Football Cliches

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a baffling Premier League incident depicted on a birthday card, an accidental new nickname for Micky van de Ven, Dutch football's rejection of the concept of top and bottom halves of a league table, a completely unwarranted use of "football club" by Tim Sherwood, rugby union claiming a try was a "screamer" and Mick McCarthy going into the jungle. Meanwhile, the panel attempt to define what it means to "tee up" a team-mate to shoot and take a deep dive into the classic hand gestures of substitutions. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is OUT NOW: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the shortest “spell” ever documented in football, the textbook body language of a player subbed off in the first half, people whose names sound like plausible Carabao Cup fourth-round ties, the best combined-years stat of all time and much more. Meanwhile, the panel decide the threshold for a team being "in charge" and ponder a psychological experiment relating to second halves of matches. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is OUT NOW: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, David Walker, and Nick Miller entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the joys of getting ready for five-a-side much earlier than you need to, the smug satisfaction of noticing something before the commentators do, the under-explored world of football TV studio furniture and the quintessential conditions for "nothing doing". Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: amateur league fortresses, Kylian Mbappe ascends to the "If Player X did that" throne, Mark Clattenburg's common-sense overload, some heart-stopping radio commentary from the San Siro, a disgraceful Carabao Cup hat-trick definition, a truly Dychian turn of post-match interview phrase, 2019/20 Brighton squad members popping up in BBC drama series Meanwhile, the panel detail the military ranks used in football and the do's and don't of goalscoring verbs in headlines The Football Cliches Live tour is next week! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a story of Sunday League admin woe, Jamie Carragher's vocal impression of a match ball waiting to be headed home, some typically made-up-sounding US soccer jargon, Callum Hudson-Odoi's goal-trademarking credentials, Referees Names in Things and the difference between "return fixtures" and "reverse fixtures". Meanwhile, the panel assure Oxford United that a three-sided stadium still be a "fortress" but fear for the future of the "if Player X had done that, we'd all be raving about it" concept. The Football Cliches Live tour is next week! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: predicting the cultural impact of Lee Carsley’s England reign, an Arsenal legend's name in the NFL, the acceptable context to use the word "side" for a team, yet more football-chant confusion in the audiobook world, and Richard Keys and Andy Gray's visit to Jon Obi Mikel's podcast. Meanwhile, the panel decide which specific scorelines someone could say they would have “taken before the game” and the most left-footed club in Premier League history. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and, on loan from the Career We Go podcast, Bobby Faghihi. On the agenda: the Nations League receives another stamp of approval from the language of football, some time-bending commentary from the Asian zone of World Cup qualifying, David Pleat provides a poetic twist on a Proper Football Man classic, unacceptable language from the Man Utd ticket office, puzzling penalty shootouts for England Under-18s, Elon Musk's "Earth-Mars transfer window" and the international-break exploits of Richard Keys. Meanwhile, the panel take a whistle-stop tour of the Acme catalogue of referees' whistles. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Jack Lang on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: the official Football Cliches Sporcle quiz, a beautifully baffling inclusion in a European footballer’s Wikipedia “Style of Play” section, elite-level football small talk in an early-2000s BBC drama series, the rather familiar name of New Zealand's 100m national record holder, an awkward footballing jigsaw-puzzle analogy and some scanning issues in the popular chant of "You're not fit to referee!" Meanwhile, the panel decide which players in a team can be said to have a "telepathic" partnership and survey the the various proverbial materials that injury-prone footballers can be made out of. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Jack Lang on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Charlie Eccleshare's Talksport tennis cameo, Peter Drury's new goalscoring surname obsession, Eddie Howe on Oasis goes exactly as you'd imagine, some assorted transfer-window curiosities, Andy Townsend speaks in iambic pentameter and some viral refereeing video content nobody asked for. Meanwhile, the panel decide if the "minute mark" of a game could ever be a thing, debate whether a lob can be "buried" and enjoy Richard Keys and the greatest quote-tweet of all time. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Michael Dawson's entry into the "so-called" pantheon, the latest bit of Romanian football-related small talk on Corrie, the threshold for "we owe them one", and the identity of the default Premier League website player silhouette REVEALED. Meanwhile, the panel marvel at an astonishing bit of agricultural metaphoring thanks to Ipswich Town's return to the Premier League The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: a welcome variation on a 'bit of both' from Gary Neville, the benefits of being as precise as possible when denoting how far out a goal is scored from, David Raya's sextet of goal-adjacent water bottles, and the weirdest 'for my sins' on a football phone-in ever. Meanwhile, the panel deliver their verdict on the subtle Champions League theme revamp The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the anxiety-inducing moment that the score disappears from the screen during a TV game, European superclubs who have other sports teams affiliated with them, players catching a glimpse of themselves on the big screen and when ironic cheering of the referee goes too far. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: The strangest way yet of expressing how young Brighton's manager is, a factual footballing catastrophe on an episode of Casualty, the most Peter Drury way of describing a player's pre-season performances, pre-game punditry wisdom and a curious story about Ajax's 1995 Champions League-winning team. Meanwhile, the panel decide when a team can be described as a division's "pacesetters" and who can be a "disciple" of an influential coach. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Diego Forlan as the most "tennis" footballer of modern times, some 8/10 football small talk on Coronation Street, the Premier League's ominous plans to tweet out VAR explanations in real time, the end of an era for the BBC and Garth Crooks, a superb fan-vs-player argument from non-league and Paul Merson's Strictly unveiling. Meanwhile, the panel reflect on some early teething problems for Sky's blanket EFL coverage and field the first-ever correspondence from a listener in Madagascar. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: new heights for the concept of "peak Watford", one last round-up of curious Olympic commentary, whether you can "crash out" of the Community Shield, a rusty opening Football League weekend for users of the language of football, the most perfect refereeing appointment in Football League history and Harry Kane refusing to lift a trophy on his return to the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Meanwhile, the panel sympathise with a Guardian article correction and provide the definitive list of things you can be "handed" in football. The Football Cliches Live show is back! Adam, Charlie & Dave are heading to London and Manchester on the 23rd & 24th September with a brand new show. Tickets available at: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Nick's unexpectedly gruelling journey to witness Jose Mourinho's managerial return, the continuing battle of the "knowledgeable" Olympic crowds, the most uncompromising coaches imaginable at a kids football camp, a highly-rated League One press officer and some more footballing road-sign inconsistency. Meanwhile, the panel select a lineup based on this summer's transfers that just seemed destined to happen, including Kasper Schmeichel's inevitable Old Firm move, various Turkish Super Lig signings, elite journeymen...but not Oli McBurnie to Las Palmas. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: some gloriously harmonious Olympic football commentary, some FA Cup revenge 72 years in the making, Man City's kick-off-delaying shame and a definitive analysis of where Premier League teams proverbially store their pre-season minutes. Meanwhile, the panel enjoy some niche Olympic highlights and decide which opening-weekend Premier League fixture has the most “watch it in a bar on holiday” energy. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: the moral implications of winning Most Improved Player two years in a row, the latest soap opera footballing small talk, a former England manager popping up in a 1980s US teen drama, the new Juventus away kit scraping the barrel for its inspiration and Richard Keys rolling back the years. Meanwhile, the panel select footballers who have overwhelmingly Olympic names. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether you can "build a team around" a left-back, a data dive into a flippant newspaper line about Danny Drinkwater’s corner-taking, Steve Coogan's forthcoming role as Mick McCarthy in a film about the Roy Keane incident at the 2002 World Cup, an EFL shirt crisis and some more of society's obscure awards Meanwhile, the panel weigh up whether Alexandre Lacazette is the textbook overage Olympic football squad member and decide the threshold for holding up an absent team-mate’s shirt during a goal celebration. Adam also announces his new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, which is available to pre-order: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Football Clichés Quiz returns and the latest opposition for the Clichés team are the world football experts from The Sweeper podcast, whose focus is the furthest-flung corners of the footballing globe. The questions include semi-forgotten all-Welsh strikeforces, title-winning island clubs, Swansea defenders with unexpected royal lineage, countries who don’t have their own league, made-up Dutch internationals, an obscure league where referees show blue cards and some tense FIFA world rankings action. You can listen to The Sweeper here: https://linktr.ee/SweeperPod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker on the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Alan Pardew reacting to the big US politics developments, fully media-trained MLS 14-year-olds, how much attention we should be paying to Olympic football, Nike's last ever Premier League match ball and the lineup for the worst Q&A evening in football history. Meanwhile, the panel decide how long it takes for "the dust to settle" after a big game and weigh up some technicalities over behind-closed-doors friendlies. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are working out how embracing opposition players became friends, the mundane rise of the "squad arrivals" video, watching football in a bar on holiday, late substitutes getting the Player of the Match award, the decline of footballers' autographs and the recent phenomenon of players geeing up the crowd after winning a goal kick. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel assess the latest Euro 2024 reference in EastEnders and whether you can "slice" a penalty wide. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the final Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether England's tournament failure was a "heartbreak" or "heartache", the Peak Montage moment of the pre-match coverage, the psychological pay-off of putting yourself through an opposition trophy lift, Chelsea's genre-revitalising marketing spiel for their new kit, a job advert for a VAR operator at Stockley Park and a quindecuple signing in League Two. Meanwhile, the panel strive for the technical definition of a player “popping it round the corner” to a teammate and decide the threshold for a "big money" transfer in 2024. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Nick Miller for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: a cultural review of England 2 Netherlands 1 (from Talksport to NATO via spoon-benders, chess grandmasters and The Killers), the true fan anthem of the Euros summer, a questionable chant for an international match and where Ollie Watkins now sits on the England clamour ranking. Meanwhile, the panel assess whether a Golden Boot winner scoring less than six goals can really be taken seriously and the big pre-season question: can an outswinging corner be described as "vicious"? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: an unexpected footballer's name pops up in the General Election polls, a radio commentator synchronising effortlessly with the crowd noise, a potential new twist in "penalties are a lottery" discourse, a cultural review of England's penalty shootout against Switzerland, whether Spain's last-minute win over Germany counts as a "dispatching" and the relative merits of displaying the clock in extra time as 90:00-120:00 (ITV) or 00:00-30:00 (BBC). Meanwhile, the panel decide what sort of game best suits the "never in doubt [wink emoji]" sentiment and assess a list of mid-range Euro 2024 performers who seem destined for a forgettable Premier League future. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: the Wimbledon tennis doing Wimbledon tennis things, a perfectly wrong football analogy on election day, the BBC's Cristiano Ronaldo penalty caption saga, how teams "make friends" at major tournaments, new Brighton manager Fabian Hurzeler gets the Mourinho treatment on day one, the most "high street estate agents" footballer name, Meanwhile, the panel decide the specific scenario that best suits the observation of "good feet" and enjoy Every News At Ten Report of the Football Match You Watched Just Before News At Ten, Ever Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: which player is at the front of the England clamour queue now, Jude Bellingham's self-referential goal celebration, the joy of Ally McCoist reacting to slow-motion replays, which Euros nations' capital-city streets are most likely to be "danced on", the transferrable football skill of "bending your run" in daily life and some concerning news about Mexican waves. Meanwhile, the panel ponder the acceptability of the tournament-exit verb "grouped" and whether anything can be "vintage Lamine Yamal". Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: the Stockholm syndrome of England at their laborious worst, Sir Geoff Hurst's silky-smooth product placement on Sky Sports News, one man's fantasy European competition for second-division clubs, and Keysey's inevitable mid-tournament solution for the Three Lions. Meanwhile, the panel explore the meaning of the physical footballing state of being "leggy", with some help from Clive Tyldesley and Martin O'Neill. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Ali Maxwell for the latest Euro 2024 Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: the depths of Euros short-form video content, a curious commentator intonation for a full-back receiving a pass in their own half, a dramatic VAR development in Major League Soccer, why some England managers get referred to by their first names and Messi/Ronaldo sentiment reaching the world of transfer reporting. Meanwhile, the panel also explore the nuanced rules of demonymic footballing adjectives and the mid-tournament trigger point for a nation being described as "holding its breath". Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the latest Adjudication Panel of Euro 2024. The agenda includes: the inevitable keywords of the latest England group-stage non-event, some eerily good Euros predictions from the pod back in December, the rampant Commentator’s Curse of Euro 2024, whether Arda Guler’s wondergoal met the “a star is born” threshold, some classic Andy Townsend punditry, a Dutch take on football clichés discourse, the textbook host-nation scenario and a surprise guest on a YouTube watchalong. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the first Adjudication Panel of Euro 2024. The agenda includes: the (very predictable) reaction to England's laborious win over Serbia, Gabriel Clarke (sort of) gives his update on the mood in the Cliches podcast camp, which country are "the most Group C team ever", what makes a shot go "agonisingly wide" and more niche highlights from the Euros so far. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On the eve of Euro 2024, Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker are joined by Michael Cox to select a lineup of players most inextricably linked with the European Championship. The deliberations feature a strict Greeks and Czechs quota, the "Kopke vs Toldo" dilemma, a Silver Goal scorer in the heart of the defence, a dinker, a scooper and a disgraced former UEFA president in midfield, a clamour for Alan Dzagoev, a frankly inevitable bias towards Euro 2004, Will Grigg on fire (and on the bench) and a battle of the one-hit wonders up front. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: an alternative methodology for calculating England's "years of hurt", the latest a team can take the lead "inside X minutes", the scourge of midfielders being included among the "forwards" in international squad graphics, the obligatory Euro 2024 "dark horses" debate, the Jack Grealish/Hellmann's mayonnaise Euros marketing calamity and obscure Arsenal figures namechecked in video games Meanwhile, the panel weigh up the merits of Germany vs Scotland as an opening game and field some important listener questions on hailing, left pegs and players who can "slot in". Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, David Walker and Nick Miller entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the "capo" (the one who conducts the Ultras chants with his back to the game), the joy of just kicking a football right up into the air as high as possible, clubs who have a generation-spanning “mentality” attributed to them, the horrifying split-second when the ball is passed out of frame during a TV game and - once and for all - just how many “years of hurt” it has technically been for England. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel reflect on yet another skincrawling moment for footballspeak in the political sphere and pick apart the mandatory pre-tournament custom of team-by-team guides. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Adam Lallana squeezing in the phrase "football club" three times in just 6.8 seconds, Gareth Bale declaring himself the last piece of Real Madrid's mid-2010s jigsaw, a former Chelsea captain popping up in The Wire, un-highlights-able sports and a very brief history of England's pre-tournament warm-up games. Meanwhile, the panel enjoy the inevitable development that was Jose Mourinho to Fenerbache and decide if you can declare a tournament's "surprise package" in advance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

With the curtain now closed on the domestic season, Football Clichés takes another look at the podcast's very best moments of 2023/24. In the style of the bafflingly beloved Premier League Years, this review features: A protracted summer transfer saga, the Pure La Liga XI, the finer technicalities of “ghosting in”, the birth of quiz format Happy Hunting Grounds, Gary Neville's unexpected Squid Game cameo, Eddie Howe being Eddie Howe, washing machines that sound like referees, The 'How Did [Player X] Never Play for [Club Y]?' XI, goalscoring chances that get "gobbled up", the Clichés Quiz taking on podcasting all-comers, the complex sovereignty of James Ward-Prowse territory, Andy Gray’s pretend conversations, "Gary Del Neil" and a long-awaited visit from Gary Lineker. The Football Clichés pod will continue throughout the summer, including Euro 2024 and more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and James Maw for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Eddie Howe's trip to the set of Neighbours, a technical query on the Premier League's save of the season, a stunning Match of the Day coincidence, Gus Poyet's JFK secret revealed and some heavy-metal Keys & Gray. Meanwhile, the panel decide when a club is truly "established" in the Premier League and whether signing two players from different clubs could ever be a "double swoop”. GET YOUR FOOTBALL CLICHES MERCH HERE: formysins.shop Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Football Clichés Quiz returns and this month's opposition for the Clichés crew is Tayo Popoola, Mark G Smith and Stuart Laws who are the brains behind scripted football comedy podcast Dial F for Football. The colourful questions include a kit-manufacturer mystery, players who somehow never signed for West Ham, ludicrous La Liga nicknames, Steve McManaman's unique units of footballing measurement, musical footballers, Premier League shortarses, some more classic foreign-language dubbing and, of course, Happy Hunting Grounds. Listen to Dial F for Football here: https://podfollow.com/1731856306/view Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: another commentator answering their own rhetorical question, a brand new "good X for a big man" variation, a tuneful Serie A commentary exclamation, a Match of the Day protocol scandal, a superb rendition of a bragging-rights commentary classic and an all-conquering Manchester ice-cream merchant. Meanwhile, the panel ponder which goals you can and cannot "pop up" to score and enjoy Keys & Gray's passionately-justified Premier League teams of the season. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker field this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the slow-motion facial expression of choice for a missed chance, why players don't take practice swings before dead-ball situations, the cynical optical illusion of double advertising hoardings and the scourge of fantasy XIs that have no tactical balance. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel reflect on Ange Postecoglou's emotional week, some more bemoaning of underappreciated English managers and the secret behind Manchester City's era of Premier League dominance. GET YOUR FOOTBALL CLICHES MERCH HERE: formysins.shop Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: mangled football chants in sportswear adverts, a textbook crisis-deepener for Manchester United, some re-recorded commentary curiosity, more Football Names in Things and a brief history of last pieces of Premier League jigsaws. Meanwhile, the panel examine a use of "who else but" for a goalscorer in ice hockey and reassess the "a goal worthy of" threshold. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Tom Williams on a midweek Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: 1930s musical-inspired chants for Premier League right-backs, the mystery player behind a Premier League Player of the Month trophy on eBay, an unlikely after-dinner-speaking football duo, a perfectly-preserved cultural artefact in the men's toilets at Tranmere Rovers, why the EFL needs to fix its promotion-celebration banners, and much more. Meanwhile, the panel enjoy one of European football's cult controversies from Tom's new book Va-Va-Voom: The Modern History of French Football and hear how France has embraced Premier League club nicknames. Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Erling Haaland confounds football's obsession with the star-rating system, Sky Sports News hunting down Arne Slot, Jamie Carragher on the Toy Story franchise, Peter Crouch misunderstanding rollercoasters and Keys & Gray's new refereeing admin nemesis is revealed. Meanwhile, the panel enjoy an above-average moment for football analogies in the political sphere. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The pod welcomes Gary Lineker for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Match of the Day host and England legend chooses his six personal fascinations and irritations of football. Among Gary's selections are his growing curiosity about expected goals, the psychology of penalty shootouts, the death of strikers rounding goalkeepers, a not-so-radical solution for quick free kicks, overindulgent TV slow-motion replays and the futile duty of pre-match interviews with managers. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel bemoan the misuse of "high-flying" for teams who don't need it and ask Gary a very important question about a Match of the Day tradition. Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether Arsenal won the north London derby "the hard way", when Sarcastic Pep becomes impossible to separate from Normal Pep, commentators answering their own rhetorical questions, teams "sealing" relegation, more footballspeak at the snooker, a footballer-sounding shampoo innovation and Harry Redknapp opening a local supermarket. Meanwhile, the panel analyse a listener's Missing Piece of the Jigsaw XI and enjoy some more vintage Andy Gray co-commentary. Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Football Clichés Quiz is back once again and this month the Clichés team welcome their latest podcast challengers in the form of the Totally Football Show's Michael Cox, Jay Harris and Sasha Goryunov. The questions include managers who just know their clubs, Monday Night Football hotbeds, Player of the Month merchants, some more A.I. foreign-language dubbing action, 'bit of both' punditry line-ups and, of course, the Happy Hunting Grounds round. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: some commentary highlights from the FA Cup semi-finals, a classic anti-VAR put-down, a surprise trumpet player on a George Michael album, football chat at the snooker once again, Guardian Football Weekly debating glancing headers and Thomas Muller ending the most tenuous footballing drought of all time. Meanwhile, the panel discuss what type of goal is best described as "a peach" and decide the maximum number of players involved in an X-on-Y counter-attack. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker field the listeners' April entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the hapless but unifying body language of a player who doesn't know where the ball is, a genuinely worrying peripheral astroturf hang-up, the downsides of teams from the same country being drawn together in Europe and the impact of the iPad on managerial decorum after their team has conceded a very specific type of goal. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: players forgetting it's a cup game in their post-match interview, notably young referees, Wayne Rooney's childhood Match of the Day dream, Barclays-era referees popping up in The Simpsons and Andy Gray answering his own questions. Meanwhile, the panel discuss teams "trying to score the perfect goal" and enjoy Matt Le Tissier being out-weirded for once. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The pod welcomes commentator Jon Champion for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as he chooses his six personal fascinations and irritations of football. Among Jon's selections are Ally McCoist's sheer enthusiasm for football (and life), the romance of the underdog, overseas fans' fascination with English football, the temptation of recency bias, the grilled shrimp at Minnesota United and the overcomplication of football terminology. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel grill their guest on the art of teasing your co-commentator and enjoy his recorded audio for Pro Evolution Soccer 2013. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices