we told ourselves about ourselves evolved over the course of our lives…so far.But even before we do that, in the beginning of this ep, we mention a story – and a short film about the story – of three very special giant sequoia trees here in Portland, Oregon. Their website is save-the-giants.org.Toast’s Old Story came from Evangelical Christianity. It was that The Bible was the truth about reality; including that gay, homosexual, LGBTQ+ people are awful, horrible, evil, perverted, and gross. Years Later: Her New Story is that the truth about reality is deeper, wider, more intricate, amazing, textured, spectacular, fascinating, and beautiful than what Evangelical Christianity teaches, and that being gay, homosexual, and/or LGBTQ+ is actually not at all awful, horrible, evil, perverted, or gross. The Old Story was one in which she was the main character. The New Story is one in which she’s not the main character. In the story that works for her, the main character is Life Itself, the life force, "the force that through the green fuse drives the flower." Siena’s Old Story was that she was a victim who got punched and fell down on the ground. Her new story is that she got punched, fell down on the ground, and then got back up with a sparkle cape! Her new story also includes that she’s lucky, she’s blessed, and and she’s fortunate. Get the Show Notes here Find Siena and Toast on Instagram Save the Giants.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We talk about the titanic power that stories have over our lives, and why rushing to make these stories make sense to us is not a good idea. A hit song by America’s first successful black pop songwriter comes into play. The song was written in 1896 and regained popularity in the 1920s! Sorta like how "Stranger Things" and TikTok made all these old songs from the '80s and '90s buzzy again! And we also talk a lot about Taco Bell. Show notes, including the actual song, are at https://sienaandtoast/podcast/stories-we-tell-ourselves-pt-1 And, as we mention, do not go to LoveandAboveCatClub.com ...unless you love cats.https://sienaandtoast/podcast/stories-we-tell-ourselves-pt-1Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastLoveandAboveCatClub.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

WARNING: This episode contains talk about cat-related drama that only deep and genuine cat lovers will get. Please listen (and judge) accordingly. Also! A mystery prize is headed someone's way....In this ep, we talk about:The dark side and the character weaknesses enabled by our on-demand streaming and smartphone lifestyleWhat can make Toast feel like a whiny little b*Cursive handwriting. Did you know kids aren’t being taught to write in cursive anymore? Who’s going to be able to sign their name? I mean really sign their name, not tap their finger on a docu-sign, which is the equivalent of scratching out an "X” on a parchment scroll.Then we get into talking about what’s helped us dial down frustration in a way that feels more respectable and at least somewhat dignified and grown-up (as compared to being a whiny little b*).Show Notes https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/154Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastSiena and Toast Cat Lovers Go Here Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Are you irritable, impulsive? Do you procrastinate? Maybe it’s Decision Fatigue. When you’ve made too many decisions (and it doesn’t matter whether they’re simple or complicated), you get fatigued. It’s just what happens. In this episode, we discuss this phenomenon and what to do about it. Also, Toast is surprised when she learns what Siena thinks about her wardrobe. And, in case it comes in handy, the other ep we mention is "Why You’re In A Rut: The Need For Novelty"sienaandtoast.com/podcast/153instagram.com/sienaandtoastFind out more about Siena and Toast here Love cats? Why You’re In A Rut: The Need For Novelty: sienaandtoast.com/podcast/150Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

