Kakos Industries

in which we all take a moment to remember our mortality, we hear from several grieving parties, Yule is recapped, we learn something valuable, and Gulli Gulch Ravine “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear are the bubbles rushing by your mask. Hello, and welcome to the Kakos […]

We’re moving to a monthly schedule. Please remember to fill in our survey and visit our Patreon. Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries shareholders. My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. If you don’t, then the tinfoil is working. Kakos Industries is moving to […]

in which we are introduced to the Evil Measure, the Festival of Cold is recapped, plans are made for Yule, you get a headache, and something terrible happens. TW: Physical Violence. Transcription: What you are about to hear is just lip smacking for like 20 minutes. Hello and welcome to the Kakos Industries corporate shareholder […]

Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. If you don’t believe the cover story, then I am the dark puppeteer orchestrating your entire existence. To start with, I would like to remind you that our survey is still […]

in which Black Friday is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Cold, we learn about ancient sexts, there is a change in the winds, the Cult of Ohh Ahh pick a few herbs, and a doodle of some sort “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Transcription: What you are about to hear should not be […]

in which Halloween is recapped in a little more detail, the Festival of Anti-Celebration is in full swing, preparations are made for Black Friday, we learn about the Decennial Record, The Division of Erotic Experiences is born, and Handful of Mud McKenzie “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Featuring Mike Rugnetta of PBS Idea Channel. Do Evil […]

Today’s episode features Mike Rugnetta of PBS Idea Channel and the Reasonably Sound Podcast! Find him on Twitter @MikeRugnetta. Also, don’t forget about our survey! Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. We have a special treat […]

in which the Halloween festivities are underway, preparations are made for not celebrating at a later date, Hailey wears a Tiara, Melantha wears something, Helena bums us out, something about potatoes, some fingers go places, Corin is nearly squished to death, and Bavaria Fringe “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are […]

in which the Cult of Ohh Ahh makes an appearance, the Celebration of Books is recapped, preparations are made for Halloween, Corin gets some heartfelt advice, Kimmie finds something new to do, and Penny Lobe “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawin. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear may make your clothes feel tight. […]

New rewards over at kakosindustries.com/patreon! Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. I wanted to share with you some quick announcements. I have done some reorganization on the Patreon. I have added an enticing $2 pledge level […]

in which closets are cleaned out, you hurt in the thinky place, you had a weird nap, you get ready to read a lot of books, Corin stumbles into a minefield, and Colin Leaf “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear is reminiscent of your days selling salt […]

in which you care for a delicate plant, the Festival of Fertility is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Somnambulation, the renegade sex toy has gone full-on cult leader, Kakos Industries introduces a new girl group, we hear something we probably shouldn’t, you are reminded to do your kegels, and Morton Thyme “wins” […]

Please support our Patreon! KakosIndustries.com/Patreon Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. If you don’t believe the cover story, then I am a humble employee of Kakos Industries charged with taking the blame for everything that goes […]

in which the CEO Festival and Festival of the Dance are recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Fertility, Kimmie sets a record, we hear an annoying noise, and Tiptoes Poe “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawin. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear may prepare you for something terrible. Hello and welcome […]

In which your arms get tired, Corin plays some audio files, Kimmie gathers a crowd, the renegade sex toy keeps on keepin’ on, and a dot “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear is. Hello and welcome to the Kakos Industries corporate shareholder announcements. As always, I am […]

Today’s episode features Philip Haldiman, who played Denny in the cult movie The Room. Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. If you don’t, then I am obviously paid to keep you from catching wise to the […]

in which we hear a loud thumping, you no longer feel compelled to feel anything, you did some things at Evil Con, preparations are made for The CEO Festival, you hear some incendiary political speech, things get real boring, and then things get real messy. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear […]

Scapegoat Conrad Miszuk was interviewed on The Naked Diner. Check it out here! Transcript: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. It’s still too early as of this recording to know if we’ve made our $400 Patreon goal, […]

in which Corin goes totally off-script, the Celebration of Self Love is not recounted, you get a vague notion for what Evil Con 2016 might look like, you hear some things you probably shouldn’t, and Gavin “The Wrecking Ball” Murray “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear is […]

