Horror Movie Talk

Synopsis Terrifier 3 is a sweet hallmark-esk Christmas movie about a middle-class family working through the stress of the holiday season. Mom is bored with her suburban lifestyle and Dad is constantly tired at work because he keeps being woken up by sweet little Suzy who has crazy dreams when she has too much sugar before bed. Oh yeah, and a clown dressed as Santa possessed by the devil wielding an ax is there as well. In reality, terrifier 3 is the continuation of the Terrifier franchise featuring Art the Killer Clown. After resurrecting once again Art meets up with an old friend and begins a brand new killing spree. With Christmas just days away the hustle and bustle of holiday commercialism does a fantastic job of masking the fact that there is an eclectic killer dressed in bizarre mime clothes killing multiple people everywhere he goes in gruesome and disturbing ways. It’s clear that Art is dead set on finding new and inventive ways to kill people and in this installment Art really goes for new territory. He’s like the Luis and Clark of killing, he’s just gotta map out that new lush land. Sienna from the last movie is back as well and trying to recover from her trauma but doesn’t really have time to do that since she is about to experience trauma anew. Review Terrifier 3, terrifier 3. What more can be said about Terrifier 3 that has not yet been said. My utterance is yet a meager portion. For the true understanding lies in the viewing experience. I will never be able to explain this movie to you in a way that will give you the visceral experience I had in the theater watching flesh rip from bone. Maybe herein lies the perfect word to describe Terrifier 3. It separates. Skin from muscle. A lower jaw from the upper jaw. Left butt cheek from right butt cheek. Every way in which a body can be torn asunder, Terrifier 3 will separate. Separate the boys from the men. The weaklings from the strong. The feeble from the stable. And the queasy from the iron stomachs. I had a great time watching this disgusting movie. However, I won’t pretend it was a perfect movie. It was pretty predictable. I knew Art would kill people and that Art killing people would take up a significant portion of the runtime, most of which doesn’t add much to the actual plot. But hey, that’s just terrifier baby. Score 8/10

Synopsis A woman called Darling is hired to house sit at a fancy, old, big haunted house in the middle of New York City. As she spends her days alone, she figures out the house’s ghostly past and slowly succumbs to the madness of the house’s, and her own, lore. Review I first watched this movie back in high school and thought it was the epitome of slow burn, creepy, woman-goes-insane horror films. As I have a lot more horror movie experience now (and film experience in general), I realize that this is basically a rip off of Repulsion (1965). This isn’t to say it’s a bad movie by any means; the many jump cuts and jump scares keep you on your toes (it could be argued that there are too many of these quick scenes), and there is an overall eerie feeling that is hard to shake once you finish. But, it’s not the best movie of a woman going insane. There are plenty of those, horror or not, that execute the trope a lot better than this one did. The first act is boring as all hell but the second and third ramp up the action just a little bit, and the main actress Lauren Ashely Carter is a very good Kristen Stewart type. Contrary to how I sound, I do enjoy this film, just not as much as I did when I was 16. Score 6/10

Synopsis The Devil’s Rejects is about three people that embody what Democrats imagine Trump voters to be. In this sequel to House of 1000 Corpses, the Firefly family are on the run from the law. Along the way, they wantonly murder and torture innocent victims for their enjoyment. And that’s pretty much it really. No themes are explored. No lessons are learned. It’s mostly just everyone yelling “fuck you” to each other for an hour and 46 mins. Review of The Devil’s Rejects Is it “good”? No. It’s not good, But I will say it’s about 50% better than House of 1000 Corpses. It has a higher budget, is more artistically shot, and has a few ok moments in it. However, like House, this is really a big bag of nothing. It’s just like watching pigs wallow in the mire. Instead of pigs, it’s annoying and psychotic white trash, and instead of a mire, it’s gore and swearing. I tapped into my Mormon brain while watching this, and thought to myself, they are so disrespectful. It literally took me 5 hours to get through between the forced ad breaks, and my self imposed breaks. It’s just a slog and doesn’t really have any redeeming artistic merit to justify itself. Anything really interesting is stolen from another movie that did it better. Why Patrons do you do this to us? Why?  Score 3/10

Synopsis The Substance follows Elisabeth Sparkle, a big time celebrity host of an 80s workout tv show, who turns 50 years old and gets sacked in pursuit of someone younger and “hotter” to host the show. After getting in a car crash, she meets a mysterious stranger who tells her about the substance, which can create a younger, more beautiful, better version of yourself. Lizzie decides to go through with this, and the results change the rest of her life forever. Review This movie is a doozy. It’s fun and stylistic and seemingly poses an important question about misogyny in Hollywood, women not being allowed to age, the emphasis on beauty no matter how painful, etc, but the commentary falls flat. In Coralie Fargeat’s first film, Revenge, I noticed a very similar occurrence. There is potential in The Substance for important discussions, but it turns into an extremist monster-esque chaotic clusterfuck instead of really giving us some answers, or at least worthwhile commentary. The film is more concerned about style than substance (which is ironic because of the name) and I think that works in its favor in certain areas, and works against it in others. Overall it is interesting, definitely a new trope and the setup is promising, there are some incredible shots and set dressings and the color scheme is captivating. Demi Moore gives an all time performance. There are some really great scenes but ultimately the execution of this film and its message or lack thereof is not where I’d want it to be or expect it to be. Score 6/10

Synopsis While on vacation, or holiday as the British say, the American expat Dalton family meet another family of three headed by Paddy (James McAvoy). After they return to their flat in London, they receive a postcard from Paddy inviting them to spend a long weekend with their family at their farm in the Western countryside of Britain. Initially hesitant, since they barely know each other, the Daltons decide to go. As the weekend progresses, Paddy’s jovial irreverent demeanor reveals a more overbearing and nefarious personality underneath. By the time they find out how much danger they are in, it’s too late, and the Daltons fight to escape. If you think that that synopsis is too spoilery, you should see the trailer! Review of Speak No Evil (2024) As many of you know, this is a remake of a Danish film of the same name that only came out two years ago. I was the only one here that hasn’t seen it before my viewing, so my experience with it is different from Max and Sydney. I think it gives my review less of a bias. I think this movie is really good. On it’s own it is a very compelling thriller that is well crafted and acted. James McAvoy really shines as Paddy, and perfectly strikes the tone of an overbearing line pusher with a barely contained rage underneath. Scoot McNairy and Mackenzie Davis playing ben and Louise act as the perfect foil to Paddy and each others characters.  I found the set up and character development throughout the film to be rich and interesting, and it made the awkward and disturbing situations more interesting because it felt very real. The fans of the original will have a real beef with the ending, which is way more Hollywood and safe for a thriller, but for me it still works great. Score 8/10

Synopsis Beetlejuice Beetlejuice picks up thirty years after the events of the first film, with Delia Deetz being a famous artist, Lydia having her own ghost adventures type show, and her daughter Astrid being a goth angsty teen. The Deetz family has to deal with the sudden loss of the paternal figure in their lives while also grappling with their own individual battles. When Astrid, played by Jenna Ortega, gets stuck in the afterlife and Beetlejuice’s ex wife Delores, played by Monica Belluci, starts stalking him, Lydia makes another glorious deal with Beetlejuice to save her daughter and get Monica Belluci off Beetlejuice’s back. Chaos ensues. Review As I’ve said many times, I am not a big fan of sequels. I was not very excited to see this, since it is a sequel so many years after the first I figured it was another cash grab. That very well might be true, but I unexpectedly had a really fun time watching this. Michael Keaton soars as the titular character once again, and with this star studded cast, it is almost a perfect comedy. Catherine O’Hara remains one of the funniest women who has ever set foot on screen, and the welcome additions of Willem Dafoe and Justin Theroux also put in the work to get some laughs. A few complaints are that I think I liked the practical effects and primitive CGI in the first movie a lot better than I liked the new CGI stuff in this one. It looked corny and even though this movie isn’t geared towards kids, the sandworm looked like something out of a Nick Jr. tv show. Also, there were a lot of moving parts that could have been cut down to one A and one B plot. All in all it is a very fun, new take on the Beetlejuice universe, and I loved it. Score 8/10

Synopsis Incantation is a classic tale of three ghost hunters who travel to a secluded village in order to learn more about their spooky traditions and gather footage for their Youtube channel. However their journey quickly goes from silly to incredibly horrifying. Years later, the curse of the mother Buddha deity still remains. Review of Incantation Incantation is one of my favorite horror movies in recent years. Its kind of a hidden gem with no theatrical release. A lot of people in the horror community talk about wanting to find a movie that is actually scary and I really do think that this is it. I don’t want to hype it up too much for those of you who haven’t seen it because I don’t want you to have unrealistic expectations, but when I watched this movie for the first time I had to pause it and turn on the lights because I got too scared. It pulls the viewer into the story making you apart of the nightmare and for that this feels more like an experience than a movie. It wastes no time and gets scary within 5 minutes. If you haven’t checked it out please do yourself a favor and watch Incantation. Score: 10/10