It can be hard to form new, healthy habits. The good news is: you can probably take a habit you already have, to help form that new one! In this episode, we discuss Habit Bundling, a tactic for consciously building a new habit.Podcast Notes https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/152Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastFind out more about Siena and Toast here Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Just maintaining, let alone making, new friends, isn’t so easy as an adult. Amirite?! In this episode, we discuss "the 4 a.m. friend," the idealization of friendship, and “the liking gap.” We also take a much (much!) broader perspective to see how our entire economy is set-up to incentivize us away from the bonding social connections that would otherwise emerge naturally. As Charles Eisenstein has explained in his book "Sacred Economics," it does this through usury and interest-bearing debt. Our culture is now between worlds, that is, more of us have realized that the way our economy has been set-up is part of many problems, including this lack and difficulty of nurturing friendships.Show Notes are here https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/151instagram.com/sienaandtoastFind Siena and Toast online Cat Lovers go here Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we talk about feeling dead inside! 😃 And about being introverts, social distancing, getting out of a rut, and what all of this has to do with evolution. If you want to laugh at folks who are still social distancing and wearing masks in indoor public spaces, boy have we got the episode for you!Topics include:the TV shows Yellowstone, 1883, and 1923the sexual and non-sexual meaning of “rut”feeling resistance to getting out of a rutthe connection between variety and well-beingthe famous Rat Park experiments on addictionwhat our own Teeny Tiny experiments in variety have looked like so farhow our desire for variety comes from the same place as the drives for food and sexwhy it makes spiritual sense for variety to feel goodPodcast episode show notes: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/150Find Siena and Toast on Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this ep, we talk about Temptation Bundling, a tool for helping you do things that aren’t very fun, but that you know you should be doing. We share our experiences with it, and how it’s helped us even start to enjoy what started out as an unpleasant or intimidating task. We then go on to discuss the two different ways to apply Temptation Bundling, depending on whether the task is cognitively demanding or not. And finally, we acknowledge that "wanting to feel motivated" can be seen as an attitude that's very spoiled, but why it's admirable and even virtuous all the same.This general topic of motivation was discussed in episode 139 How to Do It When You Don’t Feel Like Doing It, Pt. 1 (Motivation, Exercise, Self-Care)NOTE: also in this ep, we share the semi-dramatic story of a cat crisis averted. It’s a mini audio drama narrated by Siena with live Foley sound effects by Toast.The flower essence blends we mention in this ep are at LoveAndAboveCatClub.comInstagram.com/sienaandtoastShow notes for this ep: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/149Show notes for the prior ep, Pt. 1: https://sienaandtoast.com/139Find Siena and Toast on Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Maybe you’ve found it hard to stick with resolutions or goals or new habits you’re trying to form. We sure have! In this episode, we share a teeny tiny, sneaky little trick that’s helped us follow-thru on all those good intentions.Also: Us! We could go to Mars! We make dinosaur noises What being Filipino has to do with setting big goals (for Siena)Pros and cons of big vs. little goalsTeeny Tiny Goals are there to accomplish Larger Long Term GoalsS.M.A.R.T. Goal:S: specificM: measurableA: attainableR: relevant (as pertains to your other values and goals)T: time-based It was an itsy, bitsy, teenie, weenie, yellow, polka dot goal.Episode notes are at sienaandtoast.com/podcast/148Instagram instagram.com/sienaandtoastConnect with Siena and Toast on Facebook Find Siena and Toast online Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we talk about serendipity. Yes (for those who remember) the 2001 movie (remember?! John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale!) but also the word, what it means, the origin of it, how to experience more of it, and why focus and following through on plans is not *always* preferable to being distracted and being thrown off-course. http://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/147Find Siena and Toast on Facebook Instagram @sienaandtoastConnect with Siena and Toast here Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We talk about the post-holiday blues: how the values and habits of our society contribute to it, how it’s normal, how it can be a good and healthy thing, and more.If you're feeling more than 'just' the holiday blues, please know you can call or text the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988. It's free, confidential, available 24/7, and staffed by skilled, trained crisis workers. Episode notes are at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/146Find Siena and Toast on Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoasthttps://sienaandtoast.comLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Merry Christmas, Mele Kalikimaka. This is the Holiday Special for Fans of Christmas Only. The fun, and foibles of Christmases present, and past, and heartfelt wishes for Christmases future. In this episode:What Will The Neighbors Think: Holiday EditionPump Up The Jam: Bing Crosby RemixRelationship Challenge: The Tree-Decorating TestWe talk about the olden days (The ‘70s & ‘80s), happy golden days of yore.And end the episode with a studio recording we did, of “Silent Night” with a verse in Hawaiian :) HOUSEKEEPING NOTE: no new episode until next year. See you in 2023.Episode notes are at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/145-the-holiday-specialInstagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastYouTube https://www.youtube.com/sienaandtoastLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we chat about Winter Solstice and “being woo woo": it’s similar to being gay (and we would know), and how it’s also Not Scary. In fact, we play a fun little indoor game called Scary Not Scary at 22:32 into this episode. (Are goats scary?) Get ready for Winter Solstice with woo, and fun, and respect and reverence, too. Episodes notes: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/144Episode Do You Believe This Miracle https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/21-miracleroses Find Siena and Toast on Instagram https://instagram.com/sienaandtoastYouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