Check out our YouTube Channel to see the #FanFucktion winners! Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. We made our #FanFucktion goal! If you head over to our youtube channel, Youtube.com/kakosindustries, you can find the first three […]

in which you feel some things, you are still on the lookout for dolls, the Festival of Quiet Evils is recapped, preparations are made for the Celebration of Self Love, we hear from an old friend, and Tilda Meepmeep “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear is hot […]

We made our #fanfucktion goal! Also, Conrad appears on the new episode of Ars Paradoxica (arsparadoxica.com)! Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. Thanks to your generosity, we made our #FanFucktion goal of $400 for this month on […]

in which you are visited by an unwelcome presence, some robots do what they do, you test out a new app, preparations are made for things to get quiet, Tonia Wilson is spotlighted, Corin complains, a giant falls, and A. D. “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear […]

in which the Nudity Festival cum Ultra Nudity Festival cum Dark Mega Nudity Festival is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Innovation, the renegade sex toy had drawn a following, the second Shareholders’ Brawl is recapped, Kimmie and Maggie share a strained greeting, shit gets regal, and Dimple Deblinski “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. […]

in which you feel a pinch on your ear, the Water and Earth Festivals are recapped, preparations are made to get really hairy everywhere, Wyoming becomes more promiscuous, you beg for some vitamin D, Corin finds a board game he’s been missing, and Anaya Namaya “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you […]

in which nothing bad happens, Kakos Industries takes a much needed break, you answer a phone call, we hear about some tubers, Corin rides a rollercoaster, we prepare to look deep underwater and deep within ourselves, something regal happens, Corin talks like a pirate, and Molly Bloomth “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: […]

in which continuing the war becomes difficult, The Blood Sacrifice to Literally Any Deity that’s Listening or In the Neighborhood is recapped, preparations are made for the Agriculture Festival and the Festival of Doom, we get filled in on recent events regarding Kiarawa, Soundman Steven gets harder, and Dudley Abednigo “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do […]

in which Kiarawa’s forces are just outside, the Celebration of Self Pity is replaced, preparations are made for The Blood Sacrifice to Literally Any Deity that’s Listening or In the Neighborhood, the Darkest Universe is attempted once again, some dirty, sexy things happen that make everyone uncomfortable, and contact is made with a long lost […]

in which the crew is still in Junior’ Lair, your feet feel tingly, the Celebration of Ass goes off without a hitch, Kiarawa puts on her own celebrations above, Brosephus is rescued, and a hunk of metal drags itself into the cave. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear is sound of […]

in which a grand battle is recapped, dragons or something, Corin counts his supporters, the Festival of Everything is Okay, We Promise is recapped, preparations are made for the Celebration of Oh Hell, Who Gives a Shit, we have no idea who “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing, and the rebel gets rebranded. Do Evil Better. Transcription: […]

TL;DL Check out our Patreon! Transcription: Hello, Kakos Industries Shareholders! My name is Conrad Miszuk, and if you believe the cover story, then I am the creator of Kakos Industries. I’ve been making Kakos Industries for over two years now. We’ve made some incredible progress in that time. There are now thousands of you listening […]

in which Corin and his supporters have taken refuge in a deep part of Kakos Industries, we hear from one of Kakos Industries’ more colorful residents, the Automobile Celebration is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Everything is Okay, We Promise, and somebody’s life is probably ruined. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you […]

in which Corin wishes you a happy New Year, Yule and the New Year’s celebrations are recapped, preparations are made for the Automobile Celebration, Corin gets in with a group of youths, there are new developments in space, your birth control gets better, and William McGillicuddy “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What […]

in which Corin negotiates for the release of the Sudodilatese, the Festival of Cloud Watching goes is recapped, preparations are made for Yule and New Year’s, Eatin’ Slime gets a taste test, Corin and Belladonnica have a meeting, and Hamilton Scone “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear […]

in which Corin is STILL a captive, Black Friday is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Cloud Watching, Corin negotiates for the release of some captives, some really weird details come to light, and Benny The Pussy Master “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear may […]

in which Corin is restrained, you smell something burning, the festival of Anti-Celebration begins, preparations are made for Black Friday, progress is made with Kakos Tower, there is news about delicacies coming from Hell, and Kareem Tompkins “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear may legally change your […]

in which your trip has not yet ended, Corin’s pain is hilarious, the Halloween celebration is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of Anti-Celebration, the renegade sex toy is making progress, another floor of Kakos Tower is reclaimed, and Jeffrey Bannerjee “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to […]

in which Kakos Industries gets reorganized, you get a new car stereo, the Celebration of Books is recapped, preparations for Halloween are made, Melantha and Corin share a mysterious moment, Yipdoodie no longer exists, Hell gets a hand, and Paul Rathjen “wins”the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: What you are about to hear may […]