Synopsis On a live broadcast during Halloween on sweeps week in 1977, a failing late night talk show starring Jack Delroy (played by David Dastmalchian) interviews a cult survivor supposedly possessed by a demon. The audience is amazed and horrified by the demonstration and Delroy soon finds himself out of his depth. But instead of heeding caution, he doubles down on the bit to save his show from cancellation to disastrous consequence. Review of Late Night with the Devil This movie has a great premise. What if you showed Regan from The Exorcist on a talkshow next to obvious fake psychics and debunkers that often appeared on late night. The talk show is a format that everyone is familiar with, and even the guests previous to the possessed little girl should all be recognizable stand ins for real life talk show guests such as Uri Gellar and James Randi. The biggest setback is that the writing and acting a little too on-the-nose, and it ends up feeling a little cringe. In what could be a super compelling and real-feeling found footage film, the artificiality really pulls you out of the moment and you definitely feel like you are watching a movie. It’s like when you see a movie or show about a stand up comedian, and the actor isn’t able to be convincingly funny but is met with uproarious laughter from the fake audience. It’s a type of uncanny valley that is created when actors aren’t able to match the charisma and timing of a seasoned professional, in this case, talk show host. They made the genius move to explain that this is a failing talk show, so Jack Delroy’s wooden presence and indiscernible personality actually sells the “why”. That being said, this movie does have some good bones. The plot structure and utilization of the talk show format is great. It lends a new backdrop to the horror cliche of demonic possession. The tension ramps up convincingly, and the inevitable trainwreck that is foreshadowed is satisfying. I just wish they would have aimed for more realism in the writing and acting. Score 6/10

Synopsis Alien Romulus is about a young woman named Rain, and her Robot Brother Andy are stuck on a slave labor planet that never sees sunlight. On the day they finish their slave sentences and have technically earned their freedom, they are told that another 6 years have randomly been added. This is incredibly devastating for Rain, but not so much for Andy cause he is a robot and has zero emotion the whole movie. Anyways, Rain’s friends convince her and Andy to join them in a dangerous plan to hijack an abandoned ship in their planet’s orbit and use it to travel to a free planet. Upon entering space and eventually the abandoned ship, things start to become more and more eerie. Dead bodies are everywhere, gravity randomly turns off and back on, and the ship is in ruins. The deeper into the ship the group travels, the more Alien they experience, and everyone gets just a bit more Romulus than they were hoping for.  Review of Alien Romulus Alien Romulus is a really good-looking sci-fi with great visuals and a tense atmosphere. The vibes on the ship feel creepy, and there are enough interesting moments to keep me entertained for the most part. My trouble with this movie is that we dont really care about any of the characters except for Rain and Andy, and there are like 5 other characters. The movie drops little hints about these people’s lives like “Oh this person is pregnant” or “This person’s mom was killed by a robot” but it never really explores these things and in the end, I just didn’t care about any of these people. The movie also doesn’t really add anything all that new to the franchise. The ending does have something new which I won’t spoil, and I actually found pretty cool, but for the most part, the movie kept being like “hey! Remember face huggers!” or “hey! Remember the chest-bursting scene from the original! What if we did that again! Cool right?” and that was just starting to get a little boring. The movie is 2 hours long and while I was pretty engaged with it for the first half, the second half dragged a little for me. Its not a terrible movie, but I’m gonna give it a score of  Score 5/10

If I had a nickel for every horror movie starring a main cast member of Euphoria released this year, I’d have three nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened thrice. This episode we talk about Cuckoo a new limited release horror movie out now in theaters written and directed by Tilman Singer. Stay tuned whores Synopsis This movie is about an American girl dragged along to a resort in the Bavarian Alps. Something seems off about the way that random guests barf all the time, and how time loops back on itself for some reason. I mean, it could drive a person Cuckoo! Review of Cuckoo This one has a lot going on in it, and in the best of ways feels like an X-files episode. It’s hard to guess where it’s going. It was really twisty turny. I mean they usually do twisty turny, but this one is REALLY twisty turny. Hunter Schafer plays the protagonist Gretchen, the moody teen overcoming a recent tragedy, and she does really well in this. Her performance is helped with some of the most convincing bruise and cut makeup as she is pretty beat up through the majority of the film The scares are few, but the tension is high. Singer does a good job at maintaining the feeling of being trapped in various ways. First as being a teen dragged along with the family, then as a patient in a hospital, then as a prisoner almost of the resort. Dan Stevens also is great as the smarmy resort owner bad guy. It is engaging throughout, but starts to get a little sketchy towards the end where it feels like it has to wedge in all the necessary exposition. I’m still confused about why some stuff happened at the end and felt like there were still some loose ends with explaining the “Cuckoo”, but overall it felt satisfying. Score 8/10

Synopsis Trap is a movie that follows Cooper, a seemingly normal dad who takes his daughter, Riley, to her favorite artist’s concert. Once there, Cooper is told that the whole concert is a trap to catch a serial killer who is colloquially called The Butcher. Plot twist (but not a plot twist because it is given in the trailer) is that Cooper is the Butcher, and he needs to find a way to escape the heavily guarded arena without getting caught. Review I was very excited for this movie, I thought the trailer looked awesome and M Night has some good hits (The Visit, Signs, obviously The Sixth Sense). After about fifteen minutes of pure concert, I was completely checked out. This movie is boring, it is unfulfilling, the trailer gives away most of the interesting plot. Even though a serial killer trying not to get caught while surrounded by SWAT teams and the FBI is really high stakes, the movie doesn’t make that apparent whatsoever. The classic ending “twist” that M Night always does falls flat in this one, and at that point I was honestly just waiting for it to be over. Josh Hartnett is an impeccable actor, but with this crappy script he didn’t have much to work with, and most of the other actors are not up to his caliber. I didn’t care much for the characters and overall it was just boring. A complete drag. The only character that was redeemable was the vendor played by Jonathan Langdon, his performance solidified by the fun post credit scene. And when Josh Harnett took his shirt off, it gained a point back in my book. I can see this getting mixed reviews, like most of M Night’s films, and I am a part of the dislike club. Score 3/10

Synopsis Oddity is a morality tale about why you shouldn’t cross witchy women. When a blind woman’s sister is murdered in a remote country estate, she uses her arcane knowledge and abilities to uncover the true identity of her murderer. Review of Oddity I really liked this movie. It came under the radar and we almost didn’t review it, but I’m glad we did, because I think I actually did like this one better than Longlegs. The film starts out basically with a prologue of what you see in the trailer, and acts as a really taut short film. A Woman answers the door to a creepy one eyed man that says that she’s not safe inside and needs to let him in. We are given just enough information to make this situation plausible and build dread. That is a common thread through the film. We are given just enough information to constantly be uneasy and uncertain throughout the whole film. It really is structurally impressive, plot-wise. There isn’t a ton of character development, but there is a constant stream of revelations and situations that keep the film engaging.  One criticism may be that there isn’t much of an emotional element in the film, the characters all seem very cold. However, each character has enough of a personality and backstory to make their interactions and decisions interesting. There are several moments and lines that had me laughing out loud, including the ending. There were also some really effective jumpscares. On the surface, this movie utilizes a lot of tropes that are crutches for a lot of supernatural horror movies. The spooky dark house. The strange sounds in the darkness. Stretches of tense silence leading up to jump scares. But for some reason, instead of rolling my eyes, I was truly engaged with this movie. I think it’s because all of the reality-based elements seem plausible, and all the supernatural elements seem interesting or novel.  I think it’s a great movie, and honestly I don’t have any real criticisms or anything that bothered me with it.  Score  10/10 Interview with Amber Victoria from The Skeleton Key Odditorium Bryce: Today, we welcome Amber Victoria, owner and operator of the Skeleton Key Auditorium Museum and Oddity Shop in Portland, Oregon. It’s a retail shop that specializes in oddities, antiques, curiosities, Gothic art, gifts, crystals, tarot cards, dolls, metaphysical items, clothing, and souvenirs. The auditorium is a historical museum designed to provide intrigue and a better understanding of the human experience through exploring the strange, unusual, and gloomy characteristics of our history. It was recently voted as the runner-up for Portland’s Best Museum, just underneath the multi-million dollar Portland Art Museum and OMSI. So, it’s pretty high praise for a museum. Anyways, welcome, Amber Victoria! Sydney: Welcome! Amber: Hello. Yay, thank you. Thank you for having me. Bryce: So, Amber, why don’t you tell us a little bit about how you got started? What’s the story with you and the Skeleton Key? Amber: Well, it kind of started almost 10 years ago. I’ve always loved old things and was more of a Ren fair kind of person. I was doing immersion events and collected a lot of odd things. Eventually, I started collecting too much stuff, so I began selling items at Curiosities Vintage Mall about nine years ago. It just evolved from there. People really liked my odd things, so I decided to open a brick-and-mortar shop in 2020. And here we are, still doing it. Bryce: So, when did you open the brick-and-mortar shop? Amber: I opened it in 2020 on Belmont. It was a small oddity shop, about 600 square feet. When the lease was up, we moved downtown, and I brought my partner along. We decided to open a museum because there was so much knowledge and so many items. People were always asking questions, and we wanted to educate and preserve these items in a fun, interactive space full of oddities. Bryce: Awesome. When you opened the brick-and-mortar, how much did you have to augment your existing collection to open the store? Amber: I literally brought everything from my house. I had been planning it for a long time. I would find things and think, “This is going to be the register table,” and it would sit in my garage until the moment was right. The pandemic really pushed me to do it because I was working in the service industry, and we lost that opportunity in 2020. So, I crowdfunded and finally opened up my shop. Bryce: That’s awesome. It must have been hard to start a business during the pandemic. Sydney: That’s so exciting. Amber: It was pretty brave, a bold move, but at that time, you were thinking, “I might just die, so why not?” Sydney: Yeah, exactly. Bryce: Nice. So, if someone comes into the shop—actually, my first question is, you said you watched “Oddity” last night. What’s your impression of the movie, and how accurate is it for an oddities dealer? Amber: I was