You don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone. Have you noticed people these days don’t have hobbies like they used to? You might not.You’d have to be old enough to compare today (the 2020s) with the 1970s-90s or so. Over those decades, our society has experienced a decline in hobbies. In this episode, we talk about why, and recall the hobbies we had, way back then. We talk about why hobbies are a healthy thing. And Siena sort of interviews Toast about her hobby of making “time traveling” playlists called “flights.“ Here are the links we mention in this episode:Toast’s blog: https://sienaandtoast.com/toastblogChristmas 100 Years Ago playlist: https://sienaandtoast.com/toastblog/christmas-100-years-agoEpisode show notes: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/143Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

After a debate about artificial Christmas trees, we discuss the dark consequences of Too Many People following the conventional wisdom of focusing on what they CAN change, how we need all kinds of people, including the fighters, and, we are surprised by a non-human guest. More details and show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/142Connect with Siena and Toast www.sienaandtoast.com Instagram Instagram.com/sienaandtoastFacebook Facebook.com/sienaandtoastTwitter Twitter.com/sienaandtoastYouTube.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

This is a ‘talk story’ episode. ‘Talk story’ is the Hawaiian pidgin English phrase for “shooting the breeze.” You’ll hear us Hawaii born & raised folks freaking out about fall foliage (which you can never see in Hawaii), and just hanging out talking about other Thanksgiving-related stuff: food, cooking, and a bonus Thanksgiving playlist with a twist.Show notes are at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast Thanksgiving 100 Years Ago playlist: https://sienaandtoast.com/toastblog/thanksgiving-100-years-agosienaandtoast.com/instagram sienaandtoast.com/facebook sienaandtoast.com/twitter sienaandtoast.com/youtube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Is everyone doing their best? What do you think? In this episode, we dissect phrases like “Everyone is doing their best” and “When you know better, you do better.” We talk about how there are different kinds of “knowing.” You may know how certain foods are healthier than others, but not necessarily in the same way you know how to dance or ride a bike. The episode also includes what “participation trophies” reveal about the dark side of our culture’s values and self-awareness. And ways to think about doing (or not doing) "our best" that make for less anxiety and more growth and graciousness all around.Show notes will be at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/140 Connect with sienaandtoast.comFind them on social media! instagram.com/sienaandtoast twitter.com/sienaandtoast youtube.com/sienaandtoast facebook.com/sienaandtoast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

One annoying thing about being human is wanting to do something, and at the very same time, NOT wanting to do that exact same thing. On this episode, we mash and hash on the weirdness and frustration of this phenomenon, and discus some unconventional ways we’ve approached and overcome the quirky obstacle.One of the most important skills to develop is being able to give yourself a command and follow it.Turn off your brain: don’t even try to be grateful or any of that stuffYou’ll never guess who’s on Toast’s workout playlist. Never.Motion is emotion: emote through movementSelf-concept: what kind of person are you?Beauty is proportion: a beautiful life through proportionate brain useFind show notes at: sienaandtoast.com/podcast/139Instagram.com/sienaandtoastTwitter.com/sienaandtoastFacebook.com/sienaandtoastYouTube.com/sienaandtoastSienaandToast.comLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Trauma, it's a spectrum. This episode covers some everyday anecdotes and practices we’ve found helpful. Also, Toast shares the story of a traumatic experience from her young adulthood. It involved being raised evangelical Christian (when you’re gay) and being outed by a really good friend. Then we share some simple practices, perspectives, and aids that we've found helpful to process and support the healing journey.Find show notes with links at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/138https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/138 SienaandToast.com Connect with Siena and Toast on Instagram Facebook Twitter and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Do you have a love/hate relationship with your to-do list, too? In this episode, we talk about why that is, and ways we deal with it, including some practical changes we’ve made recently to help us just enjoy life more. The discussion moves past productivity systems pretty quick, so we can get into topics like the psychological acceptance of not being able to do everything you want, creative and spiritual work not being valued by our society, respecting individual biological rhythms in a daily schedule, and our society’s blind spot when it comes to defining success. And more.First, though, Siena has a laugh attack, and we use an air fryer for the first time.Show notes are at SienaandToast.com/podcast/137 https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/137SienaandToast.com Find Siena and Toast on Instagram Facebook Twitter and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Maybe don’t write yourself off so easily. We were never the fix-it, handy-person, tool belt wearing kind of lesbians. But then, something happened…. In this episode, we talk about stretching yourself.For pics of the before and after, check out the show notes at sienaandtoast.com/podcast/136SienaandToast.com Instagram Facebook Twitter YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Would you center your identity around another person’s weakness? (Or what you judge to be their weakness.) In this episode we have a wide-ranging discussion about forgiveness. We cover phrases and phenomena like “hurt people hurt people," Fundamental Attribution Error, grudges, revenge and punishment, being triggered by others, the Sermon on the Mount, hoʻoponopono, and more.For complete show notes go to SienaandToast.com/podcast/135 Connect with Siena and Toast on Instagram Facebook Twitter and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