Please enjoy this intercepted broadcast from one of our competitors. Transcription: What you’re about to hear is super cute and lots of fun. Hiiiiiiiiiiiii ARBABARBABARBAR shareholders! It’s me, Hailey Solomonari, acting CEO. We got word that we would have to do more announcements like this, and Melantha isn’t feeling very well- Melantha: Uggh! Hailey! -so […]

in which a mysterious festival occurs, Corin takes a less hands-on approach to management, the Festival of Somnambulation is recapped, preparations are made of the Celebration of Books, Belladonnica is still missing, Kimmie and Maggie dry out another floor of Kakos Tower, the new sex toy digs deeper, Dr. Dunkelwissen steals some hair and spit, […]

in which Corin is having a bad day, you upset a large portion of toads worldwide, the Festival of Fertility is recapped, the Festival of Misery is also recapped, the Festival of Somnambulation is introduced, something is salvaged from Kakos Tower, the Division of Sexual Experimentation has news, you taste something strange, everything goes quiet, […]

in which Soundman Steven is rewarded for his sacrifices, the Festival of the Dance is wrapped up neatly for a change, preparations are made for the Festival of Fertility and a new festival, DMB is still MIA, Denny still exists, Paul Tubb puts his pants back on, the Division of Sexual Experimentation is about to […]

in which you put your ear to a potted plant, the CEO festival is recapped, preparations are made for the Festival of the Dance, Corin patches things up with Brosephus, the Division of Sexual Experimentation is announced, Hell gets even weirder, the Division of Gleep Glorp has important news, and Paula Crumb “wins” the Ruin-A-Life […]

in which the Sexual Innovation Division has some interesting news, the Celebration of Self Love is recapped, preparations are made for the CEO Festival, the settlers in Hell ar doing better than expected, Kimmie and Maggie join the team at the Division of Uphill Battles, and Thomas the Genetically Modified Ape “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. […]

in which Corin discusses his path to wellness, a small fight is had between good friends, you eat something that makes you feel weird, a large fight between strangers is had, Evil Con is recapped, preparations are made for the Celebration of Self Love, and Bambi Porkle “wins” the Ruin-A-Life Drawing. Do Evil Better. Transcription: […]

in which several assassination attempts are thwarted, you feel a pleasant tingling, Brosephus confides in Corin, the Festival of Falling Down Because You’re Not Looking Where You’re Going, Dumbass goes super well, preparations are made for Evil Con 2015, an idea is given for an an Eviler news organization, Hell gets some visitors, and a […]

in which you feel a tingling in your brain, Corin gets personal, the technology festival exceeded everyone’s expectations, the Festival of Falling Down Because You’re Not Looking Where You’re Going, Dumbass is announced, the Division of Masculine Expression has news, the Sexual Innovation Division is trying really hard to make #FOMOOO happen, and Greg Googlymoogly […]

in which Corin is given a special assignment, you get a tickle in your throat, the UltraNudity Festival goes UltraOkay, preparations are made for the Technology Festival, Corin Deeth I offers some premature congratulations, Melantha attempts to turn the tables, we all learn the correct usage of the word “utilize”, and Fujiko Thompson “wins” the […]

in which a memorial is made, Dark Mother Belladonnica is punished, Melantha continues to fight her ownership of Kakos Industries stock, You hear a distinct buzzing sound, the Water Festival is unsurprising, the Earth festival is surprising, preparations are made for the UltraNudity Festival, animals with synthetic furs are developed, our precise level of nastiness […]

Kakos Industries has intercepted a broadcast of interest. Please listen at your own risk. Transcription: What you are about to experience may singe the edges of your beating heart. Good evening, shareholders. This is Melantha Murther, CEO of (NOISE). I don’t normally do announcements like this, as you know, but I was notified earlier today […]