Synopsis Grave Encounters follows a Zak Baggins/Ghost Adventures type crew while they film their first season of the titular show, constantly in search of new scares and not afraid to create their own for movie magic. They go to stay at an abandoned mental hospital in Maryland, where they get locked inside for 8 hours in hopes of getting some good footage and getting the hell out of there. Not expecting to see anything out of the ordinary, they are in for more than they bargained for. Review of Grave Encounters This is a very fun movie. There’s plenty of things to laugh at throughout to relieve you from the unexpected jump scares of ghouls and goblins. It’s not as serious and dreadful as something like Paranormal Activity, but it’s not trying to be something like that. They don’t waste much time getting into the nitty gritty of how haunted the asylum really is. The pacing is good and the scares are effective even on a repeat watch. The main problem I have with this movie is that the end drags on for a bit too long, it could have been a little tighter in the beginning and in the end, but the meat in the middle works. All in all, it is a good scary movie, it’s a fun time, but as you watch it multiple times it gets less effective. Score 7/10

Synopsis In Longlegs, the FBI is on a manhunt for a mysterious killer named Longlegs, who somehow convinces whole families to kill each other and themselves. Agent Lee Harker is on the case and she is quickly shown to have psychic powers, or at least half psychic powers which may be useful to the FBI. The details of the murders and the clues left behind are creepy, and Agent Harker must first learn to piece together her past before she can finally piece together this case.  Review of Longlegs Longlegs is a long-awaited horror movie that gained interest through vague and ominous marketing, as well as keeping the plot of the movie close to the chest. I had absolutely no idea what this movie was about going in, but I had high expectations simply because so many people were talking about this movie. The movie is very well shot and the atmosphere is creepy the entire time. It has a similar feel to movies like Silence of the Lambs and Seven but is maybe a little slower than both of those movies. Any time Nicholas Cage is on screen I am having a great time. His character feels interesting and is visually scary to look at with his makeup, and his voice gave me chills. My only complaints about this movie was that some of the dialogue felt super cheezy, especially when they are talking about the devil and worshiping satan. I think they could have maybe come up with something a tad more original. In my opinion, worshiping the devil doesn’t really feel scary, it just feels a little bit cringe. The movie was also a little slow and probably could have benefited from a few more scary scenes in the middle of the movie, but other than that it was pretty fun Score 8/10

Synopsis Maxxxine follows the titular character as she attempts to leave the porno film industry and enter into mainstream Hollywood. She’s haunted by her past and is traumatized by the events of X that happened 6 years previously where she was the sole survivor of a homicidal elderly couple (spoilers). While struggling with the trauma and the difficulties of navigating Hollywood, several of her friends and acquaintances are murdered by a mysterious figure with black leather gloves. Will she achieve hollywood stardom? Will she be charged for murdering an elderly woman in Texas? Will she foil Dr Claw’s plan to use a missile silo to launch a missile to destroy Metro City? Watch Maxxxine or skip forward to our spoiler section to find out. Review of Maxxine Maxxine continues the exploitation genre throwback vibe of X and Pearl, but this one is much less stylized, and frankly, less horror focused. It’s more of a thriller/horror that is about as close as you come to an American Giallo. Maxine is surrounded by colleagues and acquaintances, but the maximum extent of the character development for them is “gay”. They end up all being disposable fodder for the prototypical faceless Giallo villain. Maxxxine, as we’ve seen in X is super capable and driven, and it ends up being one of the pitfalls of the movie. She is such a bad bitch that you never really believe she is in danger. Therefore, there isn’t much of an arc in her character or the plot. It ends up being a waiting game to learn whodunnit. The cast is great, and includes Kevin Bacon doing an impression of Daniel Craig’s Cajun accent. Giancarlo Esposito plays a character that isn’t a rip off of Gus Fring, and there are other actors too. This film is a tribute to 80s cinema, and as such Ti West limited technology to that of the time period. It doesn’t really seem noticeable in terms of quality of the visuals, but there are some very visceral practical effects that 80s horror fans will love. It’s an enjoyable movie, and if you liked X and Pearl, this is a good capper, but for me it wasn’t as interesting as those films. Score 7/10

Synopsis 1408 is a film that follows Mike Enslin, played by John Cusack, a corny horror novelist who specializes in writing about the scariest, spookiest places he’s ever been. Although he spends a lot of time in “haunted” places, he has never seen any paranormal activity and does not believe in ghosts. He then receives a cryptic postcard from the Dolphin Hotel in New York City that states, “Don’t stay in 1408.” Intrigued by this gesture and not at all deterred, he goes against the wishes of the postcard and of the staff of the hotel and books the room, hoping to finally get scared. Review This is the ultimate sleeper pick. This movie is not very well known or well talked about in horror movie communities, to my knowledge anyway, and after a second viewing I firmly believe this is one of the best horror movies. The viewer is never bored, stuff happens so quickly and so often in this film that it was extremely difficult to take notes on it because I almost always missed something. The pacing is something to look up to, it keeps you engaged from the moment you turn it on to the moment it ends. It is scary and certainly anxiety inducing. This is a great adaptation of a Stephen King and even if you don’t love Stephen King, you will love this movie if you are a horror fan. There are not many problems with this movie. Sometimes the directing style is a bit dated and the acting can be a little slapstick at times, but it doesn’t fully take away from how good it is. It is definitely not perfect, but it is entertaining and quite dreadful. Score 8/10

Synopsis The Exorcism is about Farther Gabriel Amorth played by Russel Crowe, who…wait no sorry that’s the popes exorcist I keep getting confused. The exorcism is really about Anthony or Tony played by Russel Crowe who is a washed up actor who tries out for a leading role in an upcoming exorcism movie while attempting to overcome his serious drinking problem. With the loss of his wife, Tony sends his teenage daughter Lee to a catholic boarding school, but when she is kicked out for in her words “protesting” but in the words of the law “vandalism”, she returns home and the reunion is tense. When Tony lands the role as the exorcist in this new emotional drama in the format of a horror movie weird things start happening on and off set. Will Tony survive the making of this movie? Will his family survive his alcoholism? Will Russel Crowe be in another exorcism movie next year? Whose to say. Review of The Exorcism My review for the exorcism is that it is pretty much exactly what I expected it to be. Its a catholic horror movie about a demon who needs to be exorcised. The scares aren’t that interesting, and some of the jump scares are so loud and quickly cut that I literally didn’t even know what happening. It was just startling and gave me zero information about what was actually going on in the film. Russel Crowes acting was actually pretty good in my opinion, but I think his voice is so deep and gravelly that it could be that I just enjoyed listening to him talk. The other star of the movie for me was the director played by Adam Goldberg who delivers both the funniest lines in the movie and the most emotionally brutal lines. The rest of the cast is kind of whatever to me. My favorite part of the movie was how it demonstrated the exploitation of trauma in the film industry which was pretty sad to watch. My least favorite parts were anything dealing with the demon cause I didn’t even really get what was happening or why. Maybe this really was a drama cloaked as a horror movie after all. Score 4/10

https://youtu.be/lju9lJVRlGM Synopsis The film follows the lives of two women as they navigate an uncharted territory of human experience, exploring themes of desire, taboo, and the limits of societal norms. The narrative delves into the depths of physical and emotional extremes. It starts out in medias res with a young couple engaging in a love making session, after which, they enjoy a home cooked meal. However, the film quickly turns dark as they both develop food poisoning. Their bond remains strong and they struggle through sickness together powered by their love. Review Not since Skinamarink have I seen such a daring and controversial film push the boundaries of conventional filmmaking and audience tolerance. Unlike Skinamarink, 2 Girls 1 Cup lives up to the hype, andI felt engaged throughout the duration of the film. It’s not without it’s faults. I would have preferred more character development and I felt the pacing was too fast to digest on first viewing. The soundtrack at times felt like it was disconnected from the action on screen. I know a lot of films score against the tone of the film to great effect, such as in Tarantino films, but this one just felt out of place and overly maudlin. What I liked about the film was it’s unflinching portrayal of two lovers struggling through hardship together. It’s a film that will stay with me for some time, and I imagine I’ll revisit again in the future. Score 10/10