What’s all the excitement about pumpkin stuff coming on the market in the Fall? Is it really about the pumpkins? Really? In this episode, we talk all things Autumn: the pumpkin spice thing, the marketing, and the spiritual side of Autumn. Also! Lots of unexpected appearances by the clematis vine (!)For complete show notes including links go to sienaandtoast/podcast/134 Find out about Siena and Toast! links, music, Love and Above Cat Club and more here Instagram.com/sienaandtoast Facebook.com/sienaandtoast Twitter.com/sienaandtoast Youtube.com/sienaandtoast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, we tell you a true story about a miracle that happened to friends of ours. Then, we talk about how it relates to the meaning of life and the Declaration of Independence. Promise is all makes sense if you listen. Pictures and videos of the cats, including the moment the miracle happened, are in the links.The related episode we mention is 21: Do You Believe This Miracle?Pictures and videos of the miracle brothers Riley and Rocky Find Siena and Toast online www.sienaandtoast.com Cat lovers? Check it out! get the newsletter, hear music and moreInstagram Facebook Twitter YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

What are flower essences and how do they work? In this episode, Siena shares why she began using flower essences almost 30 years ago and Toast nerds out on the science of how they work. We discuss to how take and use them, why they’re ideal for Highly Sensitive People, and why they’re best used consistently over time.Also in this episode: Have you ever heard of a high school class having 14 valedictorians?! Learning to grow vegetables in a home victory garden. Relationships with animals can feel safer than people.Flower essences explained here Find out more about Siena and Toast! Their newsletter, music, Love and Above Cat Club and more www.sienaandtoast.com Connect on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In our more than 20 years as a couple, we’ve definitely had some rough times in our relationship. In this episode, we share one of the things we did to help us through. We used a notebook to help us listen to ourselves and to each other better. It took us probably less than 10-15 minutes each day but it made a big difference.Recipe for Matcha Pops Find Siena and Toast on the web www.sienaandtoast.com Facebook Instagram Twitter and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Our first new episode in over a year! This show is now part of a podcast network. What does that mean? Who even are we? Well in this episode, we give you brief backstories of ourselves as individuals and as a couple (featuring possibly out-of-date terms for LGBTQ folks like us). And we generally just let you know what we’ve been up to in the past year…featuring a big house centipede!Find out more about Siena and Toast at SienaandToast.comLoveAndAboveCatClub.comConnect with Siena and Toast on Instagram Facebook Twitter and YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