Who watches the watchers? We do! In this episode of Horror Movie Talk, we review the nepo baby Ishana Night Shyamalan’s new horror movie The Watchers. Should you watch it? Watch to find out. Synopsis The watchers is the first feature length film by writer/director Ishana Night Shyamalan, the daughter of M Night Shyamalan. Her previous work includes being a writer/director on her father’s Servant series on Apple TV+. In this film, Dakota Fanning plays Mina, an American expat in Ireland who is tasked with delivering a parrot. Along the way she gets lost in some weird woods from which there is no escape. There she finds a group of people that have also been stranded in the woods. They lead her into a solitary shelter in the middle of the forest and explain that they are to stand as display in a two way mirror for mysterious killer creatures that come out at night. As the days pass, Mina attempts to learn more about the woods to find an escape. Review of The Watchers The film sits currently at 32% on Rotten Tomatoes, and I can say that that seems pretty harsh. It’s not a terrible movie, but it’s not great either. As they say in the old country, The Shyamalan doesn’t fall far from the tree. This film suffers from some of the same on-the nose dialogue and an overreliance on exposition to tell the story. The set up is ripe for possibilities. Could it be a human zoo run by aliens or interdimensional travelers? Could it be an elaborate hallucination? Could it be a time loop? In the end, the explanation is a little more close to home and fantastical that science fiction, which was actually a welcome surprise. However, I still feel there was a lot of lost opportunity around hallucination, and shape shifting, which are both present in the story. The film was bought purportedly for 30 million, and hasn’t yet made back half of that in the box office. If you are wondering if it is worth it to see in the theaters, I think the litmus test is whether you thought it was worth it to see Old in the theaters. Score 5/10

Synopsis The Grudge 2004 is an Americanized version of the movie Ju-on, a Japanese franchise about a curse of resentment and anger. Both Ju-on and The Grudge are directed by Takashi Shimizu, and the Grudge is produced by (among others) Sam Raimi. The movie stars Sarah Michelle Gellar as Karen, an American who moved to Japan with her boyfriend to study nursing. While attending to her first in-home patient, Emma, who is an elderly woman with dementia, she realizes that there might be something dark lurking in the home. After some creepy occurrences, Karen has no choice but to dig deeper into the house’s history and the legends surrounding it.  Review The Grudge has interesting ghost lore, which isn’t too different from the way we view ghosts in America, but adds emphasis on reliving the violent past, which I think is fun and gives the viewer a bit more to latch onto as far as why the ghost exists. The ghost looks extremely creepy in most scenes, with a face that genuinely terrified me as a kid, even before I had seen the movie. Its mark on pop culture is undeniable. However, a part of me likes my memory of this movie more than the movie itself. Some of the scenes feel pretty copy and paste, especially the scenes about Karen trying to research the house and learn clues. Some of the scares came off as a bit goofy, which is fine, except that the tone of the movie is very heavy, so these silly-looking scares can feel a little out of place and unintentional. Still, the movie is good, in my opinion, and has a place within my mind that will never go away.  Score: 8/10

Synopsis Perfect Blue follows the story of Mima, a pop star who turns her life around to become an aspiring actress. As she goes deeper into her role on a crime thriller tv show, she realizes that someone might be stalking her. The line between reality and acting becomes thinner and thinner as the anxiety of fame and her potential stalker rise. Review This movie is impeccable. Director Satoshi Kon forces the viewer to descend into Mima’s madness by blurring the line between real and fantasy throughout the course of the film with quick cuts, disorienting scenes, and an overall sense of unknowingness. Making an anime horror film be this good, this widely received and revered is no easy feat, but Kon makes it look like a cake walk. This is one of my favorite movies of all time, and one of my favorite directors of all time. The sense of dread, doom, and anxiety get bigger and bigger until it all comes to a head at the end of the movie. It is emotional, thrilling, scary, and hard to follow, but that is what makes it perfect. Perfect blue. Get it. Haha Score 10/10

Synopsis Based on the 1976 novel by Anne Rice, Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles tells the autobiographical story of a Vampire named Louis de Pointe du Lac (played by Brad Pitt) being turned and taught by the vampire Lestat (Tom Cruise). They are just very good vampire friends and totally not gay. After becoming a vampire, Louis discovers he has great powers, and uses them to have the poutiest mouth and become as emo as possible. He makes a lot of friends along the way, including Kirsten Dunst playing a pedo’s dream, as well as Zorro. Review of Interview with the Vampire (1994) This is probably my favorite vampire movie, so I’m biased, but I still think it holds up. It focuses on the coolest part of the vampire stories, the vampires, and gets rid of the pesky humans. This is also probably one of my favorite roles of Tom Cruise. His playfulness and arrogance as Lestat carries the majority of the movie. Kirsten Dunst also puts in one of the greatest performances of her career as a convincing forty year old in a child’s body. Brad Pitt is the only one that upon rewatching becomes less interesting every reviewing. There’s really nothing for him to do other than pout and look pretty. But granted, he does that very well here. What the film does best is maintain a vibe of sexy morbidness. Seeing this in my youth, I was distracted by the boobs in this movie, and only now realize how extremely gay coded the film is. Louis’s alternating between reveling in being a vampire and being shamed by it really represented what it must have felt like to be gay in the early 90s. The director Neil Jordan had just come off of directing The Crying Game and was really at the peak of his powers. Looking at his IMDB page, it’s only been downhill from here. Stan Winton’s special effects and makeup is perfectly understated and makes the vampires seem otherworldly and the killings properly visceral. A lot of stars aligned with this film and I still think it stands the test of time. If you want to watch a bunch of sexy vampires almost kissing, this is the movie for you. Score 10/10

Synopsis A couple embarks on a journey across the country for their five year anniversary. After their car breaks down in the middle of nowhere Oregon, they have no choice but to stay in a cabin in the woods. When Ryan, played by Froy Gutierrez, runs back into town to grab something he forgot out of his car, Maya played by Madeline Petsch starts hearing and seeing strange things in the cabin, almost like someone else is in the house. Review of The Strangers Chapter 1 I really hated this movie. Like, really hated. I didn’t really know what to expect, but taking what didn’t work from the original and even at some points taking direct lines and situations from the original and cramming it into the already too long 90 minute run time was atrocious. I don’t know if I was just tired, but I almost fell asleep at multiple points due to boredom. At the beginning of the movie, there is text on screen that says this movie will show us one of the most brutal crimes committed in America. I will tell you, I have seen worse things on Twitter in the past week. The writing is terrible, it plays like a crappy ripoff of a Wayans Brothers film, I seriously laughed at a lot of points that were not supposed to be funny out of pure hatred. The two main characters who are supposed to be in a five year loving relationship have zero chemistry. Every action they take in trying to survive is the dumbest route they could have chosen. I really really hated this movie. It was bad. It degrades the masterpiece that is the original, and I mean that. The original is an incredibly scary and moving horror film, and this one shits all over it. I walked out of the theater chuckling to myself. Score 2/10

Synopsis Arachnophobia is a movie about Ross, a doctor who moves with his family to a rural town to take over the practice of the town doctor. When a Venezuelan spider arrives in the town through extremely unlikely circumstances, Ross must unravel the mysterious deaths in the town as killer spiders ravish the community. The townsfolk are dropping like flies, and it seems like the only hope for this city is a ragtag team of spider experts/doctors/exterminators/interns. Will they overcome the eight-legged hoard? Or will they be consumed by the hellish nightmare that is the common house spider? Review of Arachnophobia Arachnophobia is directed by Frank Marshall from a screenplay written by Don Jakoby and Wesley Strick. Starring Jeff Daniels as Ross and John Goodman as the exterminator, this movie gives a goofy and fun story that scares me to no end. I couldn’t get past a single scene without checking to see if there was a creepy crawly on my body. This movie is entertaining and enjoyable to watch, even for an arachnophobe like me. The story feels improbable, but not so far-fetched that the average spider hater won’t feel incredibly uncomfortable in their own home for weeks after watching. Score 8/10

Synopsis A group of friends rent a mansion to celebrate one of their birthdays and run out of alcohol. In their search around the house for more booze they stumble upon an old hand painted tarot deck and Haley, the friend who can read tarot cards, reads all of their horoscopes. Then chaos ensues as they start being killed one by one by the embodiment of the ruling cards in their individual readings. Review This movie isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen but it is also not very good. I did like the costumes and effects of the tarot card creatures, there were a few funny lines (and by a few I mean two), but the script and acting was definitely lacking, leading it to be predictable and a bit silly in a bad way. I was worried that this movie was going to be very offensive toward tarot as a whole, but it took a different direction than I had originally thought, but it still wasn’t perfect either. I wasn’t fully entertained, I scoffed at a lot of moves the characters made, but I wasn’t completely bored either.  Score 4/10

Synopsis The Birds is a romantic comedy turned aviation nightmare. When the rich socialite and practical joker Melanie runs into a charming lawyer named Mitch in a bird shop, she does the creepiest thing ever and tracks down his name and address. After driving hours to get to his weekend home in a small town called Bodega Bay. As Mitch and Melanie slowly but surely fall in love, the birds in the area seem to be going crazy and possibly waging a Planet of the Apes-style war except in this movie, the apes are birds. Eyes are plucked out. Hair is messed up. They kiss. What more could you ask for?  Review of The Birds The Birds, directed by Alfred Hitchcock, is a movie that cant really surprise you in any way. It’s basically exactly what you would expect it to be, a movie about birds that attack people. Melanie played by Tippi Hedren is annoying at times, but her creepy love for Mitch played by Rod Taylor is enjoyable enough to keep me engaged with the film. For me, it almost seemed random how the movie would be focusing on the relationship that building between these characters, and them some bird would just swoop out of the air and attack. There isn’t a lot of buildup or explanation about why the birds are attacking. In fact there is even a moment where the characters meet a bird expert, which would have been a good time to maybe give some information about why all this might be happening, but the bird expert somehow is completely wrong about everything she says, making me wonder why they even included that scene at all. In the end, it is a fine movie that kept me engaged enough throughout most of it but not really anything special to me.  Score  6/10

The newest horror movie Abigail from the guys that directed Ready or Not and the latest Scream movies, is in theaters now. Despite the trailer spoiling everything, it’s still a fun ride. Synopsis An elite operative team is assembled to kidnap a billionaire’s 12 year old daughter for ransom. They soon realize that they are in over their heads once it’s revealed the little girl played by Matilda’s Alisha Weir, is actually a centuries old vampire. Wacky hijinks ensue. Review of Abigail I had a mix of high expectations and low expectations going into this film. While the director’s filmography included Ready or Not, one of my favorite recent horror movies, the trailer pretty much gives away the whole plot, and had low quality Blumhouse vibes. I ended up really liking the movie. It’s going to be one of those movies that the less you know about it the more that you’ll like it. It establishes a micro subgenre of switcheroo vampire movies with From Dusk Till Dawn.  The film starts out as a typical heist thriller that knowingly points out the cliche archetypes of the assembled team, then quickly subverts them by giving them slightly more depth.   The titular character Abigail seems a completely innocent victim, but there is something off about her that makes you ask, is this bad child acting, or is this character hiding something? It ends up being both. While the movie is fun, there aren’t many super memorable moments, and plays out largely as you would expect.  The film loses something in the end with a twist that seems sudden and unearned when allegiances are changed in arbitrary ways. Score 7/10

Synopsis Creep 2 continues the story of Aaron, played by Mark Duplass, a serial killer who posts want ads on craigslist seeking documentarians who inadvertently film their own murders. Sara, played by Desiree Akhavan, has a failing Youtube show and decides to take Aaron up on his offer. Throughout her documentary of Aaron, she empathizes with him and barely believes him while he swears he’s a serial killer. On the other hand, Aaron seems like he has finally found his match. Will he kill her? Will she kill him? Is this the end of the craigslist serial killer as we know it? Review of Creep 2 Creep 2 is one of those sequels that actually gives a fresh look on the original. It does not repeat overdone tropes or follow the same story line whatsoever. This movie could stand alone and it still makes sense, and would still be very effective. There are funny one-liners, there are jump scares, there is a bad ass woman who won’t take any shit. This is not your typical killer chases victim movie. Besides the original, this movie is a fresh take on found footage horror, which is my favorite genre. It is excellent, it pulls all punches, and it takes you on a very adventurous ride. This truly is an exceptional feat of horror movie making as we know it. Creep was good enough, inventive enough, but this sequel takes it to a whole nother level. My only few complaints are that there could have been more fleshing out of Sara, since she is the central character, and I think knowing what’s gonna happen upon rewatching makes it a bit less effective. Other than that, it’s pretty damn good. Score 8/10

Synopsis The First Omen is a catholic horror movie and prequel to the movie The Omen. Maggie or Margaret is a catholic sister who moves from the United States to work in an all-girls orphanage and take her vows as a nun. While there she takes to a troubled girl named Carleta who seems to be slipping through the cracks of the orphanage while the other nuns consider her a lost cause and disturbed child. As she learns more about Carleta’s past Maggie struggles to protect her from the church which seems to have a sinister plan for her. The devil is involved. It’s a whole thing. The First Omen is directed by Arkasha Stevenson who co-wrote the movie with Tim Smith and Keith Thomas. Nell Tiger Free stars as Margaret and gives a stunning performance as a young nun.  Review of The First Omen The first omen is everything that Immaculate wishes it could be. It’s dark and sinister, giving a fresh and incredibly disturbing take on catholic horror.  The movie is long, which I am known for being a critic of, but I didn’t check my watch once during this two-hour-long movie. Its shocking without being distasteful, and Nell Free’s character Margaret is a delight to watch and gives a performance that I think will be studied and copied by many possession movies to come. Even with some of the seemingly out-of-nowhere revelations that keep the plot moving I enjoyed each twist and turn. Its scary, it’s disturbing, and it’s fun.  Score 8/10

Synopsis This movie, directed by John Harrison, is based off the TV series of the same name. It follows a wraparound story about a kid that is going to be cooked by a woman who kidnapped him, and he tries to get out of it by telling her stories from the titular book. This movie is an anthology, with one wraparound story and three tales from the darkside, filled with frights, fun, blood, and gore. Review of Tales From the Darkside: The Movie This movie is very 1990. The style, the gore remind me of late 80s early 90s horror. I have never seen the TV show, but I can see how this film could be nostalgic to those who grew up in the 80s and had a knack for horror movies. It’s always a hit or a miss when a TV show becomes a movie, but in this case, I think it is a romp. It’s fun, the gore is good, but it’s not very scary. With a 93 minute runtime and a star studded cast, I don’t think you could go very wrong with this movie. With all anthologies though, there are going to be stories within the film that are not very good, and this movie is no exception. All in all, it is a fun time. I didn’t hate it. If it wasn’t so predictable, I would give it a higher score, but it’s very average and that is okay sometimes. We don’t wanna watch the best movie of all time every single day. Score 5/10

Synopsis Night of the Living Dead is a zombie movie about a group of strangers who are funneled into a farmhouse and forced to work together for survival. Ben, our protagonist played by Duane Jones is a strong and courageous man who takes it upon himself to lead the group as they struggle to escape the zombie hoard entrapping them in the home. Through twists and turns they learn that friendship was what they really needed all along. Review of Night of the Living Dead Night of the Living Dead is a foundational horror movie that deserves to be a classic. It has a classic zombie movie feel and did a lot to inspire zombie movies in the future. Despite my enjoyment of the film, there are still points in the movie that feel slow, and the dialogue seems to repeat itself a lot when trying to explain the situation. The makeup isn’t always very convincing, at least not compared to modern zombie movies, but it’s almost refreshing to see zombies that aren’t completely covered in blood and gore. Duane Jones gives a fantastic performance as Ben, and it’s easy to root for his strong character. Judith O’Dea’s acting is a little over the top for me at times, and her character becomes pretty annoying, but hey maybe if I was in a zombie apocalypse I’d be just as scared and useless as her. Score 8/10

Immaculate, starring Sydney Sweeney is the new religious horror film that we’ll be reviewing today, and it goes hard at the end, so stay tuned. Synopsis Immaculate tells the story of a young American woman with heavy naturals named Cecilia joining a convent in Italy. It’s slowly revealed to Sister Cecilia that the convent isn’t as immaculate as it seems. The priest and other nuns seem to have ulterior motives for bringing Cecilia there. Once she discovers the convent’s dark and mysterious secrets, it’s too late. She be pregonate. Review of Immaculate Immaculate is a Catholic horror movie that somehow avoids all the tropes associated with that label. There’s no exorcism, no devil, and not even a  strong supernatural element. This subversion of expectations alone makes it an interesting horror movie. Structurally, the film is sound, but it feels more like a framework and not fully fleshed out. The themes and implications of the story aren’t fully explored. There is a lot of fertile ground here, in terms of exploring faith, devotion, obedience, and authority that are only skimmed over.  I wasn’t a big fan of Sydney Sweeney’s acting in the first half of the film. Her demeanor and vibe brought too much 21st century ambivalence for a character that is essentially a religious zealot. However, she won me over with her acting in the latter half of the film. The film goes pretty hard with the gore and body horror, but what else would you expect from a movie about pregnancy? We are given an early taste with a graphic leg breaking scene in the prologue, and the final moments of the film are some of the most visceral that I’ve seen in a while. The worst and most distracting element of the film was the sound. The score was terrible, and felt like it was out of a low budget student film. The Foley sound was almost comical with prolonged and impossibly loud creaks and squelches. Score 7/10