ukulele-playing LGBTQ+ folks: check out UkeCurious on Facebook and Instagram (@ukecurious) the evolving alphabet soup of LGBTQIA+ Toast’s emotional reaction to the nouns: girl, woman, ladies, sir, son ‘femmes’ are more common than ever these days, no? support for Pride from mainstream culture (business, entertainment) did not used to happen! The Advocate, an LGBT newsmagazine, was only available at a special magazine store Siena’s first time in a gay bar: underage and underground the sneak attack of representation = Siena loses in a laugh-attack = Toast’s first Indigo Girls concert: omg, so, many, lesbians Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Things are opening up as COVID-19 is being beaten back here in the U.S.. We have stories and thoughts about getting back out there. Topics we touch on in this ep: Happy Pride, we’re boring lesbians. Downtown districts & one way street games NEW, new-fangled parking meters? Bah, humbug. GaithersburgUkeFest.com - we’re participating in their Hawaiian theme on 6/12/21 Post-quarantine & social anxiety self-awareness, self-respect, and other-respect for going at your own pace the opportunity of a century: more support and understanding in establishing new norms in our social lives https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/128-getting-back-out-there-parking-meters-pandemics Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Virtual communication has downsides. In this episode, our chat includes the following thoughts. “productivity” is part of, but not actually everything personal capacity: can you bring your whole self to your social interactions? you’ll have more time if you “waste time” on self-care the strangeness of being the first humans ever, to socialize virtually maybe we’re living in a Black Mirror episode? (Netflix) why Zooms are still taxing, even though you didn’t actually go anywhere or do anything, physically how to ‘come back to yourself’ through physical practices that simply cannot be rushed Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Ahh, the Oregon DMV. It wasn't bad, actually! According to Toast. Siena had a somewhat different take. But one thing's for sure: we both had a blast talking about it afterwards. Join us for the 'first-world problems' and laughs in this ep that includes: iPhone notifications not working "Real ID" technology in new driver's licenses dick-nose mask wearers low-tech stylus simple kindness during heightened race-based violence Oregon vs. California DL pics coconut flour biscuits, Old MacDonald, and rude hand sanitizer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this ep: I Know This Much Is True (HBO Max) people's reactions to your dreams self-doubts and inner conflict an appropriate language of violence within spirituality and personal development we all have wounds, and relationships are in many ways all about that reality one-second kindness Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode: people's *real* opinions about having kids ;) Romero Creations artist spotlight video LoveandAboveCatClub.com COVID-19 survivors: podcast listeners' experience and the symptoms they're still suffering with observations on what life feels like after a year of coronavirus quarantine: hair, shopping, errands, etc. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

In this episode, Siena leads us in introducing a labor of love that has some very personalized goodies created especially for very specific people. People who are lovers of cats, and woo, and who welcome support when it comes to self-care. What exactly is this labor of love? It’s Love and Above Cat Club - loveandabovecatclub.com Also in this episode: one thing about social media that’s good the amazing and amusing thing about the times we are living in the evolution of LGB to LGBT to LGBTQ to LGBTQIA to LGBTQ+ to…? why humans crack us up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

A rambling conversation about our first road trip together, to film a music video for Hawaiian Airlines back in the early 2000s. The convo goes off-track most of the time, and so it also includes... The best recipes we've ever tried for vegan alfredo sauce and bacon; recipes from Detoxinista.com Probably don't go hiking up a small mountain in the Southwestern US in wedge heels, with just one row of fig newtons, even for golden hour When was the last time you bought a CD from a store and dealt with that annoying cellophane wrap and jewel case that broke way too easily? If you live long enough, you'll know the joy of realizing that your life experience chronicles meaningful, material progress in human technology. And amazingly, even though it's forward progress, it can still produce 'backwards' experiences, similar to those of generations 75-100 years ago. The weirdness of road trips, if you've been born and raised on an island Our cat has FOMO RomeroCreations.com – makers of classical guitars and 'ukuleles unlike anything else on the market Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

After a hiatus, we're finally back, with the intention to release 1-2 episodes per month. Until further notice, of course. We're keeping it casual, as this podcast is generally less of a narrow subject-matter-based thing and more of a simple-regular-life-lived-by-a-lesbian-couple thing. In this ep, we just "talk story" (the Hawaiian slang for "chit-chat"), catching you up on some of the stuff that's transpired since our last ep. Christmas music videos we posted on Instagram (@sienaandtoast) Inauguration Day and our reactions to it Toast's emotional therapy: connecting with the America of a century ago through music and words (on Spotify) Learning to bake bread at home Siena's emotional therapy: woo woo, self-care, and cats - follow @sienaleetajiri on Instagram for the woo! Snow, and how Hawaii-raised lesbians deal with it in Portland, Oregon Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We'll be taking a hiatus from the pod; to stay in touch, please follow us on social media: we are @sienaandtoast on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter and/or join our email list. This is the final episode in our series about the Preamble to the Constitution of The United States. Here’s a short list of things we cover. John Adams quote from a letter to his wife Abigail in 1780: "I must study politics and war, that our sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. Our sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history and naval architecture, navigation, commerce and agriculture in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture, statuary, tapestry and porcelain." "self-interest rightly understood." A huge fallacy to correct these days is the fallacy that [individual self-interest] and [the larger community's interests] are mutually exclusive. They're not. “Good Enough” the song that closes this episode, is on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/2LqWYA015s2uuilLE7hYS3 Apple Music (iTunes): https://music.apple.com/us/album/good-enough/1493576062 The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/120-preamble-series-6of6-blessings-of-liberty Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We discuss thoughts that come to mind, when the Preamble to the U.S. Constitution says that one of its goals is to “promote the General Welfare.” This is the second-to-last episode in this series on The Preamble. Here’s a short list of things we cover. positive peace, negative peace CitizenUniversity.us how we spent part of Election Night Ruth Bader Ginsburg: remarks from a Naturalization Ceremony in 2018 – "First, our government has limited power. It can exercise only the authority expressly given to it by the Constitution; and, second, citizens of this country enjoy certain fundamental rights. Those rights are our nation’s hallmark and pride. They are set forth in the Bill of Rights and other amendments to the Constitution. They are inalienable, yielding to no government decree. ... As new, well-informed citizens, you will play a vital part in that endeavor [of achieving a more perfect union] by first and foremost voting in elections, serving on juries, and engaging in civic discourse. ... We sing of America sweet land of liberty. Newcomers to our shore, people like you, came here from the earliest days of our nation to today, seeking liberty, freedom from oppression, freedom from want, freedom to be you and me." “With All The Stars” the song that closes this episode, is on Apple Music (iTunes): https://music.apple.com/us/album/with-all-the-stars/1525066865 and at Daniel's website: https://danielho.com The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/119-preamble-series-5of6-promote-the-general-welfare Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We regroup and recount a week for the ages: Election Week 2020. A fun, frank look back at the emotional roller coaster. See video of the furry Biden-Harris floor dance by our cat Bear, and pics of Siena's Pumpkin Spice Two-Layer Latte cake with Whipped Frosting, at the blog post: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/quickcast-election-hangover Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

A slightly more serious entry in our series on the Preamble to the U.S. Constitution from a spiritual perspective. Here's what we cover in this episode. helping your community is also helping yourself…since you can’t help but live in your community, whatever it is we are all connected, we share this same planet life is, in part, a sequence of opportunities and invitations to experience healing the whole world is medicine “I Won't Shed a Tear” the song that closes this episode, is on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/7qjb66Ge3SdZIlVoCaAO0V Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/i-wont-shed-a-tear/1493576062 and other streaming and music download marketplaces The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/118-preamble-series-4of6-the-common-defense Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Continuing our series on the Preamble to the U.S. Constitution from a spiritual perspective, here's what we cover in this episode (including asides ;) Please and Thank You for VOTING!!! our imitations of Star Wars sound effects cauliflower pizza crust overly sensitive smoke alarms the crucial importance of practicing intentional peacefulness in public spaces during this time "If uncertainty is unacceptable to you, it turns into fear. If it is perfectly acceptable, it turns into increased aliveness, alertness, and creativity.” ~ Eckart Tolle thoughts from Shel Silverstein managing our fight/flight/freeze essential oils, tapping, and other ways to help our organism directly this year, especially, it's not Election Day, but Election Week(s) “Tell Me” the song that closes this episode, is on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/1PYSGsuzkaVl0CIty8nae2 Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/tell-me/1493576062 and other streaming and music download marketplaces The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/117-preamble-series-3of6-domestic-tranquility Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Continuing our series on the Preamble to the U.S. Constitution from a spiritual perspective, here's what we cover in this episode (including asides ;) that have nothing to do with the Constitution). Also: VOTE VOTE VOTE!!! and help others to VOTE VOTE VOTE!!! scary movie viewing recommendations from Siena, for Halloween season, in case real life doesn't scare you enough "Justice is what love looks like in public." – Cornel West prison doesn't have to be seen as, or called 'punishment' our cat Bear snoring the idea of 'letting God take care of it' and 'turning the other cheek' vs. the idea of we ourselves being the instruments and vessels of ‘doing justice, loving mercy, and walking humbly’ Spiritual Law vs. Natural Law the moral obligation and responsibility we have: to live up to, and to fulfill, the ideas of Natural Law (ie: that all people are equal) “That's Why I Keep Keeping On” the song that closes this episode, is on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/56tos1dnAg5wvJmtREv9yC Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/thats-why-i-keep-keeping-on/1493576062 and other streaming and music download marketplaces The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/116-preamble-series-2of6-establish-justice Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Programming Note: starting next week, we’ll begin releasing episodes on Wednesdays (instead of Tuesdays) NOTE for anyone listening in the future who won't know what "the fly" is that we're talking about. On 10/7/20, during the Vice Presidential debate, a fly landed on Mike Pence's hair and stayed there for 2 minutes and 9 seconds while everyone watching went nuts on social media. Jokes about: flies on s***, on corpses, on being a sign of the devil, and more. It was probably a ‘you had to be there’ moment, but trust us, it was a hoot. Just another absurdity in the year that is/was 2020. a weird source of stress-relief for Siena how the Preamble to the Constitution can help you flatten the COVID curve: reciting the Preamble takes about 20 seconds (the recommended time to scrub with soap, in order to wash your hands effectively) E Pluribus Unum = Out of Many, One the beautiful and amazing diversity of We The People the precious thing we all have in common, which is the desire to live a fulfilled life why “just be yourself” can make you feel worse how tension between things is at the heart of everything “Please Believe” the song that closes this episode, is on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/5ED4LF4jiqQhWZeJwK5FvB Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/please-believe/1466673581 and other streaming and music download marketplaces The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/115-preamble-1of6-a-more-perfect-union Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

Times have been scary lately, no? In this episode, we talk about fear. Siena gives a helpful definition of fear Toast preaches a 15-second sermon 😉 about Life being non-binary What Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez said about fear vs. courage Five truths about fear The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/114-on-fear Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

How the pandemic has changed our relationship to relationships. Topics include: the thing that makes your life good, or not emotions and experiences that surface after a death friends and family-of-friends, who have passed away from COVID-19 Siena’s friend on Oahu who passed away from COVID-19 feeling newly wealthy: in appreciation, relationships, memories, insights, and depth of feeling and experience and more The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/113-relationships-in-the-age-of-covid Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We share a couple personal stories before going into the main topic in this one. Links to the playlists that we mention: 🇺🇸 #Resist: Protest Songs for We The People Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/resist-protest-songs-for-we-the-people/pl.u-vB9DsLoEV5 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2mwGy92ThBeN8L1ZAkjEjs?si=4bbujy9jQv6TrwcfyLMq4Q 🍅 Fried Green Tomatoes: Real Sounds from Imaginary Whistle Stop Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/fried-green-tomatoes-real-sounds-from-imaginary-whistle/pl.u-YMv0tJaWAM Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3xXVGHXuxAh7BF0lclPpaD?si=anCCfocLRYqWbtsrY9tMXQ The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/112-entertainment-in-the-age-of-covid Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com

We continue our discussion based on the book "First, We Make The Beast Beautiful: a new journey through anxiety," by Sarah Wilson. We cover topics like: the benefits of being an anxious type the underlying root cause of anxiety what Sarah Wilson calls the “Something Else,” and that thing that we feel is missing why we develop anxious habits, trying to find the "missing thing" the paradoxical, but healthier, ways to address the “missing feeling” apps we've used and like (or don't like) for help with a meditation practice (Insight Timer vs. Calm vs. Headspace vs. Waking Up) how allowing yourself too many options increases your anxiety why art is such a crucial and helpful technology for dealing with anxiety The blog post for this episode is at: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/111-on-anxiety-2of2 Join the email list at https://sienaandtoast.com/emailsignup –––– Our intention has always been to uplift, entertain, and encourage people, especially fellow LGBTQers and progressive allies around the world, ever since we first started podcasting in 2007. Over the years, we’ve continued to get messages from listeners who’ve shared how it’s helped them through difficult times, like coming out, rejection from family, dealing with religion, or living in the closet, helping them feel more understood, less alone, and just kept them going, reminding them and showing them, that life is worthwhile. That’s exactly why we do it. We managed to self-finance the podcast since 2007. For 13 years! But now, we’re extending an invitation, and a way for you, the listener, to play a part in supporting it. See all kinds of ways to support the pod at https://sienaandtoast.com/contribute Thank you for your consideration. And if you do decide to contribute, thank you for that! Rate and review the pod at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/siena-and-toast/id100577843 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sienaandtoast.substack.com