Synopsis Two American tourists David and Jack are hiking through Europe when they are attacked by a giant wolf in the northern moorlands of Britain. A month later during the full moon, David turns into a werewolf. But not any ordinary, this one is louder, friendlier, individualistic, and more confident than British werewolves. It wreaks havoc on London, biting and slashing through town while being openly patriotic. Review of An American Werewolf in London An American Werewolf in London is a classic 80’s horror movie that stands the test of time. Director John Landis brings the humor he is known for from Animal house and Blues Brothers, and combines it with the horror that he brought to behind the scenes of Twilight Zone: The Movie. The cast of relative unknowns David Naughton and Griffin Dunne bring a convincing casualness as college friends, and really sell the humor. The real star of the show is Rick Baker’s practical effects, and the werewolf transformation stands as the gold standard of metamorphoses on camera. While the film does have humor, I would more describe it as casual. Which is a great contrast to the gory violence and disturbing dreamy jump cuts that pop out at you throughout. The film isn’t too ambitious and keeps the plot to a basic monster movie reminiscent of the old universal horror movies, but it is spiced up with quirky 80’s flavor. Score 10/10

Synopsis Imaginary is a PG-13 horror film about Jessica, an artist and author who recently married Max and joined his family, becoming a stepmother to two girls. When Jessica’s father is moved into a retirement home, the family moves into Jessica’s childhood house in hopes of finding a fresh start. As the family settles in, the youngest daughter, Alice, appears to have a new imaginary friend whom she spends all her time talking to. The family soon finds that this new friend is anything but imaginary as it begins to wreak havoc on the household. The movie is directed by Jeff Wadlow and written by Wadlow, Greg Erb, and Jason Oremland. Review of Imaginary This might be one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. The script is not subtle at all, and none of the characters talk like real human beings. It’s almost like the writers knew what they wanted to tell the audience but had no idea how to convey their thoughts other than having the characters say them outright. The acting ranges from okay to downright awful, and somehow the best actor of them all might have been Piper Braun, the actress who plays the little girl. The movie could have been a tight hour and 20 minutes but chooses to drag on another 25 minutes at the end, making it feel like you’ve been in the theater for hours. Still, despite all my criticisms, there were a couple of scenes that I enjoyed, so I can’t fully commit to giving this movie a 1.  Score 2/10

Synopsis When a single dad who owes child support decides to rob a rich family’s home while he thinks they’re on vacation, he unexpectedly gets locked inside of a major house of horrors, with a sadistic mask wearing man who has already decided to wreak another kind of havoc on this family’s home. Review of The Collector The Collector (2009) is a quintessential aughts horror film. The quick cuts, the over the top gore, the good guy who is actually kind of seedy but has a good heart protagonist, the Saw-like green glow of some of the scenes is representative of the era it came out into. This movie came out the same year as Jennifer’s Body, The Human Centipede, Drag Me to Hell, Dead Snow, The Uninvited and many more very famous and quite renowned horror films. Although the critics didn’t like this one, with a 29% on Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes, I think that this movie deserves some love.This movie is definitely a hidden gem, with only a $3 mil budget, compared to other horror from the same year, with budgets as high as $30 mil. Even though critics hated it, it was a box office success, grossing over $10 mil. It’s fun, it’s inventive, there are a lot of unexpected twists and turns that keep you captivated. Although it isn’t the best movie I’ve ever seen, it has rewatchable value and it has a pretty great sequel, The Collection. If you like gore, if you like interesting kills and action packed scary movies, this one’s for you. Score 7/10

Synopsis A cop named Daniel drives an injured man to an understaffed hospital after he finds him bleeding in the woods. Upon arrival, Daniel realizes this will not be just another day on the job as he is quickly forced to draw his weapon on a nurse, who attacks him in a manic rage. Before Daniel can call for help, the hospital is surrounded by unknown figures in hoods who won’t come inside, but won’t let anyone leave either. Wackiness ensues. Silliness abounds.  Review of The Void The Void is some sort of hodge-podge that pulls from many different movies, creating a wild ride that barely gives the viewer time to breathe. The creature designs remind me of a monster you might have to fight in a doom video game, which is definitely a good thing, and the acting is for the most part, pretty good. Some of the twists and turns this movie takes feel a little forced to me, coming out of nowhere with what seemed like zero foreshadowing, yet instead of feeling shocked and blindsided I kind of just was like, “Oh okay. I guess that’s happening now”. I couldn’t tell if the movie was trying to say something about pregnancy, miscarriages, and losing a child. It seemed a little like it was, I just dont know how losing a child connects to triangles, pyramids, and drug-fueled sex binges, but that’s just me. Overall it’s an interesting movie, worth a watch but not a must-see for me.  Score 7/10

Before X and Pearl, Ti West brought us this 70’s horror callback. Synopsis Twelve years before the success of movies X and Pearl, Ti West’s first breakout feature film The House of the Devil was released. This film follows Samantha, played by Jocelin Donahoe, a broke college student trying to find a new apartment to get away from her annoying roommate. She finds a job posting that just says “Baby$itter wanted” and decides to give it a shot. After she gets into contact with a robotic creepy disembodied voice on the phone about the job, she decides to take it and have her friend, director of Barbie, take her to the house. Once she arrives to babysit, she realizes that this is not a typical babysitting job, and everyone who lives in this house is off their rocker. But, they’re paying her four times more than she asks for, so she decides it’s worth it. A scary old house in the middle of nowhere while caring for a supposed elderly woman that likes to keep to herself, where her only contact with the outside world is the pizza man, on the night of a lunar eclipse, what could go wrong? So much more than Samantha could have ever thought. Review of The House of the Devil After loving X and Pearl, I decided to give Ti West’s first movie a shot, and I was not disappointed. Like X and Pearl, Ti West’s editing and direction of the film is something to be revered, with his jump cuts and long shots and bone chilling zooms and set dressing, this makes for a good horror movie. It has everything a horror fan would want: pretty girls, lots of blood, a good setup for scares, a creepy attic, a weird old lady, satanic rituals, a friend who doubts the validity of the situation, and a final girl. It is shot on 16mm which gives the film a vintage horror feel, the way it was filmed and the story that was set up kind of reminded me of the original Black Christmas. Even the main characters looked alike. It is a bit slower to get into the action, but you know once you’re in it you’re in for a treat. All in all, this film is good, it is scary, it is artful, and I love seeing how directors started and how they have grown since their first films. I loved every second of it. I was scared, even upon the second watch. Score 9/10

Critics are split on this new movie from Zelda Williams and Diablo Cody, but We’re nearly unanimous, Lisa Frankenstein is a good time and you should go see it in theaters. Synopsis Set in the late 80’s, Lisa is the weird new girl in school dealing with the grief of her mothers death and life in a new family with a wicked stepmother and kind of nice yet condescending stepsister. She spends her free hours talking to herself and pining for love in a Bachelor’s cemetery, which is totally a thing. She has the hots for the editor of the school newspaper, and while chatting with him at a party, she drinks a spiked drink and goes into a psychedelic trip during a thunderstorm. Using 80’s logic, the lightning resurrects Lisa’s favorite grave resident unbeknownst to her. From there, it’s that age old tale of the goth girl that keeps a reanimated corpse in the friendzone while they murder people for parts.  Review of Lisa Frankenstein Lisa Frankenstein is a mess, but it’s a fun mess. As of recording, it sits at a solid 50% critics score on Rotten Tomatoes, and I’m honestly not surprised. I predict this one will be divisive, but could ultimately become a cult classic from it’s bizarre campy charm. The premise feels straight from the early filmography of Tim Burton, but unlike Burton, the freshman director Zelda Williams struggles with keeping a consistent style and tone throughout the film. Her background is in music videos, and it really shows in some of the narrative style of the movie, which relies heavily on visual shorthand more than hard earned character development and cause and effect. The script written by Diablo Cody of Juno and Jennifer’s Body fame is the highlight of the film. It taps into a level of snarky and campy humor rarely seen outside of 80’s teen romcoms. Like her other scripts, this one features sharp dialogue and amusing non-sequiters from supporting characters that makes the world fun to watch. The acting is great. Kathrine Newton who plays Lisa shifts from weird nerd to self assured goth murderess with aplomb. Cole Sprouse does great with comedic timing as the mute creature. Liza Soberano walks the line between condescension and likability really well as the step sister. Carla Gugino was the best at bringing the appropriate amount of camp to the stepmother. The main flaws in the movie are the disjointed tone and the arbitrariness of the plot. It would have been nicer to have more effort put into the setups for the major plot shifts and character changes. Without properly establishing cause and effect, the movie can feel confusing. But here’s the thing. With all the nitpicks I could pick at, I was smiling and chuckling throughout the whole movie. I thought it was a blast, and I give it a lot of points for originality.  Score 8/10

Synopsis Four petty criminals who film their violent crimes are strapped for cash, so they find a job to break into a creepy old house to steal a mysterious VHS tape. Once they’re inside, they slowly realize that this excursion might not be worth the money, as there is a dead man waiting for them in front of a wall of TVs and about a hundred tapes to go through. As they watch them, we see the tapes from their point of view and get to see what scares are in store every step of the way. Review of VHS VHS is a 2012 film with nine directors, with the most notable being Ti West (of X and Pearl), David Bruckner (The Ritual, The Night House), Adam Wingard (You’re Next), Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillet (Ready or Not and Scream 2022). This gaggle of directors comes together to launch their careers through five different tapes plus the main backdrop storyline to create a classic anthology film that sparked a franchise. This movie is included in the mumble-gore movement of the late aughts and early 10s, and perhaps is the most famous to come out of the genre. I have seen this film no less than six times, and while I rewatched it for this episode I realized that I knew it so well that I probably didn’t have to watch it again to recount it beat by beat and give it a score. To me, this is a modern horror classic. I really enjoy this movie, how it switches from a slowburn creep out to a ghost story to a slasher and so on. I think it is a great movie to get you into horror, it is a great movie to revisit, it is a great movie period. I am thoroughly entertained through every part of it, and even though not every tape is my favorite, I think all of it is very effective as a scary movie and I love the ambiguous ending. To quote my boyfriend when I told him what movie we were reviewing, “Oh so it’s a true syd classic.” It might be nostalgia, it might be the genotype, but whatever it is, I really love this movie.   Score 9/10

Synopsis Suspiria (1977) (not to be confused with Suspiria 2018) is a movie about a young American woman named Suzie who relocates to Germany to join a prestigious dance academy. As Suzie begins to adjust to her new life, she stumbles into a world of conspiracy that seems to surround her school and the dance instructors. People start to go missing while Suzie and her friend Sara attempt to put the pieces together. When the school’s staff start to show their true colors, Suzie must investigate the history of the academy before whoever is murdering the dancers makes her the next target. In the end, they all get more Suspiria than they bargained for.  Review of Suspiria (1977) Suspiria is directed by Dario Argento and stars Jessica Harper as Suzie. The movie, now considered a horror classic, uses unconventional lighting and color, which gives the movie a unique feeling and adds to the suspenseful atmosphere. The dialogue is kind of goofy at times, but to me, that is part of the charm. My problem with Suspiria is that with a run time of only an hour and 40 minutes, it somehow feels like a 2 hour + movie. The scenes drag on, probably to linger on the beautifully designed shots, and the plot is minimal compared to the 2018 remake, which expands on and adds ideas to the original. However, I say all of that just for the sake of being critical. I actually really enjoy this movie.  Score 8/10

What is this Horror Movie Talk+? This is a Patron pick, and we were more than happy to cover this Martin Scorsese thriller. Synopsis Shutter Island is directed by Martin Scorsese and stars Leonardo DiCaprio as Teddy Daniels, a rough-and-tumble U.S. marshal who doesn’t play by the rules. His partner, Chuck, played by Mark Ruffalo, also doesn’t play by the rules, but he is a little less rough and tumble about it. The two of them are assigned to investigate a missing person at a prison for the criminally insane located on a remote island. As the Duo look further into the mystery, they reveal more questions than answers, and it seems like no one is telling the truth.  Review of Shutter Island A lot happens in Shutter Island, and every scene feels like it is packed with symbolism and clues. Although I am not usually a fan of movies over two hours long, Shutter Island kept me engaged the whole way through, other than a few dream sequences, which I felt went on a little too long. The characters have deep and disturbing histories and it is fun to watch the whole mystery come unraveled. For a smart person who pays attention, the twist may seem obvious the whole way through, but that was not my experience at all. I was so confused the whole movie, and every attempt at filling me into what was really going on went right over my head until the pieces finally clicked together in the end and I felt like a big idiot for not seeing it sooner. It’s enjoyable, its weird, it’s dark, it’s thought-provoking, and the performances are great.  Score 9/10

Listen to us talk about possibly the greatest monster franchise ever, and how it just keeps getting better. Synopsis Directed by Takashi Yamazaki, Godzilla Minus One follows the story of Koichi (played by Kamiki Ryunosuke), a kamikaze pilot at the end of WWII who didn’t wanna go full kamikaze so he says that his plane is faulty and lands on Odo Island for repairs. Once there, a baby Godzilla arrives and decimates everyone, except for Koichi and Tachibana, the head repairman. Koichi eventually makes it back to his home in Tokyo to find that his parents are dead and Tokyo has been almost flattened by the war. Koichi encounters a girl named Noriko (played by Minami Hamabe) and she latches onto him for support for her and the baby she is carrying, and they become a happy family. A couple years later, Godzilla comes back, bigger and better than ever. Will Koichi defeat the monster? You’ll have to wait and see! Review of Godzilla Minus One This movie has it all. It had me laughing, crying, shocked, upset, and enthralled. To bounce from hard hitting emotional scenes to incredibly jarring and crazy action scenes and have it effortlessly flow is extremely difficult, yet director Yamazaki did it seamlessly. It was a wonderful movie that depicts Japan’s ruin and rebuilding after WWII, and how the war never left anyone’s minds even for a second. Oh, and Godzilla was absolutely killer. I have never seen another Godzilla movie in full before, but I can tell that they went back to the basics and kept what worked from the original and newer films. From the score, to the visual effects, to the character building, it was absolutely flawless. The Japanese invented Godzilla, it’s only right that they are the best at making films about it. Score 10/10

Synopsis When Kurt Russell’s son is forced into retirement from the MLB, he and his family move to a new house with a pool. The pool ends up being a death trap for his family and the neighborhood. But not in the normal way, this pool is extra scary because… that’s right there’s no gate! But actually it gets worse, the pool is also haunted or something. Review of Night Swim Night Swim is produced by Jason Blumhouse, and like most of his horror movies, this one stays in the shallow end of the pool. The main features of Night Swim are recycled tropes from much better horror movies. You’ll recognise borderline theft of the IT sewer scene, and the father descending into madness ala The Shining and Amityville Horror. It is an interesting concept to set a horror movie around a haunted pool. It taps into some latent fears about pools and deep water in general, but this movie definitely doesn’t crack the code and come up with a convincing premise. The ideas all seem half baked and made up as they went along. Is it a ghost? Are there many ghosts haunting the pool? Is the water an entity in itself? Is it a monkey’s paw? Sure yeah, whatever. So really the main thing that the film suffers from is a lack of commitment. There are many interesting ways you could go with it. Personally, I would have made the pool be haunted by the ghost of Marco Polo, and gone full horror comedy. The dialogue is also pretty on the nose at times, and feels like a paint by numbers script. There aren’t really any standout performances, but Kerry Condon as the mother is probably the most compelling and believable out of the cast. It’s not a terrible movie, but is very predictable and as MAx and Sydney would call it, “mid”. Score 5/10

It’s a new year and a new set of hosts! Listen up as Bryce announces the new permanent cohost(s?) of Horror Movie Talk, then we get right into reviewing When Evil Lurks. Synopsis When Evil Lurks is directed by Demian Rugna who also directed a film you may recall Terrified or Atterados. In this film, two brothers living on a farm find a man infected with a demonic disease. In order to save the town and themselves they do what they can to get rid of the man, but things quickly get out of hand. Our main character Pedro played by Ezequiel Rodrígue is rough, stern and a natural-born leader to his brother Jimi played by Demián Salomón who kind of just does whatever his brother says. The film gives a nuanced take on possession and while I think Terrified was scarier, this has a better story. Review of When Evil Lurks When Evil Lurks is heavy and doesn’t pull any punches. The violence is brutal and shocking and the makeup on the possessed people makes them look truly disgusting. The characters seem like real people and often dont make the greatest decisions, but are just doing the best they know how to do. The movie feels fresh and puts its own spin on demonic possession, but to say that this movie should be lumped into the same category as a movie like the exorcist believer is laughable. Though it uses the words demonic possession, it really ends up being something very unique. It feels like we as the viewers get to peer into the minds and culture of a deeply superstitious town in argentina which is an impressive thing to do. One of the best parts about this movie to me is that it introduces so much lore that people from this town all seem to just kind of know and understand as the truth, yet I never felt like I was struggling to catch up or understand where they were coming from. It is unsettling, and every scene feels like something new. Score 9/10

Merry Christmas and a Happy Saw Year! Synopsis Let me go into a little synopsis of saw x for you. In saw x we see the return of john kramer and he is searching for a cure to his terminal brain cancer. As he goes through the grieving process of his own mortality, he runs into a friend that may hold the key to a cure. An experimental surgery that is groundbreaking and exactly what john needs.  We get to follow John through his Journey to health but he finds out it’s not all what it appears, with hope fading John is ready to play a game with All new Traps but the same gore that we have come to expect out of the Franchise.  Review  Overall I did enjoy this movie, it had me squirming in my seat and kept me engaged for most of the film. Do I think this is a groundbreaking masterpiece? no , in my opinion it is the best saw movie since the first one. It’s what you would expect from a saw movie, traps and blood. I’m happy that we get to follow john and see another side of him and get more character development. There is definitely parts of the movie that don’t make sense for me but you pretty much know what you are going in for.

Will robo-santa win you over? Only if you believe. Synopsis CBC pits off-brand lead character Tori (Riley Dandy) against a malfunctioning, homicidal robot-Santa manufactured by Uncle Sam. Tori runs a shop next door to a toy store with one of the killer Kriss Kringles and … mayhem ensues. Review of Christmas Bloody Christmas Review: This flick takes the concept of intelligent tech (a concept popularized by 80s slashics like Maximum Overdrive, Deadly Friend, Chopping Mall, RoboCop, and Terminator) and Frankensteins it onto another favorite 80s concept: the killer Santa. Of course, the gold standard for killer Santas was set by Charles Sellier’s ‘Silent Night Deadly Night’ in 1984, but that doesn’t stop modern directors from trying to put their own special spin on the ax-wielding punisher of naughty boys and girls. Last year alone, we got three new entries in the category: Violent Night, The Mean One, and Joe Begos’s Xmas Bloody Xmas. I can easily say that Begos’s option is my favorite. Not because it’s a perfect film. The top half is talk-heavy. The lead character is somewhat annoying. And with Begos aiming for a Rob Zombie aesthetic – lots of neon light and oversaturated primary colors – much of the action is muddy and hard to discern, which is a bummer since some of the gore looks really good. Heads get stomped and split down the middle; eyes get poked with the ass-end of Santa’s ax, multiple cops gets shotgunned in the facial. This grindhouse gruesomeness isn’t helped by the cinematography, but I still appreciate that Begos shot the movie in 16mm and included plenty of gore for his core audience. There’s also lots of references to iconic horror properties; and, I like the cast. Riley Dandy delivers an effective final girl with Tori – the smart-mouthed and strong-minded record store owner caught in the middle of robo-SantApocalypse with a bunch of dimwitted men who refuse to listen to her advice. The exception is Robbie (played by Sam Delich), her equally saucy and opinionated employee whose Xmas wish (tho unstated) is to get into Tori’s pants. He gets his wish, and lasts longer than any of the other dudes because he actually listens to Tor. And that’s largely what this flick is about. But also, it’s a mindless blood-and-guts movie about a killer Santa that slices and dices without rhyme or reason. If taken with a big heaping boulder of salt, it can be plenty of fun.  Score 6/10

This fun exorcism romp is more fun than riding a Vespa across Europe. Listen to Bryce and Sydney break it down. Synopsis The Pope’s Exorcist is a 2023 film that follows Father Gabriele Amorth, the real life Chief Exorcist of the Vatican from 1986-2016, as he goes around to possibly possessed adults and children and cures them of their affliction, through unconventional and sometimes frowned upon means. The movie follows Amorth, played by the award winning actor Russell Crowe, as he tries to get rid of a very powerful demon that has attached itself to a little American boy named Henry, who has just moved into an inherited Spanish castle with his mother and sister. This movie is based on true events and documents from the Vatican, as well as being based on two books Father Amorth wrote before his death in 2016. There are some true elements to the story but a lot of it has been fictionalized to make this slightly scary, sometimes funny exorcism movie.  Review of The Pope’s Exorcist In reviewing this movie, we have to take into account how many movies try to be The Exorcist, and ultimately fall flat because no one could ever top the 1973 horror classic. This movie definitely takes cues from its predecessor, with the possessed boy shouting obscenities at his mother and the priests, body contortion, some suspenseful and mysterious scenes, and an origin story for the demon that honestly was refreshing to all the other long played out demon stories. This movie got better the longer it ran, but it is in no way a slow paced movie. Every minute has you wanting to keep watching. It starts off a bit basic for long time horror movie lovers like me, but it got more interesting as it progressed. And with a 100 minute run time, it is the perfect length for a movie night.  The script is very basic and mimics many other exorcism movies, and at times the characters would probably be better off not speaking than saying their bare bones lines to get the plot moving. But whoever wrote this movie was obviously highlighting Russell Crowe. They gave him the best lines, the most backstory, in a way he was the most, if not only, interesting character in the entire film. He solves everyone’s problems, he makes the characters and the audience laugh, we can sympathize with him while also being very interested in what his next move should be. As a viewer, it seems as though he had the time of his life filming this movie, and that is what makes it watchable in my opinion. There were good gorey scenes, some of the lines from the possessed boy were so outrageous that it made me step back and say okay maybe this movie has more going for it than I had originally thought. Ultimately, it is very entertaining, but it would have been nothing without Russell Crowe. Score 8/10

Do you believe that this sequel is good? It’s going to take some strong faith on your part. Synopsis The Exorcist: Believer is a direct sequel to the original 1973 The Exorcist. In this film, we get not one, but two, that’s right two possessions for the price of one. When two teenage girls go out into the woods to perform a séance, they disappear and reappear days later acting… strange. Their parents struggle to find out why the reason th… It’s possession, they are possessed. The father of one of the girls played by Leslie Odom Jr. must recruit an Oceans 11 type ragtag group of exorcists and Chris MacNeil reprised by Ellen Burstyn, who I can only assume had an important boat she wanted to buy. Review of Exorcist: Believer NBCUniversal shelled out 400 million on the rights to The Exorcist IP and entrusted David Gordon Green to work his soft reboot magic that he showed with the Halloween franchise. They’ve committed to producing two more of these exorcist films, and after watching this one… I’m not  a believer. Much like most of the previous sequel and prequels in the franchise, this film fails to recapture the humanity, darkness, and complexity of the original. You could point to the fact that they keep giving these movies to mediocre or hack directors, but even John Boorman fucked up The Exorcist 2, and he directed Deliverance. Also, since The Exorcist was released, it seems like there is rarely a year that goes by that there isn’t an exorcism themed horror movie in theaters. It’s a tired horror trope at this point. As a result, The Exorcist: Believer comes off as another generic possession movie going through the motions while skipping all the “boring” parts like relationships, character development, or mystery. A lot of eyes have rolled over some of the messaging in this movie about being woke. Ellen Burstyn’s line about not being part of the damn patriarchy and being excluded from the original exorcism comes off as heavy handed and completely detached from the story of the original film. I think Chris MacNeil’s character is the greatest casualty of this film. However, I think the root problem is that in trying to make Exorcism more inclusive and exploring the universality of evil, it comes off as wishy washy and noncommittal. Score 3/10 https://youtu.be/RAR4_7LCDIg

Hey remember David Day? He came back to listen to and respond to your voicemails with Bryce.

Who possessed these filmmakers to make one of the worst sequels of all time? The Exorcist 2 is a befuddling mess that bears no resemblance to the original. Synopsis In this sequel to the Exorcist, Father Lamont, played by Richard Burton, is assigned to investigate the last exorcism of Father Merrin to clear his name of any doubt of faith. Father Lamont finds Regan spending her time in therapy in a psychiatric institute that appears to be the backrooms of Westworld. Her doctor, Gene Tuskin, played by Louise Fletcher is testing out a new device that synchronizes hypnotic states… or something. In the course of her experiments and Father Lamont’s investigation, we find out that Regan isn’t Exorcized, but just mostly exorcized. In the end, we get more pazuzu than we bargained for… Review of The Exorcist II: The Heretic The Exorcist still stands as one of the best movies of all time, and still is my favorite horror movie. So I have always been intrigued by The Exorcist 2, and the fact that it’s so bad, that almost no one ever talks about it. Exorcist 2 is widely regarded as one of the worst movies ever made, and probably the worst sequel ever made. How does this happen? If you look at the cast, there are some real heavy hitters. The film’s cast includes one Oscar winner (Louise Fletcher) and five Oscar nominees (Linda Blair, Max von Sydow, Richard Burton, Ned Beatty, and James Earl Jones). It’s directed by Sir John Boorman, the director of Deliverance. In short, a bunch of people that should have known better than to absolutely abandon everything that made the original good. Instead of grounding the story in reality and the characters’ humanity to further analyze the nature of good, evil, and faith; we are treated to some kind of scifi supernatural fever dream. The film feels like it was written on the fly, and that’s not far from the truth. After it’s disastrous opening, it was pulled twice from theaters to be recut, and even after all that, this film is utterly befuddling. There are some scenes, especially involving the hypnotism device, that are so hilariously inept that it feels like they were written as jokes. If you dig deep enough, you can find some interesting ideas about good attracting evil, and the dangers of getting too close to evil, but they are completely overwhelmed by the bizarre choices in the story. It is a very bad movie, but the case can be made that it’s so bad that it’s good. This is definitely an oddity, and could be a good time with friends if you want something to riff on while watching. Score 3/10